clueless straight guy here, have no idea how LGBT works, please help

>>6128835
lol you had sex with a man, fag

>>6128835
Your partner hates his female body. He wants to be a dude. He's gonna take testosterone and lop off his tits. He's gonna grow facial hair and dress like a guy.

>>6128883
but she/he has the body of a girl and last time I checked, putting my dick into a vagina is straight sex.

>>6128919
is that what T stands for? Testosterone? My gf/bf did not say they were going to grow facial hair. Do women randomly want to be men? I didn't know this was a thing.

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>>6128928
You've heard of transgender people right? It can happen to either sex.

Pic related was born with a vagina.

>>6128940
I can't imagine my cute little gf/bf becoming your picture. If she/he did get plastic surgery to become a biker dude, I'm sorry, but I wouldn't be attracted to her/him anymore.

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>>6128946
Individual experiences vary.
And if you're not into dudes then don't feel obligated to stay together.

>>6128966
holy shit
want him to plow my bp/5

>>6128966
oh no... I don't want my gf/bf to become that. Is that really what she/he wants to do to her/his body? That's terrible.

I'm sorry. I'm just a clueless straight guy who doesn't know LGBT stuff and I don't have an interest. I will talk to my bf/gf to see what she/he is planning to do.

I'm sorry, OP, your significant other is a bitch, no matter the gender. Please break up immediately and look for a sane straight girl. Your current gf is going to be a man soon and is being a total dick for misleading you and making fun of you. Not all of us are like this, so please don't let this one bad experience sour you on the whole queer community.

>>6129043
break up with her. now. staying with her will only bring you down. the mental problems will only get worse and it will cause life to be harder for you. You gf has extremely misrepresented herself you to.

>>6129053
my gf/bf is a nice person, it's human to have break downs, i just am confused about this whole thing but this thread is clearing things up for me.

But I'd prefer it if she/he stopped calling me a faggot since I'm only attracted to female bodies and genitals.

>>6129043
Break up with him and stop with the she/he stuff, just use he. Just tell him you aren't gay and he'll probably accept the break up

>>6129072
Yeah insulting you was over the line. But its a hard process for anyone to come out and talk about this kind of thing.

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>>6128928
>>6128946

Yes. It "happens" to people of any sex. Also, it doesn't "happen" typically it's something someone has felt since their childhood.

You may want to educate yourself. Your girlfriend is gonna turn into a man.

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>>6128835
Watch all of these
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7SgbxvTR7N4ABiyIH1vO6BmKkVEpRNp6

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>>6129072

honestly that reaction he gave you is weird as fuck. Doesn't make sense why he would spite you, unless you kept using female pronouns for a long time after he specifically asked not and just kinda exploded.

Btw it has biological roots. See the picture I uploaded.

>>6129072
>my gf/bf is a nice person
>But I'd prefer it if she/he stopped calling me a faggot

Yeah no. In the event that you're in denial and not just trolling, let me explain this to you clearly: "She" is/is going to become a man. Inside and out. Probably will have sexual reassignment surgery, take hormones, and wind up looking like these dudes.

>>6128940
>>6128966

This is no longer your girlfriend. This is an FTM, and one who is being a total bitch and using you and mocking you. It's a toxic relationship. Get out early and never look back or you will be going down a long hard road of disappointment and grief.

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>>6129105

>>6129113
that comic is about intersex folks, not transexuals.

>>6129043
Just break up with him

Well, everyone here has been enlightening but I know I still have a lot to research.

I will talk to my gf/bf later about this more in depth and then I will update you all on what will happen to us

>>6129110
If my gf/bf really decides that looking and shaping his/her body into that of a man is what he/she truly wants, then I have no choice but to break up with her/him.

We will see what will happen.

Break up with him, obviously you are not into him other than him as a woman

If he keeps bringing up faggot tell him you dated him as a woman and thats what you are attracted to, and that their transition is not retroactive to make it gay sex.

if he cant handle it tell him to man up and that he is oppressing you by not letting you date who you want. and he needs to check his privilege

>>6129199
Good luck, straightbro.

>>6128835
Let me break it down for you,

>you met a man
>he looked like a girl all his life
>he's a total gay fag and just wanted love
>you dated him because you thought he was a girl
>it turns out you're wrong
>now you're still together
>he wants to make sure you understand that he wants to get his body corrected
>he wants you to understand that he wants nothing more than to be the man he always felt inside
>he is trying to explain to you that he wants to put his cock up ass and pop your sphincter and unload his cum in your anus
>you don't get it
>because you don't get it you don't understand he was a dude all along and just wanted some love
>except he's a gay dude which means if you stay with him you are gay or bi

I hope that makes sense.

She's insane and wants to be a man. Eventuality she will skin her arm into a fake penis so run as fast as you can.

>>6128835
Just break up, you're obviously not gay.

>>6128835
They sound horrible tbqh.

You could be supportive, but c'mon... dump their ass.

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Hey guys, I'm back. I did a bit more research and assumed that she/he will want to inject Testostorone and get her/his breasts cut off. So I talked to my gf/bf about what she/he is planning to do. And I came out more confused than ever. She/he said that they aren't going to take Testostorone and is just going to wear a binder. So I'm kinda relieved that he/she is not going to turn her/himself into a mangina dude but I'm confused. I thought females to males want to look like men and do the necessary work to do it. With her/his looks, he/she just looks like a tomboy. Wouldn't that still make my gf/bf, just a girl then? Are there different types of female to males that I was not aware of and she/he happens to be one of the outliers?

I was prepared to lose my gf/bf and to understand they were going to go through surgery and Testostorone but I wasn't ready for this curveball and now I'm confused again. Maybe we could still be together, I really hope so.

>>6134445
Your boyfriend is scared of the social repercussions. That includes the idea that you will leave him because you are not gay. You should encourage and support him to get testosterone injections.

>>6134445
She just sounds like she has some serious self-esteem issues or maybe thinks less of herself because she's a woman, not like she's actually FtM.

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>>6134483
I don't think I should encourage my gf/bf to get on anything considering I don't know what's best for her/him and it should be up to her/him to do what they want to do with their body. I'm not comfortable pushing ideas or drugs or anything like that, especially on someone I love. I'm leaving the big decisions up to her/him because it's her/his body.

And I still see my gf/bf as my girlfriend to be honest. She/he has tits, a vagina, looks and sounds like a girl, so she/he is a girl.

>>6134486
I was thinking that could be a possibility too. Maybe this is just a phase? I don't mean to be offending but it is another possibility.

>>6134445
Trannies usually don't jump in feet first; they do stuff in stages, testing the waters. The fact that your gf blew up at you like she did should send some red flags but whatever. Her reactions definitely means she has some issues. You would be wise to try to step back away from your emotions and see if it is really worth it to be with her. As an aside, breast binding over a period of time will eventually flatten out her breasts and give her pancake tits. She may eventually come around to decide that she isn't an FtM and it was some sort of tumblriana phase or she maybe she really is truely trans. She may even come to believe she is genderfluid and fluctuates between being a man and a woman. Once again, you might want to seriously think about if it's worth it for you to have to go through her transition with her or go through her trying to figure herself out. Being trans usually carries a whole host of other mental issues with it.

>>6134531
I honestly don't know man. I love her/him the way she/he is now. And if she/he isn't going to go through the surgeries or drugs to change her/his body, then I'm willing to stick by and be there with her/him. But if she/he is serious and decides to change into one of those ugly guys that was posted before in this thread, then, I'm sorry but I cannot force myself to be attracted to that and I will have to break up with her/him.

>>6134562
If they say they are FtM, then they identify as male and likely want to be referred to using male pronouns and such, unless they have indicated otherwise. I would advise asking them how they would like to be referred to as.

>>6134445
>>6134522
Your girlfriend is just confused. Some people today confuse "identifying as" and "identifying with" which leads them to not know what they want. When you read a book about a robot in the far future you can identify with the robot character as you read the book. You do not identify as the robot, that means you do not have a self perception as a robot or a robotic body.

Your girlfriend just identifies with men. That might mean she admires men and admires gay culture to a point she would like to experience some of that. She wants to be treated as one of the boys but doesn't want to be physically male.

However your girlfriend does not identify as a man. She does not want to be a real man or change her body. She is comfortable the way she was born and does not feel biologically male.

You can identify with anything you like, when you get emotional or excited at a movie you do it all the time.

>>6134608
OP did state that their SO did want to bind their breasts, implying some physical dysphoria regarding that.

>>6134601
I'm sorry, but unless she/he actually takes the steps to change her/himself into a man then I can't call her/him a guy just because she/he wants me to.

I'm a man myself. If you want something, you have to earn it. You have to work for it. In disabled schools or facilities, if a girl on crutches falls down, the staff won't help her up because she's got to get up on her own and learn that independence and strength. Same thing here. You wanna be a man? You gotta earn that title. If my gf/bf really wants to become a man, I will be there for her/him but I won't be his/her boyfriend, and I won't coddle her/him.

>>6134616
People throw around dysphoria for everything nowadays. They don't just get depressed or have a hang over, no it's dysphoria. They can't have simple anxiety or compulsive behavior, it has to be dysphoria.

Cosplayers have been binding their chests for decades and they aren't dysphoric. Feminists have bound their chest too and they're not dysphoric either. The action does not define the cause.

>>6129108

I read the filename as transbian physiology and chuckled. Was disappointed when I re-read it.

>>6134638
I foresee this ending badly for the people involved.

>>6134669
just be glad he and his friends hasn't completely ostracized the tranny or beat the shit out of the tranny. OP is pretty open minded.

>>6134638
If he does end up going to whole mile and starting t and you wanna break up that's fine, but please be a friend to them at least. Be a bro.

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Why is everyone so goddamn tumblr here?

You guys are literally defending a genderfluid tumblr girl and her bullshit. Stop humoring the girlfriend, she isn't a guy no matter how much she says she is. She's not even on T and isn't going to take it. She's just a transtrender.

>>6129376
>he looked like a girl all his life
except she was a girl all her life and still is.

Damn and I thought my past GFs had mental problems. Jeebus why women can't just be chill in relationships. I just want some pussy dammit.

>>6134844
fuck you bigot, OP's significant other is a man, not a woman.

>>6128835
So, I am a transguy. When I first started transitioning I was with a cisgendered, straight identified man who I had been with for 5 years, and planned to marry and all that jazz. We have the same struggles you and your partner are having except ... we didn't have to call each other by slurs or hate fuck.

This is how our conversation around these issues went.

Me: I am a man.
Him: No you aren't.
Me: I identify as a man. I am going to transition and become a man full time.
Him: I don't get it.
Me: Alright, how about this. If I were always a man, would you have dated me?
Him: No. I'm not gay.
Me: Alright, so then would you be okay being seen as gay even though you are straight?
Him: No.
Me: Then I don't think this is going to work, because I don't think I can be with you and be seen as straight for the same reason.
Him: Okay.... So... is that it? We over?
Me: Yes. I'll get another place and move out by the end of the month.
Him: Alright...

*Does WoW raid* Cause that is what we did at the time.

Now of course this is bullshit, this conversation happened in bits and pieces over months of time, but you see what I'm getting at here? He (previously she) identifies as a gay man, you identify as a straight man. Now, either one of you has to be cool with being seen as what you don't identify as, or you need to BREAK UP.

So here is what you need to do. You need to decide if you think you will be able to adapt and refer to him as he and be seen by other people as gay. Maybe you got a touch of a bi and you can do this. Maybe love conquers all (yeah the fuck right) and you can deal with being misidentified as gay. If you can't, you need to put it out there and be like "I don't identify as gay, I never will, and insisting that I do so is just as bad as me insisting as you live as a woman." And then he gets to decide what to do from there. With what you have said so far? I think this is the end pal. Find a woman. Be straight.

>>6134866
Need labels to make yourself feel better and deny reality then go for it. A confused woman that think she is some gay man that likes to play catcher? No wonder therapists make so much money. Then again people like you encourage it along with social media so I can see why so many people become confused and don't know what to identify as. Fucking hypocrites damn disgust me.

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Reinforcing a few things I'm sure the thread aready touched:
>she/he
While the people in this board will usually go for the prefered pronoun considering that we are all anons and it means the same for us, I'd say that you are in a position to call her a he if you want.
Until people make a serious effort to transition they shouldn't be given their desired pronoun (irl)
>what to do
he sees you as a gay guy, that's the reasson you are together. if you don't feel this way and find her attractive exclusively as a woman (as in, you really focus on the female only parts of her body to get aroused) then you should tell her.
It's good to have a relationship to support you, but if the other person wants you for things you don't want it will only hurt both. Imagine someone liking you because you're a slob and allow them to be a slob, but you want to fix your life while they only want more weed. you are hoping to get from your partner things they don't want to give or have at all. it's constant hurting for the vague excuse of just having someone close.
>what do
break up, become friends, ocasionally fuck you the mood is right until one of you gets a new partner. that's the mature way of dealing with this.

>>6128835
lol what a beta cuck kill yourself for real

>>6135155
>Until people make a serious effort to transition they shouldn't be given their desired pronoun (irl)

THIS.

goddamn, you are the only one who hasn't taken a gulp of the tumblr koolaid.

>>6128835
She's mentally unstable, break up with her

>>6135207
i only think that about real life. on line you can be whatever you want, a lot of cis dudes like being little girls here and it's cool.
internet =/= real life, so you shouldn't get too mad at tumblr or whatever. if they try to force people into calling them some way they don't deserve that's just asking them to lie at you.
But also if someone choses to call you a certain way they are trying to help you with the disonance between your brain and your body, they are trying to be cool and it's a nice thing of them even if you feel it's a lie.

I guess it's more complicated than I initially though, but the bottom line is that people should chose to call you a certain way or otherwise you're demaning validation and that's pathetic.

>>6135207

I totally agree with this. Everything else it feels like people are just promoting self hatred which is very bad. If someone truly identify themselves as something they will go the extra length and not muddle in the grey area all confused and looking to others to know which way to go. At least that is how I feel not sure if it's right or wrong but it's better than wallowing in self-hatred and depression which might even lead to suicide.

>>6135250
>If someone truly identify themselves as something they will go the extra length and not muddle in the grey area all confused and looking to others to know which way to go.
It's normal to be confused. A lot of transfolks do this, a lot of cissfolks do it too.

>>6135279
Problem is self-hatred which can result in depression. Social media doesn't help as it gives people with limited experience telling advice which can be very detrimental. I'm not arrogant enough to say I know the right answer as I don't. First world problems I suppose as it seems like people are mentally weaker for some reason and need to be babied more.

>>6135109
>You need to decide if you think you will be able to adapt and refer to him as he and be seen by other people as gay. Maybe you got a touch of a bi and you can do this. Maybe love conquers all (yeah the fuck right) and you can deal with being misidentified as gay. If you can't, you need to put it out there and be like "I don't identify as gay, I never will, and insisting that I do so is just as bad as me insisting as you live as a woman." And then he gets to decide what to do from there. With what you have said so far? I think this is the end pal. Find a woman. Be straight.

OP here. I'm not bisexual. And I don't "identify" as a straight man. I am a straight man. What's there to identify?

Look. I'm just an average dude. I don't know this LGBT stuff like you guys do. I just started learning yesterday. I'm sorry that I'm so slow and shit, but all this stuff is like a subculture that I'm not apart of so I don't get it.

Like science, people observe what happens so they write shit down and that becomes a law or an equation and shit. I'm looking at my gf/bf and I'm observing that yeah, while she/he identifies as a gay man, her/his body is that of a woman. She/he has breasts, has a vagina, has a very feminine body, has a nice delicate voice, and if I'm not careful, I could get her/him pregnant. By observation and definition, she/he is a woman. Specifically a straight woman.

And as of now, she/he isn't going to go on T. Maybe that will change in the future, who knows? But since she/he isn't making the change, they are observably, still a woman. My friends see her/him as a woman, everyone else in restaurants and shit see her/him as a woman, we're all going by what we see and hear.

Anyways, I talked with her/him about where our relationship is going and we both want to stay together. But as I see it now, I'm a straight guy going out with a woman who wants to be a man. Talking to her/him, she/he says that they are a gay man in a relationship with bi guy???

>>6129417
>Eventuality she will skin her arm into a fake penis so run as fast as you can.

lmao

>>6134445
>they aren't going to take Testostorone

good news. you aren't dating an ftm.
you are dating a bpd attention whore straight girl

>>6135399
keep us posted, I wanna see how this ends

>>6135571
I think this thread might be dead by the time the next few weeks roll by.

>>6135671
That's okay, just make a new one

>>6134445
you're expecting him to already know the answers, he's confused and doesn't know what he wants right now. if you don't help him deal with it, it will keep comming up.

>>6135710
people tend to forget about previous threads though
so if OP posted "HEY GUIAZ REMEMBER ME?" He'd get like maybe one or two posters who remembers this thread a few weeks down the line.

>>6135399
Person you responded to as above.

You are right that is some jargin in there. We all have multiple identities. Ex: Brother, Son, your ethnicity, religious beliefs. That you say "I am a straight man" is you identifying as straight and a man. Because this aligns with the identity you were given at your birth, it doesn't require much thought, but you do identify as such.

Everyone has different ideas of what "transitioning" means to them. There are those of us (myself included) who go the complete trek through medical surgery and transitioning. There are others that don't do any of that. It sounds like your sig. other is pretty early on in this whole thing so who knows what they will ultimately decide is right for them.

It is good you are doing some research. I don't know if 4chan is the best place for that but eh, you are here. The one thing I would really advise if you do stay together is not to have kids for a while. It is for both of your benefit. Are there couples that stay together through transitioning? Yes. Are there many? No. Very very little.

Your gf is mentally ill, LGBT is mental illness.

OP if you're still here, I'd advise you make a decision based off the following:

Do you care about your significant other enough to overlook their body?

Are you capable of supporting them through a time of chaos, and come through on the other side without spiting them?

Do they really deserve you?

I add that last one, because you seem like a nice tolerant person, but there are definitely both cisgender, and transgender girls (or boys) who'd love to have a boyfriend who cares enough to actually go and do some research on LGBT culture on his own. If you can tolerate ( or enjoy the fact that...) knowing that someone you love is now a girl, but was born a guy, there's hope for you both as a decent human, and as prime boyfriend material for a significant percentage of this board.

>>6128835

leave her. are you a faggot? do you want to fuck a hairy psuedo-woman with male hormones?

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>>6128835
Just use Him pronouns? If he wants to be a guy let him. And if your not attracted to men, then break up, but still be friends. Its simple.

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>>6136219
but she/he's not on hormones and she/he currently says she/he will not be on hormones. Pic related is not her/him since I don't wanna post up her/his photo on 4chan for everyone to meme, but she/he is as girly and as feminine as the pic related.

>>6135770
>>6136204
>>6136306
I mean if it makes her/him happy to call him and he then I'll do it, but in my eyes I still see my bf/gf as my girlfriend.

As of now, my gf/bf has told me they have no plans to go on T or even get chest surgery. If something changes and I need your guy's help again, I'll post another thread. If you guys don't hear back from me, it's because everything worked out.

Thanks everyone for the advice, even if you guys do contradict each other and are confusing with your LGBT terminology and stuff. Haha.

>>6128966
Honestly that's a pretty great starting point pre-T. They basically look like Bieber if not slightly more masculine.

>>6136608
I don't mean to offend you OP but the way you're phrasing it it doesn't seem like your relationship is heading in a healthy way. You seeing your partner as a female when they seem themselves as a male can only lead to bad things, I think. Talk to them about it.

>>6136608
Good luck OP, I hope it works out for you two in the end