/brit/

STILL not in work yet

Oh yeah, I went to bed last night when he posted that, anything else happen with it?

what happened earlier

was there a 'cideman or summat?

you on your period m8?

bluh y ell

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>>74005203
>work in 90 minutes ago

>>74005215
nah dont think he went through with it.

whats wrong with britshits?

scientists in 500 years will look back on today and say
>how the FUCK did they make french synthwave sound so good?

>>74005146
Any three after May's noncery comes to light next Tuesday.

Basically what I'm saying upsets fundamentally depend on unpredictable events, you won't get there by looking at current trends, if you could the bookies give good odds anyway.

wanking my winkle

>>74005215
>>74005218
"A few threads back one of the two Nirish posters posted videos of him charged up on speed or something talking about how he wanted to go out and hit someone and punching walls, doing the bane monologue. Then he said he sliced his wrists because he wanted to die and was writing /brit/ in blood on his desk. Then posted some more photos of him by a train station saying he was getting the bolloxks up to kill himself because apparently he's in trouble with the local loyalist gang and he's scared of them.

Basically he was in a drug-induced psychosis but he's in a taxi home now

Bent twat"

>>74005272
what did he mean by this?

>>74005287
tim's a nonce

the patients lmao

>>74005272
It's 'implicated in' for fuck's sake

morning lads

>>74005298
I'm still laffin

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>>74005271
wank mine too, ta

>>74005286
Probably the same lad who has been going on and on about loyalist gangs recently.

>>74005304
that's what he said

Alri lads, I've made up my mind.

Will propose to the gf this year.

>>74005334
rip

>>74005272
>implying implications

How often do you's shave your pubes?
had to today because they got caught under my foreskin after i wee haha (grower haha)

>>74005286
remember him posting last week. guess it all came to a head

>>74005328
TURTLEMONG

>>74005334
She's not 2D, is she?

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can't get over how asians look like downies

or is it downies who look asian?

>>74005334
very happy for you lad, i'll come to the wedding x

wonder how tim was able to function at the guitar shop

maybe he can turn the ol' 'phrenia on and off

turtlemong posted a pic of his arsehole yesterday. i did not enjoy it

want to be a 4chan janitor but don't have the independent wealth

>>74005387
pretty sure theres a vid of him at a piano shop

>>74005380
1 > 2 >>>> 3 >> 4

>>74005380

thailads girlfy on the right

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>>74005380
tfw to intelligent too have a foot fetish

>>74005387
he has ocd not schizo

Have we seen much commentary urging French voters to make history and elect first woman president?

>>74005387
Probably doesn't matter much how mental you act when you're spending that much on a guitar desu.

>>74005380
4 > 2 > 3 >1

2 is actually the prettiest but 4 looks VERY kinky which I can get behind.

Took a big poo

Feel a bit shaken. Give me a minute or two and ill be back at my desk

>>74005390

that was 'mosis

>>74005387
can only imagine the reaction of the staff when he tested the guitar

wouldnt mind a central asian gf. ideally a Kazakh.

>>74005407
'wrong'

2 > 4 > 3 >1

>>74005435
>>74005390
LINK

>>74005449
alri wrong lad

>>74005421
kek

>>74005421
Dunno neither speak french nor follow french current affairs and journalistic trends

>>74005420

how do you know

Bright sun = dark skin
not bright sun = white skin

then how are asians yellow???

>>74005457
incorrect

>>74005439
BORAT LMFAO

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>>74005421
I think she's the wrong kind of woman..

>>74005439
Had one from kyrgyzstan.

Was p good

>>74005455

SHAN'T

>>74005482
>yellow???

problematic post

>tfw no boyfriend (female)

Only thing that I'll concede to Arabs is that they do arse washing better than us. All toilets have a little hose to wash your arse with

for a bloke with a wookie arse like myself toilet paper just doesn't cut it and I often get clumps of shitty bog roll caught in my arse

>>74005494
kyrgyzstan has inferior uranium

>>74005482
East Asians are distant relation of Eskimos which is why they have narrow eyes as the sun reflected from the snow, they probably didn't have time to develop dark skin just like whites in Australia and South Africa are still white

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>just started snowing

>>74005532
>Eskimos
*Inuits

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>Le Pen is mightier than the sword

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>>74005522
they have those here too

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>>74005439
Alri but Caucasoid or Mongoloid?

You WILL be judged on your answer.

>>74005532
They're also short because eskimos have less surface area from which to lose heat.

>>74005532
so how long until japs are niggers?

>>74005522
bidets have existed here for decades lad.

>>74005543
Ho ho ho, is that a Chinaman over there in the snow? No no no, he my friend is an Eskimo

>>74005555
A mix obviously. thats why i said central asian.

got no bum gun

>>74005578
good post

>>74005578
only yanks say eskimo. its inuit.

>>74005569
As long as it takes for South Asian and black people in Europe to become white

Got disillusioned with females in politics when at one party a 10/10 Chad I know said women shouldn't be allowed to vote and my normally feminist sister and several other women unironically agreed with him just because he's hot.

>>74005575
yeah they were fashionable for a while but they aren't in all bathrooms

i know what a willy gf is but what's a fanny bf?

>>74005286
poor lad

Niamh (pronounced knee-am)

>>74005611
mystery that

>>74005603
>implying you wouldn't say that men shouldn't be able to vote to fuck a 10/10 qt

Neev (pronounced Niamh)

Niaeramuham (pronounced Neev)

girnrnick (pronounced gir-nick)

it's actually níamh

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Pizza for lunch, lads

>>74005720
mate, 'zas are ROUND

>>73987406
>>73987406
>>73987406
>>73987406
>>73987406
>>73987406
new

Mad Steve (pronounced what-a-fucking-lad-remember-when-we-were-on-tour-he-necked-two-pints-and-beat-up-this-spanish-waiter-then-in-the-same-night-he-fingered-this-slut-on-the-beach--in-front-of-her-friends-fucking-top-lad-like)

>>74005653
I wouldn't because I have the Dignity of Man.

> worked all week
> called into the work this weekend
> work the rest of the week
> will probably be called in this weekend
Ah, yes. The 7 day working week. Perfect work/life balance.

gímhíck (pronounced givvick)

glasgow (pronounced glass-cow)

aluminium (pronounced aluminium)

*rocks the casbah*

>>74005788
Ummmh... the Clash is Islamophobic.

*stomp stomp*
*clap*
*stomp stomp*
*clap*
*stomp stomp*
*clap*
*stomp stomp*
*clap*

just ate 6 gaietys in one sitting what am i like

>>74005788
*absolutely HATES it*

กิมมิก (pronounced gimmeek)

>>74005753
I work all waking hours every day of the week when I'm not shitposting, eating, or wanking. Even had an impromptu Skype meeting with my boss at 3 a.m. quite recently.

t. research fellow

WE WILL
WE WILL

>>74005807
something about being a disgrace cant remember the lyrics

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>>74005810

กิมมิก (pronounced ching chong bing bong sucky sucky 5 dorra hahaha)

>>74005788
imagine if the original lyric was "he thinks it aint halal" instead of kosher how would people deal with it on classic rock stations???

Jeremy Corbyn (pronounced Pee-Em).

>>74005836
bit racist

Jeremy Corbyn (pronounced Un-ee-lek-tab-ull)

>enjoying things
>having hobbies

absolute runt behaviour

>>74005819
I'm a security guard, so I mostly just sign people in or stare at a monitor.

Still, I need a day off at some point. Can't watch monitors and sign in contractors all day everyday.

>>74005833
is this from we can be heroes or her solo show

1st year of degree - worked hard - got high 2:1
2nd year of degree - worked hard - got high 2:1
3rd year(current) - worked really hard - on track for a low third.

Struggle to sleep, when I do I wake up with cuts all down my arms. Always wake at 5:30 am without fail even with blackout curtains up. Been grinding my teeth for the past 10 weeks.

Everything is crumbling around me and I have no control over anything in my life anymore.
I've put everything into this degree so I have no work experience, and I doubt I'll get the grades to go through into the Masters year. It's all downhill from here friends.

brit (pronounced P-oo)

cc: thailad: can you actually handwrite in thai
dont think i could put up with it

Listening to Best of Abba lads.

They were v. good.

Su-p-per Trou-p-per

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>>74005181
wtf man

>>74005874
might be yeah

>>74005810

runt of a biscuit

>>74005838
Heard Oliver's Army on the radio the other day and they didn't bleep out the nigger.

>>74005879
sounds like 'cide's your only option

>>74005807
On my Radio GoGah by Genesis

>>74005836
Crying

>>74005879
killed the mood Mr.Bummer

cc: Bruce, bcc: /brit/
I try to avoid it when ever possible. So hardly ever. My handwriting is English is bad enough.

>>74005879
haha great stuff

>>74005892
it wasnt a yes or no question

haha enjoy not being in EU and enjoy being poor fucking losers

>>74005879
What is your degree?

>>74005879
go to a doctor. They won't be able to help with your degree but might be able to help with the depression and lack of sleep x

>>74005879
Spent a few nights sitting on Eastbourne cliffs contemplating the old 'cide and I will tell you this lad:

Man up and deal with it tbqh.

>>74005928
I'm already poor faggot

>>74005928
cuck

The rest of /int/ are being embarrassed by this thread again lads.

I've started taking nominations for 2017 /brit/ Personality of the Year.

Feel free to nominate a poster YOU feel positively adds to the /brit/ community.

System.ass.pooln("fuck yooo world")
end.this.shit;

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>>74005951
>thailand

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>>74005959
good

>>74005959
stick around. in 5 ill post an extraordinary post

>>74005959
>implying i care about what non-brits think

>>74005967
Will definitely be reading all this.

been diagnosed with 'pression for nearly a year and the only time dad's mentioned it is to make a joke and say arsenal are causing it

>>74005967
cuck

cc: thailad
neatness of it isnt what i meant, i mean how do you even remember the tiny differences in characters in general
i imagine its easier on keyboards because every fuck up can be undone easily

https://twitter.com/BBCr4today/status/856432571848241152

thoughts?

>>74005967
If I buy a woman from abroad will she get corrupted if I let her interact with our society?

Don't fancy keeping her locked up.

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>>74005974
Accurate.

>nominations for 2017 /brit/ Personality of the Year
>in April of 2017

absolute mong

Keep getting those threatening letters telling me to get a TV licence.

How do I get them to fuck off for good?

been diagnosed with light headedness due to too much blood going to my enormous cock whenever i get an erection and also hyperfertility syndrome meaning i get erections all the time and can last during sex for literally days what do i do lads can't just keep numbing the pain with threesomes and fucking peoples gfs?

>>74006019
fucking idiot it follows the football season

>>74006021
ignore them.

How do we make 'lads' more gender neutral? If non binary person came to this thread I image they'd feel a bit left out.

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How many you cunts smoke the ol' 'ipe?

>>74006034
Tried that for two years now and they still haven't fucked off.

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>>74005439
Turkic Afghans are cute af, shame about them being so religious

>>74006021
buy a tv licence

cc: Bruce, bcc: /brit/
it's not so bad once you get the hang of the alphabet. Typing is a pain too though. Try it
http://typeinthai.com/
(you might have to ctrl+ scroll to zoom out a bit)

Done a fat shit that's blocked the toilet and I don't have anything to unblock it with
I might have to manhandle my poo out of the way

>>74006055
laddos

>>74005624
Wish he'd have died

>>74006029
What sort of runt doesn't follow the football?

>>74006029
Don't care for working class sports tbqh.

>>74006075
coat hanger

>>74005929
CompSci/DataScience (bit of a mix desu) at a Russell Group

>>74005944
Trying senpai. Know it's dumb to feel this pathetic when nothing else is wrong but feel worse because of it.

babestation

can't believe it didn't occur to me until yesterday to get a popup blocker

checkmate, extratorrent

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The ol' 'ipes.

should i try tunnelbear for free

>>74006084
Lower middle class and above.

Lonely

Very lonely

And sad

And fucking up my masters degree too

Haha

Time for more antidepressants these will do the trick I'm sure

>>74006084
Ice Hockey > Football > Rugby tbqh

>>74005879
If you got a high 2:1 in 2nd year then you should get a 2:2 overall, right?

Master's or grad scheme lad, you'll be fine.

threesome with the lads

>>74006094
how do you browse without ublock origin

ah yes
*pays £70 for a matchday ticket*
football, or "association football"
*pays £50 for sky & BT sports*
truly the sport of the working class

>>74006112
Only good thing about antidepressants is that they stopped me wanking.

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Call this one Elizabeth, because she takes Virginias like a champ.

>>74006002
Have this fear myself 2bh
Reckon the moment they got over here and got citizenship they'd fuck off with a better looking bloke, no shortage of yellow fever here and white fever is rife amongst their sort

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>>74006144
>mfw have all the premium Sky channels for free
>never watch them

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>IMG_20170423_015730411.jpg

>>74006146
Nothing wrong with a wank

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His name is Brian, because he's built like a Brian.

>>74006151
Maybe we should go to their countries. Our money will be worth more there too.

confident there's less than 10 people in the world who remember i exist

>>74006144
>the working class get taken advantage of
wasn't aware of this

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I call this one Antonio, because he's dark like an Italian stallion.

>>74006144
You're right. Voting Corbyn now.

>>74006141
never heard of it until now

>>74006171
would demolish her gash

confident there's less than 10 people in the world and they just go around in elaborate disguises and the other 8 billion odd are just smoke and mirrors

>>74006175
Have had wank sessions which started on Friday evening and ended on Monday 4 a.m. tbqh

bit of a time waster

>>74006207
enjoy your mouth cancer

>>74006211
thats so weird to me, ive been using some type of adblocker since like 2009

>>74006075
I use a disposable little wooden kebab skewer. Get a plastic bag, disposable wooden kebab skewer and some bogroll.
Wrap the bag around your hand, use it like a glove to hold the skewer.
Use the skewer to slice up the poo.
Flush.
If the poo isn't going down, chop it up with the skewer some more.
Use the bogroll to wipe off the skewer and throw the bogroll in the bog.
Unwrap the bag from your hand so it goes around the skewer.
Note: You have not touched the poo or the skewer with either hand.
Wrap up the skewer in the bag.
Caution: The skewer may pierce the bag, protrude from it and get poo on anything it touches so be careful.
Put the skewer in the black wheelie bin.
Wash your hands well.

>>74006216
you mean you blue balled yourself

>>74006188
I imagine it would be harder to return home if things didnt work out then, wages are much lower there. How much does thailad make?

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Why do I do it to myself

Coming here every day, almost religiously. What do I hope to find here? Does the presence of people with an even worse prospect in life give me comfort? Is 4chan just a pseudo-hobby I use as an excuse to not have to go out and mingle with people?

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>>74005879
>year 1, 2 , 3
>doss about
>end with a high 1st

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>>74006219
Nothing fun is without risk. All things in moderation.

>>74006249
No la I've had a few dozen orgasms along the way but just kept going. Paced myself obviously and had some breaks for eating and naps.

>>74006251
Mate you could scrape together a plane ticket to Australia after a month of teaching English.

Just did a poo at work with the cubicle door unlocked throughout

life on the edge

>The leader of the Women's Equality Party, Sophie Walker, is to stand against Tory MP and male rights advocate Philip Davies in the election.

ah yes, nothing can stop a Labour-Women's Equality Party coalition government now

>>74006229
i use adblocker pro, apparently it doesn't do popups

DUDE THATS MY SISTER.

Get off of him.

I was so pissed. I lost all patients with him and he was no longer a friend.

>>74006267
Where and what degree?

have bummed a lad but have never been bummed by a lad

am I gay?

>patients

>>74006277
each orgasm is the end of a wank

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My 'baccos.

remember that guy who turned down sex because his floor was dirty

mum always told me to be patient

>>74006329
He said wank session you fucking spastic not one wank that lasted all weekend.

Stupid cunt.

http://www.strawpoll.me/12815720
http://www.strawpoll.me/12815720
http://www.strawpoll.me/12815720

come one, come all

>>74006358
just using me fables

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Mummy and I unironically moving out of our rented house to live on a Canal boat.

Mummy says I can have it for myself and live with the gf on it as long as I look after it, although I'm going to uni soon anyway

Going to have full electric + water, and a decent internet. Going to sell everything and live minimal like, only going to take my PC and guitar with me

See you on the high seas, lads

>>74006329
untrue

it's just a few spasms and I continue wanking throughout

and after the first five or six they're mostly dry until a longer break

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>>74006345

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Ignition.

>canal boat on the sea

shall I tell him or

>>74006383
very very runty

>>74006384
enjoy your prostate cancer

>>74006075
Flush the toilet and as you do so pour a bucket of water down it, works a treat

You might have to get your mummy to help you though, it's a two man job

>>74006383
Good luck la, it's hellish in the middle of winter.

>>74006383
bet winter will be grim as fuck

>>74006281
Yeah that's not my worry though, it's long-term savings. If I lived there for 10 years, married, divorced, decide to come back, how much would I realistically have on an average income? Guarantee after conversion I'd have far, far, far more if I'd just stayed here, probably in only a fraction of the time too.

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Ignitio.

business idea: instead of a canal boat, an anal boat

haven't hammered out the specifics yet

So annoyed at how my game of Arma 2 just went. 20+ minutes progress in a mission and then it glitches and gets me killed. Tried again, 10 minutes later, it glitches and makes the mission impossible to do. Fucking rage quit. Will not be playing that game again for a long time.

>>74006444
*opens your sluice*

>>74006418
>>74006423

Got central heating and insulation, it'll be cold as fuck when waking up for sure but should heat up once I start running it.

Chances are I'll just be up Uni most of the winter anyways, which is near the sea also so hellish weather either way

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the gf

>>74006383
in other words, can't pay they'll take it away

business idea: buy high sell low

>>74006443
You like your pipes, don't you mate?

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Stick it up the stem.

*surreptitiously googles sluice*

>>74006445
Still reeee'ing that they completely fucked up multiplayer in ArmA2 and haven't bothered fixing it

>>74006472
i have the same phone except mine is green

i unironically fucking love science

how do i get a slag gf

>>74006504
runt

>be 6'6" with very wide shoulders
>tfw will never be a petite qt trap

I unironically watch The Big Bang Theory

giganormie, fit housemate has just got a gf but she's kinda short and not as pretty as my gf

take that, gymrunts

>>74006542
could spark you out in one hit you fucking ogre

>>74006545
I watch it to get to sleep
v. good white noise, requires no thinking

why don't you all have jobs??

>>74006545
it's not that bad imo, i just pretend to hate it because 4chan says i should

>>74006551
But she loves him more and doesn't sleep around like your gf does.

>>74006478
"Like" is not the right word. I don't know what the right word is, but it's more subtle and spicy.

>>74006438
You would earn more there, of course. Also visa/work permits are a pain. There's definite pros and cons as with anything.

>>74006559
>working on a monday

hello working class runt

>>>/ck/8824207
comfy thread

>>74006559
whacked everything into an index fund

>>74006504
I haven't even tried muliplayer yet. Only bought it two days ago. Trying to do all the single player stuff first so I don't make a massive tool of myself in multiplayer, but boot camp pissed me off. The scenarios pissed me off. And I just quit the campaign because the first mission pissed me off.

There's five quid I won't see again.

>>74006559
I do but my boss is on holiday and no one else cares if I'm at the office.

Might stroll in around four for a meeting.

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>>74006594
did you see my post?

NEED a manfaced gf

>>74006604
Are you on OA or the base game? OA multiplayer works fine, once GameSpy shut down the base game was fucked. They at least implemented a replacement system for OA, I think they use Steam now

Someone post the squinty asian eyes football fan pic please?

How do people who sleep together in one bed deal with farts?

>>74006624
Immediately scrolled past, as well as the replies

>>74006551
guys like that date girls lesser in attractiveness than them because it makes the girl whipped and not the guy.

>>74006570
it's the opposite since they're both runts who go clubbing and shag a different person every weekend, whereas the gf and I are pure and true.

>>74006559

been applying but no experience REEEEEEEEEEEEE

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me vs the world

(anon contra mundus)

australian chink on an absolute spergout in another thread lads

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business idea:

Who /mu/ here?

Rate "skylines" by Glades

>>74006637

prefer not to say

>>74006627
you're in luck ... your country is full of them

>>74006673
Add a couple more in the middle, in austria and in bavaria for good measure

>>74006637
just let 'em rip and compare aromas, etc.

>>74006637
Buttplug.

>>74006663
link

>>74006604

Just join a group that's friendly to newcomers and have them teach you. You'll have to learn shitloads with mods anyway, I came from a Dayz background and play with some nice lads now, as long as you know how to shoot and run around youll be fine

You can join if you like, only if you have arma 3 + apex tho. Otherwise just look for an arma group on ///reddit//// or something

>>74006663
link

>>74006695
How do you figure?

>>74006661
Reckon these people regret this shit years later or do they double down and keep going

>>74006663
which thread

>>74006630
I'm on the base game atm but I got the complete collection on sale on Steam.

I like the simulation aspect, the command stuff and the vehicles. But then it tries to be CoD: Modern Warfare in the first campaign mission and fails miserably. Not sure I can stomach any more of it.

>>74006714
you're always complaining women in ethiopia are ugly

>>74006707
>>74006709
>>74006716
>>74004892

little tip for you lads: before entering a stressful social situation, have a quick swig of brandy or scotch

it makes everyone really like you

>>74006745
No, I'm not lmao.

But I admit to the aesthetic superiority of Mediterranean women

>>74006729
mm.. I didn't do SP on the base game, jumped straight into multiplayer myself. There's a gamemode you can do where it's PvE, everyone working together to take over random objectives around the map which is good for learning. OA and ArmA3 have them I think, can't remember the name

>>74006747
Because China is a gigantic slum, and the US has cultural output.

>>74006765
But I vomit when I drink that

extremely funny random post
>>>/ck/8851406

>>74006799
idgi

>>74006799
hate how yanks call gherkins "pickles"

there are many types of pickles, yanks.

Has some bizarre dreams lads. Some of them were scary as well. Recommend you all keep a dream journal like me, felt like a good couple hours of fun dreams.

>>74006799
/tv/ says i'm not allowed to like that

>>74006729

NOBODY plays the single player lad, just play the dayz game variant, epoch or some other shit

>>74006815
t. the same country that uses the yank term for capsicums
You're not one to judge lad

>>74006787
oh nut up you fucking bender

business idea: take my antidepressants to placate the doctors and parents, but keep "accidentallly" taking them with grapefruit to neutralise the effect

>>74006817

dreamt there was a spider on my wall, woke up and freaked the fuck out. jumped over the gf as she woke up onto the floor, she shit herself and got scared. looked for the spider and it was all just in my dream, she was fuming haha x

>>74006856

> taking them with grapefruit to neutralise the effect

Ahh yes, the power of so-called "super foods"

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JUST

>>74006856
describe medicated you vs unmedicated you

Why the hell didn't dayZ or any of its variants ever come to console lads?

>>74006779
>>74006824
Cheers, I'll give it another go on multi then.

>>74006863
Had this but with a snake in the room, I freaked out and the gf took the piss for about a week.

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>>74006697
Voilà

>>74006824
DayZ ruined ArmA2
fuck off fuck off fuck off fuck OFF
arooooooooooooooooo

>>74006912
World peace has been achieved

>>74006844
>capsicums
hootING

fuck off you stupid microbe

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>gf gf gf gf gf gf gf
It's midday on a Monday please stop

asked for a nice bottle of scotch for my 21st birthday

>>74006919

arma is still alive and well. if it werent for dayz i wouldnt have played arma, although i did play OFP previously, so I can't complain

it's good to teach the basics too, just cause the community is bad doesn't mean the lad can't use it to learn x

haha cum

>>74006956
>>74006956

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>>74006978

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nice keyboard smash