>implying you have time to stop THIS

>>32987550
He's a good boy.

>>32987550
Looks like I have plenty of time.

File: 1457035412077.jpg (15KB, 322x322px) Image search: [Google]

15KB, 322x322px

>>32987550
h-hes fast

>>32987550

>hits the pause button

Checkmate.

>>32987550
It's amazing how fast they can move. That one isn't even trying. I've seen grizzly chase down deer.
Fortunately, there is generally a bit of posturing before they charge. That's when you ready your weapon.

>>32987550

Why would I want to?

We share this Earth with all creatures. If I am made to sacrifice myself to mother nature then let it come. It's a thing of beauty to be a part of the cycle of life. To be entwined with a beautiful animal's life eternally is to become one with the universe. I will gladly offer my flesh to begin that transformation. I will open my arms and know that the love I have for this creature is reciprocated and we shall go on his glorious bear journey as one. My body is nothing more than a vessel for Mother Earth to transfer energy from one life form to another.

File: 00011104.jpg (388KB, 3200x2134px) Image search: [Google]

388KB, 3200x2134px

>>32987561
this

>>32987596
Hi Jill

File: bears.webm (1MB, 960x540px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 960x540px

hooh

>>32987550
>charging bear
>video of a bear fucking right off

I swear all the bear fear shit comes from city folk who don't realize that Alaska is a horrifying deathtrap and that you can't find a bear (that hasn't been fed) that will do anything other than run away.

Moose on the other hand.
Moose will fucking kill you.

>>32987659
Fuck, obligatory

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3qhEIZBlX8

>>32987659
Yeah nah, fucking everything in AK will kill your ass.

Source: Hunted moose, bear, ur mum

File: Beartrain.webm (2MB, 640x352px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 640x352px

>>32987550

>>32987720
This bear takes the short bus to bear school

>>32987779
In the video it gets shot that's why it's stumbling

>>32987682
>that you can't find a bear
There was supposed to be a "In the contiguous US" after that, I forgot.

Alaska is the exception. Black bears and brown bears (at least where I live) are huge pussies, and even if they attacked would drop easily even with LOL9mm.

Moose weigh like 10 times as much as black bears, run way faster, and attack if you look at them wrong, yet the general response to seeing a moose is "wooooow, so natural, it's so majestic" and the response to bears is usually unintelligible screeching.

>>32987596
Possibly the gayest thig I've ever read.

>>32987669
damnit I was here to see a bear kill somebody

>>32987659
Fuck Moose. I hear people call deer forest niggers but Moose are literally nigger tier.

>>32987924
That's because people automatically assume prey animals are harmless and cute

I've gotten the shit bit out of me by a wolf hybrid and a rabbit, The fucking rabbit caused more damage because those fuckers dig in and thrash like little fucking pit bulls.

>>32987645
why cant all bears just be chill af like this....

i would go out of my way to go full green peace/peta for bears if they weren't such ass holes more than half the time.

imagine a world where we could just like coexist with them, go out fishing, see a bear, "oh hey mr. bear have a fish i caought in your stream!", bear chills and hangs out "this my human now."

>>32988017
reddit

>>32987669
hahahahaha me if i was a bear.

>ok ok lady ill stop
>yo wudup you got some food plz?
>AWWWWHHHHHS SHIT BEAR SPRAY
>YO FUCK YO KIYAK BITCH
>IMA EAT YO KIYAK
>fuckin bitch sprays me and.....fuck your kiyak....

File: 1484844548072.jpg (72KB, 601x384px) Image search: [Google]

72KB, 601x384px

>>32987996
I still have scars from being attacked by a fucking woodchuck. It was in my shop, and dug in fucking tight. I opened up the door (bigass garage door type thing) and tried to chase it out with a stick. Every time it got in the open though it would see me and run right back under some shelving.

So, me being the intellectual giant that I am, I decided that the next time I chased it out of the shelving I would just grab the fucking thing and chuck it. So, I did that, but as I was throwing it it fucking bit into my finger, and kept biting various parts of my hands as I punched the shit out of it trying to get it to let go of whatever it was hanging onto at that particular moment. Eventually I got it off me, and luckily it fucked right off back under the shelving. At that point I had to call animal control to get it tested for rabies and it turned into a pain in the ass. Animal control dude had a suppressed 10/22, and was in general a cool guy. Watching the woodchuck get shot was also satisfying. I never like the bastards, but that incident moved them to the top of the kill on sight list.

It goes
1. Woodchuck
2. Rabbit
3. Otter
4. Coyote
5. Fishercat (residual hatred from when I had chickens, they won that war)

>>32987924
"Brown bears" are grizzlies and not pussies. That being said, there are black bears with brown coats that are often called "brown bears" as a misnomer.

>>32987573
DAMN YOU KEYBOARD WARRIOR! YOU WIN THIS TIME!

>>32988131
Pls tell fisher cat story

>>32987550
>HE WAS COMIN' RIGHT AT ME!

File: alaskan ouch.webm (357KB, 720x404px) Image search: [Google]

357KB, 720x404px

>Plenty of time

>>32988377
What am I looking at here?

File: 56785679.png (108KB, 284x177px) Image search: [Google]

108KB, 284x177px

>>32987550
Bear hold a special place of fear in my heart.

We've all seen pictures of dogs absolutely fucking rekt'd with 197 quills sticking out of their eye balls. Because animals fight or flight response makes them absolutely insane when pain is stimulating them.

Scared that shooting a bear will just make it angrier and even more likely to continue to charge and then rip me open like a twinky wrapper. Can a bear survive 16 rounds of 9mm? I don't fucking want to find out.

>>32988399
gopro alaskan bro shooting a revolver

File: 1485621084559-k.png (727KB, 680x1190px) Image search: [Google]

727KB, 680x1190px

>>32988250
>there are black bears that are brown
Man fuck this shit.

>>32988428
just carry 45-70

will kill a skyscraper in one shot

File: Para fal.jpg (8KB, 259x194px) Image search: [Google]

8KB, 259x194px

Not even memeing, a fal or similar rifle would be the best anti bear gun. Its already killed every animal in Africa to boot.

If you cannot kill it with 20+1 rounds of 7.62, it does not deserve to die.

File: tibetan-mastiff-facts-cover-1.png (427KB, 730x370px) Image search: [Google]

427KB, 730x370px

We should have bred bears like we did with wolves.

Could have had bear bros

Can you imagine the tibetan mastiff of bears?

File: 1475691574634.jpg (113KB, 500x281px) Image search: [Google]

113KB, 500x281px

>>32988322
They're small, fast, and unstoppable killing machines. Combine that with the fact that chickens are fucking retarded and you have a recipe for slaughter.

Chickens were the first animal I tried to raise, I thought it would be easy, and if it weren't for the fucking fishercats it would have been. I built a little coop, bought six chickens, let them eat bugs out in the field, basic stuff. I was enjoying fresh eggs, life was pretty good. Then, one morning when I went out to get eggs, I saw some blood outside the door of the coop. I opened the door, and the inside looked like a goddamn horror movie. 5 chickens were completely decapitated, one chicken's head was hanging on by a bit of gristle. There was blood coating all the walls, arterial spray on the ceiling, and puddles on the floor. It ate maybe half of one chicken, I really don't know because all of the chickens were in pieces all over the coop. I didn't even know about fishercats at this time so I was confused as shit, I had assumed foxes were what ate chickens, and there was no way a fox could get into the coop. Lo and behold, fishercat can dig quickly, maneuver through seemingly impossibly small holes, and do so without waking the chickens. Also, they don't kill what they eat, they just kill. If you had a hundred chickens in a coop and a fishercat got in, you would wake up with a hundred dead chickens. They also seem to have a fetish for decapitation, so it's a bitch to clean up. I had to powerwash the coop a couple times to get the blood out.

So, I decided it wouldn't be a huge deal, and just turned the coop into a chicken Fort Knox. Metal fencing under the floor, steel plates at the seams, some indescribably complex contraption for securing the door, etc.

Which worked for a while, I found scratches in the wood where the fishercat had found weak spots and scraped in until it hit metal, and I thought I had won.

'cont

>>32987645

I'm almost certain bears could be domesticated and turned into utilitarian animals like dogs and horses.

>>32988399

.454 Casul one handed

>>32988528
>bears could be domesticated

Well yeah, you ever seen those Russian bear circuses

>not having an AK pistol as your defense for bears

I feel like several rounds of x39 would mess a bear's face and shoulders up pretty badly

>>32987596
Bro, do you fuck bears???

>>32987645
Why the fuck are they so cute? Like 500 lb fluffy dogs that can and will tear the shit out of you.

File: Russian Bear invading United States of America.jpg (200KB, 1600x816px) Image search: [Google]

200KB, 1600x816px

What if they're already there?

>>32988515
Then, one day, while the chickens were out in the field, I heard a loud squawk. I didn't really think anything of it at first, chickens squawk for pretty much no reason. Then, I heard another squawk, and a shitload more squawking. I run out to the front of the house and I see the chickens running in circles like a bunch of retards. Then, I see a flash and a chicken disappear into the grass. I grabbed my trusty 10/22 and proceeded to attempt to removed fishercat. I magdumped a bit to try and scare it off, didn't do shit, watched another chicken go down. I fired into where the chicken dropped trying to hit it, saw another chicken drop 10 yards away. I decided the first priority was to rescue the chickens, and ran to the coop, opened the door and began clanking the can (I would hit a can at night near the coop then put down food to get them in) the chickens started to run over. As they did, the rearmost chickens started getting picked off. I didn't fire because I didn't want to scare the chickens away. After the first couple got in I saw the grass moving near what was now the rearmost chicken. I called it acceptable losses, aimed, and emptied the gun into the chicken and its surrounding area.

I counted the chickens, I went from 12 to seven in the space of 90 seconds, then I went around and looked for corpses. There was no dead fishercat, and no sign that it had been wounded. The only time I ever actually saw the damn thing was in the morning about a week later when I went out to get eggs, it was just sitting on top of the coop like the smug bastard he was. I tried putting chicken corpses out in the open as bait, no dice. Tried the same thing with a live chicken, nothing. About two weeks later it got into the coop again, no fucking clue how, and killed everything. It was at that point that I admitted I was bested, and gave up on raising chickens. Now I just raise trout.

Video of fishercat wrecking shit.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7smmd_AgAw4

>>32988679
Oh yeah, they also do this. Fucking fishercats.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HrvdzCGjbzw

>>32988679
>>32988690
>that fucking sound

Holy christ in heaven absolutely fucking no. Also that second part reminded me of this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cr1MvzAr26E

>>32988679
>>32988515

Motion sensor lights on the coop.... ring up a buzzer so when the lights tripped in the middle of the night you wakeup.
Grab rifle
Remove kakeb.

They dont even think twice about a light, and it blinds the area. so they ignore you... easy kill, should take less then 5 mins.

>Source : My fucking life.
>Ive almost completely decimated the population this side of the river and nothing of value was lost

>>32988762
Do any kind of domesticated animal hunt or have the ability to fuck these things up? Or will a farm dog just get it's eyeballs ripped out?

File: IMG_4128.jpg (91KB, 598x570px) Image search: [Google]

91KB, 598x570px

>>32988528
Yeah and they can be soldiers too
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wojtek_(bear)

>>32988762
How do you even hit the fucks? I can't see them when they're standing still, and they move way too fast to hit them on the run.

Whatever, I'm happy with "raising" trout, which entails sipping coffee on your porch while doing literally nothing until they grow to the right size, then eating them.

I might try chickens again though, who knows.

>>32988547
circus bears are just trained from stolen cubs

domesticated means you control their reproduction and breed for desireable traits

>>32988807
A pet pig will destroy just about anything.

>>32988528
It would take generations to do, and a relatively large population to get the desires traits without risking inbreeding.

>>32988528
What would bears be good for?

>hauling shit
Horses, mules, donkeys, oxen do that shit better
>hunting
A pack of dogs is better for this

The only thing I can think of is perhaps bears have sensitive noses and can sniff out truffles? But pigs do that already

>>32988919
Then we can get silverback gorillas to take care of all the feral boar.

>>32987645
>Hey, I'm gonna grab a beer, you want anything?
>See if there's still any Dr. Pepper left in the cooler?
>'Kay. Keep filming, I'll brb.
>Thx, bear.

>>32988131
Will it fuck up a 10/22 if you manually load single rounds of .22 short and shoot them?

>>32988500
AKs work too, 30 rounds of 7.62x39 seems effective enough.

>>32987720
They die so adorably :(

>>32989122
>Why would you want basically a big dog?

File: colt ad better than a guard dog.jpg (77KB, 500x533px) Image search: [Google]

77KB, 500x533px

>>32988679
From the looks of one, a rat trap or mouse trap might work. Bout the right size for one, should have built traps into the enclosure. Make it think there's an easy hole just for it, but no it's a trap smashed like a mouse.

>>32988919
I dunno, but if I lived rural anywhere I'd probably get one and do my best to train it to attack things. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1HBaa1UAh4

>>32989122
>What would bears be good for?
>Entire thread is about how deadly they are

Gee I dunno.

>he doesn't want to ride into battle on a bear

>>32989122
You can ride them

>>32988017
>why cant all bears just be chill af like this

Most are. My buddy hiked the entire PCT and ran into countless bears. Every one of them ran away as soon as it saw him. They're way more afraid of you than you are of them.

>>32989455
This
I must know

File: black bear.webm (2MB, 406x720px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 406x720px

Bears are timid creatures.

>>32989596
That cat just got a helluva ego boost right there.

File: piggy.jpg (128KB, 960x540px) Image search: [Google]

128KB, 960x540px

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAoADOgG8tI


>Lights are off, no cars home.
>Break in quietly and listen for an alarm.
>Hear snort from one of the bedrooms.
>Think to self, some fat fat fuck must be home.
>I'll just tie him up.
>walk into room, notice 2 tons of pork sleeping.
>One notices me and squeels.
>heads towards me, the others are waking up.
>Mag dump into the first one.
>Takes most the magazine to bring down.
>The rest charge.
>Manage to put last two rounds in the second boar, but he trips me before going down.
>scramble on floor, as they close in.
>Magazine empty, I punch the 300 pound animal that's on top of me as hard as I can.
>Does literally nothing, I feel tusks puncture my chest as I'm thrown into the air.
>I rag doll around, as bacon tears me apart.

WAR PIGS, FUND IT NOW!

>>32989603
is this some kind of fantasy?

File: piggy2.jpg (130KB, 750x435px) Image search: [Google]

130KB, 750x435px

>>32989623
It wasn't until I came to this thread.

Now I want some goddamn warpigs.

File: a9.jpg (261KB, 1024x711px) Image search: [Google]

261KB, 1024x711px

>>32987550

What if I use this with SAPHE?

>>32987596
>Why would I want to?

Do you want to get eaten? I mean, senselessly killing a bear is stupid, but there comes a point where self-preservation kicks in.

File: kangaroo.gif (2MB, 298x201px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 298x201px

>>32990050
Not for some people.

>>32987596
Why wouldn't I want to?

We share this Earth with all creatures. If I am made to violently rape and kill mother nature then let it come. It's a thing of beauty to be a part of the cycle of life. To be entwined with a beautiful animal's life eternally is to become one with the universe. I will gladly slaughter the charging flesh to begin that transformation. I will open his gut and know that the love I have for this creature is reciprocated and we shall go on my glorious hunting journey as one. My body is nothing more than a vessel for Mother Earth to transfer energy from one life form to another.

>>32989603
>>32989626
they actually existed
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War_pig

hard to find because black sabbath did a song named war pigs and its buried now.

>War pigs are pigs reported to have been used in ancient warfare as a military animal, mostly as a countermeasure against war elephants.
>Historical accounts of incendiary pigs or flaming pigs were recorded
> Antigonus II Gonatas' siege of Megara in 266 BC was broken when the Megarians doused some pigs with combustible pitch, crude oil or resin, set them alight, and drove them towards the enemy's massed war elephants. The elephants bolted in terror from the flaming, squealing pigs, often killing great numbers of their own soldiers by trampling them to death.

LITERALLY FLAME WAR PIGS

>>32989596
black bears are pussies, you can probably fight one hand-to-hand with a knife and win if it's not a very big one

brown bears like grizzlies are generally not timid

>>32987550
Bears aren't really aggressive unless they're hungry or around their young.
Also. 10mm full load will stop anything.

>>32988131
>>32987996
I got almost killed by a hare once, fucker came back to life after I picked it up by the ears and started kicking like a madman shredding my forearm with its nails. Now I give everything a headshot before touching it because fuck being that guy who got killed by a rabbit

>>32987550
Carry a .44 magnum and practice your draw.

File: fucking wolverines mang.jpg (62KB, 1198x674px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 1198x674px

>>32988515
That's pretty much all mustelids, they just wreck shit all day and don't give a fuck

I was attacked by a fucking moose once. Shit was terrifying had to dodge behind trees and slowly work my way away from her calves.

Didn't help that I was hangover...

>>32988679
Maybe drop the 10/22 for a shotgun with a mix of buck and birdshit?

>>32989589
It wouldn't. The dimensions are the same, I mean you can even shoot .22 out of .223 barrels. It also helps that .22 is usually soft as shit and easily malleable

>>32987550
He's cute as fuck.
Would share MRE with him.

File: 436390[1].jpg (158KB, 880x660px) Image search: [Google]

158KB, 880x660px

>>32989455
>>32989589
I don't have my 10/22 with me to check but you might fuck with the extractors if you do it a lot regularly. Once and a while I doubt it would hurt if you don't have to force it shut.

However, a better option if you can find it is the 10/22 short mag that volquartsen made for a while. It still has to manually cycled. Seems to be discontinued though...

>>32987899
No, it's the first of the bear month and he's day drunk on bear beer he bought with his bear welfare.

File: kek~22.jpg (153KB, 537x570px) Image search: [Google]

153KB, 537x570px

>>32990399

>>32987573
kek

>>32987550

>N.nani??

>>32990987
why did this idiotic dad-joke make me laugh

>>32991352
>why did this idiotic dad-joke make me laugh

I'm not sure why I thought of it but it made me giggle so I posted it.

>>32990214
That's pretty fuckin metal right there

>>32987550
won't they mock charge you at first?

>>32989638
>bear sneaks inbetween the two barrels

bear wins every time

>>32990987
>bear welfare.

File: 1415586278359.jpg (543KB, 720x900px) Image search: [Google]

543KB, 720x900px

You've got 30 seconds to explain why you haven't trained to stop a charging bear.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJ7wWtm6dGM

>>32991903
>That pic.
Please tell me it's a trap.

>>32987669
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3qhEIZBlX8

>yes yes let's piss it off
>not just killing it with a gun and getting a nice black bear pelt

I hope she starved on that island t b h

>>32991928
she sounds like some ditzy tourist, probably doesn't even have a gun or know anyone who does.

>>32987550

All these wannabe innawoods operators, OH THEY POSTURE BEFORE THEY CHARGE (except when they don't)

Well as long as you have open ground (never been in the bush have you?)


I lived in AK for 4 years. Spent tons of time in the bush south of Denali, north of talkeetna. You don't see bears in the bush. You might in the tundra or higher elevations where the alder thins out. If a bear wants to munch on you it's going to unless the conditions heavily favor you. Carry bear spray, carry a gun, make noise and hope for the best.

>>32992002
When they charge, they hug the treelines to stay concealed. It's fascinating and terrifying to watch.

File: 1484105453119.jpg (20KB, 306x306px) Image search: [Google]

20KB, 306x306px

>>32987596
>tfw Society is comfy and there's no natural selection so people like this get to thrive and populate the earth to eventually ending up in positions of power above others.

>>32991928
>>32991965
Kinda bummed she doesn't get gored desu

>>32990479
Do grizzlies hunt Moose? I can't imagine a Bull moose vs fully grown grizzler shit would be epic

>jump to the side at the last second
>bear runs into tree or pillar because it cant turn
>shoot his weak spot until he explodes

videogames taught me everything i need to know about wilderness survival

>>32992002

>not wearing an explosive vest at all times just in case

It's like you can't into snackbar f am

>>32988017

Bears are chill. During salmon season they don't give a fuck. It's the ones that are breeding and looking after bambinos that are dangerous.

>>32989455
not really, however if done a lot it could produce a burr in the chamber because the rim of the .22 short case would of course sit farther rearward in the chamber than a .22lr but seeing as it would be brass against hardened steel this would take 100s of thousands of rounds. Essentially it is fine just dont only shoot shorts through an lr for an extended period of time.

>>32988500
I agree with your opinion Anon, multiple hits of .308 FMJ should be able to stop any kind of fluffy cunt...

>Shiting in the woods...
>*trembling bushes*
>Suddenlyhe bear with snout smeared with blueberries staring at you...
>Pfffrrrttt!.mp3
>The bear starts charge
>Grasp your FAL - thumb moves *click*
>RHODESIANS NEVER DIES
>*hysterical screams*
>BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAMBLAMBLAMBLAMBLAM!!!!!
>BLAM! BLAM! BALAM! BLAM!
>BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!
>Quick investigation
>BLAM! BLAM!
>BLAM!

>The bear has been reincarnated as an abortion...

>>32990301
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fatal_bear_attacks_in_North_America
there were more fatal black bear attacks than brown bears in the 2000s
how timid a bear is won't always depend on the colour of their fur. In my experience black bears that live alongside humans, especially yearlings that haven't yet experienced real danger from humans will not be phased by noise or shouting. A smallish 200lb black bear is still strong enough to easily break your neck.

>>32987596
Fuck that. I'd punch that stupid bear to death and send it to bear hell. Mother nature doesn't decide who wins and who loses. Mother nature didn't choose the fight, the bear did.

related

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9O9ZO7vCOA4&index=60&list=LL2eqlPIuKNtif_z1B9OMlMA

>>32987550
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!!! And it isn't even charging, that's basically what a jogging bear looks like. X(

>>32992508
That probably has a lot to do with bear habitats too, I'm pulling this completely out of my arse but I'd guess there's a lot more black bears close to civilization when you usually have to be way out in the wilderness to run into a grizzly

>>32987899
It hilarious without the sound.

>>32988131
Please tell otter story. I saw one once in the okeefenokee and it reminded me of a long dog.

>>32987561
He dindu nuffin. He got straight A's in salmonology.

>>32987645
It's not good that that bear isn't more afraid of humans.

>>32988428
A guy I knew who was in the army said a bear wandered into their camp and they unloaded on it but it took a while to die. He also had a story about how wolverines will play dead. They thought they killed one and a guy had it in a sack that was slung over his shoulder. It woke up and bit his spine. They killed it but they still couldn't get it off so it had to be surgically removed.

>>32988017
Gotta lay off the weed anon.
t. a fellow pothead.

>>32987569
Kek

File: 1481694480249.gif (2MB, 320x240px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 320x240px

>>32987596
Never change, /an/. Never change.

>>32992622
>I'd punch that stupid bear to death

Nobody's this retarded, right?

>>32987550
Christ I hate Ole Ephraim. Him and his niggur cousin Ol Slewfoot.

>>32989122
Home defense

File: ThisKillsTheFisher.jpg (34KB, 470x353px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 470x353px

>>32988679
>>32989534
Trapping is pretty common way to deal with these animals. Pic related is kind of similar to ones my father tends to use.

>>32992897
I'm not retarded I'm just really badass. I don't think YOU should try that but I absolutely can take a bear in unarmed combat.

>>32988131
>animal control had a suppressed 10/22

Anon you hired a hitman, not an exterminator.

>>32989534
It's almost like they should make specialized traps for every type of fur bearing mammal on the continent.

Oh wait, they fucking do!
Belisle #120 in a bucket set kills em good, and winter pelts are worth a good chunk a change too. You learned something today urbanfag.

>>32989596
Cats are just secretly badass. I've read more than few stories of cats chasing bears the fuck away from their property.

>>32989536
kek, quality video, thanks for that anon

>>32989603
>hunting boar with a bow
it's like you're asking to die

A Mossberg Cruiser or a double-action .44 would do the trick just fine.

>>32987550
>charging_bear.webm
more like "bear nope-ing the fuck outta there.webm"
he fucken done with your shit, just went full grab-sks-go-innawoods. prolly wont be seeing him for a long ass time

>>32991903
>You've got 30 seconds to explain why you haven't trained to stop a charging bear.
Cuz bear dont charge.
Unless you literally step onto their kiddies, in which case you probably deserve getting mauled.

File: trapholes.jpg (29KB, 286x428px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 286x428px

>>32991920
That bunnygirl is about to get some hot bear-dick.

>>32987924

They're the symbol of America's most badass president for a reason. Teddy never died, a Valkyrie showed up and took him home to Valhalla.

And to think had great grandparents that had a "pet" bear on their homestead cattle ranch in Eastern Oregon. Even have a tin type photo of the family posing on the house porch with this fucking waist high bear just chilling next to my great grandfather.

>>32989122

They might be useful in a jack of all trades manner, sure there are animals that are better suited for each role but why not have just one that does all of them good enough?

>>32992040

I never really saw that. Both time I ran into them the just casually walked out the bush about 10 feet from me. Couldn't see a damn thing the alder was so thick then bam this 600 brown bear strolls through like it's grass. Looks at me and keeps walking.

They are just so damn strong.

File: 1416520439612.gif (2MB, 282x158px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 282x158px

Forget Bears, its dang ol' Hippos ya gota worry about

File: the only government you can trust.jpg (27KB, 673x135px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 673x135px

>>32988490
>45-70

>>32993637
disgusting

>>32988399
Isn't this /k/?

>>32989455
Just get some .22lr subsonics. I have shot some, (CCI, maybe) that were really quite and required manual cycling of the bolt.

File: S5780.jpg (147KB, 1800x1800px) Image search: [Google]

147KB, 1800x1800px

>>32988845
We have these fuckers in the south of France too.
My dad is raising chickens and pigeons. One of them tried to grab the goods one night, and I remember my dad catching him with a glorified rat trap. they look smart, but in the end they are just rodents.
Also, the sound it made when trapped was terrifying.

>>32992780
i kek'ed

>>32987550
slower than a doggo

>>32987682
>Source: Hunted moose, bear, ur mum

Mums are best sexed to exhaustion. I bring Tyrone for that work.

>>32992508
>A smallish 200lb black bear is still strong enough to easily break your neck.
a smallish 200lbs human is strong enough to do the same. he can also kill you in a hundred other ways including shooting you in the back.
being dangerous is very relative. bears are slightly more dangerous than say dogs.

>>32992780
kek

>>32989122
Tactical bear pack

>>32987596
>natural selection at it's finest

still kek'd though

>>32987550
try to run downhill, bears hind legs are taller than the front so they cant run fast down hills without tumbling end over end

>>32987720
I fucking keked hard when I saw this.

>>32994287
>Taking a walk innawoods
>Hear rustling in the bushes in front of me as I crest a hill
>beeholepucker.gif
>see massive ass bear start booking it after me
>turn to run down hill because something i saw on /k/
>all of a sudden i see a brown ball-shaped blurr tumbling end over end past me
>somehow the bear is now in front of me

That'll be the last time I listen to survival tips from /k/

>>32994287
Yes because a bear fucking summersaulting at you like that stone ball from indiana jones is much better

File: nootnoot motherfucker.gif (305KB, 261x199px) Image search: [Google]

305KB, 261x199px

>>32988679
>>32988690
yeah nah fuck that why are these allowed to exist

File: SteyrM95_in_profile.jpg (11KB, 600x195px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 600x195px

>>32987550
No but my rifle does.

>>32988428
10mm +p extreme penetrator my dude. It'l bring down attack helicopters. Bears are easy shit with it.

>>32988131
>otter
>kill on sight
The fuck?

File: Spray Ritsuko.jpg (74KB, 551x645px) Image search: [Google]

74KB, 551x645px

>>32988131
>I would just grab the fucking thing and chuck it

You don't chuck the woodchuck, it chucks you.
Blockhead.

>>32995322
why did you post this

>>32987659
hitting a moose with your car does more damage to your car and moose walks away, if that doesn't show you there power idk what does

>>32992897
Come on, don't you want to be the third person known to have killed a grizzly with your bear (hue) hands? Or do you want to be known as the guy who was a giant faggot and wouldn't fist fight a bear?

>>32988679

That's some fucking Jurassic Park shit

>>32987596
>this guy doesn't know how bears eat you
If you're a woman they start eating you from your pelvis/vagina first then eating your legs. If you're a man they just start with the legs.

They fuck you up pretty good, then start eating your legs while you're still alive, if you're lucky you bleed out, or you try to fight and piss it off enough so it goes for your head/throat and kills you faster.

Being eaten by a bear is a horrible fucking way to go, they don't try to go for your spine/windpipe first like big cats do and kill you first. Bears would rather you bleed all over your freshly flayed flesh as you marinade their meal with your agony.

I wouldn't shoot one unless it came at me, but fuck going out that way. You're a lunatic

>>32988617
>filename
>not invading ukraine
One fucking job

>>32996478
>they start eating you from your pelvis/vagina

y tho?

>>32991903
FAKE

>>32993166
I used to work on a golf course and we had a suppressed Remington 700 in 30-06 for culling deer

File: elefant charge.gif (3MB, 565x318px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 565x318px

>>32993637
>File: 1416520439612.gif (1.9 MB, 282x158)

>that blood jet shooting from it's nose

I feel bad for it... what gun is that? is 4570 enough for hippo?

>>32992362
.22 head spaces on the rim, so the rim is always in the same spot.

>>32987596
BEAR FUCKER?! DO YOU NEED ASSISTANCE?!

File: 1485077320589.jpg (17KB, 208x208px) Image search: [Google]

17KB, 208x208px

>>32987550
10MM STRONK

>>32987659
Outsider detected. I live in Alaska near the kenai and brownies will absolutely fuck your shit up. Moose at least have the decency to stomp you to death. Bears will eat you alive for days.

>>32988528
this is literally how the guy who domesticated dogs thought. fortune favors the bold, get on it dude.

>>32996987
>this is literally how the guy who domesticated dogs thought. fortune favors the bold, get on it dude.

dogs are pack animals, bears are solitary and hate company for the most part of year. not saying it can't be done but it would have been exceedingly difficult. more interesting is this:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kostroma_Moose_Farm

>>32992002
>4yrs
Step up tourist bitch

>>32992121
A big source of food for brownies here on the peninsula is moose calves. Cows start calving right about when the bears wake up during breakup. Another big source is young bear cubs. Bears eat anything they take a fancy too. Brown bears will most likely not eat you but they will fuck you up/kill you. Black bears will eat the shit out of you. Won't even
Bother to kill you first

>>32993202
This

>>32996978
>I live in Alaska near the kenai and brownies will absolutely fuck your shit up.
I live in Southeast and I didn't get that post at all either. We had 2 people fucked up last year, both had bear spray, and when they catch you they just start eating you alive. Then they bury you and turn your left over body parts into carrion.

>>32996546
Soft, calorically dense, access to viscera. Just not worth the energy to kill you.

>>32997312
For the record, it's always been that way. We've found dinosaurs with allosaurus bite marks centered around the pelvis and hips

>>32987645
I like to think that the bear in that webm was an outcast that never quite fit in only because he never tried talking to the other bears even though they didn't think he was as weird as he thought himself. That human gave him a pep-talk and now he's off to go make friends for the first time in his life.

File: 458 Fuck You.jpg (144KB, 1024x768px) Image search: [Google]

144KB, 1024x768px

>>32987550
What is .458 SOCOM?
A 16" AR with 45-70 power and 10+1 rounds on tap = one hell of a modern brush gun.
Fuck you Yogi, eat a dick you ursine fuck

File: autist burr.jpg (95KB, 622x447px) Image search: [Google]

95KB, 622x447px

>>32997440
Bernd bear?

>>32987550
What is this?!?!?! *do front flip while unsheathing my twin no-dachi katanas Demonbane and Death Reaper* You want gentle?! I'll give you gentle!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *bring down Demonbane on gaijin bear's head and begin slicing* TAKE THIIIIIIIIS!!!! *do a cartwheel and stab the baka bear with Death Reaper* AND THIIIIIIIIIIS!!!! *do a backflip while slicing all over. body falls apart* heh, thanks, I needed to test this sharpness for a while now. nothing personel

>>32997264
Spotted a fellow Alaskan. I don't go anywhere in the woods without either slugs or a .45-70. Way to easy to run into one.

>>32997447
.458 Socom makes my pee-pee tingle.

>>32987645

>That subtle movement towards his shotgun

File: image.jpg (2MB, 4032x3024px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 4032x3024px

>>32997264
For you Alaskabro.
>ppl need to learn how to fucking drive.
But I am grateful for the meat

File: index.jpg (12KB, 303x166px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 303x166px

>>32997264

>>32998119
They always go for the thighs

File: Backcountry.png (676KB, 978x551px) Image search: [Google]

676KB, 978x551px

why are all bear themed movie utter trash?

>>32997447
>with .45-70 power
Is this a new meme? Tell me you arnt truly this fucking stupid anon

File: Marlin 1895 SBL Kal.45-70 Gov..jpg (12KB, 750x500px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 750x500px

>>32998193
Europoor here. Thinking about getting pic related for HD. Would cost me 1800€. Good idea or overkill?

File: index.jpg (82KB, 911x500px) Image search: [Google]

82KB, 911x500px

>>32998119
>>32998170
https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/2bnark/this_is_why_you_dont_mess_around_with_a_baby_bear/

File: Tightest Shit Double D.png (248KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

248KB, 500x375px

>>32998193
Look up the specs dumbfuck.
45-70 vs 458 SOCOM out of 16in barrels have nearly identical performance. 45-70 gains more velocity from longer barrels where as 458 tops out at the 16 inch mark, but in a brush gun/carbine length 458 is pound for pound the same as 45-70.
You shit eating twat.

File: Winchester 1886.jpg (35KB, 640x427px) Image search: [Google]

35KB, 640x427px

>>32998225
That's gayer than eight guys blowing nine guys.
Lever guns should be blued or case hardened not stainless, and they should have hardwood not laminate.
Rails are VERBOTEN!
Case colored, octagonal barrels, bluing, and walnut. Those are what lever guns are made of.

File: 800px-.45-70vs.308.svg.png (24KB, 800x300px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 800x300px

>>32998337
>That's gayer than eight guys blowing nine guys. Lever guns should be blued or case hardened not stainless, and they should have hardwood not laminate.

No, it's a practical innawoods gun. I wished they made AKs in stainless you don't have to give a fuck.

>Those are what lever guns are made of.
FUDD you!

File: maxresdefault.jpg (146KB, 1428x950px) Image search: [Google]

146KB, 1428x950px

>>32998225

>>32987550

could 55 grain 5.56 projectiles kill a bear from a 16 inch barrel

>>32987669
Actually if you do a bit of googling that woman is slightly badass. She might be a hippie, but she does artic mushes and 200 mile canoe trips. Kinda conflicted desu.

File: Unbenannt.jpg (119KB, 925x333px) Image search: [Google]

119KB, 925x333px

>>32998465
she has a cute voice, gave me boner.

>>32998408

just look at his face holy shit


this thread has convinced me i need a bigger gun

File: Bighorn Armory Model 89 Rifle.jpg (42KB, 640x240px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 640x240px

>>32998362
You're the fag who want's a Fudd gun, it's not the Fudd's fault for telling you what's what.
You have to remember that you basically asked about buying a classic muscle car and replacing the guts with modern euro-cuck micro cylinder diesel shit. Lever actions come with a lot of baggage because of their history in the US. That said, stainless lever guns with laminate do look wrong...
Maybe if they did them in nitride and polymer?

Pic related: Baddest lever gun in existence.

File: bayeoux shinji ikari.png (993KB, 666x550px) Image search: [Google]

993KB, 666x550px

>>32998513
>You're the fag who want's a Fudd gun, it's not the Fudd's fault for telling you what's what.

I'm a fag who's restricted in what he can own by his government. There is a difference.

>You have to remember that you basically asked about buying a classic muscle car and replacing the guts with modern euro-cuck micro cylinder diesel shit. Lever actions come with a lot of baggage because of their history in the US. That said, stainless lever guns with laminate do look wrong...

That's your opinion. I'd prefer having a reliable gun that's as easy as possible to maintain. I don't need case hardened shit steel that'S half as strong as modern stainless just to please my autism.

File: 029.jpg (305KB, 1061x1886px) Image search: [Google]

305KB, 1061x1886px

>>32998510
>>32998510
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1229998/The-horrifying-moment-bear-mauls-man-climbed-zoo-enclosure.html

>That allowed worried park officials time to call police. They arrived, armed with 9mm 'fragmentation' ammunition which splinters on impact, just seconds before the man jumped down into the danger zone.

>>32998225
Weird gun for hd. Great gun for hunting

Well if you're dead set on a new lever gun I would avoid Marlin. Since they were bought by Freedom Group their quality has plummeted.
If you can find an older one with the "JM" stamp go for it, but otherwise check out other manufacturers.

Some people have claimed that the new "Remlins" are ok, but I don't trust shit from Freedom Group.

File: _83864483_pa_taylor.jpg (69KB, 976x549px) Image search: [Google]

69KB, 976x549px

>>32998732
>Weird gun for hd. Great gun for hunting
pump action 12ga are banned because some douche robbed banks with them 35 years ago. otherwise I'd take that obviously.

File: 17-Taylor-swift.w1200.h630.jpg (190KB, 1200x630px) Image search: [Google]

190KB, 1200x630px

>>32998768
>>32998768
is it safe to carry it 6+1 cocked and locked?

File: 1479566527001.jpg (563KB, 900x1267px) Image search: [Google]

563KB, 900x1267px

>>32998820
>>32998778

File: 1485136255677.jpg (481KB, 2293x3000px) Image search: [Google]

481KB, 2293x3000px

>>32998930
>>32998820
>>32998778
>you will never have passionate sex with Tay while she stares deep into your eyes as you both reach climax
Why. Fucking. Live.

File: 1484547184001.jpg (185KB, 1335x1000px) Image search: [Google]

185KB, 1335x1000px

>>32998963

File: 1479563153066.jpg (641KB, 1208x1920px) Image search: [Google]

641KB, 1208x1920px

>>32998963
>wanting to have relations with a coalburner

>>32999238
where's the proof

File: 1476904874001.gif (2MB, 270x378px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 270x378px

>>32999326
>2017
>white girl
>not having sucked BBC

File: 1483481718008.jpg (49KB, 640x640px) Image search: [Google]

49KB, 640x640px

>bear thread turns into taytay thread

I'm not too mad over this

>>32989122
>need
SHALL

>>32988017
Get a fat girlfriend, pretty much the same thing.

>>32998119
Atleast he still has his dick

>>32999354
>t. cuckold fetishist

File: farage laughing.jpg (49KB, 462x347px) Image search: [Google]

49KB, 462x347px

>>32999238
>have relations

File: 54bbfb158e53a_-_hbz-taylor-swift-hair-2006-xl.jpg (71KB, 480x720px) Image search: [Google]

71KB, 480x720px

>>33000315
how do you call it?

File: 980x.jpg (93KB, 600x700px) Image search: [Google]

93KB, 600x700px

>>33000295
>t. cuckold fetishist

the exact opposite actually, as fas as I'm concerned, she gets her own tattoo and off to the camp with her....

>>32988547
they did it with foxes.

>>32987569
F-for you

>>32996720
458 express, maybe even 700 express

>>32987899
You actually have to think about that, it took a shot and still kept charging.

>>32989536
>Getting a guard pig jacked up on Pepsi.
>No complaints.

I suddenly miss the 1980s.

>>33000773
>I suddenly miss the 1980s.
why suddenly? at least back then there still was hope.

>>32987596

Your brain is an incredibly unique and complicated assembly of information. When your brain is destroyed, all of your memories, your consciousness, all that makes you "you," it's all gone. Forever. Turned into mush in a bear's stomach, scattered across the forest floor. Disassembled. Scattered. De-cohered. Like a whole galaxy, smeared into mush on a shit-colored canvas.

Some atoms that used to be you will turn into bear shit. If that's enough for you, then go for it my dude. Me, I'll take the 10mm Glock and keep an eye out for grizzlies.

File: 1273048414236.jpg (47KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

47KB, 640x480px

>>32996942
MFW I GOT THE REFERENCE

TOP KEK

File: teach-bear-lessons.jpg (260KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

260KB, 1920x1080px

>>32992508
>guy want's to pet 400 lbs bear
>bear bites his arm
>guy proceeds to manhandle the thing and beat the crap out of it
>police try to catch him for animal abuse
>he escapes
>find him in a hospital with stitches in his arm

File: taytay.jpg (111KB, 634x523px) Image search: [Google]

111KB, 634x523px

>>32999354
>All white girls have sucked BBC
>Omg Taylor took a couple pics with black musicians she's been BLACKED

/pol/ should be fucking deleted

>>32998119
Omg did he keep his leg?!?

>>32998454
A .22 can kill a bear, it's all about shot placement.

File: IMG_20151021_124432.jpg (722KB, 2560x1920px) Image search: [Google]

722KB, 2560x1920px

>>32998778
so buy a pistol or semi auto rifle for hd

File: bear tax.jpg (121KB, 1317x903px) Image search: [Google]

121KB, 1317x903px

>implying he'll get past the bear patrol

>>32998561

Don't listen to that hillbilly. Personally I'd get it in .357 if it's just for home defense.

>>33001321

>taking shit posting seriously
>Not knowing she really has dated niggers either way

Wooohooo looky here boys, we got ourselves a /leftypol/

>>32988478
people who name stuff stupidly should be fed to brown black bears

>>32987596
And above your tomb the stars will belong to us.

>>32988500
If some guy in Alaska wasted a bear with an AK-74, then any FAL/HK91/M1A etc. will do you solid

>>32987720
>>32987779

Holy kek, at first I just thought that he was just the world's most awkward and clumsy bear ever.

don't shoot bears they are just trying to be friendly

>>32988017
>oh hey mr. bear have a fish i caought in your stream!", bear chills and hangs out "this my human now."

Lay off the faggot-tier facebook memes

>>32994636
Are you the shitter on gunbroker who outbid me on his own gun

>>32988017
In Ontario over 10 years ago they'd run away from you if they saw you. Now? They'll attack you straight up.

The reason? The bear population has increased quite drastically on the whole, as such bears had been showing up in towns and neighborhoods in Northern Ontario (and increasingly in Southern Ontario).

When this happens (in order to please animal lovers/environmentalists) they tranquillize the bear and air lift it back into nature. Unfortunately they are dropping these bears off into other bear's territory. They don't like to share this territory and as such bears have been fighting each other over the territory more frequently. Even very young bears are getting into a fair amount of fights. To the point where they are walking away with a lot of battle scars.

As such their instinctive reaction to running into other animals and even humans now is to fight, rather than flee. As such I know someone who lives up in Northern Ontario and he will not go out into the woods anymore without a shotgun. No exceptions.

>>32988679
>>32988690
Lost a cat to a Fishercat a few years back in the fall, didn't discover the body until the following spring. Wasn't consumed or anything, just killed and left to rot.

>>33001211
oh and he got a $100 fine for animal cruelty for beating a bear twice his size let's not forget that!

>>33004426
at least the cat had a chance. around here weasels com to the city hide in cars chew up cables and stuff, cats have a constant turf war with them. not many casualties on either side.

>>33004781
or martens i can never tell them weasel likes apart. but they are about the size of smaller cats, the fishercats appear to be a bit bigger tho.

>>32998963
>Passionate sex
Five seconds of googling will burst your bubble. Her previous lovers have been quoted stating that she was terrible in bed, just laid there and did nothing, and eventually not even wanting sex, just kiss.

>>33002709
Not necessarily
The 5.45x39 of the AK-74 has actually a better wounding potential

>>32987596
Deirdre pls

>>32987669
>not shooting it

If I lived up there anything threatening my property would be dispatched with great prejudice. Dump a magazine out of the M14 into it and put its head on a pike as a warning to those that follow. The rest goes in the fridge. Bear meat is decent eats.

Could hard-cast 45LC drop a bear?

>>32987669
Honestly I'd open up with bottle rockets and roman candles to scare it off before moving onto a rifle or something. Something about shooting fireworks at an invasive bear tickles my funny bone.
>It's the end of September! Why are you here?! You're supposed to be asleep!

>Be me
>Innawoods NH
>Young nogunz
>Taking my kayak out to the pond so I can pick blueberries on the shoreline
>Go over a steep part of the path
>Face to face with a black bear
>Freeze
>It looks at me, then fucks off
>I wait a while
>I fuck off too

Black bears are probably the chillest bears.

File: ClarifyPls.png (962KB, 972x899px) Image search: [Google]

962KB, 972x899px

>>32987669
Holy fuck, it's just a kayak, lady.

>>32991965
see
>>32998465

File: image.jpg (38KB, 447x447px) Image search: [Google]

38KB, 447x447px

>>32987596
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=g9lCkFygaaQ
Perhaps this will help change your ways dear sir

File: NiggaWhat.jpg (80KB, 973x525px) Image search: [Google]

80KB, 973x525px

>>33007988
Jesus.

>>32987993
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=40x89Q2o5Xw
Moose is on the loose

>>33007988
Did he died?

File: bear attack.gif (2MB, 618x355px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 618x355px

>>32987596
Have fun with that bro

File: 1473693059746.jpg (10KB, 224x225px) Image search: [Google]

10KB, 224x225px

>>32987720
>tfw I realize he was dying there and not just super clumsy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nU5cMZymSr0

Obligatory video.

GO AWAY BEAR. GO AWAY.

>>32988528
Yeah, bring one into your home and get back to us with the results

>>32989596
>Black bear

File: image.jpg (61KB, 500x403px) Image search: [Google]

61KB, 500x403px

>>33008133
Yes. He died giving birth to a beautiful baby cub. Never put the pheromones on during mating season niggas

>>33008133
Nah, he just took an advil and walked it off.

>>33005023
I would agree with you if we were talking about people. With a bear, I'm not sure. If you're shooting a bear with its head facing you then theoretically the .308s will go further through. Especially if it comes to thick bones

>>32987596
what a cuck

Over the years I've been attacked by a family of rabid bobcats, a pitbull, a shark, a small mother black bear, and a gang of black people. I managed to survive all of those without ever being armed. I wrestled, fought hard and never gave up. I like my chances against anything short of a rabid gorrila. grizzly bear? I could handle it.

>>32994287
>>32994413
GOTTA GO FAST

>>32989122
I wonder what the first domesticators of cats were thinking

>>33008388
That is pretty much how it works tbqh
https://youtu.be/RI_f0buRi2c

>>32988017
>why cant all bears just be chill af like this....
because they get shot if they are
>if they weren't such ass holes more than half the time.
they try to avoid humans most of the time