/cum/

Yup, and there's nothing you can do to stop us.

need your best strategies for getting a gf

help me out here, /cum/mers

>>77628524
be nice and friendly

>>77628534

tried that, went 0-3

>>77628543
I use that strategy and reject girls all the time. feels bad to break a heart and its difficult because they see me being nice as being interesting and get their hopes up

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official thread song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrLh66wwbzE

>>77628524
say hi

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>>77628502
Good thing I'm going to college for a business degree when the new semester starts, I'll be the next Don Draper, you'll see

>>77628586

you lost me

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>>77628602
you'll be here before you know it

>>77628502

Business students are the worst. If you aren't STEM you may as well go to trade school.

>>77628611

I cant break the ice though

cara isn't a bad person, it's just her fanbase and followers who are the fucking worst

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made a picture

>>77628625

"please" stop acknowledging that faggot's existence here.

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Rick:
>"Its-its-its the Jews, Morty."

>You gotta be*UUURRP* careful about the Jews!"

>"I-I've been to over 2000 different universes M-Morty and the Jews own over half of them."

Morty:
>"But that's, that's imposs-possible Rick, they are only like, uh, a small percentage of the population. Gee Rick, don't you uh remember like what uh happened last time with the holocaust and the 6 million or something?

Rick
>"T-thats where you're*BURRP* wrong Morty. What do they teach you in that school of yours? How to be a *farts* cuck?"

>"H-h-here, watch this documentary I found on Youtube. It will catch you up to pace, Morty. The white man will *UURRP* rise again, Morty. Trust me, I've been to that timeline.”

>>77628625
This could be said for most celebrities 2bh.

>>77628625
who is the fanbase?

>>77628627

i only reply because you spend time on it

its shit

never post it again

got a filtered reply
might read it

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>>77628627
LMFAO

>>77628636
first time ive ever talked about that guy fuck off

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>>77628640
>The white man will *UURRP* rise again, Morty. Trust me, I've been to that timeline.

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>>77628627
holy shit man that's really good. you should draw family circus in the paper.

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Met my gook gf's family. Food was great. Her brother was giving me dirty looks all night kek.

>>77628653

i was kidding

is a really funny picture

>>77628627

This is how I imagine the stereotypical east-coaster to look like.

>>77628679
He knows what awaits the future of your hapa children

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>dating a gook

>>77628689
t. mexifornian

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>This is how I imagine the stereotypical east-coaster to look like.

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what game are u guys playin
for me it's thug pro
i am famous on it

>>77628694
>Having children with a gook
He can sit there and watch me destroy his sisters pucci while he jerks off to animes

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i deserve a gf (asian)

>>77628698
She's pretty cool 2bh. She cleans my apartment and has sex with me.

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>>77628712

wish my audio would stop dying

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Some of you have an unhealthy obsession with me

starting with Ivan

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>cara is THIS obsessed

>>77628736
do the good ending after u kill king allant, u get 60k souls or soulsucker and u have saved boletaria

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>>77628784
who cares

>Talks about others having an unhealthy obsession with him
>As he flaunts his own unhealthy obsession with a C list celebrity that looks like a teen boy in drag

>>77628784

Im waiting for it to get updated again so I dont have to play everything at like 17-20 FPS

>>77628790
never reply to me again fuckin pencil

Stop taking obvious bait you nerdniggerfaggots.

>flaggots

Hahaha I love this shit

anyone else here invest 100's of dollars into fleshlights or is it just me

>>77628843

kyself fucking idiot

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There is only 1 white male in your picture ! I am literally shaking

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just got a filtered reply

might go to bed

>>77628924
Gonna take some sleeping pills and do just that

might go to my bathroom and scratch my ass

Speaking of sleeping pills, how do I into ambien

https://www.youtube.com/user/UCLAPhoneticsLab

pretty cool channel

>>77628961
Fuck off shill

>>77628942
Might scratch my exposed butthole an not wash my hands.

>>77628961
this poster studies wires he would say that

>>77628982
huh

>>77628982
wait no that isn't you

the only wiring I ever did was in a high school mechatronics class

*kills you*

>>77628997
i dont even go to school

*resurrects you with the edo tensei kinjutsu*

>>77629017
wire liar

*finishes the ressurection with gedō rinne tensei no jutsu*

killed a faggy centipede

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOVjfX7nWIg

>>77629082
Centipedes are gross
Don't think I've ever even seen one in person
I do remember taking a bite out of a pink worm as a kid because it looked like candy so I figured it must taste like candy too
I promptly spat it out in disgust

>>77629082
Why did I laugh at this?

>>77629096
Because you have brain problems and need to be psychiatrically evaluated before you cause harm to another human being or even yourself

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WEEEPOOOPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

When you guys say "Chad" do you mean niggers?

>>77630090
yes

>>77630112
How is mexico like? Is it kinda like Spain?

>>77630265
kek Finn memes are best memes

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rate me

*wakes up right next to you*

rip cum

>>77630457
*rips out your guts*

>>77630389
>dark hair
>glasses
>too pale
>gangly
>posters on the wall
0/10

>>77628502
>male employees
>diverse everyone is equal

>female employees
>all of them are white woman

Makes me go hmmmmmm...

Nice guy.

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what the fuck is wrong with canadians

>>77630645
Hi den mark

>>77630688
Don't place me in with that cuck, he's probably a poo

>>77630696
Hello can ada
How are ya qt?

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqjeNSNuNPM

>>77630748
haven't slept

How should I go about finding myself an American internet friend?

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>tfw i can't look at this without thinking about a british youtuber that make repetitive talking points about ess jay double yews

>>77631025
I like Sargon, he goes after low hanging fruit a lot and he's a liberal but his livestreams can be funny

>>77628502
Probably their parent's are wealthy and have good relations with important people

>>77630865
U have to take your beauty sleep
How are you supposed to be cute for tomorrow?

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>>77628502
>A Profile of The Eternal Business Student (AKA The Young Professional)
>tfw I made the mistake taking a business degree and will never get a job because the Eternal Business Student looks better and is more confident than me

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>>77630498
>too pale
I agree. He should get some sun on his body, like I have. How do you like my tan?

>>77630688
He's probably from Toronto.
Don't mistake Canadians with Torontonians. I have lived extensively in and out of the city, and can tell you that they are two different things.
I've never met a successful Torontonian born in the last 40 years who wasn't an immigrant. There is just something about Toronto that breeds failure.
Probably the only city in the world where the whites are the dumbest race.

>>77628712
thug 1 is the best tony hawks game

>>77631195
But at least you'll always know how they fucked up when they fuck up
t. data entry officer with a industrial relations degree

Ever...sucked a dick?

>>77631942
IDK sounds gay

>>77631942
I'm straight. Not yet, but I'm not saying I won't. I've seen a number of suckable dicks in porns (no homo).

>>77632037
There is nothing gay about sex with men if you're confident about your heterosexuality

>>77628524
Stop visiting 4chan.

>>77628625
And she's kinda weird lookin'

>>77628689
We don't imagine anything about you.

>>77632555
You're (you are) face is weird

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dead

>>77635710
i love you

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Morning /cum/

I miss America

>>77635846
We're still here I promise

>posting overwatch whores
sorry sir reddit is over there

You better call me sir

mister

jet fuels

Switched my major to accounting lads

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>>77635804
Good morning anon!

What's /cum/ doing today?

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>>77630389
Youlookexactly like the guy in he "virgin walk", "virgin piss" etc. Pics

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>switched my major to accounting
>lads

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>>77636515
Same thing we do every day anime poster, absolutely nothing

>>77636557
What's wrong bud? Why so sad?

>>77636515
I am going to bed work in 7 hours good night anime

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>visit america
>give homeless man a dollar
>he dabs

>>77636515
Probably being an unproductive semi-NEET waiting for job offers that probably aren't coming.

>>77636680

notice me

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Fatasses who moan and grunt in public restrooms while taking a shit are the absolute worst fucking filth on the planet.

Just shut your fucking mouth.
No one needs to be so fucking loud when taking a shit.

Goddamn I really wish we still had natural predators around to deal with needless loud fat cunts.

>>77636933
Just laugh and make them feel uncomfortable my dude

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Got banned from /sp/ for posting this

/sp/ has to have the absolute worst jannys on 4chan

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im back from work you guys

>>77636933
haha beta, I have to grunt while I shit because I'm a stallion of a man who fires shit out of my ass as hard and fast as I can to make as much noise as possible

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>accidentally swipe right on an army whore

I don't even make threads anymore for fear of getting banned

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/cum/?

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/cuuuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUM/!!!!!

show us your butt you slutty danegirl

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AAAAAAHHHHHHH

my favourite word is endeavour

whats yours

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>>77637814

>>77637880
endeavor

>>77637985
are you literally me

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This is me. Literally me. No other character can come close to relating to me like this. There is no way you can convince me this is not me. This character could not possibly be anymore me. It's me, and nobody can convince me otherwise. If anyone approached me on the topic of this not possibly being me, then I immediately shut them down with overwhelming evidence that this character is me. This character is me, it is indisputable. Why anyone would try to argue that this character is not me is beyond me. If you held two pictures of me and this character side by side, you'd see no difference. I can safely look at this character every day and say "Yup, that's me". I can practically see this character every time I look at myself in the mirror. I go outside and people stop me to comment how similar I look and act to this character. I chuckle softly as I'm assured everyday this character is me in every way. I can smile each time I get out of bed every morning knowing that I've found my identity with this character and I know my place in this world. It's really quite funny how similar this character is to me, it's almost like we're identical twins. When I first saw this character, I had an existential crisis. What if this character was the real me and I was the fictional being. What if this character actual became aware of my existence? Did this character have the ability to become self aware itself?

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Love it when the dane gets no attention

must be like a puppy trying to catch a bird

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>/pol/'s /dixie/ is full of children complaining about the north because "muh libruls"
>/int/'s /dixie/ is one turk, a brit and a midwesterner
Why can't the south act normally?

*grabs your attention*

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>>77638659
weird

Just got done with a presentation

As always, I'm the one who does the most

bit bored desu lads

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beat the record average on drive thru and got to leave work early today

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ol3XhEQgLI

>>77639066
>king turd of shit mountain

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>>77639127
my shitty wageslave accomplishment is more than anything you've ever achieved nerd

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>Youtube once again found a way to circumvent my Flash forcing plugin
>it's the only Flash forcing pluging left for my browser version
>the HTML5 player is complete garbage and exclusively offers 360p
>refuse to update my browser in case something about it will change or the hardware usage will go up for absolutely no fucking reason while offering exactly the same functionality as before

>>77639160
No, it's not. I'm at work, and I'm doing things you don't know how to do. I'm long past my fast food days.

>>77639160
>>77639196
stop fighting

Thinking about buying an anime shirt

Jet fuel can't melt steel beams.

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YAY! I get to be brother hood of steel soon!

Before I do, do any of the other factions have power armor that they will give you?

Jass the Gews

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>>77640199
Are you playing New Vegas?

>>77640262
no 4

i remember in vegas the bad guys had power armor too buy you couldn't join them.

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>>77640356
You can join the "bad guys" in New Vegas

Really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really hate islam

>>77640600
Me too, lad.

>>77640917
It's even worse because the version that's going to take over the world is Saudi Arabias version. In that version we will all die. Islam if not stopped will kill all of us

>>77640989
Yes mohammed's teaching from when he went to medina, they are cancerous. It's sad that these are more popular these days. I guess that's what happens when they don't live in peaceful societies, they turn to the aggressive teachings of their religion? I don't know. But I hate it either way.

I have bubble tea

>>77630389
would fug

*vapes*

does anyone remember how pissed off people were when they found out that the brotherhood wasn't nice in New Vegas

*rapes*

What is up, my niggers?

you can't spell rape without ape

>>77641650
>Iceland

Watch your fucking mouth whitey.

t. ape

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>>77641650
<3

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>>77640356
>you couldn't join them
i dont think there was a single faction you absolutely couldnt join in new vegas

>>77628502
t. coping STEMcuck

>>77641691
Have you ever seen a REAL white person?

>>77630090
Chad is basically the handsome, popular, charismatic guy. Top dog, alpha male, star quarterback, etc

>>77641757
Omertas maybe

You couldn't join the Fiends and the Vipers iirc

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>>77641650
hey cutie

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How will he ever recover

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i was looking if you can join the institute. even though that wouldn't make sense.

... is my fucking son the leader of the institute. fucking terrible writing, that makes no sense.

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I work as a general contractor. There's so much fucking money to make in the trades if you're willing to rip people off.

I'm white, but I employ east Indians in the greater Toronto area. We build homes for a living. You're required to put studs every 16 inches off centre. But what we do is install it properly and get it inspected and passed then tear out 50% of the studs and put the drywall up over top of it.


We do all of the rebar as well for the foundations too. We get that inspected and passed then remove 60%-70% of it and pour the concrete over it they never know. Their foundations end up cracking one year later but we're long gone by then and have changed our company name so they can't sue us.

We pretty much repeat all of this with everything in the building. Insulation is my favourite. Sometimes when we build houses in the summer we remove 100% of the insulation and move it to the next house. They will buy the house during the heat of summer and not notice they're cold as fuck until winter.

As long as it passes inspection and I have my paper work it isn't my fault heh. I just change my companies name every 8 months and no one can do anything.

You ever see Mike homes on homes episodes about their old falling apart houses? Alot of that handy work was mine in the Ontario region.

I feel so happy taking advantage of rich idiots willing to spend 2 million dollars on cuck sheds.

>>77641729
What kind of tape?

>>77641991
maybe we shouldn't allow people who regularly attempt suicide in the military

>>77642030
Bigot

>>77641991
I love Trump again.

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>>77641957
Do those count as factions?

>>77641961
i love my adorable girlfriend kuroneko

Friends, what do I get for lunch?
Chickfila
Five Guys
Other

Please vote now.

>>77642071
I think the Omertas do

The Fiends and Vipers aren't factions in game but they're still a groups that you can't join

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>>77642103
give guys desu
I really miss it down here

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>>77641650
I am watching anime

>>77642103
Chickfila

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Way way up I feel blessed, way up I feel blessed
Straight up

>>77642103
get five guys buddy

>>77642301
>>77642133
Don't listen to these two

>>77642103
Chickfila

>>77642103
salad

>2 five guys
>2 chickfilas

Thanks. I can always count on you guys to be completely useless.

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Let's all embrace in a group hug, guys.

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Going to watch Tatami Galaxy with a pretty cute girl later today.
Life is good.

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*GROUUUUUP HUUUUUUUUUUUUG*

deeespaaacito

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Was it rape?

>>77642915
Isn't everything?

wew now i have power armor and nuclear physiscist.

high intelligence was a good choice.

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>>77643166
>playing fallout 4

was reverse engineering designed to make people want to kill themselves, doing some crackmes and they're mindfucking me

>>77642020
i always knew buying a house was a bad idea.

>>77643217
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgM9JRXQbOA

Gonna go to the county fair buds

>>77643217
no you're just a retarded brainlet

>>77643386
Get some deep fried oreos for me.

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>>77643501
>tfw i had to eat fair food for a whole week

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Are nazis "in" now?

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>walking to work
>raining
>ask qt walking the same way if she wants to share my umbrella
>"no"
>walks slightly ahead of me for 10 minutes getting soaked in the rain

>>77643646
Sort of. I've noticed a significant uptick in high test, confident right wingers recently that are nothing like the Romney worshipers. I'm guessing these people didn't care about politics 5+ years ago.

>>77643646
yes

>>77643717
Shit, been there. I feel for you.

i am a chef boyardee connoisseur, in all sincerity and likelihood

>>77643646
they were always in

>>77643605
Please show me your belly.

>>77643833
shot me your thighs first

>shot me in the thigh

dont touch my koolaid

>>77643646
>>77643646
Wtf I'm a nazi now

*touches your chocolate milk instead*

the dont call me the wigglewouser for no good reason

lol it's ok only 9mm

sharted

Anyways given today's edition, going to ask if any of you boys have CFA?

>>77643984
Fuck off Euro

>>77643984
passed level 2 last year

>>77643894
I can show you my leg.

>>77643984
I am a level 58 orc

nerds

>>77644000
Thinking about getting my level one, either the July that comes around soonest, or in two years, all down to what workload I can stomach. More likely in two years though. I'd rather it be something I devote my weekends to, so I don't slack on the week. And of course following it up till level 3, but only if I discover it's something that suits me.

Anyways, if you don't mind me asking, where are you now?
Also how many hours did you study yours?

>>77643997
Chill I'll be american in no time if I can get into IB ":3".

>>77644000
And since I forgot, grats mate! You're better than 60% of everyone else apparently.

>build up a tolerance to bullets by repeatedly shooting yourself over and over again but in small doses

>>77644194
It's amazing we haven't come up with a bullet vaccine yet.

>>77644194
Just use 9mm

You can't be dumped and get your heart broken if you never date anyone.

*black man pointing to forehead*

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>>77644130
>>77644180
>TFW i was just joking and I'm actually a NEET who barely graduated highschool

all this politics shit, historical revisionism and anti-white bullshit is making me depressed

>>77644279
>he managed to graduate
normalfag

Popular opinion:
The settlement system is what ruined Fallout 4
The Power Armor in Fallout 4 was dogshit

>>77644338
You're on your way. This is just the first step.

>>77644279
>barley graduated highschool
Lol retard

>>77644279
You can always apply to college, tho.

>>77644279
Mmh, well at least you know how it goes, with the three levels and what not, so you get to scurry with me calling you "cultured" I guess.

I'd totally try to get a CFA if I was full-blown NEET though. It's only about 400 hours worth of préparation, so nothing that would strain a NEET.

And it's not like I even have good motives for getting one. I've only heard people mention it in my animes so I'd like one now.

Haven't showered in a few days and my balls have finally reached that prime musk.

>>77644414
Take a shower, pal.

>want to go to Dairy Queen
>it's the buy one and we'll donate money to charity gimmick day
>don't want to go anymore because it'll be too full

Am I a bad person?

>>77644402
I'm pretty sure you need professional experience and a bachelors degree to even go for it.

I looked up my doctor on linkedin and he has a CFA level 1 lol btw

>>77644414
What do the people at work say?

>>77644467
Nothing to my face.

I am an fashion expert every body I know comes to me for fashion advice

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>>77644458
Yah, one of the two I guess. The guy's there are pretty much utter cunts, and ensure by every mean it stays their own private club. Hell, having the CFA isn't even enough to them, and you have to be suscribed as a member.

And lmao people don't usually brag about a level one. Hell, people I know who have it up to level three usually say it's even an unspoken rule that you're not allowed to call yourself "[your name], CFA" on LinkedIn until five years of having earned it.

morning /cum/dumpsters

fashion is for gays and ugly people

H-Huh? You say you've never seen a vagina before? And how old are you? Pfffffffft, Anon, time to fix that! Close your eyes for a second, aaaaaand ;

H-HERE!

HAHAHAAAHAAH
J-Jeez, Anon, You should've seen the look on Your face! It's just m-muscles with a hole in it, Anon. Does it really excite You THAT much? Of course it does, what a stupid question, that r-raging erection in your pants answers everything. Might aswell let you lick it, heck! P-Put Your whole tongue in there! Just be gentle, Anon. Heck, even touch my boobs, squirt them,do what you want with them, Anon. Jeezus fucking Christ i'm so wet. I'm like a fucking sieve. Would You mind if you plugged your penis in t-there? I-I'm sorry if this is too much for you, after all, this is the first time You've seen a vagina in your life! Besides when you got out of your mother's. After this can you put your cock in my mouth? I want to lick every single d-drop cum remaining. Give me your pleasure, Anon. I want every drip of your cum inside my mouth! I want to have your babies, Anon. Heck i can even give You anal, everything for my lovely Anon~ Just don't let anyone see Us or We're both in trouble~

So now that we finished THAT, what do You plan on doing to me Anon, I'm all yours, just don't forget to be gentle. For some odd reason my tits are hard, would You like to suck on them, Anon?~
I really didn't know how perverted I was, Anon. It feels w-wonderful to be penetrated by such a r-rockhard cock, I wish We c-could do this forever, I really feel like there's something b-b-b-between us, I'll do anything for my beautiful Anon. I'll serve his cock for the rest of his life, I always wanted your cock, Anon, I was stalking you, Waiting until this day, when You penetrated my vagina, It feels so good, I can't stop, I require more cum, Will You please my desires, A-Anon?~

Official denonym for /cum/ posters is /cum/socks.

>>77644672
>And lmao people don't usually brag about a level one.

Oh I know I just meant it's weird that a medical doctor would have a CFA lvl 1 for some reason.

Kind of considering going to university senpai, not sure if it's too late and I'm too brainlet to actually make it anywhere though.

shan't be reading that post

>>77644716
Like my Singaporean cartoons?

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denmark that was an awful fucking post

>>77644716
wtf i love danes now?

>>77628524

The trick is to properly utilize chloroform, duct tape and Stockholm's syndrome.

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>no computer for 3 weeks
What THE fuck do I do while I'm waiting?

>>77644901
Read
Talk to girls

I can hardly stand a half of a day without net my dude

good luck

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>talk to girls

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>>77644915
I need real answers

>>77644777
>Kind of considering going to university senpai, not sure if it's too late and I'm too brainlet to actually make it anywhere though.
You seem heck a smart enough to me! Never too late really, I mean except that I've been told that when you enroll later than the average, and are hoping to end somewhere prestigious, you'll have to follow-up your Bachelors and Masters continuously, whereas other people would leave themselves a bit of a break in-between to garner some experience for themselves that would mend their shitty GPA. *But*, be serious about things, get a great GPA all throughout (whatever GPA means), and you'll be golden.

Well if I'm making sense. But good luck! Just withdraw yourself from 4chan a bit.
Love being here but heck does my productivity shoot up when I can afford not to be here.

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>talk to girls

>>77644963
steal a neighbors internet

>>77644975
girls like talking about salad dressing etc.

tfw beer gut
tfw fulfilling your country's stereotypes

>>77644992
I have my own internet

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>talk to girls

that's a good idea

>>77645047
steal your neighbors computer

>>77645047
Does your neighbour have a computer and an unsafe door-lock?

>>77645047

buy a second computer

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>>77644973
>You seem heck a smart enough to me!
Thank you france... you are a very nice man

>Well if I'm making sense. But good luck! Just withdraw yourself from 4chan a bit.
>Love being here but heck does my productivity shoot up when I can afford not to be here.
You're right. I really should take a break. It feels like I just hope on for "30 minutes" and then look at the time and half the day is gone.

>>77628611
>girl's lip on top
are you an effeminate faggot. Assert dominance.

>>77645090
Do you mean buy or buy(shoplifting)?

>>77645113
It's amazing the dumb esoteric things that you all notice and talk about.

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>>77645113
tfw i didn't even know guys lips we'e supposed to be on top of the girls

>>77645090
That's what I'm going to do. Just waiting for PayPal to give me my money.
>>77645074
No
>>77645089
No one Lock's Thier doors here. I'm not going to steal Thier things

>60 minutes in an hour
>60 seconds in a minute
>1000 milliseconds in a seconds
I just realized this while using webm for retards. who thought that would be a good idea?

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>went to bed early the other day
>somebody rang my door bell but I was too tired to get up
>neighbor says that somebody who looked like me rang my doorbell
>tfw

Called my friend to ask if it was him but he never responded

>tfw so many shoes and socks in the world youll never try on all shoeshocks combos ITW

>>77645212
I did

>>77645265
>>77645265
>>77645265
>>77645265
>>77645265
>>77645265

>>77645277
>13 posts early

Early shitter

>>77644992
I've done this before to watch hentai.

I never watch internet on my own internet.

>>77645304
*hentai on my own internet
dumb

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>>77645304
>>77645347

>tfw you'll never be this strong

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93IxqzQHn1I

>>77645112
Not really but good mood I guess?

>It feels like I just hope on for "30 minutes"
Scarily familiar. I hate that I'm doing this to myself but I work out my day with a time-table now, and I don't leave myself more than 30 minutes/1 hour of this dump, and then have to be out or I'll make a mess of the rest of the timetable, and thankfully I'm tidy enough that I don't really like the thought of that and leave on my own.
We've just to put up limits for ourselves. It sucks, but these 3-7 years depending on how much you'll study are going to be career-defining so I'd hate to have regrets about being here too much.

shant

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>>77645437
>when i think about the amount of time I've wasted on 4chan or videogames

I could be a fucking genius right now. Could definitely have everything in the world.

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Don't make me nuke >>77645368

*opens /cum/*
*sees posts*
*closes /cum/*

*opens cum
*gets dubs
*closes cum

Reroll