Planetary defense

>>34712784
NUKE IT
FROM
O R B I T
R
B
I
T

WASR10

>>34712784
45 acp

Willam Dafoe potentially?

>>34712825
you're gonna need to pull out an arnold schwarzeneger for this one man, it's potentially the last action movie ever made you either go all in or you dont go at all

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Some say the end is near.
Some say we'll see Armageddon soon.
Certainly home we will.
Certainly could use a vacation from this silly shit. Stupid shit.

>>34712784
Put a satellite in orbit around it that slowly tugs it in one direction until it corrects its trajectory enough to miss the earth.

Nuking doesn't work.

t. spaceman

>>34712784
Pop Mars in the leg and laugh as Earth orbits out of the way.

>>34712784
Get the population of earth to one side of the planet and have everyone fire .45 straight into the air to push earth away from the path of the roid

>>34713023
Don't put it into orbit around the asteroid.
Shift its trajectory over the course of several months with an array of high ISP thrusters. The trick would be to detect it early enough to make interception/redirection feasible.

t. some guy

>>34713792
This.

Changing it's course would be easy. Detecting it far enough out and intercepting it with the thrusters would be the hard part.

>>34713857
>Changing it's course would be easy

>launching a rocket with a mobile thruster that has to navigate through the debris field of spinning ball of ice rock, land, solidly attach itself to the ice rock, and then ignite it's thruster is "easy"

Stick to movies, kid

>>34713792
Either, or both in conjunction, would work.

>>34713953
>navigate through a debris field
Fuck your stupid memes. This is literally out of a movie or tv show. Asteroids do not congregate in dense herds. They also do not randomly throw out chunks of themselves. Even comets don't really, the cloud they leave is highly diffuse.

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STONEHEDGE

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>>34712784

>>34712784

>news anchors tell people around the world the grim news of the day
>an asteroid capable of destroying human civilization is nearing earth, and nothing can effectively halt it
>some resort to blind, fear-fueled panic, others to fervent prayer
>the hour of impact comes
>the asteroid is being watched by every telescope in existence
>all hope is gone as people cower in bunkers worldwide, watching it descend to the earth on the news
>suddenly, something else comes into view, and it looks brown, long... like a rifle...
>a select group of people immediately recognize it as what it is, in complete disbelief
>they watch as it skewers the rock with the tip of its bayonet and fires a slug at the asteroid that looked bigger than the asteroid itself, reducing the rock to space dust
>a giant space Mosin-Nagant has destroyed the asteroid
>it then cycles its own bolt, ejecting a colossal casing that runs into another smaller asteroid that nobody had noticed, pulverizing it too
>a hatch opens in its stock, releasing a swarm of regular-sized Mosins that fly straight for Earth
>Mosins fall from the sky onto every land mass on the planet
>the bass-boosted version of the soviet national anthem starts playing from an indeterminable source, so loud that it shatters every glass object in existence
>everyone starts building cubes of Mosins and bow to them at the start of every day as thanks to Tovarisch SpessMosin for removing spacerock for the glorious Earth Motherland