/ftmg/ - female to male general

>>7839476
(((edelman)))

the memes are real

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>>7839557
He's pretty much goals

>>7839763
>being a foreigner

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How long did it take you guys to get a decent beard?

>>7839777
I didn't start growing it out until like 15 months on T.

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I'm sorry for messing up the other thread

I acknowledge my status as a failure

>>7839927
?

Thanks you all for the replies in the last thread. Sometimes i still have fleeting doubts on my transness but rarely.

>>7837801
Whoever i click with

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Don't care so much about your appearance if it is hurting you. Stay healthy physically and mentally by taking care of yourselves. You can do it!

>>7839777
I still don't have one and I'm two years on T. Just a shitty scraggly neckbeard.

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>>7840127

>>7840184
:(

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I'm not dead yet if anyone cares

>>7840341
Nice try ghost-poster

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>>7840375
no, am for real
>>7839777
does this count as beard?

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>>7840382
Oh boy I just realized I need a trim.

>>7840382
Mirin ramen cup

>>7840411
thanks, it was extra spicy shrimp and taste like plastic

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>>7840739

>>7840739
are you ftm? :O

>>7840799
how long on T did you start getting beard?

>>7840871
are you some kinda man, faggot?

>>7839777
I'll probably never know, I shave every day.

>>7840382
>>7840394
Stop being cute

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>>7840975
no

>>7840341

why would anyone think you might be dead ?

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When was the last time you learned something new?

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>>7841048
I have (had) chronic depression

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>>7841091
Depression doesn't kill. It creates sad potatoes.
Suicidality kills.

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>>7841103
I had suicidal thoughts and was on the verge of offing myself at any moment until a kind man gave me a little thing called LSD after I gave him 20$ and I sat and had a chat with myself and I haven't been depressed in 2 months.

>>7841091
how did you get better?

>>7841119
>>7841120
:^)

>>7841119
Awesome. I've never tried LSD. How much did you take? What did you see/experience?

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>>7841126

>>7841129
Don't expect it to be a miracle cure. I've done LSD 5 times and I'd still be clinically depressed if it weren't for psychotherapy.

>>7841129
2 tabs, I experienced a whole lot. Coming up I tried to draw but it was pretty complicated. I actually had a bad trip, my brain fractured into several personalities but it was okay in the end because I murdered them all (pretty brutal but they weren't real so it doesn't matter), I really don't remember much since this was 2 months ago now. I listened to a lot of music and it felt like the musicians were really talking to me and it was all positive stuff. Really I think the tipping point was when I sat down to watch TV and some guy said something like "wouldn't it be awesome if your anxiety just lifted away? Do you feel it just leaving you?" and I actually felt it. I don't feel depressed or anxious really anymore and I can't tell if that segment of TV was a hallucination or not.

>>7841136
everybody has incredibly different experiences. I've done acid 4 times since new years in the 1st month of the year, the first and last times I will ever do it.

>>7841136
Yeah I know, but it's worth a shot. I've been trying to find something that works for me. I already do all the conventional stuff and keep getting worse.

>>7841147
That's interesting. have you tried taking it outdoors sometime?

>>7841170
The one time I went outside while on acid, I was absolutely convinced we robbed a gas station, though we smoked a joint while walking around and mixing acid and weed is a bad combo.

>>7841091

you don't really talk about it so no one is gonna assume it's an issue... at least not that i've noticed...

>>7840063

np... it sounds like most of your doubts come from your mother feeding you bullshit and trying to make you unsure of yourself honestly... no offense, but when you talk about your personal perspective and then your doubts she seems to be the issue more than it being about who you are...

>>7840127

i wish i could be healthy just be taking care of myself...

>>7841147

that's cool, lsd like molly, shrooms, and ayahuasca has been shown to help with shit like that for people... the altered perspective and experiences do it

i've never taken any of those personally... environment mattering is what's kept me away... i've never been in a good place to take it when i could get it and never can get it somewhere that'd be good to take it

i figure if it ever comes up at a decent time i will but if not then oh well... i've never sought out anything i've taken, my first time with everything has always involved other people giving me something to try...

How do I stop feeling like I don't deserve HRT?

Should check out italianjocks.tumblr.com They practically all have beards >_>

>>7841084
Today I learned what a SATA connection is

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>>7840739
>>7840799
>Be cis
>Better beards than me

If I take testosterone will it help out?

>>7841706
Nope. You're fucked.

>>7841179
I don't find acid and weed to be a bad combo, I think that weed can reduce the feeling of mental clarity that acid gives and make it harder to talk but it by no means is a "bad combination" like booze and MDMA for example

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What do you do when feeling down?

>>7842163
I don't really feel down in general but when I'm not all there I just work out.

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Is it normal to doubt if I'm trans? I've been on Test for 2 years, love my beard and stuff. But, every once in a while I have really deep anxious moments where I remember I was pretty as a girl, where I miss wearing dresses and having a cute soft voice. Looking back on my girl pictures I wonder how I was uncomfortable being "her". The next day I go back to normal and love being a man. But this happens periodically. Maybe it's because transitioning has been extremely stressful?

>>7841650
I'm Italian and I look like a fucking eastern european mongoloid, never blessed with master race Mediterranean genes

>>7842241
Seems kinda weird that you'd miss it, maybe you just miss the idea of it. As long as you're happier now I wouldn't worry about it too much.

>>7842281
>eastern european mongoloid
Y u bully

>>7841709
So how do you guys go from zero to 80 with T but I can't use it to reinforce some trouble areas?

>>7842360
Some transguys never get beards. It all depends on genes.
Some transguys look like ugly lesbians their entire lives.

>>7842163

drugs, sex, alcohol, play guitar, go on a walk, meditate, talk to other people so i can focus on their shit instead of myself, taking a long shower til my feelings pass (i wash my hands and take showers or run water over my wrists and such as stress relief too it's not just germ related for me), try to distract myself with pretty much anything really... and i always kinda figure my feelings don't matter anyway so i can push them down pretty quickly and move on...

>>7842281

whenever people say shit like that i always wonder if they're being hard on themselves or actually look like that... got that song mongoloid stuck in my head now btw, makes me think of that movie ex drummer...

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>>7842241
Decartes approves

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>>7842701
Freeze them and make banana ice cream

>>7842360
Because you're a cis guy.
Transguys use T to get to normal levels. We're not any more roided than a normal guy.

As the other anon said, you can get bloodwork to see if you have low T.
But if your T levels are normal and it's just genetics keeping you from getting a beard, oh well.

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>>7842760
>slimy texture
You are doing something very wrong my friend. It's supposed to get fluffy and nice. Have you tried using eggwhites or aquafaba for that floofy effect?

>>7842826
yep, chickpea water. Some vegan faggot found out it gives the same effect as eggwhites, so it might be a good alternative if you can't into eggs. just drain a can of chickpeas and use the water for the ice cream. aquafaba and frozen bananas in a blender. Good stuff.

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>>7842928
each for their oven, I guess. Comfy nanabred works too

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26 ¶ And God said, Let vs make man in our Image, after our likenesse: and let them haue dominion ouer the fish of the sea, and ouer the foule of the aire, and ouer the cattell, and ouer all the earth, and ouer euery creeping thing that creepeth vpon the earth.

27 So God created man in his owne Image, in the Image of God created hee him; male and female created hee them.

28 And God blessed them, and God said vnto them, Be fruitfull, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it, and haue dominion ouer the fish of the sea, and ouer the foule of the aire, and ouer euery liuing thing that mooueth vpon the earth.

29 ¶ And God said, Behold, I haue giuen you euery herbe bearing seede, which is vpon the face of all the earth, and euery tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yeelding seed, to you it shall be for meat:

30 And to euery beast of the earth, and to euery foule of the aire, and to euery thing that creepeth vpon the earth, wherein there is life, I haue giuen euery greene herbe for meat: and it was so.

31 And God saw euery thing that hee had made: and behold, it was very good. And the euening and the morning were the sixth day.

>>7839476
>>7839588
what a fucked up skull shape.

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And the LORD God tooke the man, and put him into the garden of Eden, to dresse it, and to keepe it.

16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of euery tree of the garden thou mayest freely eate.

17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and euill, thou shalt not eate of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof, thou shalt surely die.

18 ¶ And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone: I will make him an helpe meet for him.

19 And out of þe ground the LORD God formed euery beast of the field, and euery foule of the aire, and brought them vnto Adam, to see what he would call them: and whatsoeuer Adam called euery liuing creature, that was the name thereof.

20 And Adam gaue names to all cattell, and to the foule of the aire, and to euery beast of the fielde: but for Adam there was not found an helpe meete for him.

21 And the LORD God caused a deepe sleepe to fall vpon Adam, and hee slept; and he tooke one of his ribs, and closed vp the flesh in stead thereof.

22 And the rib which the LORD God had taken from man, made hee a woman, & brought her vnto the man.

23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shalbe called woman, because shee was taken out of man.

24 Therefore shall a man leaue his father and his mother, and shall cleaue vnto his wife: and they shalbe one flesh.

25 And they were both naked, the man & his wife, and were not ashamed.

>>7842701

if you have pineapple you could make hummingbird cake, it's a banana pineapple cake with cream cheese frosting... i made one a few years ago for easter with a vanilla brown butter cream cheese frosting and everyone went crazy over it...

banana bread works too though... last time i used bananas to make anything it was banana oatmeal cookies my s/o and his sis loved them...

could also make banana cream pie or some shit like that... or cook them in a pan with brown sugar, cinnamon, etc (whatever else you feel like throwing in...) and use them as a topping for something

>>7842760

peanut butter or tahini and coconut cream make the texture better... i don't think it's slimy to begin with but those help...

>>7840739
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

t. cis gay male who can't grow facial hair

>>7842990
>>7843023

i prefer that part of 2 kings where elijah is walking up the mountain and the kids are teasing him calling him bald and shit so god sends bears out of the woods to maul the kids... can't remember which verses that one is...

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>>7843023
>>7842990
Shalom
skydaddy
hail satan

>>7842281
Italian and my father looks like Colin Farrell for some reason.

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1 Now the serpent was more subtill then any beast of the field, which the LORD God had made, and he said vnto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of euery tree of the garden?

2 And the woman said vnto the serpent, Wee may eate of the fruite of the trees of the garden:

3 But of the fruit of the tree, which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shal not eate of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.

4 And the Serpent said vnto the woman, Ye shall not surely die.

5 For God doeth know, that in the day ye eate thereof, then your eyes shalbee opened: and yee shall bee as Gods, knowing good and euill.

6 And when the woman saw, that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she tooke of the fruit thereof, and did eate, and gaue also vnto her husband with her, and hee did eate.

7 And the eyes of them both were opened, & they knew that they were naked, and they sewed figge leaues together, and made themselues aprons.

8 And they heard the voyce of the LORD God, walking in the garden in the coole of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselues from the presence of the LORD God, amongst the trees of the garden.

9 And the LORD God called vnto Adam, and said vnto him, Where art thou?

>>7843078

what's with the letters being all fucked up in some of the words?

>>7843078
haha I can relate, my father has schizophrenia, I can speak your language

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And hee sayd 'I heard thy voice in the garden: and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid my selfe.

11 And he said, Who told thee, that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee, that thou shouldest not eate?

12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gauest to be with mee, shee gaue me of the tree, and I did eate.

13 And the LORD God said vnto the woman, What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, The Serpent beguiled me, and I did eate.

14 And the LORD God said vnto the Serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed aboue all cattel, and aboue euery beast of the field: vpon thy belly shalt thou goe, and dust shalt thou eate, all the dayes of thy life.

15 And I will put enmitie betweene thee and the woman, and betweene thy seed and her seed: it shal bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heele.

16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorowe and thy conception. In sorow thou shalt bring forth children: and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and hee shall rule ouer thee.

17 And vnto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened vnto the voyce of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commaunded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eate of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake: in sorow shalt thou eate of it all the dayes of thy life.

18 Thornes also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee: and thou shalt eate the herbe of the field.

19 In the sweate of thy face shalt thou eate bread, till thou returne vnto the ground: for out of it wast thou taken, for dust thou art, and vnto dust shalt thou returne.

20 And Adam called his wiues name Eue, because she was the mother of all liuing.

21 Unto Adam also, and to his wife, did the LORD God make coates of skinnes, and cloathed them.

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>>7843031
>banana oatmeal cookies
recipe pls

>>7843082
native engrish speaker only

>>7843078
Did he shave his body hair? He looks like a fag

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Dont forget to report spammers

>>7843090

i don't have one...i made them while i was really high and since i've been baking a while i can just eyeball shit and get it right... i just made them cuz they wanted a dessert and we didn't have much in the house + it was too cold to bother going outside... but you know how oatmeal cookies have eggs in them sometimes? use bananas as a substitute (blend them really well first) cuz the rest of the flavours are light you can really taste the banana + basic cookie stuff like cinnamon, sugar, and vanilla go into it...

so any basic recipe will work just make that change... but if you wanna do something better than just following any recipe you could do what i do when i'm figuring out how to make something new... i look up 5-15 recipes find everything they have in common, write down any ideas that sound good, and then guess what might make it better and combine all that to make something else... it's just good to get a basic idea of measurements if you don't know them offhand or can't see what they need to look like

>>7843095

it makes genesis just that much worse to read...

>>7842343
Because I could have had glorious Mediterranean features, which my family has, but I lost the genetic lottery and I look exactly like this eastern european great grandma, so I am pissed at slavs. I even have monolid eyes, which is weird, cause they're blue\gray
>>7842398
I say I look like a mongoloid cause of chink eyes and flat wide face

>>7843090

+ once you find all the basic shit any given recipe needs you can see where you can fuck around with it and change it around without fucking it up...

>>7843156
lol @ slavic mtf's

where are all the Russian supermodels?

>>7843214
spam is a rule violation.

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>>7843218
Lol @ being Slavic

>tfw

>>7843214
Sometimes I think my dad got cucked by some untermensch eastern Russian, which would be more likely than having taken after my grandma's mom

>>7843218
Slavic femboys and mtfs are often god-tier, i'm going to be honest here

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>>7843129
>>7843175
True. I do the same because I usually have to tweak out any stuff that triggers my IBS. For some reason I don't react to bananas anymore, so I'm planning to go full monkey mode for now.

>>7843156

oh got'cha, you meant it in the racial sense not the retard one...

>>7843281

i just do it cuz i don't like following instructions... i usually make shit for other people rather than myself so i don't have to worry about what i'm gonna react to...

bananas are one of the few things that never bother me

One month on T and I am not used to this whole voice thing yet. I knew I was getting squeaky last week. Now it feels like I constantly have a sore throat, like it's straining to speak at the pitch I'm used to, but I'm not used to speaking deeper so I keep defaulting to the higher pitch anyways.

Speaking in that lower pitch vibrates differently now, too. Feels weird even if it's more comfortable.

Any tricks to finding a pitch that feels comfortable again and actually speaking in it regularly, or is it just going to take practice?

>>7843247

not really with the way genetics work... recessive traits showing up a couple generations in is highly possible

Been reading some stuff on reddit and I continue to be really fucking glad my therapist is experienced with trans men. I didn't realize before now how many "trans" specialized therapists really only have experience with trans women

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>>7843326
You radical you. What kind of stuff do you make? Anything other than meat that triggers the OCD?

>>7843385

i just find the idea of making something that's entirely someone else's boring...

mostly bake cakes, bread, cookies etc... mostly cakes though... i like getting high or drunk and decorating them

i don't really cook aside from that or breakfast (and that's like... i get bored and make my s/o omelettes using whatever's in the fridge or just like pancakes)

i make some italian food, but like the arancini i make is based on my great grandmother's which wasn't traditional to begin with, eggplant parmigiana, homemade pasta shit etc, but it's rare

did cook last night though.... made my s/o a beer bread pizza last night cuz he was at work and i knew he was gonna be tired and hungry when he got home but usually he does most of the cooking cuz he's into that

it's only meat that i can't touch or deal with... i don't even like touching it when it's package... nothig else bothers me like that

>>7843496

nothing*

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Ugh just got home from trans support group so fucking painful. I know I came off like an asshole but one of the dudes there complained about the fact he refuses to have friends who are even the slightest bit transphobic, homophobic, Islamophobic, racist, or sexist- Or anyone friends with anyone like that. His example was talking about Rowling's new movie or w/e with a coworker and her boyfriend and he brought up the fact Rowling appropriated Native American culture. The coworker basically said 'you really shouldn't bring politics into Harry Potter' basically trying to steer away from the convo.

Like am I out of touch? I tend to be pretty understanding of why people feel a way they do even if they disagree. It isn't that 1% of us are 100% evil, it's that 100% of us are 1% evil. Like we justify buying clothes and products made in sweat shops, eat food animals suffered to provide meat for and habitats were destroyed for farmland to grow. Not that we shouldn't try to fix things best we can, but none of us have any grounds to act like we're 100% right about everything, and all of OUR evils are justified but no one else's are.

Lately I hear so fucking much "People just don't want to listen" said implying 'people' doesn't include THEM. We're all just justifying our evils and trying to pick what options minimize suffering based on our own skewed view. His views and suffering are completely valid and I agree being trans fucking sucks and people are ignorant but how can I hold others to standards I don't also hold to myself?

>>7843524

he sounds like a hyper sensitive, whiny bitch... there's no understanding someone who's that much of a pussy unless you're one yourself

>>7840891
Thats a lucky encounter! Shocked to hear you transitioned so long ago. Were you seeking out T before that, or just wandering through life as a girl?

I'm also from Canada and a non transitioning AGP and when I was 20 in 2004 I had no idea hrt was a thing. I had zero courage to be gender non conforming anyways.

That's a great beard your rocking, easily as good as mine.

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>>7843575
Like I hear what he's saying, I do. It's shitty when we remain silent when we see injustice in the world, and I think this happens a LOT for LGBT issues in that we seem to be an 'acceptable loss' viewing morality as maximizing happiness of many at the cost of a few. I'm going to text him later and make sure he realizes I wasn't invalidating his struggles. He's pre-t with no intentions of starting T at the moment so despite my feelings about THAT he does have to deal with issues I don't have to because I pass. But if you take on every little injustice in the world you will fucking kill yourself, and it's not fair that I get painted like an asshole because I approach things assuming people don't TRY to be evil.

>>7843656
Yep he's not even 21, and is taking all the stereotypical 'woman's studies' courses though thankfully for him he's moving toward women's health so he has a career. I mean I'm thankful someone is over the top SJW so I don't have to be, but it's not fair to put down others experiences about things.

>>7843646

well what's the difference between staying silent and avoiding reality when you don't like it? if he can't even have friends who have views he doesn't approve of then he may as well be silent cuz he's sure as shit not having discussions outside of an echochamber... so he's ineffective and hypocritical...

surrounding yourself with people who only have views you share and like is a good way to never grow, and it's a good way to not make any changes either... it's no different than being silent, what's the point in speaking loudly in a safe space?

and honestly... i'm 30 and haven't been able to get treatment cuz my life is shit so him being pre-t is meaningless to me when i say: he's sounds like a complete pussy, and he needs to stop being a whiny bitch

yeah injustice sucks, yeah people should speak up when they have strong convictions... but there's a difference between having strong convictions and complaining about everything while being completely unrealistic

no shit... you're trying too hard to be sensitive towards someone who needs to people to stop catering to that kinda oversensitive, overly pc bullshit...

you're not the asshole, he is...

>>7843656

i hate the "appropriation" shit too, like someone appreciating another culture or being inspired by it is somehow a negative thing...some people just find a way to bitch about anything and everything, even when there's nothing worth bitching about...

>>7843681

i never got why anyone would take women's studies, all the chicks in there are probably ugly, angry, and may as well be sexless...

>>7843338
Stop being a pussy about it and just be mindful of it. If you want to be male you shouldn't be trying to speak at a higher pitch anyway. Part of my success when I was pre-T and then when I started was that I was already speaking at a lower pitch, which made the entire process of my voice deepening easier and more natural despite the occasional hiccups that are to be expected in vocal puberty.

The biggest giveaway for most trans men no matter how good they look post-T is that they sound like a chipmunk because they never stopped speaking at a higher pitch. That's what you're dooming yourself to.

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>>7840739
quality beard senpai

>>7843717
>It was a "holy shit, is that even an option" moment.
Same with me, and why I took so long to do anything.
I knew people got sex changes but I didn't know how or why, it's one of the reasons I wish this kind of shit was covered in school/media more.

Entirely unrelated but the captcha reminded me: any good beer recommendations? Usually I just drink sweet fruity cocktails but I'm interested in branching out a bit more.

>>7843904

as far as beer goes i like yeungling, killians irish red, and dogfish head midas touch... there's also hard cream soda and hard ginger ale that's pretty good the brand is not your father's

i prefer whiskey, spiced rum, jager, and red wine though... but i'll drink fucking anything including cheap as shit vodka (the kind that comes in those giant plastic jugs that may as well be paint thinner)

>>7843933

+ actually technically not anything... i don't drink cocktails and mixed drinks unless it's like throwing a few shots of vodka in beer to make it go down easier or just mixing alcohol with another kind of alcohol (whiskey's good with amaretto btw)

also if it's legal where you are and you're ok with low quality cheap as shit alcohol there's always md 20/20 (it's illegal in some places cuz it's 13% alcohol and a decent sized bottle is like 5 bucks)

>>7844241

i don't get drinking without the goal being to get drunk... what's the point then?

i'm actually working on that right now whiskey and beer + it's not about hating life it's about enjoying shit... i mean sure i can listen to old punk music and dance around with a bird sober, but drinking only adds to it

>wacky hormones, probably PCOS
>extra facial hair
>teenage me is nervous and paranoid
>develop some kind of trichillomania
>unsure if I'll ever be able to grow beard with T

>>7843933
>>7843980
>>7844241
I'll look into them, thanks.
I want to try rum/spiced rum but I never really think about it when the opportunity arises.

>>7844419
I drink just for flavors, really.

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My cis friends are getting girlfriends and boyfriends and whatnot lately and I'm really happy for them but also saddened because that will never happen because 5'3 and not on t

>>7844540

spiced rum is good if you like coconut there's malibu... other rums are alright too, i prefer whiskey and brandy personally...

i don't care entirely for the taste of alcohol so drinking for flavour is pointless to me...

>>7844554

can't say i give a shit about the history of an alcohol when i'm drinking... toasting a couple followed by more drinking is what i do at weddings... the 4th of july is about bbqs, getting drunk and high, looking at fireworks and then having sex and passing out as far as i'm concerned... last time i only drank with friends it was about getting drunk together and talking went from rum to trying a bunch of different beers at a gas station nearby when it got too late to go to a liquor store

i like altered states of mind... i can enjoy sobriety too, it's good to have a sober day here and there for balance

alcohol can make a lot of things more enjoyable... i spent last summer getting drunk and high and playing in a river...

altered states of mind can make a lot of things more fun than they are sober... considering your first comment about enjoying being drunk being a matter of "hating life" seems like you're kinda judgmental about it... altered states of mind are one of the pleasant things about being alive

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>>7844653
I'm not as concerned with my height since I've been running into a lot of short girls lately (5'1" by the way), but also feeling the >not on T thing.
I still can't get over this feeling of inferiority that straight girls have to downgrade just to find me acceptable, since there's no dick here. Even with SRS it's just not the same..

>>7844653

i don't see why your height and current place in your life would prevent you from finding someone or equate with you "never" finding someone...

>>7844685

you'd be surprised by how easy to please straight chicks are in bed... a lot of them have unsatisfying sex lives... just saying

>>7844691
It's not just that.. Just the whole trans thing, and also how fucked I am mentally because of this and other shit. I don't think I would do well in a relationship

>>7844685
Yea, I feel bad for even wanting to be with a straight girl. Like they shouldn't settle for me when they could have better.

>>7844694
Very good point but I can't really see a *lasting* sexual relationship with them. Eventually they're going to want a massive cumming dick and I can't provide that.

>>7844774

well that's different... if you feel incapable of it... though being fucked up and trans don't mean someone isn't...

idk... in spite of how fucked up i am relationships seem to be the only thing i'm good at... been with my s/o for 12 years (13 this halloween), when relationships i've been in have ended it's never been cuz the other person was over me... even friendships i have when i get close to people they tend to want me around all the time and nearly always want to live with me and shit or tell me they're in love with me etc

idk it seems easy to just kinda end up in relationships even without that being an idea or a desire... for me anyway...

i can't really judge your situation cuz idk why you think you're too fucked up to be with someone, but... being trans can mean more to you than it will to another person when it comes to you, and everyone's got their damage... being fucked up doesn't mean a person is incapable of doing the things they need to do in order to be in a relationship

>>7845178

no shit that made me laugh... you're just talking about your personal insecurities there rather than the reality of a relationship... there's a lot more to relationships and loving someone than sex, and there's a lot more to sex than what the other person has between their legs...

not to mention most guys don't have "massive" dicks, plenty of straight girls prefer shit like oral, and "eventually" in a straight relationship can easily turn into rarely fucking or not fucking at all...

when i say a lot of straight women are unsatisfied sexually in their relationships i'm not exaggerating or making shit up... a cis guy having a dick doesn't make him worthwhile or good in bed... and you're projecting your own body issues onto shit as if that's all that's between 2 people in a relationship

i'm not saying being trans is ideal, but a chick overlooking that to begin with to be with you means that's not what matters to her

i like ftmg it got me a hot ripped boyfriend

>>7840799
Wtf your beard is better than my Cis male Italian shit. Am jealous. But u go u

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>>7845369
Nah it is an insecurity, I know that. Sex is just really important to me and I'm frustrated that I can't really do all that I'd want to.

In other news, I have my first appointment with a therapist tomorrow.

>>7839777
8 months for a full beard, but I know I'm an extreme exception.

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My ferrets love their salmon oil.

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I'm not having a good time, guys...
>on T for about 5 years now
>totally full time with name legally changed.
>had to stay in the hospital twice last year on heavy duty IV antibiotics.
>I'm also diabetic
>Endo finds elevated liver functions. Tells me no T until a specialist looks at me
>can't find one that will take my insurance
>start spotting
FUCK
>start taking half my T dose against dr's orders.
>a few months pass. Still looking for a liver doctor
> started full-blown menstruation last night
hello darkness my old friend
I'm frustrated, angry, and uncomfortable in every way

>>7845818
What does the picture represent?

i feel like my rib cage has deformed from binding for so long, im 21 and have been binding since i was 17. anyone else worried about this?

cisbro reporting, how are you lovely fucks
ask me questions, yell at me
tip of the day: Rogue Brewing is SHIT it has always been SHIT they can FUCK off

real tip of the day: there are three types of spending the kikes look at to decide your credit score, rotating, car, & housing. rotating is random stuff you put on a card car is car payments, housing is loan payments. pay the first two off totally each month, & the third regularly, to boost your score. don't open a bunch of cards & don't charge more than half your total limit at a time.

>>7845820
In hindsight, its not the best pic for the post.
But I guess I've never tried to fool myself that I wasn't born with that biology. Even if my insurance would cover it, I'm not sure I'd have a hysterectomy.
I did think I had it soundly asleep, "locked up" and tucked away firmly in my past.
Its like every cramp is just my body reminding me that everything I've done so far is just a fresh coat of paint on the same car. Its all just skin deep.
Sometimes it feels like the me I want to be, the one I'm trying to live as, is just a lie. Setbacks like this seem like that "fact" crawling back to the surface and screaming for me to give up...

On my period with antidepressants that need tweaking...not a good mix...

>>7845929
>Sometimes it feels like the me I want to be, the one I'm trying to live as, is just a lie.
The only you is who you really are, including the life you want to live. Your body isn't the real you. It's just a vehicle you are in.

>>7845917

ever have to deal with an outstanding warrant?

>>7845996

had an uncle who had a bench warrant out. he finally go his shit together & got an attorney who handled the while thing but it cost him.

whole thing was for a traffic violation from years ago, he didn't know for a while & then ended up feeling like a hunted man until he just got it done

but not personally. arrest warrants are a whole different bag of cats, too

what's up?

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Do you guys have any favorite FtM pornstars?

I really like Puck.

>>7846094
Is there any way for trans men to fix their huge nipples btw?

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>>7846094
All of you people are lesbians who just have daddy problems.

You need daddy dick.

It's a fact that lesbians/ftms fantasize during sex that they're upsetting or provoking their dads.

All you "FTMs" aka Dykes have this unconscious father trouble.

You look ridiculous and need therapy to work through your father complexes.

>>7846210
is therapy code for "my dick"

>>7846210
oh yeah, many dads are real upset that their daughters are banging hot chicks

>>7846210
KEK. Me and my dad get along fucking great. He's glad to finally have a son to do guy things with since my sisters are super feminine.

>>7846210
no silly, daddy issues turn boys into trannies and girls into sluts.

it's mommy issues that cause ftms.

>>7846365
>>7846372
I also get along greatly with my mom.
Why is it so hard for some people to believe that trans people can come from perfectly functional families...

>>7846380
personal experience probably.

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>>7846372
lmao present top kek
>tried to convince myself for years I was imagining myself as the woman in femdom fantasies
>realized one day I was imagining being the dude

FUCK
>>7846210
>implying most dads wouldn't prefer a son to a daughter
>my dad had a harder time accepting I'm a gay guy than accepting I'm a trans guy


Have a great relationship with my dad, really grateful to have him.

>>7846297
Break the word apart. 'The rapey'

>>7846464
No, MTFs have the submissive fantasies. My OCD requires you to have dominant fantasies or things aren't mirroring.

Anyone got experience with DIY Testogel?

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>>7846765
Topical T gel sent me off the rails.
I was using it durring immigration because I could stockpile it by getting my doc to write me a retardedly high dose for a few months before I left the country.

Overall, I think my absorbtion and metabolism of it were both too fast. I would spike and crash daily. I was pretty fucking volatile on it. Screaming in traffic looney.

>>7846210
Projection.

That image isn't a "daddy", poster is undoubtedly a baby faced twink who wants his own daddy to put him over his knee for a good belting.

I just so happen to have a supple leather belt and a knee, babyfaced anon. I'm nearly 40, I could be your daddy, wee boy.

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>>7846372
>it's mommy issues that cause ftms.
DELETE DIS

>>7846380
perfectly functional families are a myth

>>7846807
>I'm nearly 40
wew

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>>7846829
You know 4chan has been around for about 13 years, right? I have been around off and on since it was "a new thing" I don't understand why old oldfags are so shocking.

>>7846850
I've been her for a decade, but I'm not 40.
I was mostly shocked because I know you are getting your degree. I thought you were Brooklyn's age.

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>>7846866
"Nearly 40" was intentionally vague
I figure, at 35, I am just as able to say that as "over 30", right?

I feel super old on here while people are griping about their parents and I am wondering about when I should get a new roof for the house. Not sure how old Brooklyn is, exactly, but his life and mine are pretty different.

>>7846885
35 isn't bad. You should say "in my 30's" or something instead of nearly 40. When I hear people say nearly 40 I always assume they're 43 and counting down.
Brooklyn just turned 30.

I think the age thing is very board spesific. I know /out/ and /diy/ have more older posters while here there's a lot of young people transitioning or getting into the gay scene. They tend to be younger.

>>7841415
>'happy life facts'
>just makes my life feel so much worse by comparison

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>>7846919
Don't be sad

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>>7846906
LoL I round up. "In my 30s" seems like it would get taken for 38ish anyway, I just admit to being an old fucker to get it over with.

I am on here because I dont talk about trans shit irl with folks. Really is a young scene though. Some of the asinine shit that gets posted makes my eye twitch.

>>7846963
Well you sound like an old fucker that's for sure. I agree with you that a lot of the stuff here is teenage whining so I'm glad you're present to keep some balance going.
What's occupying your creaking bones these days? Other than a new roof.

>>7846990
Renovations to the house in general.
New flooring, painting rooms.
Training the dogs to come in from the newly fenced yard without making me catch them and haul them in by the scruff. Fucking chowchows, man. Asshole dogs.

>>7847052
Post dogs

>>7846210
I'm a cis dude though. I just think FtM guys are really attractive.

>>7845538

i get being frustrated, but that doesn't make you less of a person or some shit, and it doesn't mean you can't have a good time with a chick and vice versa... there's plenty of stuff you can do sexually that doesn't require a dick

sex is important to me too so i get you, but that's why i'm telling you that you're placing too much weight on what you don't have and not focusing on learning to work with what you've got...

at least you can recognize that you're letting your insecurity cloud the way you're thinking... better than being totally unaware

hope the appointment goes well

>>7845818
>>7845929

that's pretty fucked, sorry to hear that... specialists are hard when you've got shit insurance though, i know that searching for neurologists, gastrologists, and pain management shit... any chance you can travel a little to get to one in your state or are you just fucked on that?

you're still you btw... being trans and transitioning isn't you living a lie or something, it's you getting treatment for what you have... and setbacks don't change that, however inconvenient and painful...

>>7846885

our lives are different? since when?

>>7846919

i would hate babysitting pandas honestly... especially that many

>>7846866

never really too late to educate yourself in a formal setting ... there's people in their 60's who go get degrees and shit

>>7846906

i'm more like about halfway to 31... my bday is at the end of august (23rd)

>>7846963

most of it just makes me laugh... when this general first started the average age was 24 and a lot of people were somewhat older... i'm friends with one of the old tripfags from here (cisguy though) and he's a year older than you...
it's just gotten younger

>>7847338

sure you are, lesbian...

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Soo.. marketing for men.
Someone in the business told me that body care products for men are more likely to contain harmful stuff that mess with your hormones because, and I quote, "men don't care", while women's products get harmful stuff removed immediately when it's discovered because women read labels and are conscious of stuff like this.
I don't use or give a shit about products but is this something to be concerned about? Marketing for men is all about black and blue, and macho fancy names, like we're all 12yo. I kind of agree with her that most men don't give a shit, or are taught to not give a shit, but at the same time most harmful habits get associated with masculinity and seen as a badge of honor for men, probably contributing to the lower life expectancy and cancer risks.

Any other traps I should know about? Male-defined clothes being lined with anthrax or something?

>>7847387
explain gay/bi ftms

>>7846198
Top surgery generally fixes that.

>>7847506
Hm, never heard of that.
I know with products with both a male and female spin, usually the ingredients are nearly the same, it's just the perfumes and dyes that are different (and packaging).
Maybe this is a thing with products that are only used on men.

>>7847542

it was a joke...

i'm a bi transguy... i don't give a shit what someone is, people of either gender can be attractive and i don't care if someone is trans or cis... also don't care about shit like race/ethnicity...

sexuality is separate from being trans... it's that easy to explain... if all transpeople had one specific sexuality it'd change the nature of being trans i imagine, but that's not the case...

>>7847547
I choose my products based on how they smell. My shower gel smells like victory.

>>7847586
That would be the foot fungus

>>7847586
I like collecting different products that smell good and I use whatever one I want to smell like that day. So my bathroom is full of various soaps and body washes.

>>7847586

i typically buy all natural shit cuz i'm a faggot like that... i only care about the way something smells if it's unpleasant

>>7847599

i couldn't do that... i'd spend way too long trying to make a decision and showering would take forever and half that time would be me deciding what to use...

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2 weeks on T here, just did my second shot a few hours ago. I work nights ans usually am dead asleep at this time. Anyone notice a change in sleep habits/ energy level/ insomnia related to T or the shot cycle?

Do you wear cologne?

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>>7847725
Only when fancy... or if no access to shower/tub/catbath

>>7847665
Hormones affect sleep cycles. It's more likely that the change is doing it, rather than the T itself. That being said, I'm pre-t so don't listen to me.

>>7839777
I have one since I was 17.
Grows fast, the problem is that the faster it grows, the less hair I have on the head

>>7847764
If you push it back in it will pop up on the top

>>7839777
I'm 9 months on T and have a patchy neckbeard, shitty mustache, and sideburns. They don't connect yet.

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>>7847071

>>7847383
>our lives are different? since when?
Since the doctor dangled you at birth and your parents argued over which of them would be the first one to strike you, I'd wager.

LGBT is a "newer" board, relatively speaking, isn't it? I think it came about the same time as /news/ ... I was just a /b/tard for the longest time so I didn't really track demographics.

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>>7847948
>floofyness intensifies

>>7847948

that's a lot of fur...

nah they didn't argue they flipped for it... couldn't tell you who won i don't remember a first time

this board is... 4 years old i think? pretty sure it started the year my health went to shit and i tried to hang myself (not in that order) ... same here though started on /b/, i've been on/off 4chan for the past 12 years or some shit

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>>7847599
I can't juggle fragrances like that. I get dematitus flare ups on my upper arms and shoulders as if someone burned me with cigarettes. Then I itch for weeks while I use the most bare bones soaps until it clears up.

My splurge soaps are sappo hill stuff... some hippy soap that look like flamboyant hockey pucks. Their almond, and lavender soaps have a good smell, oatmeal smells like cinnamon and is goid if you dont like loufas or poufs, and the aloe one is meh.

I found that "kiss my face" brand again, so that is my soap when fragrance allergies act up. Smells like a musty old house, but is literally just: olive oil, salt, and water... so I can deal with that trade off.

>>7848041
>this board is... 4 years old i think?
Yeah, baby board.

/b/ 's userbade is even younger now, I think, maybe it is because I cannot understand the ever changing meme lingo. It is like when my classmates say something and I have an old man moment, "wtf is fleek? dabbing? that sounds like treatment for anal fissures"

I am often the class grandpa.

>>7848120
Board age is user turnover, not just how long it's existed. /soc/ is older than /lgbt/ but its turnover rate is very short for the majority of posters.

>>7847052
chowchows are huge assholes

I'm actually dealing with similar stuff. Have to get a new carpet & toilet in the master bedroom so I can rent it out. Thinking of the other repairs I'll need to get done to sell the house in a couple years. Training a doodle puppy. I'm going to have to build a dog run for him this summer.

>>7848120

i haven't looked at /b/ in years... i'm sure it's full of younger people though, not surprising

i chill with people who range from 20- 60's so i'm not usually lost with shit like that... and people usually think i'm a lot younger than i am so idk what it's even like to be treated like an adult... i imagine it's gonna be weird as fuck the day that happens

>>7848156

the fuck is a doodle?

>>7848185
labrador + poodle

>>7845820
Thank you.
I can travel, but really I live close to one of the bigger cities in my state. It's a new problem for me; I've always been on my dad's insurance which was pretty good. Now I've had to go on Medicaid. It pays everything, but very few doctors take it. I'm very fortunate my Endo is still seeing me.
I know this will pass. I've got a family and doctor who are all very supportive. It's just easy to get real bummed out with all this BS going on at once.

>>7845820
>>7848241
Whoops!
Replied to the wrong post. That post was meant for you.

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>>7848249

>>7848156
>chowchows are huge assholes
They can be, mostly it is that they don't emote strongly. Like, tail wags are rare and not easily noticed in the floof. They have resting bitch face. They don't vocalize much compared to other dogs, and they dont pin their ears back as often... so people misread them.

I am used to my boys, so I can tell their body language pretty well. They're chicken shits, but the blond tries to act tough with strangers, so I gotta watch him. His little brother is a clingy suck up who warms up to strangers pretty quick. Blondie likes girl dogs, thinks he is casanova. Male dogs kick his ass on the regular, although once a fight gets serious he goes snake and has whupped dogs bigger than him. He is just submissive and cannot communicate it well.

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If I go studying botany for kicks, how likely to land a qt3.14 botanist chick who can grow me fruit trees?

Rate plan pls

>>7848191

oh... seems like a weird name for that combo...

I've had enough of seeing middle aged tits at the gym, bros.

>>7848397
Full name is labradoodle

>>7848398
stop hanging around with fat middle aged men

>>7848185
>>7848191
He's actually Golden Retreiver + Poodle so he's technically a golden doodle, but I don't call him that because he's pure black, not a spec of the golden coloring in him. I'd post a picture but he's still so young he doens't stay still long enough to snap pics

>>7848328
Yeah, all dogs are going to have their own personality. Chows are easily inclined to becoming anti-social as a breed but it'll depend on the dog

>>7848387

10/10 but i'm bias and love botany... i read botany textbooks and shit on my own so...yeah

>>7848411
Middle aged women, my lad.
>tfw girls are prudes while old ladies strip down and give daily shows
I didn't ask for this.

>>7847665
For me after starting T, I've found that during the day I've got more energy than I know what to do with, but at night I crash HARD.

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>>7848439
Any milfs?

>>7848421
If I end up buying a farm you, the s/o and birdies can come live here and you can grow whatever you want. Deal?

>>7848415
Puppy! pics pls. Glue him to the floor or something so he stays still.

>>7848403

oh... i don't care for big dogs personally so i know fuckall about most of them

i have a jack russell (well technically he's a family dog now, he's been living with my family since i was 19) who's turning 15 soon... he's the biggest and smallest i like a dog to be...

>>7848415

damn that high energy? you gotta get a pic while he's sleeping... what's his name?

>>7848466

sounds good...

>>7847764
dude, finasteride + minoxidil + nizoral

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>>7848466
>>7848484
His name is Theo

The only time he sleeps is when we put him in a kennel at night and put blankets over the top to make it insulated and dark. I have no idea why this is the only way he will sleep, he's like a bird or something, gotta cover the cage.

I had my brother hold him down for a pic

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>>7848633
Based pupper is based. Awesome.

>>7847725
Not cologne but more like a body spray. I don't like the intensity of cologne.
Very feels-good-man when a girl catches a whiff of it and just says "oh fuck you smell good" in that hungry tone.

>>7848439
>tfw no hot cougar domme
One day.

>>7848633

he's cute... weird that you gotta put him to bed like a bird though

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>>7848633
Could you use that thing as a lifehack? use the kennel to turn the puppy into off mode when he gets too energic or something?

Is it weird that lately I've become obsessed with buying bulk hair from chinks and hoarding it? I have no idea why, but I love having different colours and textures, and I keep them all tidy and packed in my wardrobe. I don't even do anything with it, but I need to buy and possess it. Sometimes I think, am I going nuts?

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>>7848929
>bulk hair

>>7848938
Bulk hair is basically a severed ponytail. Not extensions or this shit, and you buy it in large amounts. A kg or so. Of course it's all human.

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>>7848961
May I borrow one to use as a bib? I have some gourmet b8 to eat.

>>7848968
A bib?

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>>7848970

>>7848984
Having a baby suck on a chunk of human hair?

>>7849012
Yes

>>7849020
Not wasting expensive shit in a kid's mouth, use synthetic fibers

>>7849035
Value is in the eye of the beholder.
Have you ever masturbated with them?

>>7849040
Value is in how much money I waste on it, or maybe if it's in the eye of the beholder and you don't care for it, buy it for me?
No, but I do sniff it.

>>7849045
>I sniff it
Go on....

>>7849047
No. Buy your own hair to sniff and wrap around your dick. Unprocessed, virgin hair.

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>>7849058
>Not buying pure wizard hair
pleb

>>7848929

do you really gotta ask if buying bulk hair just to have it and sniffing it sometimes is weird? no shit it's weird...

>>7849377

+ if you ever ask a question that starts with "is it weird if" then chances are the answer's gonna be "yes"

>>7849377
But it's not even a fetish thing, I just love the feel and smell of hair... the shine, all of this. Even my own.

>>7849876
>not even a fetish thing
Dude...

>>7849876

it'd be less weird if it was a fetish thing... just saying

>>7849876
>put the lotion in the basket

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I've been playing video games all day, forgot how good wind waker was.

>>7846094
>puck
>Not a fuckable elf

>>7847383
I forgot we had the same birthday, cozy.

>>7847725
Yep, I like fresh woody scents. Hate shit like axe though, mom got me a bathset of it when I came out.

>>7848929
I buy hair too, but for doll costumization and shit, not because I'm secretly a reverse Buffalo Bill. It is nice to touch, I'll give you that.

How did your clit fare when in the first weeks on T? I did my 4th shot today and that thing has become fuckhuge and sensitive as hell.

>>7849969

never really got into wind waker... last time i played a loz game it was majora's mask

too bad you aren't close, we could celebrate together...

>>7849876
That's generally how a fetish starts, babe.

Did the ratio of men to women and how masculine certain jobs are seen ever effect your decision with what career to pursue?
Currently working towards something that isnt known as a women's job but is one of the very few stem fields where women dominate and I am considering following my other options instead which are the exact opposite partly because of this.

>>7850112
How is it a fetish if there is no sexual desire whatsoever behind it? It's a fascination with keratin fibers and how beautiful they can be, the geometry of curls, the color nuances, the distinctive smell..

>>7850231
Technically a fetish is just an obsession, just with how humans are, it usually develops into something sexual.

Just sayin, if you're sniffing the hair one day and find yourself getting a stiffy, don't say we didn't warn you.

>>7850124
Not really, my major is something that's pretty 50/50 in gender.
I really should've gone into Math, which is generally a more male-oriented field, but that wasn't influenced by my own gender or anything.

>>7849992
Lucky.
I only got an increased sex drive. My minidick hasn't grown or gained any sensitivity while on T; shots or gel.

>>7848929
what the actual fuck

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>check thread
>"I just love the feel and smell of hair... the shine, all of this. Even my own."
>leave thread

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>another binder day
Aanother sausage cat created
wake me up

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I'm in one of those moods right now where I wish I could cry and have that make me feel slightly better but can't because T suppresses it. It's amazing how some types of music and feel so happy and comforting when you're in love but then become completely soul destroying when you're alone. I feel like I'm going to be miserable and alone forever.

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>>7851981
Don't be sad.

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>>7851988
I've been single for 3 years and I'm still in love with someone who will never love me again because of something I can never go back and do over again. No matter how hard I try to get over it and move on my subconscious betrays me in my dreams. I have no family because they're evangelicals who would rather just throw me out like I never existed. I'm slowly getting back on my feet, but the longer I go the more cynical and jaded I get. How the hell can I not be sad?

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>>7852026
If you are slowly getting back on your feet then your situation is improving. Look at it positively; it will only get better slowly and steadily. You will hit landmarks and achievements and celebrate the little things. It's in these periods in life we meet new people and create strong bonds. You will find someone new soon, and put the other person behind you.

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>>7852034
Hey, I'm not some fag that sits around all day listening to sad music. I just happened to come across some songs on YouTube that really gave me a strong sense of the feels.

>>7843338
Why are you trying to pitch upward? Are you trying to hide your transition for now?

On T since August here; and yes, the new chest vibration is really weird. It took me by surprise - I'd never seen anyone mention it before. It took several weeks for it to stop weirding me out every time I spoke, but I DID eventually stop taking notice of it.

My voice is still scratchy though...hard to describe, but I can't make it "smooth," plus it squeaks tons. I know the squeaking will eventually stop, but I hope I can make the sound smoother too eventually.

>>7843524
That guy isn't just being unreasonable. He's in a fucking cult.

I'm saying this from experience as an ex-SJW, I really believe it's basically a soft cult that no one more sane is acknowledging because they still have to virtue-signal like tards. SJWs recruit people similarly to cults, isolate them, make them dependent on other SJWs/the culture and control them similar to cults.

When I "left" SJWism, I had a lot of similar symptoms to people who leave cults...really insane mood swings, crazy crying jags for absolutely no reason at all, homicidal rage fits, hypersensitive in general, "voices" in my head repeating SJW ideas over and over and telling me to go back, a lot of guilt for being weak enough to be caught by them, fear that I was going insane.

The anger at being lied to and betrayed by these people is going to be something I carry to my grave.

Don't try to "empathise" with this guy, that's how they prey on you. Trans people are great targets for this shit - the "carrot/stick" SJWs use here is, "don't you want to be a good person/you don't want to hurt other oppressed people, right?"

Don't fall for it.

>>7844432
Why wouldn't you? I ripped my eyebrows out in the past, they grew back.

>>7845178
You'd think a trans guy would know better than to think all women want a massive schlong tickling their guts. Stop watching porn.

>>7845877
I've been binding WAY longer than that. What are you using?

>>7852055
>Hey, I'm not some fag that sits around all day listening to sad music.
Sheesh, bystander caught in the crossfire over here.

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>>7852039
You're acting like I don't realize things will get better when I myself acknowledged that it is. I know that financially my position is improving, seeing as I'm getting hired into a supervisor position next month when I was homeless a year and a half ago. Obviously I'm moving up the ladder. It still doesn't change the fact that as time goes on I become more jaded and cynical. Besides that all you're doing in preaching to the choir and saying nothing helpful.

>>7852070
Creepin' me out now.

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>>7852113
Okay fuck me then I guess. All I'm saying is that the jaded part is a temporary processing. You will probably also go through an aggressive period where you're angry about the whole thing, but my point is it will end, and you will feel better after everything is more settled. Look forward to that instead of dwelling on your feefees. If you want hugboxing go somewhere else.

Shit will end, just keep grinding. And stop being a faggot.

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>>7845917
Thank you based cisbro

I have a question, how come cis guys ride bikes standing up? Every time I try I nearly fall off, does riding a bike while sitting on the seat seriously hurt your balls?

>>7852174
you must have some shitty balance

>>7845877
I have a friend who's been binding since he was 13 or younger and is now 16-17 and has deformed ribs. It's a possibility since you may have still been growing when you started but I'm not all that informed on the subject, just see a doctor if you have genuine concerns.

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>>7852148
I just don't know if I have it in me to be able to trust people again. Or if I'll be able to be happy again. I've turned down perfectly good people because I just couldn't make a connection, because nothing feels genuine anymore. Online dating has only served to make me feel worse, because it feels like everyone on there sucks but I still keep periodically checking it anyway even though I know I turned down friends who would've been perfectly good in a relationship. I don't know if it's just that my standards are too high because I'd previously been with someone for more than 4 years and was completely and absolutely in love with, or what else it could be. I know that its partially because even 3 years later I realize in the back of my mind that I still haven't been able to move on despite my best efforts. Or maybe it's that I have trouble settling with mediocrity or the idea of it. It's just hard to know what to do with myself sometimes.

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>>7852178
He knows what he needs to do

>>7852193
you're the one posting cutesy shit, so I'm not sure you're in any place to call someone a fag

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>>7846210
Was this trying to flirt? 'Cuz it's...a bad attempt.

>You need daddy dick.
LOL, no. I need subby dick. Put on pic related and maybe we'll talk.

>>7850231
Mild trichophilia here, and you sure as fuck sound like a latent hair fetishist to me.

I don't want to, like, rub my junk with hair, that shit's creepy. But I will NOT get with anyone if I couldn't stare at the back of their head for hours.

I have dozens of gifs saved of people tossing their hair and shit. Good hair movement and texture is god-tier attractive features; I don't care about pleb shit like your lips.

>>7849992
Slight growth, but I also applied E because I was vacillating wildly on wanting downstairs growth...I finally decided to just stop that and let whatever happens, happen.

Decreased sensitivity, but that's a plus to me. Made it so much easier to fap.

>>7852202
>LOL, no. I need subby dick. Put on pic related and maybe we'll talk.
I need to hear more.

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>>7852191
Online dating is a shit. Go do proper socialization. That's how you find people.
If it that you lack closure with the other person or something like that? How can you move on, other than dating someone else?

>>7852201
Cats are badass manlets. They're inspiration.

>>7852202
Have you considered becoming a hairdresser or barber?

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>>7852179
>aggressively swinging from side to side when riding a bike is a normal feeling

>>7852099
>"voices" in my head repeating SJW ideas over and over and telling me to go back
What? No way.

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>>7852217
I know it's shit. Despite the fact that I periodically check it I don't think I ever really take it very seriously, but I do anyway. As for socializing I've got are my roommates (2/3 of them ignore that I exist most the time, bit occasionally indulge me in conversation. The other roommate is sort of like a half-brother since we share food and carpool and shit) and a bunch of college students that are all pretty much younger than me. I also do a lot of volunteer work, so really it's not like I'm never around people. As for dating I did get into a relationship once but dumped that person after two weeks because of that whole not feeling genuine thing. I felt like shit for dropping them like that but I just couldn't do it. Something's holding me back.

Anyways I don't think I'm going to get anything out of posting about it here so I'll just see you guys later.

>>7852219
You're not swinging your body you're swinging the bike. All you're doing is pushing the pedals and shigging the handlebars.

>>7852260
>Something's holding me back.
Sounds like you need closure.
Also >>7852247 this. See a therapist.

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>tfw I come from a family of 6'4 hairy gorillas
>tfw I can never feel manly around them (Except for my younger brother)
>tfw around everyone else I feel normal
>tfw actually average height for a man

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>>7852247
Few things to get out of the way
1. I'm stoned right now so I'm a little all over the place, I'm usually not an edgelord. I rarely if ever rant about shit on here like this.
2. I actually am starting to see a therapist. I started having some really bad depressive relapses after I spent Thanksgiving and Christmas alone, especially after I realized that not a single person called me on my birthday either. The concept of family and being with people you love during the holidays has always been important to me, but I don't really have family anymore. So anyways yeah I sought out help.

But yeah. Anyways I'm gonna go shoot some aliens now.

Are there any webcomics or anything similar about being FtM? Or that cover both FtM and MtF stuff?

>>7852293
yeah, there really isnt many comics about being ftm, and like >>7852307 said, the way theyre handled can be kinda weird. the only one i actually know that is about being ftm is http://www.roostertailscomic.com/ . its an autobiographical comic and the guy is pretty nice and a good person, but sadly gets a lot of sjw ideas pushed onto him because of it.
i remember there being another webcomic about a ftm werewolf, but i guess the author gave up on it and the site it was on is now for sale. its a real shame since it did actually tackle shit like coming out and getting on t and living in an unsupportive community pretty well.
theres also el goonish shive which i think has a ftm character who was going to be important, but i stopped reading right when he got introduced so i dont know how big of a role he has. also its 10+ years old and mostly deals with unrelated stuff.
for mtf comics the only one i know is assigned male, which is pretty much sjw preaching. it can have a comic with a good idea every once in a while, but its way too rare.

I'm curious. How many of you guys believe in biological sex and do you ever think you can really become a man if you're born female?

Even though I'm ftm and living as a man right now, I don't believe it is ever really possible to become the opposite gender from what you were born as. Naturally I can't say this in most lgbt communities/places because I would be eaten alive for it. I don't think a man or woman is based on clothing, interests, etc. but rather just your genetics, which is why you won't see most women above 6 foot or a man ever give birth. I would kill to have been born male but I wasn't it and I don't think I'll ever be able to truly believe I'm as much a man as a guy who was.

>>7852418
i pretty much agree with you, yeah. i dont think its really based on genetics though, at least not as much as you do. its more about how were always going to feel like theres something missing, no matter how much we transition or fit into society. for some it might be physical, for some it might be based on genetics, like you said, and for some it might be just about the fact that they never got to have a real male childhood the way other people did. well never "really" be men because well always be missing something other men have.

>>7852418
I agree with you. At best we will be dysfunctional pseudo-males, but that's the only choice we have. I would kill to be cis, but that's not going to happen. My DNA will always laugh at me and external hormones will always be an extra risk on a bio-female system.

But as far as medical conditions go, It beats being paraplegic or having downs. I guess.

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>>7852418
>>7852441
adding to this, it's not like we are women either. We are defected human beings who needs some repair work done. It won't be perfect but at least it's better than to be thrown away like garbage.

>>7852418
i just shrug and hope for the best, just trying to get on with my life works better for my mental health than letting myself get caught up in philosophical spirals

>>7852418
I know I'm not cis and I know that I'll never be. And it's not that I don't care because of course I do, but it's not something I believe I should be stressing about. Yes, I do believe you can become a man even if you weren't born with a dick. It's a state of mind and how you carry yourself.

Do I believe most of the ftms currently running around are men? No. Too many pussies and too much SJW garbage.

>>7852418
We're on the same page. And I prefer to be stealth, you know? Being the disgusting straight white male, #1 public enemy and root of all things evil. Don't even give a shit if that puts the whole LGBTQ sjw soup against me.

>>7852418
>I would kill to have been born male
>>7852441
>I would kill to be cis,
I think the distinction here is important: to "be" or to "have been born".

Being cis is getting perfection. The exact life you know you want.

But having been born cis means losing all the experiences you had. They may have been miserable and the alternative may be what you wanted, but without the experience of having been trans you'd appreciate being cis the way any cis person does, not the way you would if you got to somehow become cis now.

If wouldn't even really be you. It would be be whoever you would have grown up to be had you got the life you wanted. He might be nothing like you would be as a man. He's a stranger who happens to have been given your family and most of your genes.

>>7852554
I would kill for both to be completely honest

>>7852592
But why go for the being born? That's giving up everything about who you are. It's asking to be replaced by someone who gets to be cis.

At that point they don't even need to be a cis male. They could be a girl and cis. Then they get to keep all of your body instead of being a natal male you, and they get the very same gendered experiences, except they don't find them dysphoric.

Or there could be no-one, you could just not be. Which I guess is my point, wishing for a cis you to have existed instead is the same as just wishing not to have existed, never mind if anyone does instead.

>>7852418

someone trans always stays trans regardless of what hormones they take... i thought that was a given... and well no shit interests and clothes have nothing to do with anything... idk what there is to argue here, of course hormones don't make someone cis...

>>7852554
>>7852598

that's all very philosophical, but people are more than the sum of their experiences... there's a base personality in addition to the shit that happens (people are roughly 50/50 nature vs nurture)

yeah they'd grow up and be different if they were them and had been cis, but no one who says that is thinking about 50% of who they are being gone... just the rest of it... and the entire point is that they'd be different anyway rather than who they are with all the experiences of being trans... it's a matter of not wanting or valuing the product of being trans in their case, it's not like they're necessarily better off...

and it's like someone saying "i wish i was never abused" or "i wish that never happened" at any point in their lives... you'd always end up with a different result changing one thing... but the idea is that the base is the same and the different experiences create a better end result...

>>7852598
>But why go for the being born? That's giving up everything about who you are. It's asking to be replaced by someone who gets to be cis.
Nope. I would be the same guy, a bit different, just with correct bits attached.

>Or there could be no-one, you could just not be.
>is the same as just wishing not to have existed

You moron. People are more than a trans-tag. I am me, and would still be me. Quit assuming being trans is like an insane butterfly effect for someones life.

>>7852621
>>7852598
>>7852554

+ in the hypothetical situation their consciousness remains the same, just through different experiences... and it's that consciousness that they're valuing, not the experience of being trans...

sure experiences affect who a person currently is, but there's more to anyone than where they've been... and growing in a different manner with a similar base is the desire when people say that...

>>7852404
What was the name of that autobiographical one where the guy got a job in the service industry by going full girlmode everyday?

>>7852622

i get where they're going, i just don't 100% agree and know what people mean when they say "i wish..."

they're not entirely wrong, they're just not entirely right either... who people are is both nature and nurture and the way your brain develops can be affected by outside circumstances...

what they're essentially saying is let's say someone is introverted cuz they're trans and as a result they stay home a lot instead of hanging out with friends... they're home a lot and as a result they start to find things that occupy their time so they get really into drawing (let's say cis them draws too, but not as much cuz they're out having a life... they're still the same in the sense that they have a natural inclination towards art but one of them takes it further) their brain will develop differently than the person who's going out and interacting with someone else... like the way something like music can affect a person with a brain injury in a positive way whereas a person with that same brain injury who doesn't get some kinda music therapy will heal differently... you get something different afterwards even making the slightest changes...

someone who might be afraid of sex wouldn't be, that'd change things too...

at the same time i know you're talking about base consciousness and a person's inherrent nature remaining the same and being shaped by other experiences... and you're not wrong in saying that the base of who you are would be the same and you'd still be you in a sense...

so technically you're both about half right... and i think they just kinda miss the point when people say "i wish"

>>7851753
Plebes don't appreciate finer things in life

>>7852645
True. I see your point. It would have been very interesting to experience it just to see what would happen, and when i reached my current age I could regain my memories from the previous trans life so I could compare them.

>>7852674

yeah... that'd be pretty cool, or even just having something like the "what if" machine in that episode of futurama... where you could ask it hypothetical questions and see the result play out...

i think the only thing i find comforting about not being cis is that i don't have any bastard kids... especially cuz i love crazy chicks and if that stayed the same but i could knock one up by accident... christ that'd suck

>>7852694
One thing that messes with my head is if I had been born cis then I would have been admitted in the army when I applied. They would have paid for my degrees with full salary meaning I would have paid down a house by now. I would also have been sent to Afghanistan and been a veteran today.
They refused me because I was afab.
Part of me is glad today, because I would probably gotten callous and changed if it had happened, and I love being an unpractical flimsy shit. At the same time it was a great opportunity and loads of guys in my generation lived through it. At the very least every cis guy my age has been in the military, even if they didn't see action, because serving is mandatory here. When I start passing I will inevitably be asked why I didn't serve. Oh well.

>>7852418

This is where I find distinguishing sex from gender to be useful. I know "gender is a social construct" gets a bit of flak on 4chan, but I think it's the simplest way to think about it if you just file the neurological aspects of it under 'sex' and keep 'gender' as strictly cultural, but semantics.

Your biological sex can never completely change, but the social role you hold in society will absolutely change when people perceive you as male. So at the end of the day, what does it matter than your bone structure, fertility, genitals etc are different? That shit will only come up in very specific scenarios, how can they possibly outweigh the fact that any stranger on the street will assume you're male and treat you accordingly? So in my view, even if you're not male, for all intents and purposes you're nonetheless a man. Getting more specific about that is just nit picking about something that really doesn't matter all that much, it's not as if men and women in our society go through sacred coming of age rituals that make crossing the line some insane sacrilege, I don't see the big deal.

>>7852745

i get that, you missed out on a defining experience that you would've otherwise had... and one that everyone else your age/gender will have... which is weird

though you wouldn't necessarily have become hard from it... not all soldiers do... one of my uncles was in the air force during vietnam and he's an old hippie type now who's really laid back and not at all like that... he was a cop too after the military... doesn't at all seem like the type... it's funny actually i have all these baby pics of cops holding me and shit and grew up with a lot of that precinct being around me and now if anyone ever got a pic of me with a cop it'd definitely me having a bad time...

i know i wouldn't have bothered with the military regardless cuz i wouldn't have to... my s/o on the otherhand would've probably done it right out of hs (he actually did start the enlisting process anyway... but didn't go the whole way with it, though that was a matter of life circumstances), but it's different here... pretty much every guy i've grown up with never enlisted... i know one marine i went to elementary school with and that's it...

>>7852789
You being related to cops is ironic as hell.

You're right though. I wouldn't necessarily become a hard person or anything, but now I'll never know.

>>7852837

i'm actually really close to that uncle funny enough... he's my godfather and he's always taken that really seriously

but he's actually a bit of a black sheep on my mom's side having been a cop and whatnot... he had a job at one point working for the da and had to lie about family history to get it... he actually came across all of my great uncles' mug shots while working... nothing major just shit like illegal gambling and petty theft...

>>7852847

+ you might be better off not knowing... but i suppose you'll never know that either

>>7852847
That's cool. Considering how your family is, it's great that you've got at least one person there.
Your family is involved in drugs too? I thought they were strict Catholics?

>>7852856

well we talk a lot, but i only see him a few times a year he's in italy... and my mom's side of the family has/had some drunks and theives but that's about it... but there's a point where some of that is just part of italian culture at that time in brooklyn (like my great grandmother running numbers for the mafia and shit) which is separate from the catholic shit... they just do what they do during the week, go to confession, say a few prayers and go to church on sunday... on my dad's side i've got an uncle who everyone pretends doesn't exist who's on hard drugs, a couple alcoholics (both my grandparents were on that side and aunts and uncles) and my dad used to be heavy into coke but he pretends that never happened (i only know cuz of my s/o's uncle, him and my dad used to hang out and do that shit together)

the level of religion varies depending on the family member, my mother's side is more open minded generally... my dad's side is more uptight (and more hypocritical) and he's more religious than my mother... so i grew up getting the shit beaten out of me if i didn't wanna go to church or sunday school or said i didn't believe, but other shit went on separate from that... and like obviously a lot of shit like anti-lgbt sentiment was a thing... especially when i was growing up, a lot of my family has loosened up as time has gone on and lgbt issues and rights have become more of a thing...

being catholic doesn't equate with being virtuous, there's plenty of hypocrisy there...

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>>7852888
>my great grandmother running numbers for the mafia and shit

>>7852888
I didn't imply they were virtuous, I just thought it meant that they upheld the law. My bad.

If they've loosened up in time, do they accept you being trans now?

>>7850124
When I realized I was a dude in highschool, I felt more confident studying comp sci. Though it was more because it was a field where I could be a hermit, and make a fuckton of money for doing so.

> tfw working full time now, spending my days coding alone in a private office/converted storage closet, and making that promised fuckton of money

>>7852904

she's been dead a long time, don't think it counts considering my family has no ties like that anymore since all of the ones who did are dead... my dad's side has a more interesting criminal history especially a second cousin in particular...

>>7852919

oh nah... at least not plenty of them with laws and shit...

my mom's side does accept me, and so does my mother... my dad's side is varied (some of them say they do to save face and seem progressive cuz they're crazy about blood ties... everything with them is "blood this and blood that", but i have a few people who actually are accepting on that side... but they're not generally accepted by the weird core group of family on that side... they're fucking weird i removed myself from that side at 13 cuz i couldn't fucking stand them) and my father doesn't at all...

but i'm not real close to a good deal of my family... never have been...

>>7852946

studies say it's roughly 50/50 nature and nurture... just saying... but half is a good chunk of a person...

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>>7852960

>>7852955
>especially a second cousin in particular...
Storytime pls

>>7852971

well...my dad's half cuban, and he's on the cuban side of the family... never met him, my dad did once at my grandfather's funeral (i never met my grandfather, he died when i was 5 never made an effort with anyone... he left 6 kids behind in cuba and 7 in brooklyn to go live in florida... he only had some contact with my dad cuz my father was named after him... actually tried to kidnap my dad when my dad was little... picked him up from school and tried to bring him to florida) anyway the guy was a communist spy who infiltrated lockheed martin to investigate bombings in havana that were thought to be related to the us... him and his wife got caught... i'm not sure if they're out of jail at this point or not, i think they are by now...

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>>7852977
Why did he try to kidnap your dad?

This shit is interesting. Got any more stories?

>>7852989

cuz my dad was the only kid of his that he wanted cuz of the namesake thing... him and my grandmother weren't together, she had all their kids... he was a bad alcoholic i imagine he thought that shit was a good idea

i don't really know much more about my family in cuba or anything... that was like some big secret on that side or some shit

idk shit about my grandpa on my mom's side and his family... i was close to him, but he wasn't close to his family and he used to just like to make up crazy stories mixed with the truth and tell everyone those instead of having serious discussions about his life... he thought it was funny mostly... for a huge chunk of my life and since he had gotten with my grandmother we celebrated his birthday on the wrong day cuz he told everyone his bday was in june "to make it easier to celebrate" since my grandmother's was... then around his 80th birthday he decided he wanted to celebrate it on the actual day so he told everyone the truth (we all thought he was kidding 'til he went and got his birth certificate and showed it to everyone) and we celebrated his birthday in july after that...
as far as i know i'm the only person in my family he ever sat down with and told anything to, and it was barely anything...

and i know fuckall about my dad's mother she died right around when my parents found out they were having me...

>one month on T
>sir'ed on the phone
>never trained my voice
Feels good lads.

>>7853559
>answer phone
>it's rajbeet from deepest darkest delhi
>"hello my name is james from microsoft is that mr [father's surname, pronounced horribly]
>"yeah sure that's me"

>talk politics while getting my hair cut
did i just fuck up
have I sinned against some barbershop code i have yet to absorb

>>7853875
It really depends on the barbershop.

>>7853875
only if they disagreed with you
but if that's the case, they have scissors in their hands and you are powerless

>>7853875
>talking while getting your hair cut
Yeah you fucked up

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I am gay. I am physically attracted to men. I become aroused by all aspects of their bodies, and develop deep affection and fulfilling love for them. I have sex with men, in every familiar way people have sex with one another. I have anal sex in both the active and passive role. I kiss other men, deeply, with full tongue. And this all nourishes and comforts my desires and makes me feel emotionally complete.


The idea of a woman filling that role is foreign to me. And picturing myself having any close relationship to a woman in this way makes me feel uneasy and uncomfortable as I instinctively reject any resemblance.


The idea of being with a ftm is revolting to me – on a level beyond my distaste for women in general.


I feel strange knowing this is how straight men must feel in reverse, yet they’re vilified for it by liberal people like me.

>>7854516
glad to know you felt the need to share this thought with a bunch of ftm

>>7854516
>inb4 mommy issues.

Personally I'm not into men, but if I was, I wouldn't mind if someone didn't want to hook up with me because of my parts. But to say that it's revolting and disgusting is a little bit too much.

Why do you feel this way so strongly? I hate women too, but not to this level... Any bad experiences with ftms, were you raped by a woman?

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Brooklyn's style of writing makes me skip over all his posts even though I see him everywhere. I'm sorry, I just.... can't take you seriously.... when...you talk like this.....

>>7854516
All this poetry over how you see FtMs as women.

clap clap

>>7854668
Pretty much everyone but new people and that one anon that wants to bone him ignores his posts for that exact reason.

Do you guys have any pet names for ftm HRT?

I know MTFs will call it Titty Skittles or Fem n Ms and I was wondering if FTMs had an equivalent like Mike & Ikes or something

>>7854746
I've avoided saying it for a while now because I didn't want to be rude, but I figured that completely ignoring all of his posts is probably more rude. Chances are that a heroin junkie doesn't have much of value to say, but I wouldn't know either way since I skip over everything anyway.

>>7854806
i've seen 'vitamin t'

pretty cheesy if you ask me

>>7854516
>tfw ftm whose slept with several self-proclaimed gay guys

devilish~