Well /k/ im anout to get a job as an unarmed security officer

quit before you start

>>32420201
Is this in Atlanta? Do you have a go pro and taser?

>>32420201
>unarmed security guard
lol bitch i'm a security monitor at that point.

this is what you'll be living

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7hFxcy40vk

>>32420248
beat me to it. didn't /b/ or /k/ try to help out Darion Long after he got fired and arrested?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TFxibEJxhw

Two words
>net gun

Why should i quit? Is it a super shit job?

>>32420318
It kinda is. I worked as a orderly in a psych ward AND in correctiona

After a while you just end being able to see trouble coming from a mile away but can't act on it until something actually happens. You pretty much just have a right butthole all day from anticipating problems.

Thos place seems pretty laid back though. Im more or less sketched out because one of my shifts would be at a parking garage thats known for break ins/drug activity

>>32420377
can you use a taser?

>>32420388
I can fire a handgun i think i could work a taser with some practice but for the time being no

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>>32420201

Other than police and border patrol, Security have some of the best stories.

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>>32420406

>>32420201
>hueueueuee
>look at dis crack doin he Paul blart shiet
>mah crew n I gonn git like fi teevees an som fons and dis niggga ain't gon do shit.

You're screwed friend.

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>>32420201
Forgot the pic

Did security for 4 years. Do it if you want a dead end job that will suck your soul

>>32420248
Back it up, back it up, back it up, back it up!
You betta
Back
It
Up

>>32420460
What was so bad about it? It seems like all you do is shoe away punks

>>32420406
>can't subdue a retarded kid
Wow, who's the real retard here?

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>>32420406
>>32420418

>MFW my partner and me tazed an autistic teen day before thankgsgiving
>Be me in a golf cart with my bud patrolling a shopping center
>Get a radio call from LP (Loss Prevention) calling for back up in the supermarket
>Enroute stand by
>We can hear a womans voice screaming to stop
>Run over to the meat and produce section
>See this longhaired sperglord smashing turkeys and humping one
>Hes just screaming and sperging the fuck out saying he hates thanksgiving
>Step forward
>HEY!!! THAT IS ENOUGH YOUNGMAN!!!
>He looks at me and just starts walking towards me screaming
>STEP BACK!!!
>"DON'T HURT HIM PLEASE! HE JUST NEEDS HIS MEDICINE!"
>Kid removes his pants and lunges at me fully bottomless and tries to bite me
>Trip and fall and hes ontop of me trying to bite me
>Partner grabs him by the hair and throws him
>Kid gets back up and lunges towards a little girl
>OH FUCK
>Gets ontop of the little girl and manages to nick her arm a bit
>Everyone runs at this point
>THATS IT!!!
>Grab the kid again whip out the taser
>CALM DOWN OR YOU'RE GOING TO GET ZAPPED!!!
>Hes making these weird scream noises like a wild animal while LP holds back his extremely distressed mother
>"DON'T KILL HIM!!!!"
>STOP RESISTING!!!!
>"ANON TASE HIM HES NOT CALMING DOWN I CAN'T GET THESE CUFFS ON HIM WITHOUT BREAKING HIS ARMS"
>Stick my taser near his asshole and just just start zapping the fuck out of him
>He keeps twitching and screaming louder
>STILL NOT CALMING DOWN HUH?
>Stick taser near is dick
>Tase again
>"UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHMMMMMMMMMUHHHHHHMHUHMUHMHUHMHMHHMHMHMHHMHMHM-"
>Passes out
>FINALLY!! Holy shit, that was worse than the black dude who tried to steal a bottle of Hennessy at least he gave up once we pulled out the taser
>His mother just melts to the floor crying and screaming say we killed her child
>"No mam hes fine"
>Paramedics arrive on scene
>Woman whos daughter was "Raped" by the autistic fuck

cont'd ending

>>32420594
Please, continue

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>>32420544

they're harder to take down than you think especially the really big ones from what I've heard.

>>32420594
>She agrees not to press charges in exchange the woman does not file a over use of force complaint against us
>"NO WHAT THEY DID WAS TOTALLY UNNECESSARY!!"
>Police review footage and did pin us for not detaining sperg from the start but ultimately back us because the kid went full indecent exposure to a child and touching her
>Spergs mom decides to go forward with her suit against us
>Meanwhile little girls mother goes with her suit against spergs mom
>Sperg is accused of rape and footage somewhat reveals it since his dick did touch the little girl and she even went as far as to say "His privates were touching mine"
>Sperg is hand cuffed to his gurney and police tell his mother hes under arrest for attempted rape
>Spergs mother flips the fuck out and faints
>"MY THANKSGIVING IS RUINED!!!!!"
>Meanwhile mother of the little girl says she'll testify on our behalf and she thanks us for being heros
>LP also backs us along with several customers
>MFW we're due in court after the New Year and company lawyer says its going to be an easy win.

>>32420671
>>32420594
This totally happened.

>>32420703

I think we were in the local news? I do remember hearing about an article in our local newspaper. But its a sensitive case since it does involve a teen and child.

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>>32420594
>>32420671
I believe you. Thanks for your time. Dudes like you make suburbia a safer place from all the wrangler free tards and their single mothers. Keep the stores safe.

>>32420740

If it was on the news then post an article dipshit, just saying "it was on the news" without any identifying information that could lead someone to the actual article isn't evidence that it happened. And a "sensitive case" doesn't limit the media's ability or desire to report it, the media reports on child abuse all the time, they just might not name names.

>>32420201
Put a gun in the crack of your asshole and don't tell anyone you have it?

:^)

>>32420434
Why aren't mag-staffs a thing?
Why are we not funding this?
I want to be a gun-wizard.

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>>32420201

>Work TSA
>Same ol same ol patting down and using the scanner searching people n shiz
>One boring afternoon it decided to get interesting
>See this middle aged Arab man who barely spoke English get in line to go to NYC in a long white gown/dress?
>Hello sir place your things here and step towards the scanner
>"I just going new york I can't go through this"
>Sir you have to go through the scanner or get a pat down
>He starts saying stuff in Arabic
>Fuck..
>"No I cannot I leave and go to different plane"
>Federal Marshal has been watching this whole time
>"Sir you're just going to leave your suitcase? Boys back me up."
>YES SIR!
>"I get new suitcase, leave me alone"
>"Sir put your hands behind your back"
>"Leave me alone!!"
>"SIR YOU'RE BEING DETAINED"
>Guy manages to scream out ALLA- before being taken to the ground
>Then this liquid substance starts pouring from his stomach
>THE FUCK!!?!?! EVERYBODY GET BACK NOW!!!!!!!!
>Marshal rips off his shirt and throws it
>Arab man just crying on the floor
>Wait a second....
>It smells like....
>It smells like....
>GOOD GOD ITS PEE!!!
>MFW Marshal popped his piss bag and the guy was just too insanely embarrassed about it

>>32420818
yeah wow tsa so great i fucking love harassing law abiding citizens

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>>32420818
HAHAHA POO POO PEE PEE XDDD

>>32420818
>Work TSA

And into the trash it goes

>>32420818
And one day you will give answer to Allah for your treatment of this brother

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>>32422090
>mfw popping Allah's piss bag too

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>>32420201
I speak to you an an anonymous poster to a creole cereal eating board who did security for 2 years.

the ONLY redeeming quality of my job was that I was armed and I worked out in the middle of no where at a warehouse (shipping company, trucks would come to use, load up and go do the deliveries)
it was a standard security gig, cruising around in a gold cart chasing away punk teenagers, vandals or occasional criminals from the buildings. It could be funny, spooky or mind numbing boring. you should have mace/baton or something on you anyway but unless youre armed youre not really security, you just a civilian getting bitch work and trust me, you want to have something for peace of mind with you.
Dont work in a mall either, some other guys worked at them and its like being in the ghettos ghetto. If you absolution need this job that god speed but if not I wouldnt do it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ph3Tauf__1Q

>>32422432
holy shit.....this is in america...

>>32420418
This sounds incredibly fake

>>32422506
yeah you should see atlanta or memphis, or E St. Louis, or basically any other black run city. they are shitholes. I worked in the hood in Orlando, Tampa, and Daytona and by god the worst was Orlando.

daytona was white people on meth chimping out,

Tampa was everyone chimping out, with white cuban girls with grat big jiggly titties slapping each other while drunk as fuck.

Orlando was the night of a thousand niggers. the shitty white parts were out in bithlo really. even those were just poor folks who took care of shit on their own.

This thread is turning out better than expected. I have just purchased a six d cell battery maglite on amazon.

Used to do mall security. Most of my stories are tame, it was a tougher job than you'd expect at times but the place itself was mostly quiet.

> Patrollan one day
> On duty cop from another town in full uniform, with shopping bags in hand, approaches with this hysterical Asian woman
> With a totally confused and disinterested tone he asks me to help her out cause he can't understand her, but he thinks it's something about a "kid locked in a car"
> Fucking what, it's like 90 degrees out today
> Follow this lady out to her car, ready to bust a window open
> Turns out she just locked her keys inside

Wew

Don't be a fucking tool.

You're not a cop, it's not your job to enforce the law.

Just accept your cool little security gig and don't fuck with people unless they're stealing or killing others.

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>>32420248
>THAS WHY YOU GAY
>THAS WHY YOU GAY
I'm conflicted between laughter, disgust, and pity

>>32420377
Ignore the drug deals, it's not worth getting shot over.

>>32422633
get a streamlight SL20 from ebay with the nicad battery and charger. thats the beatdown stick.

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i'm a security guard.

my workplace is like 60% women. whenever the bathroom tampon dispensers run out, i often have to unlock the janitor closet and retrieve more tampons.

i love it when a cute girl is forced to asked me for menstrual help and turns bright red from embarrassment.

>>32422506
Reminder: Detroit used to be the richest city in America.

>>32422506
Detroit is what happens when you pay niggers to sit around all day then pay them even more to have a bunch of kids. They take over, ruin everything, and eventually a once nice suburbia looks like the aftermath of a nuclear disaster.

>>32422432
all standing on the street ignoring cars. Thats a city that would benefit from a police men on every corner just beating the shit out of everyone breaking the law.

Reminds me of a video who someone whos living in Chicago explained that the derelict parts of the city wheren't just the outskirts, it was literally 5 minutes drive from the better parts of town.

>>32420485

These punks won't listen to you, and you can't do shit, or face jail time if you do. Considering you're a tough security officer, otherwise you'll get your ass beat or killed, the latter quite rarely.

>>32420248
h o l y s h i t

Actually feel horrible for this guy.

>>32423147

Well, whatever floats your boat.

>>32420201
be smart be armed

>>32423147
No wonder why Ubisoft makes such shit games, it has so many women on its workforce, all of whom look like they've never had a unique idea in their collective lives

>>32423633

Fuck off bootlicker

>>32422562
>with white cuban girls with grat big jiggly titties slapping each other while drunk as fuck.
Mmmm, I remember this.

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>>32420468
50,000 volts of back it up.

>>32420318
see
>>32420262
and
>>32420248
because that is what you will be dealing with most days

>>32423023
future leaders of america

>>32423633
baltimore is the same way. you can be in a decent neighborhood and after going five minutes down the street you can be somewhere you don't want to go at night or ever.

i don't understand why people stand in the middle of busy roads or walk out in front of traffic. always wanted to know why people do that.

>>32423636
yeah if he attacks people for no reason. op needs to carry a gopro everywhere and wait until the last possible minute before cracking skulls. you got to get evidence on video to justify your skull cracking.

>>32423147
group theory proven again. i don't think there's one hot chick in that whole pic

>>32424868
sounds like you need some police therapy too

>>32420248
that guy is a fucking legend
abcnews.go.com/US/mall-cop-turned-viral-sensation-doesnt-regret-tasering/story?id=21276078
>"You have to have courageous people like him, you know, step out and do these things," Dora Din-DuRant, a marketing director for a building in the area, told "20/20."
>Din-DuRant
you cant make that shit up

>>32422562
Some parts of Tampa are only distinguishable from Detroit by the presence of palm trees.

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>>32424934
op takes job, and
loses all hope the for the future
or prays for race war

>>32425079
Sounds like you need your family to be murdered by cops.

>>32420248
This type of shit is why im racist.

>>32420262
>Holds tazer sideways
I feel bad for this guy having to deal with so much shit but come on man.

>>32425351
>being racist
What's it like not having friends?

>>32425402
>Projecting this much

>>32425351
Okay

>>32423147
>2, may 3 blacks
>possibly 2 asians
>everyone else white
that's some diversity there alright

Post more tard stories.

>>32420248

3:30. Best goddamn thing ever. Shaneequa sleepy.

>>32420594

>zap
>zap
>zap
>zap

Taser or stun gun?

>>32420818

>Work TSA

Are you a morbidly obese African-American woman?

GoPro is a great idea for self-defense in court.

You can buy good used PR 24 batons reasonably. They are much better for blocking a knife than a Maglite.

>>32420377
>drug activity
NON VIOLENT
Jesus fuck
Also quit being a pussy, get a gun and carry it on you at all times.

Get an education or some talent so you don't have to be a fucking security guard in a mall for minimum wage
Are you a highschool dropout or something?

>>32420827
>suspiciously refuses to go through scanner
>"law abiding"
they weren't wrong in this situation

>>32425118
Oh fuck, that church burning was a false flag? I fucking called that shit.

>>32420262
This place looks like hell on earth.

>>32423551
Or ya know, it could be because one of the largest industries in the world was crated up and sent out of the country over the course of a couple decades. The niggers are just a side effect.

>>32427377

literally everyone called it.

>>32420318
Yes, only reasons people get security jobs is because they have nowhere else to go (aka, complete fucking mongoloids) or they're trying to get experience on their resume when they apply for an LEO job.

>>32427287
Nope. I was a carpenter building custom homes. Fell off a rock wall, fractured a vertibrae in muh spine and i cant lift beams, sheet roofs or hang sheetrock for my body's sake. Out of work and hey i took the first job that came to me that wasnt fast food or office work

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Just gonna keep bumping with shitposts

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posts of shit

>>32428040
Or unionization and the big 3 triopoly started killing the industry while the black riots in 67 killed it proper.

Detroit, E. St Louis, Flint, Baltimore are examples of dindu enrichment.

>>32420201
Careful with how you use that maglite. You got to keep in mind not only what your state's allows security guards to do but what company's policy is.

>>32427287
>drug activity
>NON VIOLENT
Pothead spotted. You're fucking retarded if people aren't going to beat the shit out of or even kill each other for money and drugs. Especially hard and expensive shit. It's safe to assume that if you're meeting a shady motherfucker in a parking garage, he's probably armed (as should you be) or has a gang backing him.