What's the most innocuous object you can carry in your pocket

>>33564874
Leave those poor kids at your school alone.

>>33564874

A locking pocket knife that you use as a letter opener or box cutter at work.

>>33564874
Thick, steel-barrelled pen.
In some places, carrying a roll of coins is a misdemeanor due to people using them as weapons in street fights.

>>33564942
This. A folding box-cutter/carpet knife is innocuous enough, but will spill someone's gut in a hurry.

>>33564949
Lmao

>>33564874
padlock on a chain for your "bike"
bic lighter does about the same job as the roll of coins

>>33564874
Sturdy pen. Personally i always went with a nice center punch though. Only really effective when used to strike the skull, eye, joints, or certain pressure points though.

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bar blade

NO FUCKING CONTEST

>>33566679
How do you use it? Stab?

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>>33566707
dig it in their head. hold with ice pick grip (thumb over either end with fingers wrapped around the long part). aim for the skull, joints, soft parts wherever, it hurts like fuck. they're usually 6" long by 2" wide which is perfect for holding as a weapon and perfect for being pocket sized unless you wear girly jeans with shallow pockets

>>33566063
>>33566679
>>33567252
A multitool / Leatherman is the correct answer.
Is actually useful
roll of coins
ice pick grip someones skull in

>>33567288
britbongistani so rolls of coins don't exist here unless you make your own with sellotape and a leatherman could see you being arrested and taken to court and prosecuted for carrying an offensive weapon (the memes on /pol/ & /k/ are 98% true).

so options are extremely limited, thus bar blade. don't currently have one though as mine was pinched so will be getting another one. currently just carry a sharpie to use as a kubaton

>>33564874
Roll of coins is retarded. Learn how to make a proper fist. Roll of coins makes you more likely to strike with your relatively delicate finger bones, when you should be striking with the knuckles of your hand since they better fall in line with your forearm and are thus better supported.
Make your fingers tight, and then close your thumb around the first finger only. This strengthens the wrist and helps keep your fingers behind your knuckles.

>>33564874
Probably a Leatherman that had a knife as one of its tools. Making a case for it as an "offensive weapon" would be a stretch, especially with its main tool being a pliers. Just carry one and - this is key - DON'T MAKE A BIG DEAL ABOUT IT HAVING A KNIFE. If anyone asks why you have one, open it and show them the pliers and the screwdriver bits. Tell them that you have it for work, or for hiking, or JIC. Don't even mention the knife blade.

People get way overly worried about the police here. If you're 1) white 2) not visibly a chav, a junkie, or a football hooligan 3) dressed decently 4) not in a bad neighborhood and/or obviously looking for trouble, the odds that the cops will ever bother you approach approximately zero. So carry your Leatherman and don't worry too much.

Keys on a real climbing carabineer? Improvised knuckles and if the cops ask, you use the carabineer to hang the keys off a key rack and make them more noticeable so you don't forget/lose them.

>>33564874

Kubotan.

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Flashlight. Probably in 2x CR123 or a slim 18650 size. More utility than a roll of coins, has a pocket clip for quick access, may have pointy edges for additional bludgeoning

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>>33564874
>$50 tactical flash light, with lanyard for wrist.

Shine 1,000lux of light into their eye sockets.

Hit them with flashlight repeatably.

Other wise, cell phone two shot derringer.

>>33564874
Oh and your body.

Just takes years of training.

Martial arts rule.

>>33570370
It works pretty awesome.

You should be able to fly with it.

A gun

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a fucking gun?

>>33572218
What. The. Fuck. Is. Going. On. In. That. Picture.

>>33564874
3 half dollars, stick em between your fingers and punch, and potentially break your hand but idgaf, i have insurance. maybe a box cutter or a pocket knife.

>>33566063
Maybe with a small aerosol can?