Mentally-ill ASMRfu edition
I FUCK YER MADERS
kelv
bara
/brit/ is OFFICIALLY a pro-Assad general
>>74071031
which one is that la?
>>74071031
can you stop making these completely S H I T E editions?
>>74071108
>>74071112
galoshes
>>74071118
FOL
>>74071040
i fuckt yer madder
the gf
tay
can't respect a man who measures weight in kilograms
Post slags
>>74071108
wasnt he the bad guy in cod4?
>>74071163
me on the right
>>74071031
LINK you cunt if you're make these shite editions
>>74071167
>teeth
0/10 at most
TOT
>>74071151
like a bit softly desu want a tori or gibi gf more though
>>74071163
Me with the weird body in the back
DURRR hai guise did yuu know a new Star Warz movie is gonna come out? Mr. Goldberg's latest artistic production is sure to be a hit with the plebians!
>>74071163
cuter than tay 2bh
>>74071188
he's the good guy in ww3
tried to post using mobile data earlier and was blocked due to someone posting from the ip on /ck/ and calling the mods nazis
own up, who did it?
>>74071163
swif
this yank really doesn't like star wars
>>74071232
How come they've started putting the plastic ring holders half way down the cans now?
What kind of Algerian is called 'Alan'???
>>74071232
>cider
neck yourself ya shemale
bought some chinese chilli oil. really tasty but spicy as fuark
>>74071203
how to construct phrases of the english? thank
>>74071213
as would i, but gibi strikes me as someone who is actually more sane/well adjusted than most of the people making that content
Hmmmmmmm
Haveing a big think about this one lads
>>74071210
TINY
>>74071278
Alan's Snackbar
Work it out
>>74071288
Gibi is a turbo-normie
>>74071288
fuck you cunt give a link pls
>>74071210
*kisses your dick skin*
gotta get swifty in heere, ahaha
WILLIES OF /BRIT/
post spurdos
Is it weird my gf wants to go to a hot tub party at some lads house for a work thing?
Other people from her work will be there but the lad checks her out all the time. For the record she agreed they use the tub and her and the lad are very close
why doesnt anyone clamp down on those youtube mp3 sites?
music industry must lose tens of billions a year from them
>2017
>buying chicken breast and not thighs
HOWLING
>>74071333
would love to sniff those sweaty shorts desu
>>74071382
this 2bh
bone in is a goodness
>>74071361
>>74071370
no real advice here because I've never spoken to a three dimensional girl but really fantastic image choice
>>74071296
Netherlands and Poland confirmed for Good Goyim
i'm really awkward irl
>>74071374
they're not losing anything. They're just not earning any more.
>>74071333
>Lupica won gold medals in the high hurdles (meet record 14.78), then won the 100 meter dash (12.41), she was a part of the district record setting 4x100 meter relay (48.94) and capped it off with a gold medal in the 300 meter hurdles (47.23)
atta gal
>>74071351
https://www.youtube.com/user/softlygaloshes
Which Pepe best sums up your feelings right now?
>>74071438
*looks at you and walks away without replying*
>>74071468
cheer m8
>>74071495
(You)
(You) (You)
(You) (You) (You)
(You) (You) (You) (You)
(You) (You) (You)
(You) (You)
(You)
>>74071495
>>74071419
thank you, that's the nicest post I've encountered on /brit/
>>74071361
>>74071495
feeling devilish and thinking of phoning in sick to work tomorrow when i'm perfectly well
>>74071031
>regularly have meetings with an American manager on a project I have volunteered for
>Always makes weird jokes like "is it beer o'clock there?"
>pretend to laugh
>my contract is extended
Any tricks to deal with the Amerilords? might become CEO
just did ' 'k to cherry
>>74071499
n-no
>>74071541
What flag is this? East Yorkshire?
>>74071558
Taste, texture, price
>>74071594
good lad
>>74071594
wtf that's my sister
>>74071606
wrong wrong maybe
>>74071585
Talk about the baseball
I WAS LOOKING FOR A JOB, AND THEN I FOUND A JOB...
>>74071558
doesnt go dry unless you cook the fuck out of it
cheaper
>>74071596
derbs
>>74071612
thanks
>>74071618
interesting
feeling very sleepy lads
struggling to keep my eyes open
but i want to stay up, since nighttime is the only chance i get for some peace when my family is asleep
>tfw spent the last 2 days making quality posts without any (You)'s
>>74071594
wtf that's my brother
>>74071569
Hahahahaha holy shit
>tfw spent the last 2 days making quality posts without any (You)'s
>>74071677
making posts where
>>74071677
i like you
>>74071668
set an alarm for 4am
My laptop is trying to stream to my fucking TV in the other room
Why is this even happening ,technology is too confusing
nuke the french y/n?
>>74071718
/Brit/
need more shows like What happens in Kavos to vicariously live the life a young brit on vacation.
http://www.esquire.co.uk/culture/film/news/a14490/tom-hardys-odds-to-play-james-bond-have-been-slashed-after-real-life-act-of-heroism/
>>74071765
just paris for bantz
>>74071746
flux capacitor is on the blink methinks
>.co.uk
>>74071773
caught my mum looking at pictures of him with her hand down her pants once
>>74071768
>making quality posts
there you go lad there's your problem
you need bait and shitposts, meme about gibraltar you'll get those (You)'s rolling in
>>74071834
post mum
>>>
>>74071773
I hope its not Idris Elba just because it will make all these fannies pissed off
hate normals
freespace 2 was a great game
homeworld as well
>there are northerners in this thread
GUFFAWING
>mum
>>74071881
>normals
normie get out lol :DDDD
>the gf wants me to beat her up in bed
Hmmm no
>>74071852
*absconds this mortal realm*
*assumes my astral form*
*ascends into a higher being*
*assails the vast sea of stars*
alri
>>74071773
>The name's Bondlet, James Bondlet
THICC
>>74071922
haha for real?
would do your mum
>>74071920
I give my gf an almighty smacking in bed fairly regularly, and she loves the bruises afterwards
give it a go
>>74071939
*melts your arse and makes several tupperware boxes*
>>74071108
Assad is an actual mong ngl
>inb4 muh dictators for stability and peace
Ah yes, presiding over a war which killed 400,000 people and threw the region into chaos, what a strong leader.
>>74071958
you're waifu pillow doesn't count
How many murders do you think you've witnessed on LiveLeak, 4chan, etc.? What was the worst snuff/shock video you ever saw?
What's it like living under a monarch lads?
>>74071920
tell her i will if you wont
>>74071992
certainly in the triple figure range
>>74071992
the grifter was my worst
Honestly can't quite get why yanks think driving a manual is so difficult
>>74071954
yeah
well thanks i guess
Put £500 into this lads
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1349068120/beyond-borders-a-film-celebrating-unity
>>74072005
She wants pics in advance mate x
Haha Lib Dems will do literally ANYTHING to get into power
Since UKIP collapsed they are the new meme party
>>74071993
every day i pray to the queen or else i get shot by the royal guards
t. knower
>>74071992
4 men 1 hamner
>>74071992
nothing beats the mexican drug violence shit
>>74071895 yeah
>>74072019 yeah
>>74071843 yeah
>>74071992
probably under 20 desu
can't believe I wasted half an hour on that underwhelming wank
>>74071987
>Ah yes, presiding over a war which killed 400,000 people and threw the region into chaos, what a strong leader.
Nice Jewish propaganda, mate
I bet you believe people are staving on North Korea too
>this is the average American office in 2017
how can anyone work in a place like this?
honestly cubicles are better than this mess, at least you can focus and not worry about someone watching you all the time
>>74071992
Watched a shitton of ISIS mass executions and battles ngl
Probably thousands, minimum, if counting VBIEDs which kill dozens in one go
>>74071992
3 maybe 4 figure range
the one that was doing the rounds recently was pretty bad, the mexican face skin peel hand stumps one
>>74072019
It's not hard
Auto is just easier
Join the 21st century m80
I don't *want* to spank attractive girls, but sometimes they're naughty
>>74072054
every mistake you make is a lesson
>>74072054
what happened? :c
http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/article/39705734/stealthing---what-you-need-to-know
>>74072019
its not difficult, just pointless and outdated
thankfully car companies are slowly phasing them out
>>74071992
0 and i intend to keep it that way
need a girl to show me her fanny so I dont need to wear this stupid t shirt
>>74072076
>staving
handing out a (you) to encourage you to spell better in the future
>>74071992
the one with some religion of peace practitioners slaughtering a group of russian (i think?) military lads, halal style
>>74071990
h-hi
>>74072076
>alt-right now has the same view on foreign policy as the far-left
Time truly is a flat circle
just extinguished a cigarette on my hand
hmmm...on reflection I don't think I shall be doing that again
>>74072032
literally any candidate ourside of Nireland would have to say that in order to get elected. Not sure how that makes them a 'meme'. Runt.
>>74072094
Ah yes, I remember that. Still not as bad as the Venezuelan cannibalism video though
> drink half a bottle of vodka every night
> spend every day feeling tired and lethargic
> stay off the drink
> still spend every day feeling tired and lethargic
lmaoooo hahahahahah
>>74072134
hey x h r u?
>>74072139
Socialism is redpilled and pro-white
>>74072054
>>74072097
>>74072107
why are reddit flaggers such fucking aids?
>>74072080
is that wil wheaton talking to the asian guy
>>74072112
>In non-legal language, it means that if you agree to having sex with a condom and remove it, without saying, then you no longer have consent.
>Then it is rape.
I think most people can get on board with that
>>74072118
>just pointless and outdated
>actually deciding what gear your car is in is outdated
>>74072174
bit hungry ngl wbu
just pulled out my best gimmick and it was ignored
>he's here
>>74072191 yeah
>>74072176 yeah
>>74072175 yeah
>>74072176
aren't you the reason they started operation yewtree?
>>74072080
woah
so this is the powerhouse of American industry and innovation
and people call us manchildren
>>74072166
>Venezuelan cannibalism
which one?? link?
got a spare SD card dunno what to do with it
how does it feel to knock someone out
>>74072191
>need to get consent before you have sex
>no you need to get consent repeatedly, not just at the start
>fucking rapist
>>74072203
thats not good, get some grub lid
im okay
>>74071933
haha
*steps on specialist heavy duty cattle scales*
*reading show 190kg*
ah yes...time to /brit/post....
>>74072228
Shove it up your dad's dick paki
>>74072171
stay off the booze for a while, then work in some exercise (high intensity cardio some days, lifting others), sort your diet out (importantly cutting out any added sugar foods) and you will feel a LOT better.
Trust me senpai
assumed stealthing was only a problem for gay men who are getting pozzed.
why would a man do a to a woman? if she gets pregnant he can be court ordered to provide her support
>>74072232
never done but I've come close during sparring
it felt quite good 2bh, I could see his arms go loose and he was wobbling. I kept trying to hit him harder to get a knockout blow before the coach stepped in but couldn't do it in time.
>>74072257
>190kg
>heavy duty cattle scale
( ._.)
business idea: operation (you)tree
>>74072171
>If I stop drinking I'll feel better
don't feel better
>If I stop smoking I'll feel better
don't feel better
>If I stop eating rubbish I'll feel better
don't feel better
>If I get fit I'll feel better
don't feel better
absolutely howling at myself
>>74072280
hmmm almost like people can make questionable decisions in the pursuit of pleasure
>>74072269
I know you're right but this alcohol habit (dare I say.... addiction) I've cultivated over the past 4 years is rather hard to get rid of
maybe I need to get help
you wanna piece of meat boy
What can you do on one day in London?
>>74072241
okay
>gf no longer has 'last seen' on WhatsApp
What did she mean by this?
>Brexit stole the future away from young people!
how? you can still work in Europe, live in Europe, get educated in Europe. just get a visa. not that hard.
also the implication of young people wanting a future where they fuck off out of the UK doesn't sound very patriotic at all.
Post THAT picture
You know the one
i'm unironically addicted to smoking.
never start it la's.
>>74072334
you could have a wank if you wanted to
>>74072336
whats gwanin with you?
>>74072344
shes busy text later
>>74072357
>>74072344
i turned mine off too
>>74071370
PLEASE help me lads all my friends are asleep
>i'm unironically addicted to smoking.
>never start it la's.
>>74072357
looooooool still can't believe he licked her batty in the club
>>74072171
>>74072316
Depression is based in neural networks, not lifestyle choices.
It's hardwired, dose up or live with it.
>>74072357
>>74072374
bit hungry ngl wbu
>>74072334
Pub tour
Visit the Arsenal
Ride the circle line
Stop drinking alcohol
>>74072387
dont care
Business idea: retroactively remove consent for removal of condom and receive child support PLUS damages!
>>74072030
>£111k for fuck borders and shiet, the film
every day i get closer to starting one of these ridiculous pleas
>>74072391
why the FUCK are your friends asleep
are you 12???
>>74072334
depends what type of person you are
>>74072080
>Open plan
AHHHHHH FUCKING END IT
When I was younger I told my parents I wanted to be a businessman and work in an office. I was of course under the impression that people actually had their own rooms to work in.
Imagine my surprise when I realised I will never have an office of my own unless I stsrt my own company and make it that way.
Even the directors at my office sit with the regular staff in open plan. Dampened a lot of my ambition to progress to management.
>>74072357
is sucking you own willy gay lads?
i mean it hurts my back a little bit if i do it for too long and always say no homo before i start
>>74072280
>pozzed
Got I hate that word so fucking much
>>74072316
>tfw didn't do any of that, but got a gf and now my depression is cured
Good feel.
Amazing the effect a bit of human contact can have ngl
>190kg
>welsh
>virgin
>addicted to smoking
>shitposts incessentantly on /brit/ despite having an "active social life"
>>74072422
the plums after a heavy one on the bottom
>>74072422
me on the bottom
>>74072440
*111k for 'pay for my holiday/virtue signalling expedition' pls
>>74072422
oh ok, i'll stop enjoying getting drunk and having social drinks forever because i want to keep my health!
>lives longer, doesn't have as much fun
>dies anyway
>>74072408
thats not good, get some grub lid
im okay
>>74072422
if it's a healthy liver then what's it doing on a table
>God is dead
>>74072435
bit rude
>>74072460
would lick her fanny because i'm straight
Made a PENG chicken & lentil curry lads
>>74072495
surprising good yank post
>>74072460
used to think the crevasse of a fanny was an extended buttcrack
>>74072460
gf has a body like this except she's more thicc/chubby from the waist down
>Hey anon, why don't you come around and take a selfie with us? Don't be shy!
>>74072520
>licking fanny
>straight
ummmmmmm sweaty........
>>74072529
recipe?
>>74072537
>gf
No one believes you.
>>74072422
frick nbo
>>74072543
hello nigger
>>74072537
>gf has a body like this except it's not like this
>>74072520
how far in the closet are you mate
>>74072543
The weak must fear the strong
>putting your mouth were a mens dicks have been
???
sounds bent
>>74072216
>>74072446
>>74072080
Ah yes, here we see the born-in-captivity runt, terrified by the sight of open spaces, yearning for the safe confines of his runt pen
>>74072422
you first
time for bed wagecucks ahahahahahhaa
If Madeline McCann was alive now and came onto you, would you shag her?
>>74071992
hard to say what affected me the most
the most brutal is that fairly recent one where they cut his face and hands off, then slowly cut his throat while sucking the blood out with a tube so he doesn't choke to death
>>74072558
Trust me my dude
http://www.foodpleasureandhealth.com/2014/12/bombay-style-chicken-red-split-lentils.html
>>74072481
this is approved by Him
just thought you should know
never licked a fanny, only put my dick in 'em because I'm not a bitchboy
>>74072632
>14
nonce
>>74072520
ludicrous display last night
How did ArsenalCustomerTV people afford to go to every Arsenal game before their youtube blew up/youtube existed
>>74072626
haven't drank in probably a month, and before that maybe 2 months
>licking a hole were men put their penises and climax
VERY gay
>>74072632
she'd nearly be 14, so still probably no.
maybe in a few years though
>>74072650
Me neither, a man could get whacked for doing that.
Junior Soprano enjoys it though.
>>74072678
One of the guys got a fridge dropped on him or something and got loads of compensation.
Another one works as banker in the city
want to lick a willy and fanny at the same time while they engage in intercourse.... not bi
>licking a fanny that used to be a child's fanny
nonce
>>74072632
too old
managing director seen me throwing up in the toilet earlier
>reading the biographies of famous musicians who grew up lower middle class or poor
>they all started their careers after attending prestigious universities (or dropping out of them) and presumably did very well in high school (iggy pop is an excellent example)
These hedonists from a lowly background performed well in schooling far better than a shut-in like me could, and worse is they aren't necessarily intelligent either. This is why I love Morrissey. He is the sperg's representative in the music world and reacted poorly to rigorous schooling.
>>74072357
>licking a vag where cocks have been inside
gay
>sucking a cock where no cocks have been inside
straight
>>74072684
literal perfection
Just had 4 McDonald's cheeseburgers
>>74072660
>>74072688
>>74072725
wew thought she'd be older
not a nonce btw
>>74072688
>she'd nearly be 14
Fuck, her parents have been making a living off her murder for over a decade
>>74072730
>smart but doesn't put in the effort meme xDDD
>>74072724
got a new job as the lib dem spokesperson for the act of exiting the eu
my mum's wenger in blud
IS SHE MAD?!
Go to bed wagecuck
Don't want to be tired for you 6AM wake up time, do you?
>>74072714
>got a fridge dropped on him
>did you support arsenal before the brain injury?
>>74072714
do you know which ones are them?
>>74072775
too late m8
Favorite DAMN. track lads?
YAH. or FEEL. for me, Clive.
>>74072605
aah you don't kiss girls either, how does that go down?
Best era lads?
>>74072813
would place my tongue on her bumhole because I'm straight
>>74072446
>>74072612
fuck off
you've obviously never had to work in an office if you honestly think open plan is anything but awful to work in, MUCH more than cubicles by a mile
pic related is what every Microsoft employee used to get before they switched to open plan
>>74072781
I knew I'd get this, but to be fair I received a mediocre education that I largely rejected because of bullying, low self-esteem, and the way I was raised. I'm of average intelligence. I just know I could have done as good if not better than people like Iggy Pop if I had only put the effort in.
trump supporter screamed "cuck" in my ear as he was having a heated argument with another student across the lecture hall
state of it
>>74072685
proud of you x
>>74072837
>yah
pleb tier
>>74072818
would still fuck that one at the top 2bh
anyone who lets a little bit of poo put them off is a nancy
and that poo is mainly water
>>74072837
kendrick went to shit after GKMC
I've heard parts of his new albums and he sounds boring and preachy, simple shan't
If I minimized my net worth, would you still love me?
STATE of /int/
http://www.strawpoll.me/12821798/r
http://www.strawpoll.me/12821798/r
>>74072848
i was about to make an eerily similar post
>>74072844
There was an era before the first one in that image.
You lads wouldn't have liked it though.
>>74072844
memes in 2016 stopped becoming harmless humour and started becoming political propaganda actively spread on social media
things are heading down a dark path
reckon there'll be a reactionary meme era soon
>>74072921
have got a room to myself most of the time in work desu
Think Jesus pulled the best social experiment in human history
>>74072837
DNA or ELEMENT
fuck sake
got pissed but i've got work in 7 hours
>>74072612
>>74072080
>the women are too loud
>these stuffed animals keep falling on my desk
>one of the nu-males keeps trying to rope me into his office charity work excursion
>its too bright in here and my head hurts
>one of the office puppies took a poo on my bag
>mandatory ball-pit break in 15 minutes
>just trying to get my work done
>I want to die
Talked to a qt outside the library today about the state of international politics
Meanwhile my gf doesn't even know where Syria is
I really know how to choose them
>>74072953
dont get this
>>74072953
NOT A LEDGE INTIMATE FORM OF PROWTEST
favourite damn track is
>WE WUZ JEWS.
>>74072923
a warm tight wet hole is a warm tight wet hole 2bh
https://twitter.com/LateTackle/status/849257150148993024?s=09
creasing
>>74072837
keep changing my mind on this. was element, but has also been DNA and XXX
also I thought love was a really good track but people seem to dislike it
>>74072991
What kind of twat wants to spend their time discussing poolitics
Every single rapper goes to shit after their debut/breakthrough albums
Sad!
open plan is alright if there are sufficiently tall dividers or strategically placed plants and filing cabinets
the noise doesn't distract me... it's white noise so it helps to focus .
you're accessible all the time... but just tell them to give you a minute
the only bad thing is when you can sense people staring at you or you can't look around/stare into space without seeming nosy
>>74072970
Get pissed enough to sleep, drink a lot of water and get to bed.