Humor thread, Nugget Enterprise edition

Thread replies: 24
Thread images: 10

Anonymous
Humor thread, Nugget Enterprise edition 2016-08-24 02:14:57 Post No. 31087202
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Humor thread, Nugget Enterprise edition Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:14:57 Post No. 31087202 [Report]

> be me
> bad neighborhood because Jamal moved next door
> dindu killed by police on news
> chimp-out level III
> call nugget enterprise
> "da"
> "umm yeah there are some rioters in my ne-"
> cut off by belch
> can almost smell the vodka through the phone
> "we come, you hide" CLICK
> well i'm dead
> 20min later the sound of a swarm of backfiring and sputtering hatchbacks echos the houses, followed by the sounds of cannons and lights brighter then the sun
> 2 hours later a stalker knocks on my door
> the streets are filled with body parts, 7.62x54R casings, broken vodka bottles, and bayonets
> the milsurpmen are all carring nuggets, or obrezs
> he hands me a crumpled envelope
> they all pack in to the slav machines and hobble away
> mfw i see bodies neatly stacked around the roads
> mfw the bill was only 1,200 rubles and two track suits
> mfw I found a leftover case of nuggets
10/10 would call again

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:16:53 Post No.31087230
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:16:53 Post No.31087230 [Report]

>dindu
>chimp-out

anon take your racist humor to >>>/pol/

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:20:47 Post No.31087288
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:20:47 Post No.31087288 [Report]

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>>31087230
Someone put the female in you, boi. Must be one of them new fancy social justice wussies.
Back in my day we used to stack hippies and gooks like you for sandbags.

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:27:25 Post No.31087378
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:27:25 Post No.31087378 [Report]

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>>31087202
>>31087288
This is next level cringe.

Please, for the love of God, stop posting.

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:32:07 Post No.31087449
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:32:07 Post No.31087449 [Report]

Fucking grow up you manchild

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:32:12 Post No.31087451
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:32:12 Post No.31087451 [Report]

>>31087230
Shut your cum loving whore mouth.
Also: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER WELCOME TO 4CHAN

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:36:43 Post No.31087497
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:36:43 Post No.31087497 [Report]

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>>31087230
Pls /pol/lack stop trying to pretend you are not one!!!!

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:38:35 Post No.31087516
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:38:35 Post No.31087516 [Report]

This is one of the worst threads I have ever seen on /k/ in the five years I've been here.

Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:40:35 Post No.31087532
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 02:40:35 Post No.31087532 [Report]

>>31087516
Yeah. A bunch of guys from the last humor thread had a bunch of funny nugget enterprise stories and said we should make a dedicated thread. I came back 5 minutes after starting it and well i'm ashamed

Anonymous 2016-08-24 03:25:23 Post No.31087962
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 03:25:23 Post No.31087962 [Report]

>>31087532
This is not the quality work I've come to expect from nugget enterprises.

>>31087497
President Nixon/10

Anonymous 2016-08-24 03:30:33 Post No.31088018
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 03:30:33 Post No.31088018 [Report]

>>31087202
This is a fucking awful attempt at the original story. Kill yourself.

Anonymous 2016-08-24 03:38:17 Post No.31088086
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 03:38:17 Post No.31088086 [Report]

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>be me, in Bongistan
>"""refugee""" troubles
>dial up Nugget Security's "Fuck the Queen" branch
>"ELLO, MATE. WHIT CAN AE DO FAIR YEH?
>Well, I'm having some problems with my new neighbors and-
>"SAY NAE MAIR. WE'LL BE THAR 'BOUT TEATIME TAEMARRAH."
>answer a brisk knock on the door next day
>a wealthy-looking, well-dressed fellow with an H&H double-barrel shotgun is there
>a mob behind him with knives and cricket bats
>"Good day, chap! You rang about those Arabic gentlemen, yes? Fear nothing! Head on in and we'll take care of it, friend!"
>bobbies show up
>arrest everyone for racism and having knives
>arrest me for wanting something done about the """"refugee"""" crisis
>mfw I'm typing this from prison

Anonymous 2016-08-24 07:34:11 Post No.31089931
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 07:34:11 Post No.31089931 [Report]

>>31087378
hippie get a job

Anonymous 2016-08-24 07:38:48 Post No.31089951
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 07:38:48 Post No.31089951 [Report]

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>nuggets will never be cheap enough to buy a bunch of crates full of them and swim in slavshit
>mfw

Anonymous 2016-08-24 09:15:03 Post No.31090338
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 09:15:03 Post No.31090338 [Report]

>>31088086
>implying Nugget Security "Fuck The Queen" aren't just GCHQ spies
>implying the "refugees" arent NSA plants
>implying you're also not a GCHQ sleeper agent
>implying i'm not one either

This must be what it's like then the ATF turn up to shoot some FBI agents staking out the DEA by accident.

Anonymous 2016-08-24 09:41:35 Post No.31090435
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 09:41:35 Post No.31090435 [Report]

>>31087202
What the fuck am I reading a fan fiction?

Nigga they just sell patches and military cosplay shit. The fuck is this phone business? Did you order a tactical diaper or not?

Anonymous 2016-08-24 10:03:22 Post No.31090490
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Anonymous 2016-08-24 10:03:22 Post No.31090490 [Report]