Writefag general v. whatever

Video gaming had never caught on with the rest of the galaxy. Sure, there were minor puzzle games, and the galactic mobile smash hit "Minesweeper", but there were so many things to amuse oneself with on a large station or city-planet that gaming was minimal. This was not the case for humans, however. Their planet had bred them to be predatory animals; they were always restless during their waking hours, needing some sort of task or stimulation. Something to soothe the primal part of their brains that allowed them to be such efficient hunters.

Evidently one of the humans had illicitly smuggled some antique device onto the ship, as well as a massive holoscreen that had been hastily modified to accept a primitive input jack. I was introduced to this equipment my first day after I had been found walking the halls marveling at the primitive technology that had somehow blasted these rejects off their planet and into the company of other species. One of the humans had said, "Hey, Zrrk, have you ever played Call of Duty before?" When I questioned what exactly that was, I was dragged into crew lounge where there was apparently already a game in progress.

There were four humans sitting in front of the holoscreen, animatedly chatting as the screen displayed what appeared to be four heavily armed humans in combat attire. The human who dragged me in excitedly announced that he and I "got next." For a few moments I tried to make sense of the game as all four players' avatars jumped and ran around the screen. When their avatars finally came together, I witnessed the most horrifying thing I had ever seen to this point in my life- two of the avatars had just used primitive weapons to obliterate the other two avatars. An explanation was quickly given as to what exactly a "shotgun" with "buckshot" does. Blood sprayed across the screen as time and again the pairs of humans would locate and kill each other in game. As time passed, I witnessed "machine guns", "melee kills", and even a strange victory dance called "tea bagging." Particularly gruesome "kills" were played and replayed in slow motion as limbs were removed from their owners, entrails were removed, and brain matter was splashed like paint against a new starship's hull.

My stomach couldn't handle the violence. I started to feel sick, my saliva getting thicker as the acrid taste of bile began to make me retch. I ran to the nearest trash can and violently emptied my stomach, tasting the awful nutrition supplements a second time. The smell was overpowering, and that's when all sound from the group of humans stopped as the game was paused. Two humans had also run to trash cans as they were what humans called "sympathy pukers", while the other two were red in the face as they could not breathe from laughing so hard. This was soon ended, however, as they both began to accidentally inhale massive mouthfuls of vomit tinged air. "I CAN TASTE IT!" exclaimed one. "OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK!" yelled the other. They both evacuated the room as the first two humans and I continued to regret eating so much for dinner, laughing all the way down the hallway.

Hopefully the rest of the galaxy is not exposed to this kind of horrific entertainment.

tl:dr

>>33628919
someone REALLY liked 40mm

>>33628930
Oh it's another one of theeeese threads...

>hurr durr humans are special believe me!
>oh so unique and important!

It's just arrogant and silly, humanocentricity that is.

>>33629714
Get on the human supremacist train or get the fuck off the planet.

>>33629765
human needs come before all, but don't pretend we're magnificent angels shitting gold nuggets and breathing fire.

>>33629780
name a single other animal thats closer to an angel

File: brotherhood_until_the_last_second_by_badillafloyd-d4y1knm.jpg (264KB, 1297x615px) Image search: [Google]

264KB, 1297x615px

Mars. 09/21/2142. Gagaringrad Defence Line.

>It had taken three days to crawl here. Three whole days of crawling through the ruin and wreckage of war.
>Three days of crawling through the bodies of both friend and foe, three days of avoiding detection.
>All for one shot.
>Sergi Popov checked his rifle again.
>The PTRB-14 was a marvel of Novarus weapons manufacture.
>Firing the 14.5x115mm, it had a 98% hit probability on human targets up to 2500M.
>Mostly used against infantry exoskeletons and IFV's, this rifle was the only tool that could be used.
>The target? The Earth Union Army General Sebastian Quinn.
>The EU had declared that Mars, due to being newly terraformed was required to take up to 3 BILLION "refugees".
>E.g. mostly useless, welfare dependents that had never worked in their lives.
>We the Novarus, has spent nearly a century making Mars a paradise.
>And to be told that we "must" take nearly half our population in worthless mouths to feed?
>We refused.
>We were called racist, sexist, bigots. We were told that diversity enriches your culture.
>We seceded.
>The EU sent it's Army.
>Comprised mostly of Muslims, Trannies, and niggers the EUA was routed in every battle.
>However, the sheer numbers were grinding us down. For every one we killed, 5 more would take their place.
>There had been soldiers found whose rifle barrels had literally melted from so many rounds fired through.
>Sergi had seen battlefields where you could walk nearly 5km without touching the soil.
>The EU forses would have been laughable if we had enough ammo to kill them all.
>By the second year, things had changed.
>The muslims, trannies, and niggers we fought were replaced by white males.
>Drafted into service, their families being held hostage by the EU the new soldiers fought desperately.
>With new command staff, the EAU has turned the tide, inflicting defeat after defeat.

>>33628919
Oh wow, a HFY thread, what a blast from the past. A thread had to die for this crap.