passing/unpassing stories

>be me
>not trans, but femboy
>just started crossdressing
>planning to go to halloween as little red
>decide to go out in regular (womens) clothes as a test run
>2am
>wearing bodycon dress, wig and 2inch red heels (only clothes I owned)
>as a guy, don't normally draw any attention
>step out of house
>walk for 30s and a guy starts crossing the street towards me
>OhShit, please don't talk to me, I don't have a girls voice, it's been 30 seconds, is it this bad for girls?
>He says "hi, can you tell me where the university is"
>we're stood in front of the university
>I just point at it, looking like a dog in headlights, and he eventually just walks into the campus
>carry on walking
>litterally another 30 seconds walking and a car pulls up next to me
>'oh, shit, is it seriously this bad, I can litterally still see my house and I've been pulled aside twice, am I going to get snatched or something? What do kidnappers do when they accidentally grab a crossdresser? If I'm lucky I'll get thrown out the car when he finds out I've got a dick.
>the door opens and a guy asks if I need a lift home
>I squeak out a 'no thanks' and carry on walking

I spent 2 hours walking after that, it was a scary night for me but those first 2 minutes I was not ready for

>>7453625
cute

I came out to someone as trans and they assumed I meant that I was a trans guy.

"Soooo... You want to be a boy?"

>>7453858
Well isn't that the most adorable thing I've ever read. We're they serious, how long did you know them before coming out

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>be 22 realize ftm is a thing
>initiate 24/7 boy mode, stop fighting facial hair
>cautiously approached by new co-worker, guy is ftm and asks if I am.
>tfw more experienced trans guy was unsure if I was trans or "just a swishy gay guy"
> get vouched for at informed consent clinic
>hormone hookup

...

>tfw meet gatekeeper GRS shrink, get asked "how long have you wanted to be a woman" by single most experienced shrink in capital city.
>feels good, bro

>>7453871
For a few months, she was a cis girl from my art class who I had become friends with. One day she asked me to come to yoga with her, and when I tried to be like "I can't, because of my body..." she was like "What? But you have the perfect body, you're not even a little chubby or anything", so I figured she must not know lol.

I went to yoga anyway, and if anyone clocked me they didn't make it obvious. Also she let me borrow her yoga pants because I didn't have any.

>>7453899
Were you post-op, I think yoga pants are a bit of a danger-zone otherwise.

>>7453933
>"I can't, because of my body..."
she obviously meant that she couldn't because she has a dick

>>7453933
No, I'm still not post-op and it's actually been really bad for my body. I don't know if I could pass in that situation anymore, maybe.

It was a pain having to make sure my penis was in check that whole time, but I managed, her yoga pants were kinda baggy on me.

>>7453946
Yeah, I should've really put 2 and 2 together there

>>7453953
What do you mean by being pre-op is bad for your body?

>>7453974
Because spiro is shit lol.

But yeah I was exaggerating, I still pass well, probably better since I put more conscious effort into my voice. A few months ago I had to stay in a psych hospital for like a week, so of course I looked like shit and didn't wear makeup and walked around in my PJs, and none of the patients clocked me. In fact I had to let the staff know about this 40-year-old guy who kept sexually harassing me. There were a lot of other more positive passing experiences, but they were probably just the same platitudes that a lot of cis women get.

>>7454088
Never even considered that AA's could be not perfect. Glad you're still passing well enough though

I'm only 3 weeks into HRT but passing without makeup is the dream

>>7454402
It's important to have frequent appointments with your endo to voice your concerns and check your blood levels.

Another thing to keep in mind is that there is a time and place for full makeup, a time and place for just putting on some lipstick and mascara, and a time and place for wearing no makeup. Even though I can pass without makeup, I obviously wouldn't go clubbing without it, and even though I think makeup helps me pass better, I'm obviously not gonna wear it when I go out to do laundry.

>>7454471
I'm self medding so no can do on that front. I'm going to pay for my own blood test at 6 months in I think but I have no complaints so far

>few years back
>gf introduces me to her parents
>gf didn't tell them
>I didn't know
>talk about summer plans
>"will probably be in bed most of the time cuz surgery"
>whattype.jpg
>confused
>ah so gf didn't tell you I was trans ?
>ah ok
>dinner goes on
>"sorry if I am too curious but how do they make a penis ?"
>"don't you think it's a bit too early for that you should live as a man for a while"
>wat.jpg
>turns out they thought I was some ftm
>they don't believe gf that I am not afab
>get rly confused about my old ID
later that day
>gf gets call from them
>"did your gf try to prank us today by pretending to be trans ?"

>>7453520
pretty sure I started this thread trend

it's my one achievement in this world

>only been on hormones for ~2 weeks, no big changes yet
>voice slightly lower, acne is starting, nothing big obviously
>practicing manwalk and man voice at mcjob
>stumping around like autistic toothpick gorilla
>generally not gendered at all
>some people go way out of their way to avoid using gendered language
>aggressively gendered male by angry old hick
>pretty sure he thinks i'm a trans girl

>later, different person
>can i get those dishes out of the way for you?
>"yes sir thank yo--"
>"uh"
>"miss"
>"uh"
>"yes thanks"

>feels good

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>formerly successfully stealth but gave up on my faggy 'girl' voice and cut my hair short (but clearly feminine) when i moved home since a lot of people know I'm trans anyways
>go christmas shopping wearing a dress and a big 'boyfriend' sweater over top with friend
>ask the woman at counter to recommend a scent for an older woman
>she recommends one but gets another woman to help me
>says something along the lines of 'sh..he needs help picking out a perfume for his grandma'
>rest of the conversation between the two uses male pronouns
>It's hot in the store so i take of my sweater revealing just my dress
>the he's become broken and uncertain again

Another time:
>day after i cut my hair short
>walking down the street talking to gf
>wearing a dress and full winter coat because it's cold
>drunk guy walks behind us and loudly asks 'why are you wearing women's clothing?' at me
>Just keep walking and say 'what?'
>gf says 'b-because she's a girl'
>guy walks past us turning a corner and gets a look at my face
>mutters something like 'oh what?'


Short hair and a man voice go a really really far way for getting clocked. I nearly never got clocked before. You other trannies better remember to do your fag voices.

>>7453520
>be ftm and pre t
>parents are super religious/transphobic
>get sir'ed in front of them a lot
>mom once confronted me about not correcting people when that happens
>just told her idc what strangers think
>everytime she talks to strangers she unnecessarily genders me as much as she can and as female
>people get rly confused and it's awkward af

>>7455011
she doesn't know i'm trans but she goes out of her way to inform everyone i'm not a guy

>>7454984
hair's rly important anon

i've seen a lot of males get confused as women just for having long hair so just grow it back

i'm ftm and i pass a lot less when my hair gets even slightly shaggy

>>7454984
Voice is almost always the most important thing for passing. If your voice is the only thing that's right, it won't help much, but if you are physically flawless but have a shitty voice, you'll still get clocked so hard you'll have trouble standing for a week.

My gf is cis, but she's 6'1, has wide shoulders, tiiiiny tits, a masculine build, and very masculine mannerisms. She has feminine traits too, but the result is a masculine-of-center androgyny. The only time she gets ma'amed is if they hear her voice before they see her (drive throughs, phone stuff, etc). If they hear her first, they keep calling her feminine pronouns, but if not they either call her sir or switch to awkward obviously ungendered language.

tl;dr voice is the most important part of passing and fucking work on it or you'll never pass

>>7454984
reminds me of one
>first time getting a feminine hair cut
>kind of self conscious walking out of the salon because of it
>walk a couple blocks to the store to buy something
>guy outside raising money for charity
>give him a $5
>"the young lady is most generous"

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>>7455030
Oh I know. I had some pretty gorgeous long hair for years. I started growing it out back in grade 9. But passing isn't really important to me right now since like i said a lot of people in my home town knew me as a male. I don't go a day without meeting someone from highschool.

My hair cut is really cute right now. Makes me look like a dyke which i dig. Maybe after voice surgery i'll get clocked less often.

>>7455031
True that. 'Gay tranny voice' isn't often good enough unfortunately though. When i was stealth i got clocked 3 times that i know of in 4 years and each time it was because my voice, even when i tried.

Also another way i've been clocked a lot lately has been on the phone.

Usually it goes like this:
>'excuse me sir but girl name has to deal with x sensitive info, could you put her ont he phone?'
>'uh that's me, I am on the phone'
>'uh ok sir'

or

>'is anon there?'
>'speaking'
>'uh... ok sir'

I think if there's a girl name on a document and the person says it's them you should switch pronouns but i guess that'd be lame for ftms.

>>7455031
>My gf is cis, but she's 6'1, has wide shoulders, tiiiiny tits, a masculine build, and very masculine mannerisms.

Are you dating my ex-gf? Fuck you, I'll never be little spoon again.

>>7455156
>little spoon all night errenight

feels great

>>7455138
Unfortunately true. It's usually better than nothing though. There's an app called Eve or something, the courses are like $5 each but I've heard some pretty great results.

>>7455352
What

>>7455637
Eve is for voice training.

>>7455736
Oh i could only find mentration aids.

I have a lot now. Being 18 and short is really nice. I should just go full time desu.
>walking out of sephora
>some salesman goes "hey miss, come check this out"
>shake my head and walk away because I'm too much of a pushover not to end up buying something.

>need to get more syringes
>put refill order in
>go to pick it up, also remember I need lube cause I'm out
>looking for lube
>end up stopping in front of the pregnancy tests because I can't find lube
>as I'm scanning the stuff in front of me some old guy walks past
>he gives me this awkward pity smile
>realize why and feel really embarrassed

>>7455736
Actually it's called EVA mtf
Eve is not even close

>go to outpatient psych program
>walk up to the front desk on my first day
>"oh hello sir, we'll need your keys"
>say hello, smile, hand over keys
>"what's your name?"
>tell them my female birth name
>they get really quiet and awkward, i have no problem with it
>go in for an extensive interview, the lady is awkward, i'm anxious because i have to tell her about how fucked up i am

>join my morning group for the first time
>introduce myself with my androgynous chosen name
>therapist, knowing my legal name, uses "she"
>group members use "he"
>just roll with it

>go for a few days
>be open about my girlfriend and involvement with lgbt people
>turns out three of the seven are gay or bi

>some people start to catch on that i'm not correcting anyone
>"casey, which do you prefer?"
>tell them i don't care, and i really don't
>they accept it and go with the flow
>some people use one and others use the other. nobody really seems to care that much because we have bigger fish to fry there
>feels good, man

i still don't know if i'm ftm or a really butch lesbian or if i'm a special snowflake nonbinary or what, but it feels good to have others be so lax about it, which is my approach

>>7456565
EVE, EVA, I was a letter off. There's EVA mtf and EVA ftm. One for each set of trannies.

>>7456610
That's how I feel about being mtf.
Pronouns are such a hassle and I'd rather people just be okay with me as a person.

>>7453858
Same except it was my gynecologist who were supposed to prescribe me hrt.
"when did you last have your period?"
"oh, I thought you were ftm."

>>7454927
>>aggressively gendered male by angry old hick
>>pretty sure he thinks i'm a trans girl
The best part

>>7454873
Passing stories precede /lgbt/

>>7457456
Let them dream

>>7457461
You're missing the point of the thread.

>>7455031
>6'1, has wide shoulders, tiiiiny tits, a masculine build, and very masculine mannerisms
Omg! So i can be a woman too!

>5'4", 4 months hrt
>still boymode, because family super religious
>aunt from out of state visits for christmas
>she hugs my siblings when she comes in, but doesn't try to hug me because she doesn't recognize me
>when I say hi aunty, she looks at me with shock

currently in my room, I think I hear my parents talking with her about me.

>>7457481
Have you even read further the first sentence in the post you replied to?
>no

>>7458987
Hope it ends good and they all will accept you. Please write an update later.

>>7456937
>Pronouns are such a hassle and I'd rather people just be okay with me as a person.
Yeah, me too.

I joined an LGBT club for a while to see what it was like, people asked me about my pronouns all the fucking time and it pissed me off. I felt like I had to choose a single set, when really neither are wrong, but neither is completely right either.

People will think less of you if you list every single pronoun you don't mind, so I just shrugged. The club wouldn't accept that though, so eventually I gave up and asked for gender neutral ones. They kept correcting other people unnecessarily, though, and it was just a real fucking pain in the ass. I hate this ultra-PC walking-on-eggshells identity-politics culture, people tried to fight on my behalf when there wasn't a battle in the first place, troubling everyone in the process.

I'm glad the therapy group accepted my "I really don't care," they show me actual respect and back off instead of intrusively demanding I tell them everything about the state of my dysphoria and transition. That shit is private, thank you very much, and I'm happy to go with how people perceive me because that doesn't define who I am. I don't need others to respect me to respect myself.

TL;DR: Being too anal about pronouns only causes trouble, so I prefer to go with the flow.

>>7460890
Shit i can relate to

Getting asked what your pronouns are all the fucking time is tedious and kinda makes me feel like 'what was the point in dressing as a woman anyways?'

It's even worse when you get someones pronouns wrong and become megahitler. If you didn't want me to mispronoun you as she than maybe you shouldn't present as a fem cis woman?!

>>7460898
At this point I don't care if I'm perceived as megahitler by them, they get too riled over small shit and take everything they disagree with (yes, EVERYTHING) as a personal attack. Then they'll at least avoid me some.

>>7457461
>>7457472
>>7457475
>>7457476
>>7457481
Samefag pls

>>7458987
last night, cont.

>go out of room to eat dinner with everyone
>aunt says I should cut my hair
>dad agrees, angrily says I look like a fag
>tell them I was just about to cut it anyways

I really don't want to cut my hair, but I'm afraid of what will happen if I don't

>>7462149
Don't do it anon your hair is precious.

>>7462149
My Dad sort of reacted the same way. I wanted to grow it our for the longest time but didn't really have a say till I was in my last year of high school because of how controlling my Dad is. Haven't looked back since desu. Just grow it out and don't give a fuck what family has to say, that shit takes a long time to grow. Don't let other people control your appearance. Unless you're related to a bunch of violent hicks, in which case you have my sympathies.

>>7462149
Aw. I was hoping it'll be better for you.
Idk maybe tell them "but girls like my long hair"?
I absolutely hated when I was being forced to cut my hair short in school by teachers.

>>7453897
>feels good, bro
I'd have totally clocked you, dude
*magic shaka ride*

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>>7462149
"jesus had long hair, i dont see why its an issue"

>>7453520

>be me
>15
>walking home from school
>little kid, 8 or 9 years old stops in front of me
>'are you a boy or a girl?'
>ignore him and keep walking
>secretly devastated
>girlfriend breaks up with me
>"you're too feminine"

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>>7465129
>getting mad at children
>not giving us enough context to know why you're upset about your situation

>Be me, friends with girl for a few weeks
>tell her a story about a trans guy friend of mine to break the ice/see how she feels about trans shit
>Tell her I'm in a similar boat to him
>get stopped
>"Don't say anymore, you are a beautiful woman and don't let anyone tell you otherwise"
>think that she's lying, but a sweet friend for caring about this young hon
>fastforward a few months later
>she calls/texts me angrily that I'm a liar and deserve every bad thing that happens to me
>"you said you were a real woman"
>go to work
>someone found out my legal name and told my friend when she asked for me
>tfw it turns out she thought I was coming out to her as FtM

or
>go to new doctor for HRT
>get pawned off on a nurse
>asks standard questions
>gets to "so when was your last period"
>super embarrassed
>"well...uhhh, I don't know...*mumbles*"
>gives me a look like I'm retarded
>"What do you mean you don't know?"
>"Well about that I'm actually trans"
>realization dawns on her face

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>>7453520
>be in uni
>5 mo HRT at beginning of semester
>was going to go full time but kept getting gendered male so gave up on it
>boymoded the rest of the way
>hardly talked to anyone and always went straight home
>end of semester
>cool guy in my art class who was always super nice to me asks me for my facebook
>start chatting up with him about the class now that its over
>he sees my prof pic showcasing my boobs and my pronouns
>"oh, so you ARE a girl, anon?"
>tell him im trans
>He tells me that everyone in the class already thought i was trans, but a transguy
>mfw my whole art class thought i was a transmale

thats a good thing, i think? maybe cause they thought i looked like a girl who dressed like a guy?

>>7466599
He probably just thought you were a guy with tits, that's why he assumed ftm

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>>7468158
you know i never thought about it that way but now i hate myself, thanks anon

>>7462149
I always tell them that i'm going to cut my hair bald and they stop talking about the topic.

>>7468950
Np