/brit/weapon

>>32792524
Existential dread.

Alri?

corn on the cob skewer

reported to GCHQ, shitlord

File: 2Cuktj4T.jpg (12KB, 400x300px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 400x300px

>>32792524
my tactical assault butterknife, its unregistered

Dentalign Orthodontics Marlow

File: frying-pan-skillet.jpg (36KB, 380x253px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 380x253px

the teflon coating rips through police vests with ease.

File: 105653_titanium_folding_spoon.jpg (55KB, 800x600px) Image search: [Google]

55KB, 800x600px

>>32792524
>his doesn't even fold up for easy concealment
Enjoy your 25 year sentence when they inevitably find that on you. Tactical all the way.

I am well versed in the art of cornetto-chi

my choice being mint

>>32792562
Reported you sick fuck.

>>32792576
>wanting a flimsy folding shit over a solid stock
enjoy dying in spoon fights when that piece of shit bends on you

>>32792546
>owning a spear
enjoy your raid

File: Vulcan2.jpg (12KB, 250x219px) Image search: [Google]

12KB, 250x219px

picked up one of these the other day, had to show my license
when the neighbours saw me taking it inside one of them fainted

>>32792779
No citizen needs an assault nerf gun, there is no reason you need a high capacity dart belt and a rapid firing automatic mechanism.

>>32792591
You've no fucking chance against a tactical Mivvi or an unlicensed 99 with sprinkles

>mfw a migrant.
Anything I want.

File: FEAST.jpg (24KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 500x500px

>>32792591
>>32792851
try saying that to one of these babies

>>32792890
Fucking wafer-piercing chocolate core. I'm sure that's illegal in warfare

I know this is a joke thread. But, seriously... Rate my gear.

>Barnett 150b compound hunting crossbow
>KBAR knife
>Gransfors hunting axe

That's my bedroom gear. I have various other "tools" in every room of the house including wrecking bars, sharpened steel poles, machetes etc.

I want apply for a shotgun certificate but I can't have police near my house as I grow certain plants inside.

File: Mars-Ice-Cream-140-calories-76g-fat-124g-sugar[1].jpg (36KB, 615x461px) Image search: [Google]

36KB, 615x461px

>>32792890
Fuck you. Stealth ice-cream incoming> The defences only see a harmless chocolate bar - then they unzip the wrapper

>>32792924
OH do fuck off, you little Rambo wanabee. I have knives, shotguns and rifles....so fucking what.

>>32792957
Can you elaborate on what it was I said that made you sperg out? I'm confused.

.22 bolt Bruno, .243 bolt blaser, 2x 12 ga Barrettas, jankey 410 pochers, xbow, bow, and nothing else illegal whatsoever.

>>32793085
Just read your post again
>....various "tools" in every room
Fucking fantasist. You live in the UK (as do I), not Mogadishu.

You don't sound stable enough to be trusted with an air rifle, never mind a shotgun. If I could find your address and doxx I'd send a copy of your post to your local Firearms licensing section. The trouble is you're probably so far immersed in your macho survivalist fantasy you will miss the point of this post.

Now you can rant back. I don't care and won' respond further.

>>32792524
A fucking bike wheel.

>>32792950
My god

>>32793129
You haven't understood this thread, have you? Nobody cares.

File: A12-TW452[1].jpg (66KB, 1000x1000px) Image search: [Google]

66KB, 1000x1000px

Ninja spork and spanner combination

File: f735723795fd26afb81017a14c08764a[1].jpg (48KB, 736x643px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 736x643px

Undetectable by metal scanners.

You can use the chopsticks to catch insects in flight and thus prevent mosquito bites

It must suck not living in the freest country in the world. Don't worry, President Trump will liberate you soon enough.

>>32793292
Ironically, that sort of liberation I can live without, thanks. Go order some bricks and cement on the US taxpayer

>>32793192
That looks like it would be awkward to use for any of its intended purpose....

>>32793307
Watch it m8 we have fully automatic spoons that have 300 scoops per second

File: 12097-6193-14725.jpg (106KB, 967x615px) Image search: [Google]

106KB, 967x615px

>>32793292
lmoa

File: fuck off.png (129KB, 441x353px) Image search: [Google]

129KB, 441x353px

>>32793344
Blow it out your ass, britbong.

>>32793333
But in the hands of a trained culinary warrior.........
>were this /b/ your quads would dominate the rest of this thread. I bet this guy
>>32792924
>is really excited

File: 1455807085131.jpg (26KB, 367x500px) Image search: [Google]

26KB, 367x500px

>>32793380
>fuck off.png

>>32792524
Oi I'll av u no I've got meself a knoife I av

>>32793404
Dick Van Dyke? Is that you?

>>32793401
lmao

>>32793143
Didn't you Brit fags once have the right to bear arms?
Lmao, shall be infringed apparently

>>32792537
underrated

>>32793433
>britain has a written constitution
americans

Why are brits called bongs?

>>32792537
/thread
Fucking kek

>>32793433
>Didn't you Brit fags once have the right to bear arms?
They started to curb that after WW1 when the government got shit scared about returning highly-trained and armed demobbed soldiers with no jobs.

You will find we tend to shot each other less, though, and I can walk through any UK city centre - I wouldn't do that in Detroit or Chicago

>>32793503
*shot =shoot
>my bluetoot keyboard genuinely needs rplacing

>>32793461
>2017
>still using a common law legal system
>no formalized rights to speak of
And you Brits have the gall to complain about how terrible your government is.

>>32792553

Oy, bin that ye cheeky cunt

>>32793461
English bill of rights
It's right in there
Enjoy getting stabbed to death by a paki, way better than being shot to death by a paki

>>32793503
Your country has one of the highest knife crime rates in Europe, and when you banned handguns your knife crime just rose lmao

>>32793211
How many licenses you need for this?

File: IMG_6919.jpg (27KB, 206x245px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 206x245px

>>32792861
I don't need a weapon to purge you from my green and pleasant land.

>>32793531
>English bill of rights
>An Act Declaring the Rights and Liberties of the Subject and Settling the Succession of the Crown.

Britain is a bad election year away from descending into V for Vendetta territory. Hopefully all you're packing is an emergency bag and passport.

>>32793531
I think I would rather be shot than stabbed

>>32793536
You need to understand the difference between correlation and causation. Your post implies the possession of hand guns suppressed knife crime - it didn't.

We do have young idiots think it's clever sticking each other with shivs, but as they're mostly chavs they can shank each other to their heart's content for me - no one of any importance is involved.

>>32793556
Then you're a fecking idiot - particularly by a shotgun.

Such an oozy corpse

>>32793538
Possession or whittle?

>>32793570
So explain that to me why after guns were banned and the crime rates with them dropped, the rate of stabbings increased

>>32793540
And I'm there is something along the lines of Protestants being able to own arms for their personal defence
You can't do that no more can you, gonna get nicked for avin a bike wheel ay lad?

>>32793616
OK. Two points.
1. It didn't
>Knife crime across England and Wales has risen for the first time in four years, official figures have revealed.
>Police recorded 26,370 offences in 2014/15, up from 25,974 the previous year - breaking a downward trend since 2010/11.
>The Office for National Statistics said the increase was "real" and was unlikely to be due to changes in police recording practices.
So it's been falling for 5 years and on rose in 2016. Handguns were banned in 1997.

2. As an ex-pistol owner, you couldn't walk around with a handgun in your pocket, so there were no legal guns "on the street". Access to and use of your weapons was strictly controlled and they had to be locked up (bolt, mags and ammo in a separate safe) unless being used at a licensed range. The weapon had to be secured in transit.

File: assault sticks.jpg (248KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

248KB, 500x375px

Can someone please help me, I found this cache of weapons in the woods and brought them home with me. How fucked am I?

>>32793672
called the police

>>32793630
>And I'm there is something along the lines of Protestants being able to own arms for their personal defence
That false. Northern Ireland is a special case,because of "the troubles" (partially funded by US sympathisers). There maybe a limited number of people in NI (on both sides) who are armed for their own protection, bu very few and details not publicised

>>32793685
Read the fucking bill you retard

>>32793664
(Cont)
Forgot to add - crime rates with hand guns didn't fall after the ban, as most gun crime was not committed with legally-held and licensed weapons. So banning the legal weapons did not affect the ones used committing the crimes.

The government was told this, but politicians of all stripes like to be seen to be "doing something".

>>32793696
Which bill?

>>32793723
The English bill of rights from the 17th century
You replaced it with some human rights bullshit act

>>32793664
How about from the late 90s to 2010, because as far as I recall seeing that it increased along with firearm related crimes

>>32793616

...the victims could no longer defend themselves with their guns?

>>32793760
No. Read this
>>32793664

>>32793753
Can't find any statistics, but my gut feel as a FAC holder was gun crime wasn't rising particularly. The changes to the laws cae due to mass shootings at Dunblaine and Hungerford

Can't comment about knives, though

File: Firearms.jpg (29KB, 248x386px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 248x386px

>>32793858
(cont0
found this

So pretty flat at around 3000 per year. This is all firearms offences, which would include possession, shooting, etc, etc

File: problematicgunargument.jpg (163KB, 725x725px) Image search: [Google]

163KB, 725x725px

>>32793570
>You need to understand the difference between correlation and causation. Your post implies the possession of hand guns suppressed knife crime - it didn't.

>>32793942
You are clearly hard of comprehension. If you read my posts again you'll see I was talking about handgun possession not affecting knife crime (in the UK only), pre and post handgun ban.

You can't compare UK and USA firearms effects as it's been decades, if not close to a century, since general carrying firearms for self-defence in the UK was legal

>>32794052
(Cont)
And your picture is factually incorrect. There isn't a total ban on firearms in he UK, as my gun cabinet can testify

Also, the statistics are deliberately chosen to be misleading

>First, it should be noted that the figures Swann gives are out of date: in 2010, according to the FBI, the reported rate of violent crime in the US was 403 incidents per 100,000 people–the 466 figure comes from 2007. Second, and more importantly, the FBI’s Uniform Crime Reports defines a “violent crime” as one of four specific offenses: murder and nonnegligent manslaughter, forcible rape, robbery, and aggravated assault.

>The British Home Office, by contrast, has a substantially different definition of violent crime. The British definition includes all “crimes against the person,” including simple assaults, all robberies, and all “sexual offenses,” as opposed to the FBI, which only counts aggravated assaults and “forcible rapes."
so it' apples vs oranges

Full read here
>http://blog.skepticallibertarian.com/2013/01/12/fact-checking-ben-swann-is-the-uk-really-5-times-more-violent-than-the-us/

>>32794168
(cont 2) They can't even get his name correct, never mind the facts. It's Piers Morgan, not Pierce

Or are these "alternative facts"?

>>32792524
Is this some sick reference to the opium wars?

STOP IT!!

>>32792537
Fpbp

Rocks in a sock, you cock.

Don't be a victim.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8OR0pRVxxLM

This is why you don't make a thread that invites tea niggers, even if it's meant to insult them. They are some of the dumbest people on the planet and I'm not just talking about gun laws. The only country that one ups them in shitposting and retardation is their formal penal colony of Australia.

Don't reply to them, don't engage them, don't fall for their bait. We fought a war to get rid of these faggots so there's not point inviting them back over.

>>32792524
Nothing because i am not in any danger ever

File: 27381088682_74e23343ca_c.jpg (348KB, 800x600px) Image search: [Google]

348KB, 800x600px

>>32794833
>Rocks in a sock
have you retards actually never heard of a "smiley"?

>tie bandana to padlock
>run the bandana through your belt loops so lock hangs at or is tucked under your belt buckle
>pull on lock to deploy

pic semi-related, he only looped the bandana through the lock

>>32794924
You're an asshat faggot. Got to work with someone. Can't do everything yourself.

>>32794967
I have guns. I don't need to beat idiots silly with blunt objects.

>>32794924
Get the fuck out of this thread then, you silly fat nigger

>>32794991
Never been in a fight have you, Tyrone

>>32795010
I have. A few. I knocked a "friend" out once with a simple punch to da ribs. It was interesting.

>>32795096
Bees knees chap

>>32794924
This is the sort of butthurt autism that makes people laugh at America, which isnt really fair on your non-spectrum countrymen

>Yanks literally have no sense of banter
What is it about North America that sucks away the ability to be self aware and makes you 100x more likely to be triggered?

>>32795119
Are you mental? North America is still yet to be "settled" in some area still. It is fascinating, to say the least. Brits be jelly, Texas is ready.

>>32795119
what is this 'banter'?
Can I get it with cheese?

>>32793470
Because Londoners don't have watches; they just listen to how many bongs Big Ben makes to tell the time

>>32795119
Not living next to many other countries which you learn to make fun of

A sense of nationalism that's easily butthurt

>>32795096
Is that a BB effort?

File: 20150827_155717.jpg (3MB, 5312x2988px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 5312x2988px

>>32795219
No real deal. Just a brit that escaped to the US.

File: lauren mayberry.jpg (103KB, 1024x768px) Image search: [Google]

103KB, 1024x768px

Cute girls.
Give me your best, Americlaps.

File: 200_s[1].gif (48KB, 388x200px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 388x200px

>>32792924
>>Barnett 150b compound hunting crossbow
>>KBAR knife
>>Gransfors hunting axe
>That's my bedroom gear. I have various other "tools" in every room of the house including wrecking bars, sharpened steel poles, machetes etc.

>shows up to a joke about cucked Britain thread
>posts cucked "weapons"
>wants ever so hard to be taken seriously

everyone point and laugh at this poor little britbong kid

>>32793570
>We do have young idiots think it's clever sticking each other with shivs, but as they're mostly chavs they can shank each other to their heart's content for me - no one of any importance is involved.

But that's also true about the gun-crime ridden areas of Chicago that you speak of.

>>32795308
Getting citizenship is so hard and arbitrary, this year I'm gunna Yolo it and just become and illegal and hopefully find a broad to marry.

UK is a sad place.

>went from being the greatest power on earth to not being able to even carry a knife in their countries
Seriously, what went wrong?

>>32795308
It's a ball ache to get in if you're not a beaner eh bong?

>>32793942
uk has no complete gun ban

File: 1485314307370.jpg (58KB, 750x565px) Image search: [Google]

58KB, 750x565px

G-guys,what can the bobbies do against this man?

File: Sad bong.png (186KB, 645x699px) Image search: [Google]

186KB, 645x699px

>Be British
>Getting home from work
>Can't because traffic is so fucking bad
>The city stops completely every hour to listen to the amount of bongs Big Ben makes because nobody wears watches
>Finally get home
>Can't open door
>Eviction notice in mailbox
>Bollocks.teabag
>"Dear Anon Buxtleberrybatch, you have failed to pay your TV Licensing and register your browser history, and all your possessions and property have hereby been suspended until your tithes have been paid to your local government"
>Have to walk to local licensing division
>Way faster than taking a car
>Send a friendly nod to some Chavs halfway there
>"U W0T M8?" They yell in unison. "U CHEEKY CUNT UL BASH YE FUGGIN 'EAD'IN, SWER ON ME MUM"
>Bugger.nigel
>They beat and stab you
>Try to fight back with a bottle of lube but you remember you'll get arrested if you defend yourself
>Bobbies come over and break up the Chavs
>Chavs tell Bobbies they self-identify as trans-arabic-ultraethnic-whatevers
>Bobbies don't arrest them because that would be racist
>Bellend.crumpet
>Call hospital because you got stabbed
>It's late now and the roads are finally clear(er), so the Ambulance gets there in time
>Get to overcrowded, understaffed, underfunded public hospital
>Get put on waiting list
>Get bored while bleeding out slowly
>Pull up 4chan with shaking fingers typing
>"B...e... Ame..r...i ..can"
>"G...et... Shot"

>>32795767
had to wait 2 years and and almost $2000 to get my green card. most of the cost was having a lawyer do the hard shit.

File: i say.jpg (27KB, 500x403px) Image search: [Google]

27KB, 500x403px

>>32795960

>>32795960
You seem upset

>>32795980
We're all gonna make it brah

File: How can bongistanis live.jpg (63KB, 871x350px) Image search: [Google]

63KB, 871x350px

>>32795991
>Be British politician
>Read 1984
>Tip top cheerio what a wonderful guide!

File: 8C3B6405-294C-4BED-9C9B-843F873E5FFF-1344-000001C113278522_tmp.jpg (30KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

30KB, 1280x720px

>>32795960

>be British Embassy worker
>Post an picture of a white house cake with sparklers in to coremorate 1812 on Twitter
>Americans proceed to get massively assravaged about a bit of banter

>>32792553
Oh shut you're carrying the newer space age poylmer model I see

>>32796102
Now that's cheeky.

>>32796050
You are upset then

>>32796145
Well, you're most likely British, which is measurably worse.

>>32796158
Than being an arseravaged nigger on a British banter thread who got upset when people mocked him?

Nah.

>>32793588
I've heard getting stabbed is much morr painful

File: Teaitnam flashback.png (143KB, 1336x3056px) Image search: [Google]

143KB, 1336x3056px

>>32796229
>*Sniff*
>B-b-bloody yanks! *Sniff sniff*
>Muh tea!

>>32796229

amerifats don't do banter, they're very serious people. lel

>>32795980
What was it under? Spousal?

File: BLOODY YANKS.png (294KB, 541x309px) Image search: [Google]

294KB, 541x309px

>>32796229
>>32796390
>"Americans banting back?! What buggery is this? HE MUST BE BLOODY MAD THEN, THE FAT CHAP."

>>32796303
You're a big guy