Best friend has feelings for me but..

OP you are the gayest straight man I've ever seen. If you're fine with him doing gay things to you then just be the bottom. I don't think he'll care if you don't want to fuck him in return if you're together. I think it can totally work if you are truly happy just being by his side. But you have to be 100% sure this is what you want. There's no turning back.

>>7335780
>Do you think I can make it work somehow..? I feel like if I lost his friendship over this I would kill myself
He won't leave you just because you can't love him the same. That being said, maybe you could work out a relationship where you two could be together and you have the freedom to date women.
>I can't love him like he loves me and I hate myself over it.
Don't underestimate the power of love, which can turn a straight man gay with time. Also don't hate yourself for being straight thats almost as bad as hating yourself for your race.

First just cause you don't return his love doesn't mean your friendship will die. It may be awkward for a bit but you'll both get over it and return to normal. Sounds like y'all both have an almost close brotherly-bond sort of relationship so don't fret about it being ruined because you would say no.
Second I really don't understand where you're getting at with this whole "physically" not digging him, like do you mean you think he's ugly or is it just the idea of boning a man not enough to get you hard?
Last you sound like a faggot. You said you would do anything but what's holding you back is this physical feeling, tbqh it sounds like you love him a lot and the thing is with love you can get over the big things like that.
I hope the best for you, I've been in that situation before as the dude asking his straight best friend and I was turned down. I still hold those feelings towards him as someone i would love to spend my life together with but I also treat him and respect him as my best friend first and foremost. Basically what I'm getting at is you will hurt this dude, he will get over it but deep down he's still probably gonna want you as a partner and more than a friend. But he'll get over it hopefully and things will be normal.

despite what the other anon says, there is turning back. its just like any other relationship, if it doesn't work, youd break up.

i understand how you feel. Friendship for me is more powerful than romance, and I'd much rather just live iwth a friend.

but sex would ruin that. have you tried talking to him about that? moving in together, separate rooms, and just being 'life partners' without the sex part?

you could fuck who you want and even date, but know that at the end of the day, its you two vs the world?

maybe it coudl work. i want to dream.

>>7335796
I am 100% sure I just feel guilty that I don't feel sexual about men so I can never return him feelings in the same way..

this is the most important question OP:

do you want to kiss him? doe sthe thought of you kissing him on the lips often make you happy?

>>7335810
There's more to love then just the sex. It sounds like you love him more than most people who are actually gay would love him. I think that's a different kind of special even if it's not purely romantic.

>>7335799
If I got together with him, I wouldn't sleep with anyone else. That isn't fair to him..is it actually possible for me to turn gay over time? That would be nice but I feel like it's chasing a dream.

>>7335801
You're right, our friendship would recover but even so I would hurt him a lot and that makes me really sad. I'm just being overly emotional right now.

I don't find men sexually attractive in general. He's not ugly or anything, but when I try to think of us having sex I get absolutely no arousal out of it. I actually feel a slight aversion to it but it's not something I can't get over I think.

>>7335809
He's not an open relationship type of guy, I can tell you that much. Plus I would dislike doing that if I were his boyfriend. I don't mind sharing a bed with him, it wouldn't be the first time.

>>7335812
Want is a strong word. I don't really want it but I don't think I would mind it. It makes me happy in that I'm happy he cares about me but I can't say I want it on a romantic level.

>>7335780
>my physical feelings don't feel the same.
You already answered your question right here. Been through the same shit. Felt as close as I could to my friend but they had feelings that were greater than mine was for them. Fucked and got it over with and realized we weren't meant to be. I don't talk to them anymore. It's sad but such is life.

>>7335875

>hes not an open relationship type of guy

this wouldnt be a romantic relationsihp.

one thing you gotta understand is that lifelong commitment DOESNT have to be romantic or sexual just becuase thats what marriage is.

on the island of Guam man was expected to pick his wife, but he was also expected to pick his 'best friend'. this was someone from childhood, and like a wife, there was a special ceremony to cement the bond.

these men legally (as far as 'legal' went on a pre-invasion tropical island) owned all of each others property. best friend was expected to use mens property as if it was his own. the two would walk down the street, arm and arm. it was a life long commitment.

what i mean to say is although he wants romance and you want friendship, you two can find the middle ground. sometimes men are meant to be life partners. it doesn't mean they have to have sex.

its not an 'open relationship'. its something that is both very ancient, but seemingly entirely new.

>>7335875
OP I think you should explain to him that you're open to doing it but explain to him your feelings and limitations. I think you're overthinking it and he would be okay with a slightly one-sided relationship. It's obvious that emotionally you're a complete fruit for him so that's all that matters I think.

This is utterly idiotic. If you can't be sexually happy with him, don't get in a relationship. I'm shocked at the answers here. It's so obvious: you don't romantically want him but you value him as a friend and he has to deal. Maybe that means not talking for a few months, maybe it won't take something that drastic, but either way don't get in a relationship with the guy.

Plus if he's the kind of guy who either HAS to have you as a boyfriend or he can't be around you at all, he sounds emotionally unstable and probably isn't worth shacking up with.

>>7335875
I think the power of love will conquer your sexual hurdle. Honestly though OP, are you really okay with taking it in the butt? It's not very pleasant if you're not gay. Have you ever tried butt stuff before?

>>7335936

dude, stop the wishful thinking.


we're all fags. we all fell in love with a best friend. we all wished he'd see the light.

but you're projecting that on to him, wishful thinking.

OP, if you arent sexually gay, don't do it. there are bonds stronger than friendship that dont have to be romantic. he can still be 'the one' without butt stuff.

>>7335908
I guess we could try that. Just living together would be nice too but his feelings aren't just going to go away. It might upset him if I date other people, I don't really want to upset him.

>>7335909
I guess I am pretty fruity for him. He's the most important person in the world for him but I'm not fruity enough sadly. I'll try talking to him about these things.

>>7335936
I've never done butt stuff before, I have absolutely no experience with that. I know I wouldn't like it though but I would be okay with giving it a go but yeah it would be painful.

>>7336043

upset him and ruin him are two different things. if you're a romantic person, you should explore that.

me im not so romantic. gay but im more like lesbians in the sense that i dont want to have sex with my partner.

ideally i just want to find a nice guy to live with, seperate bedrooms, and be each others first priorities.

but he can fuck whoever he wants and even date.

i could understand why your best friend woudl feel threatened. cuz whats stopping you from moving in with the girl?

the most important thing with lvoe has always been to feel like you are the most important person to them. even if a man and woman stopped having sex decades ago, woman still gets jealous... but she forgives as long as she knows she is the first priority and man stays with her.

>>7335780
Watch some twink porn, your inner gay will come free on his own.

>>7336043
Your friend is a really lucky guy, I think your devotion to him is really beautiful. Most cis guys would be immediately disgusted and hateful to their friend. I can tell you love him on a deep level, you're somewhere beyond friendship but not quite romance. What a lovely friendship.

you remind me of me and my best mate.

>3 years ago (almost to the day actually)
>id been checking out this guy working at the yogurt stop
>hes really hot
>overhear a lot of his conversations cuz im in full stalker mode
>moved out here to be an actor
>my roommate convinces me to ask him out
>i do
>'sorry im striaght
>totally awkward
>'i totally not creepily overheard you saying you want to be an actor. i write. lets collab'
>cast him in a web show i did
>he was so bad we had to replace him
>somehow still managed to hang out after that
>i have no idea why but he kept coming back
>our hangouts become basically therapy for oen another, mostly deep conversations
>three years later and were still great mates
>movie nights, dinner, trips to vegas
>after 3 years he gets a gf
>at first he ditches me more
>cancels plans at last minute to 'be a good boyfriend'
>comes over one night and i tell him how/why its hurting me
>hes surprisingly understanding
>i expect him to still keep up the pattern but he doesn't
>they've been together 9 months but other than the first two mishaps he has kept me a priority
>shes a total bro anyways so its pretty great
>lots of jokes about how shes just a female version of me tho (personality wise, not looks)

all in all its a good arrangement. obviously i dont have the love that OPs friend has for him, but its an itneresting dynamic that emerges when gay guys get close with straight guys.

>>7335810
>I just feel guilty that I don't feel sexual about men

There may be a solution to this OP

It sounds crazy, but hear me out:

>Furry porn

Start off with normal sfur. Stuff you probably already find hot.

From there, try some futa stuff. Just chicks with something extra.

Next, move onto the super twinky, practically still futa hard blush stuff.

Once you're there, you're golden. It's only a matter of time until you check out real gay porn, and then you'll want cock. 5 years ago I was straight as an arrow, and 2 years I downloaded Grindr out of curiosity. It was totally worth it.

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>>7335780

>>7335780
You sound like a faggot. We can't always get what we want. Trying to humor him out of your weird, desperate, clinginess would probably destroy your relationship. Just be honest with him as well as yourself.

You love him, you want him to be a part of your life forever, but you're not into dudes. Acknowledge his feelings, accept them, but don't lead him on. Chances are he's been wanting your ass for a while now, so nothing really changed. Knowing you're straight might just motivate him to look for romantic love and happiness elsewhere.

Have a non-sexual marriage.

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>>7335780
>I'm a 25 year old straight male
stopped reading there.
Here's your ticket.

OP are you sure you're not gay? You sound like you have a huge erection for him, then again I've never had a really good friend..

>>7336426
Not OP but is this a meme post? I'd like to know since I'm starting to have romantic feelings for my best friend as well. I don't think I could ever like furry shit but is there like some kind of hypno/subliminal-type thing to do this?

>>7335780
Cut him out of your life and stop seeing each other for a year then reasses if you really have feelings for each other

>>7339745
Because faggots are more divisive than straights!

>>7335780
Being attracted to someone's personality isn't enough honestly. If you seriously find the idea of kissing or being intimate with him unappealing enough, then don't lead him on. You say you're straight, but most of us see sexuality as a spectrum and being completely one thing isn't always the case. If you're that capable of passing on women and trying to be with a guy, then take it in baby steps. You just need to tell you're friend that this is new to you and be honest about your feelings. That way he doesn't get led on that you're as into it as he is.

>>7340995
Not even memeing dude.

Sexuality is super fluid, honestly. If you start sliding down the Kinsey slide with your porn it's an easy transition to IRL faggotry.

Idk if there's a set in stone routine or anything, but if you start jerking it to Bailey Jay, you'll start getting turned on by her dick, not just her tits and ass. It's about baby steps, kinda how people start getting into weirder fetishes because they start checking out weirder porn.

How many "furry turned me gay" or "I think I'm gay for traps now" have you seen on /b/? I know I've seen loads, you can't get on there without running into one nowadays.

There is some legit psychology behind this too - remember Pavlov's dogs? Classical conditioning. Because they got food when they heard the bell, they associated the bell with food, and their bodies would unconsciously start drooling when they heard the bell. You can train your body in the same way. If you start to associate dicks with hacking off and cumming, dicks will start to make you horny.

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>>7341149
Because this is the lgbt board for lgbt people and lgbt issues.

If someone wants to whine about their straight people's problems they can go to fucking /adv/.

>>7335780
Turn him into a trapu, and rape his bf happily ever after.

>>7335780
I've read all your posts in this thread and I think you should give it a go. Try the gay stuff he suggests. I feel like it might be a "You'll like it once you give it a try" situation, like Green Eggs and Ham.

No joke about that comparison. Watch this video, apply it to your situation, and learn from it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KRkR8HaR9c

>>7335780
I would feel betrayed if my best friend is a faggot and lusts over me

I'll stop seeing him if I were you

>>7336111
This is the saddest thing I've read in a while

>>7335780
From reading your post and your replies I can tell that you really care about your friend, OP. The fact that you can love your friend so much that you would sacrifice having a gf despite not feeling attracted to him is pretty special. Wish I had a friend like you.

Anyway, I've heard of people becoming progressively more gay by fapping to traps, then twinks, etc. Just be careful not to deny your own sexuality if it doesn't work; that can lead you down a long road of regret. I also don't really think being non-sexual life partners is such a good idea, it's not really fair to either of you if you can't have sex. And if you make it an open relationship, you might not want to have sex with others anyway. I think the best think you can do is talk about it, because from what you've said it seems like your friendship is pretty strong, so you should be able to discuss these things openly and honestly.