/brit/

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cara

stacey dooley

>>73383208
this 2bh

don't like the hair

feels nice and still

good thing about brown is it always will

>>73383187
why no edition you fucking mong
hope janny sages this thread desu

>>73383235
>le edition xDDD

fuck off 'dit

'The Big Lebowski' was such a bad film that it genuinely took me a few days to watch

Kept telling myself it eventually would get better but it was pure shit throughout the entire thing. Sad! So many other cases.

need a dyed grey hair gf

lads do we bald more than yanks?

www.reddit.com/r/tgirls

cars should only be used for racing and driving to the countryside
they destroy the spirit of man when used to commute

>>73383208
J U S T
U
S
T

>>73383172
I didn't mention my phone you absolute womble

>>73383207
Do you have Raising Cane's?

>>73383253
>editions are reddit
fuck off lad, not having it

>>73383271
but how will I get to work

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Nothin' like lettin' the ol' flaps out in the breeze

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cara

cant believe you cunts get so worked up about OPs and editions
like anyone cares after the first 10 posts

went to the pub with some lads from work and this lad bought a fucking kopparberg instead of a pint

what an absolute bender

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Reminder that if you are one of the many posters who posts links ITT, you should remember that I don't open a single one of them. Youtube, BBC, Twitter, DailyMail, vocaroo, anything; I do not click a single one. All that time you spend highlighting the link, copying and pasting it, filling out the CAPTCHA and sitting eagerly waiting for relevant (You)s relating to the content on the other side of the link are completely and utterly wasted on me because I do not, ever, open links ITT.

>>73383300
just cycle mate :)

I'm high like tuscon
I'm smoking on too strong

>>73383300
walk, bike, bus or train

cunt

suck ya mum

>>73383254
Greater London

might do watch anime

>>73383289
dont think yanks dont understand food here is shit we have very few chains

God isn't real, Morty.

>>73383300
WHOA, SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE'S WORKING FOR THEIR CAR
SIMPLIFY, MAAN

>Paying money to go to a gym

Just do prisoners workouts. Do sit ups, push ups and lift heavy shit all day, it's not hard and you'll get better results.

>>73383300
walking is the ideal way

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>>73383187
I'm a nationalist but I hate British people.

>>73383328
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veAIHDGghP4

Still fuming that my Paulaner glasses arrived broken lads. Ordered another set for tomorrow these better not be the same.

>>73383371
Why do all lower class Brits look exactly the same?

>>73383329
nah

>>73383334
my work is literally an 8 min walk away and I still drive :^)

got stage iv non-small lung cancer (adenocarcinoma), primary tumour is on the periphery of my lower right lung, mets to spine and brain lads

ama

let me just get up hours earlier to take 40 different busses to work
instead of a 40 minute car ride
sounds like a great plan

>>73383324
kopparberg is good you wanker

>oh, and did i mention trump has stock in raytheon ?

rich people buy stocks in a lot of different things. It's not a conspiracy to think a millionaire would have stocks in an aeronautical company

>>73383420
if your job is 40 minutes away you'd get a train you thick fuck

>>73383312
like this hair more that the other hair

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>I'm a nationalist

>>73383367

This is true. Except I got some dumbells too.

Amount of retards I see going gym, doing fuck all reps and feeling their arms every five minutes is embarrassing.

>>73383419
prove it

it's also very poorly differentiated and highly malignant

fucking hate my neighbour lads
>fat middle aged stereotypical (read: normalfag) mum
>old nag stands outside to have phone calls at night
>the whole area can hear her shit conversations about normie things
>keeps people awake on the regular
>filed a noise complaint with the council because of next door's drumming and blamed me for it
>ree'd at me for putting firecrackers down to kill ants because it's working her dog up
other neighbours are totally fine, just this cunt that I have issues with

what's so wrong with globalism?

>>73383428
kopparberg is a fanny drink for women you absolute woofter

>>73383428
way too sweet and the alcohol content is too low to compensate for it

I don't understand why whites are often so nice to me

If I was white I wouldn't ever talk to a paki

>>73383447
right, let me get the train and 30 busses and still have it take well over twice as long

A 911 turbo with a deano with sunglasses pulled out in front of me earlier

>>73383445
>trump, billionaire, became president to enrich himself
possibly the worst take of them all

>>73383417
>my work is literally an 8 min walk away and I still drive :^)
you are the reason why the planet is dying

>>73383367
this

>>73383462
>going gym
only runts speak like this

Any Anarcho-socio-communists in?

>>73383485
wants to homogenize all cultures so it's easier to sell products. this is done under the guise of "diversity" when in reality it will have the opposite effect

>I have hundreds of pictures of people in fedoras on my computer yet have the audacity to judge other people

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>>73383414
say that to my face dickead

>>73383428
>sugar and red with a splash of alcohol

no

>>73383482
>putting firecrackers down to kill ants
what

>>73383494
probably just stupid lefties

When I was in Cub Scouts they made us learn how an internal combustion engine works. I didn't know why, and I didn't understand any of it because I was 8.

My dad sat me down and made me look at a complex picture of an engine and he was getting mad that I didn't understand what was going on. I started crying because I thought they would kick me out if I didn't know and I didn't understand why they were making us do this.

>>73383519
alri

>>73383519
wtf is a socio communist

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>>I have hundreds of pictures of people in fedoras on my computer yet have the audacity to judge other people

>>73383512
>pissing rain freezing cold
>walking to work
nah

also I can't shit in work so sometimes I drive home

>>73383328

Nice blog.

Subscribed

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love a good walk me

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>>I have hundreds of pictures of people in fedoras on my computer yet have the audacity to judge other people

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just bought this

>>73383543
when i was in scouts the adults forced me to do adult things too

>audacity

>>73383565
looks like a comfy neighbourhood

if you have a car and it isn't electric/hybrid then you're not human sorry

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Anyone ever had surgery to deal with ingrown toenails?

>>73383538
it was my thinly veiled excuse to blow an ants nest up to see what would happen
>>73383587
>£23 for a pair of pants
why do normies do this?

>>73383565
Can't see the snakes.

Howling and screeching at how easy it is to trigger 'dora posters and get indirect (You)s. Dancing puppets and I am the puppetmaster

Can't believe this bollocks lads
I was trying to engage in some ethnic banter with my Pakistani (not that I have a problem with that, by the way) colleague and HR get on my case about some 'racism' shite.

>>73383565
looks very comfy

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>>73383487
>>73383488
>>73383527
nowt wrong with kopparberg stop being cunts

>>73383604
I can't afford one

Also top gear soon

My life has no meaning. Wish I was alive during a World War so I could at least trick myself into thinking dying in it would give my life meaning.

>>73383560
love rain desu, comfy as fuck

>>73383630
didn't ask, don't care about your story

>>73383502

>30 busses

Imagine the logic of buying a car being so fragile you have to bullshit the fuck out of the alternatives.

>>73383419
whats the prognosis

>>73383653
become a jihadist

>>73383645
fuck off you absolute woman

>>73383658
not at 7 in the morning in the dark

>>73383600
>>73383633
yeah one of my favourite nearby streets

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>>73383485
Because it wants to revert everyone to the lowest common denominator

In a globalist society, the winners have been predetermined by the way. So have be losers. 99.999999% are the losers

>>73383645
post this frog again and I'll atomise your jawbone you kopparberg sucking pond beetle

>>73383565
comfy
but if i was in aus I'd ensure no flora was higher than an inch way too many places for critters to hide

>>73383698
Umm wrong sweetie

>>73383674
it would ACTUALLY, i just looked it up either take 3 (three) busses and a train or 4 busses and take about 2,5 hours to get to my office with public transport as opposed to a 40~60 minute drive depending on traffic

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>My life has no meaning

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what programming language will get me the most gash?

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>>73383700
>making threats of violence over memes

>people who drink guinness and black

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>>73383698
>march for freedom of speech
>go back to jailing people for tweets and facebook posts the very next day

>>73383722
uuuuuuuuuuuuuh ronge agen sweaty

>>73383698
sounds like capitalism to me

globalism is the endgoal of capitalism

>>73383648
top gear isnt on today

Rare vid of me and the boiz
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbegNeiurvs

>>73383739

Cycle instead of some or all of the buses, it's what you cunts do all the time

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>>73383700
>post this frog again and I'll atomise your jawbone you kopparberg sucking pond beetle

>>73383772
communism is the one true saviour of humanity

lads there's something big round and white in the sky

>>73383747
not sure you're getting this meme, nippon
>>73383772
>endgoal
???

>>73383754
gash script

>>73383739
but you should take 5 hours out of your day and more money because some guy who can't drive on the internet is annoyed at himself

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>people dissing kopparberg

Drinking a bottle of the good stuff right now

what would happen if you jumped out of a plane over the sea on an inflated dinghy?

"globalism" isn't a thing, it's just a boogeyman capitalists and elites use to deflect from the issues they created

found my mates Reddit account
/r/socialism is the main one featured
Funny thing is he despises the lower classes for voting breggzit

>>73383826
death

>>73383812
It's my ass, I'm about to sit on your face

>4 day week

I suppose all you atheists won't be partaking in the long weekend because you don't believe in our Lord and saviour Jesus Christ.

>>73383820
queer

>>73383841
>posting shit bait
try harder mong

if you want to be a fucking ponce and drink your bent alcopop ciders then at least drink Rekorderlig

>>73383781
:(

why?

>>73383841
sounds maynestreeem as fuck, is he an es jay doubleyew?

>>73383868
It's literally true you red mong

>>73383820

Mixed fruits is the worst fucking flavour

Strawberry and lime is where it's at

If you want some gayboy cider drink old mout.

>>73383872
Still howling

usually order a gin and tonic tbqh

>>73383820
t.female

>>73383820
>mixed fruits

Good la'. Strawberry and lime tastes like arse.

>>73383872
genuinely what is the appeal of this
i've seen videos where blokes get their bollocks stomped on in high heels

>>73383872
howling

>>73383881
>criticise post saying brexit will endanger the lower classes
>red
???

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>>73383855
I'm looking forward to next Sunday

gonna be toadposting for dayzzz

>>73383879
>is he an es jay doubleyew?
Irritatingly so

Going to bin him

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the missus after a night out

>>73383900
for me, it's an old fashioned

is life a meme?

>>73383820
>4%

the mixed berry is 5.3% here
>only reason I even drink it

>>73383913

http://i.4cdn.org/gif/1490706577746.webm

>>73383698
Love these kind of photo ops especially when the public do it. I find it funny how people try to force poignant photos as if people will look back on them in the future and be impressed. Most of people just do things like this because they crave to be part of something bigger than themselves.
Like when every terrorist attack happens you get people saying meaningless one liners like "we will stand united" or you get people standing in a line on a bridge. Think beyond the photo and it's just people deciding to get together and stand not doing anything just waiting for a photographer to come along. It's really stupid when you think about it.

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why do rorkes think "red" is an insult? proud to be a red t b h

bouta make a trip to the local 'spoons lads

What shall I order?

>>73383930
Read my original post again, Christ alive

>>73383971
DO NOT click this lads

>>73383754
lisp

why do commie queers think "rorke" is an insult?

proud to be a rorke t b h

>>73383982
kopparberg strawberry and lime

>>73383981
I'm not a rorke
You're still a red mong

>>73383971
WEW lad

2nd only to the hydraulic press

>>73383565
why do brit streets have to look so depressing compared to other nations

My award to the worst pile of shit of all time goes to 2001: A Space Odyssey

>>73383999
rich people are only rich because of their exploitation of the poor
it's a catch 22 for the rich

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>rich people are only rich because of their exploitation of the poor

>>73384053
this

>inb4 plebs you wouldn't get it etc

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ah yes

>>73384045
genuinely dont know. just looks so fucking grim, shit and packed

for the grace for the might of our lord
for the home of the holy

What is Deano's favourite film?

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http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-39545256
Inspirational

>>73384045
The streets is a good music group.

I'm liking this Oasis too.

What else

...m8s?

What's the most reddit tier overrated film ever?

Deadpool i reckon

which part of india is the least smelly? genuine question

birdman is a masterpiece

>>73384090
>been a year already
deary me deary me

>>73384113
scarface

>>73384045
because that's a nice street in an upper middle class area
there's plenty of grim shit holes but I don't live there

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Fucking finally!

I've struck a deal with Megabus to have myself dragged behind one of their coaches bollock-first on a trip from Glasgow to Brussels.

If all goes to plan there'll be nothing left of my knackers apart from a thin, bloody strip running all the way down the major arterial roads of England, through the channel tunnel, over the French border and into Belgium.

It's going to cost me and I've had to sign an awful lot of paperwork freeing Megabus of any liability but it'll all be worth it once my sack is well and truly obliterated.

>>73384113
inbetweeners movie

>>73384118
edl man looks high test as fuck

>>73384113
an unopened anniversary box set of Citizen Kane

>>73384113
con air

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>>73384118
me when i see an anime nonce in /brit/

>>73384112
>((poor))
>haha, look at my deflection to focus on the jews, checkmate communists!

birmingham seems so fucking shit and grim

>>73384141
FUCK

posted the wrong one

>>73383678
not good

>>73383565
Its like something from a Tolkien book

Wish I was a normie.

Reminder to never call yourself "anti-" something. "Anti-immigration, anti-globalist etc"

It just makes you look like the antagonist. Create new phrases instead of calling yourself anti. "Pro right to self determination" or some shit like that

killed the last giant in dark souls 2 last night laddies

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSp7-uoOmzs

>gf not on the list

>>73384216
very orwellian rorke

>>73384118
Would obliterate her in a second
Would also like to obliterate her clunge

>>73383419
You'll be alright.

Quote me on that.

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>>73384141

>>73384233
>literally invented the term "rorke" to shame people against him into not speaking
>calling others orwellian
hmmmmm interesting development

>>73384216
>hiding your powerlevel
I got bored of that when I was 17. If someone asks, I'll tell them that I'm a fascist outright.

>>73384077
Who do you think created their wealth?

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why are our roads so much more narrow than yanks?

ICE
BABY

>>73384279
nothing orwellian about recognising rorkes, rorke

>>73384299
no space

>>73384299
we aren't porky cunts

>>73384216
ok

pro right to gulag fascists

>>73384299
Less cars per person
Less space
Not hard to figure it out mate

>>73384288
do you think zuckerberg created his wealth by exploiting the poor? the idea that the rich only become rich by exploiting people is outdated, though it was true until very recently
>>73384316
ah yes you don't understand what orwellian means ah yes very good x

>>73384254
thx m8

>>73384279
the best part about Rorke is that Rorke shames himself.

why don't fat people just eat less food?

britain has too many fucking people

fucking packed

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>>73384299
they have more room

better planning etc

would you rather live there or in a sleepy brit village though

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>orwellian
>kafkaesque

>>73384344
but americans drive more than us because things arent as packed together

>>73384299
our roads where setup hundreds of years ago

>>73384299
Weren't built with cars in mind. Yank roads were.

>>73384338
I sincerely hope you aren't actually a leftist in real life and are just pretending to actually hold these beliefs

>>73384299
That's not a normal road. There's parking spaces near the curb that isnt for driving on

But I've been to England, and the roads are smaller and more dangerous, desu. You people zip around like bees, but we float like butterflies

>>73383328
>filling out the CAPTCHA

WHY THE FUCK IS IT SUDDENLY SO COLD FUCK OFF

what exactly is this 'deep state' I keep hearing about anyway?

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>>73384345

Brit motorway drivers are mental

Or maybe we are too slow

>>73384414
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_traffic-related_death_rate

the UK has the 2nd safest roads in the world (discounting micro-countries that don't count)

>>73384426
>amerilard pays to shitpost
Did you remember to tip hiro too?

>>73384361
>do you think zuckerberg created his wealth by exploiting the poor?
not directly, but like all work under capitalism, it can be traced back to exploitation

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/may/17/facebook-trending-news-team-curators-toxic-work-environment

>>73383226
literally this

HI!
*tackleglomps u* x3
*notices bulge in ur pants*
oWo what's this???

I got no love but it's whatever

>>73384299
Worst thing about Britain is our tiny roads.
I hate how the majority of our roads have cars alongside each pavement and you can only fit one car down the actual road, so you end up having to half pull in to a gap you see and have another car coming towards you get through.

On the plus side our spacial awareness is ridiculously good I find compared to other countries. Yanks couldn't cope on our roads

>>73384514
thats my penis don't touch it please

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>you are the reason why the planet is dying

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having a bath

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>>73384345
huh wow this really made me think i'm a capitalist now

>>73384514
my buzz lightyear action figure

large swathes of Sydney are grim wastelands unfit for human life tbqh

>>73384501
cba to read that article but yeah i will concede that if you were to trace money in the economy back to it's origin it comes from a worker producing value, i thought we were only talking about directly but you are right x

>>73384514
OwO uwaaAahahAhahAH

>>73384553
lanky cunt

>>73384492
I noticed that you people zip around at 20-40 mph mostly. Americans usually drive around 60-90 MPH

>>73384553
>those quads
aha faggot

>>73384471
definition of not an argument

>>73384553
Howling

>>73384456
(((deep state))) unironically

>>73384593
depends on the road obviously

>>73384559
my year 2 teacher had a fat go at me cuz my buzz lightyear figure started making noise in my drawer during class

>>73384553
don't mind slim legs but lads with skinny legs wearing skinny jeans make me feel ill

Best bollockpost I laid down was the one right after the Nice attack. Got some mad ting (You)s for it:

https://desuarchive.org/int/thread/62216080/#62217203

>>73384558
>second and third world capitalist countries aren't capitalist
hmmmmm

Woke up pretty late lads

posted from my ipad

Prada shades on my face hide my soulless eyes

Why am I
Empty inside

yelping

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>>73384558
really like these

>>73384555
Feudalism wasn't capitalism though. Whenever feudalism started goint away in England in the 1400s, you had capitalistic guys like Shakespeare who created their own businesses

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3 days of work in a row coming up lads
going to quit soon

nto quite sure how stephen malmus managed to craft so many dreamy melodies tbqh

>>73384631
only 20 million Christians? shame.

>>73384593
Depends on the road. Yanks don't even get close to 30mph in built up areas which is British speed limit. And if you think people on the motorway or dual carriageway are doing 20-40 then you're an idiot. Also most yank speed limits are far, FAR lower than in the UK. Your standard 'highway' speed limit is 55mph which is fucking brutal after driving in the UK. Trust me.

imagine the algorithms and calculations that went into creating the mcdonalds monopoly scheme

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>>73384661
>when third world capitalist countries are better than commie states

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Does Europe have these?

>>73384728
do you like cricket?

>>73384728
Only way I can make it through Monday / Tuesday is by repeating to myself "it's just one day; I can make it through one single day". It's only when it gets to around Wednesday that I can start to think "only X more days".

>>73384770
trees? yeah

nto quite sure how stephen malmus managed to craft so many dreamy melodies tbqh

>>73384672
they fall in love with me overnight

>>73384782
I can watch it but don't particularly love it

>>73384770
Look up Spaghetti Juntion

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>>73384631
Pick up a book chav

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>Not having a car

>Literally standing waiting like a mong for 20-40 minutes every single morning to get on a bus full of pensioners and drug addicts.

>Arriving at work in lycra bathed in sweat, running off to the work bathroom to peel it all off and douse yourself in 3 cans of lynx cos "no-one will notice"

>Being too much of a manlet pussy to drive a car, and because you don't wanna admit you're scared you pretend its for some sort of eco-friendly moral reasons and not because you're beta as fuck

You won't believe me lads but I was literally in Sweden for the lorry attacks. Only just got home tonight because I was there on holiday. I was pretty deep into the crowd and we didn't know what was going on. Looking back you could see and hear people yelling and pushing forward then suddenly people were running. I started running just because I heard the screams, I didn't even know the lorry was coming at first. We were just running down the road but pretty soon you could actually hear the lorry, like you could hear the engine and then the thumps as it made contact. By this point it was loud as fuck and I was running as fast as I could but some fat fuck in front of me decked it and I went down with her. On the tarmac I turned over and I could see the lorry coming towards me and the police were already firing shots by this point into the cab but it was still moving forward. I genuinely thought I was going to die then and there and I just closed my eyes. The lorry was still going under inertia and it rolled right up to me. As the 20 tonnes of steel and glass bore down upon me I could feel the heat of the rubber tires between my legs as they rolled agonizingly over both of my soft bollocks; popping them like boiled eggs.

>>73384759
>standard 'highway' speed limit is 55mph
whaaaat

>>73384770
ye

>>73384770
Why do these even exist? Serious question.

>>73384656

https://desuarchive.org/int/thread/62216080/#q62217615

same thread, by far my favourite

>>73384682
the point is that complaining about people living under one system desiring another system is pointless

like you say, if early capitalists had listened to nobles then you never would've had the English revolution or the french revolution

>>73384770

No, we have roundabouts.

>>73384853
please leave even quicker if possible x

>>73384770
we do sort of, but smaller because population and all that

>>73384767
>Bangladesh is better than the former soviet union
really makes you...

>>73384824
>>73384822
Want to pound these girls clunge

Really think we should copy the germans and just remove the speed limit on motorways.

Most people in Germany do about 90 on the autobahn, and it just means you get to where you're going much quicker. If you've got a suitable car you can go even faster of course. Everyone is well behaved and it just works.

>>73384832
Terrific

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>>73384770
ya

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>>73384854
It's impossible to build new roads in the middle of larger cities, so you just build roads over the roads

>some yank bitch crashed into me because she didn't know how to use a roundabout

>>73384853
you are a good lad though

also you can claim citizenship or something

>>73384845
In America it's 55mph for a 'highway' or 65mph if it's 'rural' but even the most remote fucking roads are always still 55mph. Have a stack of yank speeding tickets in my car that I never paid. The only ones you have to pay are Texan ones because the cunts refuse to work with other state legislatures (cause they're crazy people who want to sentence everybody to death without evidence) so you often have to pay on the spot or be taken in by the police unless for some reason they are certain you won't leave the state but as a foreigner that won't happen.

>spend hours installing a game
>it has a small glitch that is unfixable
>have to uninstall and reinstall
ROOOOOO

>>73384910
yea but the german autobahns are straight as fuck

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>>73384929

what the fuck

>>73384910
don't trust cagers in this country to go that fast safely

>>73384971
>pc runts

>>73384873
>English revolution

You're making up things now

>>73384971
ahh yes pc gaming

>>73384118
>half pakistani half bosnian

ah yes

>>73384953
that is bizarre

but also now I have another thing to take the piss out of yanks for, excellent

>>73384993
ah yes
Yank education

>>73384997
https://youtu.be/AxpFylezUaU

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>>73384943
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_Civil_War

>>73385007
>>73385034
meant that for you

>>73384989
lmao I imagine being a bike runt on the autobahn would be pretty terrifying

all the more reason for us to adopt it

>>73384495
Of course.

>>73384910
was in Germany a while ago and the roads were this weird gimmicky 3 lane roads where the middle lane kept switching to either side so you can overtake trucks every now and then
prefer our own roads over that desu

>>73385046
screeching

if I had access to a time machine, where would I go? A question commonly asked but an answer not commonly given.

I'd travel back to April of 1912 and set sail on the RMS titanic although with a few modern amenities and technology. I would dance and joke and eat and watch the clock as the titanic's period of blissful ignorance went unchallenged all the while teetering closer to the abyss. Perhaps by now you're thinking I will save the titanic, her crew and passengers with deliverance of an omen at the 15th hour, but, you are wrong. As the collision occurs and as ancient ice tears through steel, I will be in a pressurised scuba suit (albeit with a few alterations) climbing into a small submarine.

The voyage down to the inevitable grave, not being shallow its one semblance to an honour burial on land, was exhilarating. Upon reaching its final resting place identified 73 years later, I sat in wait. I looked at my watch and saw the time was close, so I began my final journey.

I exited the submarine in my modified scuba suit, that modification being a small rubbed sealed hole in the groin to allow my bollocks to be subject to the extreme pressures of the deep. The pressure itself had me salivating as my bollocks were being crushed under pressure like the creation of diamonds, fitting for the title of family jewels. I swam to the collision point deep in the Atlantic and lay there, saliva filling my mask. Finally, through a thick saliva filled mask, I see the titanic hurtling toward me, my bollocks more specifically. The bow of the ship that bought rose and jack closer to heaven ascends me even higher as it makes contact my bollocks, crushing them with a combination of brute force and water pressure. As I lay on the ocean floor, knackers pulverised and now food for small fish, I drift slowly to sleep thinking that although hearts may go on, my bollocks sure won't.

>>73385034
The aston is really pretty but I'd probably take the LFA

lmao @ the viper

>>73385024
>>73385046
If you're implying the English civil war was a "revolution", then you're dumb as fuck

>>73385056
state of the north

>>73385090
shall not

>>73384993
the Cromwell period lad

bourgeois republicans/parliamentarians asserted themselves over the crown and feudalism

>>73385090
howling

worth the read, shockingly

was making real progress in my ballbuster's anonymous support group but I had a moment of weakness on the way home from work today and I'm fucking ashamed. I was desperate for a piss, so managed to manouver my cock and bollocks out of my trousers and started to go in a 330ml bottle of coke I had lying around in the footwell. However, the bottle starts filling up too quick. Luckily I managed to pull into a layby quickly and jumped out the car, slamming the door shut. Well, in my haste I managed to trap the twins in the door. It was total, euphoric agony.

As I pissed myself in ecstasy and pain I thought back to the words of my priest and case worker, but my animalistic instincts took over, I went into a frenzy. I began slamming the door over and over again, hoping to rekindle the flame in my heart that gave life to my love for having my giblets pulverised. It wasn't enough.

At this point I'm desperate, when I suddenly realise where I am, right next to one of the busiest motorways in the UK, the M6. I popped a stiffy at the thought and waited for a gap in the traffic to cast my family jewels out onto the tarmac. Thankfully years of voluntary work as a sous-chef in return for unlimited access to their pestle & mortar and rolling pins has made my scrot incredibly malleable and elastic, spreading it across the road was no trouble.

After my nutsack had taken a sufficient pounding from the late night trucker crowd I spotted some leakage, mainly from where the staples that were previously holding my boys together had come lose, I didn't think this was a big issue until an OAP-filled minibus aquaplaned across my scrotal discharge and crashed into the side of the motorway. I managed to scrape what was left of my goolies off of the road and get away before the air ambulance arrived, I'm just hoping they can't lift any DNA off of the tyres. I'm pretty sure the M6 is still choc-a-block because of it. I'm fucking wired.

someone make a new thread so cara can be posted I can reply and then the other guy can reply

>>73385107
>he thought that I meant the civil war
Ah yes
Yank education

>>73384929
Why so many? You either need to go north south east or west. What's the point of all that?

>>73385090
>>73385177
screaming

bollocksposting is great

my bus only goes through upper middle class suburbs so don't have to worry about that shite

so i want to make a porn website.

so basically all i want to do is bang some girls without a condom regularly. i'm travelling quite a lot as part of my job and i earn pretty well so i feel like i can afford to fuck random girls around the UK (and maybe europe)

how do i hire them as temp workers? is there like specific forms i need to fill in?

where do i even go about finding these girls?

>>73383482
>putting firecrackers down to kill ants
Jesus you just get every kind of nutter on your neighbourhood don't you..

>>73385148
But that wasn't a revolution. That's why it's called Civil War and not Revolution

can't tell if it stinks of shit in my room and the plumbing's done something weird or if I've just done a malevolent fart without realising

>>73385090
screeching

top post

>>73385280
i was really confused about an odd smell in my room when I woke up this morning, long story short i pissed the bed

>>73385280
>malevolent fart
Hollering

Once, when I were a wee lad, our village was brutally sieged. We prayed to jesu that this would not be our undoing, but it was in all likelihood so.
One day, the watch alerted the townspeople. Our enemy were fast approaching with a battering ram to force themselves into our fair ville. And I was chosen to prepare the ambush.
I was but a child, which meant that as effortlessly as the flower blows in the wind could I mount myself upon the city walls.
The horn sounded. I went to tip the boiling hot oil, but I had slipped on some oil and fallen over the walls! It was in these moments that I evaluated the fair existence god had granted me, for I would surely die before I landed. But just ere my demise,a 4 tonne battering ram had atomised my poor tiny bollocks like puny grapes.

new

>>73385339
>>73385339
>>73385339

why are yanks so bad at name calling
'jerk'
really?

is 14c warm?

>>73385244
all you need is a taxi i think

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>>73385090
someone help me

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>>73385107

Ah yes an uneducated mong. bet you rant about revisionists too

>>73385090
I knew what it was from the start but incredibly well written
Is this OC or an old one?

>>73385267
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glorious_Revolution