/brit/

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on the bus lads

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ARE LAUREN

The 'off to work lads' lad is about to post

Off to the GP in an hour lads. Hope my eye does need to go.

>aussie edition

No thanks

>>78041813
m-m-might need to wank now

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Think I might buy my mum a puppy for her birthday

She's already got 2 great danes and doesn't want another dog but I want another dog so

Maybe I'll buy her a kitten instead, they're easy

Would great danes get along with a cat?

>>78041855
If my son got me a dog when I said no I'd fucking throttle the cunt.

>>78041855
>Would great danes get along with a cat?
that cat would heem them daily

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>>78041873
cat would get banged out in an instance

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Boss (female) wants me at the ballpit in an hour for my performance review + cookies

>>78041912
Why are numales so childish

>omg a terrorist attack
>this is like voldemart vs harry potter

>>78041861
Bretty much this

I did it lads, I stayed relatively sober last night and I'm not starting the week a hungover mess

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>>78041936
this is how western industry remains at the cutting edge

>>78041912
Thats google hq in Dublin.

she said yes, lads

she said no, lads

he said maybe, lads

doin a listen to Dash Berlin and thinking about her lads

Lads where do I find a cara gf? I want a tomboy

>>78042001
Grindr and the right filters

>>78041996
>Dash Berlin
German radio?

on the train still

almost to copenhagen
cant wait to connect to Wifi and enjoy my shiny new Danish flag

>>78042005
DO NOT WANT ANY PENIS ATTACHED

>>78042016
That's the fun bit desu

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>IF I WERE YOU
>ID DARE NOT SPEAK
>ID RUN LIKE HELL
>IN HOPES OF SEEING TOMORROW

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Off to work after 2 weeks holidays. Might genuinely off myself.

Bit mental thinking that there are indeed at least a few female /brit/ regulars.

Not feeling very good lads

Going to take another day off work

>>78042009

Enjoyed posting as a dumb yank when I was in America.

>>78041813
Austria is a great country.

"Oi! G'day mate!"

HES A 20TH CENTURY BOYYY

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>>78042044
>>78042052
>tfw neet

Thought of an AMAZING idea lads: demographic taxes

LGBT coloured women get 70% off tax
LGBT coloured men get 60% off tax
LGBT or coloured women get 50% off tax
LGBT or coloured men get 40% off tax
straight white women get 10% off tax
straight white men pay an extra 70% tax

tfw no british bf

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I'm moving to Chicago from SoCal next month, going to go live with madre
I'm gonna go from a nice Californian summer to a cold snap winter with snow and more niggers than you could count

I wish I was able to say I'll miss this place but I have a feeling I'm going to dread the cold and the 2000% increase in niggardry

>>78042093
I'll just pretend to be a bender

>>78042113
You'll get fined for fraud and tax evasion sweetie

>>78042110
Which city or county?

>>78042119
How would they prove it

got called a munter in asda

>>78042110
There are plenty of Mexicans like you in Chicago though.

>>78042124
You would never be able to let it known that you've had sex with a wo-

oh wait you'll be fine then mate

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Morning lads

>>78042140
exactly

>>78042079
how much bennies do you get?
t. wagie-to-neet tranny

>>78042122
don't know exactly but some Northern Chicago suburb

>>78042130
not a CHI

>>78042148
So future Britain will be virgins, coloured, LGBT and poverty-striken white men.


hmmmmmmm

>>78042160
>using the term madre
>not a CHI
poser

>>78042156
none I just left the military and have no job

>>78042161
Sounds like australia

>>78042173
xcuse me swotty but the average brit is poorer than the average aussie

>>78042180
if you say so runt

BEHOLD

yay monday looking forward to wasting another week and having nothing to do at the weekend and hating myself and my life #14yearoldedgelordbuttrue

Why do pakis love cats and Aussies so much?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jba_Fofi
spooky

>>78042093
No, because this lets rich benders and non whites have it easy
Should be a steep progressive income tax with a maximum income above a certain point

>>78042193
alri Royal Mail vet

>>78042193
Straya is after Norway, Swiss and Luxembourg in personal wealthyness isn't it?

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>>78042211
Not a paki and I love kots

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>>78042222
at least I still have my security clearance I guess

>>78042240
alri abdul

>>78042172
Every millennial in California knows basic Spanish, plus my first couple jobs were loaded with illegals who couldn't speak English so yeah I say shit like "no bueno" and "Madre", cunt

good morning britainese
what kind of tea do you drink at the breakfast?
i drink the "English Breakfast tea" without milk and sugar at every morning.

>>78042251
foy

>>78042259
I don't drink tea

1 glass of jersey gold top milk

I am from the USA.

>>78042259
Yorkshire Dales is my personal staple tea blend

>>78042129
Tell us what happened lad.

>>78042259
Thompsons Belfast tea.

>>78042273
sorry

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>>78042259
pay out the nose for this but by gum its worth it

don't for ONE MOMENT believe bolt isn't doping as well

the nice lady on one news seven sharp is gone
turns out she was standing in for some bint on maternity leave
gutted

>>78042292
>i-i'm desperately trying to fit in on /brit/

>>78042317
t. me in 2015
its since become a genuine fixation

>>78042294
no fucking shit sherlock
literally every single athlete above university team level is doping, and that is not an exaggeration

Scraped my foot trying to hurdle over a fence lol

>>78042272
>milk
many japanese have stomach ache by drinking milk.
fortunately i can drink the milk. ;)

>>78042275
>>78042284
nice one. also i love Irish Breakfast tea. (but its without milk and sugar)

>>78042340
proofs

got my bennies sanctioned lads

>>78042294
what's the matter white boi, can't admit were physically superior?

thoughts on global warming?

>>78042251
soon you'll have to learn more than that

>>>/s4s/5662468
>>>/s4s/5662468
>>>/s4s/5662468
howling

>>78042374
Gives us an excuse to genocide the Scots and turn Scotland into the powerhouse it was always intended to be if Scots hadn't settled it

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Have you lifted yet today lads?

>>78042374
haven't really noticed it

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tried the protein powder with oatmeal
verdict: not good

>>78041861
Im a good judge of character and that bobby with the handle 'stache looks like a good man

>>78042374
real
hopefully lab grown meat helps

>>78042417
The Jews are being controlled by Satan. No one can tell me otherwise.
They're spreading the disease of infecting people with bad spirits.
We know that Jesus will rise again soon to cast out these demons once they become too large in numbers.

>>78042417
Nah lad. On holiday and even then it's a rest day.
Mondays at my gym are mobbed. So I do Tuesday/wed/Thur/fri

>>78042417
That pic is such utter bollocks
Genuinely baffling that people believe this stuff

>>78042417
>We possess several hundred atomic warheads and rockets and can launch them at targets in all directions, perhaps even at Rome
>israel on nuclear weapons
thousands of years later they STILL hate rome

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saving up sperm for the big day

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ate a banana
verdict: unripe

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4chan pass expired lads

>>78042474
do you not fucking have eyes

captcha: calle mautby

>>78042476
grim

>>78042476
Runt

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>>78042485
was completely yellow but didn't have the correct taste

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>>78042465
Stop worshipping the King of the Israelites

>>78042417
haha got real serious at the end there

failed my statistics exam today x

>reparations for slavery? not a chance! punish not the son for the sins of the father
>the jews crucified jesus 2000 years ago? they must be stopped!

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the moons real bright tonight, don't even need the porch light

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>japan stopped making affordable sports cars

Two 10am job interviews this week and I work 9-5. No idea how I'll be able to cover up the fact I'm going to interviews

>Yeah boss I take 10am lunches this week haha

fuck's sake I woke up alive again

>>78042518
Miss Christchurch.

>>78042551
don't believe you

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the runtcave

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>>78042518
Enjoying retirement, John?

>>78042548
Doctors appointments. Imply you have a really horrid STD and don't want to discuss it further

>>78042508
Don't worry lad just try harder next time. Stats sucks ey, first year?

>>78042547
Gt86 and nd miata exist tho...

>>78042559
tidy

>>78042551
how do you wake up dead

>>78042547
The song's not called Running In The Nineties for nothing, Habib

>>78042551
I'd be impressed i you could wake up dead

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>>78042568
aye

I don't think Iactually failed but it was a proper shitshow nonetheless

>>78042559
looks like a typical shitty company secrutiy office, spent a lot of my time in those.

>>78042574
both slow as shit

>>78042595
the runt

>>78042584
>>78042589
well if I woke up dead I wouldn't have made a post saying I woke up alive would I

>>78042600
Straight line speed is a meme. If you want that, get a Kawasaki.

>>78042584
>>78042589
*burp* the afterlife's not real mo*burps*ry, I'm a pickle, I'm pickle riiiiiiiiii*burps*iick

>>78042616
PICKLE RIIIIIICK

goodnight reddit

>>78042594
I got 50 for STAT1001 and never looked back

I got 70 for STAT2014 when I realised I could just do all the example exams over and over for days until I got 100 on all of them.

>>78042611
my mums corolla is faster than both

>>78042616
>>78042620
State of you cunts

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For me, its the Suzuki Sidekick

need a runt that makes me food and tea in the mornings

>>78042650
Ubereats will bring you mcdonalds

>>78042650
Yeah but it's not the same as a real ru...
>Uber drivers
Nah yeah fair point

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>>78042650
>his mum doesnt make him tea every day

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Based

business idea: slave trade

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business idea:
do a sex with rami malek

Richard E. Grant is the quinessential Brit gent.
So charming.
Vienna episode again

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Why do the English have to have such sexy voices? It isn't fair.

Homemade teasmade's doing a treat
Got to iron out the kinks with the homemade handjobmade tho

>>78042693
but it's free market cancer
that makes it good

>>78042693
ahh yes the runt circle

>>78042716
>>he doesn't like kinky handjobs

poof

>>78042708
bit gay

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>used to fugg a girl that would send me Salon articles saying "this is my life"
>find out after I stop fuggin her
>she was a Jew
every fucking time man

>tfw cutie I met at the club was super keen
>Seems uninterested via text

Rreeee

>>78042710
Literally an African
Personally I like whoever that cockney geezer was that did the seal on Finding Dory

>>78042735
the runt courtship

>yo nigga thot up in da club
>>>/facebook/

>>78042737
He is African. A proper colonial.

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Wow....

>>78042758
srs question
is there anything morally wrong with joining one of these upper class drinking societies at Oxbridge?

>>78042766
No, but you will be expected to commit crimes and have parents rich and well-connected enough to get you out of them.

>>78042758
David Cameron also did an 'fact finding mission' to south africa.

Tories low key loved apartheid

taking vocaroo requests

>>78042766
Not in itself, no. Some of the things they reportedly did as members of the club though....

>>78042786
tell me about tetris

>>78042778
say

"FOY"

>>78042778
A full cover of Despacito

>>78042778
PICKLE RICK !!!

£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€£$€

sneed's fuck and suck

pickle rick

why did he pretend to shoot them then put them in the back of the plane.

surely the guys could have then made some noise to indicate they had not really been thrown out, which would have undermined what he was doing?

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Desperately need a british man to bully me while he stuffs me with his cream colored cock.

formerly chuck's pick and rick

>>78042830
>>78042817
>>78042805
>>78042793
>>78042775
>>78042763
>>78042756
>>78042738
>>78042724
>>78042709
>>78042695
>>78042684
>>78042666
take this autist back

>>78042836
he could of played it off as muscle spasms after death
but I agree, shooting someone before throwing them out of a plane is not the brightest of ideas

>>78042841
no

>>78042845
>Muscle spasms
no because he'd pretended to throw them out of a plane.

>>78042851
hmm alrite then

>>78042831
>>78042822
>>78042810
>>78042808
>>78042778
>>78042746
>>78042737
>>78042730
>>78042719
>>78042716
>>78042713
>>78042699
>>78042693
>>78042688
>>78042635
>>78042630
>>78042626
>>78042611
>>78042608
>>78042600
>>78042594
>>78042585
>>78042574
>>78042568
>>78042561
>>78042548
>>78042547
>>78042545
>>78042518
>>78042508
>>78042500
>>78042498
>>78042493
>>78042491
>>78042485
>>78042476
>>78042474
You need to fuck off elsewhere. Thanks.

>>78042836
literally taken me until right now to realise thats what he was doing
thought the gunshot was just to scare the first perp into speaking up, then "he didnt fly so good" was yank talk for "he's not cooperating"

>>78042860
hmmm no dont think so sweetie

>>78042860
Shut up.

>>78042857
but once he silenced them he could then pretend he threw them out, it wouldn't be hard with all the noise going around at the time

ah yes
the autismo anti-aussie capital-letters dogrunt
britains answer to liam

why didn't you put something on the end of it

>>78042866
but didn't he want the others to believe he'd been thrown out?

which he could have dispelled in the back of the plane by making a noise.

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EVERYBODY SHUT UP AND STOP LINKING NINE MILLION OTHER POSTS

>>78042875
yeah probably, just saying i didnt realise that was his intention until you pointed it out

>>78042877
disgusting little runt of an actress

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>>78042836
he didn't think so good!

>>78042837
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1CR54iu2Iiv
this is for all the benders out there

what I don't get is why he didn't want to bring friends in the first place? surely there was enough room on the plane, and he clearly had the power to call it in, as done so later

>>78042836
Because he's not cold blooded. Shooting someone in the head before throwing them out a plane is more humane than throwing someone out of the plane and have them fall a mile+ to a horrible death. (Plus the horribleness of feeling yourself falling to your death.).

CIA guy could have easily had a reason ready.

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Where's the diversity in this advert?

>>78042836
>surely the guys could have then made some noise to indicate they had not really been
Would you? I mean it's probably better to co-operate under the circumstances. Besides, they were aware of the plan, risking actually getting shot for making noise isn't smart.

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>>78042915
the flight plan only listed one of them

>>78042923
Look at her. She's clearly got Irish genetics.
Irish aren't white.

haven't had 3 meals in one day in weeks

>>78042774

Meanwhile Corbyn wants us to pay taxes to the British state. A state that uses its powers to track our movements, police our speech, and kill people like they did in Grenfell.

Paying taxes to the British state is like buying South African grapefruit during apartheid.

>>78042962
>Kill people like Glenfell
>Mozzies
>People
You're too cute.

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ARE LAUREN

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>>78042982

>>78042962
everyone wants us to pay taxes to tthe british state and all that policing of movements and speech has been tory-driven/.

>>78042982
>>78042995
what's her deal?

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>>78042995
not nice

>>78042860
why do you persecute me so?

>>78043005
she's just milking braindead rorkes for attention and money.

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at work

the yapping normbles are a fucking earsore

I fucking hate normbles so much. their fucking vapid automatons rathon than sapient beings I swear

fucking hate work

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The flight plan I just filed with the agency lists:

Smee
Maimen
Button Lee
Juan Aviéu
"Fast Owen" Tattaq
Gitstus Taeion
Maier Kraft
Hugh Pediéu
Tughrab di Qatar
Paul
Heidi Dinn
Flass O'Goode
Howance Tàuterai
Nëhst
Tillmie á Bouté
Bane
Veidoû Sïwere
Damasc
Allah Dalai al-Teih
Frau Haìrdegon
(bane is dumb. he thinks seeyaiyay speak engly)
Atlee Sioux
Kantaaq
Hugh Aeiou
(more bane)
Irfah Boulte
Tatov
Willy Uday
(bane)
Yuri Bigaev
(bane)
Voss Göeting
Chaôute
Partov Īplaan
(bane)
Will Khäng
Roche U.
"Lesions" Yagat
Hieselv Kòutê
Nâvou Watts
Dan Echsteppe
Auvia Masze
"Tupple" Anne

>>78043031
i hate my work because i have very little to do there.

i spend about ONE hour actually working and the rest of the time sat there pretendign to look busy and reading news websites or random wikipedia articles..

>>78043005
don't know just don't pay attention to her

fucking abnormies always being a creep on their phones but when you ask if they have Facebook or something they just say "I don't do social media"

>>78043031
where do you work

*stares at phone*
I don't do social media

>>78043052
why would you hate this?

I'm so fucking jealous of you, I work in a call centre so I'm on the phones for fucking 8 hours a day nonstop no fucking respite

I hate phones j hate talking I hate peiple. this job is driving me insane

political ideology
did you have a pet when you were younger or now`
what kind

>>78043052
i spent my days doing very intense physical work in the beating sun and am envious of your current position

the grass is always greener on the other side

is 4chan social media

>>78043073
how desperate do you have to be to work in a call centre

>>78043084
if you're a tripfag

>>78043079
Traditional conservatism
Many pets.. goldfish, cats, dogs.

>>78043079
rorke
yes
snake

>>78043084
yeah
*sends you a friend request*

>>78043073
because i sittign there pretending to look busy but not actually being busy is annoying.

i'd prefer not to sit there for 8 hours strraight reading the guardian, dailymail and an article about the roman legionnaires. because that isn't what i'd do if it were not for work.

>>78043084
its a media board
where you talk to other people about whatever

so yes

>>78043079
socialist
never

>>78043096
just ask for more work then

>the day after a hangover

born a new man

>>78043085
I got the job last year as part of an apprenticeship after leaving sixth form

I was TOLD it was "administration and customer service" not "pure customer service day in day out"

I've finished the apprenticeship now and I'm going to start looking for new jobs in September time but I don't know what my luck will be like desu. if I can't get a new job by the end of the year I'm just gonna fucking quit. noone my age should be wasting their time doing this garbage

>>78043079
theocratic socialist
yeah
dog and cats

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=11899545

looks like australia has a new deadly mystery animal in town lads

>>78043108
>just ask for more work then
Nah.

my point is: not working > being at work but not doing anything > working

>>78043079
alt right
yes
cats

>>78043079
radical centrist
ye
tortoise and a rabbit

>>78043096
What do you do? You can make work for yourself.

ah yes working from home today

might not start for another hour or so

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>theocratic socialist

>>78043123
yeah but if you're bored anyway why not invest a bit of effort in your career

Finnish gf is pining for me

>>78043079
marxist futurist
corn snake

thinking about giving this rotisserie chicken the ol' in n out if you catch my drift

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>tfw 21 and never had a job

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wanted to get a tortoise when i was 14 but my dad said it would be too highmaintenance so we got a cat instead

>>78043131
sort of a data analyst.

>>78043158
please explain

>>78043160
practice your firm handshakes m8 they did the trick for an entire generation of boomers

>>78043129
post bunny x

just walk in and give him a firm handshake

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>about to be 24
>no drivers licence
end me lads

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>>78043160
>tfw 24 and the same
>tfw it doesnt affect my job prospects one jot
feels good to be a Tarquin

the general public should NOT be allowed to vote, they are too uneducated and easily manipulated by the mass media

>>78043177
they're dead dave
they're all dead

i've never met a female whom i would consider even close to my intellectual equal

go ahead and get your fedoras out, doesn't change the fact that all women are morons

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>>78043160
>tfw 23 and never needed as job

>>78043182
christ
know a few people like you, all failures

>been waiting to head out and do some chores for days now
>torrential rain again

>>78043169
Hmm, perhaps not then. Unless you can figure out a way to make something that improves/streamlines what you do.

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http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-40826062

hm
maybe Brexit wasnt such a bad idea after all

>>78043188
why are 66% of all university graduates in the western world women then sweetie

thinking of buying a boat on credit and engaging in high seas piracy

>>78043188
my maths teacher in primary school was a woman
seemed fairly smart to me

>>78043202
was thinking about just using my spare time to learn skills but the problem is the workflow is too sporadic.

I might be doing nothing for 5 hours and then suddenly get a task which will take 16 hours to complete.

>>78043213
there comes a point in every young man's life when he thinks about spitting on his hands and hoisting the black flag

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>>78043183
>>78043189

business idea: refine sugar

women have on average a higher IQ than men

but they also have less variance, so there are many more male geniuses (and retards) than female.

business idea: redefine sugar

>>78043208
falling for the uni meme is more indicative of stupidity than intelligence these days

>>78043239
Women absorb and permanently assimilate a small amount the genetic material of men who cum in them. This accounts for things like competence in the arts and sciences amongst women who otherwise would not be able to hold a level playing field with men

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>>78043249
t. graduate from the university of LIFE

>>78043202
you can call the king a bender you fucking bent twat

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>falling for the uni meme is more indicative of stupidity than intelligence these days

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F E E T
E
E
T

engagement is a swizz, lads
she gets a £2 grand ring and I get to hear about wedding plans for the next 2 years

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>>78043252

>>78043249
University is fine provided you know what you want to get out of it, by the end.

too many people go into university trying to study something they enjoy without really looking into the prospects of actually doing that in a professional context is. that goes for everyone from STEM people to humanities.

>>78043260
t. unemployed stem graduate 30k in debt

>>78043268
if your wife isn't willing to settle for a £200 cubic zircona ring, she's not a keeper bro

went for a half hour walk in perfect walking weather
feel very refreshed

>>78043268
>tfw really want to do just a cheap low key wedding
>tfw the gf has a princess complex and won't roll with that

ffs.

>>78043288
t. pasty runt who works in his dads construction """business"""

>>78043293
she said she would've said yes to an empty box but obviously I wouldn't do that, I'm not povvo

>>78043298
unlucky, mine's a conservative country bumpkin and has her eyes on a church/marquee combo

>>78043312
>>78043312
>>78043312


new


>>78043312
>>78043312
>>78043312

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had a cheeky idea:
get the bf a meteorite ring if we ever decide to marry

cause he loves space and they only cost like £700
heh heh heh

>>78043268
genuinely baffled how people spend so much on weddings
my parents had a tiny cheap ceremony that cost almost nothing over 20 years ago and they're still married

>>78043288
t. "self-employed" when anyone asks (read: sits at his computer all day in a dark room meticulously transcribing business ideas from /brit/ and evaluating their economic potential)

>>78042272
Swear down if you're an apprentice