/tlg/ - Trans-Lesbian General

>tfw ywn pass
>tfw ywn have a gf

>>5335113
Not an imperial inspection, at least

>>5333032
tl;dr please

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yall huge nerds

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I'm up for that star love

>>5335291
oh baby

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>>5335131
OK, so I have a brain that can easily munch on complex stuff.

>wrong previous thread in the OP
>stormtroopers with breastplates
worst tlg

>>5335655

Agree, with not deleted is shit edition?

Do I have DID, /tlg/?

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Fired my brain reading endocrine system stuff. I'm still trying to figure out why I have a couple good days, then crash and burn for a day or two. It is part of what made me unemployable. Lately I've been more crash and burn than good. So I'm doing lots of research. I did figure out my spironolactone may be making things worse. It interferes with aldosterone production

BTW, in the past I've never had good resolution of it with any doc. My suspicions have been that it is thyroid or adrenal related.

does anyone else think girls are qt

>>5336717
yep!!!

>>5336590
Paper on Spironolactone and aldosterone biosynthesis
http://press.endocrine.org/doi/pdf/10.1210/jcem-52-6-1057
>Reduction in PA and further elevation in its precursors during the second 5-day period of spironolactone therapy suggests inhibition of aldosterone biosynthesis during this phase of treatment in normal man.
That would make you overly tired among other things.

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>>5335259

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>>5337054
>tfw im too tall to be the alphys for an undyne

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>>5337060
I don't know that feel.
I always wanted to be the tall one and even tho I turned out to be 6' I'd still rather have something like three inches extra.

>>5337094
I'm slightly taller than you and I wish I was like 5' or a bit over that. Blah

>>5337094
>wanting to be taller than 6 foot

Jebus. I'm only 5'9 and I feel overly tall.

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>>5337099
:(
Get a buff gf who can lift you nontheless.

>>5337120
I don't understand that kind of self-consciousness at all. Is it about passing? Being taller actually helps by camouflaging male proportions to a degree.

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>>5337133
>Get a buff gf who can lift you nontheless.
They're pretty rare already and the ones that have anything in common with me are more rare than unicorns. To stack the odds even further I live in a remote country

>>5337133
idk, I'm always happy when I see taller girls than me.

>>5337133
I don't know, when I see tall girls I don't really think feminine.

>>5337133
My main 'male proportion' is my height so yeah. Even if I had been born a girl I would be unhappy being over 6' so it's not just about passing
>but tall women can be beautiful too
They can romanticize fucking anything. If you don't have gorgeous long legs and a maneater attitude your height is pretty much all negative.

trans lesbians are just in denial of their cocklust "sure i like to dress like girl but at least im not gay!!"

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I'm not gay, I swear, I like girls!

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>>5337139
I hope you find somebody that meets all your standards.

>>5337152
How do you come to that conclusion?

>>5337164
Looks like I stuck a nerve. Height is not inherently masculine.
People have different tastes. I for one would never date anybody shorter than 5'6 and that's my absolute lower limit.

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>>5337264
>Height is not inherently masculine.
It's predominantly masculine trait on humans though. Especially the 6'+ sort of height.
>People have different tastes
This is the main issue I guess, I dont find height attractive and I definitely dont like it on myself. Makes me feel unattractive and makes passing harder. Also like I whined in a previous thread and probably this one too, people who like tall bland subs are few and far between.

Enough whining, hope you girls have a good day.

>>5336590
It's pretty well known that Spiro fucks with your Aldesterone, that's why I couldn't take it, as I already have low levels of it, Cypro is more potent on reducing testosterone without completely fucking your aldosterone though. Spriro gave me dry skin, dry mouth even at a low dose as 100mg a day, doing 200mg was unbearable, regardless of how much water I drank, while 100mg of Cypro which is high, but now finally now nukes my testosterone, I only get one dry spot on my face, but other than that I'm good. I really should ask my doctor about my low levels of Aldosterone though, as you do have ways to restore it.
Sorry that you have to live in Spiroburgerclapland

So, internet HRT is legit after all.
4mg Estrofem and 300mg Spiractin per day.
Testosterone 4.8nmol/L, Estradiol 257nmol/L.

>>5337302
Sorry, Estradiol 257 pmol/L
>inb4 that level is 1000x too high

>>5337302
Kind of makes me want to get bloodwork done just to see if I'm doing selfmedding right.

>>5337302
I think you want to up your estrogen to 6mg to 8mg, trial both doses for 2 weeks to see if they give better effects, for me I saw good breast growth at 6mg, but less at 8mg, but barely any on 4mg, but yes online HRT is pretty legit.
If you live in a country where you can get injections, and you can stand needles, you should get them in 10mg/1ml estradiol valerate, once a week.
Also consider Cypro over Spiro if you find the side effects not to be very enjoyable. Injections is cheaper than pills, but Cypro is a fair bit more expensive than Spiro.

>>5337310
>Cypro is a fair bit more expensive than Spiro.
50mg spiro costs like 25% more than 200mg spiro on QHi. Not that big of a price hike if you ask me. I'm not that previous anon but the drug seems riskier for a selfmedder with the liver toxicity and all

>>5337308
Do it, faggot
>>5337310
I'm happy with the E level at that, I'm at 1 year with B-cup tits and bitch hips, things are going OK. I might up the spiro to 400mg/day though to bring that T down a bit. The side effects are OK for me so far.

>>5337315
>but the drug seems riskier for a selfmedder with the liver toxicity and all
It's only if you don't eat at all with your meds in long term, and those that see liver issues are 50+ years old prostate cancer sufferers, taking higher than 300mg+ of Cypro to aggressively deal with it.

You'll most likely be getting rid of your balls before it can cause any ill effects from long term use, just don't be an idiot and drink hard stuff too often.
>>5337317
I think you want to aim for like 300-500pmol/L, but how much a girl needs vary a lot, if you're happy with the effects you've had so far, no need to change the dosage for that. If you're taking sublingually you get very inaccurate blood tests though, due to how it spikes.

>>5337315
I'm taking cypro and under weekly blood monitoring. Absolutely no effect on my liver function. Spiro, on the other hand, completely fucked up my kidneys, to the point I had several spells during which my dick was leaking blood.
As said above, don't go crazy on cypro dosage. 50 mg should be enough to floor your T and side-effects are minimal at that level. Well, other than effectively neutering you, but that's more one of the main sought effects rather than a side-effect.

Hey again /tlg/ I'm the guy who is unsure about whether to go on hormones from yesterday. I woke up and my first thought was "I want to be a woman" and I don't know what to do. Sorry if this is better suited to the trans help thread, I'll move to there if you lot want me to.

hey tlg, going to be in Indiana in less than 24 hours hopefully, really excited about this trip!

>>5337120
I'm 5'7"-5'8" and I hate my height...so close to average female height and yet so far off, unless I move to the netherlands, which might not actually be a bad idea because I like tall girls

>>5337133
>Being taller actually helps by camouflaging male proportions to a degree.

But it also makes you stand out because most girls aren't that tall...tallness is a male proportion too for the most part

>>5337194
yeah but i love cocks so i'm not in denial

>>5337603
I'm 5'7" too, and while almost all of my cis female friends are noticeably taller than me, I really look off when I'm with my family. Mostly because other than a cousin or two, I'm the tallest, guys included, and my kinswomen pretty much fit the "shortstack" stereotype, around 5' at most and cup sizes that make me cry just thinking about it. And I'm not wearing heels at any kind of family reunion, I'd look like an outsider.

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>mfw 50mg spiro and 2mg estradiol twice a day are enough to put me in cis ranges
I get the feeling my body hates itself as much as I hate it.

>>5337527
Nah, you're free to chill here. Sounds like you need to be talking to a pro about your gender issues, though.

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>>5337094
Now you can wear heals with platforms...

>>5337140
You'd like it around here. Many 6'ers. Farm country and good nutrition.

>>5337164
>main 'male proportion' is my height
shoulders and chest for me. At 5'10 I feel ok height wise.

>>5337194
no denial here. I like both.

>>5337264
If ya get to much of a difference it gets hard to kiss easily. On the other hand, there was this 6'7 gal I knew. I used to love to dance with her. We were just at that limit, not that I kissed her often. We never went out. She was looking for somebody tall. I wasn't in that range, but also I wasn't put off by her height. I tend to prefer just a bit taller, but I know friendship and love is more important.

>>5337961
Funny thing is... My idea of a "perfect girl" is more than a bit atavistic. Guess that comes out of centuries of endogamy. To me, a beautiful girl is one that's short and stocky, even a bit on the heavy side, with a round face and high, very broad cheekbones, dark straight hair and brown, hooded eyes, a well-defined nose and a jutting chin. So very far from current beauty canons...

>>5337297
I seamed to tolerate it well at first, but now it is getting worse. I think the reactions between it and my low thyroid are fucking things up.

>>5337297
>>5337310
>>5337315
Spiroburgerclapland... Looks like bicalutamide may be a better alternative than even Cypro, and it's cheaper, $45 for 60 50mg. My Spiro is $90 for 60 at 100mg/day.* The other thing is I could take them once a day. There just isn't any research on it's use as an AA for trans. It is an even more selective AA than Cypro.

Bicalutamide is also less likely to cause hepatic issues, and available in the US. Apparently there was a study to get Cypro to pass USDA, but it was withdrawn due to the hepatotoxicity issues. Only 4 cases of hepatotoxicity have been reported with bicalutamide. That gives it a rate massively lower than Flutamide which is much better than Cypro. Another thing is it doesn't seam to effect CYP3A4 action in humans. That means hepatic functions, which are critical for toxin removal, are not interfered with.

A big difference between it and Cypro is it doesn't shut down T production even at high doses, but it does bind to the T receptors much tighter than T does. It also up regulates E production. At 150mg/day they see significant feminization in males. Therapeutic doses for prostrate cancer are 50mg/day with GnRH analogue and 150mg/day without.

So many things to balance against each other. I need to do more research on it. It looks like it would mean I no longer have to use Finasteride.

* I have a drug plan so all are $5 each time it is refilled for my 90 day supplies I get.

>>5337527
*HUGS* Get a gender therapist, and start down the path. If you have questions, ask

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>>5338021
We all have our own genetic programming for what is perfect in a mate. My oddball, but I also have Irish and Welsh blood, is I absolutely fall head over heals for the small Irish waif look, but she has to have an almost atypically large bust for one. At least an A cup. Blond or redhead it doesn't matter. Otherwise somebody who looks like Shirley Manson is best.

>>5338449
Thing is, that genetic leaning pushes me towards looks that are uncommon in mixed European women, and increasingly so. Then again,my own looks are somewhat exotic round here and along with my lilting and tonal speaking voice get me questions about where I'm from. Those who ask are usually disappointed by the answer, I'm as French as it gets, just a mountain hick...

>>5338498
I'm basically a northern European mutt. Danish and Finnish(Sami) are both 25%, and the rest is a mix Irish, Welsh, Scots Irish, Scottish, Northern, Midlands, Western and Norman English. As far as I know we don't have any south east English.

>>5338535
I'm more than 99% Auvergnate with the paper trail to prove it... In all likelihood, calling myself a pure-blood Arvern wouldn't be that far from the truth.

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>>5338498
>>5338535
I should add that I get some feelings for typical Finns and Danes, but the strongest is for the taller Scottish women. Irish waif is second.

I'll have to admit, if the proportions work nicely, I can fall for any woman. In the past I've even lusted after Mediterranean, Indian, Oriental, African, and Native American types.

>>5338574
Well, other than girls from my area, faces that usually strike me most are North Italians, Serbs; Tatars and other central Asians, "Black Irish", Lapps and Plains Native Americans. East Asians, not so much. Northern, Middle Eastern and Mediterranean types, definitely not. Sub-Saharan Africans and South Asians are kind of hit or miss.

>>5337833
>>5338256
Thanks, I'll see what I can do. I'm so nervous due to stigma and worry my parents are disappointed in me because of the way I am....

>>5337821
same, I'm taller than most of my family, male or female...I don't know where i got the height from...kleinfelter's maybe? idk

>>5338256
I often wonder if bicalutamide is just not prescribed more because it supposedly has low impact on sexual function and I imagine for most people the sexual dysfunction from spiro and cypro is a welcome relief

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>>5338617
I don't know the ares of the African I've fallen for. All were tall. I think I prefer the northern Indian over southern. Others, who knows.

I don't know. I'm jaded. I've met and known so many 9-10/10 beauties that I'm looking for personality traits before it has even registered I'm looking at a bombshell of a woman. Give me an interesting gal with a nice personality and I'll be much happier.

>>5339041
If needed you can have your therapist describe what being transgender entails.

>>5339098
I don't know. It leaves sexual function intact by not being too active in the brain, and also the testicles are so high in T from the production it may not be able to penetrate and work there. I'd think its' low effect on sexual function would be a godsend to one in the sex trade industries. It may be that it is hard to figure out if it is fully nuking T use. It actually causes increased T production in the body, nearly doubles the levels present. At that point one would be converting T to estrogen in large mounts. On top of that the blocked feedback that regulated T is also up regulating E production. At this point I think it is near ideal after SRS/orchi. It even blocks the receptors that DHT activates.

>>5339386
It would be a godsend to people who desire that sexual function but not for genital dysphoric people. Personally, I'd love to get my hands on it but I can see why someone wouldn't.

>>5336717
only if they have a cute, feminine penis

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Hi all, home! went out with friend, had lunch, bought Frozen/Brave used bluray/dvd packs and had fun.
>>5335737
You should see a professional for a proper diagnosis if you're worried
>>5336717
I think qt girls are qt, obviously
>>5337120
>>5337603
I'm 5'7" and while grateful I'm not taller I wouldn't have minded being a little shorter. Though thats due to a desire for a taller gf. I -do- like reaching the top shelf.
>>5337133
>Get a buff gf who can lift you nontheless.
If only
>>5337194
If I wanted cock I'd go for it. Silly anon
>>5337527
I'd definitely suggest finding a gender therapist and having a long talk anon
>>5337603
Have a wonderful time in Indiana!
>>5338535
My main 'parts' are Sicilian and Russian, 25% Each on those.

Seems like a lot of transgrills don't want to date other transgrills, kinda strange.

>>5339604
I've dated another transgirl though it was fairly casual all things considered,some good and bad in our relationship but I realized very simply If we didn't successfully synch up when it came to sexual aspects, it wasn't gonna work out. While many things are about compromise in a relationship, issues in the bedroom while being trans are often ones that can not be compromised on.

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>>5339543
The price I quoted above is the Costco web one. (($45 for 60 50mg)) You just need a prescription here in the US or Europe. That is lower than my Spiro @ $245 for 180 100mg tablets. Using Costco's 90 tablets price it is $189.45 for 3 * 50mg/day for 90 days. That is the normal dose for using it alone for prostrate cancer. It alone without an estrogen antagonist will cause feminization. Add estrogen to that...

>>5339604
A lot of us are broken in some way and need somebody stable to help keep us stable. Also if she is non-op, then that can trigger us too.

if my name before transition was harrison, would it be a good idea to change to harriet? Or is harriet too old fashioned? I'm in my early 20's

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>>5337338
>>5337520
>You'll most likely be getting rid of your balls before it can cause any ill effects from long term use
Well I didn't plan on living all that long anyways but I doubt I'm going to cut off my junk unless they come up with vags grown from stemcells or something. I found the reason for the haptoxicity report in some paper:
>/CASE REPORTS/ ... Three male patients aged 78-83 years are presented, in whom severe hepatotoxic reactions emerged after cyproterone acetate (CPA) administration. Patients were treated with CPA at the doses of 200-300 mg/day--

I'm still sort of iffy about it, It's harder to find info on how exactly cypro differs from spiro in MtF HRT and if there's any interaction with spiro ie. should I take few weeks off when I swap from one to another?

I might as well order it next time just to see if it works better for me, 89cents for 50mg dose compared to 79cents or so of spiro of 200mg.

>>5339604
I'd date a qt I don't care what she's packing. Would be kind of a bummer if she got triggered by me being no-op for now.

>>5339651
Sounds pretty old fashioned. Don't see a lot of Helens or Frans around these days either. Not really sure that would be the best move. Plus changing your name is an opportunity to pick any name in the world that you like.

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>tfw so ugly my existence is a perpetual crisis
>tfw doped up pretty much 24/7 on whatever I can get

Eventually I'm going to run out of brain cells, video games, and anime, what the fuck do I do then ;_;

>>5340739
face the real world unprepared.

>>5340871
real life has only ever hurt me

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>>5340739
If you're that chivalry girl from last time you are very pretty. You even got like 100% positive feedback in passing thread and the folks there tear everyone to shreds. Also
>having access to mind altering substances
im ever more jelly of you

>>5341020
no that's not me I'm like -3000/10

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>>5341044
Hey that makes two of us then. I'm basically just zoning out, drawing and eating titty skittles until dark souls 3 comes out

>>5336590
vyvanse prescriptions cure everything

>>5341064
same desu

I just started drawing tho and I suck ass

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>>5341236
I've been drawing for about two years, it's a nice hobby.

I'm falling for a friend of mine.
I normally have zero attraction to women but fuck she's really pretty and nice and I like her a lot.
She doesn't even seem remotely disgusted by the idea of me being trans either.
What do

>>5341304
Flirt with her you lucky fool.

>>5341314
I'd normally have no problem with that, but she's seeing someone and I don't want to be a dick.
I was more talking about "How do I deal with the crippling inevitability that this wont work"

>>5341360
>she's seeing someone
Well that's quite relevant information to leave out. You can still flirt with her if nothing else to make yourself feel better.

Sometimes I wish I were a mongoloid. Most of the ones I've met seemed so happy with their lives...

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>>5341553
Same. Being freakishly intelligent is more of a pain in the ass than it's worth.
I can't even work most normal jobs because the monotony just makes me suicidal after a couple months.
Most day to day interactions make me feel like I'm dealing with children. I already try to make myself appear dumber than I am but it's not enough.
Being trans is just the cherry on top of all of this.
At least I'm able to draw strength from my redeveloped misanthropy.

>>5343378
>I can't even work most normal jobs because the monotony just makes me suicidal after a couple months.
>Most day to day interactions make me feel like I'm dealing with children.
To me it feels like I'm just too stupid to put my brain on monotone, no too smart

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>>5343378
iktf
>>5343492
Being to smart is like being trans. You just can't stop doing the mental calculations. They just happen no matter what. Yeah, you can choose what to think about, but as soon as you stop choosing, they run their own course.

>>5343518
I love introspection but doing it in work or commuting is torture. Oh well, I might as well enjoy being neet while I can.

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>>5343492
>>5343518
>>5343673
>>5341553
Some days I don't know what is worse, being MtF transsexual, bisexual, polyamorous, or exceedingly intelligent. All have caused me to be ostracized in one way or another.

>>5343815
>tfw polyamorous feels and I've never even been on a date with anyone

All of you self-proclaimed geniuses -- are you introverts?

I can understand your point of view on social interactions, but it just seems like you would not prefer to do it in the first place.

I'm extroverted and would consider myself pretty intelligent, but I've never really hated interacting with people despite how shallow and frustrating it can be sometimes. Though it is really nice when you find someone who you can connect with and end up smoking a blunt together in a deep conversation about existentialism.

>>5343918
>tfw asexual and I've been on a date with one person

>>5343918
iktf.

>>5343518
>you can choose what to think about
more often than not I can't prevent things from just popping up.

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>>5344386
>All of you self-proclaimed geniuses -- are you introverts?
Psh, obviously.

But y'know. I can interact with people if I have to, I'd just prefer to keep to myself most of the time rather than having lengthy discussions about newfangled iPhones or the most recent episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians or whatever people are wasting their time with these days.

Can't really talk to myself all the time though. That'd make me crazy, not smart.

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>>5344386
>All of you self-proclaimed geniuses -- are you introverts?
I wouldn't call myself a genius but having a lot of introspection, self-awareness and thirst for knowledge definitely gives you a wider lens on issues. I'm very much an introvert yes, though I love chatting with nice people with interesting ideas as well. Not that I'm an elitist, I like chatting with with people who dont engage in any 2deep4u stuff either as long as its fun.

>>5341553
hey, that is really insensitive to all finnish people

>>5345427
Us finns definitely aren't a happy bunch of mongols. We rank pretty high on depression, suicides and pain medication usage.

Okay so me and my friend are really high right now, but I think we just had a thought that could advance the field of philosophy.

I brought up the topic of ADD and ADHD and he basically said he doesn't think they exist, but instead it's just a difference in thought stemming from the environments children were raised in, and not differences in chemicals. Of course I'm typing all of this from no prior knowledge, but the fact I'm not kind of makes it amusing to me, you know? Like being ignorant about something that's so commonly avialable as a novelty to remember the past days of riding in a car and trying to remember what actor played in a certain movie, or playing punch buggy, or 20 questions, etc. Everyone knowing everything today is so boring, I just feel like I should avoid this place of thought to keep myself entertained for as long as I can, at least until I decide if I want to invest in a neuroscience career.

I feel like I may just be on some retard shit tho, help.

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>neglected by current gf
>no other girl will show any interest in me
>especially not a cis girl
>damned to be alone forever

Sometimes I miss being pre-stealth because I had more reasons to kill myself, and that gave me hope.

>>5346141
At least you had some good time with your GF right?

>>5344386
On, I don't hate spending time around others. Actually, that's the only thing that can provide me with a somewhat realistic assessment of what I am. Melancholia makes me see myself as a damned aberration that shouldn't have been born, so, well, I have to rely on people's opinions of me a lot if I want a half-decent opinion. Besides, I can get in tune with someone in no time, empathy running overtime, so I had a reputation as a good listener.
But yeah, I guess the emotional sponge side made me a lot more interested in random human interaction than the average high IQ type is. Not that I have a choice, people seem to be interested in me, no matter where I go. And it's not like me to turn down people, unless I'm in one of those phases when I burn all bridges in hope of finding total isolation and dying without remorse

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>>5344386
>All of you self-proclaimed geniuses -- are you introverts?
I'm effectively an introvert now, but I wonder if it is due to the abuse I got when young. I've had a couple episodes where I was feeling properly good, and I easily catted with people I didn't know.

BTW 7 on CFNSE exam, and 134 IQ when drunk on two bottles of wine and half a bottle of rum. I forgot to ask my friend what my sober score was. He was doing a study on the effects of alcohol on IQ.

I sometimes find interactions with lesser informed and brained people frustrating. I've kinda gotten used to describing things in more detail so others can understand so it isn't the bother it used to be. I'm a good listener, and solver of problems, so many have used me as their ear when sorting through issues, both emotional and technical.

I know enough smart people to have good conversations with. Thing is we all have our specialties, and rarely do they overlap much.

>>5344412
Same with me, but overall I can choose.

>>5344677
>whatever people are wasting their time with these days
Useless trivia,,, I don't see the point.

>>5346742
The thing that gives me an intellectual aura is that I have no specialty. And I couldn't develop one without becoming bored to death. People who know by rote the specs of every train ever built or in-deep sport statistics baffle me; that's so pointless and definitely not conversation matter unless you can add a thick layer of spicy anecdotes on top of it. I'm an information sponge, that information turns easily into practical knowledge by induction. The same extends to attitudes and idiosyncrasies and that makes me a bit of a social chameleon.
Give me a couple good manuals on a subject I've never touched, a few hours chatting with professionals and I can easily pass as an insider. Of course, anyone who digs a bit deeper will find I'm an imposter. Thing is, people rarely dig enough for that if they had a good, convincing first impression.

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>>5346883
I've gotten to the point where when I read up and learn some new area, my mind goes crazy pointing out all the similarities to other areas.

>>5348272
Pretty much always worked like that for me since I was a kid. New info just hooking to something that's already here. Not necessarily a logical connection. Pretty often, that's an emotional or synesthetic link. My brain also tends to fill in the blanks without conscious input. Lots of hunches and educated guesses in there, on the same level as facts. So... It's not uncommon to read an article about a breakthrough and think it's old news, when it is indeed newly proven. When you add that to the fact I can't help having a mental conversation with my projection of the person I'm chatting with, two or three nodes ahead of the actual conversation, and some people tend to think I'm a telepath or precog. Actually, it's just an overclocked brain working in empathy/intuition mode all the time. Still, I can understand people find it creepy when I finish their sentences or answer questions they haven't asked yet.

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95.5F was my wakeup temperature. Fuck! This is getting worse.

>>5348392
I differentiate between facts and suppositions based on them. I had two scientists as parents, so I got taught rigorous scientific thinking when very young.
>It's not uncommon to read an article about a breakthrough and think it's old news, when it is indeed newly proven.
My mind sees some breakthrough, and often builds the supporting chain of logic to properly fit it in.
>Still, I can understand people find it creepy when I finish their sentences or answer questions they haven't asked yet.
LOL I know. I learned to not finish people's sentences. I also won't say what I figure out on the fly as statements, but instead say them as leading questions. The fun thing is if you are with somebody who is really a true scientific questioning personality that isn't stuck up on reputation, doing the sentence completion, and answering of unanswered questions is better. It often leads to even more in depth discussion, or their spouse drags them away because everybody else at the party has no clue what you two are talking about.

[captcha, calling an eroded plain a mountain.]

>tfw you're on the fence about seeing a doctor
>tfw you just do nothing
>tfw the thought of all the things transitioning involves (name change, new wardrobe, fixing voice) is scary and a little off-putting
FUG

>>5348744
>>tfw the thought of all the things transitioning involves (name change, new wardrobe, fixing voice) is scary and a little off-putting
All of those are a slow process that happen in their own time and you get to do it at your own pace, so don't worry Anon.
Besides HRT itself is slow! So it's better to start as early as possible. If you don't like it, quit. But I am certain you will not regret it. Or else you wouldn't make that post. c:

So talk to your doctor, silly.

>>5348792
Ok, I'll go to a doctor somewhen, especially as my dysphoria comes in waves

http://www.npr.org/2015/06/26/417840320/new-research-finds-lonely-people-have-superior-social-skills
>So Knowles concludes from this that many volunteers who describe themselves as lonely actually have the social skills inside them. It's just that when they're asked to perform these social skills, they behave like these athletes and golfers who are choking on the big stage.

http://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/11/29/457255876/loneliness-may-warp-our-genes-and-our-immune-systems
>So the shock of social isolation could fuel inflammation in the body. And the immune system may affect a region of the brain processing fear and anxiety. "Inflammation can change people's experiences of the social world and what they're thinking," says Naomi Eisenberger, a neuroscientist at the University of California, Los Angeles, who was not involved with the study. That could make us more apprehensive about social interaction and lead to more isolation.
>If the cycle continues, that could explain chronic isolation and the subsequent depression and illnesses plaguing the lonely. "There are things we can do to get out of a depressed or lonely state, but they're not easy," Cole says. "Part of the reason is because these negative psychological states develop some kind of molecular momentum."

The whole series of articles is good.
http://www.npr.org/tags/155303661/loneliness

>>5348857
It did that for me too, but realize it's never gonna stop doing that, so do it now rather than later.
When I understood it's not gonna stop I just ordered my HRT online on the same time, you don't really have time to waste.

>>5348744
Same except im doing voice training and HRT on my own and my gov is drafting a law that would probably result in something similar to informed consent, instead of a year of gatekeeping and arbitrary hoops we got now.

>>5348744
>>5349826
Maryland made gender change easier. Just a doctor filling out and signing a form that says I've had appropriate treatment. Now I just have to get the free money together so I can get the process rolling. Name change is first, and most costly. Then gender on birth certificate. After that the rest are relatively inexpensive, but will take time.

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What have you girls been eating lately?

Dinner was spaghetti with a meat sauce that has had lots of diced up green peppers and mushrooms added. I cut up two large green bell peppers. I added them with only around 9 minutes to go before the noodles were done. That way they were just barely cooked fully, and still crunchy. Also the mushrooms were not over done and turned into erasers.

>go out to jam for a few hours with this cute trans lez bassist
>first time we went for drinks, we made out for 45 minutes in her bed, but she's got loads of dysphoria and asked to back off after
>fine, cool, let's still hang out and maybe work back up
>jam for hours, so much fun, go for drinks and burritos afterwards
>text her when i get home hoping there's a chance for some real intimacy with this beacon of perfection
>tfw she just wats to stay close friends and doesn't think there's a chance for anything more

how do you all keep putting yourselves out there? i've only been out for 6 months and i'm already giving up hope of ever being with a cute girl who i can really click with.

I forgot my backpack at a friends place...
My drugs were in there...
Am I supposed to feel a gross after a couple days?

SNAKE! I HATE CALLING PEOPLE!!! ESPECIALLY WEIRD LOOKING DUDES WITH BEER GUTS!

>>5351559
I eat pasta every day. Usually with white sauce, sometimes with canned sauces.

>>5351645
>tfw my type is the type that wont be found by putting myself out there
i'll just wait here until i die

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Evening all and Happy Hanukkah for those who celebrate. Sorry I've been absent but been doing a lot of PC work, fixing up my old one to give away as a gift to my son and setting my new one up for gaming.
>>5351645
>>5351822
Generally I try not to worry so much about it, though I know its horrible advice. I'm working hard on improving myself and hopeful I'll find someone special along the way. Otherwise.... Its certainly hard but the pay off is so desirable, perhaps its worth pushing yourself Anons?
>>5351762
That sounds horrible, and yes it makes sense you would feel gross. Your hormones are trying to 'fix' themselves.
>>5351559
Tonight was Chinese, tomorrow I'll likely make Latka's and Applesauce

>>5351559
I just ate a salad. It was pretty good.

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>>5352143
>I'm working hard on improving myself
I'm drawing every day, maybe i can get into an art school and meet someone there
>inb4 blue board

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>tfw everyone you ever show interest in immediately hates you and stops talking to you.
honlife 4 me

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>>5352501
You actually look pretty cute don't sell yourself short

>>5352501
Any idea why they bail? Hate is a strong word

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>>5352562
that's the angle speaking desu.

>>5352569
because I'm an aspie with no social experience and I get too invested in things too quickly

>>5352570
I got no social experience either, I get overly invested when I meet a new person yet I don't get any hate. Maybe it's because I dont put myself out there.

>>5352570
Nah you're still cute and actually seeing your eyes make it better. I'm a bit of a shut-in though I've got social experience because I have to work around people.

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Sleep sweetly tlg
>>5352501
>>5352570
It sounds like its time to learn from the past then, its hard but sometimes painful experiences are ways to grow. Hopefully the next relationship will work better. Perhaps finding someone else who gets invested quickly is ideal? I'm unsure whats best, only you can decide what you need to be happy Amy. But I do hope you find it
>>5352462
I hope you don't get banned for that but it is lovely art. I'm a bit envious but don't have the eye, or determination, to be good at art. I do though enjoy admiring it.

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>>5352592
>lovely art
ty~
>determination
This is all it takes desu, I also got tons of free time being neet and all which most people dont have. Painting from reference is completely different to doing personal works sadly so I can't do the same level of polish to everything I want, blah

>>5348714
Efficient bullshitting requires making no difference between your bullshit and facts. you essentially have to make whatever you're pushing your truth for fast talk to sound legit. Besides, it's easy to create facts. all you have to do is getting a few people to remember witnessing them. That's how every miracle ever happened. And all it takes are the most basic con tricks in the book.

>>5352617
What character is that?

Her knee looks fucked though.

anyone else from australia??
please im so alone

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>>5352692
Drossel Fireball Charming. Bought the figurine because I liked her design.

Her knee is fine, she's quite flexible!

>>5351559
You'd swear that I was going vegetarian if you looked at my diet right now. It's been soy, fruit, and salads for days.

I hate everything.

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>>5352708
Lemme come over there and gimme a roof above my head and I'll be happy to be an australian.

>>5353716
Same as this anon. I could use the warmth and sun too...

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>>5351762
Sounds like visit to your friend is in order.

I use one of those 7day pill reminders. That way my main supply is always at home.

>>5352462
Keep at it, it took mer awhile to get good at it. Of course I'm now totally out of practice.

>>5352570
Keep at it, you'll eventually get social experience.
this >>5352592

>>5352639
I likely could easily learn to do it, but I'm just not that way.

>>5353638
Mine is often quite monotonous. I've been trying to spice it up lately. Changing around my usual recipes.

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So i'm thinking of ordering from inhouse. I think i remember people saying to just tell them you'll fax them your prescription and even if you don't fax it they will still send your stuff. Does this still work?
Also, what kind of time frame am I looking at if I want it shipped to the US?

Thanks in advance

>>5354080
Yeah. That's not something everyone has in them, not even all girls, no matter the stereotype. That's probably not something good either. Got to admit running with the rumour mill girls back in high school left me with a bit of a manipulative bitch streak. But while I'm loyal and honest to a fault when it comes to deeds, using the word to manage a reality distortion field is just too convenient... I mean, having everyone around think I'm soon getting my ovaries removed because of a bad case of PCOS has helped me a lot in staying stealth... I didn't even had to actually lie about it, just said a few times I had some bottom surgery planned because of some endocrine disorder. Nothing precise. People just fill the blanks with the most plausible thing and rumours spread fast.

I'm tempted to visit my doctor but I worry it's pointless as I won't pass...

>>5354229
1. Yes.
2. 10-15 days.

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>>5354669
Thanks friend :)

>>5354246
I used deed, or at least the ones I let them see. I often had a side private life that others who knew me didn't know about. Anything I could get shamed for I ruthlessly hid from most people. For the world, they saw only what I let them. With good friends who I felt safe with, and in NYC & Europe, they saw the real me.

While I was living in MD, my parents made me go to a hs age teen group at church any Sunday evening I was in town. Yeah, it met after dinner on Sundays, prime homework time, not that I did any. I was actually often back from NYC by then, so I had to go. Anyways, one Friday night I was actually in town they had a dance, and even had a good DJ. So, I danced like a guy for a bit, then really got into it and danced like I did in the discos... Oops! Yeah, there were repercussions because of that. It was to immodest or something like that and I got sent home. After that all the guys looked weird at me, and the girls all wanted to get to know me. It did mean I was now invited to some parties by the other kids, but I often had to decline them because I was normally out of town on weekends. For the next dance, I was taken aside after it was announced and told I was not to dance like I did last time.

>tfw never going to look normal
>tfw my life has no value
>tfw I can do nothing about this

So nitrogen is what kids are using these days right?

>>5354902
>who knew
who didn't know

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What are these thigh highs called with the single toe like that? I tried googling different things but I can't find anything on it.

>>5354080
I got my drugs back.
My friend went back to Florida.


In other news, HIPS GOT HIS PLACE SEARCHED BY COPS!!!! HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

>>5355066
>Hips got his place searched by cops

Faggot

>>5355066
Why the search?

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Holly Woodlawn died yesterday. ;___;

She's Holly in this song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsVLIiI8Vfo

Hey again /tlg/ I'm that dude who was questioning ad stuff a few days ago.
I've made my mind up and I'm going to weather the storm that is my dysphoria and remain male....
For multiple reasons including
1: I don't think I'll pass well
2: A ton of changes to be made
3: I've already invested money in dumbbells, whey and other /fit/ stuff that would go to waste should I stop using them.
Even though being a guy makes me want to cry, I'd rather suffer than be a hon...

>>5355906
If you believe that's the right call then be it. I hope you'll be okay anon. Oh, and remember you can always try to become a more androgynous male without transitioning if masculinity is not your jam

>>5355906

(3) is a silly reason. "Oh no I want to be a girl but I have all this manly stuff, I guess I have no choice but stick with the gender dysphoria."

>>5355906
>>5356229
eh I pretty much kept all my stereotypical "manly" hobbies and interests.
it's just that I feel more comfortable exploring my other interests now too.

>>5356327
I didnt change my hobbies or interests at all, is this normal? I did gain an interest in personal health though but I'd guess that's pretty normal.

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>>5355906

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>>5355115
Because he's a rapist and pedophile.

I was visiting someone who just so happened to live with this fucking guy and he has like this makeshift enema kit sitting in the corner...
Like, wtf, at least find a not so obvious place to put it.

>MFW enema kit...
>MFW Durex lube just on the counter...
>MFW he's just sitting in his chair playing MGSV in cloths that I was told was rarely, if ever, washed...
>MFW I witnessed a skinny Indian who'd approached Chris-chan levels of bullshit and lived to tell about it...

>>5356541
Now I'm curious how your friend ended up living this guy

I'm looking into getting an aug in another few months since it's been a year and a half and I'm still only an A.

How big should I go? Underbust is 30.5 inches and waist 27.5. My preference is to go a tad on the larger side, but what do I know?

I need help with jeans.

The problem is that it's very difficult to get bootcut jeans that fit my upper leg AND my waist, and even then, I find the lycra ones tend to expand too much - I can buy a tad tight pair that winds up totally ill-fitting after a month. How many inches smaller should I be going after taking into account vanity sizing?

Also, since I have size 8.5-9 feet I have to wear bootcut most of the time to look decent, while I vastly prefer skinny jeans. True suffering. At least skirts/leggings work well as an alternative.

>>5357003
I'm just assuming he was trying to bait her and failed.

>>5352708
Yeah, I'm from aussie land
Where abouts are you?

>>5357091
Also, just measured my hips (widest portion).

30.5 (underbust) - 27.5 - 35.4ish. So I guess I should go for a 36~ish inch bust to be 'balanced'... meaning, a 32DD or something?

Regardless, sizing is weird as heck. Every chart I look at says completely different things about US/CA sizing, i.e. some say to use the +4 method, some say just use your underbust size and so forth. It's absolute insanity. I haven't had to worry about it so much since I'm an A-cup so camis and such are MUCH more comfortable (bras feel like they're trying to forcefully support something that doesn't need support).

Woke up in a really damp bed this morning. Amazing how much water a body can sweat in one night. Guess that's because of the dream I woke up from. Not an erotic dream per se, but about sex nonetheless. And just the kind of thing I might quote someday as fact if I don't pay attention. It was a conversation with Bulle Ogier about a whole film underground that ran parallel to the French new wave, that concerned itself with matters that couldn't pass censorship at all, including homosexuality and tantric stuff... Said most of the shorts were destroyed or lost but she still had a few. Was treated with a grainy 16mm sequence of her and Jeanne Moreau kissing. Really short, but there was something so raw and pure at the same time about it it seemed to last forever.
Pity none of that stuff ever existed and that all that will remain of it are a few hazy memories of something that never happened. I just wish my waking life was anywhere near as vivid as my dreams...

>>5357138
I've bought jeans to fit my hips, and the waist stretches to fit. I use them with a belt.

>>5357721
Nice blog post

>>5357824
Actually, I was going for a livejournal vibe, so nevermind...

>>5356038
Thank you anon. I'm also worried my parents would look down on me because of who I want to be. I know deep down it'd never happen, but its just a worry.
>>5356229
I know but I feel like I've gone ahead with being masculine so far, it'd be a waste to stop it

>>5358243
OK, so you're not trans, no biggy.

Good morning!

>>5358635
She's still transgender, just not doing the transition.

>>5357831
Also, my mind jukebox has been stuck on this song all day: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xa9cff_jeanne-moreau-india-song_shortfilms
Not the first time...

>>5359050
>She's still transgender, just not doing the transition.
I dont think that's how it works hun

>>5359110
Honestly, there's no reason to transition if your dysphoria is manageable, you can reliably pass as your assigned gender and you've already built a life on it. Transition removed one layer of weird and awkward from my social game and lets me somewhat start over a really fucked up life, just wish I didn't keep trying to be a dude, because I wasted so many years and I completely sucked at it.
"Non-ops" who stay that way because they love their dick aren't trans, I'll give you that.

>>5359110
Actually it is. Most transgenders don't need to transition. As said, if the condition isn't causing distress, then there is no need to transition. Some may still choose to transition because they figure they will be happier when transitioned.

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>>5359161
>just wish I didn't keep trying to be a dude, because I wasted so many years and I completely sucked at it.
all of the feels

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Hi there /tlg/ i need some advice.

I'm 25 and i have started my MtF transition (i'm still doing tests with the psychologist, but that's not the problem here). There's a girl (18yo) that helped me decide to do it, she was my best friend and all this shit, but suddenly some months ago she started to just don't care about me anymore.

For some months i had to do a lot to keep up our friendship, but she started to fail me again, and again and again...
So I started to feel depressed because of her.

Then, a month ago, we were going to meet for a party on halloween, but on the last moment she cancelled the plan (We already bought the costumes and it was going to be my 1st time dressing like a girl, so it was very important to me). But next day her boyfriend uploaded some photos of the party and i felt betrayed by her, so I deleted she on FB and stopped to talk to her. Since then we haven't talk, she didn't tried to apology and i started to go to another classroom (we are classmates too).

But now, a friend we have in common (more mine that her's) that knows everything wants us to meet and make peace this thursday and i don't know what to do or to think. I told my friend to tell her that if she's not going to apology, to don't come. But i still don't know what to do myself...

I had strong feelings for her because she helped me a lot and we were very good friends (not like love, since she always had that boyfriend, but she was very important to me), but now i only feel hate and anger when i think about her...

So now i don't know if i can forgive her even if she tries to apology, but it would be good to do it since i'm having problems on school because of her being my classmate.

What shall i do? Try to forgive her? and what if she hurts me again? i need some peace to go on with my transition, but also her help was gratetful. Or shall i just forget about her and just try to change all classes to avoid her? Doing that i was getting some peace, but can't do that forever.

>>5361084
Sorry if my english fails at some points.

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>>5361084
>>5361090
She sounds.... well less like she's trying to hurt you and more like a flake. I'm not sure I'd want to 'be her friend' again in your shoes, but it sounds like you need to tolerate her for the sake of your schooling. she's hurt you but also helped you so my advice would be....

Forgive and call it even, she's done both good and bad. That said don't consider her a friend. If mutual friends drag you out together be friendly, treat her like a friend of a friend. You don't need to consider her your bestie again to be friendly, but if she tries to get close to you I probably wouldn't go for it.
>>5359110
>>5359050
>>5358635
Different schools of thought actually from my experience. I refused to call myself trans until I started my transition myself, but thats because it personally felt wrong to me.
>>5357091
>>5357645
Generally I'd state to actually talk to your doctor before assuming, as your body matters a lot. You don't need to be precisely balanced as much as happy with the results.

>>5359161
>>5359278
>>5361284
As far as I know you are only trans if you are transitioning/transitioned. If you dont transition you just have untreated gender dysphoria

>>5361084
English is pretty good.
>but it would be good to do it since i'm having problems on school because of her being my classmate.
You already know what you need to do. It would be good to see her and see if things can be patched up some or even well. Also realize your paths may be forever diverging now. Also if you don't try, it will be eating a hole in your side and may mess up school.

Also something to remember is she might have had some feelings for your former self that she didn't express. While she was willing to help you, you ended up going in a direction that she couldn't handle. Yes, she knew you were heading in that direction, and even helped, but people don't always know how they will feel after a major change.

>>5357645
There are multiple bra sizing standards. Some manufacturers still use the +4 and +5 rules, others use the newer +0 under bust. I always double check what rule they go by.

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>>5361298
The 'transgender' umbrella was technically expanded to include SO many different things, I don't doubt people who suffer dysphoria fall under it. To be 'transsexual' not 'transgender' one needs to actively be transitioning as far as I know.

That said I really just like how transgender sounds over transsexual, more... 'friendly' I guess? It's why I err towards calling myself transgender when I don't just use trans.

>>5361310
> Some manufacturers still use the +4 and +5 rules, others use the newer +0 under bust. I always double check what rule they go by.

How do you know? Or do you just do research and jot it all down before going shopping?

>>5361298
Transgender is an umbrella term for all with alternate gender expression. Transsexuals are the ones transitioning.

>>5361429
I try to find out what they use by looking at their size charts.

Story time. I just finished writing this up for my book. I'm half tempted to have it be the first time readers find out I'm transgender, a few chapters in. It is merged from a few things that happened. Then green text translated for posting.

My first time dealing with a male model in the dressing room was interesting. At this studio they used the same dressing room as the girls because there was only one.
>I was helping final prep this one model before putting the dress on her
>noticed her chest got flush and her nipples were getting hard
>commented on it
>stylist's assistant commented that the client herself might like it, but it wouldn't work for the ad campaign.
>she blushed brighter
>makeup artist hands me some cotton balls and alcohol
>tell her this may be a bit cold
>I clean her nipples off.
>as I'm doing that the makeup artist matches a set of nude pasties to her skin.
>When I'm done she hands them to me
>I applied them
>makeup artist started covering over the blush on her cheeks and decolletage.
>I looked in the mirror to see if the pasties placement looked right.
>immediately saw there was hunk of a man standing just a few feet behind me
>hadn't noticed he'd arrived.
>a makeup artist was powering his skin to reduce the shine
>then he looked at me and smiled
>his front was to the mirror
>not a scrap of cloths on
>It was now my turn to turn a bright shade of pink
>some banter went back and forth between me and him with some others joining in now and then
>eventually he commented the stylist's assistant was the only one equipped right
>With a rather seductive feminine tone sliding down to a baritone I replied "How do you know what's between my legs?"
>"What!!!” exclaimed the model I'd just put pasties on. “You're a guy?"
>I looked at her and smiled.
>and said I was one of those a trannys they warn you about.
>she didn't even know what a tranny was.
(cont)

(cont)
She was still so straight laced and naive it was touching. She was also very rapidly rising to the top, been in the industry over a year, and still hadn't clued into how filled the industry was with queers. We fixed that over the rest of the day. The fact that she was there the next day early like usual for her was testament to her ability to soldier on, get the job done, and not let anything get in the way. She was the least princessy of any model I knew.

>tfw pompeii gladius from gf as present
>tfw can't stop fondling my sword
lmao

how the fuck am i supposed to masturbate?

hormones for a year
getting an erection takes work but is possible, i dont like putting my fingers in my butt and i dont have a dildo

>>5361609
heh :3 but nice

>>5361883
you could try a magic wand

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> Family of flat girls. No one in my immediate family wore a bra when they were around my weight.
> 'Mones for a year+.
> Don't even have that lower crease every single flat woman in aug before and after photos have.
> Apprehensive about the results if I go for it.

Am I screwed? I'm just nervous that I may have gotten stuck in some sort of misfortunate limbo state.

>>5362002
> Circumcised when I was a kid.
> Impossible to masturbate the way I want to because I don't have enough sensitivity left in the area.
> Future SRS results fucked since the most sensitive areas were chopped off.

Goddamn it's depressing.

>>5362002
it's so beautiful tho
wat do I should sleep but I enjoy playing with it so much

>>5362131
iktf, no choice but to live with it.
magic wand works though.

>>5362142
sleep with it? :3

>>5362235
did that last night already tho

>>5362116
Maybe not worry so much about our body, but think of how you will feel being a girl vs. staying a man.

>>5362131
Mine's cut, short, and getting smaller... It routinely turtles now, and sucks in. I often can't push it down and put a gaff over it anymore.

>>5361609
>>5362142
lol............
>>5362256
oh my...
can't get enough sward play in.
lol

Sooo... SRS doctors. I'm not quite sure where to start since this is sort of a one time deal, so it's really hard for people to objectively compare alternatives.

Assume cost isn't too much of an issue, and I want them to use the best material possible.

>>5362672
speaking from my own experience suporn
haven't heard a bad thing about him thus far
the result is pretty damn amazing and verrrry sensitive

>>5362681
B-but Thailand.

>>5362685
what about it ?
it was pretty nice there

>>5362681
Oh, one thing. If he's using scrotal skin, then for those with hairy... parts, do you get them electrolysized first (OUCH!)?

I mean I can't imagine anything worse than picking hairs out of your vajayjay

>>5362692
he removes them during surgery, no plucking or electro needed, while most US and EU surgeons will require the latter before you get surgery

>>5362700
W-were you circumcised? Otherwise it might not be the best option... Not sure.

God I hate my parents right now.

>>5362756
no
when it comes to circumcision you might lose an equal amount of sensitivity in the clit as the tip of the penis (like with every technique) and some vulva lubrication

you might want to contact them directly and ask tho
also regrowing foreskin is an option if you can wait a bit

>>5362774
> also regrowing foreskin is an option if you can wait a bit

Doesn't grow more nerves, just stretches skin. Thus you're actually worse off since they'll be using stretched skin as the material, so the nerves won't be as concentrated.

Still, it makes me really sad such a shitty decision that I never had a choice making will impact even this. Orgasming or even just pleasurable sex is probably going to be pretty difficult without it... Could anyone would had SRS and was cut tell me their experiences with it?

I never asked for this.

>>5362002
what is that and how much does it cost, and where do I put it?
>>5362131
aren't most people circumcised in the US?

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>>5363142
>Doesn't grow more nerves, just stretches skin. Thus you're actually worse off since they'll be using stretched skin as the material, so the nerves won't be as concentrated.
The alternative is less depth, or a skin graft. The skin graft will have no nerves.
>I never asked for this.
None of us did. *HUGS*

>>5362756
>>5362774
circumcision shouldn't make much difference for suporn's technique, also for sensitivity of the clitoris, except if it was done poorly or there is scarring.
I specifically asked this and that's pretty much what I got told.
about 40% of suporn's patients are circumcised apparently, so I wouldn't worry too much.

>>5363165
>>5363726
well for me it was for medical reasons, maybe it could have been solved differently but oh well.

>what is that and how much does it cost, and where do I put it?
just google it, preferably one of the original ones, and you put it on the sensetive bits of course :3

>>5361461
If I were to write a book about my life and culled out all the dull, empty time, there would barely be enough left for a leaflet. And all opportunities are far behind me. I feel completely worthless, a waste of a life. And it's way too late to change that.

>>5363142
>>5363726
>>5363766
Makes me amazed that circumcising babies is still legal somehow. I guess this is what we get when MRA's are stigmatized to be literally hitler by most people.

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>>5363819
'79 to '85 and this past year are the only times that is worth writing about, and there are two horrific incidents framing that first time period. The rest would drive people to suicide.

As I remember more and more about who I was, and what I did, I'm realizing I was really fucked up during that time period. I now remember negotiating expenses being covered, plus gifts above that with a few ladies and gentlemen. What I don't know yet is why I did it? Did I think that was all I was worth?

At least the EMDR has had some very positive effects on me. I've felt emotionally decent for these past couple weeks. I still need to solve my lack of energy issues.

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>>5363932
It was being attacked long before MRAs showed up on the scene.

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>>5363965
I know but there has been a lot of social development in the recent history on individual rights & protections for sexual minorities, ethnicities and even for women, yet it's pretty much a taboo to talk about mens rights.

The country I live in has a conscription military service (which I'm a part of due to being born a male), if you refuse the service you will get jailed. Our equality minister was asked a few years ago 'isn't this a gross inequality between men and women?' and she replied that 'women haven't shown interest in being forced in to doing the mandatory military service'. I can't imagine that an answer like that would fly if the genders were reversed.

>>5364013
circumcision of children without medical need has nothing to do with mens rights though but with fundamental human rights

I agree with the conscription though, that never made sense to me, it's just an outdated system that we still rely on here because of societal shortcomings.

>>5364084
>circumcision of children without medical need has nothing to do with mens rights though but with fundamental human rights
Well yeah but that's like saying womens rights have nothing to do with feminism because it's just a part of equal human rights. MRA's (at least claim to) advocate for outlawing the genital mutilation of male babies but I don't really see them getting any wind into their sails in the current political and social environment.

It's mostly an american problem as circumcision for non-medical reasons is not nearly as popular elsewhere in the western world, though legal protection of babies everywhere would still be kind of a nice thing to have.

>>5364099
I meant that as in applies to both women and men.
Though female genital mutilation is while probably less prevalent in the US undoubtly more damaging and is done for even worse reasons.

both is wrong though imho.

>>5364134
>I meant that as in applies to both women and men.
Well like I said it's a general human right, like basically everything else MRA's and feminists are advocating for. It just happens to be currently a mens issue in the west and more of a clusterfuck of human rights violations in rest of the world.

>>5363956
The only meaningful moments I can think of are the last months of 98 and the aftermath. And I'm not even sure most people could make sense of the whole thing and not be horrified by the implications.

>>5364150
technically yes, but since a vast majority of inequalities around the world hit women it's kind of understandable.

>>5364172
Perhaps globally but in the west the amount of problems faced by each gender is pretty much the same if not skewed against men, yet feminism is a-okay because must protect the womens and mra's just need to stop being regressive chauvinistic keks that cant get a woman.

>>5364230
This pretty much sums up my stance on male rights: http://www.ccs.neu.edu/home/shivers/rants/scum.html

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>>5364237
I assume that thing is made in jest or at least I hope so, but seeing how out of wack politically correct bigotry has gotten in the recent years I wouldn't be surprised if people who hold that kind of beliefs actually exist. Terrifying and disheartening

I just want to get off of mr.bones' wild ride of hatred and prejudice ;__;

>>5364237
[internal misandry abates]
So that's what that feels like.

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Seeing clearly mentally ill trans people makes me feel like I'm one of them. Like, I perceive them like they're just an exaggerated version of myself, and if their motives are mistaken from my perspective, then perhaps mine are from others. It's not the passing, the voice work, the stigma, the self-image, the lost time, or anything like that that gets to me, but rather, it's seeing other people doing it for the same reasons but being totally mistaken, but unable to see the flaws in their reasoning.

I'm sure that this is the right decision based on the information I have available, my past ranging into JK, etc, but at the same time I'm not certain whether or not I'm just a mess emotionally/sexually/intellectually. that is causing me to believe as much. Oh god, someone help me.

>>5365037
I think every sane trans person I've ever met has expressed the same fears.

>>5365037
Well, I am a complete mess. For reasons unrelated to gender. So, I can't claim that I'm sane. Actually, I'm certified as positively, absolutely insane. In a car jam. Yet, had I known transitioning would be so easy and had that much of a positive impact on the way people see me, I'd have done it years earlier. Then again, I'm as "trutrans" as it gets, other than for not liking males, which used to be enough to be denied treatment here... So, well, maybe you're doing it for the right reasons, maybe not. It shouldn't take long for you to know once you start. And if it makes you feel better, how could that be a bad thing, even if you're insane?

>>5364151
*hugs*

>>5364237
I've always chuckled at the SCUM manifesto. My understanding is it was written to shock and provoke discussion. At least that is what I got from some who knew the author. In the years after it's publication, it has taken on a life of it's own. Some see it as gospel. Those who do are much more deluded than the original author who clearly had psych problems of her own. Admittedly the discussions I was in about it happened around a decade later, and those views were held by people who also knew and still socialized with Andy. I guess I should also admit at that time I was friends with Andy and even lived in his home for a period of time. So, I'm not unbiased.

To set something else straight. Was belief in the SCUM the reason Andy was shot, not likely. It was over a script Andy lost track of that Solanas wrote. Note, this was back in a day when copying a document was much harder. Only a few copiers existed, and they were expensive to use and didn't make good copies. It likely would have cost a dime a page for it to be copied on one of the few copiers. So she handed him the original and only copy for him to read. Andy was quite absent minded, was involved in many projects, and misplaced it. She blew it out of proportion, claimed he stole it and was suppressing her, and shot him over it.

>>5365253
Honestly, I've found it's a pretty good shibboleth. The reactions or opinion people have about it are quite telling. And while the solutions she offers are extremely silly, parts of the societal diagnosis she gives are as lucid as it gets. Oh, and I love making people get mad just by saying it should be mandatory reading in elementary schools. That never gets old.

>>5365289
You know what is crazy, the tech exists such that we could produce all the creature comforts an upper middle class family enjoys for less than 10 hours work a day. The thing is there are so many parasite jobs, like advertising, that aren't needed.

>>5365338
Well, the only reason parasite and bullshit jobs are religiously inspired "ethics" that require people to work for a living (or to keep popping out children, in the case of women.)
There's little that's more patriarchal than religious crap.

I still want to lift weights and be feminine. Pre-op here, worried that I'll look too "toned" and muscly if I carry on.

>>5367471
Pre-HRT even.

>>5367471
>>5367477
pre hrt would be your only problem
since T changes the way muscles grow they look more masc than fem
but once you are on E for a bit lift ahead

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>>5367471
>>5367477
>>5367746
Yea, I'd suggest working primarily on cardio if you're pre hrt and for the first 6-12 months on hrt, erring on the side of 12 months or so. You'll want the time for your body to adjust and your muscles to grow the way you want and not in more masculine patterns.
>>5365037
>>5365096
There's nothing wrong with fears, you just have to realize you are your own person. If you took the time to try to see things clearly then the most you can do is hope you made the right decision.

>>5367746
>>5369647
Glad to hear this anons, so happy to know my dumbbells can still be used after hrt

>>5370222
You might want to get CPK added to your blood checks if you're on AAs, though. Little anabolism without T and muscles break down a lot easier. High CPK-MM means you're straining them too much, leading to rhabdomyolysis, which in turn can overload your kidneys, especially if you're on spiro.

I'm going to do my best to tell my mum that I want to visit the doctors about this tomorrow... Wish me luck, /tlg/

>>5371187
good luck :3

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Hey, been awhile since I've been on here. What's new w everybody? Who's still around from my posting days?

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>>5371331
Anonymous is still here

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>>5371331
I'm here but I dont post often. This thread prolly has half of my total posts even though I've been around for like a year and it was just some dumb arguing with a person who agreed with me.

>>5371331
I'm still here but that probably counts as a negative for you. Actually, scratch that "for you", it's a pretty objective assessment anyway.

>>5371209
Unable to do it :(

Good morning!!!

>>5374546
*hugs*

Reactivated my old the Spark/OkCupid account for people watching purposes, and it's not any better from the other side. My profile looks sillier than ever.

>>5374737
thespark still exists? i'm sorry i'm 31, haven't been paying attn, & i expected the only way it would still be up was if it were funded by heaven's gate in advance

>>5374787
Nah, it doesn't, all that's left of it is OkCupid which was at first mostly about user-made quizzes/tests and is now just a dating site.

>>5374546
iktf ;_;
I couldn't do it either, it basically ended in my dad just flatout asking me.

>about 2pm
>getting clothes ready before a bath
>all my boob control is dirty.
panic!!!
>tfw I need to buy more.

>>5375514
>>all my boob control is dirty

go without one ;)

>>5375514
>boob control

I'm not familiar with this term. Do you mean sports bras, or just bras in general? I like the mental image it evokes.

>>5375514
I guess that's the hick part of me, and the fact nobody's going to look there, but I wear the same everyday without washing. Helps me keep a constant silhouette too. Before anyone asks, that doesn't apply to the rest of my underwear. I'm not that disgusting.

>>5361461
male fetishist shit

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>>5378874

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Sup faggots. How do I train myself to be a good housewife with no prior experience at 18?

>>5378992
Ask what you're wife would like you to do... Being a "good housewife" really just means making your wife happy. Everyone is different.

>>5379008
I don't have a wife.

>>5379015
Then there really isn't a good way to "train"... I guess you could learn to cook or something. lots of girls like it if you do that for them.

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>tfw home safe. I got sleepy towards the end.
>>5376948
I wore a camisole...
knocked all but the points down.
>>5377519
Bras, tight tank tops, and sports bras.
>>5378992
>>5379015
Cook and clean are the starting necessities for a smooth household unless there is enough dosh for servants. Mending and sewing help. They help save dosh. Learn your sexual techniques, or at least read up on them.

LOL read Good Housekeeping. I don't know. Never had to do that for another.

>>5378992
Seriously, this isn't the 50s anymore. "Good housewife" reeks of backwards patriarchal shit.

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>>5378992
Learn to cook and keep wherever you are tidy. Your tasks vary a lot based on your partners needs and the place you live in. Read erotic novels to keep your mind occupied when you're alone

>>5379758
>implying some women dont want to be nurturing housewives
>shaming them for this is somehow okay
disempowerment feminists are fucking cancer

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>>5379854
I know, right? You'd think that a thread belonging to people who are trying to find both their personal identity and their place in the wider world would have a little more respect for somebody's lifestyle choices.

Oh, who the fuck am I kidding? I'm on 4chan.

Pic unrelated

>>5356327
Fun fact; you can take HRT without transitioning or losing boyish hobbies.

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different anon here
>>5359161
>Honestly, there's no reason to transition if your dysphoria is manageable, you can reliably pass as your assigned gender and you've already built a life on it.
I don't want to live with this for the rest of my life, even if I could probably BS my way through things for a while.
>"Non-ops" who stay that way because they love their dick aren't trans, I'll give you that.
Welp, guess I'm not

>>5380089
>I don't want to live with this for the rest of my life, even if I could probably BS my way through things for a while.
If you can go see a shrink, if you cant (prolly helpful even if you can), look up information about what transitioning will and will not do. Try and assess if it's worth it for you and introspect until you have reached some sort of conclusion. Try to get anti-androgens as soon as possible to prevent your body from becoming more masculine while you are assessing your options and trying to figure out if this is for you, that way you wont feel like you're in a huge hurry to make a decision one way or another.

>Welp, guess I'm not
Don't listen to anything that CFH says. I don't usually pay attention to trips but this one happens to spout a lot of uneducated, unhelpful and just flat out mean opinions.

>>5380123
>If you can go see a shrink
I already see a therapist, not sure how helpful he is though.
>look up information about what transitioning will and will not do
As far as I know
>3-4 month period of emotional/mental changes
>feminine features begin to develop
>cock will start to go away if i dont use it
>bodyhair will get lighter but not entirely go away
>skin will get softer
>i'll need to remove my balls eventually
>i may need additional surgery like FFS
>at risk for cancer and other crap I'm fine with

>Try to get anti-androgens as soon as possible to prevent your body from becoming more masculine while you are assessing your options and trying to figure out if this is for you, that way you wont feel like you're in a huge hurry to make a decision one way or another.
I already scheduled an appointment to try to get on HRT, I've spent years thinking and introspecting, trying mones is basically all that's left for me to do.
>Don't listen to anything that CFH says. I don't usually pay attention to trips but this one happens to spout a lot of uneducated, unhelpful and just flat out mean opinions.
Sorry, i'm new to this general.

>>5380152
>As far as I know
A lot of those are pretty much correct. Just try to make sure you got no misconceptions about what the feminine features will and wont be and what changes wont happen after a certain age (if that's relevant to you) and you should be fine.
>I already scheduled an appointment to try to get on HRT, I've spent years thinking and introspecting, trying mones is basically all that's left for me to do.
Good, just keep in mind that if you're still on the fence you can take just AA for several months with no ill-effects so if you're feeling iffy about it when you get your prescription you dont need to feel obliged to take the estrogen.

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Hey, it's been a while ! How are you doing ?

I've decided to get SRS in Thailand, if I can find the cash, and I need to choose between Dr.Chettawut and Suporn. Both cost around 14k€ without the plane tickets from what I've gathered. It seems like they both use the same technique, which is supposed to be the best available in the worl atm. What differences are there between the two ?
Any experience with one or the other ?
Lalalily I know you went to Suporn and said it was good, but did you consider Dr.Chettawut before that ? If so, what made you choose Supron ?

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>>5380152
>I already see a therapist, not sure how helpful he is though.
You may need to find a different one. The fit between a person and their shrink/therapist is individual, and not all shrinks/therapists work for all patients.
>trying mones is basically all that's left for me to do.
*hugs* good luck!
>>at risk for cancer and other crap I'm fine with
Only goes to similar levels to cis women if you don't used EE or Premarin type estrogens. Basically stay with the bio-identical hormones for both estrogen and progesterone.

>>5380123
CFH isn't as bad as you make her out to be. Like all of us she has her own daemons she is fighting.

When deciding what to do, it is best to listen to multiple voices, do some research, and choose what best fits for one's self.

>>5380603
Something I have to look into too.

>>5380170
>with no ill-effects
with relatively no ill-effects.

Going without testosterone and estrogen will cause some ill-effects for even short periods, but the amount of effect should be minimal. Most of them can be countered with the standard methods used for old people who are in a similar boat having low sex hormones due to age. That damage is of course balanced against the damage from further masculinization which may be much much worse for you.

>>5380734
I was about to post this exact same picture but I chose the other one. Magic ?
Let me know if you find something helpful.
It's not easy finding a proper comparsion as most people went to one surgeon and hate / love him depending of the results, but don't really know much about the other

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>>5380734
>CFH isn't as bad as you make her out to be.
I probably just remember the negative times, I don't have the greatest name memory.

>with relatively no ill-effects.
Ofc there can be some effects but back when I started I tried to research this shit but I couldn't find any actual harm unless the sex hormones don't come back after a month or two. That or you already prone to effects that hormonal deficiency can cause. The notable issues that come with sex hormone deficiency are long-term cumulative effects which should not be a concern in a healthy young person which I assumed the anon to be.

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>>5380772
I'm leaning towards McGinn in New Hope PA, but my research isn't that in-depth yet.

>>5380823
Fun thing on bone loss. You may actually loose more bone due to going onto estrogen than for a whole year of having no sex hormones. This is due to women having relatively less dense bones, and over time your bones will likely shift over to the female mineral and calcium storage patterns. Your bones are not 100% static. They do change, but over decades, not years. BTW, women typically store more minerals in their bones than men do. During pregnancy that reserve serves to help build the fetus.

>>5380734
>You may need to find a different one. The fit between a person and their shrink/therapist is individual, and not all shrinks/therapists work for all patients.
Well, I just wonder if he gives me enough input is all. Sometimes he will ask questions but he largely lets me talk and kinda come to my own conclusion. The one I had before him was a bit more active and did offer input on what he thought was going on, but that lead to me repressing things for a while. Id feel bad leaving him anyway, hes nice and cute.
>*hugs* good luck!
Thank you!
>Only goes to similar levels to cis women if you don't used EE or Premarin type estrogens. Basically stay with the bio-identical hormones for both estrogen and progesterone.
Ill keep that in mind!
>>5380170
I know I wont get shorter, bone structure will remain the same, and some other depressing things!
Im gonna take everything they give me and see how I feel on it. If nothing changes or I get worse I guess its time to off myself. Until then, I can hope!

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Just started HRT. Wish me luck.

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>>5382007
>nice and cute.
lol Yeah, iktf.

I've fallen in love with a couple former therapists. Both older bi gals. Thankfully I don't feel anything for my current one.

Just stopped by to see star wars chicks.
Like the pic

>>5382113
The shrink that's currently in charge of my case is 84. If I ever were to fall in love with her, just put me out of my misery...

>>5380734
No need to sugarcoat things about my opinions or call them "daemons", I'm as unabashedly misandric as it gets and I refuse to get lumped together with transvestites, drag queens, "shemales", "dickgirls" and sundry male fetishists under a bullshit "transgender umbrella" and all those aren't and never will be women as far as I'm concerned. As for "third gender" apostles and "non-binary" loons, they're not going to get any sympathy from me either. Gender is a deprecated notion that must be smashed, not extended ad nauseam. Yes, I guess that puts me pretty close to radfems. I'm fine with that.

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>>5384234
So, do you think of yourself as a woman? It sounds like you disagree with gender in general, so I'm curious.

From what I've heard, you transitioned pretty late for someone who wants to push a "I'm totally trutrans!" persona here. What gives you the right to claim who is and who isn't a woman, exactly?

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A part of me just wants to say "fuck it" and start dating qt boys instead
I don't really like dudes that much at all compared to chicks but it'd be so much easier
Why is finding chicks so much harder?

>>5384261
I get labeled female, no matter what I do or however I present. I'd rather not have to deal with such labels, since they're only a way for males to assert their superiority, but as long as gender doesn't go in the trash like race did, I'll have to. I wouldn't consider myself a woman right now, at least not until I get rid of the cancer between my legs, but I'm not exactly given a choice. Gender identity is a big fat pointless lie, and protecting it is misguided at best. Gender always was a label everyone else tacked on you. So, yes, I'm all for making those labels obsolete and see them gone. Thinking you'll ever get to label yourself and have people agree is just presumptuous.
As for pointing out my late transition, that's rather disingenuous given I was summarily barred from completing my first transition on account of being too young... So, I was pretty much resigned as I had given up on getting rid of the nasty bits until I realized that, yes, money can make all gates disappear. In any case, if something has a dick, is proud of it and enjoys using it, it has no business calling itself a woman.

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>>5384318
>non-op transgirls aren't women
My goodness, I'm really starting to like you.

If you don't mind, I'd like to pick your brain a bit more. I find you interesting to say the least... Do you use the women's restroom, seeing as you haven't gotten your surgery yet? I've only still used the men's room myself due to not having gotten my surgery, even though I get some unwanted touching and attention from the men in there. I just don't want anyone to think that I'm some creepy "rapist", fetishist, freak or something. Do you think I should?

Also, if I can never afford SRS... should I just kill myself?

>>5384318
>Jumps from claiming that gender is meaningless and has no basis in reality to dictating who can define themselves as what gender
sounds like you're looking for someone to blame for your shit life t b h

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>>5384314
I know that feel, guys are so much easier to approach too and share generally more interests with me. I just can't imagine being in an intimate relationship with one :s

>>5384318
>misandrist
>radfem
>gender is obsolete
Wait, what? Gender is obsolete yet you are openly and unashamedly sexist based on gender? Or is sexism okay when it's based on actual sex you're born with because that sounds even more wrong?

>>5384234
>Gender is a deprecated notion that must be smashed, not extended ad nauseam. Yes, I guess that puts me pretty close to radfems.
Radfems fucking LOVE gender segregation and perpetuating the us vs them attitude between men and women, so your perception is pretty off there if you really do think gender is obsolete.

>>5384448
>anti-male sexism
Next thing, you'll tell us there's such a thing as anti-white racism. Sounds to me like you're firmly thinking of yourself as male and fighting what you perceive as an attack against your dick-given right to oppress women here.

>>5384361
Pretty simple, I use the restroom I don't get shooed out from. I'll let you guess which is it. If you need a hint, it has no urinals.

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>tfw this weekend I just agreed to taking over...

>>5384166
My two gfs, fwbs, whatever, are 65 and 68. They were both lovers/whatever when I was young. I never negotiated with them, so I hesitate calling them clients, but they both gifted me lots and covered all expenses. . .

>>5384234
My use of daemons was more to describe the driving forces causing us to make the choices we do. My need to not feel like such a prostitute likely had influence on my willingness to even acknowledge my own memories that clearly were pointing towards my being in negotiated relationships where I was paid in expenses and gifts versus cash. Sure, "all expenses paid" I could acknowledge to myself because I didn't have the income needed for that level of society. In fact that isn't to uncommon. Often suitors will start taking up the expenses of their gfs. It is sort of a means to prove they can afford to have you as a partner type thing, but it also isn't uncommon for beautiful girls from lesser income levels to marry up into society. I've known of quite a few models who managed that. Can't quite make it to being a super with a life long career, then marry a prince, count, or sheik instead. For some of them, I wouldn't have been surprised if that was their sole goal when they became a model. For me, it was likely for emotional security that I entered a few negotiated relationships. These weren't typical escort type relationships. I was being a companion to the person from dinner through breakfast or even a few days at a time. The thing is they were negotiated and had clearly defined boundaries. As clients, I never had to open up my heart to them, but I got some of my own needs fulfilled.

>>5384492
>If you need a hint, it has no urinals.

You're probably to embarrassed to even look at the door, lmao

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>>5384318
>barred from completing my first transition on account of being too young...
iktf... I was forced not to think about it. my mind may have chosen how, but ultimately it was forced to by the outside forces destroying it.
>if something has a dick, is proud of it and enjoys using it, it has no business calling itself a woman.
I have to disagree here. The main core essence of my being is woman with only a bit of male. For the most part I don't mind my dick, and enjoy it's use in sex. I just don't enjoy thrusting, and often I find it frustrating that it isn't a pussy. In my dream life it is a vagina. I'd much rather have a pussy, and in reality want both.

>>5384361
>Also, if I can never afford SRS... should I just kill myself?
never.
Fulfillment in life can come despite one's genitals. I do acknowledge it is harder to achieve if the genitals don't line up.

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>>5384492
>Next thing, you'll tell us there's such a thing as anti-white racism.
Racism is discrimination based on race, sexism is discrimination based on sex/gender. Just because you think it's okay to be racist or sexist towards a certain race or sex/gender doesn't make it any less racist or sexist. What really baffles me is that you actually think what you're doing is somehow okay. I assume that's why Syndie said you got some 'demons' in your past that cloud your mind to the point you see your behavior as justifiable but no, you come out as openly misandrist and act as if that's not a sexist position to hold.

It is sexist, by fucking definition.
>"Misandry: dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against men"
>"Sexism or gender discrimination is prejudice or discrimination based on a person's sex or gender."

>Sounds to me like you're firmly thinking of yourself as male and fighting what you perceive as an attack against your dick-given right to oppress women here.
What a pathetic attempt to try and demonize and invalidate me by asserting I belong to a group you despise. What you're saying is literally equivalent to a white supremacist saying that anyone who wants black people to have equal rights is a subhuman nigger themselves.

Seriously, just take a step back, stop the mental gymnastics for a moment and think: 'If I changed the target of my prejudice around to any other race, gender, orientation or whatever, would this be ok?'
If the answer is no you might want to re-think your position or stop acting like what you're doing is acceptable.

But no, I'm a transbian, that's why I frequent this general. I do hate that I get associated with small minded, intellectually dishonest sexists like yourself.

>>5384740
Don't bother, I'm perfectly aware of all that. My last ex was a SJW and a TERF, and I'm just serving up her rethorics because I still find them hilarious. I don't need any rationale to despise cocks and those who have them, nothing will change my mind about that. And since there are quite a few new faces around and someone pointed out I'm a worthless, insufferable piece of shit, I felt I had to abide. Can't let such compliments go unnoticed.

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>>5384832
Well, if you're self aware about your irrational prejudice and such, I guess that makes you one step better than /pol/tards

I'm not particularly fond of cocks either, especially irl ones

>>5384642
Got to admit I'm feeling ambivalent about you. On one hand, a lot of what you post makes me cringe or is directly at odds with my moral compass. On the other hand, you're pretty fascinating as a whole. Now that Lily isn't here to make me smile, you're pretty much the only reason I keep up with this thread. Plain old curiosity.

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>When the dys hits right when you wake up

>>5385205
>every morning

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>>5385205
>>5385211
every fucking day when i touch my chin/cheek, look down at my body or glance at a reflective surface

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>>5384832
There are people on /lgbt/ who swear that I'm the biggest man-hater to come out of this thread. Those people apparently never spent any time around you.

>>5385878
To be honest, you'll find people here to tell you I hate everything. And they aren't that far off the mark. Except I suck at hating, really. Too involved. Contempt and dismissal are more my thing. Comes with being a thoroughly jaded melancholic.
Strangely, this is really attractive to a certain type of girls. To each their taste, I guess. I just wish I wouldn't have one or two of those awkwardly hitting on me every time I go out. My address book is full of mobile numbers I'll never call. And yes, I do mean a literal book. Leather bound. I also hand out good old fashioned business cards. Usually printed ones. I keep a few stamped on bronze in my wallet, when I want to make sure the person I give it to won't just rip it and throw it away.
I've seen more ostentatious, though. An acquaintance used cards made from thin rose quartz slices, engraved and 24k gilded. She was the kind who was born into money and nothing was eccentric enough for her. More tattoos than a vor and a pet python that she brought everywhere.

I kinda want to go on HRT but worry because of my big nose, triangular face etc just screaming that I'm a guy so I won't pass. That and I worry my wave of dysphoria will pass and I'll be "ok" with being a guy again...

>>5385592
>laying in bed
>stubble is back already
>try to avoid touching my face against anything so I can sleep
>get up and shave again

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>>5384889
I am a bit odd and fucked up. I just had them just pay expenses and give me gifts. Oh-well... It gave me what I needed most at the time. Might as well get to do some things one wouldn't normally ever get to do. After all, who becomes a courtesan for companionship and the need to feel protected and safe? Kinda shows how fucked up I was back then. ;__;

>>5385969
>used cards made from thin rose quartz slices, engraved and 24k gilded.
I've threatened to make a set of cards using mokume techniques. Layer up a bunch of thin layers of different types of metal, and fuse them together. Then press a pattern into them, and flatten the surface smooth with grinding. The pattern will then show in the surface of the metal. My plan was to control the pattern in some areas to print my name. Then engrave the rest of the information over an area with a more random pattern. Pic is of a piece of mokume sheet metal part way through production.

I used to draw unique designs on mine in pen and ink. I had my info printed along the edge or at one end of an otherwise blank white card, then I filled the rest of the space with some unique hand drawn art. Often in multiple colors.

>>5386149
Facial Feminization Surgery FFS is fairly good at undoing the effects of masculinization. So I wouldn't let fear of masculine facial structure stop you. It just makes the cost of transition more.

>>5386326
That's a relief, I'll heavily consider it then :)

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>>5386238
>comfily lazing off in bed after waking up
>turn head and feel the scrape against the pillow
>everything ruined

>>5386326
>So I wouldn't let fear of masculine facial structure stop you.
>tfw feminine face but masculine body
BFS w-when?

>>5386567
Sometimes I just dont give a fuck. I accept Im stuck as a guy right now. I accept I cant fucking control my hair. I just dont have the energy to keep fighting it.
Instead I do
>escapism through videogames
>feel depressed and become a vegetable
>sleep off the depression
>carry on feeling uncomfortable in the back of my head
Far more productive solutions to actually doing anything about my facial/bodyhair.

>>5335259
And?

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>>5386576
Are you me? I do all of those things and basically only those things in my empty neet life. Reading your post was uncanny in how accurate it is. I do eat titty pills at least but I'm still in a permanent closet boymode.

>>5386620
Im probably not you, Ive got a month or two until Im on skittles. Im a neet too though, so maybe we are dopplegangers or something. I hated when I had to go into work and I didnt have time to shave or anything.

>>5386636
I've never had a job but our current state is very similar as my pills dont seem to be doing a damn thing. I probably dont eat enough food or something.