Armystories-thread?

>>31660776
Whats your position (aka what do you do)?

Are you happy that you ended up in the air force?

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>>31660835
I'm NASAMs artillerist. Aka Surface to Air Missile. Boot camp just finished so I'm flying back up to base to get into actual service. I am a Flysoldat. It is the same as Private First Class, but I'm striving to become Vingsoldat. Aka Vice-Corporal.

I wanted to join the navy first since the harbour is in my hometown, Bergen. But the recruiting officer said that someone with my, appearent skills, would fit to be an artillerist rather than a sailorboy. So yes. Really enjoying it.

>>31660890
Nice, I was air force security during basic, I actually considered joining the AA at first.

Never made it past private.

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I'll start.

>Out on field practice
>Primus needs fuel
>Sgt tells me to bring the jerrycans
>Sure.jpg
>Hmm these are lighter than usual
>Empty fuuuuuuck
>Tells me to drag my ass down to supply guys for a refill
>He asks for another volunteer to help me
>Silence
>He picks out the lazy piece of shit that always complains
>At supply truck
>Can't find filter for the cans
>Private Lazyfuck tells me I don't need help and fucks off
>One of the officers that are in supply tells me to hold my hands over my ears while some guy is on the phone
>K.
>He goes behind the truck
>BANG MOTHERFUCKER BANG
>Loud BANG from nowhere
>I look confused at the officer while he shrugs and smiles
>Hear a clunk
>Gas grenade at my boots
>Swooooooooooosh.gif
>Smoke coming out
>I inhale half a whisper and nearly choke
>Pick up the cans and sorint 50 meters away and clumsily put my gasmask on and sprint to my position
>Some stupid chink is in my sector
>WTF STUPID GOOK GTFO MY SECTOR
>Sarge comes up and yells at me for being in the wrong sector
>When did the fucking defense lines and sectors change, niggah?
>Run to my new sector
>Lay down with cans as rifle support expecting an attack
>Where is Lazyfuck?
>He comes 5 minutes late and gets assblasted by the sarge because he was supposed to be with me

The rest of the week was just a few camp ambushes and terry-killing while the MRE-shits were hitting hard. 10/10 would do again.

>>31660972
I like AA. Its the perfect combination of being an infantryman, but still being an important enough asset not to be a grunt.

>>31661275
Faen så bitter over at jeg ikke kunne joine. Militæret virker som en god kombo av "Faen jeg hater det her/Faen jeg elsker det her" livsstil :V

>>31661329
De forste ukene er verst. Men etter det får du deg venner og blir vamdt til livsstilen og vaske rommet og gangen hver morgen. Det er ikke for alle, men hvis du er vandt til å traske i naturen hele dagen lang og å ta deg godt ut for offiserene, så ville du ha elsket det.

Men for de fleste så er militæret noe som de gjor for å vise at "KVINNER ER LIKE STERKE SOM MENN" eller noe sånt liknende.

Mesteparten av jentene har fotverk fra marsjingen/ryggskader i tillegg. Men de har ihvertfall noe de kan poste av seg selv på FB.

>>31661329
Henrik, da

>>31660776
>Armystories-thread?
profftips, you're not in the army

might as well get the terminology right when you're gonna work in a military organization

>>31660776
Story passed on from friend who joined marines

>be inna mess hall, recruits at basic opening mail
>one marine opens a package
>it's a dragon dildo
him and recruits with him are losing their shit
>drill sergeant investigates racket
>"put it in your mouth" he says
>lolwut
>you heard me recruit, put it in your mouth or this entire unit's doing another drill
>entire mess hall worth of recruits now half demanding half begging him to do it with giggly overtones
>"put it in your mouth son"
>recruit with dragon dildo is sweating, "I don't wanna, I don't wanna! no!"
>eventually he give in, screams "MARINE CORE!" and jams it in his mouth
>mess hall erupts into laughter, men on the floor crying laughing
>sarge smiles, nods and walks off

>>31661329
Noen får bare hat, hat og hat gjennom hele tjenesten, andre har den beste opplevelsen i sitt liv. Det er litt som å kaste terning, og se hvor du havner hen, hvem som er befal og hva slags jobb du får.
Noen er skikkelig glade for å ha vært med, andre er bitre og er bare glade for å være ute.

>>31661393
Jeg ville for opplevelsen og for at jeg vil tjene landet mitt. "naivt" vil noen si, men ærligt.

En stygg kneskade et halvt år for innrykk kjorte den drommen i rævva. Flere år med hard trening, rett i dass.

>>31661448
How about you stop being so fucking high on your termi-fuckingnoonecares-nology and leave this thread if you got nothing to contribute eh?

>>31661481
Ser den. Tror og de som har urealistiske forventninger er de som ikke takler det så bra.

Har selv 2 brodre m.fl som har vært inne, og blitt godt fortalt om "Det var helt jævlig surt, og jeg savner det!"-psykosen av positiv militær opplevelse :P

>Canuck
>9 Years in the military
>They paid for my school
>Served in afghanstain
>Now I'm a Paramedic

All in all no complaints they treated me well helped me become a man

>>31661515
lol breh, if you think I'm anal about terminology just wait until the instructors get a hold of you

at least where I served, you would get chewed out for calling the air force the army or vica versa, you better get use to learning terminology

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>>31661544
Same. They will pay for my education as a security guard and I also get paid for just being here lol

>>31661554
I just mentioned armystories. I never said that I was going to tell you a story from when I served in the army while I was actually in the airforce...

>>31661564
You need to go to school to be a security guard?

Jeezez fuck you norfags is giving me cancer... Posting shitty stories and speaking Norwegian.. This is /k/ not fucking b where you can spout random shit.. Amober.

>>31661638
If that's what he's talking about, it will have to take a course that takes a while and costs a few thousand, especially if going for lvl-3. Talking private security guards, guys who do everything from patrolling the mall (lvl-1) to CIT (lvl-3).

>>31661638
no he doesn't, it's just a quick course

>>31661730
>takes a while
it's just 95 hours to get all 3 levels

>>31661746
116 hours, spread over a minimum of 18 days total, not counting waiting periods in between etc.
Yes.

>become officer
>be officer
>get paid to study
>get paid to do nothing
>will get even more pay when I'm done here
life is okay, I guess

>>31660776
They only conscript you guys for a year?
That seems like a wash if you aren't forced into a reserve component. Yeah I get signing on after the year, but all it would take is a booming economy to fuck your military over hard as almost everyone follows the money.

>>31661480
Not responding "Sgt. I need a proper demonstration to perform my order satisfactory"

>>31661700
Ur welcome

>>31661794
you can call a security guard course an education if you wish, but there is a huge difference between sponsoring your guard course, and someone paying for a proper education that lasts 3-5 years.

>>31660776
I was a loader on a strv 102R in the 80s. Once we had a urban combat exercise and early in the morning we were waiting in an alley for orders and then we see a worker coming home from a night shift, we were turned out and i was on the mg. We see a drunk fucker go and disturb him and be an asshole when this giy wanted to just go home, our commander orders the driver to cold start the engine and advance 5 meters, then he just tells me, "soldat anon, avsäkra ksp riktning alkisen" then he ordered me to fire a 10 round burst blank fire and you should have seen the drunkard try to run lol. Funniest shit ever. We do a 180 and go back fast as fuck, doing 180s was forbidden because you fucked the tarmac so after this our whole regiment was forbidden from doing urban shit in actual cities lol, ofc they never figured out it was our tank that did it

>>31662067
They pay for your exams if you wish to retake them, but University education is free here and you get some study points for only being in the Army.

>>31662087
Badass. How's the Swedish conscription system nowadays tho? Heard it has become overly selective and very few get in?

Did my conscript service 5 years ago in the Border Guards, first bunch of new recruits that were introduced to the 416 after we changed from the G3`s. Had a sergeant demonstrating field maintenance during winter, who managed to drop the bolt in the snow, forcing us retards to look for it.
Wintertime up north was nice, summer was just shit and mosquitos and angry locals.
A notorious guy that hated the military lived in our AO near the river dividing Norway and Russia, which we kept patrolling. That fucker would wear one of those aluminium rescue blankets and yell from his property that we could go fuck ourselves, trying to mess his mind up with our radios and radars.

If you went to the closest city up there to drink and have a good time, no one wanted to talk with the girls, since we were informed there were a tranny out on town, looking for young conscript dick to suck. She supposedly collected their dog-tags in a jar in her apartment.
Fuckings Finmark.

>>31662137
All bases have their fair share of weirdos in the vicinity. We have one as well. A biker called "Storulv" that cruises around town in his minivan, trying to trigger a fight with recruits. He even stitched his name to all his clothes and the intimidating suitcase he always has with him.

>>31662124
Its volounteer

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>>31662252
>intimidating suitcase

Requesting clarification on this, Anon.