moral thread

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>>35157798
My sandwich but with extra sauce and pickles

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Super fucking depressed lately, but it'll get better anons

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>>35157812
Back
I do feel better. That cranberry mustard bullshit is awesome.

We all feel like total fucking failures time to time. The key is to drown it out with bullshit like anime booze food or videos and try yourbest not to think at all.

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>>35157798
Started my vacation today. Going to the range tomorrow to waste some of this .223 I have laying around, then going to SC for airshit this weekend. Bought a ticket to ride on a littlebird and shoot people at the airshit game i'm going to.

Nice to be away from the prison for a week

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>>35157798
Anyone else wish they could go back, life is so boring

>>35158504
Sounds pretty kickass :^) like those vids of dudes hog hunting in texas from a littlebird

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>>35158504
Wait what?!

>>35158958
Was going to sa exactly this. Thats a thing in airshit?

>>35157798
I joined the Air Force reserves earlier this year. I got back a month ago and I've been working the same shitty job I was before. 12 Hour days, 11 which are driving and making deliveries. I'm slowly losing the physical edge I had when I was at BMT and Tech School. I can't work out after work because I have a newborn. They didn't put me on seasonal training when I got back, so I'm set so far back from when I got back I'm worried if I will ever recover.

I went for a 1 mile run today, after an 11 hour shift and I was dead. I could barely do it. I just want to go learn my job, get to my 5 level. Make SrA when I can and actually have a usable skill that I can make a career out of instead of a shitty job.

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>>35159038
Keep going for runs bro. I had a guy would work 8-8. Busted his ass then every fuckin day go to the gym. Ge said look. I will have like 4 hours of freetime at home after dinner and a shower. I can take 1 or 2 at the gym. And if that fucker wasnt tgere every day except sunday. That was his cheat day. Where he would gead like 3 big macs. Or a while large pixza or whatevwr

Been a little bit down lately, hitting 30 finally went to settle down. Every woman i meet is just not marriage material.

Then when I finally do find a girl at church everything clicks and she feels like the one I find out she being actively shunned for being a sinner and coming back to church to repent. noI'm supposed shun her as well. We promised we both talk to each other when she gets back in but lots can happen in 7months. It's only been 4 weeks and feels like 50 years have gone by.

I'm trying to fill the gap with rifle shooting, hiking, camping. Also hanging out every night with friends or family.

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>>35157798
the only reason i havent blown my brains out is spite

>>35159001
There's a certain company who owns a littlebird and brings it to events. Cost me $150 for the ticket. Heard it is totally worth the price for the experience

>>35157798
Started lifting, going to church, taking college seriously and saving up some money.

Things are looking up, at least until I hit a mood swing but I always get better

>>35157798
Morale
Sage sage sage sage

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>>35157798
Pretty shit.
Had a close friend for a while, he ended up breaking all contact after the 2016 election since I voted Trump.
He owes me $275 and I can't get in contact with him no matter how much I reach out. I still have the faggot on Steam just in case he comes online but I see him buying fucking games every so often and obviously not being too busy to talk about what I'm owed.

Also tired of living in my faggoty cuck state. I really want to move up North to New Hampshire but I'm a failure NEET. I don't have my high school diploma or GED even though I'm 22.

Things are going okay right now.

Took the MCAT, just waiting for the scores to come out over the next 2 weeks. Need to start getting serious about the application process, it's months-long but I have december to get all the paperwork in so i'm not feeling the crunch... yet.

Things are going okay with the gf now that we are back together after being separated for about 2 months. Unfortunately, this OTHER girl who I went on a few dates with over those 2 months is back from working over the summer, and me and girl no. 2 share a tight friend circle, so it's kind of awkward. I made this bed though. I try not to think about any emotional residue there. But deep down, I know it's still there, and I objectively know that it's a very bad idea.

Work is good, got a raise, weather has been awesome for this time of year, and I have an opportunity to maybe do some writing work, which would be a nice change of pace since I'd get to make my own hours and stuff, and I can do it quickly. I also have a lot more time to mess around on the piano (hobby), and I think I'll pick up an HKP2000sk by the years' end as a graduation present to myself.

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Still have to send in my PAL info after completing the test in November, 2015...

Also nervous about taking my g2 again.

And a little worried about money, but just made a savings account so that's good. Also bought a set of m69 hebe.

Mixed feelings. I just got a TACP contract and am leading the AFSOC candidates at the PAST in my region. This is where I want to be and what I want to do. But I am 24 yo and my gf from college who I love more than anything is pushing away from me. She says I don't trust her when I told her she could not join a BDSM club. Sucks we are already living 300 miles apart. I think my military career is going to end my relationship, which makes me sad because we have talked about marriage and even kids names. Life gives and she takes

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>>35157798
I don't even know. Honestly, I'm to angry to die. I'm fat, not obese, I hurt all the time due to football and wrestling injuries, the Army wouldn't take me because me hearing was fucked due to a firecracker going off next to my ear, I'm depressed and tired. But hey, I start a new job Friday.

I just want to find a decent reason to live other then to spite the people who died before me. A child shouldn't bury his Grandfather,both Uncles, and a Father all in 18 year span.

I'm in love with my best friend, and fuckin her was a mistake. Don't have close female friends. If you do don't fuck them. The friendship is strong as ever but I got feels and I'm pretty sure she don't. On the plus side I'm starting a new job and the pay is better. Keep your chin up, faggots.

Two more years left on my contract, just want it to be over with so I can claim my free college and move on. Glad my dad talked me out of a four year stint. I miss when I was motivated.

Well, I'm having a time of it.

I put my dog down Monday and I'm still looking for him when I come home from work, or the store n' shit. It was the right choice, but it hurts anon. Oh god it hurts.

last week, my brother in law tried to physically intimidate me into letting him live with me after being a shit head to my family and was upset that I drew on him and told him to leave. Suddenly, I'm the "bad guy" for being willing to ventilate a violent, punk ass bully...

At least my wife knows the truth. So, I've become a touch paranoid or maybe I finally woke up to how fast a situation can change and being willing to do violence is not a flaw but a virtue, but only so long as it is in the name of your family or friends. I carry everywhere now. In "inappropriate" situations I carry a pocket gun or ankle holstered snubbie, otherwise I'm near a rifle, shotgun, or fullsize handgun or all of them 24/7.

Yeesh. I've become one of them.

>>35160884

Hey bud,

You sound like me like 2 years ago and I only have very little advice to give, but I hope you'll at least listen to it for like 5 seconds.

Depression, fatigue, weight, and pain has a ton to do with diet. I know this sounds like shit, but in 4 weeks you'll feel better.

Eat only plants,
Don't drink alcohol.
Don't consume caffeine or chocolate.
Don't eat refined carbs
Quit tobacco.

A dude shouldn't have to bury his elders, but it beats burying your children; I can say with certainty. Also, they wouldn't want you suffer forever from their deaths and to pick your shit up and keep moving.

I was rejected from the military for having fucked feet. Yet, here I am running marathons and hiking cross country and shit. Fuck' em. live your freedom and their rejection is on them and not you.

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My dad died two years ago and its really set my hypochondria in to full force. Every lump and bump is terminal cancer heading for my brain. My wife is sick of hearing it. I panic that I'm not a good enough person for heaven and that God won't forgive me and I'll never see my dad again.

I am in college and worried about my future. I am lonely a lot and don't know exactly what to do with myself. The bright side of my week is that the sling I got for my sks should be in today waiting for me to get home.

>>35159245
Not to subtract from your post, but at least proofread

>>35157798
everyday I wake up disappointed that I didn't die in my sleep
The only thing keeping me going is the thought that one day it will get better so I keep working harder until that day comes. It probably won't

>>35160490
If he's doing that shit now, he was never a friend in the first place. I know how you feel about that GED, unmotivated and shit, but just count to three say fuck it, and do it.

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>>35163820
I always hear shit like
STOP DRINKING

is this actualy supposed to make you feel better or is this some hipster bullshit like gluten free

>>35166227
It really works.
I love me getting drunk, but it's a real dangerous path to walk.

You don't have to go pure dry unless you have a problem a lot of people take the stop drinking as go teetoller, when having a glass of wine with dinner or a beer with the game isn't a big deal, it's when you get drunk, a lot.

Still trying to get over my ex, someone sent me a pic of her with some dude and I didn't take it well. Just made sure I didn't do anything stupid. Is anyone a Leo or knows one in Ohio? I'd really like to be a Sheriff's Deputy in my county and was curious about the Southern Ohio Peace Officer Training Institute.

>>35166292
But going to bed drunk is how i get to sleep. If im sober i stare at the celing for 2 hours. When drunk. Just passout and wake up refreshed the next day

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>>35158011
I hope everything works out for you buddy

>>35166227
It's a chemical hack. The brain is plastic and shapes itself in certain ways, gets paths and receptors and stuff set up based on exposure to things. I won't profess to understand truly how it works beyond that, but I've been told that extended periods of Bad Times and other situations cause your brain to get locked into an abnormal chemistry, and that's depression. I had a bunch of Bad Times a while ago and even after the negative things vanished I just felt either sad or empty, instead of my usual happy and pleasantly nihilistic. Brain chemistry was just fucked. Avoid doing drugs for a while (including alcohol), get in physical activity and sun exposure, eat healthy, and your shit goes back to normal after a few months.

Probably gonna trigger some 'spergs, but fuggit. Doing pretty shitty rn, dad died and mom is a crackhead probably sucking dick for $. As a college student I have to pay for rent food car and all that other shit. As someone just entering flight school, I gotta get serious money from somewhere (drugs). Living in the ghetto ain't easy. Looking at the wrong person gets you shot. Turn your back on a nigger and you get robbed or stabbed. This is south Memphis, shit is a cesspool. If you don't have rich parents or get lucky enough to find somewhere paying over $8 you ain't making it alone.

I recently found out I'll never be able to become a military pilot (my lifelong dream). I commission this January, and a "rival" of mine in my NROTC unit whose guts I hate got a spot in flight school. I don't qualify for NFO either, so it looks like I'll be spending the next 4 years on a ship.

I have a good life and I know it's shitty to feel sorry for myself, but goddamit it sucks.

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>>35163856
The fact that you have those worries shows that you are a good person. I'm sorry to hear about your dad, and remember that marriage is a two way street. Take comfort in your wife, and let her take comfort in you. I believe you will see your dad again.

>>35168445
You considered Seabees? An old XO of mine was an NFO-turned-Seabee after a bad accident left him unable to fly. Granted, he was a bit of a motard, but from my conversations with him, he had a damn good time at it.

>>35168431
Private pilot here. Best friend is an airline pilot. Are you studying Avaition as your major in school to become a professional pilot? Unless you really want to fly civilian for a living, wait until you're done with school and have a good paying job to go to flight school.

>>35168488
Can't commission into it directly. Out of NROTC you have to join an "unrestricted warfare community" aside from very special circumstances, so I'm stuck with SWO for now. I might give it a look in a few years if I'm not itching to get out. That or Supply.

>>35168509
Supply is great I've heard, if you're not dead set on doing all the gung-ho stuff. Also a good supply officer is more or less a god in their own right to their unit.

>>35157798
Just learned my gramps is bed ridden and if don't get leave and get home asap I may never see him again. Which means I'm going to have to fight my supervisors for time off.
Now that I think about the same goes for my dog and great grandma as well.
Fug

>>35163856
Hey brother,
Do you remember the story in Luke about Christ meeting the repentant prostitute and the unrepentant Pharisee?
Those who have been forgiven little love little, and those who have been forgiven much love much.
Luke 7:36-50 if you are interested.

>>35168562
Go give them a phone call right now. Even the doggo. They'll love to hear your voice.

t. guy who has buried all his grandparents and a great doggo

>>35157798
Just ran 1 mile for the first time in 8 years. I smoke half a pack a day and am trying to quit. It was brutal so you could say im doing not the greatest but im trying. Im conflicted, i turned 26 last month and just finished a 2 year degree CNC/Tool&die but now im thinking i wanna join a military branch. What do /k/? im not smart enough to get a good score on the ASVAB and i think im too old but i can make machine parts and metal fab anything a heart desires.
i feel like if i dont serve in some capacity ill never become the person i wanna be ultimately.

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>>35168611
>>35157798
Now that I've gotten this out of the way, I haven't really been doing well lately lads. It's been two months since I broke up with an ex that was being unfaithful to me, and really the only contact I've had with any woman in the last two years was her asking how I was doing and her 'missing me' during the storm here in FL.
The most fulfilling experiences I've had in 3-4 months was taking highschoolers from our church out to the local river for kayaking. And honestly it's just getting harder. Our church is getting anything but bigger, and most of the girls are already dating or even married. I'm on Prozac, but my sadness just keeps getting worse. I keep experimenting with my sexuality just because I'm so frustrated and alone (I'm still a virgin, no I'm not gay) when really all I want is someone to talk to.
Send help, Father.

>>35158011
ive been there a few times. Just remember youre stronger than it. I would also like to add by saying maybe take a short walk when youre thinking about whatever gets you down. It really helped me out in my bad times. the small amount of exercise and mental stimulation of the world around you helps work through your problems and is good for endorphins.

>>35168752
I've been single 4 years now anon. my girlfriend of a year and half told me she was doing girls weekend then went to the Caribbean with some guy. I was going to ask her to marry me when she got back. Ive never trusted women since and ive never completely healed but the pain does go away, i promise. i promise anon you'll get better.

>>35168739
Quit smoking. Just don't buy cigs. Let the cravings hurt.

You can almost certainly pass the ASVAB for the Army. Get a POG job, maybe one related to the building trades. 26 isn't too old by any means, but you should start the process now.

>>35168821
Sorry to hear that anon. I was planning on going long term considering how long I'd known this girl. I was diagnosed with a chemical imbalance and the Prozac helps. My 'friends' tell me I just need to get laid to feel better but I know it's something far deeper.
I keep having suicidal ideations and my psychiatrist parents absolutely blow me off and say nothing is wrong with me. I even typed up a rough draft of my suicide note.
I do want to try three more things before I kill myself though: Bring someone to Jesus, go from 16% body fat to 8%, and shoot a 50 cal.

>>35168896
is it possible to get a job in my trade? i did some looking and it seems those scores are pretty high for some of the jobs.

>>35168919
anon plz dont kill yourself. Youre beter than that. You know it I know it and the world loves you. like i said previous post. it gets better. With 6 billion people on the planet you can let one girl get you down for 2 long. rise above it and start doing your own thing. March to your own war drums. not your parents or what the negative part of your thoughts tells you. You can do this i know you can even without a woman.

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Still got cancer. The nodules in my lungs are growing. Gonna start a new treatment that will probably mane my hair turn white so that's fun.

Need a new job but it's hard to find something that will let me take care of my son in the morning so my wife can work her dream job.

Gonna get a house next year, so that's actually fun. Told i could turn the garage into a gun workshop so that's awesome.

And finally i get to go shooting again this weekend and probably next weekend too.

All in all, I'm doing pretty well just wish the cancer didn't exist.

>>35168923
Possible. I wouldn't worry about it. 4 years of active duty pays the same GI Bill no matter what you do. Then you can learn to do whatever the fuck you want after in civilian life.

>>35168955
I'm sorry anon. It's not really her that's got me down. I'm just alone. I love my guy friends from church, but there's just something they can't provide me. I remember being totally in love in HS. And I haven't really felt that since. Since early 2015 I've had maybe one real date with one girl. Nothing compares to knowing you have a girl to text at night. It's just that simple.
>>35168975
Sorry to hear about the cancer friend. I'll pray for you if you'd like.

>Be noguns 3rd world
>can basically only have muh hunnin raifils and only after a roughly 2 year long vetting process
>just got back from holiday in america

Holy fuck its nice over there. I went into a gun store and witnessed some guy just buy a 44S&W on the spot. In and out.

Let me in you guys I'll be good.

>>35169119

Also to stay on thread
>tfw depressed because not American

>>35169041
thanks but no worries. Work on yourself, don't waste you're time on me

>>35169144
Wouldn't be a waste anon, I assure you.

>>35168975

>white hair

You can LARP as Geralt now, so that's kind of cool.

>>35169194
Yea friends keep telling me I'm gonna become some anime character. I'm just not sure i wanna look that old. But hey, it's better than losing my hair again, that sucked.

>>35169128
Be an American where it counts anon. On the inside.

>started process to be allowed to get pistols 2 months ago
>still have to pass YET ANOTHER class (which will basically be about not bringing guns in schools and shit)
>not until october plus a few weeks to receive the results and certs
REEEEEEEEEEE

>>35157798
I have chronic pain, and it's really bad right now. Trying to work on some finance stuff but it's hard to concentrate because the discomfort. Also my house got flooded so my future is very uncertain

>>35168919
Once you go 8% you will feel better.

>>35169516
What's the best way of going about it? I lost 30 or so pounds last year, going from 23% body fat to here, but I have barely lost any weight since December.

>>35169527
Regular exercise and eating should do it. You're getting to the point where fat is just going to turn into muscle so you might actually gain weight since outs more dense which is fine.

>>35159651
I feel you

I got a huge hug yesterday.
My god, I had no idea hugs were so great.

>>35169814
thanks senpai. praying.

Been thinking about ending things with my gf of 5 years. She's pressing for marriage and I just don't know if I'll ever be at the level with her. Nothing is really wrong with the relationship, in fact by all accounts she's been a fantastic girlfriend. But for some reason I'm just not that into her. I think. It could also be that I'm depressed and just not that into life rn. It's hard to tell. Do I end a functioning and safe relationship just because the grass might be greener? Or do I just be grateful I found someone who will love me immensely forever, if I let her.

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>>35168975
>>35169194
This desu, gotta look on the bright side and Gary is cool af

>>35166227
>I always hear shit like
>STOP DRINKING

Repressing pain is a path toward suffering. Pain is temporary and will resolve itself, unless you repress it with chemicals. In that case the pain will be waiting for you when you stop drinking/using and it will be much more prolonged because of your fragile (self induced) state of mind.

Basically, the MRI data (Diffusion Tensor Image data) shows that your 'survival instinct' becomes neurologically 'wired' to your pleasure center.
>You are tricking yourself into knowing that alcohol/chemicals==survival.
You need to let the pain pass naturally, and not form those connections, so that survival (cerebelllum) works on it's own. And that your pleasure center remains linked to your forebrain (frontal lobes/personality)

Once the amygdala starts making decisions without consulting your frontal lobes, you're fucked and will end up repressed and a lifelong shitbag with a pile of repressed anger and regret.

It's at the root of addiction AND ptsd to let your amygdala dictate your behavior without the benefit of your personality and convictions filter out the retardedness.

t. neuro imaging consultant

I haven't had sex in a year and i have no female interaction

But at least i have my guns

>>35169908
Oh god this.
>get drunk at Halloween party
>flirting with girl
>turns out she has a boyfriend so I back off, keep it playful anyway
>we both leave at the same time
>about to split our separate ways in the apartment parking lot
>"I had fun tonight, Anon. I'm glad I met you."
>y-you too
>Kamikaze and scarecrow hug good and tight before walking away into the night
Feels good man. If any of you fuckers was at the party and recognizes the story I'll run a plane into your house.

>>35169985
The grass is never greener unless you water it. Put time and effort into your good, functioning relationship and things will get better.

>>35170053

And I thought the alcohol abuse was bad for neural correlates. You've disconnected some deep survival instincts.

Are you Japanese or some shit?

>>35160490
He's most likely using your vote as a reason to not pay you back. Just forget about him and the money.

>>35170054
Whoa man, hugging a girl with a boyfriend, good thing you've got firepower.
But yea, they're so warn and soft, spongy almost. I think that one day I'll get married and get hugs every single day.

>>35169985
Trust me /k/omrade. No matter which chick you end up with, you two will grow stale on each other. If you have a solid friendship as a base, consider yourself lucky, but don't get married in your 20's. She will want to be married in her 20's. If it doesn't line up it'll fail. If it does line up, it'll still likely fail, and you'll lose.
Just be a man and tell her that marriage isn't an option right now. But either way, you won't be able to do anything to keep her from doing what she wants. So don't let her be the focal point of your life and don't let her force your hand

>>35170184
You know anon, if you get cancer you can get hugs from literally anybody.

>>35170303
don't do this
For the love of God, how many young women want to get married in their 20s? Is she a virgin? She sounds like a serious catch. You don't even need to have children right away.

>>35161766
shit sucks dude. i know the feeling. fell in love with my best friend too, she didn't feel the same way. she was literally my happiness.

>>35170313
Wait,you mean ANYONE will just open their arms for me if I've got cancer? I know it's not worth it as I would only be around to get a short period of high frequency hugs (plus I'm not into that sort of thing). But what if I got like a mild cancer? Would that work?

>>35170303
>>35170329
Thing is idk if I've ever been in love with her. I have love FOR her sure. But like, in the same way I love my bros. She's always been the one pursuing me. When we started dating it was because she asked and I was bored at the time. Just neither of us ever did anything horrible to eachother since then so we never broke up. Yes to the virgin question. Also she's scared of guns, is fine with me having them, but she won't touch em. Minor issue but w/e

>>35170482
Usually, just don't be specific.

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>>35170482

You know what would work? LYING ABOUT GETTING CANCER HOW ABOUT THAT!

Things are pretty good. My trailer wasnt destroye by the hurricane, my new medications are stabilizing my rage and dissociative disorders, the va is going to pay for me to go to tech school without tapping my gi bill. I have a beautiful fiancee who gives me free tattoos and im almost one year clean and sober

>>35170521
Now that I think about it, it is a bit dishonest. I mean, I really like hugs like any red blooded man don't get me wrong. I just don't want to get my hugs though pity. That's not a very good thing to build a relationship on.

>>35168361
This right here is very true, I quit drinking and only at plants/vegan for a few months and I felt great and my mind was even better.

After that sick months I went back to eating meat but every 3 days or something I'll have steak or tacos. Still normal and happy.

Eating right really fixed me up pretty good.

>>35170621

You could lie about anything to get pity hugs man, "your dog died" "you were beaten as a child and have social anxiety" "your immediate family disowned you" etc the possibilities are endless.

>>35170621
you're correct, but who says relationship? But really, the pity stuff sucks almost the worst of everything you go through with cancer. I get it, I've got cancer and that's sad but i don't need your pity, i need you to be my friend and hang out like we did before diagnosis, I'll feel bad enough about my cancer without you also doing it

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>tfw wageslave with job I dislike because shitty scheduling and lack of co-workers to allow for better scheduling
>tfw saving up bux for school and such
>tfw hoping it's the right path
At least my LTC is getting processed so I'm lookin forward to that & I'm trying to put together Vietnam gear for gearqueer/ Halloween costume/ fun (the Halloween bit I worry someone is gonna hate my guts even though I just enjoy the aesthetic of vietnam soldier stuff and could use it for SHTF)

>>35170643
Don't tempt me! You devil!
>>35170670
Yea, My grandpa didn't tell anyone about his. Wanted to kick ass to the end of his days. But he was a bit insane so self preservation wasn't a priority for him.

>>35170497
>virgin
MARRY HER AND TAKE HER TO CHURCH

Feeling kinda shitty lately. Found out my best friend for 2-3 years has been telling anyone and everyone he knows that I was diagnosed with autism. That I'm autistic basically. The thing is I've seen a psychologist before and I'm literally not autistic, I don't meet the criteria. I had a mild anxiety disorder for awhile, in part due to childhood obesity. I lost the weight however. I'm pretty fucking pissed off at him and hes not my friend anymore. I've done a lot of shit for him over the years and I never expected him to betray me like that.

>>35171549
I was never diagnosed with autism of any kind.