ITT: mall ninja shit

>>31985098
Hold up!

I heard it took a whole team of surgeons to sew up the wound?

>>31985867
I think it's bullshit, it'd be just another stab wound

>>31985087
I wonder how much DPS it does

>>31985910
Depends heavily on your agility stat

>>31985098
> $800+
>only function is stabbing, can't cut
>"it's the ultimate fighting knife guys! It takes a whole team of surgeons to see the wound"

This wins as the most mall ninja weapon ever.

>>>/k/arg/ in general

>>31986059
Cuts, except for extremely deep ones, are rarely lethal and occasionally incapacitating. Even moderate stabs can be lethal and very often incapacitating.

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>>31985867
dumbass, it takes a whole team of surgeons to sew up any proper sized knife wound, they're fucking nasty

>>31986278
Lurk more fag

What's wrong with getting weapons that look cool but are completely useless?

>>31986059
>>31986134
>>31986278

This. I have one decent story and one borderline hilarious one.

The decent story - a guy I worked with when I was working construction got stabbed in a night club. I don't remember the exact depth but I remember thinking that doesn't sound very deep (depending on the location, 2" or more will ruin your day and every day until the end of the universe). It took him what I felt was a pretty stupid period to recover, because hey, it's a stab wound to the abdomen, there aren't that many vital organs there. Turns out gut fauna or flora or whatever the proper name is getting anywhere but your gut really fucks you up.

The borderline hilarious one is stolen from my wife. She worked with a drama company for a while and a guy got stabbed with what turned out to not be a prop knife. Took, yep, an entire team of surgeons to stitch him back up.

>>31987522
>>31986278
>>31986059
>>31985867
>>31985098
I heard it takes a crane to get it out.

>>31985087
Go on a facebook knife/guns/weapons page.
You'll find enough pics to fill this thread ten times over.

>>31985087
That's not mall ninja, that's just straight up fantasy/sci fi nerd cutlery.

No one seriously thinks that sort of thing is useful in any sort of tactical situation, they buy them because looks cool. Basically dork coffee table conversation piece sculptures.

>>31985098
THIS is mall ninja shit.

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>>31987522
>guy got stabbed with what turned out to not be a prop knife

Fuckin' hilarious.

>>31985098
>>31986059
>>31987906
>>31988123
All these poor people.
Go buy a fucking gas station knife.

>>31987906
my hero

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All of cold steel's sword machetes

>>31985098

isn't this Bling, Dildo Faggins' sword?

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it's funnier when you know what this is...

>>31988412
Fuck you, their Chinese dadao machete is actually a sharp slab of metal just like the real thing and doesn't cost a hundred bucks.

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>>31988437
Circumcision knife?

>>31985098

Is that didlo on the left supposed to be a scabbard? What the fuck IS this thing?

>>31988509

$499 Steven Seagal Helmet Breaker
http://www.coldsteel.com/steven-seagal-helmet-breaker.html

>>31988437
I've been making swords for 47 years. You just don't understand the finer points of combat.

>>31988412

nothin personal

KEID

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>>31989357

>>31988372

Jesus Christ you better lose that trip. Fucking triggered

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>>31989464

>>31985910
I was poopin when I read this comment and it made me laugh a piece of shit out.