/brit/

Eating a burger
Drinking pop

>>75252349
He's Brazilian

>>75252349
can you actually imagine looking like this, you would be getting stared at and approached wherever you go. Just a trip to the shops would get you a phone number each time.

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>not arsenal kit edition

Love during benzos hate after benzos simple as

>>75255066
cracking open a cold one with the boys

>>75253637
good lad

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>We are no longer accepting janitor applications. Thanks to all those who applied!

i know someone who thinks there the second coming

>>75255094
drilling open an icy one with every boy in the country

might unironically go to mcdonalds they just opened LOL

edit: apparently they opened 30 minutes ago

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me with the so-called 'sheed gf, boys

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at work. I'm warm, sweaty, need to poo and fart, very thirsty. send help

>>75255124
smashing open a subzero one with the entire male population

>>75255132
nice fridge bro

>>75255132
>me

But he doesn't have anglo facial features

>>75255125
it's almost as if *starts crying* we need to kill the shitskins, gooks and niggers, and retake the world *keeps crying expecting you to comfort me*

>>75255151
demolishing the lid of an absolute zero one with nuclear fission with every boy from every possible timeline

what year was your dad born?

mine 1972

>>75255094
>>75255124
>normie twitter memes

fuck off FONTs

>>75255184
68

>>75255132
I have to say that I like the feeling of having a very submissive gf

>>75255184
60s
My mum was 68 and I think my dad was 65 or 66

>>75255201
good kot. nice kot

>>75255094
>>75255124
>>75255151
yewww struth me friggen pru boys nothen better than lifting the shirt off of some bevvies with the lads n chewing the fat

>>75255132
>watch on the right hand

>>75255159
Yeah, he isn't ugly enough to be English

>>75255135
You there again lad? Every time I see you post you're at work. Might as well just live there and have done with it.

had day at work with the boys but camaraderie and chewing gum makes it bearable

reply to this post now bitch

>>75255184
unronically 1943

he had me at 50

hate soggy crunchy nut corn flakes

>>75255184
1962

>>75255184
1953, had me at 44

Always disliked white people, only one I like is Jeremy Corbyn.

Start my second shift of work in 2 hours
REEEEE

>>75255261
Hello hen

>>75255184
59

in love with a bi lad

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imagine the photo you're remembered for being a filtered snapchat photo

christ

it's quite fucked up, might as well remember her with a cartoon, it isnt her face

>>75255184
1905

>An army bomb disposal unit is at a college in Trafford, Greater Manchester Police says.


any checked up on sara?

>his dad was born in the 50s

good man

>His dad was born in the 60s

runt

>his dad was born in the 70s

kys

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ban't be arsed anymore

would probably convert to islam in a heartbeat if they let me have pints and stopped talking in arabic

>>75255330
fuck off old cunt

>>75255284
this is important

>Police investigating the Manchester Arena bomb attack have stopped sharing information with the US after leaks to the media

why is the united states so compromised

>>75255330
cheers, put a lot of effort into it

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can NOT stop listening to this song lads. vid's great too desu

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVuB1ZASrGw

>>75255350
Islam is pretty rubbish
Idk how it appeals to converts beyond giving these mindless runts some sort of strict purpose since they need someone to tell them how to live desperately

>>75255330
my da was born in the 40s what about me lad

didn't go to sleep until 5 am . woke up at 10:40 feeling more awake than ever

what is the optimal age for becoming a father?

>>75255380
becuz fuck drumpf

>>75255380
Didn't a fuckton of CIA agents get excecuted by the Chinese James Bond style recently?

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this man is a blood donor

pretty sure jean paul satre was a fucking pussy

want to roll a fat one

>>75255408
it aligns with everything I as a rorke like
except from the suicide, arabic, and no pints

>>75255425
35

>>75255425
28-32

>>75255425
28

>>75255357
cringe

>>75255448
alri albert

>>75255448
he was
stuff he did during WW2 gives u a proper opinion about how much of a nonce he was

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>>75255460
>>75255462

>>75255350
Just don't.

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8:14 PM and i've injested a litre of goon already

>>75255425
18, with your highschool sweetheart, whomst which happened to be your neighbour since you were 1 year old, and whos parents were your family friends

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lads :(

>>75255454
Only because you haven't looked much beyond it.
The most rorke faith is brahmanism

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love craft beer
love diversity
love pegging
hate misgendering
hate racists
hate cagers

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the gf

>>75253637
>pop

retard

>>75255509
not an sjw just dont like em simple as

>>75255504
Should just clone it and ignore all the benders that worry about ethics.

>>75255495
How haven't you got a gook yet? I've not been here a month and I've got one

>>75255184
1950

have three (3) gimmiques currently in circulation

jean paul satre- the runt manifest

>>75255541
I have

>>75255512
picadilly spotted

0 1 6 1

>>75255425
29-34

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>you will never, EVER be a dad

it's probably for the best but still

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>lightsaber found at scene of the crime

ISIS confirmed jedis

>>75255509
Can't wait until Mayweather batters this cunt.

>>75255425
Never, having children is signing your life away.

Bee finally got out.

Made some homemade bee repellent: Peppermint oil and cinnamon in a spray bottle. Didn't have peppermint oil but I had peppermint tea bags so I dunked those in the spray bottle with the cinnamon and water and shook it up. Sprayed this concoction all over my window. Smell's nice and I've seen a couple of bees approach and then zoom off manically. Very pleased with myself.

>>75255595
the opposite, idiot

Bee bit my bottom

>>75255541
he has and she's fit as fuck tbf

>>75255583
chuckled

jean paul sartre who was very severe towards collaborators and accused Céline heavily yet spent 39-45 sitting on his fat arse at the Flore translating the writings of the nazi heidegger (member of the NSDAP from 33 to 45) and threw a fit in front of the nazis during the occupation because he wanted his little play to be played in a theater
fuck him and anyone whos into his stuff

>>75255577
says who

women who don't have kids have 30-40% increased risk of cancer

>>75255612
>shackled to another human for at least 18 years

nah

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>>75255512
Bet if I died at the concert nobody would give me the same attention, not that I would want it though, all these empty "RIP :((((((((" tweets from rapid whores to try and get attention and look caring

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>>75255629
women

>>75255645
yeah they would. people turn into the biggest attention seeking runts when someone they know dies.

>>75255645
Be just your luck to be there though wouldn't it? Pictured in every newspaper with 12-14 year old girls and people questioning whether you're a nonce.

>>75255577
i could have been. had a wife who was ready for kids and i thought i probably was too. then it all got fucked up and now i'm old and sad and mid-divorce and will probably never have a family.

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getting on it early

Things that I rate: Fried eggs, The Sopranos, Jack Johnson, Interstellar.

Things that I do not rate: Paul Pogba

>>75255645
>rapid whores
mong

they only people who hate Sartre are right wingers

>>75255660
it's almost as if your personality is inherently divorcable
or maybe it's the fact that you shack up with the first woman who gives you attention

>>75255692
Typo, meant vapid

>>75255641
that other human is related to you like no other and will live after you die
next best thing after immortality

>>75255695
his plays are good but his "philosophy" work is a bit more questionable

>>75255497
Pints and sausages and bacon. How do you not like bacon, it's delicious.
Also, whats the problem with having a faithful hound as a companion? Cats can look nice but they're useless. Dogs are lads.

>women let men put their willies inside them and let them do a sex wee
Bit disgusting.

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>>75255697
>woman who gives you attention

>>75255678
how old are you lad?

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lianne

>>75255735
18.

>>75255735
34

>>75255730
women basically piss all over their fanny every time anyway

>>75255750
JANNY

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She read my message 9 hours ago but didn't reply

>>75255763
janny's gonna go nuts. said i was 14 once and got banned for a month haha

>>75255733
imagine all the great ugly men throughout history
they had shit going for them
you can have shit going for you too
life isn't reducible to a consensus on a 4chan board, believe it or not

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might be having a girl move in

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>>75255623
Now my bottom's big

>due to the increased security threat, we've decided to postpone the brexit indefinitely

so... how about that vote?

Women are all worthless whores

some whore just went past my window at 120mph

rate: dogs, the boys at work, tasty snacks and treats like cadbury chocolate, mandarins, civic duty

dont rate: vanity, jean paul satre, any tattoos that aren't in the traditional tattoo format, roast beef

>>75255746
>>75255750
>>75255752
unsure which one to believe

>>75255780
No... No way. It was the EU all along.

Hate borders
Love Corbyn

Stellar post form the ol' 'ddit

https://www.reddit.com/r/europe/comments/6d7uw5/majority_of_britons_think_minorities_threaten_uk/di0o35a/?st=j349yegc&sh=08bc815f

>>75255735
1
2
what ya gonna do
who's on the microphone in the venue
*wheel up*

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Daily reminder girls take massive fat, greeny shits every day

looking to aquire a bf (boyfriend) for the purpose of having him physically abuse me

>>75255778
is she ur gf, so called gf or proto gf

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My favorite

>>75255814
wtf is a greeny shit

Thought spam was some disgusting poverty food. It it's pretty good
Been mixing it up with my noodles and made tacos For lunch today

>>75255823
so called new housemate

>eats dogs
>thinks he can comment on food

looking to acquire an alt-right gf

>>75255811
haha, thanks for the reddit post chum, haven't had time for my morning visit yet between cleaning all my sex toys

Oh this is great. Another bee got in, and he won't go anywhere near the window because of all the fucking bee repellent I sprayed around it. Looks like I have a roommate.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/world-us-canada-40019014/harvard-student-raps-his-thesis-and-graduates-with-honours

SSSSSSSHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

>>75255831
people give it in gift baskets in South Korea like it's some luxury item

>>75255814
if you poo everyday you're probably obese.

2-3 days is normal.

>>75255862
fucking yanks

>>75255867
Gone without taking a shit for a week desu

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need a colourful gf

reckon domestic violence is slated for a comeback

love pints

>>75255865
there's literally more fat in spam than there is meat

>>75255750
ahahaha

>>75255867
poo two or three times a day, skinny and very fit

>>75255776
Only 40% of men who ever lived reproduced

the janny temp banned me already for saying I was 16 hahahahahahaha HOWLING I am unironically 24

quick draw mcpoor are janny

if a woman gets her shit done in by her husband she should hit back instead of acting scared or snitching

I like having empty bowels so I squat-poo once a day

God reached his hand down from the sky
he flooded the land then he set it afire
he said "fear me again,
know i'm your father,
remember that noone can breathe underwater"

>>75255920
and the majority of those 40% are ugly

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGD9wEr9Zkc

what happened to the cross dressing Aussie aha x

>>75255851
hahahahahahah why the fuck are you going to live with a female that isn't your gf hahahahahhahahahahhaha

bomb squad sent to the house opposite my friend
made a joke that i put the bomb there to try and kill him, reckon gchq will be flying through my window any minute now

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>>75255949
True

no comment

i'll follow you deep sea baby

>>75255975
if he focused more on his career he would be above the chad in the work ladder no?

>>75255975
didnae read this comic

>>75256010
Extroversion and charisma is useful in work life too. Childhood bullies tend to go far in life.

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>>75255975
not sure what your problem is
you admit women are worthless whores yet resent them when they don't want to sleep with you
if you were good looking you wouldn't reproduce, you would imitate the behaviour of the whores
i don't understand

>>75255966
gchq are overrated and underfunded

diet coke isn't as bad as I remember

did they improve the recipe?

>>75255929
you're a fucking weird bloke
why do you make these posts?

>>75256059
defend yourself simple as

>>75255958
she's not moving into my room lad

>>75255678
how'd it get fucked up

>>75256079
i disagree, if a women re-heems a man who has heemed her, she might get doubleheemed. better to call the pigs and let them heem him than risk a doubleheem

>>75256086
that's the problem lol

der deutscher amerikaners have a containment thread yet they refuse to post in it
makes u think

>>75256079
>simple as
they're learning

the frenchman is my friend

>>75256104
well she has to doubleheem the man first then until he learns his lesson

>>75256146
women don't have the upperbody heem strength we have
all they can do is send a message that says heeming them isn't free

>>75256106
even if I had a gf I wouldn't want her living in the same room as me
need my privacy

>>75256146
humans don't learn lessons easily. especially lessons thrown by little girly arms, arms themselves possessed by a women i just beat into submission last night

>>75256178
have a feeling you'll have all the privacy you need in the future

in order of safeness from terror attacks
>low muslim population
>high muslim population
>medium muslim population

>>75256089
realised we were kind of bored when we went out together, sex life was dead, didn't have much to talk about, that sort of thing. did a year of counselling, got nowhere so we called it a day.

>>75256190
*bounces your head off the marble bath tub*

>>75256191
mine isn't there

>>75256191
Me when I see a racist post.

stupid runts have turned the AC way up and now it's fucking freezing

>>75255201
cute!

hate it when some runt leeches my shit on the 'seek because my upload speed is quite low so it takes a while

>>75256218
life is exhausting

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yeah we'll have one pint of barlsberg, two boronas and 3 packets of bheese and onion brisps please mate

>>75256254
yeah, not a fan

>>75256255
*c-walk in front of you*
wats good cuhh

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>Congratulations and welcome – your application for The Platinum Cashback Everyday Credit Card from American Express® has been approved.
got approved for the ultimate meme amex card lads.

yeah i'll have one pint of no gf, two that feel and 3 packets of when and no gf please mate

>>75256279
nigger

>>75256242
Just put the heating on for a bit.

>>75256255
Fantastic display of understanding of American Culture™

lilo & snitch

>>75256261
i'm sorry for the pain that has caused, hope u can find something that gives you purpose

reccomend boxing desu

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>Tired of crooked politicians and broken promises, Lorp is perfectly fine with not even voting during this presidential election cycle. They’re all the same, anyway, aren’t they?

>But when Lorp’s roommate introduces him to the hot, handsome democratic socialist Bernie Sambers, Lorp immediately starts to change his tune. Soon enough, they are at a Bernie rally supporting the sexiest candidate in the game.

>However, things start getting fishy once wilderness creatures begin showing up at the event. How is Bernie so perfect, anyway? Could some sort of magic be involved? Lorp finds his answers soon enough in a political anal reaming that will have your jaw on the floor!

>This erotic tale is 4,000 words of sizzling human on unicorn presidential candidate action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and gay democratic socialist love.

havent emptied my bin since easter
doing so now

>>75256305
Amazing response

>>75256344
How is this even possible

>>75256343
dire pecs

>>75256360
It's a big bin

It's 6 AM here in the states

should I have myself a drink?

http://www.chucktingle.com/

>>75256343
who buys this shit? how does this guy make money

>>75256369
for you

>>75256385
you can shit in a box and put it online and someone'll say it's brilliant and buy it

why do we procrastinate? what evolutionary advantage does procrastination confer?

nothing beats an icy cold beer after work

>>75256194
High population muslim countries are bombed way more than the others, what are you talking about?

too hot to wank

>>75256405
uk cities not countries

>>75256400
it offers none, which is why whites are going extinct and shitskins flourishing

>>75256400
energy conservation

>>75256334
cheers lad

>>75256385
Got a Kindle Fire with adverts so every time you go to unlock it you get an advert for a book.

About 60% are these shitty romance books for women that have a half naked muscly man on the front and some stupid story with BESTSELLER on it.

>>75256428
then why doesnt every animal procrastinate

just wanked to something i'm not supposed to

>>75256447
do middle age women with kindles really buy that much gay porn literature

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>>75256279
you wanna take this outside you bheeky bunt

>>75256400
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhFQA998WiA

POOPOO P OP O OOP PPOOOO!!!!!!!!!! WILLY WILLY WILLY WANKY WANKY WILLY PAKI POO POO ARSE BUM!!!!!!!!!!!! WANKERRR WILLY PAKI FANNY POOPOOPOO PO PO P OP OP

>>75256446
godspeed

>>75256484
kind of answered your question in asking it

>>75255678
haha what are you like

>>75256455
Intelligent ones generally do

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>>75256484
Forget to mention those ones are straight, never seen any gay porn advertised.

The straight ones middle aged women like are ones like this.

Been only paying for things in cash for the past 2 months 2bh

captcha: China lands

>>75256039
I'm memeing you, lad. I do however think that comic is true to reality

>>75256520
but i have no knowledge if 30-50 year old women do happen to purchase homosexual literature or not

>>75255958
They're the easiest girls to find ?

>>75256508
was just thinking of making a post like this

got an insane amount of homosexual literature

>>75255184
1958

I'm the youngest of 4 children so my parents had me when they were pretty old (35 and 37)

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>>75256580
This is part of my collection

>>75256590
how mentally challenged are you?

>>75255184
1984

>>75256542
i gotta disagree with you on that one

>>75255184
>>75255266
About the same actually, he died two year ago and he was 71, cba working it out.

Mum and dad were older than most, there was a 15 year gap between mum and dad though.

>>75256570
What is the benefit of living with a female that isn't a friend or gf?

>>75256447
>Got a Kindle Fire with adverts so every time you go to unlock it you get an advert for a book.
Jej

Just root it

There are pc programs that you just tap a few buttons and it will do it all for you

>>75256425
Ah. AH. This is probably true.
Luton will never be bombed but neither will Norwich.

>>75256590
Respectable. Traditional family. I wish I had known a stable family environment.

>>75256549
i like to think they do

>>75256654
Really doesn't bother me desu because I only use it on the toilet and when I'm wanking, and it's also just a shit tablet.

already 1pm hahaha wahhey

>>75256669
LMAO

>>75256651
you never lived with your mother or a sister?

>>75256671
i like to think they're all nice old christian ladies with no moral faults, but i know that's not true. emotions aren't truth

>>75256646
same mate, my dads 74 now but he's quite active and fit

how'd your dad go?

>>75256605
Actually the smartest person in my family haha

Oldest sibling is a junior doctor, but I'm a Cambridge CompSci graduate so I think that trumps their medicine desu

>>75256651
they pay a share of the rent

>>75256010

need to wee

>>75256725
So do men, except there will be less dramas, no dealing with hormonal periods, and men generally have better personalities.

>>75256711
Cancer desu, was just bad luck, he didn't seem 71 at all, he looked like he was in his 50s. People in my family seem to look younger and live longer, hopefully I've inherited that. My gran is 92 and looks and seems younger people in their 70s. She still drives, plays bowls, does everything.

Ah yes, the choice between getting a bus to work and being 40 mins early or walking through the 43C valley of the shadow of death JUST to pour some pints for some normies

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melting lad

>>75256719
so you play on a computer all day while he saves lives?

>>75256770
don't hold it in go

>>75256773
Have you ever lived with non related females? They're literally the same as dudes but they are cleaner and will occasionally get drunk and suck your willy

>>75256780
>talking pics of little kids

fucking nonce

>>75256777
sorry mate

did he smoke?

>>75256780
nonce

am bricklayer

>>75256780
nonce

>>75256807
>but they are cleaner
Hahahaha
Aha hahahahahahahaha

No.

>>75256786
your bang out of order there mate

>>75256814
>>75256818
fucks sake didn't even realise there was someone in the shot

>>75256780
scouse rat

>>75256837
Okay, not cleaner. They're messier but they won't live with filth as long as men

>>75256773
dont know what to make of this post, but am going to speculatively call you underage

>>75256786
ahh yes every doctor saves lives
hate that myth

scousers truly have the gift of the gab

>>75256786
She*, but yeah pretty much

I have a comfy job in the city, she works like 80 hours a week

>>75256822
awroight nolezy

>>75256807
>>75256856
t. subhuman females

*evaluates life with a critical eye*

'ckin 'ell

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melting lad (not a nonce edition)

>>75256857
Some are called Shipman
HEY YO

>>75256780
Wavertree nonce

>>75256807
>cleaner
Fuck no. My bogan flatties in a utterly destroyed part of Christchurch were cleaner than every female flatmate I've ever had

>>75256869
is she good looking?
there's a sickness in me that needs curing

>>75256880
>OI MATE, OI! YEAH YOU! MOVE OUTTA MY SHOT I GOTTA TAKE A PICTURE FOR /BRIT/

Katie Hopkins threat level raised from 'public irritant' to ‘toxic shit fountain’

>>75256893
Come on lad that's not fair, I tried again

>>75255072
>>75255072
>>75255072
>>75255072
>>75255072
>>75255072
old new

>>75256894
They're from Linwood. Admit it.
Good tinny house in Linwood desu

>>75256905
where are all these outside tim pics from? his twitter? never goes outside on his vids