/brit/

first for shit thread

>>79493643
me on the left

babestation

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>>79493643
>tfw 6'3

Me on the far right

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>tfw google knows about my mundane hobby in tracking down psychics and listening to swedish dreampop

Communication between human beings usually consists of 97% of non linguistic factors like facial expression, tone of voice and so on

So it is only natural to use reaction image to help your communication in anonymous

I chose time. There are 4 dimensions - length, width, height and time. What should I have fallen in love with, width? Come on now

back in sixth form because I'm a moron

intimidating because I know nobody

the hard truth is that our minds simply cannot fathom the machinations of the universe and that we are severely intellectually limited. we'll end up augmenting our brains with technology/AI and eventually become half-human half-mech beings that are plagued with unforeseeable issues.

we'll become the Borg

Don't understand why people like that quadroon Venti. She's clearly a fat hog, but she angles the camera favorably.

>>79493688
moron

>>79493657
don't say that you are my favourite poster

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>>79493687
time is a human construct

>>79493688
alri grandad

>>79493696
I think shes very pretty and she has ample breasts

however isn't she only like 19, so maybe a bit young (24)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Persecutory_delusion

Think Tim may be suffering from a spot of this

>twitch still requires flash
state of them. shant be visiting their site until they join us in 2017

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>One of the Navy’s four strategic submarines is always on patrol, ensuring a continuous at sea deterrent, 24/7/365, carrying the nation’s ultimate weapon somewhere in the Seven Seas. Today’s Vanguard-class submarines uphold a mission which began in the late 1960s – since April 1969 the Royal Navy’s ballistic missile boats have not missed a single day on patrol

>During a patrol, the submarine is required to remain silent and is allowed to make contact with the United Kingdom only in an emergency. It navigates using mapped contour lines of the ocean floor and patrols a series of planned "boxes" measuring several thousand square miles. A 1,000-metre-long aerial trails on the surface behind the submarine to pick up incoming messages. Intelligence is constantly relayed to the vessel, giving details of shipping movements and potentially hostile aircraft or submarines in the area. Most of the 150 crew never know where they are or where they have been

Who want to be my favourite poster?

>>79493696
I like when she answers my stupid questions

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pukbzCC3cfQ
fat bastard

>>79493715
I'm 19. You're an old man. :^)

>>79493731
*raises hand and bends over*

There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call the Twilight Zone.

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>>79493705
honestly i am flattered thank you

>>79493724
gigantic waste of money I say this as a rorke

>>79493735
you'll be 24 too before long
they don't lie, time really does pass faster the older you get

lad who's going to uni after 8 years of neetdom

what's your major?

since turning 18 my life has been pretty shite pretty much nothing has happened but it occurred to me, why dont I just pretend I am 18 instead of 20 and I can try again. I look 18, i feel no different than at 18 so kinda makes sense. Only problem is how would I go about legally pretending im 18. any ideas?

>dimensions past 4

err no darling

>>79493687
>>79493710

https://youtu.be/Uf3hL2A0JhQ?t=1m25s

*spooky Twilight Zone music starts playing*

can hear my nigerian neighbour laughing at 3.26am

wish I had that kind of optimism

>>79493619
that's just your president delivering a speech

since turning 18 my life has been pretty great.

>>79493735
I'm 31, the next 12 years will pass faster for you than you ever expected

>>79493743
Definitely my favourite poster

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some girl i don't know added me to normiebook, the profile doesn't look fake at all

wtf do i do now?

am i no longer a virgin?

I've come to realize that anglophones are the most capable at expressing themselves solely with the written word.

And no, this isnt just a personal bias because its my native tongue.

Obviously germans can communicate certain things with precision (ie. Conceptually difficult-to-grasp philosophy), the French, other things (ie. Romantic or inspirational things), tje Japanese other things yet (ie. Esoteric sentiments a la 'sage time'). But English can do a bit of it all.

English speakers also rely the most on wit in expression, wordplay, etc. while other languages dont even seem to have an ability to impart humour (ex. German).

>>79493750
i agree but it's easy for me to say as a yank. we have 63(iirc) nuclear submarines patrolling the oceans

>>79493750
just know that when you go to bed later, it is out there, thousands of miles away, deep in the atlantic
ever aware

ever vigilant

>>79493756
I'm 19 I feel 14.all my mates are slowly disappearing too

>>79493749
Who is this godess?

>>79493724
why tf do they need 150 people to man these things
jesus christ

>>79493681
google literally knows where you have been of every day if you have your location always. Its in the settings if your on android

>>79493774
i made it to about 22 before falling into a depression that's all but completely destroyed me

I recognize trump has weird orange skin

But I think making fun of a person for his skin colour is very bad

lots of nice middle class girls
shame I'm autismo

>>79493782
what an absolutely abhorrent post

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You unlock this door with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension—a dimension of sound, a dimension of sight, a dimension of mind. You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of things and ideas. You've just crossed over into the Twilight Zone.

>>79493807
>having a google account
>not installing a gapps-free ROM

>>79493688
how old?

*pulls out iPhone X in Northern England*
*a crowd starts to gather*

>>79493807
My location was on because I was driving and using the GPS to find a restaurant I used to go to when I was a kid when I was up north for a bit.
I usually just keep it off because it might run down the battery probably.

>>79493814
lefties have been insulting Trump's 9 year old son. very immature desu

Ever since turning 19 my life has been awful

>>79493814
need you to cram by bollocks into the barrel of an artillery piece at the border xxx

>>79493807
Yeah that's cool I like it
there's a thing called timeline

after a long cycle or hike I like to check it and see how many miles I've done and where I've been

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>>79493798
did yahoo answers shut down?
(no idea 2bh)
>>79493802
don't know
i'd probably be watching a doc about it now but it's way too late

>>79493807
i had a big data class where our uni bought a few terabytes of info from them and we did stuff like make predictions off of people's past history. was fun but lots of porn searches and potentially personally identifiable searches that weren't blocked out

>>79493822
Its true, though. German speakers basically have to shit all over each other to convey love.

>>79493750
yeah mate i agree we shouldnt waste money on our nations defence we should spend it on welfare and healthcare for muslims instead

>>79493715
She's 20, I thought she was like 25 at first

>>79493864
Baboon nonce

>>79493833
>they beat you to death for being a bender

>>79493860
what a frighteningly terrible statement

>5'7"
Is there any hope for me?

>>79493892
no.

>>79493750
na mate it is an everlasting nuclear deterrent, you dont know if at any second the world is gonna go batshit crazy

https://mobile.twitter.com/ian_watkins/status/280111462314303488

Squalling

>>79493892
I don't know about America but probably not. I'm 5'9 here in London and I'm ridiculously small. I don't think any one takes me seriously

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glad we are giving up on that 'EU' meme

people say right wingers can't be funny
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmbmLi_xO8M

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>>79493914
>@kymypops there's evidence to support the big bang theory but that doesn't make it definitely true does it?

>>79493921
Didn't Cameron suggest sending the navy to sink the fuckers? He was right

alright lads, in the wake of the current election here in Germany i got the chance to talk to candidate Martin Schulz yesterday in a talkshow. I took the opportunity to explain my vision to him and asked him for his help. He seemed confused at first and then slightly reluctant, but as I insisted he finally conceded and told me he would get in touch with the army as soon as possible to outline a plan as to how we can most effectively and efficiently find a way to affix me on an air-to-ground ballistic missile and fire it into an ISIS stronghold, thereby completely and utterly dismantling my bollocks.

so that's my vote set for now. hope he keeps his promise.

>>79493892
only as a qt twink

>>79493892
yeah you'll be fine

is this german from KC??
absolutely dire

>>79493961
did you talk to him in English or German?

>>79493826
Boaz and Jachin

how can the media blame North Korea on white people

thinking....

>>79493980
they're blaming it on russia, and therefore trump, and therefore white people

>>79493980
Evil American imperialists

might watch 'It'
any good?

>>79493976
obscure reference

>>79493802

You have three 8 hour shifts, so you only *need* 50 to man it but you need 150 to continuously man it

>>79493995
>>79493992
ok wow wtf fuck xlorg and wypipo

>>79493980
>Media in collusion with people who want to demonize white people and make them strangers in their own homeland so that businesses can stagnate labor costs and increase demand for housing and food ect

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>have sex with girl
>she says dont cum inside
>cum inside anyway

c'mon lads how can I apply for jobs and uni stuff whilst lying that im two years younger?

>>79493921
>we'll just go and 'rescue' these illegal migrants a few miles off the coast of libya, then drive them hundreds of miles in the opposite direction to italy
JUST fuck my europe up f.am

>>79493996
more like 'shIt' lol

keep having to clear 4chan.org from my keyboards auto suggest

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>>79494015
>have sex with girl
>she asks if she can cum
>tell her no
>she does anyway then instantly falls asleep

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>>79494010
why the fuck do you need 50 people to man it?

even pic related, the biggest there is, apparently only needs 13 men to operate.

https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20121226205019AAZUKI1

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>>79493921
>>79494030
Poor Sicily

>>79494069
this one has no weapons, no nuclear and is vastly simpler

>>79494069
have you ever seen Das Boot krautlad

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The absolute state of Canada

>>79494069
>tfw was going to work on these but Thatcher destroyed the industry

Shot yourselves worthless subhumans

>>79494069
underwater vessels are more technical to operate.
Plus thats just a cargo ship, it caries stuff, it doesn't blow holes in ships or conduct naval combat.

>>79494111
Shoot*

Just filled in the same sex marrage vote form lads.

>>79494092
>montreal

and nothing of value was lost

>>79494122
Will it pass bruce

>>79494122
What did you vote?

>>79494097
same

sharkbait ooh ah ah

>>79494069

Because its not a warship, doesnt go underwater and doesnt have a nuclear engine.

You need men for Comms, Engines and engine maintenance, weapons and weapons maintenance, Navigation, Sonar+Sensors plus officers , chefs and medical officers.

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>>79494092
JUST

>>79494079
>>79494091
>>79494097
>>79494113


i refuse to believe that in the computer age you need more than ten men to operate a floating tube

can't get a bank card cos I have no proof of address

>>79494146
Well believe this, you do

>>79494113
or carry 100+ nuclear missiles
ohio-class submarines are fucking spooky 2bh. hard to believe that we have literally dozens of them silently patrolling around all the world's oceans

>>79494156
Why not? Are you of no fixed address?

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why do we have immigration from non white, 3rd world countries?

>>79494136
>>79494136
Yes.

turned down for a credit card because I put on the application form that credit and debt are jewish traps

>>79494179
because *blows a raspberry, perhaps as an imitation of a fart*

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>>79494092
>Trudeau trading the future of Canada for positive media coverage
Why are so many government officials falling for this grandiose self indulgent shit?

you are all losers

>>79494165
wonder if some just go lost every once in a while and the public just never learns about it
like some day they just no longer respond and the lamettaheads just shrugs and crosses them out from the list

>>79494179
white leftist traitors bringing us down from the inside

>>79494177
no I just have no solid proof of address like a utility bill

>>79494179
Allegedly for humanitarian reasons but really it's cheap labour to undercut the indigenous workforce and create the need for higher taxes

Also fucks over the 3rd world with brain drain

BEETTTOOOOOO

>>79494179
kike orchestrated white genocide la

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>>79494165
Nah m8 that shit is sick as fuck, literal leviathans of the ocean.

>>79494179
cheap labour mostly

>>79494195
Oh right

>>79494156
>>79494195
retard

>>79494220
This really.

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begone thots

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mfw yanks pronounce paracetamol as ays-ta-me-no-fen

if i found a way to snea into a naval base and somehow tie myself to a sub before it went out on patrol, the horrendous pressure of the deep sea would surely splinter my bolocks

Need a cute British or Australian boy to gently take me to pound town. NINA

>>79494231
dum diddly dee cletus the dang tractors broken again

>>79494244
Apparently it actually wouldn't because we're mostly water anyway

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>>79494192
Nah, stuff like that catches media coverage, recently a few navy ships have collided with random ships due to incorrect piloting.

like this post to NUT instantly

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>>79494222
we're getting new destroyers too

miss being in secondary and just being out with your mates the entire day

>>79494280
Zumwalt looks pretty slick

>>79494280
Oh shit whadup

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>>79494264
BTFO

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>tfw no Southern italian gf

>>79494264
read a thing that said the chinese hacked their guidance systems and put them on a collision course
doubt it though

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Business idea: make catgirls real and rake in the NEET bux

>>79494264
yes, but these are a) sur-surface and b) involve a civilian ship. they are observable. if a tree falls in a forest but there is noone there to hear it, the gouvernment will claim the tree is still standing.

miss shit like this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qO-mSLxih-c

>>79494298
Here ya go lad

https://twitter.com/CornellBarnard/status/908493160501743616

>>79494280
floating commieblock desu

Why is the german poster posting unfunny things

>>79494301
Probably the same cowardly slugs that are attacking Tim

>>79494288
miss being in sixth form and sitting in spoons all day getting drunk

>>79494303
Perhaps.
This is all hypothetical.
Hypotheticals aren't good arguing points.

>>79494323
What did you eat for dinner?

>>79494331
never did this because I was an autismo

>>79494323
i will eat your ass boi

Why did Anglos let the Germans and Irish outbreed them and take over the US?

>>79494323
Basic English probably, needs a larger vocabulary.

>>79494335
no its real i saw it on tv

google "red october", scary shit

>>79494355
who the fuck wants to have dozens of kids for silly reasons?

>>79494317
>this is what pop used to be before all normies turned into social media driven pussies

>>79494156
you can use my address if you like

>>79494369
>soviet union submarine

----------------------- RUNT LINE-----------------------
---------------------------------------------------------------

-NO RUNTS ALLOWED BENEATH THIS LINE-

>>79494355
you mean nigerians and somalis

got drunk during the day in spoons at uni too

I think I just have an alcohol problem

>>79494370
This, you only need like 1-2.

>>79494400
RORKE

i showed this thread to my mum and you're all grounded

>>79494437
I showed my peepee to your mom

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>>79494437
Show her this

>>79494355
same reason muzzies shit out so many kids

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r8 the shoes

whenever I press refresh and theres no new post I have to look out my window and make sure everythings alright. Pls dont leave me lads.

8 veiws
175 comments
That's the power of reviewbrah

>>79494518
sorry mate

>>79494518
hello

>>79494518
If you marry me, I'll never leave you. :^) cute American girl btw.

americans are fat and stupid

why does beto post at this time
arent you people supposed to be asleep

>>79494539
VERY rude. Can't say I'm a fan of this post.

>>79494544
cram that overworked piehole shut

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perusing a poo

>>79494563
never reply to my posts

lads

im not drunk but ive had 2 decent sized glasses of whisky and I gotta say getting affected and playing oblivion is so much fun

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took me an hour to wank
hate being ill

>his cunt is found by immigrants
Settler is a kind of immigrants

>>79493643
>Tfw no qt petite brit gf to fuck all night
>>79494544
>Used to be Neet
>Stayed up all fucking night till like 6 in the morning
Neets are nocturnal m8.

>>79494579
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qN80_7rNmcE

have you heard of the high elves

gargh

ourgh

mmphhh

>>79494597
never actually tried poisoned apples

how do i do it

>>79494537
you aint one of those hairy american girls with a penis and tiny tits are you?

>>79494627
those are the best kind

>>79494610
strawman
it's not the 1700s anymore

I want to graduate so I can live off my investments and be a neet

>>79494646
strawman
the only reason its not the 1700s anymore is because of a number on a calendar

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>>79494627
You on the left :^)

FUCK FAGS

Fun fact : its wh*tes who brought negro people into america

79494704

are jews considered white?

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>not knowing how to reply

>>79494704
wrong

portugese arent white

when will the so-called wh*te race pay for it's sins?

I've got heartaches by the number, troubles by the score

everyday you love me less, each day I love you more

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>mexicans cant even reply to posts properly because some of their fingers were cut off by drug cartels

>>>/pol/141581162
made a thread

>>79494673
aww buy me a plane ticket and i''ll be under your covers before you can say "why is there a cock in my mouth"

Would be totally embarrassed if anyone at work knew I browsed /brit/. I have a lot of English co-workers that think I don't like English culture.

>>79494738
big iron on his hiiiiiiiiiiiiip

>>79494694
good idea

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>Tfw no Australian hunnie to hump
>>79494738
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrmPDUvKyLs

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>>79494758
thought of a brit gimmick the other day whilst in public and started laughing to myself
a few people gave me weird looks, embarrassing

>>79494798
GREAT album

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>>79494800
British culture has completely broken him! He's begging for more!

KOT

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>gimmick

business idea: refer to grim gimmicks as grimmicks

>>79494835
Why would anyone do that and think it's cool?

I'm drinking British beer right now

Bender

got called turkish on /pol/

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>>79494738
cass

>>79494798
Good choice

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PG8yTUeptFU

>>79494800
dont know why its weird to love to yourself, is it really weird to find things funny?

she'll be right

>>79494917
What's up man?
Everything okay?

siri find me a russian gf

Pirates of shit

got called a nigger on playerunknown's battlegrounds

>ctrl+f (y
>no results found

>ctrl+f (y
>1 result found

>>79494997
here you go poo bum

you did it!!

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>>79495006
>>79495007

>>79494932
just lonely

How do I make IPhone Siri show bobs and vagene?

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>>79495034
me too
I nearly always have to initiate conversations
Nobody starts one with me
Nobody texts me
Dont think many care massively

Not anyone's good or best friend anymore, just a friend, interchangeable with their other friends that they are somewhat aware of.

Not good for the soul

people only talk to me because I sell drugs

tfw 5'9
JUST

alri

>>79495128
m-me too.

Saw a runt posting he was 5'9". Thought he meant dick length. Oh my lans, didn't realize they made """men""" that small.

who is alri

>>79495176
all right --> alri

>>79495176
That "German" Supermarket with cheap food, yeah?

>>79495034
Same. Bit of the old "been chronically ill for 7 years now and out of work for 2" deal. tbf, just want to be a Dad before I go.

>>79495176
me

Went to a neurologist a year ago and the sexy girl in a white top literally said "here ya' go, baby" as she handed me the order sheet for the EEG.

I didn't say anything in response and it's still haunting me as I was reminded of her today when a similar looking girl in a white top smiled at me leaving Trader Joe's

>>79495218
Starved for affirmation and attention from females, are you?

I used to work in a clothing store in a black neighborhood and these sexy little black girls would always call me baby or babe or love all the time. Strange considering I actually left with my ebony fetish weakened rather than strengthened because I discovered black girls get stretch marks and rough skin very easily. Their face stays pretty tho

>>79495233
>Starved for affirmation and attention from females, are you?
Actually, I'm more starved for a woman and companionship, and being a normal guy for being 26. I'm a really handsome guy just an odd ball and terrible with chick humour and repartee. The less I give a fuck the better though.

Dubious. Actual handsome and functional young men don't need to flaunt that fact to 4chan of all places.

>'m a really handsome guy just an odd ball and terrible with chick humour and repartee
hahhahaha

i'm a 30 year old virgin haha

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Girls like /cum/ more than /brit/

>>79495277
Why would I lie? Although, I guess Edward Norton isn't exactly a stud I was told once I looked like a cross between him and James Dean
>>79495280
I know it sounds funny, the sad part is it's literally 100 percent true. In some ways I'm a fallen chad.
>>79495286
No, I've had plenty of sex but never had a long term relationship. I've always been distant and have trouble being open and affectionate.

I thought this was /cum/

message from /cum/
>>79495294

i am mocking of you because you should not be wasting your time here

ahahaha the mexicano

>>79495330
you waste more time here than most people

i only post here at nights

>>79494875
I got called an Anglo on /pol/..

Jokes on them I'm only half anglo.

China killed btc

Fucking based

I've been told I look like a cross between George Clooney and Brad Pitt.

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>>79495503
i heard they did it to stop NK

>>79495533
>i heard they did it to stop NK
China's a leashed dog

>>79495503
loving the /biz/ autistic screeching

>>79495546
yea, they probably did it at our behest

i push my fingers into my eyes

>>79495562
lol I meant NK is a leashed dog
>>79495503
I bought 5000 ARK at 49 cents so I'm doing just fine with what little I've got in cryptocurrencies

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need a freckled gf

can't figure out why i dislike scotland lads

it'sa beautiful country, but it lacks certain qualities that england has. i think it's because scotland seems more like a travel destination than a real country

>>79495621
It's part of England, it's not a real country.

I hope shkreli is staying safe in jail

>>79495637
regardless, even wales has more soul and spirit than scotland does

>>79495665
Yeah that's because Wales is a real country

King Arthur and all that shite

trying to play my summer car

it is NOT going well at all lads

Morning lads

sorry i've been gone for like three weeks

hallo, er det noen der?

Runts ....

haitiANO

>>79495858
always nice to see you

can't believe it's Friday already

>>79495911
can't believe you're such a massive bender haha wahey

>>79495932
dont get it

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what happens here?

>>79495942
it means you're gay

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Am I doomed to inceldom?

>>79495980
this is very unsettling

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>>79495990
Sorry m8

No fucks who post pictures of themselves allowed

>>79496004
>>79496004
>>79496004
>>79496004
>>79496004