If your gun(s) could talk, what would they say?

Hi i am the gun

my Stevens 320 would be going "I'm so hurt daddy, they didn't build me right"

>What are you gonna do? Shoot me?

My AK-74 would probably beg for death because I have not cleaned it once even though I've shot about 1,000 rounds of 7N6 through it.

Marlin 30-30
>Cmon you wanna be cowboy, let's go kill a deer

>>30431834
>Boosh, chick chick, boosh, chick chick.
>All those clays... just slide on by.

Дaвaйтe бopoтьcя, тoвapищ

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>literally guns talking

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>>30434797

>>30431834
Help.

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>>30431834
Would rather have a talking motorrad named Hermes

>>30431834
My mare's leg

>FLIP ME HARDED DADDY

>>30434369
Show your raifu the attention she deserves anon. If you don't, chad will.

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FAL
>When are we jumping again?
>When am I getting a new flash hider?
>Why'd you buy me a DBAL, you don't have NODs.

FNX
>Why do I have 4 mags full of different ammo?

M&P Shield
>Would you please wear me under something other than an aloha shirt, you're not that old.

Mosin Nagant
>When are you bringing your friends over again?

>my gun talk to me
>he tellin me "don't tuck me"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJZbNfEKg4Y

>shoot me you stupid faggot

>>30431834
>mossman 500
take off that recoil pad you pussy.
>muh long arms.

>glock 34
Move to a free state

>c308
Move to a free state

>mosin
Can you shoot non-corrosive ammo for once?

>>30434348
Chortle.

>>30434369
That's just sinful. Berdan primed ammo is corrosive, a chrome lined barrel can only do so much against corrosion.

Clean your god damn bore out bro lol. Windex with ammonia is the dopest before using bore solvent.

>>30431834
"Yuo not feel tannerite boom in chest because am kick so good. Sorry."
"It's okay, bud. We haven't gone past a pound yet anyway."
"Mmm. Am understand better. I keep try to put boolit in orange painted bag good."

>>30431834
Mosin:
"Please, if you fucked your ass with my bolt at least clean it before giving it back"

"Pew pew pew pew."

>>30431834
>>30436191
>Berdan primed ammo is corrosive
fuk u

>>30436421
The compound inside the berdan primer has salts. The powder charge may not be corrosive, but the priming compound does. You can find this information on the world wide web.

>>30436462
ur dumb fuk off

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>>30431834
>SKS
Something in either Russian or Chinese.

>maverick 88
>You know, I've never had a slug before...and you've got three boxes. What the FUCK, man.

>girsan 1911
Something in Turkish?

>AR frankengun
>MOTHERFUCKER you need to put that old trigger back in me again or I'll keep light striking, slamfiring, or locking up on you!

>polish AK kit that I blew up with a faulty assembly
>pic related

>>30431834
I must unite the Germanic peoples and secure a future for white children.

odd because I only buy Russian milsurp

>>30431834
Why am still at your grandsma house? I've been here since 2011.

SKS
>why did you buy AR
>I am good enough
>your father spent weeks on my stock you shit do not scratch
>I was your first anon, I'll always be your first
>please, Eddie likes me. Take me sometimes too into woods
>I'll stop stove-piping, I promise

AR
>yeah ok man "you" build me
>I'm not like that Yugoslavian bitch, you need to clean me right and often. And I don't do steel cased.
>don't lie you like me more
>you were my first, doesn't mean you were my best
>I wish you'd get us optics instead of this magpul sight
>if you get one of those autistic dust covers I will jam on you every time

Colt police .38 special
>where am I
>what is this and who are you
>oh uh... No. My old owner never really shot me
>I was in New York's finest though!
>wow, all the way out here in the newest state. Neat
>I'm not a cowboy gun you fucking redneck, stop dressing like one and OCing me in the desert
>holy shit, a whole box of ammo! That'll last us a few years
>what do you mean about 30 minutes? I'm not supposed to be shot this much
>anon don't return me, they never shoot me.

>tfw I will never have my understanding old Russian love and my new finicky Ameircan flame arguing over who goes innawoods with me
>tfw I will never teach my mature New Yorker revolver that guns can be used for fun instead of just held in a police holdster all day
It hurts lads

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>>30434827
nah

>Mossberg 500 with folding stock
HIGH SPEED LOW DRAG WOOOOOO!
>Bodyguard 38
...you know your wife shoots me better, right?
>Makarov
Damn you can't shoot handguns.
>.22
It's been a while, hasn't it?
>AR-12
When the fuck are we going out for fun?

>>30438168
>>30434827

Ayyyy, it's been a while since I've seen these posted. It seemed like everyone jumped ship over to the mlp stuff for a while.

>>30435025
Do you have the mustache to go with the shirt?

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bump

>>30438168
Is this like an anime version of fluffy abuse?

Gun: Tavor SAR

>Hey boss?
What?
>Do they make Palestinian shaped targets?
Please don't ask me things like that.

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>>30439724
>ywn own an original full-auto belt-fed AR-10

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early morning bump

>>30439771

Tavor: "Hey goy, I see you got paid today, you're going to donate to the shoah foundation right? You're not a Nazi are you?

>>30441197
I just love having my mags fall out.

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>>30431834
sks
>oh, corrosive ammo again?
>why did you stick my bayonet in your ass anon? That's kinda gay

T97
>I'm the newest, why do you put me in the cheapest case when we go to the range
(It's because it doesn't fit in my hardcase)

870 clone
>SHOOT ME YOU FUCKING FAGGOT

>>30438365
I'm not allowed to grow facial hair, we Paratroopers now.

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>>30431834

TFW when you have no talking gun or are not a blue genetically formed space infantryman....

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>>30441304