Drunk self defense

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you have one choice,

master the drunken master.

pic related

>>33991471
The one with a gun

sucker punch fu

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>>33991471
What are you? A idiot?

>>33991490
Do I have to go to China?

Do they have good drink?

>>33991471
Look up Zui Quan Kung Fu

The entire martial art is about fooling your enemy into thinking you're drunken dumbass when you're really shifting your momentum into performing strikes

As dumb as it sounds it's a real thing

But will it work if I actually am a drunken, but graceful, dumbass?

>>33991471
>being an alcoholic
>getting in constant fights
>probably at Buffalo Wild Wings or some shit
>would rather get drunk every day than carry a sidearm to protect yourself

You sound like a colossal faggot.

>>33991471
dont hang out where drunk frat boys congregate and go to a real bar.

Sports bars are gay.

I used to have the same issue, always a drunk kid trying to prove something to his friends, Ive been sucker punched in the back of the fucking head at least half a dozen times. I won every time thanks to having a coconut head but getting sucker punched all the time by manchildren got old.

Hang out where adults do. Im sure you can find a halfway decent bar with pool tables that isnt full of retards. One day you're going to eat a bottle to the face by someone whos dad has enough to pay for a jew lawyer.

Not Op but as a guy with no martial arts training,would kick boxing or BJJ be the best to learn first as a basis?

>>33991588
It's a town full of roughnecks, so adults persay.

>>33991597
Either or, preferably both. Im doing BJJ now but I had waaaaay more fun with Muay Thai.

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>>33991471
I'm not sure there's any martial arts that take retarded students into account with their teachings.

>>33991580
Takes one to know one you degenerate

>>33991610
Men older than 21 who have to peacock their masculinity are not men, just larger boys.

Ive seen people get seriously fucked up in bars, its not worth being in that kind of environment. Like I said im sure you can find a bar where retards or slightly less retarded roughnecks hang. Maybe find a place that actually has good beer and not shit macro brews that attract dumbasses.

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>>33991650
Sounds like you need pic related.

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>>33992539
Then you can go to pic related! Poor anon fag.