This guy enters your room, what do?

An hero immediately

>>34970284
Ask him politely yet firmly to knock first

>>34970284
Walk up the stairs

Aim for the feet!

keep jacking off.

>>34970284
Call Hoxton, Chains, and Jacket and say AAAAAA I NEED A MEDIC BAG AAAA I'M DYING SOMEBODY DROP A MEDIC BAG

>>34970284
go up the stairs

Every shitty Ubisoft game has one of these kevlar guys as the archaic "heavy" type.
Can't really compare a game to real life but if you attack from the side were they can see you and dump a magazine on them they die eventually. But irl they are probably like tanks and have men defending them.

>>34970284
tip him over and watch him try to stand up again

>>34970284
Aim for the orange parts

>>34970284
Walk calmly behind him then ask for a piggy back ride.

>>34970284
circle around and tip over

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>>34970284
according to Dirty Bomb, charging them with a cricket bat seems to work just fine every time.

>>34970284
Wave and say hi.

I'm either dead or going to get to play cards with him.

First I would freeze all the bombs he puts out. Then I would attempt to get a headshot in, yet he may run into any claymores I've put down.

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get several people and carry him away

Turn on a game and offer him a seat

Point to the vending machine and ask him to shoot it open

>>34970284
Die. Like what do you sersiously do? Sitting right here at your pc and he comes crashing through the door? Die sitting and chilling or die trying to rush into melee range? Tough choice. Basically grab your sidearm and shoot yourself.

Jump up and rush him with my knife, hopefully I can take advantage of the second or two it takes him to heft his m249, rip off his mask and cut his jugular.

>>34970284
Open up a queer gear thread and post a pic of him, then when everyone tells me how shit all of his stuff i'd try to shoot him and watch as little lead disks drop to the floor, and with my dying breath say 'fuck you qg faggots'

>>34970349
ayyyyyy

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>>34970284
Ask him why he's wearing my dogs bed around his neck.

>>34970284
spraypaint his helmet and watch him stumbling around.

"Sir the airshit field is down the hall and to the left"

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>>34970284
Mag dump either of these two areas.

The leg isn't fully armored, and even it is it, it will snap after a round or two.

Aiming at the receiver, and box mag on his weapon, will cause a malfunction.

At that point, I'd walk up to him as he turtles helplessly, pull his helmet off, jam one of his nades down the neck hole, and pull the pin.

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Shoot his gun's feed tray, knock him down, casually strip off his armor, coat him with cosmoline, pack him into a wooden crate, leave him there for several days, take him out and scour the cosmoline off, then lock him in my gun safe.

>>34970722
What if he says "fuck you"?

>>34970349
BULLLLLDOOOOZZZZZEEEERRRR

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>>34970730

Can I shake your hand? There will be a movie about your life someday.

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>>34970730
>this autist actually answered the question

of course you go for the legs,anyone who ever heard about the hollywood shootout knows that

>>34970284
FROM VICIOUS GIANT INSECTS WHO HAVE ONCE AGAIN COME BACK!

Walk up some stairs. Poor dudes carrying so much shit he'll die of exhaustion soon enough

>>34970284
I throw a blanket over him..

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>>34970349

>ITSAMUTHAFUGINBULLDOZER

*unsheaths drill*

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>>34970284

BLAST HIM WITH PISS.

Walk behind him.

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>>34970973
wrestling match

>>34970284
>hear him coming down the hallway
>timetooperate.jpg
>throw on solar eclipse glasses and range earmuffs
>throw dragon dildo at him
>in his confusion doesn't notice the dildo is missing a pin
>flash grenade
>meanwhile I've already jumped out the window
>run around to the front of the house, his heavy ass won't be able to get out of the house fast enough
>speed away in my car to innawoods
I win

>>34970284
desu im not sure
full body tackle up might be an option
cons are that he may be fast enough and spray shot you.
even if i manged to tackle him and knock him down, he could have an accessible sidearm. in this case my only other option is to pull the nade pin and run for my life

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>>34970284
Throw this at him.

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>>34970327

>Just got out of shower
>Towel wrapped around me
>Drop towel, start to slip on bra and panties
>Tactical Koolaid Man bursts into my room
>"IYAAAAAAA!!"
>"THIS IS A LADY'S ROOM!!!"
>Slap him so hard all his armor falls off as his body flies and hits the wall
>His eyes are swirled and a drip trail of blood runs from his nose
>"B-BAKA!!"

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>>34971921
This

>>34970284
Tell him what bothers me.

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>>34970284
>SHIT WE'VE GOT A DOZER

Sustained blasts to the head area with 12 gauge. Won't penetrate, but will make him operationally incapable by shitting up his window, and giving him a headache/concussion.
I can move faster than him in all that gear. Probably slice open the femoral artery while he's down, stab gun hand.

My only gun is an old rolling block in 28 gauge so I would probably fire one or two shots and proceed to die honorably

>>34970284
>Click here
Watch a handfull of 00 buck followed by a slug penetrate the fuck out of that weeaboo fake kevlar and hollow out the chest cavity of that airsoft retard.

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>>34970284
hold B to charge my spin attack

>>34970284
I push him over.

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>>34970284
BOMB SUIT WRESTLING

>>34970284
Ask him if he wants to kill commies with me

>>34970284
sage. god this is old, fuck off if you have nothing original

>>34970284
Push him over, and roll him out into the sun to bake to death.

>>34974450
>no plates
>no inserts
>no hds cert
http://www.larping.org/

>tfw skulldozers keep slapping my shit in when running akimbo dodge build
what do, anons?

>>34974899
>go to larping.org
>presently surprised

thanks!

>>34974899
that was one of the first pictures I took on the first day I got it you dumb faggot, i have since installed some

>>34974994
>not exclusively running armor builds
its like you're trying to get shot up

>>34971521
WE'LL UNLEASH ALL OUR FORCES, WE WON'T CUT THEM ANY SLACK!

>>34970284
In all honesty if he's alone he will have trouble aiming and working the trigger, I'd roll right and charge him at from there, he won't be able to turn fast enough to respond or aim well with one hand.

Tell him he's being reclassed from eod and going to the quartermaster side of fort lee to learn how to cook.

>>34974994
>dodge build
Get out

>>34970284

Got a warrant? If not leave. If so read it to me.

>>34970284
Ask for anonymous buttsecks

Tell him hes NOT the man that I ordered from the ad...I said I had a fantasy for authentic Robocop roleplay

>>34976196
>being this mad of being called a larper
>I put plates in!
pics or it didn't happen
Do you even have the helmet and wrist panel?

>>34971827
Tell him that he got the wrong door and that the leather club is two blocks down

>>34970284
Remember the basics of CQC

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>People are shitposting about Judenday on /k/.

I don't know why this mildly upsets me but it does.

Say hi, ask why he's in my house.

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>>34970284
Concussion grenades will work just fine.

Source: I'm a combat engineer (reservist).

>>34970284
NO ZAKU BOY

NO ZAKU

>>34977647
>YOU CAN'T HAVE SOMETHING COOL BECAUSE I SAY SO
ya fuck off
the helmet and wrist panel didn't come with it

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>>34970284

>>34970334
You sir, are a fucking comedy genius.

>he totally looks like a dalek

>>34970284

Go outside.

Hit him with a Challenger

>Maneuver behind him, and firmly kick him behind the knee cap causing him to fall to his knee.
>Deliver another kick to the other leg and break the knee cap.
>While behind him whisper in his ear, "I'm gonna make you squeal like a piggy."

>>34970284
shoot his gun

>>34970730
>nades
you know how i know youre a fat nerd virgin?

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>>34970334

tell him i'm making nice pasta and he take off helmet to receive pasta and i kill

>>34970284
Tip like cow.

>>34970781
>>34970730

Yeah but hes 240 pounds of muscle and is not shoving his saw barrel up your ass for trying to mess with him. Next move?

>>34970284
Shoot his foot.

Cover whatever ventilation he has and turn up my houses heating

Throw myself out my window, I am a no-guns, I turned 18 two months ago.

>>34982052
t. Italian

>>34970284
>dozer kicks open my door
>is instantly repelled by the odor of piss bottles and kitty litter that has turned into muddy clay
>his eyes begin to water from the sheer wave of ammonia, but he can't wipe his eyes
>His vision wavering he starts the offense
>begins to march forward while triggering his weapon
>saw belt gets caught on a 2 month old fly trap jamming his gun
>he trips over a pile of beer cans, half of them full of piss
>landing in a pile of garbage his visor is completely coated in tendie dipping sauce
>blind, gagging, and coated in shit he tries to get up but all of a sudden it feels like another dude in his load out is stomping on him
>oh no, his fate is far worse
>my rascal tipped over and all 700lbs of mommies beautiful baby boy has fallen on the dozer
>the smell is intensified to the nth degree, dozers bones begin to give way
>He screams for his mama, knowing the end is near
>his life is ended when I finally have a heart attack from all the excitement and my body oozes fecal matter from every poor
>war is hell

>>34970284
>THAT'S MY PURSE!
>I DON'T KNOW YOU!

>>34981475
I wonder how well a mini one that shot .22 would work.