/brit/

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*trades you a Guthan's Platebody*
*it was actually a leather body*

migrants are good boys

they dindu nuffin

>the sensationalist/right wing/mainstream media
woah... this is why rorke is so angry...

*squeaks hysterically about brown people for 18 hours a day*
Just spreading the truth here look at this daily mail article

>>73121261
got a side parting and light stubble xx

east anglia literally has no motorways

>>73121366
*reports you to mod mark*

>>73121365
you shagged a fat bird?

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>>73121366

anyone got the ree muslims copypasta>>73121403

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*in the last second changes 3400k to 34004*
*you don't notice*

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the twitch streamer summit1g has 20,000 twitch subs.

now he doesn't release his earnings ratio but let's be conservative and say that he's getting $3.50 per sub (out of $5). That's $840000 USD a year

he also get's at least $500 to $1000 USD a day in donations alone, that's another ~$200000 a year considering he streams most days.

WE haven't even taken into account his sponsorship deals with monster and other companies. Must be getting at least 40k from those.

So here we have a man that's literally earning over $1.1m USD from playing fucking video games every day and streaming it. What a time to be alive.

>>73121366
Scammed one person by switching a rune 2h with an iron 2h and logged out immediately and was paranoid I was going to get banned for about a fortnight lmao

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first for the upcoming war

Yesterday I tried anal masturbation for the first time. As I did normal masturbation, I started opening my butthole and entering a soft dildo in it. At first it was weird and not pleasant, but as my butthole oppened, as much as I thought I would get a prolapse, the dildo got all the way in and it started being a pleasure, soon both my hands, one in my dick and other in the dildo, started moving at the same speed and I got the biggest orgasm ever, my butthole closed so hard I almost broke the dildo and my cum went as far as my bedrooms wall

*lures you into level 1 wild*

ah yes /leftypol/ and /israel/ invades again

the "right wing media" aka the truth media

>>73121419
Don't understand people who give money to streamers

*hires you to mine rune essence for me*

>>73121437
Gibraltar belongs to Spain

British imperialism must go

Psst hey!
ᵀʰᵉ ᴵʳᶦˢʰ

>>73121439
interesting...

Brb, getting my main

>>73121437
we need to nuke madrid early on to show intent

reminder socialism is the new counter culture

wc lvls?

*helicopters my willy around as I stroll into /brit/*

Afternoon lads

>>73121468
friend substitutes

I theorised years ago that a friend simulator youtube series would be excellent and make a lot of money

Communism is the new punk rock

*bursts into tears*

Keep young and beautiful
it's your duty to be beautiful
Keep young and beautiful
if you want to be loved

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>>73121509
IMAJUN MOI SHOCK when a SO-CAWLED TOLURUNT LEFTIST didn't knaw THATCHURISM is tha reel COUNTAHCULCHUH

selling 1.2k lobbies 200 gp ea

*busts you in the chops with a granite maul*

>>73121365
is that a dog on the bed

>>73121468
>*liljimmy76 has donated $5*
>hey man just wanted to say hi and tell you to keep up the positive vibes!

it's so fucking gay

might unironically do a 'go to the doctor about my mental health'

>>73121557
WHICH ONE HAHA

flash:wave: /brit/ a ****

>>73121578
read an article about depression once lad what do you need to know?

>>73121418
I remember the trick of trading someone one coin at a time until they give up and accept a lower price. Someone once tried to do that to me for 4k and I just waited patiently the whole time

r/unitedkingdom having an absolute meltdown

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Might have figured out a way to get out of this group work lads.

Both of the other ///contributors/// are panicking over the deadline and are doing other work. I could offer, in exchange for allowing me to present my own work alone, that I negotiate an extension from the lecturer for those two, on the grounds that "they had other engagements and inadvertently left it to me, and now I'm afraid they won't be able to understand what I've wrote and as such might effect my grade."

Everyone wins - They get an extension to complete the work, minus me, and I get to present it alone. Diplomacy, anyone?

Fishing lvls?

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>mental health
lmao yeah "doc I'm a bit sad" "ahh shit mate I'm gonna have to amputate your head" hahaha what??

>>73121578
*gives a prescription for pills which do absolutely nothing except give you the odd headache and disable your penis*
*puts you on an 8 month waiting list for a therapy service 25 miles away*
Heh nothin personnel kiddo

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>south korea 1971

what happened

>>73121641
glorious capitalism

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLw3eE_5pxw

choon

i've been intellectually out of my depth since I left year 6

>>73121628
hit the nail on the head there keith

>>73121628
wtf I hate schizos now

UK-SPAIN PEACE THREATY

After months of war, Spain and UK agree on the following:

- Retirement of armies in the invaded territories
- The Republic of Seville and Gibraltar will become independent and part of the Brittish Commonwealth
- London will pay 10B$ to Madrid to reconstruct itself after the nuking
- Both Catalonia and Scotland will become independent and join the EU
- Both Spain and the UK will be eliminated forever of the EU because of war crimes
- Basque Country and North Ireland will remain as part of Spain and the UK

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yeah, he has 2 dogs iirc

>>73121641
Thought that might have been Iceland until I saw the trees

autism
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-39459831

>>73121687
everything is great except the last line

>>73121605
>>73121628
>>73121639
hmm on second thoughts I might not, think mum's going to try and make me though

>>73121639
me except my therapy was only a couple of miles away and I stopped going after the first one lmao

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>>73121687
Is it true that your upper class are predominately Anglo? I heard that nothing gets a Spanish girl wet like a South London or Scouse accent. The women revere us, the men fear us, we truly are the masterrace of Iberia.

>>73121690
Lmao

social mobility in the UK is awful

why?

pro EU Ukrainian nazis have bombed st petersburg

i hope you're happy remainers

>>73121419
hes also an annoying cunt

apparently just finished a 2016 ban for posting nsfw mlp, did nothing of the sort

officially putting "runescape actionposting" down on my list of gimmicks

making this post for the archives, in case anyone challenges my ownership in future

>>73121749
nepotism

>>73121727
Lmao

Gonna walk to my job lads, see you in a few hours

hope this attack galvanises Russian anti-muslim sentiments and they fuck up some dune monkeys

>>73121749
idk prolly the jews

>I'm a student

literally translated as

>I'm a pretentious nonce who paid the government £30,000 for a piece of paper which says i can do thing

"excuse me please mate", me, telling you to move whilst you're queuing outside the job centre

>>73121806
the bombing was done by Ukrainian nationalists because putin is in st peterburg

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>hope this attack galvanises Russian anti-muslim sentiments and they fuck up some dune monkeys

>>73121806
>ah yes, PLEASE destabilise the region more and foster more terrorism

stupid short sighted runt

>>73121749
capitalism and monarchism

>>73121524
aka anime

watching twin peaks in before series 3

brb train track

>>73121864
>go to do this
>first episode is literally the length of a film
i'm not fucking made of time

Might inject some ket into my arse

>>73121641
The Korean countryside still looks like that

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>>73121854
since when has st petersburg been a destabilised region

>>73121854
fuck em. there is no peaceful compromise with islam. its all headed towards one conclusion.

hope this attack galvanizes Russian anti-capitalism settlements and they fuck up some capitalist pigs

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>>73121854
>implying
to create something new, we must get rid of the old

>>73121883
this

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>fuck em. there is no peaceful compromise with islam. its all headed towards one conclusion.

Might inject some cum into my arse

>>73121822

me on the left

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>>73121904
SOON

our resident muslim aussie is triggered again.

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Just imagine the absolute state you have to be in to write this kind of comment without a single hint of irony

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gE6pcLshRKE

ahh yes

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>>73121949
back in the helicopter

this bombing is a false flag to justify more russian involvement in syria, calling it now. look out for the crisis actors

>>73121327
maybe my favourite edition ever

>>73121959
Imagine the absolute state you have to be in to screenshot this comment and post it without a single clue that I shan't be reading it

>>73121959
Just imagine the absolute state you'd have to be in to think anyone is even going to expand that image, let alone read it

>>73121949
are there any lefty/pol/ memes that aren't straight rip offs of /pol/ memes?

>>73121984
>>73121992
hmm

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>>73121972
Back in the noose

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>>73121854
>thinking Islamism is a bad thing

Pineal Gland Status: Obliterated

>>73121620
had a look and saw that reddit spacing is very common and not a meme

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>>73121623

Never mind lads, I suggested the idea of an extension and they said 'Fuck that, cba to do it again'. (they've done nothing on it)

I'm fucked

>>73122006
>expecting innovation from communists
lol they're all hivemind insects mate. no substance.

>>73121883
It's worth the time invested. Season 2 goes a bit shitty but gets better towards the end.

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>>73121984
>>73121992

remember once when i was a kid some black kid called me a milk bottle so i called him a milk bottle full of poo

good banter was had by all

haha

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>lol they're all hivemind insects mate. no substance.

>>73122070
Kek

>>73121578
I did this once and felt like a right retard

never went back to the doctor again

>>73122070
should have sent him packing back to zanzibar

>>73122070
remember when we were kids two black lads stood in the middle of our football game so we couldn't play and then my friend called them niggers and they started fighting

haha

>>73122103
lol!

>>73122096
he was right about everything [particularly australians]

>>73122022
this pepe is disturbing

there wasnt a single nonwhite kid in my primary school and only one wog in high school

>>73122091
Yeah it seems like an awful idea
Might just stick to the 'cide plan

>>73122096
truly the world's greatest visionary

eating gluton free pasta

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FILTHY ANGLOS

>>73121437
>brits unironically wanting Al-Andalus, place full of lefty-scum and moors

Its all yours, please just take Murcia too.

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>>73122096

have my penis out right now lads

>>73121921
heyy x

Eating gluon free particles

when you compare the UK flag to every other european flag, you can quickly see how yank tier it is

>>73122120
was actually funny desu
the black lad had one of those baseball bats covered in foam and he was smacking my friend with it but it didnt even hurt

SCREAMING

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4375088/Woman-s-niece-wore-boyfriend-s-penis-ring-bracelet.html

>>73122167
pics thx

>>73122137
Same

Remember the time one black kid turned up at school and it was like woooah look at him

watching dash cam videos again

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>>73122211

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>>73122184
>hur we make 3 stripes different colour
ah yes, european flags

big soft willies

>>73122184
every other euro flag except the scandis is an africa tier tricolour

moyes lads

>>73122184
Tricolour flags are fucking GODAWFUL

Nordic flags are nice
The Union Jack is the best flag on the planet though

Be thankful you get to have it as a cuckstamp

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>social mobility

penis is rock hard right now

It really is funny, a bunch of bigoted racists voted to replace white people who are far more similar to us culturally with black and brown people far more different than us culturally.


Brexiters are scum

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GOAT tricolour flag

>>73122234
need one in my mouth

>>73122271
Not all Brexit voters were bigoted racists lad, some of them were just really thick

>>73122291
>having black on a flag

a bit evil desu

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me

>>73122298
bit queer

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>>73122291
nope

>>73122271
AM VOTIN BREXIT BECUZ WE NEED TA KICK UT THA PAKIS AN THATS THAT!

>>73122255
hint: africa copied europe

now playing: face like thunder by the japanese house

still can't believe that cunt from the lost prophets was a pedo

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>>73122308

>>73122351
actually they copied ethiopia

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best 2bh

Gf's been pestering me to get my willy double checked for the ol' STDs so we can start having sex without using condoms for about a fortnight and I still haven't made an appointment lmao

Don't want to piss in a cup

>>73122365
didnt know your dad was in lostprophets

>>73122365
mohammed?

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>>73122375
not bad
>>73122382
screeching

>>73122368
>there ain't no black on the union ja-

HOW WILL RORKES EVER RECOVER

>>73122382
chuckled

>>73122368
Thatchers Britain

>>73122413
the hammer and sickle make it look queer as fuck like most commie flags

victoria 2 flags > modern day flags

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Spain needs to go back to this one
Need more purple on flags

enter shikari is the worst band on earth

leftist rubbish

>>73122368
that looks fucking sick

best flags usually come for shitty countries

Albania and Macedonia for example. Tricolour flags are very shit and boring. Ours is great but overexposed.

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Business idea: socialism except it's racist

saw my ex-oneitus earlier

had a conversation with her

>>73122478
unironically my sister's favourite band

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its my birthday lads.

>>73122365
You were talking about him this morning

Playing on your mind a bit la?

business idea: republican monarchism

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>>73122506
Someone beat you to it m8

mad to think most of the world copied my flag

>>73122521
is she a lefty twat?

>>73122433
it's the black of the St David flag
>>73122462
it's nazbol

>>73122529
liar

>>73122549
not so radical centrist

doing a ponder

>>73122534
haha that legit must have been another aussie

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>>73122529
happy birthday :3

>>73122539
nah

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GOAT SSR flag coming through

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>>73122539
(((hitler)))

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bender,_Moldova

>>73122478
always thought I was mishearing people when they said "enter shikari", until I saw their name written down and they were actually called enter shikari

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>>73122543
you should sue 2bh

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fan

cgf very pissed at me cos i came on her lads

>>73122478
mate I think our gracious queen should grasp her crown, and take a good fucking swing at Blair and Brown. For leading our country into illegal warfare, and trying to pass it off that we're doing it cause we care

>>73122627
I'll wrap my chair halfway around your skull if you don't fuck off mate

>>73122627
blair cared about sierra leone and was threatened by iraq
what other reason is there?

>>73122624
Hello
What does the 'c' stand for in cgf?
Please respond, thanks

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>>73122611
>>73122597
Really makes you think

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I like Angola's flag

>>73122650
chinese

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Gibraltar accuses EU of behaving like a 'cuckolded husband who is taking it out on the children'

I am literally dying right now. Fucking speechless.

never done an STD test

what do they involve?

do they stick cotton swabs up your urethra for example

>>73122619
probably have more in my wallet than most of the countries who did desu

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>>73122611
(((communism)))

>>73122685
they ram a thing down your urethra

>>73122676
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/04/03/eu-will-not-give-way-gibraltar-diplomats-say-talk-war-dismissed/

reckon national socialism is a kind of socialism

>>73122738
literally the only good form of Socialism

>>73122648
"Now pre-emptive wars are a redemptive case" well I've never heard such nonsense under international laws. We think we have the right to enforce """democracy""" when we're weakening ours everyday. what hypocrisy!

>>73122643
Fuck man. Sounds like you just woke up in a land where killing is part of everyday

getting a bit hot in here lads
might have to take off my clothes

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>search mammys maiden name on forebears.io
>most popular in England, South Africa and Australia. Barely any in Ireland
nononono fuck FUCK OFF

trees are going green

>>73122699
>Trotsky
>behind Stalin

>>73122762
ANGLO'D

>>73122748
fairly good opinion

>>73122699
Mong

Strasser was one of the original NatSocs

>>73122760
9/11 changed everything brp

>>73122762
hello fellow anglo

>>73122729
hmm

how does one go about acquiring a gf(male)
seems like a lot of them are shut-ins

>>73122841
buy them a pair of rainbow thigh highs

>>73122819
dunno mate. Unity's intrinsic, the only cause worth fighting for. all religions, colours and creeds.

>>73122841
my local runt breeder usually has a few in stock

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>>73122818
>>73122775
>being this much of a mong


communism is a jewish plot

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This was the single greatest phone of all time

>>73122870
no, capitalism is
all jews are capitalists

>was the best of all time

hhmmmm

>>73122841
>tfw not pretty enough to be a gf (male)

>>73122873
>tfw never owned one because i don't live on a council estate

>>73122873
FOB

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wireless headphones are the future, and the future is NOW

>>73122762
MICKED

>>73122870
>communism is a jewish plot
so?

>>73122917
>headphones in public

'tism

>>73122873
Wrong

I had the most expensive, most powerful BB and it was still an utter pile of shit

hmm
the phone looks hideous and fat as american

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ah yes communists

>>73122911
>>73122914
Hmmmm

>>73122941
loads of people wear headphones in public, especially these days

>>73122961
loads of people are twats

>>73122943
Did wonders for my social life desu. Such an enjoyable time

>>73122917
I only use in ear headphones desu

drinking beer

>>73122951
>haha look at this cherrypicked picture of someone who isn't even a communist, checkmate lefties!

*donates money to my favourite /brit/ posters*

>>73122993
This
Wearing full size headphones out and about is autism

i was one of those people who wore bluetooth headsets despite never really using it haha

please dont strip my mind

>>73123025
could really do with some extra cash right now

>>73123025
I have always been your favourite poster

>>73122841
very difficult due a worldwide shortage

still using a cracked, dented 5s with random words etched into the back with a broken wine bottle

haha

>>73123092
Gritty af

imo only scrubs have samsung phones

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>>73123050
i wear headphones like these in public but dont actually listen to music lol

>>73123092
really look down upon people with cracked phone screens

>>73122986
>>73122961
a guy I know went out and bought the most expensive beats headphones he could find not because he was stupid enough to believe they were actually good headphones (and he was) but because he just wanted to wear them around his neck in public so people could see them. He hardly even uses them, they're basically a scarf.

>>73123125
oh the front isn't cracked, im not a teenage girl

the back bit glass bits are cracked

>>73123137
dont care about breasts, show me a picture that proves shes got a good personality then ill wank

>>73123124
he's got a shiny head

no one cares you bellend

Please.
It's for my scientific dissertation.

http://www.strawpoll.me/12667824

>>73123092
still using a mid noughties sony ericsson desu

>>73123173
me too
*unzips dick*

>>73123158
that's slightly less disgusting then, carry on

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>whenever someone posts something that only plebs do or that only plebs like it's always something that i do or like

>>73122870
the light reflecting from the sheer amount of your pineal calcification almost blinded me there mate

*makes eye contact with the 'cide*

>>73123210
picked the last one because im daredevil haha

>>73123124
why??

>>73123269
*rattles your cage*

this is the music that normies listen to these days

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8tKKNV5sXUs

>>73123210
>captcha
not a chance

>>73123277
because fuck you thats why

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hey lads

>>73123222
iktf

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>because fuck you thats why

>>73123310
Haha you cheeky cunt

only plebs like cara

just applied for a call centre job lads

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Had a full blown convosation with myself for about 20 minutes today.

>>73123333
only manlets dislike Cara

being a pleb is not a crime

hmm
interesting

i thought a bunch of four-eyed nerds makes /brit/

hey guys i'm here from /v/ but i'm gonna hang out a littlle while i'm a big doctor who fan i love british culture :)

currently working out in the home gymnasium

>>73123343
Legitimately converse with myself for most of the day. Even in public.

Need help.

>>73123295
comfy choon

>>73123375
FOB

>>73123370
>i'm a big doctor who fan

alri madam

*converses with the 'cide*

proper hungover lads

>>73123295
Ross isn't even fucking in this.

>>73123235
me

>>73123386
reckon she needs to get a better fitting top

>>73123324
nice eyes tbeeh

>>73123295
wtf i love normies now!

*starts chirpsing the 'cide*

>>73123410
me2 xx xx

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>women regularly want to kill their own infants
what the actual fuck

*grips the hand of the 'cide and walks away into the sunset*

being a pleb is patrician

>>73123343
>>73123376
nothing wrong with that, helps to gather your thoughts, prepare and relax
i always do it before a test, speech or big occasion

Love it when stephen on qi talks about that handsome horse.

>>73123450
yeah and even if you survive, 4/10 women resent their children.

>Executive Assistant - Part time - Go to the gym on your days off!
amazing benefits on this one lads

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Hi there, /brit/! My name is X@ (it's either Xo or Xa depending on what gender I feel like on a given day). The kind folks over at reddit told me that this was a great place for other folks like myself, so I decided to give it a try!

Anyway, I'm a demisexual panromantic genderfluid male-presenting CAFAB femme (zhie/zhir pronouns, please!). I am bipolar (self-diagnosed), transethnic, transabled and a cat/owl hybrid demon named Roxas. I'm currently in uni majoring in Womyn's Studies.
It's nice to meet you all and I'd love to get to know you! The pic is of me x

So, I'm looking for a film for tonight. What would you suggest to watch that I would like? :)

>>73123497
This just isn't true

>>73123315
cara

>>73123474
I don't do it to gather my thoughts, prepare or relax. I do it to daydream.

>>73123470
Regards, listeners of Danny Brown and Kendrick Lamar

>>73123450
It came from THEIR body its their property shitlord

>>73123512
just watched a movie about the ir*sh called "Young Offenders"
was alright, perfectly captured the essence of irel*nd

I've wrangled, and I've rambled, and I've rodeoed around
I've never once thought of settling down
But darlin', the moment I laid eyes on you
I knew my ramblin' days were through

Made up my mind a long time ago
When the right man came along, somehow I'd know
Heart as true, eyes as blue, and his smile as wide
As a western sky

Let's ride into the sunset together
Stirrup to stirrup, side by side
When the day is through, I'll be here with you
Into the sunset we will ride

Yodelay-ee-hoo

Yodelay-ee-hoo

Yodelay-ee, yodelay-ee, yodelay-ee

I'll be your cowgirl, if you'll be my cowboy
You'll be my Dale, I'll be your Roy
When the day is done, homeward we'll be wending
Like a movie with a happy ending

Let's ride into the sunset together
Stirrup to stirrup, side by side
When the day is through, I'll be here with you
Into the sunset we will ride

Yodelay-ee-hoo

Yodelay-ee-hoo

Yodelay-ee, yodelay-ee, yodelay-ee

it's always been so simple
a same stuff that always happens

some people can rationalize and survive
while others can't, soon they kill themselves

that's the way it is

Seriously, why does the urge to kill your own child even exist? What evolutionary function does this possibly serve?

>>73123512
Not K-ON

>>73123568
>why would someone want to kill a parasite that lives inside you
uh, i don't know

*hops into the 'cide*
*turns the key in the ignition*

>>73123568
Woman's natural tendency to fuck everything up

>>73123568
Why are your reproductive organs the same as the ones you wee out of? Because everything is messy.

>>73123619
It's efficient

>>73123568
>Seriously, why does the urge to kill yourself even exist? What evolutionary function does this possibly serve?

new

>>73123627
>>73123627
>>73123627

>>73123612
get him janny. no mercy.

>>73123612
already alerted are janny, you're fucked m8