help! need good story

>>33690961
You were trying to hire a tranny hooker under a bridge but one drugged one starting yelling about daddy leaving him alone and cut you with a box cutter. Then you ran into the street passing out from it all. The first car that stopped thought you were one of the trannys and brought you back to his place. You awoke later at the hospital, your arm and ass hurt. You now have 17 new contacts on your phone. All guy names.

>>33690961
>"My arm?"
>"You see, I used to own a Glock..."

Lying about a scar it isn't going to make you cooler or more appealing to anyone who isn't still in middle school.

Fuck off and delete this thread. Check em

>>33690961
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

Well dubs OP here.
Was in second grade, racing my sister, "finish line" was a door with old glass Windows. Was a fat kid thought this the one I'm going to win. Called upon tard strength powered past her. At this point it was still a close race. Reached for "finish line" tard strength still going strong ran right into door, arm straight through.

>>33691136
The autism is strong with this one, can't understand sarcasm.

> I'm an autist who can't measure out powder

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Just say "psycho ex" and refuse to elaborate. They'll do the work for you, conjuring up a ridiculous scenario.

If you absolutely have to say more, just say "I don't want to talk about him."

You challenged Oddjob to a duel. You knew that there was no way he could beat you, you had even brought your custom Factory New Marble Fade StatTrak Fedora.

You stood apart, waiting to throw. The referee blew the whistle. You let Oddjob throw first since you knew it'd give you more points towards being a Supreme Gentleman. As the hat was hurtling towards you, you had a frightening thought... You hadn't read your daily chapter of Richard Dawkins...

You leant back, hoping that the dodge would work in combination with the small amount of euphoria you had left in your body. You managed to escape it. Except your arm.
Agonising pain shot through your body as you felt the pig iron lining Oddjob's hat burn against your skin. Even through the pain you could tell that the metal wasn't even folded. In this moment, all you could do was think of your waifu to help you power through. Luckily, you had enough atheist memes memorised to create a mildly effective barrier, and the hat only contacted you for a fraction of a second.

Now it was your turn.

You knew you had to get revenge, not just for your pride, but for the honor of your clan. You tipped your fedora off and held it ready.
"Please forgive me master, but I'll have to go all out. Just. This. Once." you said, chuckling to yourself. This fool had no idea what he was in for.
Performing your secret hidden jutsu, you threw the hat with the strength of your ancestors. Oddjob's body began to break down the moment your fedora touched him.
You couldn't let it end like this you thought. You unsheathed your katana and teleported behind him. Just as his body was leaving this plane of existence, you whispered into his ear the last words that he would ever hear.
"Heh..."
"Nothing personal"

>>33691421
I kinda wanna know sauce

>>33691464
https://youtu.be/wMmxm3z3qQ0

Faggot.

>>33690961
I was an edgy emo teen, who hated my middle class parents

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>>33691459
Op
Way better than tarding into a door...

>>33690961

You slipped in the kitchen while drunk and scraped your arm along the corner of the countertop. Fin.

>>33691496
reshpek

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Op
To be fair...the lighter part of the scar is unrelated to the "finish line" indecent.
However it does involve my tard strength.
Any machinist out there? I broke a burr whip on a shity casting and drug it down my arm.
Pic related...that's a burr whip.

>OP makes some kind of bizarre humblebragging thread to talk about his scars
magical place

>>33691634
I'll have you know I'm quite acident prone.
"Chicks dig scars and glory lasts forever" -some movie with Keanu reeves in it.

>>33691614
machinist here, seen someone run away from their Bridgeport totally soaked in blood. Tripped into a fly cutter and sliced all the way down his arm.

>>33690961
My daddy cut me when we were playing catholic priests and boy

>>33691881
Damn i bet that was ugly. guy I worked with stuck a center through his hand...

say you and your crazy cousins from the country were blowing up propane tanks and a piece of shrapenal cut you

say shit like they had to carry you 2 miles to their truck to drive 2 hours to get stitches

>>33690961
Get the fuck off the internet Sean. I remember when you cauterized all your fucking paper cuts so that they would scar.

>>33690961
Chronic masterbation injury.
You lost your footing shoving a dildo up your ass, and put your arm through a window.

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>>33690961
>that skinny wrist
>all the baby fat on your upper arm

I'm guessing that you got the scar from masturbating.

You were working as a chaiwalla in this Bangalore telemarketing form when your brother dared you to go and shit in the river. While you were shitting your brother pushed over the shit house and it fell into the river. But that's not what caused it.

You and the shithouse floated down the river to the ocean, where you you collided with a boat carrying a Bengal tiger. The tiger jumped on the shithouae and tore the roof open, but that's not what did it.

The tiger falls in the water and drowns. You passed out and woke up on a train without having any idea where you were or how you got there. In an effort to escape the train, you jump to the ground while the train was slowing near some bushes and used the bushes to break your fall, but that's not what did it.

You climb out of the bushes and see a huge alien spaceship crashing toward you with a smoking fighter jet falling out of the sky behind it. This fighter pilot climbs out of the crashed jet and opens the spaceship and yells "welcome to earth motherfucker" at the alien inside and punches it in what must be it's face. The fighter pilot takes you to barbecue at some shitty piano bar and the waitress wala past you with a broken pint glass. But that's not what did it.

Your arm was itchy and you scratched it and it left a scar.

>>33690961
>Weapons related
Fuck off underageb&

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>>33691230
Nobody got dubs...?

>>33693866
:)

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@33697299
CHECKED

>>33697348
>@
Fuck off

>>33693866
we have a winner
I hope you enjoy your new totally real and canonical life story

>>33691086
Rolling for this.