FTM General

>last thread fell off the board right as I was about to link this one in it
Welp.

Is there a way to thicken your eyebrows up? I know you can always use makeup, but yeah...not the same.

>>5370470
higher your test by lifting, or try combing the hair downward to make them more straight and low looking

TFW waiting for my hair to grow out because I buzzed it and now I'm getting misgendered.

>>5371758
Why'd you decide to do that?

>barbers didn't clock me
HELL YEAH
>thought I was still in/fresh out of high school
...STILL EXCITED, FUCK IT.

>>5371758
I'm waiting on that too, only its just because I miss having hair.

Wear a hat.

>>5371786
Because I'm an idiot.

File: 35.png (31KB, 217x188px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 217x188px

h-h-hello
very small pre-t here...

I was wondering something that might be a bit gross? Uh... aw gee, tugs at my collar.
How big? Did your? clits grow after you started t.....?

oh man I FEEL SO AWKWARD ASKING SOMETHING LIKE THIS, even hiding under the power of online anonymity, but it's something I'm way curious about. I have a ton of bottom dysphoria y'see. I got that penis envy mega rough, so it's just something I wanted to ask about for obvious reasons.

Speakin' of which, did having it grow out help any of y'all's bottom dysphoria?

s-s-sorry for being so yucky...

>>5372204
This site is 18+.

>>5372204
>when mtfs come here and pretend to be ftms

>>5372217
>>5372227
Sorry if I seemed underage, or like I wasn't an actual ftm. I just feel awkward asking these kinds of questions... sorry

>>5372227
lmao

Curious bypasser here, do FtM's not need estrogen blocker of some kind? Just T?

>>5372282
nah, the testosterone totally overpowers other sex hormones. pretty lucky for us

>>5372282
It would be preferable, but not as necessary as it is for mtfs, it would help with the height and bone structure,
but transitioning female to male is like coloring black marker over yellow marker, its more like a late puberty

>>5372293
Not even steroids or some shit for more masculine features? I mean, I was looking at all the shit I'd need to take to get more feminine hair patterns, bigger tits and whatever else and other places say that you only need estrogen. Is there similar shit in the FtM side of things, even if its largely unnecessary?

File: aom.jpg (92KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

92KB, 500x500px

Whats FtMg's favorite album cover?

>>5372315
Testosterone and top surgery and bottom/hysto if you want it, are really the only things you need to do

>>5372282
No, just T. Taking T raises our testosterone while simultaneously lowering estrogen levels.
Blockers for ftms are usually for the younger crowd pre-puberty or to halt puberty, people who are unsure about transitioning or ftms that cannot take because of medical reasons. I have heard of ftms getting put on them before they were officially greenlighted for transitioning though. But overall, no, we do not need them.

>>5372315
No. Beyond T, there really isn't anything we can do other than plastic surgery. We can get away with our baby/feminine features more than you can with masculine features unless its something like GIANT BIRTHING HIPS some of them have. Good god.

>>5372337
That's cool I guess, though needing the top surgery must kinda suck if you started transitioning late or just have huge jugs. As MtF you dont need any surgeries if your face is okay, even if the hormone cocktail is more of a struggle.

Are short FtM's as insecure about their height as tall MtF's are? I think majority of MtF's are submissive as fuck prolly due to stereotypes and estrogen, is the reverse true for you guys?

>>5372350
>GIANT BIRTHING HIPS
idk mang i've seen some guys with pretty wide hips, getting belly fat hides it nicely though even if it's not aesthetically pleasing to most

>>5372235
You're fuckin anonymous, nigger, who gives a crap. Cut that shit out.

File: lg.jpg (221KB, 630x421px) Image search: [Google]

221KB, 630x421px

>>5372204

Get the fuck out of here, or I'll eye fuck you with my microdick.

File: snappingyourmom.jpg (143KB, 720x1280px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 720x1280px

Does my body pass, /ftm/?

>>5372543
Yes.

File: Boondox - South of Hell.jpg (144KB, 1000x1000px) Image search: [Google]

144KB, 1000x1000px

>>5372323

>>5372357
Sometimes I can feel small and emasculated being small, especially when other guys start shit, their size can make me feel weak and overpowered, usually I just stand down at that point.

>>5372204
jesus christ you're a faggot.

>>5372543
no with those hips
id pound your roastie tho

>>5372664
I've seen cis guys with bigger hips than that. Please.

>>5372664
>>5372796

anon's right. Lovely cute hips and a bit of boob. I wanna see those pants off and see that delicious roast beef.

>>5372614
There's a reason why manlet cis guys always work out like crazy or become full sissybeta I guess

Cis gay guy here: Are most ftm interested in cis gays ? Would they be okay if said gay guy doesn't want to put his dick in their vj ?

>>5373101
A lot of ftm's don't even like using their vag, m8.

>>5372204
Are you gay anon

>>5372543
It passes far too well, I'm extremely jealous

>>5373101
I would be bothered if they wanted to

File: ftm.jpg (45KB, 544x431px) Image search: [Google]

45KB, 544x431px

>>5370409
Ha! Found the guy and the bonus hidden code.

>>5373358
Good job! You win the prize.

A hug!

>>5373116
>>5373307
Not you guys in particular, but I want to have a boyfriend who lets me put my bendy straw in his juicebox.

>>5373644
Everyone's different. We can't tell you what any individual ftm will be okay with, that's something you need to discuss with them.

>>5372204
I'm at a little over 2 inches in one year post when unexcited. Started at 1.5 inch pre-T though. Still strongly dysphoric at times not for size but functionality and planning for meta.

File: wtfloor.jpg (99KB, 423x750px) Image search: [Google]

99KB, 423x750px

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWAG1hmLPho

when friends sends songs all "anon you'll like this song" ... can't tell if they just know I like shitty sounding music or if they know I'm trans because of my shitty taste in music. Dilemma.

Anyone else stealth that feels friends know whenever they bring up trans media and it's probably never crossed their mind?

>>5370409
>tfw Australian MtF from last thread with no qt FtM bf
why even live
arbitrarydegeneracy@gmail

>>5372849

I got top surgery ~ 7 months ago. Bitch gave me some pecs is all. Fuckin bet you wanna see my roastie, faggot

File: pompeya.jpg (364KB, 1024x1024px) Image search: [Google]

364KB, 1024x1024px

>>5372323
I was about to choose a different one but I think there was bias because I like the album so much. This one is still good stuff but the artwork is up there.

>>5374610
How tall are you?

>>5375054
this is getting too gross. please leave

>>5375125
He's doing it on purpose, you know. Basically trying to act like "hurr ur all str8 grills" and shit like that. Just ignore it.

>>5375152
>>>/out/

aw you guys are total pussies

Just a curious gay cis guy here. What's the current state of FTM bottom surgery? I have the idea it's the choice between "a really small dick capable of erection" or "a pound of flesh from your arm", but is this outdated?

>>5375316
Basically still that or just keeping your original plumbing. Shit sucks, man.

i thought you guys liked chasers

>>5375337
i don't mind people who are sexually attracted to me when my being trans is a factor in that attraction. i loathe people who see me as a sex object to be used and humiliated rather than as a human who deserves a baseline level of respect.

>>5375383
This.

>>5375383

I wish that more people would grasp this.

>>5372204
Mine is 8 inches.

>>5372357
>Are short FtM's as insecure about their height as tall MtF's are?
I know my qt mtgf wishes she were shorter but 5'8" isn't that out of the ordinary for women.

Meanwhile I'm 5'0" and I've met exactly two cis dudes my height in my whole life. Even my manlet Italian ex boyfriend is taller than me and I definitely remember being at least a few inches taller when we were dating.

I guess adjusting for practical reasons for feeling bad about height she's more insecure. *shrug*

>>5376453
I'm prepared with excuses for why I'm so short.
>I've got Mexican and Italian blood, I'm just that unlucky
>No, I'm just far away

>>5372357
I'm 5'2. I actually don't mind being short, I think it's cute. I'm very feminine though.

inb4 "why are you transitioning if you're feminine"

>>5376467
I'm 5'3", my mom's 4'11" and my dad 5'8", so I usually just tell people I didn't have a chance. Hah.

File: this snibs the snab.jpg (90KB, 511x788px) Image search: [Google]

90KB, 511x788px

>>5376453
>I know my qt mtgf wishes she were shorter but 5'8" isn't that out of the ordinary for women.
What about us who are over 6'? Basically in the same boat as 5' and under FtM's

>>5376453
its probably why you turned out a fag

>>5377226
A shorter man is far more "pathetic" in people's eyes than taller women. I work with a cis girl who's 6'2" with a kid and she has quite a lot of guys after her. Yeah she does get comments but they're never anything bad, worst being short guys acting shocked kek.

>>5377251
Being 6'1'' as a girl doesn't help with passing and unless you're assertive and domme type of woman I dont think there's much game for you. And yeah my heart goes out to you short FtM's too there's a ton of social stigma about being that short as a guy.

>>5373703
This is terrible, yeah.

How to live if you're a fag and transgender?

>ftms on 4chan
Finally, my people have arrived. We have to be the smallest minority here.

>>5375316
Almost no one chooses the small dick because its small, and literally all it is is a big clit, it cant do anything else. At lease with the arm flesh you can piss, cum, have a big dick, and you can still become hard.

>>5375316
Yep, that's correct.
>>5375337
I like chasers somewhat

>>5378229
Suck dick and cry about no dick.

>>5378297
>cum
>become hard
I can't tell if you're misinformed or delusional.

>>5378316
With dicklift implants you can become erect but naturally, no. And yes you can still cum, both men and woman have cum

>>5378358
Semen and vaginal fluids are two very different things.

>farts smell like my insides are rotting
>can't poop
>drink coffee
>eat chocolate
>incredibly unpleasant poop
>feel better
How you doing today, guys?

>>5379246
i'm enabling my urge to "fix" people with a friend who isn't atrocious but has some shitty annoying habits that have driven others away in the past. i'm trying to do it relatively respectfully, learning what his own goals are & then tying what i want to change into them, but it's still a behavior i shouldn't be encouraging in myself.

>>5379373
Is being a fixer a bad thing? I always have the urge to help and advise when somebody has a problem. Though unless there's something specifically wrong, I won't interfere.

>>5379458
oh, i mean like convincing people to change themselves when they didn't originally want to. helping people who want to change is totally different to me

>>5375263
subtle

>>5379246
thats cause you don't eat enough fat faggot

>>5379583
I eat plenty if my squishy carcass is any indication, my gut probably just needed a kick start today.

>>5379458
Well...it actually depends. I've known people where the only reason they will literally get involved with someone is if they're fucked up. Then they "fix" them, get bored, drop them and leave them fucked up again. So I guess it really depends on the people involved.

I actually have a friend who admitted to me he's only interested in fucked up girls and he's already getting bored of his new gf because she's so normal.

>make some friends online
>one guy gets really slutty when he's drunk
>he's attached to me and thinks I'm cis
>starts sending me innocent pics without me even asking
>slowly turns to lewds as the weeks go by
>he doesn't even have a crush, just gets really slutty when drunk and likes to tease me
>now sends me full on jerking off webms when he's wasted
>turned on as fuck but can't feel anything but guilt for some fucking reason
Why don't I have a dick. It's literally killing me. Like I actually am beginning to get suicidal over just not having a dick. Before it was at least tolerable but this is starting to make it really bad.

I dunno.

>>5379753
can't you just tell him you're trans? it's not like you've been actively leading him on without telling him or anything, if he's an online person it'd be a good idea to come out now

>>5379782
Normally I would have by now if we had an active romantic relationship going on, but it seems strictly platonic and him just being slutty while drunk. We just talk normally otherwise or jokingly flirt. I mean I even told him I'm not in a position to date and he told me he wasn't even interested in me like that.

Is it really necessary to tell him I'm trans? It does just seem like it's all for fun. It's just really getting to me that I don't have a cock. I only wish I could reciprocate or at least have fun without feeling dysphoric.

>>5379753
>>5379798
Can I send you webms of myself jerking off? You being trans is totally out in the open for us

>>5379804
I mean...I have no issue if you want to, buddy. :^)

>>5379810
You got skype?

>>5379822
Y'know what, now that I think about it, I can't be sure if you're not that creepy ass fuck from earlier on in the thread or not.

>>5379838
I promise I'm not, for what it is worth. IDs would be really useful right now

>>5379838
>sure send me a video of you jerking your load
>UNLESS you're that guy talking about roast beef

Such a strange world.

>>5379869
KEK. what can I say.

>>5379869
>>5379875
Never thought I'd see the day where I'd get e-cockblocked by a shitposter

>>5378439
Its still cum, I didn't specify which one

>>5372323

i can't think of a favourite album cover, but i love the art in this diego's umbrella video i just watched:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4dkveB3zV_c

the song is meh, but my birds like it... diego's umbrella is somehow a kinda shitty band with a lot of great elements to their music generally though... so that's not really surprising... i only know about them cuz i like gogol bordello

haven't thought about morbid angel in a long fucking time... i think metal guitar is amazing, but i can't stand the fucking vocals usually...

>>5379753

someone doesn't need to know you're trans if all you're doing is watching them jerk off on cam... who gives a shit? it's more likely just that they trust you to not show anyone and shit, and know you'll watch than anything that involves you in any other capacity... not like you're getting married or gonna fuck... or even do anything together past this

>>5380559

+i meant:

so it's not surprising that the song isn't great ... my bad i'm high

(just to preface im ace and LIKELY aro)
i've recently hit a new low in my depression. i was fine for a long while because i had no potential love interests and wasn't dysphoric, but now that im actually dorming and seeing other people that share my interests ive found a guy that i think i might have feelings towards.
it makes me physically sick to think about and i get incredibly anxious when he's around despite him knowing im trans and being okay with it. a mutual friend has also told me that he did at one point really like me but i dont know if thats still true.
i hate the idea of dating someone because i feel so inferior or like i just become a part of another person instead of being seen as myself, and im so hesitant to let anyone get close to me.
the guy is ace too and probably aro as well so i dont have high hopes for anything happening (which is for the best honestly) but its driving me up a wall lately and i feel horrible about it.
my only solution so far has been getting really drunk so i dont worry as much but that seems like it could lead to issues.

tl;dr aro/ace anon may be feeling some type of way about a person who's hinted they may feel some type of way back and is having a mild breakdown over internal conflict

>>5380601

just hang out and stop worrying about complicated shit that doesn't matter anyway... it's not like either of you is obligated to do anything just cuz you enjoy each other's company or that anything will happen now or eventually...

and you feeling inferior doesn't really matter if he felt that way towards you that'd be one thing, but you having low self esteem has fuckall to do with him... so it's not worth stressing about...

just be yourself and get to know someone, if you get close you get close if not then you gave it a shot... but it's really not a big deal to talk and spend time with a person...

you're overthinking unnecessary shit... whatever's gonna happen will, but you're more likely to regret withdrawing more than you would just seeing where shit goes...

>>5380666
I completely agree w everything you've said, it's just my anxety running rampant lately between this and finals and im worried about everything even if it doesnt matter haha

i havent felt anything stronger than friendship towards anyone in years, which is why this is distressing. i know i should just relax about it and im going to try

>>5380688

well most things are easier said than done i suppose...

>idly adjust edge of binder through shirt
>feels odd
>stick hand up shirt
>part of velcro has come away from material
Great. Not the first time I've done a shoddy repair job but stitching velcro is a bitch.

>>5380944
Sucks anon... Sewing Velcro and seeing on stretch materials are some of the worst and binders have both.

i feel terrible, like i'm supposed to be doing something but nothing i try is either doable or "right." i'm really worried that this abilify prescription is making my anxiety rise a lot, which would be bad since i was given a monthly shot for it (i didn't have any side effects when i took it years ago so the nurse practitioner thought it was fine & i didn't have the energy to protest).

like the only thing i feel decent doing is talking to people, but offline is much easier than online & my roommates don't have time to humor me right now

>>5382833

come over and smoke with me... my s/o passed out on me so i'm lonely and bored now...

>>5382896

+ you're probably way too far though, everyone is i think...

>>5382912
yeah, i totally would if i lived anywhere near you, you seem like someone i could really get along with even when we disagreed

>>5382930

too bad...

i can usually get along with people even if i disagree with them... even after fights really cuz i don't care much about holding on to that shit...

Anybody around by any chance?

Fell off the wagon and had a bunch too drunk and love you guys so much

Tfw no benis to make bad deacons with
Probably a good thing but man I'm feeling good/bad now

Captcha sux

finally caved and started putting together a secret playlist of ftm vlogs

fuck

>>5384506
Find any good ones to share?

File: homobonus.jpg (23KB, 250x348px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 250x348px

Do trans men still actually look like 10 years younger than cis men of the same age post-HRT or is that just a myth?

>>5385150
It's a myth. It's entirely up to the individual and their lifestyle, genetics etc.

>>5383820
>Tfw no benis to make bad deacons with
You don't need a penis to make bad decisions *wink*

Right now I'm 22 and pre-t. I can usually pass as a sorta androgynous asian guy, but apparently I look super underage. Is that something that'll change once I start on T? Or is it something that I'll have to live with having my genes?

>>5379577
hehe, get it? Pussy? And I called you guys pussies? Hehe

>>5379879
>>5379869
>>5379838

You guys are as contradictory as mtfs

>oh yeah, chasers are cool
>fucking don't say you like my vagina you piece of shit
>gross!

Jesus, ftms sure can't take a compliment.

>>5385889
it definitely could change, but you could be unlucky. don't totally depend on it happening, but it's likely.

>>5384726
mostly just the ones about preserving/maintaining your singing voice

https://youtu.be/WSYTsVz17lE
https://youtu.be/stslhag2HCw

those seem to be the only good ones on youtube, the rest of the dudes bragging about their voices are creaky as fuck

>>5385889
Asian here, started T at 17 and was androgynous/really underage looking when I started, now at 19 I look pretty normal and T has helped my apperance catch up to my age. Everyone around me assumed I was going through later puberty. Still look pretty young, but if I was cis I'd probably look young too so eh.

>make a list of indications I'm female
>make a list of indications I'm male
>male side is longer and more fleshed out
>realise accidental double-entendre in last point
Dammit. I was going out of my mind recently, so on the brink of telling someone about my questioning but totally wussed out. I'm gonna go bash my head against my desk til sleep comes.

Does it ever end?

>>5385889
No matter how hard you try to pass without hormones, they are the single more prominent signifier of maleness and only extremely lucky ftms pass well without them. Working out, binding, having a good barber and dressing to remove emphasis from female traits are all good as far as dysphoria and passing casually, but it's naive to believe that especially as you age, people aren't just being polite.

Have heart, though. I didn't start hormones until I was 22 and people thought I was a teenager until my mid twenties. Male puberty ages lots of men differently, and once you're out of the awkward teen looking stage you'll probably just be glad to look a bit younger.

>>5389188
No.

>>5389188
I wish it would.

>>5389188
No. You will always be trapped in an endless loop of beginning to trip, but you will never know whether or not you'll catch yourself.

>>5389408
>>5389489
>>5389259
>tfw

File: 1401918758544.jpg (66KB, 284x253px) Image search: [Google]

66KB, 284x253px

>had very anxious period earlier
>haven't eaten all day
>only running on two cups of coffee
>don't sleep properly these days
>for some reason thought this would be a good time to repair binder
>clumsy sewing skills
>stitching velcro and stretch material
>hands shaking like crazy
>chest keeps getting in the way when doing precise parts
>mfw
Jesus fucking Christ I need to get a grip.

>>5390466

are you sewing it while it's on you? i know fuckall about sewing, but that seems like a bad idea considering...

>>5389188

nah, but your perspective can change and make life more tolerable...

>>5390510
No, I wasn't wearing it. I'm just antsy and anxious and clumsy today. And trying to do fiddly tasks like threading needles when I can't hold it near my face or chest makes it even more chaotic. I completely forget how to take my body into account when I'm not wearing my binder, don't know how women get anything done with that shit in the way all the time.

>>5390557

lol oh neverming then... honestly i couldn't think of any other way for your chest to get in the way unless you were wearing it... or really how they get in the wat of anything you can do... i've never had an issue with that, but i guess i don't have much going on there so that's probably it...

honestly weird tedious shit i can do with my hands actually helps me calm down... i got over a panic attack once just by helping my s/o's friend get the drawstring back in his pants with a sewing needle... it's having to force myself into extreme focus mode that helps, writing can do the same but only in a notebook with a pen

>>5390599

nevermind*

File: anxiety.jpg (16KB, 320x256px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 320x256px

Nevermind periods, how do y'all deal with ovulation?

I'm dysphoric as shit and fucking terrified of cis men and still keep having the urge to go seek their attention and every month once it's passed I think I must've imagined it since there's no way it was that bad and jesus christ every time it is just that bad.

>>5390768
What are you, a cat?

>>5390832
YES.

>>5390839
Well, if you can't stop rubbing your butt on people and yowling then we're gonna have to get you spayed.

>>5390879
The government is getting me spayed next year if I manage to ask nicely enough but

I AM FUCKING TERRIFIED OF MEN
I AM TERRIFIED OF SEX
AND THIS FUCKING FEELING DOESN'T GO AWAY

>>5390889
Do you let dudes cum in your fronthole?

>>5390954
I don't let people capable of popping a boner lay a hand on me.

>>5390972
are you that finnish guy with the fucked up world views?

>>5391007
What?

>>5391038
the guy with severe self esteem problems who believes that all men are savage, animalic rapists

>>5391072
no, but sounds like I've missed a thread.

>>5391088

sounds like you missed out on a bonding experience...

>>5391007
>>5391072


i thought the same thing btw...

>>5391367
I don't think men are rapists.

>>5390889
I guess you're just really sensitive to your cycle, I only notice its effects in those 1 or 2 volatile days before shark week hits. Wonder how hormone replacement would affect you...

>>5391471
I hope it makes it stop and forget all about dating, too.

>>5391372
Me three

File: image.jpg (32KB, 378x378px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 378x378px

tfw you're almost 2 years on T and you still get cramps every now and then

>>5391394

so why are you terrified of them?

>>5391526
I have no idea. I just get nervous.

Lads
I really need advice

There is a girl I really like and she likes me but I'm dysphoric as fuck, she knows I'm trans though.

My problem is, even if I just sort of gave her head or something I'd feel so shit getting close to her knowing I've got a twat between my legs. You guys know that feel.
Anyway, I am meant to be getting an appointment about bottom surgery soon, but the thing is is even if I waited to get that it would be ages to heal and even be able to fuck, right?
But I was thinking, even if I could wait and just get it done, I might feel well enough to sleep with her and stuff (i.e. not sex) and whatever without feeling intense dysphoria?

But even that would take a while, I guess. Basically, I guess what I'm asking isdo you think it's worth getting a prosthetic?
I'm not exactly rich, and the thing is, considering I am nearing surgery, is it a waste? I could probably put off getting with her for a few months because of reasons, but I don't want to leave it too long and have her think I'm not interested.

I don't know lads, what do you think?

>>5391786
I can't speak for anyone else here, but the current bottom surgeries we have don't interest me very much. We really can't tell you what to do though. My bottom dysphoria is bad, but I can't see myself going for any of our current options.

>>5391786
If she knows you're trans, surely she'd understand how uncomfortable you may be with your body. And you can be in a relationship without having sex, I'm sure she'd survive. If she can't, she might not be right for you.

>>5391583

nervous in what way?

>>5391786

i uh actually don't know that feel desu... i don't care how i'm getting someone off it's just doing it that matters... sometimes shit's more important than nursing shitty feelings you have about yourself... and physical contact and sex are definitely up there... denying yourself a good time or contact with another person at all is pointless...

you gotta learn to stop thinking, that works better than a prosthetic and it's free...

>>5390466
>>5390557
Probably because you haven't eaten, slept, and have only drank coffee. You're making your anxiety worse bro.

>>5391484
Have you ever dated before? I've noticed with some female friends who never had a bf are fucking terrified of men at this point. They don't hate them or anything, I suppose their anxieties about tfw no bf and and self esteem just built the fuck up.

>>5390599
>honestly weird tedious shit i can do with my hands actually helps me calm down...
Try alternately tapping on your knees. Tap on your right knee with you right hand, then tap on your left knee with your left hand. Repeat that at a little faster than one tap a second. While you are doing that breath in, hold, then exhale for a rate of around 6 to 8 breaths a minute.

Anybody have any recommendations for an inexpensive online therapist?

I'm aching for my letter so I can start T but I live in a rural as shit area, there are no gender clinics or gender therapists (or general therapists willing to write me my letter) ANYWHERE around here.

>>5392284
Ask in trans help general. I know there are some cheaper ones. Only one I know who does skype sessions off the top of my head is Anne Vitale, but I expect her rates are normal.

Does it ever bother anyone else else that they never/never will grow up with an actual male experience?

I feel like I wasted most of my life just hiding or being confused and I'm already in my late 20's. I don't know anymore.

>>5392072

i prefer it to also be somewhat mindless, and maybe not make me look crazy... that's why writing helps, or playing guitar... or like the drawstring thing made sense... i feel like tapping my fingers and working on my breathing is probably a good way to look crazy

idk... i'm high though and just thinking about shit i wouldn't wanna sit next to someone on a train while they did it... and well, that's definitely something that would make me notice someone as a possible "nope"

>>5392810
I knit. Not in public because that'd make me a huge fag, but knitting helps me. Most of the time I don't even make anything, I just do it for awhile, undo it all, and start again, etc.

>>5392780

i've felt like that yeah, but then i figure it's wasted sentiment... cuz i mean, i could dwell or just accept that my life has been what it is, and it's part of who i am you know? i'm trans, and it's been my experience of life and shit hasn't gone the best route... and it sucks and something else would've been nicer in that area of my life but well... i can't do shit about it, so i figure dwelling is pointless and i move on...

people can't help but think shit like "i wish this had been different" and "shit'd be better if i..." sometimes, that's normal i think about anything that's wrong...

>>5392827

my mother tried to show me that shit, and crocheting, but i couldn't focus at all... and i got bored of it really quick, i think it's cool when someone can do it though cuz you can make a lot of shit but it's not for me at all...

doesn't really involve my hands other than turning pages, but chilling on a balance board and reading chills me out too...

>>5392827
I should probably adopt a nervous habit that isn't self destructive involving tweezers or nail clippers.

>>5392827
I know a cis guy who knits and he's...basically straight. It's not that weird honestly.

>>5392827
>>5393021

+ if it makes you feel better knitting... i like getting high as fuck and making flower arrangements... and similar shit with my s/o using like bones and shit too... dried flowers usually...

i actually have dried flowers and plants all over my room and in books and whatnot... from walks and the garden

>>5393099

i pick at myself too... i try not to though...

clay is a decent distraction... i can only make flowers with it (i'm used to looking at them, and they can be more organic as far as shape goes so you don't gotta be as precise) and i have to be high as fuck otherwise nothing comes out even sortof ok...

>>5392769
Will do.

>>5391786
She knows you're trans, so she must know you're uncomfortable with your body. Nonetheless, Bottom surgery is pretty inadequate in this current day and age imo, but nonetheless it's a good idea to invest in a prosthetic.

>tfw mother is off the walls with her bipolar/pstd/multiple personality shit

Involuntarily committing an adult is hard. Police and hospitals keep getting involved and she's proven time over and time she's not mentally fit to make decisions, but she took all her papers so we can't even get in contact with her psych.

Good lord I'm traumatized by what a teacher told our class once "if you want to see what a girl will be like later, look at her mother." I'm terrified of turning into this and I'm only a little crazy.

>>5393664
Thank god I ended up like the opposite of my mom.

Shit, I haven't been here in forever. I missed the casual discussion. FTMG is so chill in comparison to the other generals on the board.

>Started T a week ago
>Going by male name at seasonal job
>Makin cash money so I can buy bf an expensive christmas present
Feels good man

>>5394286
Noice. Kudos bro and welcome back. Thanks for bringing some positivity with you.

For those of you guys on T, how long was it until you experienced your voice beginning to change? I mean, I imagine it's different for everyone obviously.

File: image.png (68KB, 500x241px) Image search: [Google]

68KB, 500x241px

>>5394760
Difficult for me to say since I get sick a lot and a couple months in it seemed I got a raspy sore throat that never seemed to get better only cranky and deepen gradually and now I'm a year in a sound mid-way through puberty... Here's a chart of changes

What the hell do I do about PMDD if I'm pre-t?
Birth control, for obvious reasons, failed spectacularly. My gyno didn't listen when I said "low-to-no estrogen."

>>5392827
>Not in public because that'd make me a huge fag

See, failing at gender roles by knitting in public is not a concern of mine. (I do far worse.)

But I do hate it because every 30+ woman will force me into conversation because apparently trying to count my stitches in peace is somehow the MOST WONDERFUL THING and they ramble for an hour about how their mom or grandmom knitted but they never learned blahfuckityblah. I only knit around other people if I'm traveling. People actually leave me alone.

>>5394846
Damn, hair thinning can happy that early no matter what age you are? Shit.

>have time sensitive project due tomorrow
>can't sleep until I finish project
>can't finish project because tired/under pressure
>stuck in stress loop
>itsalmost4am.avi

send help

File: 1370745141753.gif (144KB, 354x369px) Image search: [Google]

144KB, 354x369px

>>5394885

>>5394875
Knitting is the only thing I'm insecure about as far as 'gender roles' is concerned, and I just don't want unwanted attention in a shitty, crime riddled town where I already get endlessly harassed. I have also learned not to mention knitting around any older women, because I get roped into the longest conversations I didn't want in the first place ever. Same with drawing or reading, which I do if I'm on the train. Everyone wants to talk about what I'm drawing, how their cousin's son's wife's daughter is a great drawer, what book I'm reading, how I should read x, etc. I don't feel like you can do anything on public transport aside from listen to music without someone bugging you. I'm fine if it they keep it short, but they never keep it short.

>>5394923
>I just don't want unwanted attention in a shitty, crime riddled town where I already get endlessly harassed

Ah okay
that's a valid reason to be concerned, sorry if I came off as passive-aggressive or judgmental or anything

>>5394937
It's ok, I wasn't offended but thanks for the apology anyway.

>>5394923
i wish you lived where i live public transit wise - almost no one starts any conversations with strangers at all, and most of the ones i witness are either short & polite or involve people who are clearly intoxicated or mentally ill. it used to happen a lot when i was a kid, which is confusing, but once i reached high school i've gotten at most one-minute-long exchanges. even the dude who asked me out on the train politely left for a different seat after i said no.

I wish the mtf general was similar to this one, instead of being an anime picture/gif clusterfuck without any actual discussion about mtf struggles and stuff. Congrats on having a decent general, guys.

>>5395555
Thanks, I guess. You're more than welcome to hang around and chill if you want.

>>5395583
Thanks for welcoming me. I enjoyed reading the posts here, so I might stick around.

>>5395555
>men!
>we know how to be friends!

does anyone know whether the steam holiday sale usually goes into january? i'm worrying about it but don't want to visit /v/ to find out

>>5396127
It ends January 4th 10:00 am PST

>>5396644
thank you so much

>>5396845
No prob

>shopping around for top surgeons
>none of the in-network ones have ftm recon listed or trans pics online
>some have gynecomastia and chest reconstruction
>have to call for info
>stammering and stuttering like an idiot when trying to ask if they do the procedure
>spaghetti everywhere

I've been on T long enough my voice passes which is nice, stupid dysphoria, stupid nerves, stupid consult fees, stupid insurance, stupid everything

>>5385889
>Asian ftm

You must be qt as fug

File: Stuart_Warwick_-_The_Butcher's_Voice.jpg (146KB, 470x470px) Image search: [Google]

146KB, 470x470px

Listening to that Bad Suns song mentioned earlier, I remembered this album from my /mu/ days.

http://stuartwarwick.bandcamp.com/album/the-butchers-voice
Ya'll should check out Man With A Pussy if not the whole album.

>>5397983
Very eerie, love the song. But what's with the Buck Angel album art?

>>5398018
I guess because gender confusion and going outside the gender norms, especially in an FTM sense as far as I can tell, are an album theme. And Buck Angel is the manliest to be born a woman so it works pretty well.

>>5397983
Music boxes/bells/chimes are my weakness; I fucking love this.

Thanks Anon!

>>5372204
i'm about an inch here, but its about a cm. thick. also- Google is your friend.

File: IMG_20151110_14355.jpg (91KB, 378x449px) Image search: [Google]

91KB, 378x449px

>>5386370
>>5387452
>>5389216
>>5397415

Thanks for the reply! I posted a pic on a 'Guess' thread awhile back and for the most part people thought I was either underage or ~18/19 which actually isn't that off, and all of them guessed I was a male. But then again, that's just from a picture which is usually a hit or a miss. I'm also 5'6 which is about average height compared to most of my male Asian friends.
Pic related is the one I posted.

On another note, what are your experiences with weight gain after starting T? I've been having some trouble with trying to gain weight after getting treated for hyperthyroidism. I know everybody is different, but just curious about whether there was a noticeable change and if you had to adjust your diet to compensate. I recently started drinking protein shakes, so hopefully that'll help.

>>5399243
10/10 would boyfriend

File: 1415253338626.jpg (30KB, 368x368px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 368x368px

>>5399243
I hate you for being azn.

>>5399243

>hyperthyroidism

iktfb

Essentially, you have to eat more and try to be lazier. GOMAD is a good start but it's temporary. Eat much more carbs, 4 FULL meals a day is what we're talking, with half of each plate being solid carbs (rice, pasta, potatoes...) with 1/4 being protein (meat...) and 1/4 being veg

That's a basic start, but it's something to get you going. What diets don't take into account is that we're individuals, so we have to train our bodies to a new diet but also be aware of our own needs when it comes to this thing. Experiment a few months and /feel/ out what works for you.

Also lift up heavy things. Muscles are nice to look at, don't let anyone say otherwise.

>>5385150
Hard to say.

>Pre t and hiding gender dysphoria
>Get accused of having fake IDs bars and clubs
>On t for a few years
>Bouncers just ask if I'm LGBT


fuck me I can never win.

>>5399564
>Bouncers just ask if I'm LGBT
"Yes, all of the above." And watch for his reaction.

>>5399243
Cisguy here and do you have skype anon? I could be your weight gain coach.

Qualification: Am fat

>>5395636
I don't get it.

>>5401364
http://youtu.be/3hmlPtRu1SQ

File: 1232434545.jpg (9KB, 200x200px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 200x200px

>>5401428

>>5401428

I don't get why she's bringing up her thick thighs. Muscle thighs are juicy and awesome, skinny thighs make me sick as though you're malnourished

File: 14324.png (80KB, 245x228px) Image search: [Google]

80KB, 245x228px

>tfw you find out one of your online friends you wanted to come out to is a /pol/tard

File: 1420543074987.jpg (60KB, 714x684px) Image search: [Google]

60KB, 714x684px

My therapist wants me to not avoid my anxiety but to sit with it and see how it affects me to better understand how it works. She wants me to pinpoint the most common unhelpful thoughts and the most distressing distressing thoughts.

Is this the moment I have to acknowledge and admit the possibility I might be a tranny...?

>>5401635
To yourself or to your therapist?

Either way, probably, yeah.

>>5401962
Fucking both, man! I was hoping that I'd be able to complete therapy and become a well-adjusted person while allowing this gender crisis to pass in total secrecy!

>>5402042
If you're really trans it's definitely not something you can simply ignore.

>>5402049
Are you implying someone can't not choose to not transition and still be somewhat happy?

>>5402097
That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that it's pretty damn hard to just repress the feelings and pretend that they're not there.

>>5402097
>can't not choose to not transition
Wait, what?

>>5402049
God, this is a fucking mess. If I'm imagining it, I shouldn't be going this crazy. If I'm not imagining it, I'm either going to do nothing about it and suffer or transition and probably suffer. I am so fucking fucked.

>>5401567
mtf just clicking through random threads, but one of my friends is a /pol/tard and reacted just fine. A lot of people with bigoted opinions will change their tone around if it applies to someone they know well as a person and not just as a label

>>5402100
That I can agree with it.

Hey, um. I'm flying out to see my family soon, and I'm gonna be gone for a week, and I'm on a weekly dosage of T. I'm kinda fucking terrified of taking it with me, mostly because I don't want the bottle it's in to break, and I feel a little weird about packing a syringe I guess.
Has anyone flown with T before? Any tips or anything? Am I just asking for my shit to get jacked by some roid-rage TSA agent?
Fuck, I really don't want to skip a week.

File: 1284820679338.jpg (35KB, 554x439px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 554x439px

>>5402134
I hope you're right, and I feel like you are. From what I've gathered from him so far he just seems to dislike tumblr, which is, well, understandable. We definitely have mutual feelings there.

>>5402573
Why don't you jack pack it in with clothes? Wrap it up in layers and layers and layers of shit. That's how people travel with fragile stuff in general.

>>5402606
Probably what I'll do, wrap it and put it in a really strong small box besides to prevent crushing. I'm just bein' nervy about it, wanted to see if anyone had experience doing it before.

I'm taking my luggage into my own hands this trip for sure, I promised I'd bring wine and beer that doesn't ship out of state as well. Literally gonna check an entire extra bag of alcohol, looks like. As long as it's less than 40% ABV, TSA gives no fucks.

>>5402573
A week isn't going to kill you but (last comment)
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php?topic=139237.0

>>5402665
Hmm, thanks. I know it won't kill me, I just. Man. I really do not want to skip a week. I'm so early-on that any time lost feels like losing ground.

I guess my other option is to maybe pre-load a syringe, but all the advice I can find on that is from flipping bodybuilder forums.

>>5402736
Don't pre-load. Make sure you have your prescription with you and you should be fine. They can't deprive people their medication, so don't be sketchy about it, make sure everything is labeled and doesn't look like anything illegal.

>>5402573
I've traveled with it before. You'll most likely get stopped because of the syringe (I don't think you can slip it by even if you wrap it up, even if you try). I didn't have any problems, though, and I was flying from Virginia to Texas.
Do you still have the box your testosterone came in? Because if you have the box with the pharmacy sticker, you'll look that much more legitimate.

>>5402600
I second >>5402134. My dad is really racist, but he's still close friends with a Latino family.
Plus, he already knows that the negative tumblr stereotype doesn't apply to you.

MtF here - would anyone like to swap pelvises?

>>5402966
Yes.

>>5403017
It'd need to fit a 5'9" frame.

>>5402966
Please take my birthing hips they're no use to me.

Reposting from thg because I'm fucking desperate.

Is there such thing as estrogen blockers without prescription (legally)? Would the ones for cis men work on me?

Fuck, is there anything, hormones wise or something, even if just a bit, for FtMs that doesn't fucking require me 4 or more years of waiting and me constantly being checked for fucking validity not to mention they could get taken away as ~profeshunuls~ see fit? So tired of this fucking trash place. Fucking fuckitty fuck. Fuck.

I know working out is a huge boost but having mild fibromyalgia really doesn't blend well with that.

Fuck.

>>5402966
Is this even possible?

>>5403195
Inhouse has estrogen blockers. I've seriously contemplated giving them a try myself but I don't have the money or the balls to try.

File: 1441314681992.jpg (65KB, 700x1050px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 700x1050px

>>5403029
i'm 5'9 with hips like pic rel
pls help

>>5403242
Add my Skype. We'll get the transplant going.

>>5403221
Does it? Link me? But inhouse requires prescription now anyway, apparently...

Fuck, man...

>>5403259
https://www.inhousepharmacy.vu/c-95-Womans-HRT.aspx
under "anti-estrogens"

I've heard conflicting information re: prescriptions and it's probably best to ask MTFs since diy is never really on our radar.

http://strawpoll.me/6289225

>>5402573
My boyfriend has flown with his hormones and never been stopped. Take the precaution of bringing prescription labels that clearly indicate they are legal and belong to you, and pack them carefully so they're not rolling around. They're just like any other restricted medication, and its perfectly legal to transport for personal use.

File: image.jpg (1MB, 2448x3060px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2448x3060px

my s/o and i smoked, found old decorations from our first apartment and decided to make an xmas tree to put them on...

File: image.jpg (1MB, 2448x3060px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2448x3060px

>>5404216

+ gypsy chilling on my hand + preening by my mom's tree this morning...

>>5401635

probably... denial and ignoring shit never makes it go away, and if you're obsessing about it to the point where it's causing you significant anxiety well... why keep trying to ignore it? it's not helping you at all to keep doing what you're doing right?

>>5402573
Travel all the time with my prescription in my checked baggage. I've never had any issue with that, the bottle on them is pretty damn thick too, you couldn't break it even if you hucked it bare at a wall. Just pack it snuggly with your clothes.

As for taking it in your carry-on, it's totally legal to take needles and syringes onboard, but they have to have their protective cases on, and so long as you have the box your T came in with your name and prescribing doctors name you'll be fine going through TSA. You just might have to pull it out for them to see is all.

>>5404216
Similar story here, flatmates and I got drunk we ended up having to go to CVS at 11pm for decorations, and decorated our 3 foot tree with 6 strings of lights (we still feel like we need more). We named it Griswold.

>>5404216
>>5404585
Last year me and my roommate drew a christmas tree on the wall because we couldn't afford anything. We even drew presents under them.

>>5404593
That kind of reminds of the year my mom and I decorated a Ficus Plant because we were so low on cash. Hard times call for creative measure.

File: 3 (1).jpg (93KB, 574x700px) Image search: [Google]

93KB, 574x700px

>Put out applications like six months ago for all my colleges
> Get accepted into them all except for my college of choice, which I don't hear back from
> Wait to hear back from college of choice and don't commit to any of the other schools
> Assume I'm not going to be accepted, disappointed but also picked up a job at a local coffee shop where everyone is super nice to me
> Get rejection letter in mail, finally. Sad but I figure I'll save up for top surgery and reapply for fall.
> Yesterday afternoon get an email telling me my application had been rejected because the new system they were using only sent half of my transcripts
> Three weeks before classes start, but I've been accepted
> Up all night feeling terrible that I have to back out on new job, but boss is super super nice about it.
> So now I have three weeks to find housing, register for my classes, move, and cope with the fact this will be my last Christmas at home

I'm happy, but I feel like I haven't processed a lot of the emotions yet. I'm going to miss my cats.

>>5404585

you should take pics when it has enough lights...

we were initially gonna put up a fake tree, but my s/o started talking about how dirty it probably was, and then i thought about it too much and didn't want it in our bedroom or to touch it... but we still wanted to do something for christmas so this one is silver and white lace + ornaments + lights over this old, giant, wooden easel thing...

>>5404593

that's pretty cool though, i just like having something done...

>>5404600

probably looked nice though

i've always liked it when people decorate other kinds of trees... in brooklyn a lot of people wrap the dead looking trees at the edge of the sidewalk completely in lights and shit... i've seen it done here, in the poconos, too but it looks terrible like the lights are just kinda thrown in like no one gave a shit how they landed...

though brooklyn when i was a kid was more impressive as far as decorations go particularly bensonhurst... it was more heavily catholic italians, and they'd fucking go all out... like people sized statues and entire set ups people could walk through and shit... now it's more chinese so the neighborhood doesn't at all look the same this time of year

>>5404946

that's rough, but it can work out alright... you just gotta really focus on getting shit done...

missing pets sucks though, i had to give my dog to my mother when i was in my first apartment (he couldn't be alone, he was fine with it as a puppy but i spent a month in europe and my family went to my uncle's vacation house in upstate ny for a week without telling me during that and when i came back home he was weird as shit about being left alone) and then my s/o's mom made us do the same with our cat when we ended up needing to stay there (she was just "too allergic" meanwhile she has 2 cats now, and has let his sister's gf bring hers when she's visited... so it was literally just about not letting us bring our pet cuz she's like that) after living with a christian prophet (self proclaimed... he never said anything of value and is an atheist now) and an alcoholic didn't work out (this was after we lost our first apartment cuz our landlord needed it to be close to the hospital for physical therapy after he got the shit beaten out of him in his office one night)

at least you left on good terms at work and can maybe work out some shit where you can pick up shifts over the summer and shit when you're not at school if you go back home...

Hey guys

I want to meet FtMs, are there any good websites?

Im a chaser and looking for FtMs that are up for that sort of thing

>>5405211
If you want hookups, check grindr and craigslist(surprisingly).

>>5399313
Wow, thanks for the tips! I'll definitely keep that in mind.

>>5400201
Haha, I don't but thanks for the offer anon.

>>5405228
Is Grindr trans tribe for ftms or mtfs?

>>5405815
Both, but I see more ftms than mtfs.

>>5405856
In my area it seems to be mostly CD and chasers... So is this one of those 'women invading men's spaces' things that will never get talked about since trans girls pre-op have the D?

>>5405856
>>5405864
I'm not gonna lie, I have no idea why any trans person, ftm or mtf, would be interested in using these sites, but maybe that's just me.

>>5404946
Weird question, did you mention being trans in any of your essays?

>>5405877
I'm on grindr and scruff. It's ok but I am also very picky and not fond a hookups, but I've met some dudes off both and it went a'ight.

File: u guys r nice.gif (1MB, 225x400px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 225x400px

>>5404428
>>5403882
>>5402922
>>5402870
Thanks so much for the help, guys. I really appreciate it.

File: 3MYkU.jpg (65KB, 480x270px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 480x270px

>>5405173
thanks, I'm sure things will end up okay it's just a whirlwind of stuff to get done.

>>5405888
Yes and no. Because basically I had to do applications in two parts as a transfer student, first my general college application and then the application for my undergrad program. I did mention being transgender in the general college application, along with all of my work experience. I basically weaseled it in saying I wanted to represent LGBT people and encourage minority youths with my degree.

I didn't even bring it up for my program essay. But I was already talking about my sick mother so I felt like shoehorning it in would have felt forced. Plus I was applying for a SCEM program and essentially the prompt was why I wanted to study the subject. I also feel it's worth mentioning that I haven't changed my legal name yet despite being a year and a half on T and having a beard. I'll probably do that over this next few weeks, though. So I can't tell you how much of my getting accepted was affirmative action. Being transgender might've been a factor, having a female name might've been a factor. I don't even know if my undergrad program read the general essays.

My GPA was on the lower side of things, but I'd taken a ton of extra courses and gotten all A's and B's the last few semesters. I also had relevant lab experience and a really good essay. Depending on where you're going to school and what you're going to school for I wouldn't be afraid to mention it, but if you're struggling to squeeze it in where it's not really relevant it might be better to just skip it.

File: Image121620152039531.jpg (354KB, 819x1595px) Image search: [Google]

354KB, 819x1595px

>>5405128
>>5404585 here
I took a few photos through the process of putting it together, but the camera on my phone's quality is so bad it wasn't able really able to pick up all the lights too well.
(this is about 3-4 strings in)

I'm wondering if I should go ahead and invest some cash into an actual camera since I don't use my cellphone enough to really update it for the sake of a decent camera.

>>5407021

nice...

i have a camera, but i use my phone all the time instead cuz it ends up being easier (mostly cuz i use my phone often) + i hate bags and i hate carrying a bunch of shit on me, and i'm only capable of keeping track of a limited number of things...

like carrying a camera and a phone at the same time is exactly how i lost my last phone in a marsh... i was high and focused on not losing the camera and then lost the phone...

but if you like taking pics, and don't feel like a phone with a better camera is a decent investment then you should get one... if only cuz pictures are nice to have, and enjoyable to take...

ugh, why are so many academic papers behind paywalls that my library doesn't pay for
i'm not a student, i'm just genuinely interested in certain research, and too many of these journals & institutions are too focused on greed & not enough on collaboration

>>5407177
I was pretty into photography as a teenager, and wouldn't mind taking up the hobby again. Though I'm probably going to end up getting a cheaper compact camera for everyday carry, and get into film instead since that's where my interest is.

I can relate to the losing things while trying not to lose your camera, back when I carried a DSLR around with me I'd end up forgetting all kinds of shit, lost many good jackets / phones because of it.

>>5407219
What are you looking for? I'm sure I can get onto Jstor and a couple other databases to download some stuff for you if you want. I thought my database access was going to be suspended while I'm not attending uni but seems not.

>>5407332
i'm not sure if these most recent ones are actually on jstor, they're mostly social sciences stuff whose abstracts were linked on tumblr as proof of something or other without giving us enough info about the full text to know if they're decent research. thank you for the offer, though.

>>5407384
Gotta wonder where these Tumblr chucklefucks are getting access to institutions that are locking other folks out. You can check out bookzz.org too btw. I'm always so eager to get and spread information on black market academia.

>>5407384
>social sciences stuff
They intentionally lock this shit to avoid peer-reviews from people outside their circlejerk. Academia has lost all traces of its credibility desu.

File: cathybrennan.jpg (92KB, 824x1074px) Image search: [Google]

92KB, 824x1074px

Whats the one thing you don't want to look like, or are afraid to look like ftmg?

i'm 18, dependent on my unaccepting parents, so not on t, and i'm terrified of getting old woman dyke face

>>5407609
all pre T ftms look like dykes when they try to go boymode

>>5407691
>old woman dyke face

>>5407707
eh some ftms are doomed.

>>5407609
If you ever get full beard you can hide most of your face with it.

>>5407324

you should do it then, get yourself one for christmas or something... if you're interested in it why not?

yeah... i get so "can't lose the camera" that everything else just disappears... worst thing i lost was my phone though, but i was pretty whatever about it when it happened

>>5407756
I'm looking around, been browsing some tech review sites, and /p/ to see what I could find as far as decent cameras for both film and throw aways in my price range. May end up getting both in the next few months.

The worst experience I ever had was losing my bag which had my other lenses, glasses, and wallet in it - thankfully I was able to find it after a few hours of looking. Still get a sinking feeling when I think about how much of a nightmare that would've been if I wasn't able to find it.

>>5407789

now i kinda feel like digging up my old 35 mm and finding film for it... i prefer film to digital shit, i like the look and i like actually developing pics too... been a long time though... found it a while back and my s/o and i were all excited about it, but ended up not doing anything instead...

seems like a waste in winter though... everything is fucking sad outside...

>>5407879
>>5407789

+ that must've sucked, at least you found it though...

>>5407444
oh, i forgot about them, thank you

>>5407879
Digital has its merits, but I prefer film a lot more, the look and the development process is a lot more pleasing to me than messing with digital cameras. 35mm is basically what I'm looking to get, always really dug the way photos shot on them looked.

Winter can be good if you know what to look for, it can lead to some pretty atmospheric scenes, but you really have to commit to looking for decent spots to get something interesting otherwise it kind of just comes out looking like family ski vacation photos.

>>5407948

yeah i like the process too... working in a dark room is pretty relaxing... i think i actually have a few older cameras kicking around, the 35 mm i'm thinking of, and at least one more of those + some other shit...

my s/o and i are trying to seriously downsize shit at this point, so i've got all this shit to look through (cameras, typewriters, art, books, old video games and consoles etc) cuz it's like retarded at this point... like we have one of those fucking super 8 cameras and shit too and when are we ever gonna fucking even use that? rambling, but if you don't find shit i might actually have something you're looking for that i wouldn't mind parting with

i like digital in the sense that it's convenient, but it's not the same at all... it's like when i try to type instead of writing with a notebook and a pen except i mind it less...

my thing with winter is honestly just that i don't like going out when it's cold, and i find it generally depressing... the first day i see anything green after winter every year is pretty much a holiday for me, and i actually celebrate it... drinks and whatnot (like a normal say except i call it a holiday really)

there's like shit to take pictures of like the alaskan cedars here are beautiful and look amazing covered in snow, and like deer are cute in winter + like the bayberry that's all around here is nice and all cuz it's all just branches and thorns + bright red berries this time of year... but getting good pictures means going outside, and being cold and eh...

i could see what you mean though, winter pictures do have that kinda quality to them often...

>>5408086
Agh man super 8's are something I always wanted to try my hand at, but I don't really know what I'd do with it if I ended up with one, just more of a test run to see how it's comparable to other cameras / video cameras I've used in the past for shits and giggles.

What model is your 35mm? if I can't find exactly what I'm lookin for I might take you up on the offer

I used to hangout in the dark room quite a lot in high school, it was really relaxing just being able to sit there and wait for photos to develop while I drew or whatever else I felt like.

I still have most of my digital equipment, my dslr and a few lenses but, It's far too heavy to carry around with me if it isn't for projects and pretty out dated at this point as far as digital cameras go (probably can get better quality on just throw aways now compared to early 2000's dslrs).

Winter photos are really reliant on light honestly, if you have some good or atleast interesting lightning you can make for some pretty cool photos. but I get ya not wanting to stand around in the cold to get a good shot, it isn't too bad where I am but.. being from a shit suburban area I'd have to really push to find something atleast slightly worth my time to shoot which means way more time in the cold.

>>5408146

we actually never even used it, we got it thinking we'd get around to fucking around with it, and then just haven't used it... at least it's cool looking though cuz that's like the only way i've appreciated it at this point...

i would actually have to come across it to tell you... last time i saw it i was like "wonder where the other one is" and "maybe i'll use this some time" and that was the extent to me noticing it... i haven't even thought about it 'til just now...

my s/o and i went to a photography class together... some place in chinatown, it was an excuse to have to see each other for sure once a week cuz his mom hated him having anyone he was close to, and is far from my biggest fan... and a lot of the time we skipped out and wandered around chinatown instead... or like snuck into his house to fuck, but i did enjoy being in the dark room, and developing pics... in hs i just wasn't usually in the school, and i didn't take photography there cuz my mom was always bitching at me about graduating so i always just went with creative writing classes cuz i knew i could get away with doing absolutely nothing, never showing up and the teachers would just pass me anyway...

like i had a teacher let me do anything i wanted, i just had to keep writing some shit i'd been writing cuz she liked it that much that i got to do fuckall while everyone else had assignments... or like just not show up to either of her classes... she just kinda graded me on the writing i was gonna do anyway on my own... and i really hated school it was boring as shit so i prefered to just make it easy...

what kinda shit do you draw? i always love it when people can draw, cuz i suck at it and don't have the patience to attempt to get better...

i get cold pretty easy, and i can't stand layers... which sucks during winter

>>5408345
>>5408146

+

where i'm at now is this weird gated woodland community, so there's like houses and no stores, but if you wander off the road in the right place you can find places that make you forget any other people exist... and then we also have shit like deer, bears, raccoons, and like fucking eagles and shit around... those parts of it can be beautiful, but the roadside is pretty fucking dismal

>>5408345
I'm pretty thankful my parents didn't really care too much about my hobby's / what extra curricular I was in as long as the end of the day they got the future doctor they thought I'd be (funnily enough, I'm premed by choice/ actually enjoying medicine so we both got lucky on that). I used photography class as a period of time to just forget about my academics for awhile and chill / get to be outside during class, and it was a hell of alot better of a choice than art class (which I failed 2 years in a row being a stubborn fuck.)

I draw a lot of landscapes / trying to learn how to do architecture, prefer to use ink over any other medium atm. I've always had a soft spot for drawing, almost went into it as a profession but decided against it because I didn't want to turn my hobby into an actual job.

File: FB04VCg.gif (997KB, 500x278px) Image search: [Google]

997KB, 500x278px

Any recommendations for boxer briefs or trunks that don't have a super large crotch in them? I don't pack so I don't really need it, and it looks unflattering. I was going to try the trunks at H&M but I'm not sure. They looked modest enough for a fair price.

>>5408502
Gril here. The guys I went down on wore Polo briefs. They were a bit large in the crotch department.

>>5408378

my mom just wanted me to graduate, and my dad and i never spoke about anything cuz he pretty much only ever speaks to me when he feels like yelling at someone over pretty much anything... so i never had that placed on me... i mean he definitely would've beaten the shit out of me for failing, but that was pretty whatever considering... school was pretty shit for me other than the social aspect really

cuz right from the beginning it sucked, and eventually behaving while there got boring... and i mean like immediate levels of shit... first day of school i never went to pre-k so i got put into a class where none of the kids could read and shit, and i was already grade levels ahead in shit... ended up doing a bunch of separate work with this creepy spanish woman... and anyway... i basically found out young how to get through school without doing much of anything, and how to get on teacher's good sides even while getting kicked out of their classroom on a regular basis for being disruptive... and i just did that 'til i graduated

the first time i went to college my dad refused to help me with it, and i couldn't get financial aid cuz of that whole shit with your parent's money counting for you... and the second time i had money coming in so i was able to pay for shit, but i was stuck living in my s/o's mom's house at the time... and we were visiting my family for easter and she just kinda called and told us most of our things had been in the yard for the last few days cuz she was kicking us out... so i had to drop out that time too

that is pretty lucky all around though... and pre-med is cool what do you wanna specialize in?

how did you fail art class exactly?

landscapes are cool, though i prefer architecture... i learned how to appreciate architecture getting dragged to church every sunday as a kid... art too i suppose... i can give catholicism that, but yeah... there's a lot of beautiful churches in brooklyn at least...

>>5408527
>>5408378

ink is nice... i think it's shit that a lot of times people don't have any respect for art that isn't oil paint on a canvas...

i could see not wanting a hobby to be a job though, kinda destroys the reason you do it...

>>5408521
Good info, I actually had the exact same experience with polo. I'll try to go pick up some boxers at H&M tomorrow and get back to you all.

>>5408527
Agh my dad and I barely spoke when I was a teenager, and by the time I was in college we were so distant there was no point in keeping tabs on the other, it was mostly my mom who kept an eye on me as far as school goes (she's since lightened up a hell of a lot which is great.)

I was always a pretty good student, I worked hard, did my best and usually enjoyed going to class to learn, though because I was really preoccupied with studies / hobbies my social life was pretty terrible until probably halfway through highschool when i finally made some friends though i blame that more on my with being alone / not really wanting to put in the effort to make friends than school itself.

I kind of understand the whole financial aid issue, my dad has quite a bit of money but because my parents are divorced and I don't have any relationship with him outside of me still being on his insurance it's hard to figure out what to put on the paperwork and becomes ridiculously complicated when I try and talk to anyone in the family about it.

I'm most likely going into psychiatry, either that or neuroscience. Haven't quite decided between the two just yet (and i have a few years left before i have to)

I failed because i just didnt like being told what to do when it came to drawing, I wanted to draw what I wanted to without being bossed around on how to do it, so i just ended up doing none of the work.

File: 1449145088661.png (471KB, 598x1021px) Image search: [Google]

471KB, 598x1021px

qt MtF here
1x (one) qt Australian FtM bf pls

File: 1388694937673.jpg (144KB, 456x502px) Image search: [Google]

144KB, 456x502px

>looking at names
>'guy'
>mfw

>>5408502
honestly i haven't noticed much of a bulge on most boxer briefs i wear, but maybe i haven't been paying attention. i can say for sure that exofficio (fancy hiking brand) boxer briefs don't bulge, though. i just probably wear the waistband higher than most men.

File: 1434910374898.jpg (51KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

51KB, 500x500px

>>5409241

>>5408502
abercrombie?

>>5408564

sorry for the really late reply, smoked more then ended up reading to my s/o before we passed out...

weird how you can be raised by someone and barely speak to them... were they divorced when you were younger or is that more recent? at least you had your mom though, that's how i've always felt when it's come to my parents anyway like "well i've got one" though my parents have been married for 30+ years at this point...

i actually got good grades most of the time in spite of being a shit student... like i had a full scholarship into a school i got kicked out of, and ap classes and awards etc, but i've just never had that drive or the capacity to be that person who studied and was responsible... and i actually really respect that sort of thing, but nah... i definitely lack something people who can just do that have

friends came easy though, i went to three high schools, and i still have friends and talk to people from each of them... i used to have people i didn't really know tell me they missed me when i hadn't been to class in a week or so, cuz class was "boring" without me apparently... but i was that kid who drove teachers completely crazy so i was entertaining i guess... it was unintentional

yeah it's stupid, i don't get the logic in basing a person's funds for their education off of how much someone else makes when that person isn't at all obligated to help them financially... and in a lot of cases isn't... it's frustrating to say the least...

that's cool, i imagine those are both pretty interesting fields particularly from a trans perspective... is that part of why it interests you or is it separate from that?

totally respectable reason for failing btw...

Hi I'm 145cm pre-t. Am I fucked up?

>>5409638
Unless you're a pre-teen/early teens then yes.

my friend just got out of an abusive household, and the abuser's partner just wrote a callout post calling my friend abusive, listing things that were basically uncherubic reactions to the abuse they've had to deal with. the partner isn't in on it, they're being abused too & probably afraid to be left alone with this dude, but i just never realized that such a thing could happen so easily. i've seen abusers directly pretend their victims are abusive, but i haven't really seen it happen between victims (victim blaming yeah, but not accusations of abuse).

File: 1437675848732.png (29KB, 633x758px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 633x758px

I have extremely delayed puberty (runs in the family + meds side effects + health problems overall) and I wouldn't be surprised if to this day I'm still going through it - I still look like I'm 10.

Thing is, yesterday I noticed my tits are getting bigger/fuller and my nipples puffier and I do not like this at all. It might be bloating from menstruation cycle, but I dunno.

I'm freaking the fuck out because I was planning on keyhole surgery but I'm still gonna have to wait a few years (legal shit and money problems) and I'm not on T (have to wait for that shit because of laws too).
My sister and my mother are pretty fucking busty and they have stretched nipples/aerolas and I am freaking the fuck out. I don't want that shit. No.

Is there anything I can do to remedy this or is all I can do sit back and watch me and my body getting destroyed?

hey guys, i'm intersex and i'm transitioning to female now but i've previously taken T for 9-10 years and I've dated trans guys in the past, can i hang here, i'm essentially a detransitioner with fucked up genitals. i kinda enjoy talking about what T did to me because I started at 16 and although it made me want to kill myself, results were rapid and undeniable.

>>5409792
we welcome trans women generally unless they're terrible, so there's no reason you couldn't hang here too

>>5409861
pre-T i looked just like my ex did pre-T, but 9 years made me a pretty sexy guy... with the body of a weird looking teenage girl, so I feel some of you guys. it was really hard trying to fit in and be a guy when you have narrow shoulders and wide hips and most boy clothes don't fit right and draw attention to your fem body.

>>5409769
Can you go on blockers?

>>5410358
No. Not legally anyway. And don't blockers fuck you up anyway, for FtMs?

File: image.jpg (1MB, 2448x3059px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 2448x3059px

>>5409692

i don't completely understand what's going on in this post... who did what?

>>5409769

what legal reasons? honestly there's not much you can do to fight the natural course your body decides to take... suffering and then trying to fix what you can later tends to be the option... which is shit but yeah...

>>5409792

sure why not? not everyone here is a transguy anyway...

unrelated: gypsy is over her fear of my mom's xmas tree... might just be cuz it's a fake one now, the real one went to shit oddly fast so we had to take it down and put up a different one today... she was chilling on my shoulder and decided to check shit out

it was weird taking down a tree before christmas, even though we put a new one up immediately...

>>5393539
I suppose I'm being a diva. Just need to see where this goes and you're right I should probably just not be so cheap and buy one.

>>5411330
uh yeah that's confusing, let's give them names. my friend joey left a house with an abusive roommate ross and ross' (also being abused) partner phoebe, and phoebe wrote a callout post calling joey an abuser because joey would sometimes react to ross' abuse angrily or would not get things done that he promised to do, etc.

>>5411605
lel

>>5411605

i thought that might've been what you meant, but giving them names helps yeah...

that all sounds... dramatic though... and like shit to stay far away from

>>5411605
>>5409692
Oh, no. DARVO is common, if not standard.

It's awful, but there doesn't seem to be a better solution yet than documenting the abuse (anything from conversations--if it's legal to record--to physical injuries to screencaps) and just running the fuck away. Abusive people rarely change willingly, especially when they have active enablers.

>>5411319
What country are you in? You can get them online for relatively cheap at places like inhouse and they aren't a controlled substance like testosterone.

And no, blockers are exactly what they give possible trans kids to stop puberty so they can decide when they're older. You're fine as long as you're not on them for a wicked long time and make sure you get enough calcium/vitamins/don't get too depressed.

This girl I've been joking around with and flirting with online doesn't know I'm trans yet. I never expected anything to actually come out of it because try to avoid relationships, but I somehow got roped into this shit and I feel like a fucking moron. I don't know what to do and now I've gotten so attached to her I know I'm gonna get rejected if I tell her.

My running away instincts are beginning to kick in but I just can't do that to someone. I know how it feels to have someone just up and leave without telling you why. At the same time I almost feel like it would spare us both the humiliation, especially since we have a group of friends.

Why did I have to be trans. Time to an hiro.

>>5409617
It's alright i was pretty busy today so you're getting a bit of a late reply too.

they got divorced when i was around 11/12, but by that time my dad had been leaving on and off for long periods of time for work so I was used to him not being around. Yeah my mom and I have always been pretty close despite the rough years, her and my brother are pretty much all i got as far as close family goes.

i dont know what it is, but I really enjoy studying, it can be really stressful sometimes but i always enjoyed cracking open a textbook and working out questions for a few hours, enough to where i'll do it for fun on my breaks between classes.

agh i was that kid that alot of people knew of in highschool, but really didn't try to talk to me unless they were in my classes / needed something from me. kind of just got the reputation of just being really nice but didn't end up with alot of friends (the few i had i'm still friends with though so that's a plus I suppose)

It is actually feel like either would be a great field to go into in combination with my own experiences as a trans person, that and a few other family members of mine are doctors as well.

>>5370409
What would you suggest,
to someone severely dysphoric, androgynous and able to pass as a feminine male pre t, with 0 friends and 0 support.

but, is too afraid to transition and end up and unlovable freak, that everyone is too disgusted to be around and not be able to go back?
suicide?

>>5412116
Therapy for dat internalised transphobia

>>5411887
Poortugal. Doesn't inhouse require a prescription now though?

>>5411330
I dunno, I might be wrong, but I don't think blockers even exist here.

I love your bird

>>5412145
Not him, but man have I ever noticed how much a lot of us shoot ourselves in the foot with internalized transphobia. I repressed that shit like crazy for years being terrified everyone would hate or be disgusted by me, yet every single person I've come out to so far has been beyond supportive.

>>5412254
I think it works if you check that you're gonna fax it

>>5412116
Get yo self to an LGBT support group and transition if you have severe dysphoria. If that doesn't work in 5 years, re-evaluate an hero, what do you have to lose?

>>5412022

why are you so sure she's not gonna be cool with it? people can be surprising... don't run away though, you'll just make her feel like shit, and probably yourself too... tell her something else like you found someone else or some shit instead if you won't come out to her, or just keep it light and she'll move on eventually...

but it's not guaranteed failure or some shit, i get being nervous and scared but you never know...

>>5412052

my dad was always working too (still is), but my mom and i are close... i've always gotten along with her better, so i've never really cared about not having a relationship at all with my dad... i'm close to both my bros too, and a few of my uncles, one aunt, and a couple of my cousins as far as family goes... like i'm out to them and they've been great about it... so i can't really complain when it comes to that

it's funny cuz like i'll read botany books and shit when i'm bored cuz i feel like it, but when i'm told i have to do something and given a time frame i just lose all desire...like even with things i like, i'm not sure what exactly is wrong there...

that's a plus, quality over quantity anyway...i would talk to people i absolutely hated and shit too just to pass time, and i'd tell them as much usually...

that's cool...a lot of people in my family decided to become teachers...like that's what most of my cousins are doing + my little bro (my dad helped him pay for college, got him a car, etc cuz he's my dad's favourite) can't imagine wanting to go to school for years to spend even more time in school when you're done, but yeah...do you wanna work with trans people at all if you do the psych thing?

>>5412116

i'd tell them to stop being dramatic (easier said than done i know) that plenty of people don't care and finding people who will love you isn't hard even if you're trans and fucked up etc

and suicide is permanent, can't exactly go back and change your mind...isn't there shit you wanna experience?

File: image.jpg (123KB, 636x777px) Image search: [Google]

123KB, 636x777px

>>5412294

i honestly don't know anything about blockers for transguys... only ever heard of them for transgirls

she'd probably love you too, she loves everyone she meets... even complete strangers when i take her for walks or to the store...

>>5412652
yeah I'm out to most of my family, they don't seem to mind and enjoy my company and all that, just a matter of not really being around a lot to get to know me / get to know them personally that keeps me from considering them all that close to me.

I really like to do math in my free time, the challenge (and me not exactly "getting it" naturally) is fun for me. But I get what you're saying, I'm that way with anything creative I don't like being told what to do at all even if it sounds like a good idea.

I'd like to work with trans people if possible, the dream is being able to work with HRC at some point, and maybe working in a shelter type environment as an on staff psychiatrist/counselor.

>>5412847

i get that... i have family that i haven't seen since i was 13 and it's like they know shit and whatever, and i know they don't give a shit... but they don't actually know me

for me it's more... if i don't feel like doing something i can't focus at all on it, even if i like it if i'm not in the mood then it's not happening... and i've always been like that... with everything, and that's definitely a shit quality... but yeah

for me it's more like... i can't be told what to do cuz that's just not gonna work with the way i function, it's not even about being stubborn

i'm cool with listening to feedback and ideas with creative shit, but it's probably not gonna be what i do just cuz i stop thinking and just do whatever... i'm much better at things when i don't think than when i do

that sounds like it'd be nice... fulfilling at least

>>5412354
I'm not expecting anyone around me to particularly take it badly (except I'm going to disappoint my mum but I feel like it was only a matter of time), which is the only reason I've resolved to try and face this instead of taking it to my grave.

Totally unrelated, whatever happened to DisabledAnon?

>>5413706
Probably disappeared up his own arse

>>5412652
>why are you so sure she's not gonna be cool with it?
I don't know. It's probably more just that fear in the back of my mind. She's mature and in her late 20's and seems pretty damn open minded, I just...fuck, I don't know. I hate myself for being trans so much it feels like everyone else will too. I wish I could just tell her and have this fucking weight off my shoulders but goddamn is it ever hard.

>>5414830

i get that, but if you're scared to tell her shit it's cuz you really fucking care... and if you really fucking care you should probably tell her... the longer you wait the more scared you'll get and she'll either be ok with it or she won't

and she'll understand why you didn't say it i'm sure

but the sooner you tell her, the better you'll feel... and the less it'll hurt

if you care more then and she takes it bad you're gonna fucking be hurt more

but in all honesty you shouldn't just immediately assume she will be repulsed by it just cuz you feel shit about yourself

>>5415038
Yeah I know, it's a bad habit. I'm just getting really tired of all this anxiety coming from hiding being trans from people. It's the worst. My stomach is constantly in fucking knots.

Any of you homos playing any games right now? I'm playing SMT: Strange Journey.

>>5415389
I recently downloaded Neko Atsume if it counts.

>>5415096

yeah i get that, it's something that's hard to not think about cuz people could have such strong opinions about it

but i mean shit's gonna go the way it goes, and you can't control that...

>>5415389
i've been replaying shadowrun dragonfall in order to get the rest of the achievements and it's going pretty well. it's sometimes hard to roleplay a terrible person, though.

>>5415896
Yeah, I get that. I'm playing full LAW in Strange Journey which means I'm YWHW's boot licking lackey, removing free will from Man so they may worship him as one. It's kind of a shitty ending.

>>5416191
haha i don't think i could handle being terrible unless i was getting achievements for it

Hey /ftmg/, anon from /mtfg/ here, I'm in College, and I know this FtM guy that called me a fetishist since I'm MtF and he claims that mtf dysphoria doesn't exist. How do I deal with this guy? Thanks.

>>5416256
Sounds like a bit of a dickhead. The equivalent of mtfs who come into the general bemoaning ftms who destroy their ~beautiful bodies

probably nothing you can do, just ignore him

>>5415389
dragonage inquisition. i'm just running round taking screencaps of stuff.

>>5416256
don't even bother with him.

>>5415389
Been playing through Bastion and a bit of Memelands Pre Sequel on the side. Also messing around with Cloud a bunch in Smash.

My friends are all at christmas parties and I'm alone. Hold me?

>>5416256
>mtf dysphoria doesn't exist
Haha what the fuck. How can any legitimate trans person ever think this kind of horseshit.

>>5405808
>Haha, I don't but thanks for the offer anon.

Okay... ;_;

>>5416256
>how do I deal with this guy
Don't.