What have you done to make your body into a weapon?

>>32932832
My farts are pretty deadly.

>>32932832
What have you done to make your thread weapon related?

>>32932832
I strap a gun and knife to it everyday.

>>32932917
I had to register my hands as deadly weapons.

Crammed it full of all manner of harmful chemicals

>>32932832

Sharpen the mind. For even the smallest dagger is deadly when knowingly applied to Achilles' heel.

>>32932922
only answer
me human, me have tools

File: IMG_2229.jpg (215KB, 1412x1412px) Image search: [Google]

215KB, 1412x1412px

>>32932956

>>32932832
bought a gun

>>32932959
Tools will fail. In some places you can face serious legal consequences for carrying a weapon even if it's only to protect yourself. But they can't take away your hands and feet.

>>32932980
Then buy new ones and conceal them better. Also, stop being a delusional 14 year old, batman.

>>32932980
>tools will fail
Steel is stronger than flesh, dipshit

Been lifting for a year. Made 1/2/3/4 on a dirty bulk

>>32932960

Don't be dumb. Fight Smart™.

>>32932832
Clicked report thread.

Strapped a 1911 to it.

>>32932980
haha yeah I don't go places that don't let me keep my gun. i'm gonna be just fine

>>32932980
Go watch another movie, retard

>>32932832
9 years of amateur boxing, 3 years of kickboxing, 5 years of BJJ. 3 knee surgeries and far too many concussions later I just keep the cardio up and hit bags/light spar.

All anyone needs is a baseline experience in grappling and the mental capacity to go for the eyes, throat and groin as far as being a weapon and not a competitor.

>>32933084
>All anyone needs is a baseline experience in grappling and the mental capacity to go for the eyes, throat and groin as far as being a weapon and not a competitor.

This. The super trained karate/mma myth will get you laughed at in a real highly dangerous street fight/defense situation. You do what you have to do to stay alive.

>>32933029
weight training will only get you so far, you should really buy a gun

>>32933100
Do both

>>32933090
>hurr durr the streetz

There's literally nothinga street fighter can do that I a boxer can't except that the boxer actually knows how to throw a good punch

>>32933045
So you never go to an airport or the DMV? You never go to a bar?

Man I should have known /k/ was full of NEETs

>>32933171

We don't need airports when we're unnaground

>>32932832
l have sharpened my penis to a razor sharp tip

l can undo my button fly and become fully erect in a split second, no one is going to mess with the 6 and a half inches of fury that is me

>>32933163
Point
--------
Your head

>>32932832
Muay Thai! That's one of my favorite things on this planet. See if you can find an official gracie school, and official muay thai school. Don't go any where if it doesnt have official criteria. Keep in mind some legit people have started out their own gyms in basements as a low belt, but turned out to be extremely legit. Study Muay Thai basic stretches, and technique. Push ups, sit ups, finish up by practicing shadow muay thai boxing / jui-jitsu escaping maneuvers. Get yourself to the blue belt level in jiu jitsu. I made my mind go to child to man. I wish I started it younger.

Can you learn muay thai as an adult? I know almost nothing about martial arts and after watching muay thai it first hand in Thailand I've been interested in picking it up.

>>32932832
I have epilepsy
If I time it right I can spook the fuck out of people with seizures

>>32933348
You could just piss and shit yourself without the seizure. No one will want to fight you with poopy in your pants.

>>32933325
Yes, of course you can.
Find a good gym, and take it seriously.
At the start it will be quit frustrating, and the first time sparring will bring you down to earth pretty quickly.
Why frustrating?
Because you are going to need a bit of time to land combinations, develop good foot work and high kicks wont be possible at the beginning.
Also do a lot of stretching and cardio work.

But it is worth the effort and a lot of fun.

>>32933171
I bring friends. You'd be amazed what a pack of full REEEEEE losers can accomplish together. Small scale beta uprising is best beta uprising.

Otherwise you should probably just break rules that say you should not carry a weapon because you'll never lift yourself capable of fighting multiple determined assailants.

>>32932832
I sit on the couch and drink beer on a regular basis

>>32932910
First post best post

File: IMG_3613.jpg (17KB, 300x183px) Image search: [Google]

17KB, 300x183px

>Be me
>Pic related
>Leader of the Decepticons
>See thread
>"What have you done to make your body into a weapon?"
>Laugh manically as I transform and blast away kebabs and school children
>Democrats can't ban me because I'm a non-white trannie

>>32933325
Most people don't start training until after adolescense. In the U.S. you'll probably have trouble finding a purely mauy thai gym but most MMA gyms have a mauy thai or mixed kickboxing program thats mostly mauy thai

>>32932980
And then you break your hand after 1 punch. What then dingleberry?

>>32933463
>break your hand after one punch

Well you could try not punching with bad form or use a palm strike, hammer fist, knees, elbows or any other kind of strike that isn't punching.

>>32933471
>Wooossshhhhh

>>32933474
Nigga have you ever been in a fight? Even in grade school? Peoples hands aren't made of glass.

>>32933567
Motherfucker I broke my God damn hand on someone's head, I'm speaking for personal fucking experience you dipshit.

>>32932832
I've been in a shit ton of bar fights, and the worse thing to happen to my hands was a broken pinky and some chumps front tooth lodged in my middle knuckle. I had to take anti-biotics for like a month though since he was such a yuckmouth.

>>32933605
See
>>32933659

Don't punch with a limp wrist and drink some fucking milk. Your bones are weak

>>32932832
I've taught it how to effectively use firearms

>>32932922
/thread