/k/ has acquired Cheyenne Mountain Complex

>>32833767
Make Anime real.

>(yes it has a functioning Stargate)

Well obviously we fuck a whole lot of ayy lmaos.

>>32833784
>space herpes
sounds nice

Fuck aliens

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>>32833778
FPBP!

>>32833767

Sit in computer chairs, spin around really fast while going "WEEEEEE!"

>>32833803
>Not the superior skidding around on the bunker with the chairs.
>Or jousting with your fellow /k/ommandows with them/

>>32833767
>tfw unscheduled offworld activation

Wat do?

>>32833824
Chair jousting is for plebs. Chair bowling is the sport of kings.

>>32833839
take cover as thousand /k/ommandos rush to the gateroom to ambush the uninvited guests

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Personally, I'd pretend to be Teal'c and go around addressing everyone by their full names in a gruff voice then masturbate vigorously to a poster of Amanda Tapping in her prime, and as I nut shout

"HrmmmmmMAJOR CARTERRRRRRR"

>>32833784
Have colonel carter show me her wormhole!

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Play tic tac toe with the WOPR.

>>32833803
>>32833824
>Not grabbing the biggest fire extinguishers in the complex and having drag races.

>>32834389

Not enough psi to really move you. I'm sure there is a fire hose we can do that with. I got a game we can play too. We all get drunk and stand in the room together, with the empty fire hose laying there on the ground...it's nozzle already turned on. Some one then turns the main valve, letting water flow through the hose. Thing beings to fly around, the heavy hose head is smashing into desks, computers, ppl...Just destroying what it hits. Last one standing wins the game.

>>32833767

If it has a working stargate, I then open up a disposal service. One small fee and your probl....I mean trash, your trash is gone.

>(yes it has a functioning Stargate)
Find an uninhabited planet, set up a huge poppy and weed farm thousands of light-years from Earth's jurisdiction.

Use profits to set up a weapons factory with the fanciest CNC shit you can think of.

The rest of the planet can be a massive safari park.

>>32833767
>look for space elves
>fuck space elves
>take over the galaxy with our Halfling spawn
dibs on the space elf princess.

>>32834433

Can I hunt other humans in this safari?

>>32833784
Also known as the Daniel Jackson approach.

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>>32834470

>/k/ube worshiping elves

The only good kind of elf.

We must secure one of every weapon in the galaxy. It is our holy duty, comrades.

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1. Go full blown space explorer to find out how many earth like planets there are or if there are planets made out of recources like a planet with oceans of pretrol. Cheyenne Mountain serves as a earth bridgehead.
2. Use the given recources or space to develop a place for a new, gun loving democratic society (earth is for the no guns).
3. Migrate to new gun world, which will dedicate almost 70% of all Industry related jobs to the militry (similar to how germany used it's industry before WW1), People flurish of off pilaging neighbouring planets for recources or alien slaves.
4. 100 years later, a completely new, free, gun loving space faring human society is created and arrives on the ashes of earth battlefields on which the old powers fought their unnecessary nuclear war. What is left are mutants and ruins, which get salveged for technology or weapons. After stripping earth clean from anything valuable, it will be finally abandomed.
5. Mankind lives happily ever after fucking aliens, drinking spacebeer and fighting space wars (even as a space door gunner), everything is fine.

>>32834470
you can't just call dibs on the space elf princess fag. We have to roll for that shit or something.

>>32833854
>Invading Jaffa army is defeated by a thousand nuggets

Nyet shol'va, rifle is fine.

>>32833839
In the show they used, what, a titanium iris moving at 0 m/s?

I figure a wall of lead moving at ~800m/s will do even better!

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>>32834544
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little Shol’va? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Ashraks, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on the Tok’ra, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in furling warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire Jaffa corps. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with terror strikes the likes of which has never been seen before in this system, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Chaapa'ai? Think again, go’tak. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of Zatarks across the galaxy and your position is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking kek, Kal'ma. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in Mastaba, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the High Council of System Lords and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the galaxy, you little Gonach. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn Ha'shak. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. kek kel shak,Kal’ma .

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>>32833767
Live out my 90's operator fantasies.
MP5s! MP5s FOR EVERYONE! AND YOU MY DEAR BOY, YOU MAY HAVE A USAS

>>32834547
That'll work until a wormbrain with a personal shield generator shows up. The iris was the best option because it kept all physical matter from getting through.

>>32834485
Well the planet was uninhabited remember, so you'd have to bring them yourself.

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>what do?

Pic related

>>32833767
Weaponize it?

Does it have Skynet?

Meet motherfuckin' MacGyver!

Well I'd kill sandniggers and fuck 90's Carter of course

Play Global Thermonuclear War and maybe a nice game of chess.

>>32834195
This desu.

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>>32836299
>Sir?

>>32836692
she did not age well.

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>>32836699
if you think she didn't age well, look at what happened to Jack

>>32836751
Nigga got fat as fuck dawg

>>32836751
He can play general hammond in the reboot that will never happen.

>>32836760
*no-one* will be allowed to play Hammond in a remake, there is only one true SGC commander, and that is George Hammond played by Don S. Davis