What would /k/ do during a zombie/infected apocolypse?

>>31779553
Masturbate. A lot.

>>31779553
ur mom lol

Act like a zombie and wait for uninfected women and rape them when I get the chance going ughuggguh. Then cum deep inside of them so then they get worried they are infected or is gonna have a zombie child

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>>31779553
Honestly, i'd hide like a pussy. Dying sucks.

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>>31779553
A, obviously.

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>>31779553
I never understood this whole "get a gun in a zombie apocalypse" thing. I mean ok, obviously it's good to have one but everyone acts as if it would be your primary mean of defense. But you will run out of ammo quickly, if you don't have a silencer it's loud as fuck, and a serious mechanical failure is bound to happen sooner or later, probably at the worst moment.

Edgy weapons aren't good either, because
a) they go dull after prolonged use
b) they might break (especially a katana if the user is a moron)
c) they are coated in zombie blood, you accidentally cut yourself with it it's game over.

Just take a homemade trench club /mace with a nice long handle for good reach. Simple, reliable, silent, doesn't need any maintenance, and it probably won't break if it's well made.

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
wat

rollerino

Jesus and I running around naked and stabbing people... pretty good

>>31779619
roll

>>31780306
Equipped with a 75¢ minature knife from the local Ace hardware store.

>>31779553

A. seems like the least autistic

>>31779619
First time rollan

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>>31779619
>bazooka above rifle
>ancient warrior above solider
And this >>31779646
Someone make a /k/ approved edit please.

roll

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>>31779553
Find my waifu

>>31780510

>dual berettas as secondary weapons
>least autistic

top kek

>>31779553
All of these are bad, but A has to be the be the best.

>>31779619
Roll cuz dying ain't that bad

>>31779553
A. The shotgun will feed me and help defend me and if I blow though a tube in a firefight I'll have one gun and a New York reload ready. The machete helps with fabrication.

>>31779646
>relying on melee as primary defense
guess who likes being covered in infected blood
also
>smashing a head with a club
>silent

>>31780549
You don't have to use both of them at once, its an extra gun.

>>31780573
Oh and the grenade will help with anyone smart enough to dig into a fox hole, yet dumb enough to not also dig a grenade pit.

>>31780576
Compared to a gunshot anon

>>31780576
Makes a fuck load less noise than a deafening BANG that can be heard for possibly miles with good conditions

>>31779619
roll

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>>31779619
ROLLIN

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>>31780549
> Dual Berettas
> Implying they're autistic
Nice meme

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
roll

>>31780755
aw hell yeah

>>31779619
Rolling

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
rolling for keks

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>>31779553

>>31779646
If it's an actual infectious disease, you can pretty much consider yourself fucked and in need of being quarantined if you get any bodily fluid on you.

So it's pretty much don't let them get that close in the first place.

I can tell you as a med resident that that club is going to splatter blood and shit all over the place.

Anything that breaks the skull can and will make a fucking mess too.

>>31779619
Rollin

>weapons
>no supplies
>no plans

Yeah. You morons will be deader than a door nail within a week.

As for me, I have my elaborate zombie costume so I can get all the zombie pussy I want.

>>31780725
>rifle - 35
>a cat - 10
>motorcycle - 25
>football armor - 20
>total - 90

Huh...would think I'd do fine with a bike and rifle.

>>31779619
Roll

I'd take B.

More weapons can be acquired along the way.

>>31779619
fuggit

>>31780947
>RPG
>random guido
>monster truck
>ghillie suit
>50+20+35+35=140% chance of survival
yay

>>31779619
Rolling xD

>>31780867
Yeah, it's pretty stupid a rifle should be more points

>>31780533

>>31779619
Meme roll 4 kickz

>>31779553
>SPAS
>40mm launcher
>M249
>grenades
>claymores
Where do you expect to obtain these? Unless you're holding out for the zombocalypse as a member of the Los Zetas cartel in Mexico, I'm pretty sure you're not gonna be playing with any of these toys as a civilian.

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>>31780549

>>31779619

Here we go, dubs please!

>>31779619
never seen this, rollin

>>31779619
Time to arm up

>>31781189
flying in my chopper, shotgun Jesus on gunner, full riot gear, with my trusty dildo by my side, cant lose

>>31779619
Aright then I guess I'm on this rollercoaster also.

Rolling.

>>31779619
Rolling for the minibike

>>31781281
>combat knife
>jesus christ as a sidekick
>skateboard as a vehicle
>wife beater + jeans

Holy fucking kek my sides. sounds like a pretty good movie

>>31779619
Rollin out

>>31779619
Rolo

>>31779619
Rolling

>>31779619
I'm going to survive

>>31781294
>Combat knife, dinosaur, kart, WW II uniform
>105% chance of survival
FUCK YEAH

>>31779619
TIem to roll

>>31779619
Re rolo

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>>31779553

I would use a baseball bat, wrapped in barbed wire.

I would name it "Lucile", and use it to beat in the head of Abraham and Glenn.

>>31779619
"rollin rollin rollin rollin" - Fred Durst

>>31779619
Bleg

>>31779619
Rollerino

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>>31781359
>discount Governor

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
Rolling to die.

>>31779553
Run A, but give the second beretta to somebody else.

>>31779553
Lock my door and wait until they all rotted away.

>>31779646
firearms are super effective, so much so that a "zombie apocalypse" would be put down swiftly and effectively.

It would be like the best hunting trip in the world, but the animals are all dumb, slow, and tend to walk straight toward you.

Don't believe the TV, we have enough ammo to kill the entire country twice over.

>>31779553
A

>>31779619
this chart is wrong on many levels

>>31779646
>silent
quieter maybe

>>31780866
Is it necrophilia?
Is it rape?

what is the viability of bows and arrows in the zombie apocalypse? i think ammo would be a huge issue but making low quality bows can''t be the most difficult thing in the world nor would a atlatl or spear

>>31779619
rollo

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
Stupidest thing all day.. So roll

>>31781620
>firearms are super effective

depends on the type of Z really. in a TwD world, your best primary would be a rifle, an Ak, SKS, a Mosin with a spike bayonet deployed at all times. When you see a Z, you stab it in the eye. You would never want to shoot Zs because the sound would only atract more of them and potentially people. People is who'd you'd fight with your rifle. WWZ Zs are a different animal.

>>31779619
Rollin

>>31779619
rolo

>>31779619
rolling for it

>>31779619
roll

>>31779553
I'd take b. It would get me some good long range food, have close range support and I could look like a great ultraweeb.

>>31779619
Let's see if I get slapped with that thread derail ban.

>>31780601
>>31780595
silent != quieter
i know, i'm nitpicking

>>31779619
wimmy wham wham wozzle

>>31781775
Bitching

>>31779553
Which one is in .45 ACP with a suppressor?

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>>31781620
I mostly agree.

I don't think the zombie apocalypse would go off anymore. Sure lots of unarmed sheep yadda yadda.... but too many dudes have a vaguely workable plan where they would get a healthy positive K:D ratio for things to really get rolling.

The biggest reason the zombie apocalypse is a no-go is the military.

Every zombie scenario is predicated upon one thing: the military being unable to stop it. This is almost always due to an ignorance of how to fight and a mismanagement by leadership on the best way to approach.

The Walking Dead etc etc has made this a non-issue. You know who's really good at Nazi Zombies? Every single Lance Corporal.

If the zombies rose tomorrow the infantry would get called for a brief like "shoot them in the head save ammo" and the grunts would be like "yeah I know let's party.

They would form up like a very crowded day at the rifle range and just fucking rain down.

>>31779619
rolling

>>31781820
Reminds me of the Arma 3 zombies vids on youtube.

They had to make the zombies super fast and able to jump like 100 meters in the air for it to be even a challenge for the guys in the trench/foxhole.

>>31779619
rawl

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>>31779553

>>31781879
>flammenwerfer
>ancient warrior
>helicopter
>full football armor

145% chance of surviving, i'll be fine

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779553
Make a zombie harem.

>>31782114
I am prepared.

>>31779619
roll

>>31782037
Does the launcher shoot pocket knives?

>>31782159
So basically an invisible dildo in a chopper with a soldier by my side? Great

>>31780692
M9s are autistic, I got this off of fagbook.

>>31779619
Rick Rollin.

>>31779619
les do dis

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>>31782186

>>31782161
razor blades

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>>31782387
Fuck yeah

>>31779619
wew

>>31779619
ROLO

>>31779619
hmu

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>>31779619
Rolling

>>31779619
Whoop

>>31779619
ayyy

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
nigroll

>>31779619
Fuck mods Im rolling

>>31779619
Ka chow

>>31779619
rawl

>>31779619
Rolling

>>31779619
Roll

>>31780536
Ya know I got curious and now I regret it.

>>31779619
Rol

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
r

>>31779619
heh

>>31779619
rululuollnin

>>31779619
roller blade

>>31779553

probably try and make my way to the dessert, I get the feeling it's not a very zombie friendly environment

>>31779619

rolling

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779646

A spear is best. You can poke at long ranges and not get blood on you.

>>31779619
>>31779619
f

>>31779619
Rolla

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
rolll

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
.

>>31779619
roll-oll

>>31779619
Rrrrolll

>>31779619
rolllll

>>31779619
Rollan

>>31779619
Roland

>>31779619
Benis

>>31783852
Nice me and my soldier sidekick can ride tandem on my bike while doing flamenwerfer 41 drivebys in WW2 uniforms. Please let this become reality

>>31779619
uh roll

>>31779619
rooooll

>>31784222
not bad

>>31779619
rollerino

>>31779619
rollan

>>31779619
Rollan

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>>31779619
Rollin

>>31779619
Swiggedy Swooty

>>31779619
rawhide

>>31779619
ROLLAND

>>31779619
roll

>>31780536
pls be my zombie gf

>>31779619
Fuck

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>>31779619
rawlins

>>31779619
roll

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>>31779619
OHHH BOI

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>>31779619
Keep rolling rolling rolling.

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
>Garunteed replies

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
rollnin

>>31779619
roll

rollerino

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
Rollan Rollan

>>31779619
Rollan

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
roll

>>31780536
I am not proud of this boner.

>>31779619
Rollan

>>31779619
Rollerino duperino booperiono

>>31779619
breagwarg

>>31779619
Rollan

>>31779619
beef

>>31779619
Let's roll this already

>>31779619

Rollski!

>>31779619
Rollan

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>>31784748

Wow. 145% chance of survival. I like those odds!

>>31779619
cuckforce

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>>31779619
rollin'

>>31779619
Dhrill

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
Rawling

>>31784826
110% chance of survival wielding a flamethrower, wearing a firefighter suit, driving a car and I have my sweet kitter as a buddy
I'm pretty fortunate

>>31779619
Roll.

>>31779619
Rollin'

>>31779619
Rolling

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>>31782841
>>31784334
>>31784545
Must be cold. But the more you work it then it gets warmer.

>>31779619
Go time

>>31779619

Rollan'

>>31784879
Hurt me more, Snake..

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>>31779619

>>31779619
rolling

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>>31784879

>>31784879
>>31780536
Sauce? Google ain't giving me shit.

>>31779619
Rollllllling

>>31779619
Rull

>>31779619
blank space

>>31779619 >>31779818 >>31779864 >>31780254 >>31780280 >>31780306 >>31780310 >>31780523 >>31780567 >>31780602 >>31780672 >>31780725 >>31780755 >>31780767 >>31780776 >>31780787 >>31780799 >>31780826 >>31780867 >>31780890 >>31780947 >>31780971 >>31780980 >>31781068 >>31781173 >>31781189 >>31781194 >>31781246 >>31781281 >>31781294 >>31781303 >>31781311 >>31781312 >>31781316 >>31781319 >>31781320 >>31781323 >>31781332 >>31781404 >>31781409 >>31781462 >>31781500 >>31781531 >>31781704 >>31781711 >>31781720 >>31781729 >>31781743 >>31781745 >>31781746 >>31781775 >>31781807 >>31781879 >>31781966 >>31782052 >>31782081 >>31782159 >>31782174 >>31782207 >>31782223 >>31782568 >>31782618 >>31782632 >>31782641 >>31782651 >>31782670 >>31782681 >>31782683 >>31782686 >>31782693 >>31782720 >>31782727 >>31782776 >>31782789 >>31782861 >>31782891 >>31782958 >>31783081 >>31783181 >>31783253 >>31783293 >>31783421 >>31783551 >>31783556 >>31783594 >>31783605 >>31783611 >>31783621 >>31783699 >>31783736 >>31783737 >>31783768 >>31783813 >>31783825 >>31783852 >>31783872 >>31783880 >>31784222 >>31784227 >>31784232 >>31784237 >>31784243 >>31784254 >>31784260 >>31784268 >>31784280 >>31784286 >>31784340 >>31784343 >>31784346 >>31784370 >>31784374 >>31784377 >>31784433 >>31784460 >>31784465 >>31784507 >>31784510 >>31784511 >>31784532 >>31784540 >>31784541 >>31784569 >>31784572 >>31784602 >>31784614 >>31784660 >>31784661 >>31784748 >>31784753
>>31784754 >>31784758 >>31784826 >>31784839 >>31784849
>>31784854 >>31784855 >>31784864 >>31784868 >>31784876
>>31784883 >>31784913 >>31784938 >>31784966 >>31785259 >>31785260 >>31785284
ALL of you are derailing faggots.
The chart isn't even good.

>>31779619
nigger

>>31785387
Ah, poor little thing, did nobody want to play along without your tired old bullshit?

>>31785387
So is the zombie craze. Literally everything else is better.

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
k

>>31779619
Rollin

>>31779619
it must be nice to get so many (You)s

>>31779619
euh

>>31779553
>no break-action shotguns
>no axes
>no revolvers
are you trying to have us die in a week into the end?

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
fuck oiy

>>31779619
Autobots, roll out

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
Gimmie

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
rolling shitpostin

>>31779619
rol

>>31779619
Holy shit that's a lot of replies

>>31779619
Rolllll

>>31779619
Rolling .

>>31786704
Holy shit I'm fucked.

>>31779619
rooooolllliinnnnnn

>>31779619
Kept you waitng, Huh

>>31779619
Roll.

>>31779619
rolol

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>>31786667
This is legitimately the best roll

>>31781820
> You know who's really good at Nazi Zombies? Every single Lance Corporal.
Kek

>>31779619
rollan

>>31779553
i'd use all the sten mk2's in this thread

>>31779619
Be a serb

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>>31779619
rollin

>>31779619
What a succes

>>31779619
rawl

>>31779553
B is quite good, long range rifle to hunt deers, a quite good smg, claymores are fucking good to defend a position (I assume a fellow soldier gave them to me as he was dying in my arms, asking me to go tell Maria he loved her).

You can keep the katana.

>>31780536
>>31784879

https://nhentai.net/g/140915/

>>31779619

rolling for dildo carry

>>31779553
A and E are most practical. both have relatively practical melee weapons, but E is probably more useful because a full jerry can is doubtlessly more helpful than one or a few grenades. C would be an even more practical primary weapon, but the deagle and gold club ruin it.

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Im not even /k/ but this is would I do in a zombie apocalypsis
I mean they are slow as fuck how threating could they be?
>inb4 runners
Fuckers can't run marathon-tier before being infected how long until they tear they tendons away from excesive exercise

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
rollita

>>31779619
rolling

>>31779646
Other living people have guns and will use them to kill you and take your home made butt plug.

>>31779619
ROLLLLLLL

>>31786974
That's assuming zombies would be the only ones that want to kill you.

>>31779619
Rock and roll.

>>31779619
rollin

>>31779619
Ruling

>>31779619
ROLL

>>31787432
I got katana dog bycycle and a invisible coat, nice

>>31779619
rolling.

>>31787461
95% chances of surviving

>>31779619
Roll

>>31787470
Weapon - 4
>katana
Sidekick - 7
>ancient warrior
Vehicle - 0
>wooden horse
Protection - 1
>wife beater and jeans

I'm fucked.

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>>31779619
Rollin

>>31779619
rollan

>>31779619
Rawlio

>>31779619
roll

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>>31779619

>>31779619
ro-ro-ro-rollan

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
rolling

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
rollaids

>>31779619
Shollambo

>>31779619
lets try it

>>31779619
Oh boy i hope I get a good one

>>31779619
niigerroll

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
reyughij

>>31779589
Let's break down the choices
>A
I'd choose this one because SPAS12 makes my dick hard, I shoot a lot of trap, and I own a kukri. Sadly, it's probably objectively the worst choice on this list. SPAS is an overly complicated, heavy mess that I hear malfunctions not infrequently. Dual berretas seem like one of the better sidearm choices, though, and the grenade seems like a nice anti horde pick
>B
Clearly the scout/sniper pick. Rifle is great for safely picking off wandering threats, but good luck landing headshots from anywhere that the zombies wont see you. Silenced mp5 is swarm deterrent and definitely the best sidearm, probably would use it more than the rifle. You could probably lure zombies into the claymore, or set it up to keep you're sniping spot protected. Katana isnt worth the weight, doesnt play to the kit's strengths.
>C
/k/ probably picks this one because it's an M4. Pros: Hands down best primary. Cons: worst sidearm and third worst melee. It doesnt matter how big a bullet you use if we assume one headshot is all you need. Ammo rarity and weight make the deagle the absolute worst sidearm. Golf club is meant for whacking gold balls, you use it for heads and it's going to bend and brake before the other choices. The length and shape will ensure you get at least one kill, though. Molotov is a wildcard, play with fire at your own risk.

>>31789258
Cont.
>D
The defense choice. Use the smoke grenade to signal your rescuers or other survivors. You could hold any building pretty well with a SAW, but it's the heaviest choice. You could kill up to 100 zombies before reloading. Have fun belting any ammo you find so it can feed in your gun, though. 1911 is a weaker choice when compared to the other options, but it will do in a pinch. Never underestimate the effectiveness of a bat.
>E
Better bring tons of ammo, because once you run out this kit is TRASH. Ak74 is on par with the m4 from earlier, and the mini uzi is the second best choice since it's practically a primary weapon. Chainsaw is hands down the worst choice on this list, and since the throwable is more fuel you're down to two weapons and one utility for starting fires. You could use the chainsaw as intended in rural areas, but otherwise you better leave it behind.

>>31779619
giant negro anus

>>31779619
rollin

>>31779619
Roland

>>31779619
Gee wiz!

>>31779619
Thomas Rowls

>>31779619
Rolland

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
Rollin

>>31779619
Let's see.

>>31779619
Rollypolly

>>31779619
Roll

>>31779619
Rollers

>>31779619
rollan

>>31779619
roll

Rolf

>>31779619
that's a lot of (you)'s

>>31779553
(D.) all the way, but if ammo conversation was an issue would go with (E.)

>>31779619
Rolling

>>31779619
ayyy thread derail rolling

>>31779619
k

>>31779619
Jesus

>>31779619
Let's do it!

>>31779619
Am I gonna make it in a zomb apoc?

>>31779619
rollerino

>>31779619
gibe

>>31779619
add me to the meme too

>>31791499
Survival chance 190%

rolling with a shitty dubs strength katana and A dinosaur in an Apache.

Sounds like a bad trip

>>31779553

roll

>>31779619
henry rollins

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>>31779553
Keep quiet and off the radar as much as possible.

Make use of all the canned food and stored water.

Doubt such a situation IRL would last that long, maybe a few weeks before before major cities were nuked.

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>>31779619
roll

>>31779619

Rolling

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>>31781820
>You know who's really good at Nazi Zombies? Every single Lance Corporal.

LOST

>>31779619
rolllllll

>>31791739
Who does these comics?

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
mmkay

>>31779619
Thats a lot of replies you got there

>>31779619
rollin

>>31779619
Tryin my luck

>>31779619
roll

>>31779619
rolly

>>31779619
roll