How would /k/ defend themselves agsinst graboids?

*against

>>34226176
Don't live in Perfection Valley.

>>34226176
.600 nitro express

Let them break into my rec room.

>>34226257
they have gotten out of perfection valley are currently as far as africa.

>>34226330
They can't. Perfection valley is one of the few places the rock and soil structure can allow them to live.

>>34226375
>has not seen Tremors 1-5 + the television series.
what a chump.

>>34226176
5lbs of tannerite hidden in a dead burro as bait,and some .223

>>34226176
Elephant gun. Just need to lure it into your basement first.

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>>34226176
pic related

Pipe bombs and a .50 cal seemed to work quite well.

>>34226633
I don't think the dead donkey would work. It's been a while since I saw the movie, but I think they only respond to ground vibrations.

>>34226176
.22lr

truck mounted quad 30cal

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>>34228079
Shove a vibrator up it's ass

>>34228567
damn, beat me to it

>>34226449
I've seen all of them, and besides Perfection Valley all graboid infestations were wiped out.

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Go to the graboid bar and graboid the ass of the graboid's gf.

>>34226176
the same way we deal with negroids

>>34226449
Theres a 5th one?

>>34229305
We don't talk about that.

>>34229305
Ya, I think it came out in 2015. And yes, Michael Gross is still in it.

>>34226257
Want to know why they call it "Perfection Valley"?

I'll give you a hint, try to name a single black person that lives there.

>>34229333
God bless that man

I want him to break out as a sort of Bruce Campbell type. Only where Bruce played the 'Johnny Bravo' type hero, Micheal would play the 'probably crazy, but awesome' type

>>34229386
There must have been a few, but they're so fucking loud and obnoxious, they're basically graboid bait

Actually

>live in Tremor-world
>Nogs are irritatingly plentiful
>Launch media campaign to convince black people that wearing tap shoes and lit road flares are fashionable
>Also convince them that desert life is ideal for nogs (because it is)
>continue until that 13% is 1% or less

>>34226375
They made entire movies about graboids in South Africa and Mexico you dingus

>>34231272
Mexico had a similar soil structure to Perfection. Graboids are an ancient species that were only able to exist in a few locations worldwide due to ideal rock strata.

God, do you even fucking lore you inbred mongoloid son of a bitch?

>>34231328
No shit, he didn't even bother to mention the other locations you dumb son of a bitch, learn some reading comprehension

>>34231363
Maybe he should you hick ass mother fucker.

>>34226375
>Perfection valley is one of the few places the rock and soil structure can allow them to live.

>>34231391
>>34226330
>They have gotten as far as Africa
>>34226375
>They can't

Not my fault you're fucking retarded and damage controlling now, moron

>>34231417
>Can be literally anywhere in the world except for few we places with special ground

>Oh no! The Graboids are going to get me.

>>34226257
>Don't live in Perfection Valley.

This ass hole's point stands.

>>34231486
>My stupidity got btfo and now I look like a retard so I'll be a salty little pussy about it: the post

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>>34231518

>>34226176
Don't be the Black guy.
He always dies first.

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>>34226176
>Be 1999
>Keyboard class (kids are raised on the Internet they probably don't have that now)
>Have a tremors discussion
>Friend doesn't believe Tremors call them assblasters
>He puts up a search engine and looks up "assblasters"
>A bunch of porn shows up (again, 1999 our firewalls and such weren't what they are today)
>Teacher walks by, a kid with a computer full of anal porn
>He has to spend 30 minutes explaining assblasters are the offspring of graboids, and he was a good boy that dindu nuffin

>>34229305
Jaimie Kennedy felt the need to use the Tremors series to remind everyone that he exists.

>>34226176
lots of bullets

>>34231541
i don't think there were any black guys in tremors
an asian guy sure, but that is a preferred minority

>>34231787
I remember this movie being called Shazaam with a different black actor.

>>34226176
>how will I defend myself against fictional creatures
A reprogrammed t800

>>34228053

pipe bomb and rc cars worked even better, cost less too.

>>34228835
Don't grab an Assblaster's ass anon.

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>>34226176
I think I'll be fine.

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>search assblaster on google images
>this shows up
alright i'm out

>>34231943
Not just any asian he was Grandpa in 3 ninjas

>>34228567
Only works on deer.

>>34232236
more importantly he was egg shen in big trouble in little china

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>>34232213
I'm not even phased by this shit anymore. I have been in this hell hole for far to long.

>>34232212
Thats so fucking redundant though.
Why two shotguns?

>>34226449
>>34229305
>>34229333
>>34231796

So the first one is the ground worms one. 2nd has the little buggers that run on the surface. 3rd is ass blasters and the 4th went back in time to old west.

I did not know there was a 5th one. im gonna have to go buy it now. also did not know they made a fucking series of it.

>>34232213
Fucking LOL

>>34232342
5th was in africa.
It was ok.
The only good ones where the first and second IMO.

>>34231943
The old ones had the token blacks.

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Our hero is anti gun.

>>34231943
>but that is a preferred minority
Ah yes, the classic liberal bullshit. We hand over our fucking country to the brown hordes but it's never enough. Fuck off

>>34230243
That'd be great is Gross wasn't a hardcore gun grabber.

>>34232413
sadly, this is true

>>34232412
i'll admit it has been a little bit since i have watched tremors, but as i recall there weren't any blacks, the cast was almost all white except one mexican and one chinaman. i don't remember any blacks in the later movies either

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>>34232319
That's my elephant gun you ignoramus. A William Moore & Co. 8-gauge side by side slug gun. Powerful enough to crack open a grabboid's beak under 3 feet of dirt. But then again we wouldn't be having this lovely little chat if you had even a clue of what we're dealing with here.

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>>34232413
This scene traumatized my little cousin when she was a toddler.
>At Aunt and Uncle's for holidays
>Thought cousins had gone to bed to wait for Santa
>Brothers and I see Tremors 2 is on tv, decide to watch it
>This scene comes up
>Little cousin out of know where
>Wanted to show us her dolly
>Sees ass-blaster on tv
>"Puppy! :D" she shrieks with delight
>Don'tTouchThatDial.jpg
>Burt pulls the trigger
>The puppy explodes in a shower of sherbet blood and gore
>My cousin's face when
>Stares in shock and horror for a few seconds
>Breaks the silence with the shrill screaming only a toddler can produce
>Runs away to be consoled by her mom
>Almost get in trouble, thankfully Aunt is super chill and understands we had no time to change it, and that her daughter should have been in bed.

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fucking bring it