/brit/ - The God Wills It Edition

Post willy:height ratio lads

>>75302860
1:1

Anime

>>75302860
how about you foy

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>walk into tesco for some fags
>see this

what do?

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I tried to sleep alone, but I couldn't do it
You could be sitting next to me, I wouldn't know it

>>75302989
act like a nigger

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I bet /brit/ is the first place MI5 come to when a terrorist attack occurs

>Oh fuck another terrorist attack, let's check to see if it's pakipoo

>>75303027
i bet it isnt

what should i have for tea?

>not bad looking or super autistic
>good job, social life etc
>know I could get a GF if i tried
>scared of getting performance anxiety when the time comes

how do I get over this lads? I just KNOW that I'm not gonna be able to get it up

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anime

hate muzzies. send the tanks in

>>75303053
'za

pepperoni pineapple

>>75303032
yes

>>75303027
she's too dumb to make a bomb and too antisocial to acquire one

>>75303032
sowhr

>>75303027
It'll be Ummah.com

>>75303027
made a post insinuating pakipoo was the manchester bomber a few threads ago and only one lad Bradley posted in response

Ballbag is currently hotter than the surface of the sun

>>75303068
>she

YAAAAS

>>75303053
**flops willy on table**

this

>>75303055
go to the doctor and get pills, either calming ones or erection ones

How easy is it to fake autism in order to get neetbucks?

can I interest you in a water filter

CHOKING

Dying for a cold drink. Been out in this heat, in a jacket, for 3 hours walking and of course forgot to bring more.

DYING

>>75303108
wew
would give this a go if I knew there was someone standing by with a tranq gun

>>75303108
need to be sacrificed to the bearcube

bet rorkes would love immigration if it was Coptic Christians

didsbury mosque

>>75303055
Take phenibut prior to the occasion

>>75303108
me in the cage

>>75303138
tranq guns take a while to work on something that size

>>75303136

Why havent you took the jacket off?

>>75303108
me in the box

>>75303065
hmmm good shout tbf
>>75303100
*chops willy up and puts it on 'za*
heh... thanks for the pepperoni... ..

mental how many people in first world countries think suicide is illegal

"naan bread" = bread bread
"chai tea" = tea tea
"chutney sauce" = sauce sauce
"sharia law" = law law

>>75303147
People just don't want Muslims/Pakis/Africans

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>>75303055
>mfw couldn't get it up on my 18th bday with my gf at the time because I was too nervous and drunk
>had another chance but was too scared the same thing would happen again
>now 24 year old virgin and worried my willy won't work when the time comes

All I can say is try to relax and don't drink beforehand, also don't want for a few days before.

>>75303170
a bloody big one then

>>75303136
the fuck are you doing wearing a jacket today lad? it's shorts and t-shirt weather.

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>>75303108
>the bear will never break the glass
>he will never serve malthusian justice to these runts

I'm a really big fan of the Chinese idea that the soul is something that needs to be cultivated rather than something innate to everyone.
the seed may be innate, but often the seed is never allowed to grow and bloom.

the folk religion here is very interesting and you can definitely see the parallels with European pagan ideas. I know in the Icelandic Edda they echo a similar idea that the soul needs to be grown and strengthened rather than something given by God for nothing.

>>75302811
>>75302872

>>75303206
how dare you

>>75303192
sahara desert = desert desert
gili island = island island

>>75303177
>>75303220
The zip is stuck and I can't take it off

>>75302989
assume it's part of some deano's shit youtube prank

>>75303236
if he was using fit in the health way then he was right

>>75303192
don't care about foreign languages

english is literally the one world language at this point

if you don't speak it you're guaranteed to be wither poor or retarded or both

>>75303192
>>75303241
mount fuji = mount mountain

>>75303142
would sacrifice every leaf to the bearcube hehe

>>75303108
Me trying to get the girl in the cube

5 o'clock needs to get a chicken on

>>75303249
LOL

>>75303237
And gypsies

..doing a poo.. haha doing a wank lads.. hahaha doing a post

..haha me on the left lads, haha me on the right... ahaahaha me in the radical centre

ey la FOY, la FONT, ahahahaha.. ey la 'sheed, 'orke la

HOWLING ahahaha

could heem anyone in this thread la ahahah


brit in one post

>>75303236
niggity nogs are quite ugly tbf

Business idea: Assyrian christians

if i wanted this much heat i'd have stayed in bangladesh

>>75303291
nonce

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>don't care about foreign languages
>english is literally the one world language at this point
>if you don't speak it you're guaranteed to be wither poor or retarded or both

>>75303177
>>75303220
Autistic about my arms

>>75303273
thanks for helping that catch on

>>75303192
>>75303241
Torpenhow Hill = hill hill hill hill

>>75303249

Whats stoppping you from taking it off overhead like a jumper? Stupidity?

>>75303291
great post desu

at least gak doesn't ruin my bowels

>>75303192
>>75303321
anime nonce = paedophile paedophile

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>>75303321
Bryn = hill (in welsh)

>tfw can't wear short-sleeved shirts out because my arms are STILL covered in embarrassing gimpy scars from years ago
fucks sake

>>75303136
I've been saved lads. Some absolute HEROES are giving out free tins of coke in the city centre.

Live to post another day. Thanks be to God.

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How do I achieve a shag of a slag?

need a (white)german-speaking gf

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>he thinks christianity will save EVROPA
stop

>>75303326
it's zipped to the collar
i tried doing it but i ended stuck and looking like nun

PLUS
NO
BODY
I
KNOW
GOT
KILLED
IN
SOUTH
CENTRAL
LA

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Sorry Nazis, race doesn't even exist

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnfKgffCZ7U

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>>75303354

Here, this is what you wanted right?

>>75303362
haha, you have something in common with pakipoo

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>>75303362
bio oil la
but seriously i doubt anyone would notice/care. My mate had some pretty big scars around his forearm and i genuinely didnt notice till he pointed them out

>>75303377
*winks at you*

>>75303397
dont even need to watch to know its wrong

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>>75303291
>..doing a poo.. haha doing a wank lads.. hahaha doing a post

>..haha me on the left lads, haha me on the right... ahaahaha me in the radical centre

>ey la FOY, la FONT, ahahahaha.. ey la 'sheed, 'orke la

>HOWLING ahahaha

>could heem anyone in this thread la ahahah

>brit in one post

>>75303409
that gut is seriously weird compared to the rest of him

Bit warm x

back from my walk was about 2 and a half hours

tim's body reminds me of my own

haha

>>75303108
Ah yes, the radical centre

Feel fucking awful but don't know why

>>75303377
idk if paganism can be successfully rehabilitated
and just directly importing eastern ideas without context is no good either

like it or not, Christianity is like the old man working in the civil service who refuses to die and therefore allow someone else to move up

*does a funky jig*

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>don't want for a few days before.

Not a fan of this gimmick where some lad pretends to be me and acts like I'm too stupid to take off a jacket instead of being too autistic and body conscious to take it off

>>75303403
delete this
>>75303409
they're pretty noticeable
think it's just the paranoia that somebody I know will ask how I got them and I won't have an answer

>>75303441
think its something in his diet making him bloated. Probably a lot of gluten or something. Bet he takes rancid shits

>>75303510
excellent post

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>>75303510

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if you think about it shouldn't "awful" and "awesome" mean the same thing?
same with "terrific" and "horrific"

I'm starting to think I may actually vote labour after all. Seems to be saying the right things at least 50% of the time, whereas May is just digging herself further away.

>wake up at 9
>bedroom feels like a fucking sauna
>check temp
>15°C
>check later 26°C
this infernal heat is fucking everything lads

need it out of business asap

>>75303557
>Facebook-0fc620.png
FONT

need a white, namibian, german/afrikaans/english spreaking gf

>>75303557
hate these comics

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me and al gf

>>75303559
awful DID mean awesome

the virgin walk meme elicits great mirth in me due to its accuracy, saw several virgins when out on campus today; ugly runts, walking disgustingly awkwardly like in the picture, and hilariously wearing dark grey/black hoodies in 25-26c temperatures

wretched creatures, but very amusing all the same

>>75303559
awe used to mean something else in the past

>>75303559
awesome is supposed to refer to the scale of something. e.g. the project was awesome in scale
yanks just used it wrongly until it stuck

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>hate these comics

>walk through Belfast
>white faces as far as the eye can see
>Start to get near Queens University
>Gays dukes niggers pakis and gooks EVERYWHERE
Abolish universities NOW

>>75303530
>think it's just the paranoia that somebody I know will ask how I got them and I won't have an answer
well unless you hang around autistic literal children 100% of people will infer that it's from self harm and won't ask. And if they do, tbf the only thing you can do is tell them the truth. People don't react badly to stuff like that, you're letting your own embarassment decide how you think they'd respond

>>75303567
>tories haven't even bombed anything back yet
that was the moment they lost my vote desu

too scared of alienating voters to avenge britain

>>75303607
projecting much

>>75303557
he wasn't making an argument in the first place you melt

>>75303652
>dukes
FOB

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>>75303559
>if you think about it

no thanks

just cycled from bristol to bath and back. pretty knackered but was a lovely ride.

>>75303607
Always chuckle at runts wearing hoodies and jackets in the heat, everyone knows you are hiding your body

>>75303712
did you take the old rail trail?

If i was janny i would delete all rorke posts

>>75303664
tbf what could they bomb? he wasnt sent here by anyone, and if he does have a network of terrorist friends it's based in this country

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>>75303397
if theres no such thing as race then there cant be such a thing as racism.

>>75303712
>anyone from bristol
>going for a bath
doubt that very much you dirty wog

>>75303584
>mfw go to the sauna regularly and now this heat feels alri

It's the humidity that's shit, my back is so sweaty but if you just ignore it it's not too bad.

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>>75303702


>he wasn't making an argument in the first place you melt

>>75303652
remember when i was about 15 and I was watching some louis theroux documentary on pornstars
there was this blonde bird who was saying she got into porn after learning about the industry in her womens studies class
that was the first time I questioned whats being taught in universities

>>75303607
virgin observing other virgins as a way to re-affirm their own awkward attempts at camouflage

Sunburned lads

>>75303652
glad desu

you cunts have gone on about "muh whitest part of the uk" for too long, now that the bombs have died down it's time to lube up and get ready for the enrichment just like uncle gerry wants

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>Alex Antetokounmpo is 6'5 at 15 years old. He has a 7'2 wingspan.
how can whites even compete

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>remember when i was about 15 and I was watching some louis theroux documentary on pornstars
>there was this blonde bird who was saying she got into porn after learning about the industry in her womens studies class
>that was the first time I questioned whats being taught in universities

>>75303745
isis training camps or key positions/supplies

and before you say "well they keep that secret" nah we know where some are, and if some lad from mannie can find it we can send undercover agents and find out more

>tfw sunbathing in my garden shirtless and all the milfs hanging out their washing keep peeking through the gaps in the fences

>being unironically racist

wew

>>75303797
im not gay

>>75303805
lmao imagine two footing him

his shins would snap like a twig

>>75303801
dont think gerry cares about diversity much he just wants a united ireland and his party has to appeal to young people to get into power

Near 4 hours in this searing heat lads. Another half hour walk to get home. Haven't eaten since 11. No water either. And no money. Had a shit load of blood taken about an hour ago too. Genuinely unsure if I'll make it home.

different legal arrangements can work well like yank gun laws it's just the transition that would be awkward

>>75303805
does anyone not find it weird how if you're tall and black you're 100% playing basketball?
like these kids get no real choice in the matter or are so conditioned they can see nothing else for themselves.

Found a Muslim in prague

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@50.0910401,14.4165385,3a,16.2y,350.64h,85.32t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1sAVPlctNLuT9lsDhlw82TbA!2e0!7i13312!8i6656

>>75303737
yeh

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>>tfw sunbathing in my garden shirtless and all the milfs hanging out their washing keep peeking through the gaps in the fences

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>>tfw sunbathing in my garden shirtless and all the milfs hanging out their washing keep peeking through the gaps in the fences

>>75303882
they could play football too

Haven't spoken to anyone all day feeling incredibly lonely and depressed don't know what to do

>>75303887
wtf I hate czechia now

Mad that people think the conservatives are right wing.

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>>75303871
then let the challenge......begin.......

Seen a little skinnyfat runt out in his garden sunbathing
Sent a snap if him to the girls and we all are taking the piss out of him
Shelly said he looks like a string cheese out his wrapper lol xxox

>>75303851
imagine FINALLY seeing Ireland united and independent only to have it flooded with Nigerians and other assorted wogs immediately, then told you're culture is evil and oppressive.

>>75303851
This. Sinn Fein posters in Ardoyne and the Old Park and all that say nothing about gays, for example. But these ones outside the gay bar and QUB have big "MARRIAGE EQUALITY NOW'" posters above the Vote SF posters.

>>75303397
read the article and 10/11 things are non-arguments and obviously population genetics can measure what cline you come from http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/gnxp/2012/03/where-the-wild-clines-arent/#.WShITmjDFEZ

>>75303927
>string cheese
CHEESE
STRING

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>>75303908
>>75303909

>>75303595
>ruining your entire fit with retarded blue shoe laces

astaghfirullah don't trigger me

>>75303882
if you're that freakishly big its usually the only sport you can excel at
manlets will wreck you at football and you're too tall gain muscle to compete in rugby/gridiron

>>75303927
this would genuinely happen in yankland

>>75303908
>>75303909

>>75303924
the hooded demon guys used to scare the fuck out of me, had nightmares about them sometimes

>spent all winter in a t-shirt bragging about how it wasn't cold
>literally dying now it's got a lickle hot
i am the definition of melt

fucker on my train letting his kids run wild
climbing all over the seats and running up and down the isle

hello pls post slags

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>finish work at 9:30
>get home about 10
>have to be at work tomorrow by 7:30

>>75304124
fucker on my train
letting his kids run wild
climbing all over the seats and
running up and down the isle

*snaps*

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>>75304141

>>75304153
>another british nonce moved out to SEasia to avoid the authorities and continue his noncing unabated

let me guess, you work in IT too

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>>75304124

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>>75304153
>mfw my life isn't that shit

What happened to /fug/ lads?

>>75304178
not a bad gimmick idea

for a yank

>>75304198
the plus side is I didn't work all day today until the night, and tomorrow I have all day off after the morning

just a shit schedule

*shuffles in quietly*
heh a wagie among neets
*reports back to mr noseberg*

>>75304194
hes an english teacher
non regulars need to FUCK off

>>75304220
no interest whatsoever

>tfw white anglosaxon master race
>tfw need to grease myself up with factor 50 like i'm chasing a dog through an air conditioning unit before i can set foot outside
ah yes the price we pay for being the superior race

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Where is my facking knighthood, you ungrateful twats? reeeeeeeeeeeeeee

>>75304247
Reports what?

>>75303924
bloody loved that program

>>75304343
looks like he's holding in a vom

>>75304194
was singing this while riding around town this morning
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8VZS61fAYM

>>75304200
austic germans from /deutsch/ started spamming gott strafe england, people stopped coming and it died

now autistic finns, estonians and hungarians took the name for their own pointless general

>>75303924
>never saw anyone complete the way of the warrior but it looked well easy

probably wasnt haha

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R8 my new toilet brits

>>75304343
Why does he have the body of a child?

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You all need to vote in Corbyn before mummy may shuts down radical websites like the 'chon

>>75304392
good lad

>>75304440
can love bloom on the internet battlefield?

>>75304440
DISCIPLINE ME MUMMY
ONE SPANK FOR EVERY NAUGHT GOOGLE SEARCH MUMMY

>>75304392
state of that back wall

>>75304392
t-thanks
I never realised how much people like union flag iconography around the world
it's a bit odd

>>75304343
maybe he should have won a world cup or at least a euro

>>75304511
it's a sweet design

business idea: corbs wins the election, but a month after he wins some random mp dies, blair runs to replace them in a byelection, winning, then challenges corbyn for labour leadership and wins, bringing forth the radical centrist revolution (again)

>>75304318
>he thinks anglos are superior
>he doesn't realise that Gaels have always been the true ubermensch on these islands

>>75304220
haha I totally don't type like that

>>75304558
shut the fuck up already, you gormless twat
our politics are not some yank soap opera with your favourite characters having relationships
cannot fucking stand you lot and your inane fucking posts PISS OFF

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>>75304558
Blair is toxic now lad
would have to be someone else like Ed Balls

>>75304592
alri jezza

>>75304561
hmmm yes hmmm as a fellow gael i agree we are truly superior
*starves to death on an island surrounded by fish*

it's funny to go from listening to jordan peterson to listening to varg vikernes because the gap in intelligence between the two is so staggeringly large

Ed Balls

>>75304592
finally someone said it

>>75304634
why you'd bother listening to either is beyond me

Due to the bombing earlier in the week brexit has been cancelled until further notice

>>75304608
not a bad plan if you think about it


he has name recognition with normies, approval ratings will skyrocket

>>75304627
there was plenty of fish in markets lad
people couldn't afford it

hate those gormless twats who think that encryption should be banned because they don't understand it

Ed's balls

business idea: make british politics some yank soap opera

>>75304700
poor you
sorry you had to go through that x

>>75304650
i believe that it's important to listen to a wide variety of perspectives

>>75304723
The Only Way Is Westminster

>>75304723
VERY good plan

instead of coronation street, downing street

irish potato famine

Sorry love, YOU'RE SACKED

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-40057165

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>2015 game
>still has a non-sale price of 80usd
weird

>>75304780
lol

>>75304736
>>75304764
Made in Eton

>>75304700
Hahahahahahahaha How The Fuck Is The Great Famine Real Hahahaha Nigga Just Go Fishing Like Nigga Catch Some Fish Haha

>>75304789
she should get a job at rebel media

>>75304793
just pirate it
its not worth buying

>>75304736
>>75304801
lonely 40 year old woman on twitter-tier posts

>>75304821
ive no interest honestly i was just alerted to the sale and wonder how much it was after 67% off

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did someone say rebel media?

>>75304793
games are too expensive, literally no reason not to pirate offline games

"muh viruses", only mongs get viruses from pirating

>>75304843
nah, didn't mention wine

>>75304849
that man voice mcgoo?

>>75304793
maybe because they are gonna add vr capabilities

bet you're in here James you utter mong, have you reserved the table at the red lion yet ffs?

big fan of a hairy snatch

>>75304849
fuck this rorkess

Big game tomorrow lads

>>75304861
alternative reason: kat and extratorrent died and tpb is blocked now

going to the dog races tonight
someone give me a word that would likely be in a dog name and I'll stick a cheeky quid on 'em for you

Just got off the phone reserving my seats at the pub. Now just need to get my pint glass out of the cupboard and I'll be ready to go.

left wing? right wing?

they're both the same in the end

>>75304889
dumb vr nerds

>>75304916
>not able to worked around blocks
>not able to find replacement sites
mong

>>75304958

>he doesnt have his personal glass behind the bar already.

CREASING

>>75304916
1337x and qbittorrent's search lad

>not using Chinese/Russian torrent sites
never have issue finding things in English either, at worst there might be subtitles

>>75304958
dont forget to bring a coaster

>>75304946
bitch

>>75304946
santa's little helper

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>>75304980
this

>>75304964
don't understand girls' obsession with eyebrows i don't even notice them

>>75304991
I would but I also like to take it with me to house parties.

>>75304958
better not be that stein glass again Hans you greedy fuck, took half the pitcher to fill the bastard!

took my t shirt off in the park it was too farm
hope no one had unpure thoughts

>>75304946
Mr. Kitty Cat

>>75304524
He bottled it in every competition we played in.

Hope the cunt gets nothing

>brits are dying in the heat, but the runts on here are too scared to walk around in a tshirt, and so wear "the virgin hoody"

HOWLING

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>>75305036

>>75304946
little

>>75305022
wow he really does have a way with words doesnt he

>>75305014
>>75305018
>>75305043
gonna be a cheap night haha

>>75305069
worse is its because he cuts himself, the welp

>>75304985
rude
>>75304993
>1337x
thanks
>qbittorrent's search
sounds weird, don't think id be literate enough to vet the results

>>75305027
Once you notice them you'll never stop

Britain is on the verge of a race war,

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>Britain is on the verge of a race war,

asked a girl out

she said yes but only as friends

should i still go or should i tell her to fuck off?

I like to hurt myself

>>75305107
mm obviously not true, mam's even gone through the trouble to have a type of tattoing done and i still don't notice the difference

feel like its getting more heated than usual in the uk after manchester (pardon the pun)
fink something might pop off
dont want to discuss it, just wanted to point it out

alri?

>>75305146
go dressed as Chandler Bing and keep asking which one she's supposed to be

>>75305115
hope you're training lad

>>75304916
use rutracker

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Accidentally superliked instead of liked a girl on Tinder and we matched

Now she's gonna think I'm desperate

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It's roasting lads

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>>75305146
>asked a girl out

>she said yes but only as friends

>>75305200
'nce

>>75305190
>this dork can get a gf and you nerds can't get a hug
Sad!

do not touch willie

>>75305168
Enjoyed this post

>>75305004
>>75305187
but all the sections are labelled in russian :\

moving to yankland when the time comes to fight the race war lads

>>75305146
go, pretend to have a disorder and make her regret ever enabling you

something like going everywhere on all fours or continually screaming

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business idea: form a party based on an immigration policy of fit birds only

>>75305180
Everyday at the Mosque

>>75305235
Fuck off we're full

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>>75305237
something like this?

>>75305200
>forearm scars
dropped

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>>75305202

>>75305168
did a giggle

>>75305235
but thats the major battleground

>>75305168
Did a crease

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>>75305246
this

>>75303908
>>75303909
>1 second apart

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Will she fight in the race war?

>>75305269
Who told the scousers about technology?

>>75305269
monkaS

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>when you realize other people can smell your cum, but you can't so even if you've wanked at any point in the last 24 hours everyone around you can smell a strong semen smell

>>75305234
its hard at the start but after a while you understand everything without even knowing russian. its well indicated

>>75305234
get a browser extension to translate the page

Was the "prophet" Muhammad a cocksucking queer or did he only fuck goats and children?

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>>75305312

>>75305146
go but try to be an uncomfortable to her as possible
bring a fedora and try to kiss her hand or something

>>75305312
Its alpha to make people smell it

>>75305312
don't think this is true desu

>>75305352
this

>>75305312
I never leave the house anyway so it doesn't matter

>>75305312
women are attracted to the smell of semen because it contains pheromones

alright.

we've all had a good laugh.

now it's time to talk about something a bit more serious.

shitey bum? pissy wee? or simply, "poo"? what are your views?

>>75305312
i live near one of those trees that smells of cum so i can blame the tree

'Ate pakis
'Ate foreigners
'Ate leftists
Love pints

>>75305312
Do you not use a sock or napkin and just let the cum dry? WTF?

NEW

>>75305350
>>75305350
>>75305350
>>75305350
>>75305350

>>75305381
big fan of yummy bummy

>>75305312
How can they smell your cum? Do you cum on the wall or something?

>>75305409
*sniffs vigorously*
FUCK OFF PHONEPOSTER

>>75305269
My fave train station