/brit/

imagine being a monolingual or not speaking a non-roman alphabet language

can't even FATHOM how one can be such a brainlet

LADS MY 14 YEAR OLD BROTHER CAUGHT ME SPUNKING INTO BOTTLES FOR PRE WORKOUT BOOSTS WHAT THE FUC KDO I DO

>>79483871
eat legumes, lean protein and broccoli/spinach/peas/cabbage etc.

drink a lot of water and black coffee....obviously don't drink any calories at all, and don't drink diet fizzy drinks (stimulates appetite)

my gf

http://i.4cdn.org/r9k/1505418788565.jpg

Knock, knock

>>79483444

>>79483895
https://youtu.be/fzEYeCew6tI

there's only one G*d, YHVH, but ther gods worshpped by other religions are probably angels or demons. they probably exist, they're just not G*d

>>79483934
nerd

*smothers your face with me fat yank arse*

>>79483965
who's there?

Bumped into the ex (2 months) on the way home from the gym lads...

Chatted for a minute or two, she said we should catch up soon; what did she mean by this?

I'm pretty much over her tbqh

ttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GktXlCEJ-HU

what a fucking TUNE lads

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the ideal gf

>>79483999
you just know she has an ugly fod under that fringe

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anyone fancy jumping off beachy head

>>79483999
post a video

>>79483955
>legumes
not doing this. eating wholegrains (rice and oats) and peas tho.
>lean protein
doing this: milk, chicken and fish
>veg
doing this: broc, carrots, green ppers, occasionally mushrooms.

finna not drink coffee because i get quite panic-attacky as it is anyway. finna drink green tea.

I'm a white boy from Ohio

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need a gf EXACTLY like this

>>79484003
*sneezes*

>ARSESHIT

>>79483963
what thread

>Shitterton

Nice to hear Cersei Lannister on the Mercedes ads

>>79484060

heard that cleveland is a real shithole

birmingham is the best city in the uk for foodies.

>>79484057
peas are a legume tbqh

But yeah, lentils and beans are very good (high protein, not overly calorific, low GI, lots of fibre.....they fill you up and are good for you)

Milk isn't the best tbqh, quite caloric and not very filling.

Sounds like you're doing alright though

yanks are thick as pigshite

http://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1505394469933.webm
*enters thread*

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>the mercury music prize

>>79484142
Odd way of spelling London :S

note: anyone that identifies as a 'foodie' should be drowned

RIP ludders

>>79484136
smells like one too

>>79484049
there's a beachy head thread on sqrt64chan

some autismo went down not ago and got talked out of it by the chaplins

you can't dilly dally or they'll getcha

>>79484145
some how became sort of allergic to beans from eating them alot (have a peanut allergy) . lentil/chickpeas are alright but too much effort to cook.

milk goes with oats + good for protein and casein.

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lol

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>>79484046

Someone tell me the point of life
Seriously questioning existence right now

>>79484185
london is fucking shite for consumers of food.

you have variety, but everything is overpriced and in terms of actually buying ingredients with which to cook you're cucked in several ways.

I stand by my earlier statement and I can provide arguments as to why.

>>79484205

why don't they just put mattresses and pillows at the bottom

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any fashy lads in

>>79484239
huh
how odd

>>79484250
to have fun and enjoy yourself

>>79484261
no.

>>79484261
14, but not 88

>>79484250
To experience sensations and sense experiences.

>>79484250
you have to find the point through life
living a lethargic life won't make your discover it though

>>79484219
>not wrestling it

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>>79484261
Maybe

Things I like:
Eating
Drinking
Dancing
Talking
Laughing

Things I don't like:
Writing dating profiles

>>79484250
to reach truth.

>>79484219
boomers should be gassed

>>79484219
Jesus

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might kill myself

>>79484261
Aisha is coming for you

few more weeks and i'll finally have grown out this shitty fucking haircut. can see it taking shape now

can't wait lads

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>>79484261
im supra-fascist

>>79484219
mess with crocs, end up in a box

>>79484252
eh not everywhere is overpriced tbqh

and the ingredients thing is nonsense.

Don't forget incomes are higher in London too.

>>79484250
you take your hand and clench it into a fist. now take your first finger and stick it all the way out.
then move your hand to where your heart is located in your body (just left off midchest)

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Raining out lads
Feels comfy

>>79484261
shut up

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might get drunk tonight fellas

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HNtsdtnBfk

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the gf

watching babymetal

>>79484174
love this pepe

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>>79484439
good lad

Anyone else seen that new Mitchell & Webb comedy "Back"?

One of the sub plots has David Mitchell's ex-wife try for a baby with her new man, he's black and David Mitchell's character has to remind her to have sex with him, and also has to keep guard in a caravan whilst they fuck

Got me thinking

>>79484299
can't have one without the other

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>>79484472
what went wrong

want Kev to put his willy in me gob x

mmm yum

>>79484008
Icy

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>>79483963
could've sworn this was her

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>>79484439
>>79484492

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>>79484219
Floridians are pussies

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>>79484327
aesthetic

>>79484506
Oh dear

>>79484473
doing a similar thing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4tS3_OCnQRc

perusing gfs on interpals

>>79484535
*calls out his name*
where could he be?

>>79484532
Icy who?

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>>79484535

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>>79484571
Hello?

>>79484381
Birmingham is fucking great for ingredients. you have several chinese supermarkets (not like grocers but big markets, one of which is fucking huge because its like the major conduit for the import of east/south-east asian food into the UK (that then gets sent on to the chinese restaurants across the cunt)).

You have the fish markets that are less of a meme than billingsgate and also ridiculously cheap but fresh. The indoor markets is also pretty good for meat, you can find grouse, guineafowl, i've found vennison and so on there. You have the outdoor markets with cheap produce + luxury shit that fell of the back of a lorry for pennies. By contrast if you go to borough market you're going to need to take a second mortgage out on your house (oh wait you're in a flatshare what am i on about) just for the same shit.

You also have very comprehensive paki and middle eastern markets/shops - whereas the ones i found in tower hamlets/brick lane were strangely lacking (though they had mental amounts of fish).

I'd say in terms of random cuisines, birmingham is en-par with london - ample polski skleps and turkish grocers and so on.

This is all proximal to the city centre, whereas in london you're going to have to sit on the tube for 50 minutes to get to an equivalent indian grocers in wembley and you'll probably pay through your teeth once you arrive there.

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>>79484571

why is he walking towards the camera?

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need a resurgence of the original 2bh
we sunk below #100 in reposts until this post i'm making now
http://desuarchive.org/int/statistics/image-reposts/

>>79484219
there was a moment there where that gator had a good shot at chomping down on his dome

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>>79484575
I see (You)

>>79484619
bit slow there mate

>>79484635
lekka snaaks

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>>79484623

>>79484591
>>79484619
I was worried sick

>>79484667
utterly bizarre

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cb8Xmifo6F0

thought the scratcha dva show on radar was only tunes but he's talking and stuff this isnt interesting

>>79484616
Nobody goes to Borough Markt for actual food lmao

It's a tourist casual dining destination laddo

>>79484703
Radar (Sports Direct Radio) is a meme my dude

listening to the gathering while high and drunk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0ESLglr640
x

What if there is a point to life but we just haven't found it yet?
Let's all start looking lads... if we find the meaning of life that will surely put /brit/ on the map

>>79484702
>53 minutes
sorry i already watched a film a few weeks ago

describe how you picture the average britposter
be creative so im banning the words paki and fedora

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h5N46T_epNA

>>79484774
it's to have a good ol' time of it mate, nothing more

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have a headache

wish mum would stop singing

>>79484781
something like ribena but with more class

>>79484726
I struggled to find normal sized supermarkets in london, let alone niche things like functional markets.

I'd say the diference with london is that you will have everything, but not necessarily closeby. you can't say go to the street vendor for your mushrooms and then buy your thai fish suace 5 minutes away.

find early-middle aged women disgusting for some reason, middle-aged are fine though

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>>79484781

ok what I don't understand is why I want to be kicked in the balls by a girl but it hurts so much when I punch them myself
all I want is to feel the impact of a girls foot, fist, knee, thigh on my bollocks but when I squeeze them myself I give up after a few seconds

a few punches and I'm done, how the fuck do I increase my pain tolerance? I stretch them out with my left hand and squeeze/punch them with my right but after a minute I'm done and I feel winded, they both ache and my cock goes soft
but then I watch another ballbusting video and I get the urge to hit them again so I punch them again till but I give up after a even less time

The Israelis are now hosting the daily stormer

>>79484781
south asian man in a trilby

>>79484781
>pale
>skinny-fat, fat or underweight
>unhealthy looking owing to poor diet
>shit hair
>Clothes from Topman/River Island/SuperDry/Asos
>slightly outperformed the average at a young age, but lacked ambition and dedication (subscribes to the 'smart but lazy' meme as a cope)
>lives a pretty dismal life in some provincial town, watches TV nightly and goes down spoons on the weekend

>>79484781
5'8, glasses, overweight, gay, hates himself, is intelligent but has never really applied himself, works in a call centre

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>>79484781

lets see some naughty webms

>>79484801
Yes, and I'm glad I'm mates with ppl on /brit/ ;)

Halo 3 lads :(

>>79484849
had an early middle aged gf whilst in my early 20s. was pretty alright. don't think i could handle an actual middle-aged - though i'd love to shag a few.

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>>79484909

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>>79484781
average expat poster

>5.45am alarm for the gym

wew

>>79484909
watch before the mods delete it

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>>79484909

>>79484941
like this meme.

>>79484923
why halo to you too m8

>>79484952
my reaction time is really slow kek

>>79484934
surely there is a more efficient way

>>79484990
Not without getting it all over their nose

manchester mitchell <3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKJLqpQAF-8

>>79484990
I have a boxer and he just fucking plants his whole muzzle in the bowl

>>79484990
that's probably super efficient actually

>>79484934
god dog's are disgusting

>>79485005
cute girl in the thumbnail looks like bilbo

>>79485023
Rasheed

>>79484934
god i wish that were me

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>god dog's are disgusting

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>>79484794
wish i had an encyclopaedic knowledge of eastern female athlete gold medal winners from the 20th century

https://youtu.be/WwSRa8vZoGQ?t=457
choon

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https://twitter.com/metpoliceuk/status/905689888149917696
love pakis me, mad lads

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any austrian man in

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>>79484898
literally me apart from the last line

Proper clamming for a shag x

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one side is peng

>>79485126
love muslims
https://twitter.com/V_of_Europe/status/906585405553876992

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>>79484990

>want to invest in Bitcoin/crypto but I'm too low IQ

Chiar daca nu-ti va pasa, te voi iubi si asa.

>>79485182
its tanking rn fammo, good time

>tfw down a grand in a few weeks

>>79485138
jew

>>79485162
does it need liz on it twice?

>>79485182
same, canny mae heed n'tail offit

>>79485182
this is satire yeah
guessing its like those 'dora posts
anyone can invest in crypto or any other shitcoin, a retard could do it which is why I invested in ethereum in march

BORN
IN TO A PACK
THERE'S NO CHOICE
BUT TAKE ORDERS TO ATTACK
LOCKED UP IN CHAINS
I GET FED
BUT THE HUNGER STILL REMAINS
NOT CONTENT TO LIVE THIS WAY
BEING LEAD BY THE BLIND
GOT TO PLAN MY DISPERSAL
TIME TO LEAVE THEM ALL BEHIIINNNDDD
BREAKING OUT OF MY CHAINS
NOTHING VENTURED NOTHING GAINED
I'M MY OWN MASTER NOW
BEAR THE MARK OF MY SCARS
SHEDDING BLOOD UNDERNEATH THE STARS
BUT I WILL SURVIVE SOMEHOW

>>79485138
sociology of economics

>>79485249
lost you after same

gave up on looking for a chinkphone

just going to buy a samsung or something

>>79485287
buy a huawei

>he doesn't have an iphone
cringe

Peom:
Why are they called smartphones,
If all there doing is making the users dumb?

any marxist man in

is there any use for the cum once ive finished the wank? really hate to waste it

>>79485162
Why Jane Austen? Could have had actually interesting women, like Mary Anning, or if it had to be an author Virginia Woolf. But why replace Darwin with Jane Austen?

london is fucking shit

any colored man in

>>79485306
overpriced chinkphone

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Photi in another photi

>>79485343
alri deano

>>79485343
got an iphone 4 still lel

do yanks on /brit/ have british ancestry or are they here for the bloodshed?

getting some bladder pain

oh dear

>>79485398
Sumcunt wnty enlighten me y burds take a photi then put the same photi twice into the wan photi so theres two eh the same photi in wan photi

>>79485343
hello 2010

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cg_PvNLm5XE

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oioi

>>79485426
mate

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>why yes i am going to preorder the iphone x

>>79485440
I would also like to know this

>>79485428
literally every white american has some british ancestry
am here for the gimmicks

>>79485463
might become a paedo hunter, seems like an exciting life

>>79485468
its not broken or anything
works fine iah

>REALLY cannot be arsed with work tomorrow

RRREEEEEE

>>79485483
don't see how that's possible

>>79485464
>British Virgin Islands
why did they name some islands after me lol x

used a galaxy s3 for years, what an utter piece of shit. thank fuck we have advanced

Changing my name to Gujareet

gonna be a train driver

hope one of u cunts jumps in front of my train so i can pretend to be traumatized and get a 2 year paid holiday

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yet another twitter screenshot

>>79485543
stay strong trains is hard job

just took 7 nytol one a nights to get high

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>colleague's cousin is a depressive shut-in, possibly mentally unstable
>her mother is worried about her and asked my colleague (her one good, upstanding nephew) to try and find a date for her
>colleague asked me if I could take her out
>I said yes because I have nothing better to do
>got her number, called her and will be taking her to dinner tomorrow

What am I in for lads?

>>79485531
what are you on now?

>>79485543
good job

>>79485506
I know that feel. Couple of weeks in a row now that Thursday's felt like Friday, only for me to realise halfway through, that I still have a day and a half before the weekend.

>>79485566
fresh haircut

>>79485584
its shit, just get some 2c-b or something

>>79485598
coke, benzos and speed

Anyone got any melodic bluegrass like this but without the metal

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNVVPzjQzI0

>>79485594
FONT

>>79485628
yea thanks for asking

>>79485566
Literally me except my eyes are blue, my hair is shorter and blond, my skin is pale, I don't wear facial hair, and my nose is less prominent.

>>79485598
some 'budget' motorla which is fantastic, huge battery, buttery smooth

will people still be talking about theo walcott's potential when he's 35?

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>>79485602
I'm on the midweek weekend

>>79485493

yes berating fat confused men in gainsborough town centre sounds exciting

>>79485621
good lad

literally me tomorrow

>>79485640
Share it then nonce

>>79485463
>over an hour berating the guy
they must really get a kick out of it. power feels good

>>79485643
I have the S7 and I think it's pretty damn good

>>79485543

why don't they just close their eyes lmao

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g54aPmNjMM4

>china literally went from shithole to first world in 50~ years

>britain is literally in a worse state than it was 50 years ago

Where did we go so wrong lads? Oh wait I know where, democracy.

>>79485566
slight ptosis on left eye, probably related to forest whitaker best arrest that black bastard aye

>>79485702
yeah well i cant afford that so FOB

>>79485594
sounds like an incredibly awkward situation if the girl is self-aware and depressed

>>79485712
China largely abandoned socialist policies while we embraced them?

>>79485712
>first world

Howling

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that blonde on the right looks bangin, you can tell she proper wants it n all look at her

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Wish I was a hillbilly/ redneck making moonshine and playing banjos

>>79485566
they're so ugly
would love to administer the camps we're gonna put them in

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*accosts you in halifax train station*

EXCUSE ME MATE, CAN YOU EXPLAIN WHY YOU'VE ARRANGED TO MEET WHAT YOU BELIEVE TO BE A 14 YEAR OLD GIRL FOR SEX?

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imagine having something like this

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Guys I thought I was English but it turns out I don't have a drop of English blood, I don't know what to do with my life now.

>>79485643
Same here. I usually get a full day of whatever I want on a full charge. And because I didn't need a contract to get the phone itself I've got a cheap monthly deal for data, unlimited texting and 500 minutes.

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feels good to live in the *COUGH* *COUGH* first world *WHEEZE*

t-thanks Mao

>>79485726
It might be but I'm usually pretty good with taking charge with less social people, especially one-on-one. In a group or with proper extroverts I don't do as well.

Any advice? I haven't been on a date in years, and never with a depressive.

>>79483953
dijon mustard is spicier than almost any '''spicy''' asian food

>>79485786
*glazed look*
dunno what you're talkin about m8 swear to god

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any fashy strassy lads in

>>79485831
You mean English Mustard?

>>79485788
imagine all the insects

no thank you

>>79485758
>ywn be duey crowe completely without responsibility
>ywn fuck hookers in a caravan with no care in the world
>ywn think you had your kidneys stolen and end up robbing half a dozen stores and finally realise you had them the entire time when you manage to piss

Got 40 GB of data left lads

>>79485831
dijon mustard is far from spicy what are you on

>>79485786
FIFTEE- FOU- No THIRTEEN YEAR OLD FRENCH GIRL aND SHIT

>>79485786
wouldn't the best strategy for the nonces to literally say nothing till the police arrive? don't get why they start talking.

oi lads watch this

*stands up and does a little dance with a cheeky grin on my face*

waheyyyyy

>>79485817
are we gonna sit here and pretend the industrial revolution wasn't a thing? it's a necessary phase for development

>>79485801
not yours
some yank mutt

>>79485842
>le hitler lite ideology
nazbol or nowt

>>79485801
these DNA tests are a psyop to uproot Europeans spiritually from their homeland

>>79485842
Looks like a Minecraft clan logo

>>79485594
good luck, mate

holding my thumbs that she's a pretty girl and that you'll have a fun weekend

>>79485788
probably an absolute headache to maintain.

>>79485788
supremely comfy

>>79485854
just close the windows nigga like use nets haha

>>79485855
Dickie Bennett is my fav character. Gonna post a webm

>>79485891
Yeah how about that

*walks away and talks to someone more interesting*

>>79485788
looks like absolute shit, your worse than the people that go to homebase or some other shit retail park with a bunch of shit replicated "love/home" signs and the shit pictures, plates, baskets and other junk no one would actually want unless they were a woman

China could have HS2 designed and built within a year, it's fucking hilarious seeing how pathetic the UK government is, can't even build a simple high speed rail line in a decade

No wonder this country is going to shit

im not a menace to society god damn it societys a menace to me!

>>79485915
why do women like this stuff?
it mystifies me

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>mfw I see a fourteen year old french girl

>sun coming up
fucking horrid
dawn is the worst time of the day bar none

AHEM

*dances with more purpose*

love dawn simple as

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOUqVuNzkA8

>>79485915
Why yes I do want to be cramped into some shitty british yellow brick dire hellhole

>>79485965
ill heem you

>>79485956
>>79485965
vicar of dibley was a classic

>>79485971
!!

i'm heading for my trunk if you're tripping

I have made a discovery lads. Women like it when you're mean to them.

I've been at a house party on Wednesday night and I've been a right rude cunt to some girls and they just giggled and seemed into me because of it.

I'm assuming this only applies to women around the same level of attractiveness as you or lower (the ones from yesterday weren't lookers).

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my man snowden

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>there are actual British girls in this thread RIGHT NOW laughing at your posts

>>79485608
my 2cb arrived today. 5 pills. gunna save them for a good time.

what's your experience with them? i've heard conflicting reports. some people feel nothing, some people feel nauseous, others get a great trip.

>>79486032
no there aren't

>>79486032
not your posts though mate.

>>79486032
if there are, I challenge them to post their feet to prove it

>>79486032
no there aren't
you're full of shit
get out

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>mfw I've catalogued every single anti-social comment ITT and will be submitting the file to the relevant authorities and there's not a single thing anyone can do about it

>>79486032
no im not

>>79486032
need them to lurk all over my bollocks

CHOON
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z0DO0XyS8Ko

what film shall I watch this evening /brit/?

>>79486028
>enemy of the state
>picture of a jew
NAH UVE TAKEN THIS WAY TOO FAR U FUCKEN RACUST

bums

the absolute state

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vho1vPZN_c

>>79486064
puttering around my garden at this

>>79486075
going to ask my romanian friend what they meant by this

>>79486032
hahaha what a loser

>>79486056
this one too

>>79486072
hi handsome :*

>>79486075
It's literally a Tim and Eric skit

>>79486119
PLEASE verbally heem my bollocks to oblivion

>>79486090
hes a zionist whose parents were irish immigrants

>>79486075
AAAA YUKA YUUU

Got home and mum has left the cats indoors all day while I'm at work so obviously they have pissed, shit and vomited on everything

She's now bitching to her slag mates that I'm in a rage because I was pissed off

Actually going to collectively chin the three of them. Thank fuck I'm moving out or I would actually murder her

>>79486142
'you do realise x, right' is the quintessential virgin post

how do I stop wanting to hit myself in my balls?

>>79486142
you do realise that the right post is pure projection, right?

>>79486080
dofus - livre 1: julith

>>79486142
heh that id

>have no other choice but to grow out shit beard to hide my already weak chin genetics
ah yes the so called genetic lottery

>>79486188
hi virgin hahhaahahah

>>79486169
things have escalated since the scotch egg debacle

>>79486206
get a chin implant

>>79486169
haha classic mum

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I genuinely look exactly like him, I'm in fear for my life

>>79486224
i'll implant my fist in your chin in a minute you waster

>>79486224
sure thing
how many bitcoins is that?

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>>79483904
new landaboi$ album

>>79486206
currently doing this

>>79486239
*calls 999*

>>79486235
non whites are so fucking ugly

>>79486235
fuck me that girl is a 9/10
lucky paki bastard

>>79486258
fuck off manlet

>>79486258
Iceland is a nation of bastards

>>79486274
>>79486274
>>79486274
New

>>79486235
>drunk

absolutely haram

>>79486284
I am not a manlet mehmet