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My military story

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>Turn 18
> Talk to Marine Corps recruiter
>Become interested
>Head to Marine recruiting office
>Navy recruiter talks to me
>Ditch the Marine Corps
>Navy recruiter promises me a trip to buds
>I drop out in the swimming because I don't like the cold water
>Now I'm scrubbing the ship all day
>Fuck
>>
Enjoy your four years!

>Laughing in DD-214
>>
better than mine
>go to boot camp for marines
>get sick, nothing too bad
>but I start losing weight, even when i get put on double rats
>weight won't stop dropping
>dangerously underweight now
>after a weight eval (for double rat fags) get sent to "the second floor"
>talk to a psychiatrist
>mfw they thought I was trying to kill myself by starvation
>mfw this got me DQ'd and sent home
just fuck my future up
>>
Requirements for Marine Corps grunts
>Asvab score of 35-70
>Be skinny
>Be able to run at least a 20 minute 5k
>23 pull ups
>And talk shit to every special force unit outside of the corps
>>
>>32973171
>take asvab cause why not
>nothing too difficult
>get result
>91
The first to contact me was the air force
>>
>>32973101
They made you eat rats? Marines really do get the short end of the stick.
>>
>>32973699
rats are short for rations
>>
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>>32973770
>>
>>32973699
No, airborne eats rats...
>>
>>32973055
>Joining muhreens.
>Joining navy.

Should have been a real man and joined the army or a smart lazy ass and joined the chairforce.
>>
>>32973055
>taking up a BUD/S slot knowing you're a useless fuck in the water
>it could have gone to a better candidate

Neck yourself, cunt.
>>
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>inna basic
>army
>"confidence day" bullshit
>literally all we do is clime a giant wooden jungle gym
>someone comes up the top of the 50 foot tower
>gets a poor grip on the top platform, just as they're over
>slips off due to the georgia humidity
>plummets all 50 feet
>misses the mat
>smashed his left knee into a million pieces
dude had his military career set and everything with how squared away he was and how well his contract was set up
>>
>>32973939
He would have to be joking, those guys get screened and then trained pretty hard before they get sent to BUD/S. If you fail out you still don't get a job in the navy that's THAT shitty.
>>
>>32973957
And now he's getting $3194.27 a month for the rest of his life (with between a 1.5% and 3% increase per year depending on inflation) without having to do anything or having any restrictions on actual jobs he can work.
>>
>>32973055
>Sign up as 18x
>Qualify expert and 280+ pt score
>Do all 3 weeks of jumpschool
>Break my shit on 4th jump
>Go on con leave, get promised to do last jump
>First week back, they give me orders
>Never been able to go back to airborne school or go to bragg, never seen my friends since

No one's word is as good as gold
>>
>>32973278
For what?
>>
>>32973939
>32973939
Dude, the water was like 40F
>>
>>32973983
Can confirm. Currently in the pipeline. It takes most guys 6-12 months of straight PSTing before they even get SO contracts that secure their placement in BUD/s ( granted they pass every upcoming PST while in the Great Lakes and prep ). You aren't getting an SO contract in 2017 without having great athleticism all around.
>>
>>32973899
Arr, filthy landlubber!
>>
>>32974052
Is MFF still part of the pipeline or is it just Army Jump School for non-JSOC teams?
>>
>>32973055
Sweepers sweepers man your stations
>>
The Coast Gaurd is the best branch hands down.
>>
>>32974126
I have no idea man. I believe it's MFF now and Army jump school is out of the SO pipeline. I'm not far enough in the pipeline to really know yet.
>>
>>32973171
Marines require a 37, you're stuck with army if you get a 35 or 36.

Also bottom of the barrel dudes (anyone in the 30s, occasional 40s) are going to end up mopping floor and cooking unless they do excellent at infantryman tasks. You can go infantry if you score higher than a 70, but your recruiter is going to hate you and your DS isn't going to encourage you to stick to infantry.
>>
Currently a 15E in AIT at ft. Huachuca Arizona.
It's pretty sweet, I went to fort Sill for basic. Went from October to January, cold as all hell.
Ama I guess, but generally anyone can do it. We had litteraly retarded people in basic.
Hooah Army.
>>
>>32974409
what the fuck is even out there at Huachuca?
>>
>>32974023
and if you looked into coronado ahead of time you'd realize it's on THE PACIFIC FUCKING OCEAN
>>
>>32974430
Lol nothing. Were split from Mexico by the mountains and border patrol. We're an hour from a junkyard city called Sierra Vista. You've got your Walmart, tattoo parlor and vape stop right off post. On post you've got sweet hiking/biking trails, paintball, ranges, bowling alley, cool shit you don't even know.
But we're in the middle of buttfuck nowhere border of mexico.
If the bill passes we might be first put on "Build the wall" detail.
>>
>>32974563
sounds like the majority of military bases in Arizona except for Luke.
>>
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>>32974409

You're not a 15E yet, boot. Fucking AIT babies. Also, Sierra Vista is a nice town and it's not an hour away. The fact that you think it is indicates that you're probably black phase.
>>
>>32974600
Pretty much. It's not bad here, our post is mostly comprised of Aviation and MI.
Remember the news of the shadow that left Arizona and ended up in Colorado? Yeah.... About that...
>>
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>>
>Be fatty. 240
>Go to join navy
>Marine recruiter starts stalking me.
>Navy says basic, maybe twice
>Marine corps says basic once and well make a man out of you.
>Tell petty officer corps is trying to poach me when he's not around.
>Navy tells me I might be better off in Marines
That's when I noped the fuck out.

Fucking lazy ass petty officer filled his damn quota and decided to give me to the marines.

Best thing that ever happened though. Went back to school and got a good job.
>>
>>32974563
You forgot drones and horseback riding.
>>
>>32974876
Hell yeah. As a 15E I can't say I get to fly them though.
You've got your angry lawnmower shadow, and a pred- I mean grey eagle.
>>
>be 18
>go to join Muhreens
>meet recruiter
>as soon as I walk in he says I'm cute
>I'm a guy
>do a 180 out of the room
>as I'm walking out he's telling me to come back
>never come back
>go to college
>graduate
>still want military experience
>>
>>32975001

There's gays in the military, too.

And just a lot of homo-eroticism.
>>
>>32974988
I was there for a min as a kid. Stepdad was in the drone program.

Other than Pima and having a pool it sucked. And horseback riding, that was cool.
>>
>be 21
>awkward as fuck and some kind of autism probably
>directionless in life
>directionless best friend who is even more awkward and even more autistic than me joins navy
>i cant because chronic illness
>directionless friend is now successful person with wife and lost contact years ago
>im still where i was
>its been 12 years

why dont they have a military for us defects? ;_; Id be happy scrubbing a boat all day! I like boats!
>>
>>32975001
>have a perfect opportunity to get fucked by a marine
>don't take it
faggot
>>
>>32974287
How fucking stupid do you have to be to score that low? I'm not the brightest bulb in the knife drawer and I got an 82
>>
>Be 30
>Both younger brothers went in
>Breaking my balls in skilled labor
>Should have joined in my teens
>Fuck
>>
>>32973278
Air Force career is best career. If want to suffer then choose elsewhere. Yungmen with dreams of glory are gonna get those dreams crushed. Enjoy technology instead or go medical for maximum civilian monies afterwards.
>>
>>32974253
Likely so. Air Force is best branch with a reasonable number of open manning slots. Coasties are a happy bunch so they don't switch services. Others have buyers remorse then go Air Force.
>>
>>32975091
don't worry anon, they let women into the combat arms, and allow gayz and TGs to serve openly, a few more years and it will be just like any other federal job. you ever go down to the Social Security administration, or any other .gov office? It's a freak show, every race, fatties, blind, the deaf, people in wheelchairs, and a few token retards. And they all have these big grins on their faces, because they lucked into their union gov job because of a quota. You can be the guy that sweeps up the oil spots in the motor pool, and cuts the grass around BN HQ. You won't even have to deploy, or go to the field. You'll stay behind with the broke dicks, and chapter cases and pull phone watch. You can atleast answer a phone and stammer out the greatting of the day and take a message from some pissed off SgtMaj, right?
>>
>>32975098
The score is percentile, an 82 means your score was better than 82% of the other scores that round.

A 35 means that you scored better than 35% of testers that round. Your actual test scores might be very close depending on how normalized the bell curve is.
>>
>>32974409
Wait do you know my cousin Rattie?
>>
>>32973899
>chairforce
okay, ill remember that when you call for help when u come under fire from goat farmers
>>
>>32975295
Last name rattie? Can't say I do.
>>
>>32973055
>Joining military for reasons
>Figure I'll take the easy way out
>Goto Air Force recruiters
>Literally off today to get new chairs
>What the fuck
>Navy calls me in
>Sounds good, lets do it
>9/11 happens in A school
>Spend my enlistment with Marine Corps
>Love it
>Go back to blue side
>Hate it
>Demand to go back to green side
>No
>Get fat
>Get out
>>
>>32975358
>>32975358
ah alright.He just graduated AIT there I think.Just wanted to know if you knew him or anything
>>
>be 16
>be 260 lb.
>Marines recruiting during lunch at high school
>one day decide to have a chat with them
>talk about whatever, didn't know much about guns back then
>eventually they do the thing where they're obligated to give me the sign up info
>give them my phone and email address
>they say that they'll put it in the system and when I'm 18 I'll be notified
>I'm 20 now and have never received an email from any branch of the military ever
>they probably threw my form away the second I turned my back to them
I'm real directionless, I'm unemployed and nothing strikes my interest, guns are one of the few things I find fascinating. I've been thinking of getting /fit/ and taking the Asvab but just about every post on /k/ conveys that military life sucks
>>
>>32974012
this is my worst nightmare
>>
>>32975429


Do it. You're lacking in other options.
>>
>>32973995
yea, but he's still got a fucked knee
>>
>>32973055
>>32973055
>>32973055
Was buds really how it was portrayed in that youtube documentary?
>>
>>32974012
How easy is it to fuck your shit up on parachute jumps? I feel like I'd sperg out and snap my shit.
>>
>>32976369
It's 99% mental and 1% physical. That's of corse if you are in excellent health and shape.
>>
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>be in boot camp
>mostly mind games, standing in the cold and running around
>stay under the radar most of the time, graduate
>was total boot during boot leave, 21 days of RA is gay because recruiter is a motivator
> show up to SOI, MCT is just like boot camp but with more hiking and IM UP HE SEES ME IM DOWN
>graduate, hop on a shuttle to MOS school, pissed off corporal spends the first 20 minutes of us being there talking shit
>finally pick up a class, was open contract so had no idea what an AAV was
>next 2 months or so consisted of getting hazed by Fallujah and Ramadi vets
>most were getting kicked out so they treated it like a get together at our expense
>graduate, get to the fleet and get hazed some more, lots of PT
>start work ups for a MEU, go to 29 palms to fill sandbags and dig amtrac graves, hunter leggett to freeze my nuts off and be innaship for a couple weeks
>finally get underway, what ensues is a plethora of shenanigans and close calls on foreign ports involving alcohol, drunk europeans and sluts/hookers
>get to kuwait and sit at the Iraqi border to get buried in sand and watch real Marines go and kick ass
>come back and get put into an armory, rot there for the rest of my enlistment
>continue to drink heavily and get into hairy situations with my bros till I get out

Now I'm a NEET waiting to go to school so I can use that GIbux to buy more guns, it was a good time really, I miss my friends the most really
>>
>>32975001
He probably did you a favor, all the cute recruits and marines got fucked with a lot.

I tell you what though if you got /fit/ and go to towns that dont normally have Marines you'd drown in pussy.

Or you'll marry the first piece of ass that gives you attention and go through a brutal divorce after your first deployment.

This is /k/ after all
>>
>>32975093
lima oscar lima
>>
>>32975098
>>32975281
Ex gf got a 4. Buddy was her recruiter. Confronted me next time I was over, kindly informed me I was dating a rock, not a human.
>>
>>32973055
My military history
>become 19
>get german passport in exchange of roach passport
>nothing better to do
>go to Bundedwehr
>9 months in east germany amongst nazis

well at least I was a tanker and on a training ground so we would be on the tank pretty often. was a shit work to clean the Leo 2
>>
>>32974012
See this shit I am not with
Honestly I would never want to jump out of fucking airplanes, not because it's crazy high up, but just because one mistake can fuck your entire body up forever

f that dude
>>
>>32974012
This is my nightmare

Godspeed bro
>>
>>32975429
It's better than your mom's basement.

But be smart. Get all the schooling they offer and use your time wisely. You'll come out better for it. Also unless you want to go into a profession that involves combat STAY AWAY FROM THE INFANTRY!!!
>>
>>32973101
Suicide through starvation... is that actually a thing? What a miserable self-torturing way to kill yourself.
I actually gained 10 pounds in boot camp. I don't know how I managed to do that.
>>
>>32976494
Knees and feet together when you land, just practice a good plf technique.
>>
Is this every fag in /meg/?
All those retards think they can get into special forces.
>>
>>32977065
>Ex gf got a 4
I went to a Catholic HS inside of a major US city. I actually lived out in the suburbs. The recruiting station that had my school also had several other schools inside the city limits, or in smaller communities completely surrounded by the city. The recruiters were telling me about kids getting single digit scores, but I went and took it and got a 92 and a 124 GT. Had a recruiter in the station I never even talked to congratulate me on my score.
>go to MEPS for physical
>get done, think I will have a huge list of jobs
>well Anon, you are blue/green color blind so you get 4 jobs to choose from
>could be worse, know one guy so color blind they told him he had one job to choose form, PAC clerk
>fuck it, take 11X
>can't even get the Airborne incentive
>fuck
but really, with a score of 4 you never noticed she was stupid? Like,I knew a blonde who legit thought the Civil War was fought between the US and Germany. It was the sex, wasn't it? You were getting laid on the regular and you just over looked it.
>>
>>32977280
No. At that point, the stupid loops. You assign the motivations and reasoning of a normal human being to the bitch, and she, being incredibly stupid but not handicapped, is so poor at understanding what you're saying-or why- and at expressing her own views that she can't reveal just how retarded she is. The communication is naturally so bad that you just think "bitch" rather than "literally too stupid to not do shitty things."

Add in some gaslighting and you'll just assume you're shit at getting your point across and go back to enjoying the anal.
>>
>be me
>Drop out of college
>Get EMT cert
>Can't get EMS job because no driver's license
>Work Security and hate it
>Talk to army recruiter
>Take asvab
>Get a 99 with line scores in the 140s
>Recruiter wants me for 35t or 35f
>Remember that I smoked a shitload of weed in college
>And was on SSRIs for awhile
>And have mild asthma
>Chicken out because unwilling to lie at MEPs
It's not over though. I'm currently in the process of moving to Israel and joining the IDF.
>>
>>32978052
Also I like dudes too and it looks like DADT is coming back.
>>
>>32974287
but thats wrong. The Marines take people who get even 32s. i know this because i know a motor t Operator who got a fucking 32.
>>
>>32978258
I thought 40 was the highest they took lmao
>>
>>32973055
What were your PST scores?
>>
>>32978267
nope. they let some dumb motherfuckers in.
>>
>>32975166
>Implying air force medical isn't absolute shit.

Might just have been my base, but God, it was awful.
>>
>>32973995
Do you think people would do that? Just go into the military and get fucked in training so that they never have to work again for the rest of their lives?
>>
>>32978292
I thought it was a ceiling not a floor.
>>
>always wanted to fly C-130's
>good at baseball and had some small colleges offer me
>family friend knows a coach at USAF academy
>he suggests I try to play baseball at the academy
>USAF coach tells me about prerequisites for the team
>"so I won't go hit batting practice or anything?"
>no you have to pass x requirement and y standards
>just follow girlfriend to uni instead
>it doesn't work out and now I am 23 and can't fly C-130s
Sometimes I wonder. But my buddy who played football there transferred to a PAC-12 school and is on TV a lot, I transferred to UT and saw the cocks not glocks protest.
>>
>be 19 year old me
>directionless autist
>kinda like the military
>join
>get training as a RT operator
>assigned to my unit
>do nothing all day
>never have any idea what is my job
>get yelled at when i dont do things i wasnt told to do
I wish i got infrantry so much this shit is retarded
>>
>>32973995
this >>32976043

It's not fucking worth it.
>>
>>32973995
my grandfather was injected with some weird shit while in basic training or whatever for the navy in the early 80s that had him paralyzed for a few years. Now he's fine, but the government pays him like $1000 a month I think and all he's done for the past 35 years is get high and be an all around piece of shit. Doesn't work or anything and still owes a shit load of child support or something. Fuck him /blog
>>
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>mfw sub 80 ASVAB score rates

enjoy wanting to kill yourself for 4 years and being surrounded by nig nogs
>>
>no idea what I wanted to do with my life
>made no plans after high school, didn't apply to any colleges
>just wanted to die
>talk to recruiter
>take intro tests
>do well
>take language test too
>do well
>35P
>but you have to renounce nonamerican citizenship
>decide against it
>now going to community college and working in retail

sometimes I wonder if I made the right call
>>
>>32978389
Yes. Generally these people come in as a cook or supply and have family/homies that have already worked the system and told them what to do.
>>
>>32978627
>>get yelled at when i dont do things i wasnt told to do
>I wish i got infrantry so much this shit is retarded

That is literally every day in the infantry.
>>
>>32979595
What country, /k/omrade?
>>
>>32976739
Define 'excellent health and shape'
>>
>>32973171
>>23 pull ups
>requirement
yeah, nah.
>>
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Guys im a 5'9" manlet, how do I get into one of these?
>>
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>Be me
>join Marines
>Get infantry contract
>letsdothis.jpeg
>get to bootcamp
>ohgawdwhathaveidone!?
>not so bad really
>get deployed to Iraq twice
>also not so bad
>get out, go to school, marry a doctor, life is good.
>>
>>32980492
talk to an Army or Marine recruiter
it's not like armor is a particularly desired or romanticized job, so you'll probably get the contract.
>>
>>32975429
>but just about every post on /k/ conveys that military life sucks

You will notice that those posts tend to be from certain services and certain specialties and often from people who personally failed to research and plan for a fucking career.

Air Force life doesn't suck unless you make the effort to choose badly. Coast Guard retention is even higher. There are reasons for that.

Forget all the Rambo dreams. THINK. Study. Become an informed potential recruit. Go to adult military forums catering to services which interest you.

Think career even if not initially planning on one.

Join the Air Force. Play with funs in your ample spare time with your ample disposable income.
>>
>>32973957
My friend fucked on the same this except the wall fell on his legs. Now he just plays Vidya and collects checks I'm almost jelly but he's Gunna be in wheel chair and has to re learn to walk.
>>
>>32978052
with those conditions, they're gonna put you in the shillposting squad m8
>>
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Guys I want to be a Master at Arms in the Navy

How retarded am I?
>>
>>32974563
An hour away on foot, maybe.

I miss Huchuca. Go check out he museum on post when you get a chance. Good civil war/Wild West era shit.

And don't forget cameltoe mountain. (The one that looks like a cameltoe, dumbass.) the sun sets over that mound and the sky just gets beautiful.
>>
>>32978258
>>32978292
>>32978267
>>32978479
32 is the lowest score the Marines will take. The ONLY reason it's not lower is because the Army has a min score of 31.
>>
>>32978389
>2001, serving in task force HQ in Kosovo
>become bros with the combat camera guys
>talk about AIT (I was Infantry)
>tell me about a chick in their AIT that was clearly a dyke, but hey DADT, thanks Bill
>graduate and everyone heads off to their assignments
>dyke gets to her first duty station and promptly tells her chain of command she is a dyke and wants out
>walks straight into a A/V job making 80k a year
>she had the job lined up before she even graduated AIT and before she initiated the DADT seperation
so yes, it happens, the ONLY reason I didn't have a problem with the repeal of DADT and alowing them to serve openly was so they couldn't punch out when ever they wanted to
>>
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>>32976924

Why hello, fellow bellow-woodsman.

I see you had the same experience as most of us. I recommend enjoying the fuck out of your GIbux and banging college bitches.
>>
>>32977160
This. Especially the infantry part

>t. 11C
>>
>>32973055
Okay, why in the fuck would you join the Navy if you don't like the water?
>>
>>32981244
>>32977160
>stay away from infantry
I was under the impression that people admired infantry, that they were the ones operating while other people stayed back like >>32976924 and worked in the armory or a myriad of other mundane things
>>
>>32981712
People admire the infantry because we have such a hard job. If you enjoy the suck, go infantry
>>
>>32980720
Not horribly, but unless you're in 8+ years, you're going to do boring gate guard duty.
>>
>>32979736
Norway and Canada

triple citizenship master race reduced to just US. figured it was better to keep them
>>
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>>32979049
Not judging, but you should respect your elders, come what may.
>>
>Straight White Middle-Class Male
>smart but lazy in HS, so no scolarships
>try full-time school and full-time job.
>Fuckit I'm joining the Airforce
>94 ASVAB, Call AF recruiter...wait 3 weeks.
>get a call from the Navy "hey kid wanna be a Nuke?"
>chose CT instead.
>1.5 years of school in Pensacola FL life's pretty good.
>now I'm in Norfolk, VA life's less good.
>got a call 2 weeks ago "Hey anon it's tech sargent McFucknuggets with Airforce recruiting, are you still interested in a career with us?"
>>
>>32977084
aren't there a bunch of neo nazis in the bundeswehr?
>>
>>32973867
airborne eat dicks
>>
>>32982017
Which CT?
>>
>call airforce recruiter
>1 minute into our conversation he asks if I have done drugs
>say yes because I am retarded
>tell me no tolerance tough shit and hangs up
>too nervous to call a recruiter for the past 3 years
>>
>>32974023
What the hell did you expect?
>>
>>32974023
>SEAL team getting ready to swim into Chinese harbor to sabotage a new missile carrier before it can cause damage in the pacific
>anon calls the Chink in charge of port defense
>"hey think you can warm up the water for me? I took a dip earlier and it was pretty chilly. Thanks lol!"
>>
>>32982017
>Norfolk
I know that feel. Fuck that place, I can't wait to leave
>>
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>>32975001
what the fuck
>>
>>32982530
god i hope so, maybe they'll overthrow their terrible government
>>
>>32982017
My dad had a similar story when he graduated college in the 80s and had received a commission as an infantry officer in the Corps and was back home for some reason

>dad was interested in high school and college to be a pilot
>Recruiters had an awesome force recon or scout sniper poster my Dad wanted
>Talks to the gunny
>never gets his poster
>fast forward through OCS and TBS
>dad is back home
>gunny calls and asks if he's interested in joining still
>2 Lt dad tells the gunny to fuck himself and that he wants his poster
>never gets his poster and the gunny never calls him again
>>
>Prior Navy
>leave
>Go to Chair Force
>have to retake the fucking ASVAB. Get a 94
>Choose SERE Specialist
>take PAST, pass it
>Go to bullshit basic
>fuck basic
>Go to Selection, take PAST, pass it. Fucking 130 people out of 160 fail it.
>30 of us go to selection
>selection ends only 5 of us left
>Sent up for further training on Team
>1.5 years of team training, pass get beret.
>Airborne, MACP I & II, SOCP, close combat courses, driving courses, scouting, Marine Corps recon courses
>Typical day now. Wake up at 7. Workout until 10. Go into work, get brief for jump. Pick my chutes for my jumps. Throw them in van
>11-1 is lunch, workout more then get lunch
>1 oclock, go and jump from some fucking planes
>get done at 4, shake chutes, drink beer go home at 5.
>replace parachuting with fighting depending on the day.
>>
>>32973055
Are you from Florida?
>>
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>>32982737

>gunny calls and asks if he's interested in joining still
>2 Lt dad tells the gunny to fuck himself and that he wants his poster
>never gets his poster and the gunny never calls him again

Golden. Also, other than a general lack of conflict, the 80s seemed like a pretty great time to be a in the Corps. So, I'm mirin that he got to. Hazing over paperwork, fuck political correctness, getting inked and laid in ports was just normal, etc. Everything is so fucking lame now.

>join Marines in 2013
>go to boot camp
>hope to remove kebab
>never remove kebab
>remove dust
>remove trash
>remove brain cells
>remove liver
>go to the field a lot
>go on a MEU

Born a few years too late. At least I got to party in Thailand.
>>
>was going to join immediately after HS
>recruiter was going to get me in
>mom convinced me to live in the real world awhile first
>realize its not worth dying for

It might be worth burning down, though. A house can only have so many termites before its unsound and unsafe.

This planet seems like that house most the time.
>>
>>32977188
I gained nearly thirty pounds...

12X to 150 hahaha,

Had to chug a gallon of water prior to weighting in.
>>
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>18, dropped out of college and ROTC after a semester
>decide to enlist, 11X Op 40 cause i got an 86 on my ASVAB
>basic, avoided double rats by 2 lbs even though I'm a 137lb 5ft 6 manlet
>stay under the radar, make some good friends
>qual Expert, come out with a 245 PT score cause I'm a scrawny bitch that can run like the wind
"There's smart Rangers and strong Rangers, and I'm pretty sure we all know which kind you are PVT. Anon"
>jump school goes fine
>RASP
>barely pass sit ups, do ok on push ups and run for class up PT test
"Whatever, I'll be a smart ranger"
>MFW when Sgt. Tells me I'm being dropped
>MFW I'm stuck at Bragg trying to bang my 320
>waiting for deployment orders that never come
>>
>>32983131
It really was. He says he loved it and the first gulf war just made it even better when he was there as an infantry officer.
>>
Joined the Royal Marines, finished training get my green beret and commando flashes. Been in four and a half years now, not had a single active deployment, the RM's have not done active operations since pulling out of Afghanistan. Just endless shitty repetitive exercises while the public forgets what we are for, the lads that have done tours getting bored as Fuck and leaving or drinking and risk taking and getting in trouble and kicked out. Still increasingly spending less time each year with family and more time on shitty exercises.
>>
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>91 ASVAB
>join Army 19D 'cause I wanted to see some shit (this was back when the war was still a war)
>go to boot
>contract a "highly contagious disease"
>get sent home on medical leave
>get pinched for burglary while on leave
>fuckingfelony.shit
>go back to basic
>lawyer is telling me I MUST appear in court, cannot get more extensions from judge
>captain will not grant me leave, tells me it's "not his problem"
>go anyway
>appear in court, get charges dropped
>go back to TRADOC station
>get arrested
>Personnel Control Facility for a couple weeks
>served an OTH with re-entry code 4 and sent on my way
>feelsbadman
This was over a decade ago, and it turned out to be not that bad. Get letters every once in a while trying to convince me to seek for PTSD benefits to upgrade mydischarge
>>
>>32983676
Why did you steal
>>
>>32983676
why did you get caught?
>>
>>32983404
Did you get to black monday? I have always wanted to hear what that was like.
>>
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>Run out of money year three of college
>take ASVAB...kill it high 90s
>join USAF
>put me through intel school
>get selected for special duty to Aircrew
>finish computer science degree
>Air Force sends me to AFIT for Masters
>do several tours after with JSOC flying Recon aircraft
>pick up specialist schools along the way
>Now getting recruited for govi position
...find something that interests you and work hard at it and make shit happen. If you want a good career that focuses on education and specialized skills I think the USAF is really the only way to go. I've been joint my entire career and the Navy and ARMY don't develop their sailors or soldiers.
>>
>>32983683
>>32983691
Basically I was doing some urbex with some friends from highschool for auld lang syne and there were other people there fucking around, hence why the charges were dropped. I got caught up in their bullshit.
>>
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>>32983509

Now I'm just jelly.

What I wouldn't give to have gotten some in Desert Storm or OIF-I.

Does your dad happen to be a black dude built like a Gears of War character? Only 0302 I know that's been in since the 80s.
>>
>>32983404

Is 11X Option 40 still a thing?
>>
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>>32983712
Nope. They started out-processing me on the Friday before. All my buddies say it was stupid, Just a lot of bag dumps and getting smoked. The guys I know that made it/failed a couple times and came to Bragg say RASP is what they EXPECTED OSUT to be like, old school fuck fuck nonsense. Then again, I got there right at the beginning of a wave of hazing investigations, so shit was getting dumbed down. Or so I'm told.
>>
> join navy at 18
> turns out cute girls don't suck your dick immediately
> tell RDCs I'm depressed
> get kicked out

Now I work at a truck stop and I have almost no chance of getting a waiver for reenlistment.
>feelsbadman.jpg
>>
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>>32983808
Yes, I swore in May of 2016.
>>
>>32983845
Bump
>>
>>32975001
Do Airforce. Hot chicks in airforce
>>
>be 18 Britbong
>go to recrruitment office
>go signals, really promising career as EWOP
>5 weeks into phase 1
>get knee injury
>girlfriend nagging me to come home
>DOAR and leave
>work in DIY shop
>juust broke up with girlfriend...
>hate my life rn
>>
>>32983850

How's the pipeline going?
>>
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>>32983799
Nope, sorry to disappoint. He got out in the late 90s after finally attending flight school. He might have been built back then but now he's just a dad I guess. He was part of task force ripper, so 1st Marine Division. That's about all I know.

His claim to fame was being the youngest Marine promoted to captain since Vietnam.

Storm and Shield was my Dad's game but man OIF, Phantom Fury and Vigilant Resolve would have been my shit. Growing up and seeing that on the TV all the time. I'm about a year from graduating college now and I'm thinking about doing what my dad did, I have a feeling that we're heading into conflict soon.

Not sure if I'll enlist or be an officer yet, just because of my current lack of physical strength. But I'm working towards a 300 PFT right now
>>
>hurt shoulder 2 years ago while drunkenly making out with a girl
>it's never been the same since
>will never be innamilitary
>>
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>>32974052

Because physical strength is the most important attribute.
>>
>>32985869
It actually is.
Eagle Claw is on the Marines, nobody else. SEALs weren't even involved with that op.
>>
>>32981712
The infantry is for people who want to do soldier tasks. If you want to actually get out with skills usable for anything but contracting, don't go infantry. When we actually had lots of boots on the ground going places and recking stuff, Infantry was the place to be. Now if you aren't special forces, you don't fly, or you don't operate an ROV, you're going to dickbeat and police rocks.
>>
>>32979850
Not a fat body piece of shit. Let's work with around average height, which is 5'9-5'10ish (178-180cm) and work from there. You should be within the 12-20% body fat range, with decent lifts for the big three and solid cardio.

It's the sort of build you should develop after doing high school or college athletics. If you haven't done that shit, woe to you because you have a lot of catching up to do. AKA you probably won't be doing any spec ops shit.
>>
>>32973278
When I took the ASVAB in school (not sure if other schools do it, mine did) I had a similar situation. Air Force, Navy, and Marines all called, NG too but no Army for some reason.

>dropped out of DEP after 8 months
>getting shit together to go into Army now
>>
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>>32973095
>>32973055
>>
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>>32973699
>being this dumb
>>
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>want to be infantry
>29th birthday recently
>depressed I haven't gone for it yet
>want to go for it this year
>5'10"
>145-150lbs muscular build
>average cardio
>work out a little bit
>legs are a bit skinny
>worry about snapping my shit backwards in training
>have some college credits
I don't care I just want to go pew-pew, can I make it in?
>>
>>32986314
if you're cool with a snot-nosed 18 year old kid being your boss, go for it
>>
>>32986314
If you can do an ace PFT you're gold

But literally everyone will make fun of you for being old and you'll probably feel out of place with your peers seeing as they'll be fresh out of high school
>>
>>32986352
It would suck but might be worth it

>>32986354
Yeah, true. It could be rough. I think I will regret not going though. I should look into other MOS perhaps.
>>
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>>32975219
>tfw when I'm a broke dick and all I do is show up in the morning sometimes and then turn into a ghost for the rest of the day
>>
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>>32985620

Figured it was a stretch. That guy's one hell of a leader. Sounds like your old man is, too.

Neither of these rants are to discourage you, but from what I've been told by a Captain and two Lieutenants, the officer cadets get their MOS assigned on the basis of a wish list, and averages. So if there was an OCS class of 60. Split it into thirds whenever MOS time comes around. Twenty people each for Group A, Group B, and Group C. The guy who's averaging at the top of Group A gets to pick his first. Then the second guy , and the third, etc. Group B, it repeats for those twenty, etc. Most pepole want to be 0302s. So, this makes a guarantee on what job you'll get as an officer close to nonexistent. Verify this with active duty officers in the fleet, and officer recruiters (or whatever the fuck they're called) if the former isn't an option. I say this because, with all of the others policies that are changing, I might be feeding you outdated information. But, just a warning

Enlisted side, I can inform you of. The bullshit, busy-work when you're not in the field or at a range, standing by for hours, fuckery and politics within the chain of command (unless you're in some mythical unicorn of a unit full of good, honest Marines), field day, piss poor time management, kiss asses, word constantly changing, your quality of life as a boot (big one), people who care about tight sleeves and haircuts more than knowing weapons' capabilities, plus a laundry list of other nonsense, all REALLY suck and get VERY old. A lot of the longer field ops in places like 29 Palms and Bridgeport are miserable.

But, you'll get so close with your platoon/company/whatever buddies, it's insane. I've never had as tight of a group of friends as the guys I suffered, went on ship and to different countries with, that's what made the experience worthwhile. Even though the travel, and learning to use all sorts of machine guns and explosives was cool, the comraderie is all I miss.
>>
>>32973055
>i dont like-
Can you even do stuff in the military with a i dont/cant attitude.
>>
>>32977025
Dont forget rampant alcoholism.
>>
>>32982738
Former Air Fag here,
I'm looking to go back into the AF as SERE.
I read from an unofficial source that you only need a secret clearance to join in, but need a TS to re enlist.
Any truth to this?
I had a secret clearance before, but I've had too much fun for a TS clearance.
>>
>>32980492
The hatch opening?
>>
>>32977025

Verified. There were five divorces in our platoon after our last float.
>>
>21
>skinny as shit, 5'11 and 120lbs
>not too terirbly smart
>want to do a fun job in mil, but have no clue what to do
am I ever gonna be able to find something for me, or am I gonna be stuck hating life for 4 years?
>>
>>32985620

Are you Steve's kid?
>>
>>32986314

You can do it.
>>
>>32987416
Same here
>>
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>>32987507
thanks for ur encouragement anon
>>
>>32987553
I honestly feel like I shouldnt try seeing everyones scores of 80+, but Ive got like, zero job prospects rn
>>
>>32973770
>>32973867
>>32986139
You three might want to get checked for autism, or down syndrome.
>>
>>32973055
>be me 19
> join marines
>have lazy recruiter
>spend 9 months in DEP waiting for 03xx MOS
>finally go to boot camp
>sunnysandiego.jpg
>do really well for first few weeks
>last week of 1st phase get super sick
>end up in medbay for 3 days straight
>get sent to balboa hospital for 3 days
>find out i have spleenomegaly
>end up getting sent home
>not after 3 weeks in MRP and 2 weeks of RSP
Who here recon sniper platoon?
>>
>>32983845
Women will ruin your life with out brim physically there.
Top kek
>>
>98 on asvab as 15 year old HS junior
I'm 18 and a sophomore in college now and have not once been specifically contacted by anyone in the military (except my homie pvt. Valentine when he's got leave).
>>
>>32985869
lmao pupper get under a boat and do some land portage or hold a log over your shit and tell me how important physical strength is

everything physical matters for bud/s. when your neck starts feeling so shitty that you can't even hold your head up straight or when your classmates fuck your shit up due ot weakness, no amount of gung-hoo will save you.
>>
>>32975091
They do... The Kurds.

You'll probably end up cleaning other people's shit unless you have some sort of experience, but you'll have cool stories to tell.

>be me
>join Kurds
>squad attacks fortified ISIS position
>kills guards
>beheads commander
>acquires munition stockpiles

Cool anon, which part did you do?

"Oh, I cleaned the porta shitter with a toothbrush"
>>
>>32973095
>DD-214

What does that even mean?
>>
>>32973171
>23 pull ups

Fucking impossible.
>>
>be me
>read this thread
>google "asvab"
>oh look an online test
>79% w/ zero prep
assuming I was ~19ish and US citizen, what does that mean for me?
>>
>>32990644
>internet asvab
Jack shit
>>
>>32974563
>Obviously still Phase 4 (if that's what it's still called)
An hour? MFer Sierra Vista is literally outside of the gate. You're an hour from Tucson.
Have you seen Border Patrol arresting illegals on post while doing PT yet?
>>
>>32990380
I can do 30 pull-ups.
>>
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>>32973171
Joined the USMC grunts during the Iraqi surge. 96 asvab, 275 PFT.

Your shit is wrong cuz.
>>
>>32979595
you made a terrible decision. Renounce the citizenship of whatever dump of a country you also have citizenship in and take that fucking job.
>>
>>32980788
except it has now become a way to receive unwarranted promotions and awards.
>>
>>32982738
GT?
>>
>curious about military
>take asvab
>comes back 97, 137 GT
>talk to Navy recruiter about Nuke
>$12000 signing bonus $100000 reenlistment
>go to MEPS and enlist
>New Years party
>get piss drunk
>walk home
>cant open door
>try window
>pull too hard and break window locks
>stick my head in
>not my fucking house
>homeowner calls cops
>douche cop estimates ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS of damage
>felony charge
>judge sees it's bullshit and drops case after I pay the guy back
>turns out that military looks at all dropped cases as basically guilty plea

Now I'm stuck working at a gym, trying to get into college, and I can't ever work for the government because some cop thought a window was worth $1,000.
>>
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>>32991005
>nuke
Hahahahaha..... no you're better off doing what you're doing.
>>
>>32982530
in the east yes. i dont know about the west
>>
>>32990380
We have a saying in the UK-

sub 9 run time
40 questionable push-ups
>>
>>32973699
Marines eat crayons and glue
>>
>>32991014
I realize now that it's probably better that I'm not doing nuke but the fact that I can't even go to a different branch because some cop was a shit house appraiser is pure asscheeks.
>>
>>32987043
Basically how it worked back in the 70s and 80s in Belgium.
The best candidate officers got priority for affectation, which meant you did your best rather than just try enough to pass.

It was the glorious time where you could get away with a lot of bullshit because we were deployed right next to the Iron Curtain, with a credible threat ready to swarm through (or so we thought).

Now, the army has been gutted of its manpower and is doing basically police jobs...
>>
>>32990373
He doesnt even know of the light! Hahaha...

Its our free slave papers, marks of emancipation. We are free negros!
>>
>>32973101
>>get sick, nothing too bad
>>but I start losing weight, even when i get put on double rats
>>weight won't stop dropping
Sure you didn't get TB m80?
>>
>>32990380

I can do 25 relatively easy, 35 if I can goof on form.
>>
This thread lmao. Nothing but drops and crybabies.

Wahhhh. I didn't get to join the military, so I went to college.

Guess what, So did I. For free plus payed to do so.
>>
>>32987493
Nope, my dad and I are both Robert.

>>32987043
Yeah, I figure it's going to suck anyway you slice the cake. I know more about the OCS process from when my Dad was in and if what you say is right, it sounds like it hasn't changed a whole lot.

Be the best or get stuck doing something you didn't want. That's kind of what makes enlisting seem more desirable, because I want to be infantry.

But I've got some time to figure things out.
>>
>>32991923

>both Robert

Good, I was pretty worried there for a moment.
>>
>>32978483
Talk to air force reserve/national guard units. They hire new pilots annually and sponsor them to go to UPT. Mostly airlift and refueling gigs, but that means you can get a c-130 job if you really want it.
>>
>>32991974
Now I'm curious to know who Steve was.

Tell me anon.
>>
>>32973171

>take ASVB for shits n giggles
>get 94 w/o trying
>there are people that score 35
>thirty fucking five

Holy shit, even Gump got a 40
>>
>>32992164

Really young CPT I knew. Good guy. Basically, I was terrified that one of his kids was on this weird-ass board.
>>
>>32991005
Shouldn't have been hammered enough to broken a window you dumb shit. Your fault.
>>
>>32992201
Haha, nah man but that would have been some shit.

Still seems like a small world.
>>
>>32974253
Chair Force is easiest, but promotion is slow because many airpersons actually like it.
Infantry little use in real world. Use GI Bill to go to real school (not Police Academy).
Tech specialties (or the impacted medical ones) are the way to go.
>>
>>32992408

I have encountered at least a dozen milfags I've served with on here.
>>
>>32990373
never served detected
can you even into block 24?
>>
>>32975324
why, because you'll get up from your desk and turn up the AC?
>>
>>32981273
I don't particularly like being IN the water.
Biggest problem was Dig-It lifer assholes with no people skills.
Made E-5 under 4, got out before re-upping, training has gotten me great jobs (3383, surface RO).
>>
>>32981712
People respect infantry.
People also realize it doesn't translate well to most civilian jobs except partially to police.
>>
>>32982017
Should'a gone nuc. 2 1/2 years school (ET).
>>
>>32991005
Yeah, too stupid to be a nuc.
The $100k is fudged. You'd've gotten half - taxes; the other half is spread over the next 24 months.
But you wouldn't've made it. Attrition is high.
>>
>>32991014
What's wrong with being a nuke?
>>
>>32992834
1. The school has the highest suicide rate in the military
2. It's tied with BUD/S for dropouts (and when you drop you have little to no control over your new rate, could send you CS or even undesignated)
3. High chance of being on a sub.
4. Job is tough and shitty and you won't ever go on liberty.
100k Re-enlistment or walking straight into a 100k+/yr civvie nuclear plant job are pretty tempting though.
>>
>>32992834
The problem is with that stupid poster.
>>32993153
Most of my classmates who went to subs stayed in at least a while. Surface ship (was cruiser) had more BS; carriers are the worst for that.
Look up "EM Log"
>>
>>32992834
>>32993153
5. You might start glowing in the dark after a few years of those 100k
6. 100k is tempting for your first job but isn't really THAT much. Especially when you do the average merican family thing, i.e. try to support a current girlfriend, 2 ex wives, and 3 kids, with those 100k...
>>
>>32993153
Overseas liberty sux because the plant is almost always kept running.
NO, you don't walk straight into operating a land power plant.
>>
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------------PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT------------

Keep it under wraps as you shoot the shit, warfighters.

If you aren't assuming the IP addresses on this site haven't been compromised to hell by Russian/Iranian/Chinese/American/whoever CNE, you're tragically wrong. Based on what you spill, you could magically lock goo-goo eyes with a 9/10 with big boobs and a questionable accent and creed in a bar/shopping mall near you!

Your overwatch,

SGT Safety :D
>>
>>32993638
Like I haven't posted TS/SCI FVEY shit on 4chan behind seven proxies before?
>>
>>32980492
Too tall. 4'8" maximum height allowed to be a crew member.
>>
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>>32994232
They're crewed entirely by undocumented Mexican children. Trump's wall is a secret bid to replace the Abrams.
>>
>>32993638
I have state secrets hidden inside my testicles, I hope the russians dont send any spies to suck them out
>>
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>>32973278
Other guys who replied are right. I got a 96 and a 135 ft. I went Infantry in the army. I regret it. I'm still regretting it.
There's glory, sure. Getting shot and and dropping mortar rounds and RPGS flying over head when your taking a shit(fucking Helmand, Pic related), but to think I could've been fucking chill in my whole contract and got out to a massively high paying job? I not only shot myself in the foot, I blew my foot clean the fuck off.
>>
>>32973055
>>I drop out in the swimming because I don't like the cold water
Typical retard BUD/s dud
Have fun being undes, quitter.
>>
>>32973867
>tfw ran out of snakes
>>
>>32975324
kek from a soldier
>>
>>32994651
>turn 18
>join navy
>become corpsman
>2 years later, am waiting on hearing about orders for next command
>>
>>32977188
I lost 10 at first then gained almost 50lbs. I was 6ft, 228lb with a 32 inch waist when I left.
>>
>>32994642
GT not Ft.
>>
>>32994642
I got a 96 as well and went 12b. Is this picture taken on route beaver or something by FOB williams? A little northwest of sangin?
>>
>>32991877

>Payed

Wanna know how I can tell you're former military?

The stupid doesn't go away
>>
>>32973055
>Be 18
>Go to college.
>Never have to join the military.
>Parents are rich and I inherited their house.
>Dad was a gun collector.
>I get to play with things /k/ only dreams of getting.

I love being American.
>>
>>32994766
From FOB Shorab
>>
>be me
>join army
>11b
>graduate with 283 pt score and shot expert
>finally get to company
>get put in training room
God dammit
>>
>>32994891
Payed might as well be as normalized as paid.

>to pay
>>
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> go to radio school
> get sent to 1st unit
>
> get blown up.
> get blown up again.
> get blown up a 3rd time
> blown up enough they can legally declare me retarded
> ship home
> medical discharge
> monthly disability check
> kicked my addiction to prescription pain killers
> go to tech school
> do welding
> well that was fun, now what else...
> do more college(army is paying for it and me as well)
> easy life, tons of free time, money to feed my guns and netting $2800 a month from government
> do history, journalism, and machining
> thinking of dropping journalism because my professor exclaimed it ok to blatantly lie so long as a message is made.
>>
>>32995181
Okay a little more west than I thought. Everything looks the same there anyway.
>>
>>32996592
Kuwait too. So much fucking sand.
>>
>>32973055
>i want to be hardcore!
>but i am not hardcore!
>this sucks they wont let me be hardcor!
faggot.
>>
>>32983845
similar story
no clear road for redemption
fucking kill me
>>
>>32982570
dunno who was more retarded, you for not lying or him for hanging up on you.

Buddy of mine got a drug charge in his senior year of high school. Busted for pot. He was talking to a marine recruiter at the time and they got a waiver for him so he could still join. He ended up not doing it anyway.
>>
>>32990373
l m a o
n o
s e r v i c e
>>
>>32978052
BROTHER!!!!
>>
>>32978161
nvm.

I'm not a fag. Condolences comrade.
>>
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>>32973278
I mean I would try for a WOFT slot as an Army pilot if I had to do it again.
>>32994642
Its got its benefits.
>>
>>32990373
>Doesnt even know what the almighty holy grail of freedom is.

Its been 3 months and I still sometimes take mine out and gaze at it lovingly. Its surreal, like "this is what makes me free."

I totally took freedom forgranted before the military, my DD214 is the physical talismanic symbol of getting my fucking life back.
>>
>>32997361
The army recruiter gave me two months and tested my piss twice before taking me to MEPS lol
>>
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>>32998057

>mfw EAS coming soon to a theater near me

What's it like, being a real boy?
>>
>>32998108
Getting your DD214 is probably the definition of anticlimactic.

You have this mad crazy scramble to get all the admin shit done for it, then you go to base,IPAC and some bored admin drone has you give like 3 signatures, then slides it across the desk at you with no fanfare.

It doesnt really hit you until you are on the way home. I was driving across the desert from 29 palms and I shit you not, this rainbow pops off across the desert.

I pulled over along side the highway somewhere past amboy in the middle of the desert, got out of my car, and laughed like a maniac until I had tears in my eyes.

I grinned like an idiot from there all the way to salt lake city.
>>
>>32998288
Its.... like going on leave but about twice as intense a feeling, and its not tainted with the dread that you have to go back.

I dont know what you do, but I was an infantryman in the stumps, and you live with this shadow hanging over your sholder for so many years.

Even leave, theres always that anxiety at the back of your head that you HAVE to be back by such and such date in uniform, in formation by 0600 or whatever.

As you drive away from the base that shit just dissolves away.

Expect nightmares about being late to formation and out of uniform, or losing your rifle and stupid shit like that.

Ive been in 27 gunfights, been blown up a few times, youd think id have nightmares about THAT. nope. Mine are about getting dragged to battalion for an NJP or being in formation and realizing im in the nude.
>>
>be me, in high school
>mom says apply for some scholarship
>ok, can't afford college on my own, have no idea what I want in life
>get full ride nrotc scholarship
>graduate and commission
>now in flight school, life is great
>aunt I met once when I was like 5 died, left me $30k
>life is now even better

Ayyyy, breaking my family's cycle of poverty, and all because I put I was native American on my nrotc application (at the least I'm sure it contributed), when I'm only 1/64.
>>
>>32994232
I knew girls und panzer was real!
>>
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>>32998535
the old fake indian trick, works (almost) every time
>>
>>32998666
I like firewater and can't grow a beard, I figure that makes me an honorary native american
>>
>>32998535
where are you at in training?
>>
>>32998728
About to finish IFS, so literally just started. I was stashed for 7 months, didn't get to Pensacola until this last November
>>
>>32979049
That sounds awesome, dude has it made.
>>
>>32998753
gross navy fag. nvm
>>
>>32998763
jk, I'm waiting to start the 64D course and thought you might of been at my post.
>>
I ship soon... But my story so far:
>22 over weight but within %
>want 31k but knows its unrealistic so il take the 20k bonus with 31b instead
>day before meps and no 31series jobs have shown up at all
> find out its because my DL was going to expire in 3 days
>go get that fixed and tons on 31series show up on listing, almost all have giant bonuses (20k)

>meps bitch tried fucking me over on blood pressure by doing blood pressure just after doing underwear Olympics and tells me to cross my legs for a "better pressure"
>sort out blood pressure shit in 2 days
>recruiter tells me that 31k was avalable the day after i did meps but was told to not talk it for me cuz they werent sure i would get it in time and its gone now
>okay so what are my options
>single 31b (5 year) (8k)
Fuck
>oh well my local police force carries military time to thier retirement..
>do my first physical test.. Easy

> first future soldier program training
>we run 2 miles and it kicks my ass

Im actually looking forward to boot, im tired of being a fat sack of shit that cant run..
>>
>>32998398
will you be my papa
>>
>>32998288
>>32998398

Wasn't an 03, but I left 29 Stumps a few months ago.

I literally cried as I was leaving.

Fuck 29 stumps, fuck lake bandini, fuck the sand, it feels good to be free.

I got approached by a few boots trying to recruit me at college later, and gave them the middle finger and smiled
>>
>>32998806
here is some advice. the guy across from me was a fatty. all through basic and into AIT (we were Infantry so OSUT) he was only permitted to eat from the "health food bar" meaning he got like 2 boiled eggs and a slice of cheese for breakfast and maybe some fruit. when we came to the end of AIT and it was time to DX unserviceable uniforms, I didn't realize how much weight he had lost until he pulled his pants out from his waist. no shit I think he lost 6 inches off his waist, maybe more. he failed his final PT test and retest and got chaptered. Kinda sad. After all my time in the Army and my two tours inna Iraq I wonder how his life went.
>>
>>32999672
Im gunna work my ass off and make it, ive already lost 2lbs from just eating better, wish me luck bro.
>>
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>>32999599
Yeah, I got approached by a national guard guy thinking he could dazzle me with his cammies and fast military speak.

I told him I already done my time and laughed my ass off.

Also some kind of prior service recruiter keeps calling my friggin house trying to get me to be an MP in the reserves after college saying I could be a sergeant. WTF does a reserve MP even DO?

I replied IF I ever went back it would
A) have to be during a declared war
B) I wpuld use my college to do so as an officer, preferably in order to be a pilot.


I spent too much time getting my ass shot off looking up at the flyboys and enviously contemplating my poor choice of career to ever go back to being a leg.

I think of prior service recruiters as that guy in the commercial doing pic related.
>>
>>32999307
How good are you at pretending to be a girl?
>>
>>32999723
cut out soda now and drink only water or white milk
SURPRISE! It's just like basic training!
>>
>>32999757
When my DI saw a recruit drink milk they took sadistic pleasure in ITing him after the meal until he barfed it back out.
>>
>>32999731
>Also some kind of prior service recruiter keeps calling my friggin house trying to get me to be an MP in the reserves
when I had to go see the inservice recruiter I was like "look man I just did two tours of Iraq, I'm done, I'm going home to be fat and lazy" he was clearly pissed from dealing with combat vets that didn't give a fuuuuuck. He had me fill out a contact card and I put down some bullshit number.
>>
>>32999873
I never gave them my number, they just had it from somewhere. I love how in the military it doesnt matter how well you performed, how awarded you were, or how hard you worked.

Not reenlisting?

You must be a REEEAAAAL piece of shit huh?

I think that was what irritated me most about leaving honestly. All my officers and staff who I got along great with and who trusted me with huge responsibilities like, turned on me overnight and I was suddenly being treated like a fuck-up.

I get nostalgic sometimes and gotta remind myself why I left. I fully understand why beaten women crawl back to their shitty husbands.
>>
>>33000024
Happened to me too, I worked my ass off for my command, and even forfeit weekends for months on end in garrison. Then the second I say I'm not going to re-enlist, they treat me like I'm garbage.

I'm free now and they can all go fuck themselves
>>
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>>33000254
Jokes on them, we were smart enough to realize a house nigger still aint a free nigger.

They can stay in and be house niggers, I's be free! Gots mah walkin papers from massa hisself!
>>
>>32982017
What ship you on, Senpai?
CG-68 Muhfuggah
>>
>>32977084
You should go home.
>>
I see all of these high 90s ASVAB scores..

I only got a 76. How is that for trying to get into the air force?
>>
>>33001887
What's your GT?
>>
>>33002106
I'm not sure. I'd have to check back with my instructor, but is it possible for you to tell without it?
>>
>>33002106
I also didn't study before taking the test, if that helps. I just heard about it and went in and took it. I aced the academics section, but struggled on electronics and mechanics area.

Do you think I should retake it? Or am in better off keeping what I got?
Do I have a chance in the AF?
>>
>>33001540
DDG-51
>>
>>32999749
Dont act like you are picky. It was about month 3 of deployment that I realized during the long shadows of sunset, a camelspider meandering about looks like two women in coitus. I masturbated right fucking there.
>>
>>32987594
>bulking

yeah OK lol
>>
>>32978161
>looks like don't ask don't tell is coming back
You couldn't be more wrong. They'll have trannies eligible to serve by the end of the year.
>>
my military story

>be 23
>apply to join the Canadian Infantry reserves
>...
>months later, sporadic phone tag- they never return my calls
>...
>a year later, finally get lucky and write the qualifier exam
....
>get word back that the retarded reference system has rejected my application (4 people who have known you for the last 4 years continuously, not friends or family)

Fuck that
>>
>be 17
>Thinking of joining Air National Guard
>Ready to sign contract
>Army ROTC scholarship comes in the mail
>full ride
>Do school for 4 years
>have a shit GPA
>Get put in the National Guard
>They want me to be a Cav Scout
>Not that big of a faggot
>Interview for an aviation slot
>somehow get it
>do flight school
>get back
>have no idea what I'm doing

I have to fly tomorrow too
>>
>>32978052
>>32978161

Kike Faggot
>>
Hypothetically speaking, if a 16 year old who had been diagnosed with Asthma at a very young age by a quack, but in reality the kid was just fat. Suppose this kid has gone from 250 American Points(lbs) to 205 and is slowly increasing his cardio vascular. To get a rough idea his 16 year old did 110 floors on a stair climbing machine(The same amount of floors the Sears(Willis) tower has) in 15 minutes. What would this 16 year old have to do to get into the armed forces? He prefers the Marines and has already been to PT. He turns 18 in the first week of April 2018
>>
>>32998288
Holy shit
>>
>>32991077

Breh, the right recruiter at the right time, probably army infantry during the next conflict. I know a heroin addict that left a 21 day rehab and got waived through immediately
>>
>>32973055
So you got through hell week and THEN you figured out you don't like water?
>>
>am really good at standardized tests like the ASVAB
>6'0 150lbs and pretty out of shape
send help
>>
>>32975429
Hey dude I'm in the same boat. I was like 250 but I started a simple diet of 1200 calories a day and I've lost over 30 lbs. Didn't even change what I ate.
Now I'm in the DEPARTURE for the Marine Corps. I think it's just a good way to find your feet in your real. What do you have to lose?
>>
Took asvab scored a 51, became an aviation machinists mate in the Navy. Spent 5 years in whidbey island Washington, did too much partying there and on deployment. Shore duty in point mugu California, it was fucking terrible. Back to sea duty in point mugu, had a blast, got out after 10 years because my wife and son are more important
>>
>>32974409
what battery at fort sill?
>>
>>32986069
How does dropping out of the DEP work? I heard it was a DQ for life.
>>
>>32979501
Most jobs open up with 60+ on the asvab
>>
>>33007944
got a 66 and now I'm in the Air Force working for a spooky three letter agency, can confirm
>>
>>32996530
Do engineering. If you have autism you'll fit right in.
>>
>>32980794
Lol I messed up the registration process so now I have to wait for the next semester, got a job bending tacos and get tips and free weed because I'm a charming son of a bitch.

Just now this hipster dude and girl invited me to their place to smoke pot, 3 things might happen

>go and hang out and get stoned
>go and hang out, get stoned and fuck his girl
>go and hang out, get stoned and get turned into a lampshade

I think its worth the risk, same thing happened when I was still in.
>>
>>32998288
Fucking pottery m8

Drove out of Pendleton and Oceanslime for the last as I made way to the Central Valley to see my parents and then to glorious PNW.

It was boner inducing
>>
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>>32977207
So fetal position, got it.
>>
>>32975091
are you me?
>>
What are some good books to study for asvab? I have physical fitness as down as I plan on getting it(20+ pullups, well under 6 min mile, lots of push-ups), but my only real experience with standardized tests is the SAT. I didn't study much at all and did no practice problems for the SAT, but I got a 1450/1600, because I read a lot and am good at math. I feel like I could do really well for the asvab if I study right. I plan on going to ROTC to try and get to rasp, but if I do really well on the asvab what other options mighy open up for me?
>>
>>33009620
Fuck I thought this was /meg/, holy shit. Ignore this post, mods please don't ban me.
>>
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>be 2 75
>E4 for 2 years so already hounded by NCOs and peers for not having tab
>go to Ranger School and get to MTNs
>double no-go MTNs and fail
>get dropped from Ranger School
>come back to Batt as a failure
>get shitted on for next 6mo
>kicked out of 2 75 because they said I "LoM'd" in Ranger School
Meh, got 2 deployments out of it and made some serious bros for life.
You can tell an Airborne Ranger by his RI!
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