SELF DEFENSE:

sit on the intruders head and rip a big fart

>>34302581

>sit on the intruders head and rip a big fart

Why is a 10 year old on this Norwegian car maintenance fourm?

>>34302582
Whatever loser! You are just angry because he made fun of you because of your big stupid butt.

well according to the British, a van will do

>>34302580
Get on your knees and beg

>>34302580
Booby trap your house with bombs

>>34302580
A hatchet, small easy to use, legal and guaranteed to fuck shit up!

Unironically an axe and shield.

>>34302580

stones

not even kidding

>>34302583

>Whatever loser! You are just angry because he made fun of you because of your big stupid butt.

underage and b&

>>34302580

Well-trained female German Shepherd.

It'll rip the throat out of anyone trying to hurt you or your kids.

>>34302582

>bitching about 10 year olds during summer

Lurk moar.

File: 1484775760853.png (663KB, 760x768px) Image search: [Google]

663KB, 760x768px

>>34302580
Toaster sock

>>34302589
how about i pull an anitfa and use bricks?

File: image.jpg (2MB, 2592x1936px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 2592x1936px

>homedefense
selfreloading 12 gauge shotgun with 7 shot mag front grip, pistole grip and shoulder stock. Use buck shot
>outside
Glock 21 cal. 45 or a sig sauer P226 cal. 357 sig
If I can get guns in cuckmany you can get them too.
If not use an ax

>>34302586
Youll go to jail for this,no lie

>>34302580

bbc

>>34302580
Also where you from? Uk?

>>34302580
A gun

>>34302597
The greatest country in the world

Aluminum baseball bat. Get a glove and ball too, so it looks less like a weapon of premeditation.

Bladed knuckles/Trench knife, or two knives in each hand.

The knuckles/trench knife do lots of intimidating damage and are awkward to defend against.

Two knives means you'll be able to strike with one hand while the attacker tries to disarm the other.

>>34302581
Fpbp

>>34302580
A good offense.

>>34302599
That would mean ypu are from the us so you can get funs

I have a coin jar I'll dump into sock and beat the intruderwith that

Taser. That way friendly fire is safe.

Stickshot
https://youtu.be/HNuwxjBMDEU

>>34302580
Be a gentleman and use a smallsword. It's light, easy to wear, and it's basically a death spike with a handle attached to it. Or you can just use a knife.

>>34302580
Claymore mines on trip wires
Dogs

>>34302588
>axe
>not sword
Stabbing lets you control the hallway better

>>34302580
Your penis.

Short sword/gladius. Maybe even a shield with it. The problem with an axe is the range of motion, if you miss on the first swing, an intruder with a knife could easily deliver a fatal stab. A short sword gives you a quicker attack, and has plenty of stabbing and or slashing capability.

>>34302580
House wide fire surpression system and a personal oxygen supply.

Sword. Preferably something stabby since homes are small, and if it's long it should be capable of half-swording. Alternatively a spear.

Also gel/foam pepper spray or any other ranged weapons. It must be gel or foam so you don't mist up your yourself. Pepper spray with one hand. Have your shank stick ready in the other hand in case the spray doesn't work