I plan on enlisting, what should i not fucking do.

>>30018291
>what should i not fucking do
enlist.

>>30018291
Pro-tip: Don't enlist during peace time. If you didn't catch that DON'T ENLIST DURING PEACE TIME.

>>30018291
abandon your post to take a piss or shit.

guy was telling me he left his foxhole to take a shit, and had to dodge friendly fire all the way back to his hole after tripping an illumination flare

>>30018306
lied

>>30018310
mmm I don't know, he is a fucking criminal retard, he would do it.

said it was screwed to a tree, he wrenched it off the tree and felt it start heating up, so he tried take it to a nearby stream and let it blow underwater, it shot out of his hands and starting ping ponging around the creek-bed, he bolted back toward his foxhole while friendlies opened fire

You're gonna fuck it up, OP.

>>30018325
as a former career enlisted man, let me tell you something.


your friend is a blatant and obvious liar.

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>>30018306
>>30018325
>Illumination flares
>Being used as an alarm
>In the age of NVG's and I sensors

>>30019229
We still use trip wire flares nvgs more specifically the SU250 monoculars are shit. Also OP don't enlist it's a trap I've been in for 4 and my self and everyone I know is getting out. If you wanna play military go officer. That's where the money and the bitches are at niqqa

>>30018305
Why shouldnt he enlist during peace time?

>>30018291
Don't be a cunt
Don't out preform your troop
Don't strive for perfection strive for good enough.

My father was made to scrub the Libertines when he made a perfect score on one his medical tests.

Don't enlist, OP. Just don't.

>>30018291
Don't tell them that your Antman yourself from /k/ unless you want to see if you can survive more than a few seconds before getting ass raped by kommandos that stupidly enlisted as well.

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>He fell for the enlistment meme

If someone HAS to go in, the smart ones ensure they go in with a commission.

>>30018291
Sit yourself down and come up with an honest answer for why you're doing this. If your long term goals do not necessitate going military, you would be wise to not go military. Should your plans necessitate a that kind of experience and background, you'd be a fool to enlist when you could've gone officer. Of course, that means staying in ten years instead of four, but enlisting during wartime is not a very bright idea, and in peacetime, it's an even worse one. Either way, I hope for your sake that you've fantasized about a riveting career in garrison life.

Why not enlist?

The fuck would I do instead?

>>30021589
>The fuck would I do instead?

Be a retard that joins in as an officer because /k/ is a bunch of 13 year olds that only thinks about muh munny

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>>30021647
>muh munny
And stature. And influence. And not ensuring you'll end up someone's personal assistant (which is 1000% the case in the enlisted corps, instead of 50% the case in the officer corps)

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>>30021697
>And stature. And influence.
>butterbars unironically think this

You don't have influence, you don't even have leadership skills. You pimply 20 year old virgin fuck

Whatever you do. Dont fuck someones wife.

>>30018291
Army Aviation

Try for Warrant Officer pilot, or helicopter crew chief.

This is the only way to have a career in the military that isn't fucking retarded. You'll be really busy though. Which is good because it makes the duty day, field exercises, and deployments go by faster.

>>30021728
Whatever you do, don't fuck enlisted wives because they all look like dumpsters.

Shoot for those hourglass women.

Currently aiming at paras.

Chances are slim for getting in, much less as an officer (where I live you can't enlist as officer in the combat branch)

Doing and finishing philosophy now, which is as much worth as shit anyways.

On your first day of basic, look your DI/DS right in the fuckin eyes and do nothing else.

he will see your warrior spirit and make you a squad leader or something cool.

Next, you gotta spend all your free time drinking redbull and jerking it in the barracks. the military loves a stud.

If you're not some religious virgin, you should hook up with a chick as soon as possible and marry them. trust me, they think your commitment is hot. i recommend going to a bar. make sure everyone inside knows you're enlisted. you'll be swamped in pussy.

once you're out of basic with a sick wife and a reputation as a stone cold stud. you gotta spend every ounce of saved pay on something big and flashy. i recommend a motorcycle. people will know you're the sickest cunt on base. oh, and get into fights too. that way everyone knows you're top dog.

>>30021966
Dubs of truth

>>30021697

Lol, story time.

>bunk mate in basic is 09S
>real fuckin' hard charger
>pretty damn good fitness, thinks he's hotter shit than he his, though
>real fuckin cockhead attitude
>we start out as total bros, end on somewhat rocky terms
>he really, really wants to be infantry
>goes to OCS
>tries being a hard charger
>doesn't charge hard enough
>gets artillery

So if you meet a relatively intelligent and super pissed artillery 2nd Luey...

>>30021966

There's no redbull or bars in basic. Or pussy.

Save for unwashed private pussy.

>>30021562
Boy I sure do miss President Ron.

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>>30021712
Hoo boy

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>>30022407
Army officers know how to run things

Afterwards, he was tipping the FBI off on all Hollywood actors who held Communist views. A badass.

>>30019270
Being assigned actual meaningful jobs, less supervision, actually ranking up. Getting paid like a motha fucka

During peace time - bored brass and heirarchy . Make you do STUPID shit like wash and scrub random shit, like rock. Brass gets even more bored, needs to test equipment.
You now wash rocks in a full MOPP gear. STUPID pointless marches. Uniform pressed perfectly, inspections constantly . Promotions by signing up others. Death by power point.
Get demoted due to massive article 15s from bored command.

>>30022765

That's also perfect time for an enlisted to do courses & study, maybe also ranking up

not op. how good of an idea is enlisting and get a pog job so i can do online college at night

>>30023103

Lol, if you're in a job with peacetime capabilities, your days might get even longer.

>>30023119
whys that? the air force guys ive talked to tell me they're doing 9-5. i doubt id get into the air force though

>>30022765
OP Here i had an interest primarily in army or marines most likely just marines, so i guess question is that i would pretty much be doing useless shit most of the time if i went ahead and enlisted within a few days here.

>>30023231
If war even wages, go ahead and enlist. In Vietnam era days you had badass soldiers who basically did what they want with their uniforms curb stomping vietscum. Now? You'd get your ass beat by your literally homosexual bunk mates because your third from the top button had a fingerprint on it and your CO decided to make everyone do 5 hours of calisthenics for it.

>>30023231
lol bro you're several years too late. You dun goof'd.