/brit/

>>73610215
4 handles? wierd

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the waifu from my other lifu

>>73610289
i was just referring to on a recreational night out you spacker

Colonised an entire continent on the other side of the planet so that one day they would grow up to make /brit/ threads for us

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*sucks your willy*

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I can see my keyboard just fine. Friendly reminder that if you can't double shift then you're a handlet.

>>73610308
>remeber your most cringe moment

>>73610306
Don't reply to me unless you've got something worthwhile to say. (You don't)

>>73610316
hello marfans

>>73610316
was your mother a duck?

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>>73610326
alrigh'

>>73610308
bucks is that you

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another angle of my AR, what would you name it?

and how'd that guy know i was the commieposter, do I have a reputation already? hmmm

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>>73610309
OI!!! JANNY!!!

>>73610316
Your keyboard is fucked mate, get ahold of yourself

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>>73610316

>>73610316
your mum gives a good double shift

>>73610342
no

*gets ahold of self*

>>73610340
You've got creepy fuckin hands

>>73610356
hey that's my image I didn't give you permission to save it

>>73610345
i would name it "ar 15" for "assault rifle 15"

>>73610361
nevermind then

>>73610373
AR is for armalite as in "me little armalite kills ulsters"

lied to get out of a party again

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>>73610340
>>73610356

Stop posting spooky hands

>>73610356
>double shifting on a fucking LAPTOP keyboard

l m a o

>>73609393
>>73609582 (You)
>>73609393
>>73609582 (You)
>>73609393
>>73609582 (You)

>>73610385
hey mate,

what kind of dog is this?

cheers,

Dave

"Shart Attack" featuring Neil Pooshatton

Like to pretend my autism is an irl gimmick and I could be normal if i chose to

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Things Britons will never understand:

>saying funny things in a British accent
>having no school on Good Friday
>Easter Egg hunts
>Halloween
>leaving milk and cookies for Santa Claus
>dumping your milk in cookies
>a proper meatloaf
>seeing which one of your mates can do the best British accent
>local microbrewed beer from a master brewer
>eating fine Italian food from an Italian family
>having a properly cooked pizza
>chocolate milk
>eating at KFC
>owning guns and weapons
>driving on the not-left side of the road
>pick up trucks
>monster trucks
>seeing cows in the pasture
>driving long distances

fourth poster below this is a runtoid

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>>73610406
STOP!!!

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Fuck that kills after a while

>>73610383
properly autistic propaganda

went to the rugby last week and got depressed seeing all the qt uni girls

>>73610422
One thing we don't have here that I would like to try is 'pumpkin pie'.

Always looks nice in TV shows and movies.

>dumping your milk in cookies
ah yes

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>>73610406
mate

>>73610437
runtoid

>>73610429
Wow you've got long toes

Apple music has been giving me pretty shit recommendations recently

>>73610429
what the hell is wrong with your thumb?

>>73610422
have done quite a few of these things

>>73610429
Can tell by your hands that you have phimosis

>>73610448
it's pretty fuckin good yea

>>73610462
It's perspective mate

>>73610429
hahahahaha the fuck is your thumb

>>73610458
yeah ama

>>73610448
It's not like normal pie. The texture is almost pudding like

>>73610476
something someone with a fucked thumb would say

>>73610476
yeah sure

you're just an insecure thumblet

>>73610473
Literally everyone on 4chan has phimosis. Probably fordyce spots too.

Pumpkins are a shit tier vegetable.

>australia is anglo

literally all my mates are either at least 50% Italian or 100% Italian. My unrelated uncle and aunt are both 100% Italian as well which means my cousins are only 50% anglo.

>>73610492
I don't (I do)

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>fordyce spots
guilty

>>73610473
how so oh wise spaniard

re. post #73610422

The following are low quality bait design to trigger a (You) from Brits
>having no school on Good Friday
>Easter Egg hunts
>Halloween
>local microbrewed beer from a master brewer
>eating fine Italian food from an Italian family
>having a properly cooked pizza
>seeing cows in the pasture

Note: Italian-american food is literally shit-tier
Note: Brtis leave out sherry, mince pies and carrots for santa & his reindeer
Note: Whilst Brits to experience this, it is a shitty yank import and should be eradicated rom the UK

>>73610496
Eeeeeeeyyy whensa YOUR Dolmio day amichi!?!? Heheyyy! Wahey! Pasta de la pizza!

>>73610493
that's true, because they're fruit

>>73610496
I suggest getting new mates

>>73610422
I remember attempting to stay up all night to catch Santa dropping down the chimney but always fell asleep too early.

What a literal retard I am.

>>73610496
why didn't we get any italians

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cara 2bh lads

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MUMMY SAYS MY THUMB IS JUST FINE

i have fordyce spots but not runtmosis

>>73610496
bet you're from melbourne

Go down to the kitchen, make a sandwich and coffee?

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>tfw fordyce spot
>will have to explain to my first partner (yes it will happen) that i dont have an STD

>>73610535
i am

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hey yall

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>yes it will happen

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need to poo

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>>73610496

>>73610539
I've got 2 white pearly penile papules right under my frenulum and fucking nowhere else on my dick. It looks 100% like an STD (but I know it's not because I have never seen a vagina).

Not particularly bothered because I will die a virgin.

>>73610506
>>having no school on Good Friday
Okay sure
>>Easter Egg hunts
Okay sure
>>Halloween
You don't celebrate Halloween
>>local microbrewed beer from a master brewer
You wouldn't understand.
>>having a properly cooked pizza
Chicago is the home of the Pizza
>>seeing cows in the pasture
Your mom on the toilet doesn't count

>>73610561
OI!!! lad will NOT be pleased

wish I didn't spend all my money on things I don't need and on things I do need

kinda makes you wonder how many trannies you've seen irl given how feminine these look

just'bou't'cook't'ol'con'n'gg'sarnie lads

>>73610561
OI!!!!! pack it in!!

>>73610564
>Not particularly bothered because I will die a virgin.
good lad

>>73610454
lad

>>73610571
but that's you

> yanks are so naive and uncultured they think having a local brewery is a new and crazy concept and call it "microbrews"

Really embarrassing

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Potential date coming up during the week. Will probably sabotage myself in some way

>>73610600
and i am NOT pleased one bit

>>73610578
Honestly I have never, EVER, seen a tranny picture online that my brain hasn't instantly recognised as a man. The brow, jaw, shoulders and hands give it away instantly.

Might be interesting in a few years when the kids who managed to get put on HRT before puberty hit grow up, they will probably be legit passable. But for now it's just mentally ill white men playing dress up before they inevitably kill themselves.

>>73610602

>atomic IPA: now with extra hops and bitterness

yanks digust me to my very core

>>73610429
u got a fat ugly thumb

>>73610629
why are they so OBSESSED with IPAs

baffling

do we call him phismo lad or thumb lad?

>>73610492
I have the ol sis and a 4inch penis lmao

My great friend, Kim, called me from Pyongyang. He informed me that the nuke testing was called off. Wise!

.

*virgin walks into the thread*

Alri?

>>73610612
yeah you probably will

good luck x

more like Pingpong haha

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>austhumblets

>>73610602
>>73610629
>>73610637
Hey, it's not our fault your drinking culture is dominated by a few old beer dynasties who rule the pubs. We're a land of artists and creators, including our always fresh, always smooth microbreers

Business idea: start cheap, low-quality breweries in the USA with 'manly' names such as Engine Oil or Devil's Blood to sell to insecure yanklets driving huge pickup trucks around their cities.

>>73610637
personally i'm obsessed with belgian ales specifically flanders reds and other sours

they're also expensive as fuck here

bought myself a multipack of coca cola (now 45% less sugar and calories)

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20 year old with the prozzie sister who literally already fucked his entire life up here

the mum's friend said her friend, who is an owner of a popular bar / restaurant not far from my house, would hire me if I ask him for a job.

called the bar like an hour ago and got one of the runt employees to leave a message for the bossman, so the employee did and told me to call back after the long weekend.

nepotism ftw!

Glad Rebel Media picked up Tommy
https://youtu.be/dE4Q8c_Pm5c

>>73610681
Fucking bender

Just drink a normal beer, would bottle you if you came into my boozer asking for autism drinks

>>73610690
are you the one with the fucked up thumb hahahahahaha

>>73610690
my dad just got me a job at his company making like 29/hr

it's not a ton but nepotism does rule

>>73610704

haha nah that's not me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyONbqggasY

>>73610698
i would dodge the bottle and punch you in the gut and then throw rocks at all of your coolers haha

>>73610716
why is he rapping into headphones?

I got some big things for you don't worry about your night
I might just risk it for you don't worry about your life
I might just rescue you and imma treat you right
I want the best of you don't worry about tonight

>>73610711
I've become completely disillusioned with America in these past two years.

playing overwatch
dont see myself getting up to much else today

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the anal fissure's playing up again lads

>>73610762
why's that

>>73610711

wow nice, i don't expect much money, i'll just be happy to have a job without going through the whole depressing application & interview bullcr*p to be honest.

the mum's friend said she was making $400 in tips working the bar on weekends but I don't really wanna work the bar because I have basically no social skills after 2 or 3 years as a shut in neet :^)

>>73610773
You tried the new uprising

>>73610711
you're the Jewish one, right?

Punch you in your face mate

>>73610787

I also wouldn't make that much working the bar anyway, since I am NOT a female.

>>73610791
no religion is gay lol

>>73610663

cheers la x

anyone want to see the hot stinking mess i just made in the toilet bowl?

grew out of videogames when i was 17

>>73610805
I'd give you a tip ;)
only the tip mind you haha

rock you in the face stab ur brain with ur nosebone

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HATE the left

having a lunchable

>>73610820
Yup. Go ahead and show it to us.

>>73610820
yes please x

>Saturday night
>house to myself
>plenty of spare cash
>don't go out because I don't actually want to talk to people
>watch a movie and post on /brit/ while I get my dinner ready

ah yes

>>73610847
good lad

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-39594852
>Learner drivers will have to be able to follow directions from a sat nav and drive into a parking space to pass their test.

>Ministers have announced four changes to the current test which will come into force on 4 December.

>Drivers will also be expected to answer vehicle safety questions while on the move and complete 20 minutes of independent driving rather than 10.

>The RAC Foundation said it would be a "far more realistic assessment".

Anyone learning to drive? Might want to wait until next year to take your test, they're making it easier

>>73610847
go buy some ketamin young man

>>73610822

but why? video games are fun unless you're a full blown addict who can't control himself.

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>HATE the left

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how'd i do lads?

>>73610865
ah yes the gun posting numale leftist is here

>>73610831
i wish new york was still like the 90s
i went there last year. still cool city but its full of fucking hipster who dont sound new yorker

>>73610880
Sorry, I have Autism

>>73610886
new york is the proof that gentrification is a bad thing

>>73610886
I want to visit Texas. New York sounds like shite however.

>>73610886

k? how is that relevant to his post at ALL? god i hate russians

wanted to get a lot done today but the shower is broken ree etc.

>>73610789
yeah not that great

>>73610832
those young lads were better dressed than most Irish lads my age

house all to meself for the next week

party time!

jk i don't have any friends haha

>>73610875

bit rapey t b h

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>ah yes the gun posting numale leftist is here

>>73610900
Why Texas

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>>73610922
>>73610865
you tell him comrade!

no one even knows im back in france hahahha

>>73610922
fat gun numale

>>73610916

I`ll come m8. I have next week off work

>>73610929
We know, which means GCHQ knows, which means (((they))) know

You're done mon frere

>>73610912

how does that stop you from getting a lot done today? i go days without showering at a time and it's never stopped me from reaching my full potential on the daily.

/tv/ is such a shit board

just nonstop memes

>>73610929
France sucks.

>it's only 09:30

fuck shouldn't have got up so early

>>73610925
Barbecue and monster trucks and all that. Seems to be the most "American" part of America.

having homemade pizza for dinner btw

store bought pizza bases & tomato paste of course

>>73610941
can't imagine starting the day without a shower, still half asleep until I get washed

>>73610929
So there's zero people who know you're in France?

That's a coincidence. There's zero fucks in my mind

>>73610947
true hahahahahah

>>73610955
Yeah and Belfast is the most Irish part of Ireland

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Just came back from my date with the date with the paki girl, was great and she sucked my willy

>>73610519
this 2bh

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>hello
>i regularly post pictures of my gun collection in a cringe worthy fashion

>>73610911
its a lyric from one of the most new york songs ever

>>73610969
bit gay

>>73610948

to wake up at 9:30am is late as fuck, the sun DOES rise at 6am you know...

>>73610969
good result

>>73610955
I live here. BBQ taste the same everywhere, and maybe 1/100,000 people actually watch monster trucks.

>>73610983
This Twitter is satire you spastic

>>73610976

you replied too late, i don't care anymore.

consider your post: not read.

>>73610956
make your own base and sauce next time and I might, MIGHT give you the time of day

garuntee the coffee i just had was better than anyone elses here this morning.

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>>73610993
https://youtu.be/M3Dt4dNDHeA

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>>73610968

always get a laugh out of stupid foreigners thinking they're gonna get the "American experience" by visiting some flyover

>>73610963
i told everyone that wanted to know that i'd get back from sweden today but my flight was actually yesterday morning you dig

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJ1eZqenaDw

Communist poster type people video

anyone else shiver when an american starts a post with "ah yes"

>>73610955
Better start learning some spanish

>>73611030
She's hot tbw

>>73610993
Your life is satire you spastic

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>>73611015
always get a laugh out of stupid, may as well be foreigners, democrat Californians or East coasters who think they're special

Give it up

cali and new york are the best place in the US rest is anecdotic really

kalindra chan?

>>73610861
>even coming close to failing your driving test
It's obscenely easy anyway, I only got one minor.

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>don't go near my sister yeah Floyd

>>73611052
>This

americans dont have passports hahahahahahahaha

the always angry american phone poster

lads my coffee was better than yours. i had it with toast and the toast was also good. but the coffee was really the main event. if only you knew

>>73611083
was it 'pressed?

>>73611030
>>73611001
This channel is also satire

Are you pretending you don't realize this on purpose?

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Tell me your worst case of being bullied story.

>>73611098
I was the bully though

>>73611030
what the hell happens to yanks in university

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>>73611052
California sucks

>>73611095
I know it's satire, it's just funny. Only begun the meme war has.

Lets not pretend the reality isn't much different:
https://youtu.be/fbkKDrXF1GU#t=546

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Need a paki titqueen gf

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>>73611052
gladly live in somewhere like montana or wyoming over both of them

>>73611117
Hahaha I smell envy here.

>>73611117
>the only thing I know of my home country is the food
lmao

>>73611128
nah that would be boring

have little to no interest in america and find it a bit weird when I come across people who are interested in it

Can hear the cows down the road lads
p comfy

>>73611127
That's not a paki that's an Arab.

>>73611117
1950s California is the GOAT

>>73611121
Guy holding the camera sounds like a fat milquetoast socks with sandals type

Three cities you have to see before you die.

For me: Vienna, Budapest, Istanbul.

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>>73611152
No it's not, fuck off

>>73611147
I live in a city all I can hear are engines and tires.

>>73611152
Fuck is the difference>>73611128

Coral Springs, Washington D.C., Austin

>>73611117
Really hate how yanks love classifying everyone by colour.

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>>73611131
>envy
>California

This is what is a 10/10 in California

>>73611161
He's just a reporter, get a load of the antifa "army"

>>73611089
Freshly roasted beans bought very locally, an expert espresso blend. Double shot of espresso poured from a manual espresso machine. The absolute pecise level of fineness in the grind to match the 15 KG pressure of the tamp, poured bang on the reccomended 9 bars of pressure. Extracted with maximum crema, with two parts steamed milk and minimal froth

>>73611169
post 'stagram

>>73611169
She's too hot and too light to be a paki. She's Iranian.

>>73611174
Fuck meant to reply to the Irish poster too

>>73611128
You realize there are literally two escalators in the entire state of Wyoming right

>>73611174
Arabs are generally lighter skinned

>>73611184
If you didn't aeropress it I don't care

>>73610938
alri i'll pick you up from the airport x

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>>73611189
She's a paki

>>73611186
She doesn't have one, she had a twitter but she closed it.

>>73611164
La Ronda, San Gimignano, Rome

>>73611192
nah depends really
in the levant maybe but afgan, gulf, north african etc are hardly lighter skinned

>>73611207
probably been honour killed by now

>>73611200
I have an aeropress. I use it to take to work and away on trips. It makes a decent filter coffee but it's not even in the same league, not even on the same board, not even the same fucking SPORT mate. A plebs game. Could be operated by a common sparrow.

>>73611164
Loughborough, Stoke-on-Trent, Skegness.

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>>73611191
So

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>>73611219
Most pakis I know in England are darker skinned than arabs

>>73611207
Keep posting her

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irl karen has visited london

>>73611207
I need to slide my meatstick into her frontbutt because she's T H I C C

>>73611236
So you'd be there for like 4 hours before realizing you've made a huge mistake

There's a reason only like 600,000 people live there

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>>73611221
Don't say that ffs

>OMG OREOS LOL

We've been eating biscuits for fucking ages then shit yank biscuits come along and they're everywhere now I don't understand.

>>73611256
yeah they're mentally weak extroverted runts

>>73611266
You're disgusting and called them "digestives" though

Bad marketing

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>>73611251
>>73611242

>>73611266
Stop being such a nationalist retard. Yanks have some good biscuits. Oreos and milk ARE ORGASMIC.

>>73611207
https://twitter.com/sunchilld?lang=en

>>73611266
advertising
they're not that good

>>73611256
600,000 is a ton of people

>>73611266
they dnt even taste good

>>73611278
digestives are a type of biscuit you absolute dibber

>>73611266
Oreos have been in the UK for about 20 years, nothing new.

>>73611266
The big Yankee dollar shall conquer everything, wait until chippies all get replaced with "Monarch and Chaps fish and chips (headquaters houston texas)" franchise

>>73611278
Digestives are just a kind of biscuits mate, we have millions of types
>>73611281
They're like a really shit chocolate bourbon.

Tesco value chocolate bourbons taste nicer than oreos.

My dream would to be to live in some comfytown in the US
too bad its near impossible to move to the US from Europe. Meanwhile mexicans make a game of crossing the border and indians get visas like theres no tomorrow

>>73611266
Fox's are the best biscuits

>>73611256
>There's a reason only like 600,000 people live there
Probably because it's on a vast plains surrounded by woods and mountains, with the largest mammalian life outside of Africa

It's a unique place on the world and maybe he likes it better than the concrete jungle

He's a Celt, so you know they dream about the happy-hunting grounds and endless deer abounding

gingernuts
jafa cakes
tim tams
#elite

>>73611297
In the past two years they have exploded in popularity.

>>73611282
That's not her, just some weirdo reposting her photos

just took the mum & sister's pizza out of the oven and like 10% of the toppings slid off haha

will be MUCH more careful when taking my OWN pizza out of the oven.

>spread my ankle
>pay 20k at the hospital
ah yes, america

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>He's a Celt, so you know they dream about the happy-hunting grounds and endless deer abounding

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absolutely gagging for some linguini with clams, but getting clams involves leaving the house so I shan't be doing that

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White women love Islam

>>73611287
It's 3 times as big as Ireland

>>73611326
i don't know what tim tams are and you forgot hobnobs u donut haha

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>>73611344

>>73611336
Not really, they just started releasing more flavours recently so sales are bound to increase.

>>73611337
You are the weirdo

>>73611360
but theyre pinoys

>>73611363
I'll hobnob your donut if you ever reply to me again

bender

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the corner shop

>>73611344
Butter or margarine?

shant be replying to new zealand ever again. cant believe the level of rude

>>73611364
swear this shit shouldnt be allowed

Why do Brexitmongs think our shitskin problem has anything to do with the EU?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SFjfbL1KWNI

I love that every single white Pole or Lithuanian that would have moved here to do a job that British workers don't want to do will be replaced with a Pakistani or Nigerian immigrant from the commonwealth.

>>73611344
How do you spread an ankle?

>>73611336
Only cos they're part-owned by Kraft, which owns Cadbury now. They've increased marketing for Oreos so naturally sales have increased.

>>73611363
>donut

FOY

>>73611360
they like the westernised version, the cosmetic, exotic islam-lite. Wouldn't like it so much in the full version.

>>73611382
bucks is that thou

>>73611406
Muh conspiracy

>>73611363
Tim tams are an improved version of the penguin

>>73611401
t.Eastern Euro

>>73611411
righto, THAT'S IT

*unzips*

>>73611401
meanwhile
>Brussels tells Poland & Hungary to 'accept more migrants or LEAVE the bloc'

Could go for a chippy and a curry shop in my town desu

Mint Slices

>>73611117
>white people
>they've
>their
>they've

ah yes he will not devide us

>>73611425
facts

>>73611444
>>73611444
>>73611444
>>73611444

>>73611431
is this bucks or some new zealand i dont care about

>>73611433
the pakis and indians, like our arabs and blacks, are self inflicted wounds
this is different, but you did dodge that bullet with brexit

People who call the Chippy a "Chipper" need to be gassed on the spot

Itsa me!

>>73610422
I leave out whiskey and steak & kidney pies for father christmas.

>>73611360
what the FUCK is wrong with their faces lmao

>>73611326
fatty

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Powers that be take note: suffering is the aperitif for destruction.

>>73610691
>look at ya... y'nonces

haha