/agpg/ - AGP General

http://poal.me/kd2jf5

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>>5953697
Im going to give it a try basally for laughs
I dont even care about my appeal to others, I will never be fem enough and I'm sure I will drop it in few months, but it cant get much worse, so why not.

>>5953030
so
I was jerking it to straight porn the other day, and then imagined myself as the woman when the man started grabbing her breasts like.. "fuck yes, grab my breasts and fuck me!" as if it were happening to me
and I got off on it pretty quickly
what do

>>5955793
start taking hrt NOW! before its too late

>>5956071
make me your slut and I'll think about it

>>5953911
Careful, estrogen is dependency-forming and lots of people report feeling awful going off of it even if they were okay without it before. Not that I'm saying you shouldn't, mind you; it can make you feel pretty good if you've got whatever brain abnormality makes transfem types respond well to it, just go into it aware that stopping might not be pleasant if you ever decide to stop.

I really want a fatter ass. Do any butt creams actually work? I was thinking about this, but I don't want to drop 50 bucks on snake oil. Pls help

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00IFBJBRY/ref=mp_s_a_1_2_a_it?qid=1459453306&sr=8-2&keywords=glute+boost&pi=SY200_QL40

>>5956181
Interesting. I'm not going to get on trans doses and if anything I'd be more worried about side effects of AAs. Feverish symptoms of hormonal changes don't bother me.

>>5956255
All I could find is obvious shilling or individual opinions. There is VoluPlus & Volufiline that *supposedly* stimulates fat growth locally.

>>5956255

Why not do some exercises for a bigger butt?

>>5956557
because that person is a lazy fuck who thinks magic is real

>tfw getting attracted to women way to much since realizing my agp

>>5956677
No I'm doing mad butt exercises. I just have such a flat ass to begin with that I want a boost in the right direction

>>5956690
it takes time

>>5956699
Has anyone managed to get a really feminine butt from just exercise?

>>5956679

Huh, most people become less attracted to women once they realize they're AGP. Or are you not at the dysphoria stage yet?

>>5956705

I don't know about feminine, but certainly big ones.

>>5956705
have you ever been to /fit/?

>>5956721
>Or are you not at the dysphoria stage yet?
idk... i've sort of become more appreciative of the minor details of their feminine form and feel jealous of every little thing

>>5956793

Hmmm, not far off then, I think.

>>5956721
ehh aside from wanting a good dicking i'm pretty sure i like women more now. i'm well into the jealously stage

>>5956810
i don't think i'll find myself getting less attracted to women though. In fact the whole thing is making me yearn for a female partner even more so since i'm realizing i can't be my own metaphorical gf. I'm not attracted to men.

>>5953697
why are people taking hormones if they're not trans? just to look better in women clothes? something that they won't even be wearing 100% of the time.

>>5956901

AGP is about being attracted to the image of yourself as a woman. Why would they not take female hormones? If all social pressures were off, and it were possible to look like a cis woman no matter when you started, I doubt there would be a single AGP who wouldn't do it.

>>5955793
Do that all the time here. Keep jerking off. If it feels good then nothing wrong with it.

>>5956901
because addiction and mental illness

guyys no. no
is seeing cute (or even fucking mediocre but in a cute way) girl on facebook and getting angry and shit that you can't be her is that ysphoria? no
i don't wanna be a tranny guys ;__;

>>5956946
idk I just want a girlfriend really. But as I get pulled deeper and deeper into this it just feels like it will never happen. I'm not gonna be able to function in normal society

>>5955793
start watching gay porn obviously!

if its mild you might be able to ignore it. dont endulge and it wont fuck up your life

How do you take a rest from your agp when almost everything feminine starts triggering it?

>>5960255

Starts triggering the desire to fap or the jealousy, depression, and dysphoria?

>>5960404
first the latter and then soon after the former

>>5960255
i just start jamming stuff up my butt. it always calms me down

i made a discord in case the mods get buttmad over this thread again

https://discord.gg/0vTR1GzEzuVj6Sb3

>>5960255

I don't know senpai. Not even reading transgender romance novels does it for me. I'll feel nice for part of it, but the it's like "This will never happen to me" and I cry. I'm guessing romance novels written for cis women wouldn't be any better.

>>5960910
>This will never happen to me
This is truly the worst part. It can be exciting and arousing but often it's just depressing because you realize you can never live your dream. I'm so envious of pretty trannies and crosdressers

>>5960807
I'll try that

>>5960255
you don't

>>5958786
>>5958901
>>5958743

Why do you people indulge in your deviation rather than treat it?

>>5963478
Hahahah I wrote all of these XD

It's nice to know someone thought my advice was good enough to pass it along...

>>5963484
It's a sexual fetish. I agree that it doesn't belong on this board, but it's not something that needs treatment. It's no different than having a latex or redhead fetish. This thread should be on /hc/

>>5963562
What if it destroy's men's personal life and causes them confusion and self loathing?

>>5963484
How do you propose to fix it?

>>5963562
Nah it belongs here

>>5963562
>>5963484
This board belongs here because it's for the folks who just need that little push to get through their denial and admit that they're trans.

I guarantee you at least one in three trip trans in the mtfg started off in the agp general.

>>5963568

>implying they weren't naturally inclined to be aroused at the thought of themselves as women

>>5963607
>le you're all just trannies may may
Ha ha very funny

>>5963637

>implying if you were offered a pill that would turn you into an attractive woman, that you would turn it down

>>5963637
Not all agps are trans, but a lot of trans were agp

>>5963648
Well sure. Doesn't mean I'm trans

>>5963664

What's the difference between you and a trans woman if you were both born with dicks and want to be women? Pro-tip: the difference is not deciding to not transition because it's not good/close enough to being female. That holds back some non-AGP trannies too.

is agp contagious?

>>5963823
It's kinda like herpes, you always have it, it just flares up when you contract it.

>>5963823

No. I think it's something women just have as part of their sexuality, so it's a symptom of trannyhood. If you're a guy and you're AGP: news flash: you're not the man you thought you were.

>>5963836

Doesn't herpes flare up when you're stressed?

>>5963890
Yeah but the first time you come into contact with it is when it begins.

I actually agree with you though that it's the expression of feminine sexuality, there are just certain people here who get a bit upset...

>>5961093

I hate how my family tell me not to kill myself when there's so little to live for.

>>5963776
I am a man and always will be one, albeit a severely mentally ill one. This is a tumor that feeds upon me, destroying me to strengthen itself. The problem is less what the tumor is telling me than the tumor itself

>>5963890
and regarding female sexuality, you're telling me that just thinking about themselves as women gets them aroused? putting on their clothes in the morning gets them aroused? looking at themselves in the mirror gets them aroused? i have a hard time believing that

feels like my depression is winning again and agp goes away.
what a shitty tradeof

>>5965645

If you're mentally ill, what do you think a trans woman is? AGP isn't destroying you, you're destroying yourself when you try to make it into an "other." It wasn't planted there by an alien, it's not caused by a pathogen, nobody cast a curse on you; it's you. It's not mentally healthy to make a monster out of yourself because you've been told from childhood you're sick and wrong. Because you fear becoming the abomination everyone told you you would be you tell yourself "It's not me." But it's as much a part of you as your taste in music or movies. You're not mentally ill, you're a transgender woman. The sooner you accept it, the sooner you can take steps towards improving your life.

>>5965689

They're not AGP like that because they already see themselves as women, wear women's clothing every day, and they have had developed female bodies for a long time. If you ask AGPs who transition, they eventually don't find dressing in everyday women's clothes to be arousing.

Cis women are aroused by imagining themselves with more attractive/feminine body parts (cuter face, wider hips, larger breasts, etc.), they're aroused by the fantasy of being appreciated or desired for their feminine traits (i.e. for their female body), and feel aroused when wearing clothes that make them feel sexier (like lingerie, and that's not to say it happens every time). Is that not AGP? Knowing this, suppose a cis woman were to be raised from infancy as 100% a boy and given FtM HRT, don't you think she might have AGP to the extent that natal male AGPs do because she's been deprived of those most basic parts of femininity? Never allowed to wear girls' clothes, expected to play rough and play sports with the boys, given a male physique, and told she always has to be a man and stand up for herself while simultaneously pushed down?

Are you also the same person I quoted above?

>>5966350
I am >>5965689 >>5965645 >>5963664 >>5963637

As much as it's my own perception that trans____ is a mental illness arguably by the definition transwomen wouldn't be mentally ill because having the condition doesn't distress them, only the results of it. Nobody's told me I'm sick and wrong, it's just obvious and causes me lots of distress. And you say these things
>You're not mentally ill, you're a transgender woman.
and it scares me. I read it and my pelvic muscles tighten. Who are you and why do you say this? Off of what, a few posts on a tibetan woodcutting bulletin board?

For the rest, I'm not totally convinced. I don't find that one awkward study of like 20 people to be a convincing demonstration of agp in women. I guess I can't really say more than maybe what you say is true, but I can't see any answers beyond speculation. What would happen if we could take a single woman and put her in such circumstances in an alternate universe? Would it be as you describe? I don't know.

its ok. you can just be a girl

Future hon general.

You'll figure it out someday ;)

>>5966867
if you're already hon-tier, what difference at this point does it make?

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>>5966676

My intention is to help you. A lot of people get caught up in the "AGP" thing too long and hold back from transitioning because they think it's just a self-destructive fetish when it isn't. Treating like it is one is the self-destructive behavior. And it wasn't just the personal you I was referring to or trying to help, I'm talking about everyone in this thread. But reading
>And you say these things
>"You're not mentally ill, you're a transgender woman".
>and it scares me. I read it and my pelvic muscles tighten. Who are you and why do you say this?
makes me feel like this cat, playing with a mouse I've got squirming because I'm right on the money.

But are you sure you haven't been told you're sick and wrong? I don't just mean explicitly, I mean through more implicit things like social expectations and the media. For example, maybe you saw that Ace Ventura film where that female cop was revealed to be trans and then everyone threw up because of the things they did with her? Were your parents, extended family, and/or friends anti-LGBT? Did you have much religious belief and did you focus on any particular things said in church? At the very least, you have /pol/ come by every so often.

>>5966867

Not if I have anything to say about it. ;^)

>>5967484
But the thing is that I think the type you're talking about hardly even qualify as AGP. They're like, "oh one time I imagined I was getting fucked as a woman and got horny does that mean I'm not trans???"

Nobody I know has been anti-LGBT. I was tipping my fedora at even a very young age. Obviously there is nothing morally wrong with being trans, just like there's nothing morally wrong with being autistic. But there's still something wrong.

what sort of social challenges could one if face if they just decide to take hormones and live as a sort of prettier than average guy without any sort of name change or social transition?

>>5967484

You're a fucking retard. AGP individuals should not transition if they are not trans.

The only thing that happens is they experience the realization that they don't actually want to be a woman in non-sexual contexts, feel like they've fucked up their lives and reputations, and wind up with more mental issues than they had before.

Get the fuck out and stop trolling people into terrible life decisions.

>>5968196
tiddies that are difficult to hide in the summertime, never getting to enjoy your tiddies and show them off

never getting to have feminine styled hair or wear fun clothes

still having to have a gross manvoice, be referred to by the name you've hated since childhood, etc.

if you want to have the fun of being gender non-conforming you can't have a bunch of female secondary sexual characteristics from hrt too like breasts and curves because that makes it obvious you're a tranny and not just some guy who likes feminine clothes

>>5968275
you just sound like a tranny tbqh

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how do I make feelings go away

>see girl doing thing
>get jealous of girl
>get depressed because I will never ever be female
>repeat

>>5968343
>how do I make feelings go away
by transitioning and then being "girl doing thing" yourself

>>5968381
>>5968209
>>5967484
so which is it tbqph lads ;^)

>>5968411
this guy >>5968209 isn't really looking realistically at the situation.
if a guy wants to be a girl in nonsexual situations and gets depressed over not being a girl then it is rather unlikely that suddenly everything was a sexual thing all along. a good indication of wether it is sexual or not is when you think about nonsexual situations as a girl and you feel like that would be awesome.
given that >>5968343 they have already significant distress/depression over the fact that they aren't a girl, indicated by them being jealous at girls just being girls, it's unlikely that they could fuck up their lifes by transitioning. pursuing your dreams rarely goes "ah nope, just a phase" if that dream has persisted for a while and isn't just another small thing on your mind.
it is very likely that you are trans if you want to be a girl in nonsexual situations and suffer mental distress over the fact that you aren't. being aroused by sexual situations in which you imagine yourself as a woman isn't an indicator that you aren't trans but rather logical.
if you only get aroused by sexual situations and get alienated by the thought of wanting to be a girl beyond sexual situations you likely aren't trans.
the reason why you get aroused is also an indicator. do you get aroused because it is "humiliating", a taboo or just because being a girl would be awesome?

I used to obsess over how great it would be to be a girl in non-sexual situations too, until I realized that wasn't a good reason to take hormones and cut off my penis, and there was really nothing wrong with my male body as long as I got my shit together.

Remember, transitioning is not something that you discover about yourself, it's always a choice that you make.

>>5968488
>I used to obsess over how great it would be to be a girl in non-sexual situations too, until I realized that wasn't a good reason to take hormones and cut off my penis, and there was really nothing wrong with my male body
then you didn't have dysphoria. good for you but unrelated to the topic.

>>5968488
You're gonna have to do better than the same old tired tropes m8

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>>5953030

>tfw no handsome rich surgeon to kidnap you and turn you into his perfect 10/10 waifu.
>tfw that ungrateful whore murders him after he gave her free SRS, FFS, and super-high tech body-sculpting/whatever.

>>5968542
Damn I wanna watch The Skin I Live In now, maybe i should just stay up and skip school tomorrow...

>>5968538
Sorry my life is a trope.

>>5968507
My point was that I thoughtI had dysphoria and I got over it. I want people to know there are other options before they get sucked into the transition spiral.

>>5968547
Alright if it's your life fine. Your phrasing just sounds suspiciously similar to the daily troll posts hitting the board

>>5968546

Do it, it's a pretty enjoyable movie.

>>5968547
no, your anecdotal evidence is completely worthless. you phrased it so broadly and retarded that nobody can take anything from it. except maybe those girls that are full of self doubt and anxious to transition.
and by retarded i mean you taking your personal experience for universal truth.
>Remember, transitioning is not something that you discover about yourself, it's always a choice that you make.
if it is your life or not doesn't matter at all here.

>>5968580
K, keep pushing an ideology that encourages people to cut off perfectly healthy body parts then, that's on you not me.

>>5968587
You know you don't have to get srs right? And that everything hormones do is completely reversible?

>>5968587
and you're telling me that you seriously looked into transitioning while being so ignorant you don't know the procedures of transitioning and SRS? and you think you had dysphoria while calling it an "ideology"? nothing here makes sense besides you being a /pol/ troll.

>>5964558
its all in your head, you can get joy from the trivial things or none at all from something that makes people happy, get on happy pills and hope they make it better

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>>5953030

Could there be anything more fetishistic without being outright obscene?

>>5968855
would be awesome though to change into her

>>5968542

this!

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This fucking shit is killing me.

Not only am I a porn addict, but I've also had these thoughts since I was 12. That was my first time seeing breasts as I saw a girl suntanning naked on the beach. My fucking heart sunk right onto the floor, and it's been like that ever since.

> Too fat to transition.
> Can't even become chubby qt since I'm way too masculine.
> Basically a nasty ass fetishist hon.

To make it all worse, I'm approaching 25 and can't do anything serious about anything any longer.

Oh, webm related, I will never be that perfect.

>>5968343
Not sure where is the line between attraction to girls and jealousy of girls.

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>>5968855

>>5966867
>Have a fetish centered around being a woman
>Become your fetish sweetie~

>>5968454
You don't know anon personally, you don't know his family, his location, his net worth, his mental issues, yet you are telling him and anons to transition?

Gender dysphoria is a mental illness and more people are waking up to this fact. You can not "become a woman" you will always be a man.

>>5969330

>>5969321

>Gender dysphoria is a mental illness and more people are waking up to this fact


>implying seeing gender dysphoria as mental illness isn't the dream people have been in since the spread of Christianity and that the reactionaries that remain aren't just the people who want to go back to the dream after a rude awakening

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>do you want to look like the average woman or do you want a bimbo body?
>do you want a vagina, your cock and balls, or both?
>do you want your new body to be permanent or do you want to be able to switch back and forth?
>if you had a bimbo body would you want to try to live life as a normie or just become a sex slave for a rich person?
>would you choose a normal name or a stripper/drag queen one?
>anything else you'd like to throw in about your personal fantasy?

>>5969342
>isn't the dream

But when you wake up it's still a mental illness.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSOek-YjvGM

It's one to be a male be naturally feminine or be a female naturally masculine I've seen many like that, it's another to believe you are the opposite sex and can become it. Societies that accept there are gender variant people have less problems, but they don't pressure them into becoming the opposite gender because they played with barbie dolls nor do they force them into closets.

And no am not one of those people you think I am.

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>>5968196
unless you are young and/or naturally qt you will look like a gross effeminate man with pudgy face, even worse if you get fat

>>5969321
>Gender dysphoria is a mental illness
you know nothing about what a mental illness is and what it implies. classifiying gender dysphoria as a mental illness changes literally nothing.

>>5969481
>classifiying gender dysphoria as a mental illness changes literally nothing
Indeed, the cure is still the same - get on mones and transition. Maybe in the future fine brain surgery would take care of it instead but we are far from it.

>>5969415

Very passing voice, but why doesn't she face her child.

>white people

>>5969364
damn her lips look painful. Can't feel good to inflate your lips that much

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>>5969364
>do you want to look like the average woman or do you want a bimbo body?
Bimbo
>do you want a vagina, your cock and balls, or both?
Cock and balls but not mine. I want an untuckably big set
>do you want your new body to be permanent or do you want to be able to switch back and forth?
Switching is for cowards
>if you had a bimbo body would you want to try to live life as a normie or just become a sex slave for a rich person?
I doubt I could ever be a normie but the idea of being judged and seen as a plastic filled fuck doll while trying to live as close to a normal life as I can makes me hard
>would you choose a normal name or a stripper/drag queen one?
Cinnamon Stickybuns
>anything else you'd like to throw in about your personal fantasy?
I'd always want to be viewed as a sexy feminine man and not a sexy feminine woman if I had my dream body

>>5969545
That's the mother. Read the description.

>>5969573

I use 4chanx, which lets me embed the video straight into a post so I didn't have to bother going to youtube. That's why I didn't read the description.

Also
>those comments

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>>5969598
Comments were triggering even for me. Video was trigger inducing too.
The mother and father made me triple triggered.

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>>5953030
yalll need dog

>>5969673
not a cat?

>>5969829
Cat's are for lazy losers who aren't capable or willing to nurture another living thing

>>5969364
I'm not an attention whore, I'd be a nice modest girl, maybe a secret slut
just thinking of it arouses me, it's so wrong

>>5968454
>when you think about nonsexual situations as a girl and you feel like that would be awesome.

Because I conditioned myself to feel awesome when being a pretend-girl and in my dreams.
And that was a moment when it stopped being a fetish and started to creep into my life and ruin it.

>do you get aroused because it is "humiliating", a taboo or just because being a girl would be awesome?
both

>>5969969
you're saying they don't need to be taken care of?

>>5969558
She looks like the annoying orange

>>5971413
kek
honestly i feel bad for bimbo fetishists. they're even more pitiful than standard agps

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Friendly reminder that this is you guys (and most trannies anyway)

>>5970804
Correct. They're too smart and independent to actually be pets. The problem is that they're smart enough to know that they can manipulate you naive humans into serving them

>>5971571
Friendly reminder that I'm mentally ill so trying to rationalize with me does nothing

>>5971571
friendly reminder that putting so much time in to harassing trannies only makes everyone think you're a repressed tranny

>>5971813
Oh there's nothing repressed about me. I'm full tranny. I just hate myself and every degenerate like me. And in any case I'm stuck in bed with a broken arm, and I dont have much else to do. I'm made of concentrated hatred.

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>>5971571
Friendly reminder that there is no such thing as AGP.

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>>5960910
There are transgender romance novels?

>>5960910
>>5972036
>There are transgender romance novels?
yeah wtf

>>5971741
They are dictators, to be certain, but they are benevolent dictators.

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>>5972036
>>5972052

Yeah. The idea to search for them occurred to me only when I was in another thread and an anon suggested their existence.

I found two I wanted to read using this list https://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/transgender-romance The books were Love in Transition and Unchained Melodies (the one in the picture). I decided to use the 7 day Kindle Unlimited trial Amazon offers to try them out.

Love in Transition is about a trans girl named Lexi and a guy named John. They both love skiing and while John is a professional competitor, Lexi doesn't compete because she wouldn't be allowed due to being a natal male (I'm pretty sure the real-life IOC says it's fine though). They meet after John's face and body get fucked up by an eagle while going down the slope and Lexi goes to help him. John falls for her instantly and wants to get in touch with her. He eventually finds her and wants to ask her how he fell as cover for getting to know her better, since he was told she doesn't date anyone. Despite Lexi not wanting to date anyone, they become really close and are basically dating without the sex. She eventually tells him she's trans. There's one part where after John is told Lexi's trans, he's like "I don't want you to hide it from me anymore" (referring to the penis). That had me going "L-Lewd!" and a few other things he said would have made me blush if they were said to me in real life. They have a happy ending.

>>5972036
>>5972052
>>5972261

Unchained Melodies is runs from about the mid 1960s to 1995 and is about two people, Tom and Will, who become friends in childhood and stick together until Tom decides to join the army to quell the fighting in Northern Ireland (the book is set in the UK). Tom is always looking to prove he's a big man, and wants to be tested. Will's more like his follower throughout their childhood, and loves Tom subtly, so he's a bit jealous as Tom runs around fucking every girl in school. Will continues studying so that he can go to university. Eventually, he realizes he's trans after having strange dreams about having an unrecognizable alien body for years. Tom gets shit on wherever he goes, so he ends up moving in with Will (who had started RLE, but not hormones by that point and renamed herself Billie). Tom slowly starts falling for Billie. It's a lot more sentimental a book than Love in Transition, and it made me cry in a good way. The ending is bittersweet.

Unchained Melodies is a lot better researched than Love in Transition (as Lexi had soft skin and could pass even without HRT, and not only that, but she prioritized saving for SRS and skiing over taking HRT). Unchained Melodies also shows its author has more skill. Love in Transition was also written by a cis woman who mostly writes gay male smut, and it kind of shows. I would recommend reading both, but reading LiT first since it's lighter (both in mood and length) and not quite as good as UM.

The problem now that I've read those two books now is that Amazon doesn't seem to separate romantic fiction targeted at LGBT by letter, so now I'm seeing romantic fiction for gays and lesbians.

But guessing from your reaction image, you seem to think this is bad news. Why?

>>5972176
>>5971741
>>5970804
>>5969969
>>5969829
F U C K
U
C
K

C A T S
A
T
S

>>5972261
>>5972269

I just realized I've been calling Chained Melodies Unchained Melodies. The reason for that is that the song "Unchained Melodies" by The Righteous Brothers plays a big part in the book, as you can tell from the title.

>>5969214
>Oh, webm related, I will never be that perfect.
p.sure the perfect woman has actual breasts, senpai.

>>5972269
>But guessing from your reaction image, you seem to think this is bad news. Why?
It was the closest I could find on my phone.

I was initially interested but those two books sound boring tbqh.

>>5968542

>tfw that ungrateful whore murders him after he gave her free SRS, FFS, and super-high tech body-sculpting/whatever.

Anon... you know he wasn't trans, right?

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>tfw probably not even agp, but actually trans


kill me

please

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>>5968343
Tell yourself that as a male you're privileged
... supposedly

>>5973395
that's sort of related to the worst part

not privilege or any of that gay shit, but the fact i'd be physically weaker and more emotional, etc

and i want that

why would I want to be like that ?

>>5973370
Welcome to the club.
Every time you cross the road for a while you'll hope that a car comes out of nowhere and ploughs you down :D

>>5973401
Me too senpai, I love it when I cry, and really want to more often...

>>5973411
Me too. I'm always scared of people thinking I'm girly or a faggot though so I usually just try my hardest to not have emotions.


I remember when I had to have my dog put down because he had cancer and I acted indifferent about it. The vet and my family were acting like it was so weird for me.

That night I drove out into the country and just cried on a random backroad for an hour or so.

>>5973401
cause you are sick of confirming to the societal standards that pressure men to be strong and emotionless and responsible for everything

>>5973419
I'm pretty good at pretending that I don't care and keeping a stone face in public too but being an emotional wreck inside, probably a road to neurosis

>>5972505

Well, I'm bad at summarizing books, so I'll let Amazon's summaries pick up where I failed.

Chained melodies

>Best friends since childhood, life takes very different courses for Will and Tom when they leave school. Tom joins the army to become a MAN. Will goes to university and discovers he’s not. When Tom turns up on Will’s doorstep almost ten years later, he's disillusioned and broken after surviving Northern Ireland during the 1970’s troubles, and with a broken marriage and no future. Will, on the other hand, has just embarked on a completely new future for himself - in his case, a very different kind of self; a woman called Billie.

>As Will transitions from male to female, so the boyhood friendship between Tom and Will changes too. Initial shock and repulsion on Tom’s part becomes grudging respect, and eventually something quite different. But life – and falling in love – is never that simple; and especially not when it’s in the face of prejudice, fear and lost courage.

Love in Transition

>Alexander was never comfortable living as a boy, fighting it every way possible until he was old enough to change things himself. Now an adult, Alexander is Lexi, a beautiful woman trying to make her way in the world as she saves enough money for the surgery she desires.

>John has one goal... To make the Olympic ski team. His entire focus is on his dream. That is until he meets Lexi. She has a way of making him forget everything and he knows his world will never be the same now that he's met her.

>A quick friendship forms between the two, and it's clear John wants to take things a bit farther, but Lexi hasn't told him her secret, sure he will up and leave like most the others in her life do when they find out.

>Unable to deny the growing emotions between them, they both have to make life-changing choices that could easily break them apart. Teaching both that sometimes in life, you have to take a chance or risk losing it all.

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>too far down to live normally as a guy
>not girly enough to live normally as a woman let alone trans

>>5974341
i kinda agree with >>5972505 here..

>>5972505
>>5975254

So what were you two expecting?

>>5976265
nothing. they just seem kind of lame tbqph
you do you though

>>5976480

No, I'm just curious what you two were expecting. Even if you didn't have a specific idea of what you wanted at the time when you were first interested, you should be able to work backwards and give me an idea of what you want to read. Or are you just turned off by reading?

god that movie is stupid

>>5976882

I liked it, except for the end, when she betrayed him.

any of joined ballet classes yet and get laughed at?

>>5976865
again, nothing. i only read the description and said they sounded lame

>>5976913
the book did it better XD

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>>5979550
>XD

What are you supposed to do about mental illness my lads?
Last night was bad for me. You know that kind of girl who just hits all the right buttons, like if you have some mental construct of what constitutes a really attractive woman and she just kind of fits it? I found myself talking to her and it gave me that panging desire, like not even sexual, or maybe it is. Anyway it made me think again maybe I'm just a slightly confused, hyper-heterosexual dude who's gotten so lonely that the brain is trying to cannibalize the body into its own gf. I mean, I sperged out, knowing full well what a loser freak I am for taking the fag pills for literally months. I got home and started drinking and got really high, just kind of getting sucked in to how fucking shit I am. Like always getting high, I got a bit horny a little bit from AGP, decided to masturbate. Decided to try some makeup to get myself hornier but hardly into it remember I hate it and it feels wrong. I remember looking and seeing giant feet and a weird head on me and freak for a second at what a freak I am. Anyway I just go to try to masturbate, can't really get aroused easily or much at all. I don't think I'm just gay, tried thinking of dudes, tried thinking of fucking or getting fucked by one, didn't get much arousal. Tried to think of girls, tried thinking of fucking one or being one, didn't get much arousal. I don't even know if I'm that AGP anymore so now...what. Just stop the pills and go back to compulsive fapping because at least I can know where I stand? fuck

Yeah I guess this turned into personal blog but maybe somebody knows these feels? Therapist is fucking useless

>>5979612
it does though. its just some nobody that gets the surgery. the book is much better, especially the ending

>>5982769
Instead of the whole raped my daughter thing, you mean?

So how many of you here have MEF?


I consider AGP to be a subset of my masochistic emasculation fetish, it's one of the several things I'm into that are in the realm of humiliation fantasy

>>5982694
It kinda sounds like HRT is killing your sex drive and you're just trying to masturbate out of habit. If you're not horny enough for it just don't do it
Honestly you seem to be unstable and I'm worried for you, I'm all for drug fueled degeneracy but you're taking titty skittles for a fetish fully knowing that it reduces your libido, and you're getting the exact results you should expect so why all this concern now? It's like you haven't thought it through

>I remember looking and seeing giant feet and a weird head on me and freak for a second at what a freak I am.
Pretty sure this is a fairly common feel for /lgbt/

>>5983215
Yeah I mean it's not like I was unaware of things, I quit a couple times several months ago but came crawling back, and the past few months had been pretty uneventful. for sexdrive it's not like, oh no!!! my dick won't get rock hard how troubling!!! basically like get horny->go to masturbate->lose arousal, and it's been like that my whole life so I wouldn't really blame it on anything new. don't really think i'm asexual or anything it's just that something has probably always been fried in my brain in that area

>>5983312
That's interesting, what was your sex drive like before the hormones?


Can you try to explain what happens when you lose arousal during masturbation? Are you not able to sustain the fantasy in your head because of other intrusive thoughts?

>>5982769
>find it
>read the whole thing in one sitting
hm.

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is it agp to display my cleavage like this?

>>5983517

>vomitingdog.tiff

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>Have thoughts about what its like not having a penis since a young age
>Remember trying to do things to make it feel like I don't have a penis and asking my sister what it's like not to have one
>Remember having fantasies about not having a penis
>Get older and start jacking off to the thought of being a woman almost exclusively
>Learn about trannies and take online quizzes about it
>Occasionally dress in moms clothes and makeup when home alone
>Don't jack off or feel really horny but slightly aroused doing it
>Get jealous of hot trannies and sometimes biological girls for looking like they do and having the bodies they do
>Fast forward to uni, assume it's all just a weird fetish and try not to think about it much
>Still jack off to the thought of being a woman for the most part but not as exclusively
>Not the most masculine guy (don't like sports, not dominant or aggressive) but am not feminine at all and don't like certain stereotypical girl things
>Not gay but sometimes impulsively think about how nice a guy looks and would probably experiment
>Still sometimes think how nice it would be to be a girl
>Able to repress all these things for a while lately but they suddenly all came back in the last few days
>Come to this board for the first time and see this thread
>Get all kinds of confused and depressed

Someone pls help

>>5983517
Well I wanna do agp things to that cleavage so yes

>>5983550
Also sometimes have fantasies like >>5968542
or going into witness protection for some reason and having the option to become a girl to go into hiding

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>>5983550
how does this make you feel

>>5983382
I didn't usually skip more than a day or two between faps. Never really understood "getting horny" until the AGP started intensifying over the past couple years. I'd usually just try to rub one out taking a shit or before a shower. I wonder if the whole bit might be tied to just having very little penile sensation, which I still have. I never fapped until I was 16 because I made myself do it to see why people did. It was like, alright I'll just force myself to keep jacking off as long as I can, and eventually I came, discovering what orgasm was.
What happens when I lose arousal is basically that I just get bored. I can get a little bit horny but if I don't really capitalize on that within the first minute or two, then it just takes a lot of effort or time to start feeling that pressure buildup. Although I guess it's not always a ton of time, but usually there's a dead period in between the two anyway (well, except for this time like a week ago when I used the vibe and stayed into it the whole time. came in like under 5 minutes I think and I guess I've been chasing that since...) That's not really that new, I don't think, though. I guess I should define ton of time, because I've seen stories on here about people like, cumming within a minute during sex or something. Seems crazy to me. For the most part it would take me 30-60 mins to orgasm. Had sex a couple times and came once, maybe like after 20 or so. Otherwise didn't at all. At one point after hormones/AGP it was getting down to maybe 10-15 at times.
It's not really that I have intrusive thoughts, I don't think, there's just a long amount of time after the arousal and sensitivity has gone that I feel like giving up but if I stick at it I can get close to orgasm when I might get aroused again. Maybe more than you expected but you asked

>>5983382

What is it for normal people? I've wondered this before, like what does the sexuality of a normal heterosexual (or whatever, homosexual) male appear as? Like, what happens when, say, he sees a woman he finds attractive, and then anything from there? What are his thoughts, feelings, etc?

>>5983560
I'm not mtf but what the fuck, this described how I feel about my fetishes so much. (Bdsm, degradation.)

Tried it irl and it was so incredibly unsexy and awkward. What the fuck. Life just isn't fair.

>>5983637
That's a second from the second half of this:
http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17313660-nevada


shit was eerie the first time I read it because it was the most spot-on description of my AGP feelings, even the detached personality and weed usage is totally relatable

>>5983653
Which can be read at
haveyoureadnevada dot com

>>5983560
Actually read through it already. It was nice but also didn't add to any feelings I felt after I first looked at this thread.

Could've done without the political SJW shit aswell.

>>5983742
Go away Imogen.

...the fuck kind of name is that anyway

>>5984196
>>5984254
with a name like Imogen there was no hope for the book not to have any tumblr soapboxing

>>5982694
I feel similar when I hit the lows, its not a turn-on anymore but a source self-disgust. Thinking of myself as a girl doesn't give the tingles of excitement as it used to. Or I just dont feel anything, not even self-pity. All I want is to never wake up.
And even if I fap it doesn't feel good, it's rather forced and unfulfilling. Depression can kill libido, because dopamine is necessary for arousal.

Theoretically AAs can play a bad role in all this, depression is a frequent side effect, cypro is especially bad, as much as 30% patients may show depressive symptoms.
Perhaps getting on antidepressants would be a better treatment.

>>5983550
if you had genital dysphoria from childhood you might be trans, see gender therapist

>>5984937
So is what you're describing what happens during the lows? Or all the time?
I don't doubt depression plays a role, but I've had it for many years so it's not like that's new, plus I'm on bicalutamide so that's unlikely to have an effect. I took an SSRI for a bit but it just made me feel shittier, and if you were looking to solve anything with arousal with it, it's not going to work out. Having read a lot of research on SSRIs, I'm not convinced that they actually work.

I just wish there was a way to find answers. Everyone always pushes the "see a therapist" meme but it never works when they refuse to do anything but "support" you.

>>5985034
When I'm feeling depressed. It's been overall better before, even if AGP consumed too much of my thoughts, I rather enjoyed it. Even if sometimes it made me cry knowing that I could never live this fantasy. Now everything feels from dull to repulsive.

SSRIs work for some people better than others for depression, kinda worked for me. I could even get a job and enjoyable life for a while.
As far as this thing goes I don't know. Some say SSRIs can lower libido and even kill love and need for intimacy, especially old shit like fluoxetine/prozac, which can be good or bad.

>>5985034
>I just wish there was a way to find answers.
No one really knows, and individual situations are so different, what works for one wouldn't for another. Thats why qualified therapist should be better, at least he could get to know you and properly diagnose the problem.
Like whats the point of messing with hormones if you arent trans and not going to transition? On the other hand if you are - you shouldn't lay HRT off.

>>5985201
I mean, I get what you're saying but as I mentioned I have found every therapist quite useless. I feel like they are too afraid of being accused of forcing something on someone to actually say anything useful. Who knows, maybe I am just too difficult or hopeless. But still, not to sound condescending, but frankly I am a lot smarter than most people and I can't think of a single example where a therapist has said anything that has made me think of anything that I hadn't already thought of.
>that autism
don't forget where you are

And for
>Like whats the point of messing with hormones if you arent trans and not going to transition? On the other hand if you are - you shouldn't lay HRT off.
I mean it seems obvious at first, and at the surface level it just seems really to be a restatement of the problem. But if you've ever been on femgen, you can see several examples of self-reported (and really not giving off trans vibes either) cis men taking hormones, so is it quite that simple?

>>5983550
sounds a lot like me, now im getting srs next year

so yeah, you're probably a tranny so you have to either master repression or transition

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>>5985276
Psychotherapy or gender therapy? haven't heard much good about the later, maybe since the whole issue is rather new and criteria is changing all the time.

>femgen
18 y/olds who want to delay growing up at the expense of boobs and then get social anxietly because they look neither men nor women and have to hide their 'boytitties'

As hardcore AGP you'd probably be happier getting feminized, but then you have to commit to it. I just cant (and I'm not going to look any passable too)

>>5985499
What do you consider the difference? I've only considered "gender therapy" as a part of what I thought was "psychotherapy," basically just meaning talking to someone who was designated a therapist.

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>>5983550

>>5971571
ew is there a video fo that thing talking if so I would like to see it

I just want to say that I never jacked off at the thought of being a woman. I think you all just have extreme fetish. Girl clothes don't turn me on.

>>5986894
good, don't ever try it, it's addictive

>>5986962

>inb4 he tries it to prove it isn't that bad, and in that moment, becomes she

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>>5983550

this kind of thing doesn't go away. it's only going to get worse with time anon.

transitioning does suck, and it's awkward as hell dealing with friends and family and all that bullshit. but it's your life, not theirs, and it's better to put up with some awkwardness and find happiness than to repress yourself to hell

>>5987113
But the thing is, I really can't say that I consider myself trans at this point.

I think I could do fine as a guy but I know that, like you said, this isn't gonna go away.

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is there any way to stop wishing i was a girl ?

>>5987759
electroshock therapy

[spoiler]there is no cure from being trans or from serious case of AGP
[/spoiler]

>>5987892
how do I know if it's serious agp or I'm trans


i feel like i have both
except I don't really wanna use my penis

>>5987996
do you get aroused just from imaging yourself as a girl? its AGP
did you want to be a girl from childhood and out of sexual context? you are 'true-trans'

>>5988036
i get aroused when imagining myself as a girl in sexual situations

but it usually goes away when i realize i'll never be a girl no matter what

and i've also wished I was a girl from childhood and not in a sexual context

>>5988046
is it just a nice dream or you want to be girl so badly it make your existence unbearable?
if the later then you should see a doc and possibly get on HRT

if it was just a fetish you would fap to feminization fantasies and then forget about it for a while

>>5988109
>is it just a nice dream or you want to be girl so badly it make your existence unbearable?


i used to think it was normal that guys wanted to be girls until I was 13~ and learned it wasn't

and when I was younger (6-8) I would constantly daydream about waking up as a girl my age and pray to god that I would wake up as a girl

it's gotten worse since then, now i just lay in my bed and think about dying and killing myself because i'll never be a girl

i don't want to be a fag but it won't stop

>>5987505
Also, if I do come out, it wouldn't be till after I graduate college next year and I plan on working outside my home country.

>>5988211
lmao you're a total tranny

welcome aboard friend, enjoy the ride because it never ends

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>>5988211
yeah sounds like classic trans

>>5988501
you dont have to come out, but you can start transition
don't wait till you get more masculine after 20s

>>5988774
I thought the age thing was a meme though and it mostly depends on genetics and bone structure.

>>5988863

There's a point at which it gets really hard. Your genetics basically determine how late in life you can begin transitioning and have it go well.

>>5989424
I also know I'll have student debt to pay off though, so even if I come out right after I graduate, and with a decent job how could I even afford it?

>>5988863
age is only a meme when you're comparing different people. for the same person, age is not a meme

>>5988774
>>5988638
is there a way to get rid of it besides killing myself ?

>>5991897
maybe antipsychotic drugs that put you into vegetative state

if you are in 1st world country you have healthcare support and enough tolerance in society to become a girl, so dont die just yet

>>5991897
lobotomy?
really though, chances are you won't get over it. it's not a death sentence, and you don't magically get a purple undercut and septum piercing if you do it

guys my therapist thinks i might be a tranny x_x
gun or exit bag?

>TFW you can't even imagine yourself as a man having sex anymore

>>5995948
Maybe try the girl pills first and see how it goes.

>>5997142
yeah I heard spiro is pretty good for killing yourself, just add some bananas

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>>5997142
>6 mos in already

>>5997604

Potatoes are even better for that.

Who /desire to submit to cock/ here?

>>6000180
>Who /desire to submit to cock/ here?
Literally everyone in this thread.

>want to be girl, get horny
>cum, "what was I thinking?"
>wait a bit
>want to be girl, get horny
t-thanks agp

>>6000512

Yeah, but I want to hear it from them. And I want to hear their fantasies.

>>5983497

Was it good? I guess it was if you read it all in one sitting.

>>5983557

I remember reading an article about a Mexican tranny who was a cartel member or something similar, and they were recognized by face recognition software. The reason they were arrested again was because they were working as a prostitute. I just found that interesting.

daddy

>>6000180
>>6000512
>>6000789
what happened to agp=transbian scum?

>>6000897
i was a transbian but then i took estrogen

>>6000897

I asked >>6000180, and I thought I was a transbian up until I considered whether I was bisexual after hearing all of the "estrogen made me a cockslut" testimonials (because it seems to me becoming attracted to the other sex because of a hormone is horse shit). I realized I was bi. That was before hormones, and HRT confirmed it.

>>6000987
>>6001033
well if estrogen is going to turn you into a cockslut how long does it take? 1wk? 1mo? 6mo? 1y? 2y?

>>6001105

Depends. Like I said, I realized I was bi before starting hormones when I questioned my feelings, but I would say it would be within the first five months. Alternatively, it might be whenever a decent guy shows up and tries hitting on/flattering you, like with cis lesbians. That happens too.

>>6001134
If I think I'm bi, in a "I've met guys I'd like to fuck but never a guy I'd like to date" kind of way, is that likely to change on hormones? Like I can understand sexual attracting increasing but will it affect personal/romantic attraction too?

>>6001354
i think i became bi in the sense that i think i might like a good dicking, but i still have no desire to date a man, or cuddle and stuff

>>6001354

I think it's possible that your mindset could become more open to being romanced and spending time close together with someone with male personality quirks/traits.

I hate this so much. I hate myself so much. I don't want to be AGP. I'm too far gone to ever be normal again or be happy and have a gf in a normal relationship and just be ok. Why did it have to happen to me? I hate being a freak and I wish I didn't hope for a cure because then I could just kill myself and be done with it. FUCK

Every time I see AGP I think of either graphics cards or AGW. One makes me nostalgic the other just irritates me to no end.

>>6002219
Why didn't you stop earlier. Was it too hard to jerk off to normal porn?

>>6003781
what's with that "shemale and TG porn makes you agp" shit
I need studies

>>5968343
Same. I get pretty depressed that I'll never be as cute or involved as girls I see. They all seem so carefree and happy.

Can you guys go to /mtfg/ this is suppose to be a thread for people who only get sexually aroused at the thought of being a girl.

>>6004060
it never stops at that. Once you get aroused from it, it's a slippery slope

>>6003781
Oh "just stop"? Why didn't I think of that?!?

>>6004307
I have no desire to become a woman. I just like being dominated and treated as a cumdump (aka a woman).

>>6004429
If its just a fetish and you are not trans it acts same as any addiction. The more you indulge in it the worse it gets. And there is only one way out - to stop doing it. Yes you would be depriving yourself of extra pleasure, but also freeing yourself from distress and returning back to being normal. It's like a drug - you get high, but then you crash and feel shitty and it gradually ruins your life.
And its similar for porn addicts too, its a know fact, they can develop erective dysfunction and general lack of motivation for anything else, because the only thing that interests them is jerking off to porn every day.

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>>6002219

do you really think this is all because of porn

>>6005922
not really. i didn't say that in my post, unless you're asking in a more general sense.
i was a little bit agp before i really even looked at porn, although they both increased side by side

So, the more I think about it, the more I realize I'm probably about as feminine as you can be without being a massive flamer. My thought process is like a woman's, a lot of my natural mannerisms are feminine, my most masculine hobby is video games and even then it's a pretty unimportant hobby and I only really play mainstream Nintendo games, and I really dislike, have always disliked since puberty really, how most guys act with each other and communicate. I mean, is it possible I really do have a female mind and sexuality trapped in a man's body?

I'm >>5983550 btw, so sorry for the second blog post but I figured this would be the best thread to post my thoughts in.

/agp/ I just got fucked in a skirt and called/treated like a little girl and then given toast with butter and I'm so happy

life is good

>>6012584
You sound a lot like me, and I think I'm probably trans, if that helps.
I'd really recommend the novel Nevada from page 150 onwars, you can read it at
haveyoureadnevada dotcom
After that, know that it's perfectly normal to have doubts like ‘am i making this up/convincing myself this is the way for me?' so I'd recommend speaking to a therapist experienced with trans people, or just dropping by the trans help general and talking it out

>>6012673
Awww that sounds nice, I'm jealous ;)
Do you mind if i ask what your stats are so i can see if i have a shot lol
also CL?

>>6012584
tbrphwyf it sounds like it's possible you could be trans. i mean, are you feeling alright in life though? if you are, don't worry about it

>>6012673

Nice. What was it like?

How do you get read of agp?
How do I turn it into gynephilia?
I want to get a waifu and make kids.
I'm pretty sure I dont have disphoria, because all desire to be a woman stops after orgasm and I feel disgusted with myself. I'm also convinced that its physically impossible for me to have a female brain, and that I dont want to transition into a mandyke with an axe wound between my legs.
Help

>>6012673
Where did you meet this guy?

>>6013260
It's just a fetish till it's not.

>>6013260
transition cured most of my agp, now i just like men

>>6013342
But how do I get read of it?
>>6013379
What about the part where I dont want to trasition and that really care about being a woman outside of my sexuality? I especially dont want to be an ugly tranny, I'm too self concious to endure that

>>6013379
I wonder how many tru-trans assume they're AGP because they're sexualizing their own body even though they hate being in it. I mean, could that happen? My dysphoria is pretty crippling but I actually don't mind my penis or using it myself (but I only want to be penetrated, no way is it going in any pooper or mouth). The lowered sex drive/non-functional penis as a result of E is also making my AGP desires dissipate. Now I just want my BF to cuddle and fuck me all the time

>>6013260
I stopped being attracted to women after I started hormones tbqh
But I do get boners from seeing my body change

>>6013387
you don't

>>6013488
But I'm never gonna take hormones.
Deep inside I feel like a male, a highly masculine one at that, even more masculine that I appear. I dont feel like a woman, I dont envy women, except when I masturbate.
I'm perfectly okay with being a man and remaining a man until the rest of my life.
I am perfectly okay with being an old man. I am disgusted by a thought of being an old woman.
I'd also be okay if I was suddenly turned into a woman, but I'm disgusted by a thought of being an unpassable tranny.
If I imagine myself growing my hair, losing weight, shaving, getting srs and hormone boobs, I feel like I would still feel like man, just a mutilated and emasculated one.
Aside from not needing and not wanting to transition, I also have huge feet. I also want to have biological children. I might consider getting into politics. I have not intention or desire to become transgendered.
What I do want, is to figure out of I'm attracted to women, and if I can erection and have sex with one, or am I only attracted to tg transformation fantasies.
This is just a sexual orientation of mine, and literally the worst one you can have, since I'm effectively asexual.

Again, I dont feel like a woman at all, hell I feel like a jock stuck in fat faggots body.

>tfw doctors would let me transition into a mandyke but not let me transition into Chad and give me the hormones I need to really be myself

>>6013180
>are you feeling alright in life though?

Yes and no. I tend to go through cycles of depression and happiness. I can't say, however, whether depression was brought on directly by dysphoria. I mean, I never had thoughts of wanting to kill myself over it but I've had these fantasies almost constantly since late childhood/early puberty and I doubt I can just came them repressed completely for the rest of my life.

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>>6013656
Why is it that many of the reasons you stated as evidence of you not wanting to be a girl are essentially logistical?

>>6013682
I stated those after I listed the purely psychological ones and only listed them as additional reasons.

>>6013690
>>6013718
Meant to reply here.

>>6013656
In addition, I think I could fuck a tranny if she was 100% passable, thats one way out if I cant get myself to have heterosexual gynephilia.

>>6013656

If you care that much about being manly, I suggest you stop worrying about exogenous testosterone and work on getting rid of your fat, which produces estrogen. That is, if you're serious about being a man.

>>6013832
The meme arrow part was a semi-shit post, I dont really care about being 'macho', its just that I feel and identify as male inside, and I'm comfortamble with my identity, gender role and body. The only disphoria I feel is that I look like a fedora neckbeard when I feel I could do so much better, and find that look and state repulsive.

>work on getting rid of your fat
Working on it.

>>6013468
I definitely didn't sexualize my own body and fapped to basic agp fantasy stuff so idk

I've been struggling with AGP since before I even knew what sex was. I crossdressed a couple of times and read a bit about transsexualism when I was a kid, got busted, and my parents naturally punished me for it so I basically haven't done it again and more or less pushed it as far back as I can in my mind, though it comes back whenever I need to get off.

Anyhow, I've been thinking about AGP and trans stuff again lately, and last night I had this dream that my friends wanted me to crossdress again for a cosplay, which I've flat-out refused in real life before without giving any reasons. In this dream though, they pressured me to do it to the point where they literally had to corner me, at which point they asked why I was so adamant about not doing it. I said it was because I was afraid of how I'd look, and they told me "no, you'll look fine," to which I rebutted something along the lines of "no, you don't get it, if I look good, I'm going to enjoy it and want to see that more often, and if I look bad, I'm just going to hate myself more, and I don't like what either of those things say about me so I just don't want to."

Woke up after that, and I just haven't really been able to focus on work all day. I went to a wedding recently and all I could think was "this will never happen for you because you'll never find a girl who won't think you're a freak," so to have this dream now is just really frustrating. I really just wish I could find a way to get all of this resolved so I can just lead a normal life instead of feeling like I've got a permanent cap on my social life's success because I'm a fucking pervert.

>>6014322
Hey, idk really what to tell you, but I struggle with the same feelings of shame and inadequacy. If you told me I wrote these things I'd believe you
>"this will never happen for you because you'll never find a girl who won't think you're a freak,"
>I really just wish I could find a way to get all of this resolved so I can just lead a normal life instead of feeling like I've got a permanent cap on my social life's success because I'm a fucking pervert.

>exhausted but can't fall asleep
>masturbate
>cum
>realize I fucking hate living but afraid of death
>feel like absolute trash and hate everything sex
Maybe it's just the sleep deprivation but I have that feeling you get if you know you fucked up bad. Had several anger attacks yesterday or today I guess, have barely slept, over my school shit
Another one when I wake up
Fuck
Yeah not really agp I guess but this is a general right?

Does anyone get kind of bipolar with their AGP/trans feelings? Like, there will be days when I think "Yeah, I'm definitely trans" but then later on in the day I'll think "No, I just have a weird fetish and I've been dwelling on it too much."

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>>6017276
I'm in the same place, except I'm past the it's just a fetish phase and into the I'm making it up...
But I saw this comic online somewhere, and it really helped

>>6017276
Yeah sometimes. I visited this board and some feelings that I didnt feel for years just hit me right back. But I wanked off and emptied my balls, and slept a night, and the feelings are gone. They might be back once my balls refill, they might not.

>>6017301
>cis people don't worry about not being trans
Cis people with agp however do, because they have to figure out what's really going on.

Only you can figure out if you have only agp or both agp and disphoria, agp in itself is not a strong indicator that you shuld transition, no matter what the cucks in this thread say.

>>6017834
>cis people don't worry about not being trans
The key word in this sentence is not, because while cis people may worry about being trans, as the thought of living the rest of their life as the opposite sex would make them uncomfortable, it is far less likely that they would find comfort in thinking they're trans and discomfort in the times when they may feel 'not trans enough'

That was a hell of a run-on sentence, sorry

>>6017834
>agp in itself is not a strong indicator that you shuld transition
This, you should only consider HRT if you have AGP and you're somewhat young and cute.


If you're already mature and have AGP then you to be careful of developing an emotional attachment to perceiving yourself as female outside of porn, otherwise it's a ticket to honville for you

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>>6018431
implying you should transition cause young and cute fetishist

>>6018596
I'm not saying you necessarily should, just that it's a prerequisite

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>>6017301
>I'm past the it's just a fetish phase and into the I'm making it up
t-that's another stage?

>>6018951

Heh heh, thought you were slick and stopped it in its tracks, huh? No, senpai, the ride never ends.

Will nofap make agp worse?

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>>6019873
If its a fetish it should make it go away.


I think I just solved all of my lives problems. I've had no dysphoria or desire to be female outside of fapping for many many year. My only problem was agp, and really the fact that that's the only thing I was attracted too. I feared I could never get a heterosexual relantionship because only ahp shit gets my willy up.

But now, after over 10 years of sexual maturity, I have conducted an experiment, I attempted to masturbate to a cis woman while imagining fucking her, instead of being her. I dont know why I never tried this before, but now I felt it was fucking time. It took me a while to get it up, but I began feeling attraction, arousal and

HOUSTON WE HAVE A LIFT OF

First heterosexual gynephilic test is a success! I dont care if agp never goes way, I can sate my sexual desire with my waifu! This will take time, but I will get this arousal into a full fledged sexual orientation eventually.

I AM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>6019934
i can try that. maybe it will work

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>>6019873
>no fap for 10 days
>want to be girl in a non sexual way all that time
>finally fap
>feel like I don't want to be a girl anymore, happy
>5 minutes later
>want to be a girl again

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I can't stop thinking about how much I hate being AGP. All the fucking time. I'm too afraid of dying forever but I just kind of want to stop existing for a while and wake up in like a 100 years when they have a cure

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>>6019934
>beating it to fucking a woman instead of beating it to being a woman that's being fucked

>>6021498
because one is degenerate and ruins your life while the other is perfectly healthy and normal

>>6021651
>implying agp will not come back stronger years later

Is the anon who started this thread http://deploy.loveisover.me/lgbt/thread/5788347
around?

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>whoremones disrupting my ability to get hard in normal situations
>barely even got hard over getting a blowjob and fingering a boob-creature in an isolated part of a park where we could've banged and no one would have heard us, completely cut off from the world, just enjoying each other's bodies
>felt inadequate about it, worried, decided to just go get burgers with her eventually without even cumming. she's underwhelmed
>i put ONE finger in my ass in the toilet without even lubing up when i get back home, touch my prostate, think of getting fucked, and in 30 seconds it's rising

have I let my AGP go out of control

>>6022105
maybe you're just gay lad

>>6022105
You should probably lower your dose.

>>6022105
you're taking whoremones and still hooking up with women? thats awesome

>>6022143

see below, I'm actually straight teeheehee

>>6022259

I'm a tranny, suppressing T is exactly my goal.

>>6022399

It's confusing. My fantasies nowadays revolve around being fucked, treated like a girl, etc etc, but during my repressed tranny stage I pretty much learned how to get into any girl's pants as a way of asserting my masculinity as a short, thin, feminine, pretty guy, and it's hard beating old habits. I can't go on a week on not chasing tail without feeling insecure and gross.

I want to get fucked really bad and I accepted the idea, but approaching guys would make me feel awkward and being approached makes me feel grossed out, usually, since I only recently turned 18 and most guys who have propositioned me so far are 40-something.

>>6022449
no, you're not. you're a repressed faggot, jesus

>>6022576

I think anon is a tranny.

>>6021498
>>6022070
I'm okay with both, as long there is an option to do other things, which there now is.

>>6019873
It's surely individual, but trying to stay away from any porn helped me.
I'm starting to miss it already. It felt too good

So how do I get a girlfriend so that I can pull myself out of this hormones nonsense, when they all can probably smell my faggotry?

>>6025060
>implying girls don't like faggotry

I literally got together with my ex-girlfriend by dating her best (guy) friend. As an obvious bottom.

>>6025177
i don't believe you. or she must be a weird girl

>>6027272
nope, she's a total normalfag (even boringly so) and picky in who she dates.

Looks + the way you behave can drastically shift the vibe you pass off, i.e. "slutty girl / free spirit", "uncaring / carefree", "creepy and rape-y / forward and spontaneous", "clingy / loving". Very subtle differences in all of them.

If you want detail in how it happened, I was 17 or so and a childhood friend of her (gay) best friend and we lost contact but when we talked again we eventually hooked up. There was no title for it and no exclusivity, and I made it abundantly clear that it was like that.

I eventually met ex-gf while at one of their group hangouts, we had chemistry and got insanely touchy with each other, then-bf seemed fine with it so I didn't stop. Later on at a hangout I wasn't in, she was dared in a truth or dare to ask me out and she did it. We went to watch a movie (star trek? idk it was shit) and hooked up.

Eventually it became obvious that I liked her more than then-bf when all three of us went out together, I made everything clear to both of them but then lol drama and then-bf bitched every other day to me about it so I cut it out non-officially by just not doing things with him anymore and being cold.

While I was guilted all the fucking time for it by then-gf even though she fucked him over too, the relationship actually worked out well for more than a year with no strings attached and we only broke up because of going to college in different places.

None of what happened had to do with me being fem or having been a bottom, just the way I behaved myself, and she cared about that + looks. The vibe you pass off is the essence of attraction.

oh and i turned out to be a tranny in the end lol. or at least agp as fuck

>>5956836
>Huh, most people become less attracted to women once they realize they're AGP
>>5956836
>i don't think i'll find myself getting less attracted to women though.
That's natural, most agp mtf's are trans lesbians or bisexual mtfs leaning more towards women.

>come back after 6 months and see a standard agp mtf thread
>lots of replies
Lol I've been saying most mtf's are agp for years but nobody listened!

I wonder how many /mtfg/ tripfags post here anonymously?

>>6027400
I don't realizing you're AGP does much but if you end up getting estrogen, damn. I was the straightest manliest man and here I am all about dicks

>>6027411
Yeah it's very embarrassing to transition because of a "fetish", though I think there's more to this than that.

>>6027411
i'm an mtfg tripfag lol

i also post on cislesgen and slide right past their detectors

>>6027360
i'm gonna guess you weren't on fagpills at the time though right x_x

>>6027418
>I am all about dicks
Liking dicks alone does not make you into guys though. There are a lot of straight guys who come in here all the time and ask in gaygen if getting turned on my dicks but nothing else about the male body makes them gay. The short answer is no, it's quite a common fetish for men.

>>6027426

I started spiro a month after getting together with her and E a while later, didn't tell her a thing. I can get both with no prescription in my country so no awkward papers she could find, and I was on antidepressants and taking a bunch of vitamins at the time so two extra pill boxes weren't enough to make her suspect anything.

Not getting hard was a problem but I just blamed it on stress from school. My face didn't change too much since I already looked girly in the first place and I had almost no noticeable boob-growth.

I got dicked thrice while with her and she knew, lol. Was upset but obviously had no case since we were clearly not exclusive no matter emotional attachment and I used protection.

>>6027411
>>6027421
lol im also a mtf tripfag and yeah I post in cis lesgen a lot too and nobody knows.

>>6027437
Yeah sorry, should have said all about guys.

Autogynephilia" is a sex-fueled mental illness made up by Ray Blanchard.

>>6029619

Babby's first post on /lgbt/? So adorable.

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>>6030001
AGP doesn't exist! It is made up!

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>>6029619
>>6030001
>>6030228
Here we go

>>6030228
>it is made up because I so
ok bud :^)

>>6030287

Babby's first encounter with sarcasm? So adorable.

>>6030287
>>6030285
i'm just playing lads
there's this one autist who always posts asuka and says agp isn't real

>>6030376

he was sarcastic you literal rug munching autist. Is this literally the way your brain structure works? Is that why you're a NEET? Not able to perceive basic nuance in language like a fucking braindead child? Jesus fucking christ I'm dying.

>>6030441
i guess i am dumb because i don't get what you're going after. i'm >>6030228

>>6027421
h-how many people here are actually trannies+agp and not just agp?

>>6034756
poal(.)me/3aq0hs
Here you go, senpai.

>>6034756
You can develop dysphoria by indulging in AGP so the main difference between those two categories is just time

>>6034875
uhh so how do i unindulge?

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>>6034948
If you're young enough and haven't been rekt by test yet you should go on HRT and become a cute fuck toy for guys, AGP/MEF coupled with female hormones provides for some incredible levels of arousal.

If you're already too old and rugged then I suggest you slowly try to ween yourself off that specific type of porn usage, maybe try to develop other fetishes. I think that just trying to not fap and repressing it is not really an effective strategy, you can't try to distract yourself with other things, you need to be genuinely involved with enough other things in your life to the point where you're content with being yourself.


idk tho :^)

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>>6035022
>tfw 25
>tfw not gay

>>6035059
Not being gay isn't a problem, if you have AGP then you just have to adjust the fetishist fantasy in your head by seeking out content that reinforces the idea that having sex with guys = you're a girl. Once that association is strong enough you will develop an attraction to guys as a means to fulfill your AGP fantasy. Going on estrogen makes this especially easy as most people, even transbians say they've become more attracted to males even since starting HRT.


25 is pretty late though, unless you're especially lucky with genetics you're not likely to be cute unless you get fucktons of surgery and what not. You don't have to kill yourself though, it just means you have to work a little harder to work around your sexual desires, not browsing this board would be a good step as it's likely to give you tranny-OCD.

>>6035102
no it is too late for me
time for suicide

>>6035102
i like girls too much to try to make myself gay
i hate myself too much and will never be normal. i'm a normal straight man trapped in the body of an agp ffetishist freak. how can someone live like this? i don't believe it.

NEW THRAND
>>6036916
>>6036916
>>6036916