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So I live at a lake house, and there is a fucking infestation of Canada geese. These shits are loud as fuck, shit on my lawn, scare off ducks and based loons, and in general are obnoxious little shits. So /k/, my question to you is how I should go about ridding the lake of what I now consider vermin and a blight on the land.
There are people all around so guns are probably not an option, but I hold no reservations as to time invested and methods employed. It's illegal to kill the geese so it will have to be done sneeki breeki like.
Current plan is to put on a wetsuit and some flippers and attack from below with a knife or makeshift spear. Hopefully anyone watching will mistake me for a snapping turtle.
Plan B is to follow them at night to their nests, mark the locations, then kill them later on as they sleep
There are around 30 geese in the area, and I would like to reduce that number to less than 5.
tl;dr total war against goose infestation.
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Katana
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Find their nest and put olive oil or similar on their eggs to suffocate the hatchlings, since they get oxygen through the eggs.
Also my dad has a tall tale of him hunting geese with just bread. He'd lure them in with bread crumbs, then grab their neck and swing them over his head like a lasso, then have goose for dinner. But be careful, geese will peck/tackle you if you fuck with them
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Lace some bread with arsenic or something poisonous then throw it out to them. Pick up what's left with gloves so that nothing else gets killed that you don't want to be killed. That should take care of it.
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>>29800787
make a makeshift silencer and shoot the CuckBirds to smithereens
>inb4 muh laws
it's not illegal if you don't get caught ;^)
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>>29800787
> Current plan is to put on a wetsuit and some flippers and attack from below with a knife or makeshift spear. Hopefully anyone watching will mistake me for a snapping turtle.
All I'm fucking imagining is your neighbors staring as they see an autistic man in a wetsuit in waist deep water chasing geese with a butcher knife
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>>29800842
>Lace some bread with arsenic or something poisonous then throw it out to them.
Considering this, any suggestions on what sort of poison to use? The only issue would be collecting the corpses, a bunch of dead geese floating in front of my house isn't exactly subtle.
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>>29800927
Killing a population of 20 down to 15 will probably get noticed by neighbors as well.
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>>29800946
*5 I mean
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>>29800946
They can notice whatever they want, the issue is making sure it can't ever be traced back to me. I'd like to make the geese disappear, not just deaded.
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You could use large amounts of laxatives. Make them overdose on it and watch them shit to death. That would be funny and get rid of the problem.
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