Need some advice from you /lgbt/ people. My girlfriend is trans,

Her family is none of your fucking business.

>I'm close with my family and I think she should be too

that's fucking retarded
you're a fucking retard
dump her
tell her you're too retarded to be in a relationship
then jump off a bridge to make the world a less retarded place

>>7171225
Wow, tone down the aggression. There's nothing wrong with having strong family ties.

>>7171266
Never said there was. But your family has nothing to do with hers.
Making judgements for someone else's fucked up life based on your own happy life, instead of actually listening to what they're telling you... is fucking retarded.
Ignoring what they are saying and imagining the people you have never met before are like your own family because "family = always good"... is fucking retarded.
Ignoring the giant fucking mountains of evidence all over the fucking place of families who are abusive and horrible and murderous and sick and twisted, simply because YOUR FAMILY was ok... is fucking retarded.

If you cant listen to your girlfriend and respect her about how she feels about her own fucking personal shit, then you are a shitty fucking boyfriend.
I'm sure it's only a matter of time before you fuck this up and she ends up hating your guts and never being able to forgive you.

>>>/adv/

If they're reaching out to her give them a chance. Only one, and make that clear. If she does that at least she can go through her life without wondering about what if she did.

>>7171185
i think you should talk with her about it. but in the end it is her choice. Just support her with what ever choice she makes
Its sad but sometimes families can be so fucked up people need to just leave them behind and never look back.

>>7171225
>>7171297
you sound like an angry person. a sad lonely angry person.

>>7171225
Please go to therapy

>>7171297
Holy shit settle down kiddo. I don't know what this dude or his girlfriends situation is like but don't go around on your high horse acting like you know shit because your family said mean words to you.

>>7171185
first try to think about where she is coming from and how she feels
second consider how her family feels

people change and time heals all wounds.

explain to her that you would like to meet them and see where she came from. even though in the past they may have been harsh on her for transitioning explain that because they have reached out to try to contact her they may have had a change of heart. this isnt solely about her and her feelings alone but her families as well. they may need closure as they cant cope with the loss of their child. maybe they did turn a new leaf and want to be supportive of their daughter now. who knows. just be supportive. convince her that you really want to meet them. it needs to be on her terms though. she needs to feel safe / comfortable. she needs to know that if things dont go well you'll be there to support her, that you guys can leave at anytime if things get too uncomfortable.

>>7171373
>>7171375
>>7171432
Im going to bring it up to her, but if she says no should I just leave it at that? She doesn't really talk about what exactly caused her to fall out with her family. I've always been curious, but if it brings back bad memories for her, I'm not sure how hard I should try to convince her.

>>7171185
>it seems like they're making an effort to understand and accept her.
Here's the thing.
They're not.
They never are.

>>7171620
exactly as you said. you leave it alone if she says no. just try to make sure she understands it's important to you and hears you out. it's kind of a one shot scenario. you sit her down. you say you want to talk to her about the upcoming holidays and potentially meeting her family. make sure you stipulate that you want to get everything off your chest first, that you just want her to listen before interjecting and that you want her to really think about it before coming to a conclusion after having heard you out. if she imediately is like no, that's the end of it. dont push. just let it go. if she seems hesitent or reluctant, dont push, give her space and time to think about it. i would cool her nice dinner to get her to sit down to have the discussion. maybe get a bottle of wine or something. most important thing, if she says no dong get mad. just hug her and let her know it's ok whatever she chooses.

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>>7171693
This made me sad

>>7171734
It's the truth.

>>7171185

>I'm close with my family and I think she should be too, especially since it seems like they're making an effort to understand and accept her.
>especially since it seems like they're making an effort to understand and accept her.

Yeah seriously doubt they're making that much effort.

>>7171757
This.
Such efforts only happen in fiction.

>>7171721
Yeah, I'll give it try. If she says absolutely not, then I'll drop it. Thanks anon.
>>7171765
>>7171757
Seems like they are to me

>>7171829
>Seems like they are to me
As I said, such things only happen in fiction.
Plenty of times families try to reestablish contact because "they were sorry".
They were never sorry.
This family won't be any different.

>>7171225

You taking too much T.

>>7171853
Nice projecting there

Dump that bitch OP. Shes clearly a repressed tranny with to much self hatred like most people in this thread.

I used to date a tranny who said she was disowned by her family. It turned out they didnt disown her and they payed her full UA tuition housing and living expenses by sending one simple mail. Telling them shes doing okay.

People like this are way to much drama take my advice dump her now she will eventually turn on you and blame you for everything and tell you how you are not there for her and make you feel like shit even though you've been there for her every step on the way.

>>7172375
if the family has been in contact with you at all talk to them, ask them what happened. this anon makes valid points. my brother abandoned our family for seemingly no reason other. literally had a decent upbringing with supportive parents that put him through school they couldnt afford and are still paying the bills for. i couldnt go to college because we were of a socioeconomic class above receiving sufficient grants and their credit couldnt support co-signing another set of loans for me to go. they gave him everything they could and he still left. i'm still cleaning up the mess he left them in by working a shitty job to bring home a paycheck to help support the household. that's why i said if she says no, just drop and forget about it. she may just be a shitty person that walked out on her family without a valid reason for leaving. maybe not. maybe thet were really shitty.
from:
>>7171721
>>7171432

>>7172217
roid rage. kek

>>7171185
i'd say do what you can try try and persuade her if you feel that strongly about it, but know that there's a chance she really won't change her mind, and after a certain point you just have to respect her decision.

>>7171225

END YOUR FUCKING LIFE
You bitter, retarded tranny.

Stop spreading your shit attitude and kill yourself to make the world a better place.

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my family was horrible to me when I came out, ended up moving far away, now we're on good terms and they call me my girl name. Everyone here saying not to reconnect are retards.

>>7172845
Talked to her about it today. She said absolutely not, and we moved on. Feel sort of sad about it though

M O N E Y
O
N
E
Y

>>7171297
Honestly not wrong

>>7178905
Dump her let her life her live alone she clearly wants it only matter of time she cuts ties with you because its easier to dump someone by cutting them out rather then talk about it.

>>7181260
Nah, she's just really emotional and has a tough time letting things go. Maybe she'll change her mind in the future.

>>7171185

>trans
>her

>>7171297
>>7171225
As unnecessarily aggresive as this is, they have a point OP.
You don't know her family, and it's kind of weird to say she SHOULD be close to them despite your ignorance of what that might entail, and especially weird to justify that by the fact that you're close with your own. "I like Thai food, she should like it too." Doesn't work like that.

If you want her to have a strong sense of family, invite her into yours. Let her know you'd be happy to visit her family with her as support if she ever wants to visit.

But to act like this is something she should buck up and do gives off really creepy dad vibes. You don't even know these people.

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>>7171185
Seriously, don't. My family is homophobic and the day I can leave them behind me will be the day I'll finally be 100% satisfied with my life. A homophobic or transphobic family can be a trigger and it can bring all the bad memories back.

>>7171185
Leave it alone.

If she doesn't want them, then she doesn't want them.
They were probably complete shitheads, and made her life terribly hard. If they're only at the stage of "trying to understand", they're not actually accepting, and they most probably never will.

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>>7183969
Preach

>>7171693
It's true tho. Transphobic people very rarely truly change. Based on my experience, they're still transphobic even though they say they aren't. The transphobia is deep down inside of them.

>>7171185
Why are you asking us? Talk to her, get as much of the story if you can. If you really feel like reconciliation is worth it, and if she's ok with seeing them again, go in on her side, not theirs. Your family relationship might be great, but take from one, transgirls almost *never* have that luxury.

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>>7171185
Either A: They're going to treat your girlfriend like shit due to her coming out, and the atmosphere between the two of you might be strained,

or B: They'll ask your GF for forgiveness and try to be kind to her.

It depends on which part of the states you live in. If it's the south, steer the FUCK away from there. If it's the North, Ask her and try to negotiate a way to bite the bullet.

However, Like I said, one of the two things could happen, She could either feel worse because of them, or they could ask for forgiveness and begin healing the relationship.

Ask her for her opinion, and talk to her if it's possible they might just want to ask for forgiveness. If it might not be possible, just don't go.

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>>7171185

speak to her, dont convince her, if she chooses to make sure its her decision.

watch episode 11 and 12 of Toradora for research.

ami best girl.

>>7188940
>Someone on /lgbt/ has shit taste

How surprising.

>>7171185
Honestly, my parents treated me like complete shit when I they found out I was "gay." My mom told me literally, "go kill yourself." But, I never really was gay in the first place... when they found out I was transitioning they manipulated me to make me stop. And having a weak backbone and not believing in myself, I stopped. Now I'm transitioning again, and my parents are taking me off of their insurance. While, every time I talk to my mom she disrespects the shit out of me. if it's a lost cause it's a lost cause.

However, I'm not sure if this her family is as toxic as mine, but if there is a place for acceptance and forgiveness from her parents she is being the bitch for not trying to reestablishing ties.

My sister had a child, and it made me realize how much parents do love their kids.

Please talk to her because communication is key to any relationship