Joining VDV

>>29921264
Please be bait. Please.

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It's 6:15AM Central, get ready for school you faggot.

Only if your asshole is tight enough.

Please be joking. This is sad to read.

If you're serious, Russian Armed Forces accept any foreigners since a few years ago, so long as you're fluent in Russian. Can't tell you what you'd end up doing, though, plus, the minimum service is longer than for locals. Don't be a faggot and join just to use a certain gun. You might as well join Daech if it's to play with AK's.

>>29921264
vdv is garbage

>>29921264
>As an american citizen, how would I go about joining the VDV? Do they accept foreign fighters, and what are their standards?
>American citizen
Sure, just not in the VDV but in the VVS. You'll get no AKs tho, but you'll get a wicked callsign "FOP".

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>>29921264
>american
>joining VDV

They ought to videotape the "hazing", that would sell for top dollar on certain sites for people with "exotic" tastes and hobbies.
The amount of footage that you'd have would last for several volumes, they might even afford another BMD-4 for the money they'd earn.
They could call it "The Stupid Fucking Burger" in honor of the man who now can use the famous domes of Saint Basil's Cathedral as buttplugs.

Make sure to buy a proper GPS. Don't want to end up crossing into a foreign country and get paraded on Ukrop TV.

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> join VDV
> get to use the latest AK technology
> earn citizenship, get qt3.14 slav wife

This is a pretty good plan tbf (to be frank)

>>29921264
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlQ6KqTlyfk

>>29921264
stop being autistic, kiddo

>>29921483
hello ridf

>>29921264
>american
>joining russian armed forces

>vdv
>standards other than being retarded enough to break bottles with head and good singing voice

>chooses army based on weapons platform

>vdv
>elite unit

I want you to go there and suffer for your stupidity child

>>29921264
>elite unit
>wants to join the VDV
getting mixed signals here

>the only thing that will be elite is your asshole from getting raped everyday
Have fun

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>>29921264
>He fell of the singing russian army guy video meme.

>>29921264
Здpaвcтвyйтe, my name is Ken-Ivaninovich.

I’m a 27 year old American Vatnik (Putin fan for you pindos). I write cyrillic on my tablet, and spend my days perfecting my art and posting superior Russian military equipment threads on /k/. (PAK FA, S-400, Armata series)

I train with my AK-74 every day, this superior weapon can shoot clean through steel because it is folded over a thousand times, and is vastly superior to any other weapon on earth. I earned my gun license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.

I speak Russian fluently, both Northern Russian and the Ukrainian dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about Russian history and their squatting code, which I follow 100%

When I get my Russian visa, I am moving to Moscow to join the prestigious VDV to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a spec ops for Putin or a tank designer!

I own several track suits, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to Russia, so I can fit in easier. I squat everywhere and speak Russian as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond.

Wish me luck in Russia!

>>29921867
> VDV - So many victories!

which victories would those be?

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>>29922874
>>29921965
>>29921951
>>29921297

they're more elite than the american army. probably on par with the american marines

>>29921979
How couldn't you? It's something straight out of command&conquer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rAHrHd2lcw

>>29922874
Google any of the following:
Battle of Lake Khasan
Battles of Khalkhin Gol
World War II
Nagorno-Karabakh War
Soviet war in Afghanistan
First Chechen War
Second Chechen War
2008 South Ossetia war
2014 Crimean crisis
War in Donbass

>>29921264
You must be proficient in Russian, also pepper your angus.

>>29924507
Suppose I have hemmorhoids, can i avoid the anal plundering?

>>29921264

The VDV is as elite as any regular american airborne infantry.

That includes 82nd an, so not very elite.

>>29923297
they're just bunch of unwashed, filthy drunks whose training consists of learning to break bottles with their head. Since their heads are not good for anything else

>>29924482
those records pale in comparison of what even the USMC has achived.

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Get ready for become a rooster, sucking dicks all day long.