You wake up in the Aztec Empire

>>72020837
*coughs*

Sorry guys

>>72020837
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8bSKfWL244

I think I'll strip down and go for a swim.

>>72020837
stop washing my hands after using the bathroom

>>72020963
Imbecile.

>>72020875
>here are pictures of the Aztecs
Fuck that first picture got me.

File: IMG_7621.jpg (187KB, 1228x2048px) Image search: [Google]

187KB, 1228x2048px

>asstecs

>wake up
>wait for the white devil
>the place is burned to ashes
>then pretend I'm white too even tho I'm clearly an indio
>make posts about whiteness everyday for the rest of my life

>>72021191
>Several sorceresses made fun of Huemac for his inability to get women who were fat enough.
>Huemac then had sex with these sorceresses
Fucking kek.
>you will never be this alpha

>>72020875
Fucking hell is this people ever going to stop with their shit?

>>72020875
WE WUZ EVERYTHIN AN SHIEET

>>72020837
cut out some hearts
go home

>>72020875
By the looks of things. The aztecs were jews

File: 1469878547216.jpg (816KB, 827x1040px) Image search: [Google]

816KB, 827x1040px

>>72021399
>>72021464

my ancestors :)

>>72021511
Is that an image of Thor?
WE WUZ NORSE GODS N SHEEIT

>>72020837
Hello my white friends, today I will play for you the song of my people
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Tdu4uKSZ3M

>>72020868
underated

File: Tzitzimitl.jpg (153KB, 700x502px) Image search: [Google]

153KB, 700x502px

>>72021120
It depicts a priest, it depended on the god they committed to, but some of them never washed the blood of their hair

>>72020963
you guys had bathrooms?

>wake up
>give the aztects a whole slew of illnesses they've never encountered before
>inadvertedly cause the fall of their empire
oh damn

>>72024917
The aztecs where massive cunts and every city state around hated them.

>>72025060
Well those other states better stay away or I'll give them the euro pox aswell. I am a bio-weapon.

>>72025060
Any empire is a massive cunt. Spain was literally at war with Portugal, Netherlands, Italy, France, England, several German kingdoms, the Berbers and the Ottoman empire at the same time.

File: 1415855823374.jpg (208KB, 1000x669px) Image search: [Google]

208KB, 1000x669px

>>72025134
Work your yuro tacos first.

>>72020963
Will you keep using your shit bucket to throw it out the window?

>>72025185
Eww vegan

>>72025060
Proof mexicans are still Aztec indios no one likes them

>>72025185
Looks like disgusting soggy mush taco

>>72020837
Send word to the king of Spain to make a sweet sweet deal. I always wanted a mansion on the Balearic islands.

>>72021191
>additionally, he should be able to engage in sexual activity with the gods, since, as we have seen, such activity was allowed for priests and leaders of his level.
>The fact that he engaged in such activity with male gods would not seem particularly problematic either, as those gods had turned themselves into women
Bruh

>>72025462
Seems like the "are traps gay?" dilemma was solved long ago by the Aztecs.

>>72020868
Kek

>>72020875
Why do people make this shit? seriously.

File: 1472625932771.png (83KB, 492x203px) Image search: [Google]

83KB, 492x203px

>>72025666
>are traps gay?" dilemma was solved long ago by the Aztecs
*by the Toltecs, and they were not the only ones apparently

>>72025462
Aztecs confirmed traps are gay as fuck bruh.

>>72025989
"he fought with magic"

Na nigga, Odin had a spear and went to war on his eight-legged warhorse.

>>72020868
criminally underrated

Well that's offensive Aztec is the way the other cities used to call mexica culture as a offense, because the legend says mexica people where slaves form the Aztlan people (somewhere in Arizona) so they flee from Aztlan to be free, so call them Aztecs it's like call a bullied guy by the name of his bully (>_>)"

>>72020837
Annihilate the entire population with a sneeze.

>>72020837
Invent the frappe latte and the cigarillo, so I can live like a civilised North American teenager.

>>72025989

No homo though.

>>72020868
This is Quetzal's feathers!

File: clapping.gif (3MB, 320x291px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 320x291px

>>72020837

>be Aztec
>get sacrificed

>>72020963
Better make the sign of the cross to your hands and eat that bun with your holy hands

>>72021191
based HUEmac

>>72021191
Just to make this clear, Tescatlipoca is like the word Elohim is a pronoun for gods.

>>72026993
They mostly sacrificed slaves of war... and their most attractive youth... and valiant warriors... and paragons of virtue. But those latter three were brainwashed all their lives, and saw being sacrificed as the greatest accomplishment in this life.

File: 1479100233429.jpg (372KB, 807x791px) Image search: [Google]

372KB, 807x791px

>>72020837
The Aztec Empire will rise again.

>>72027199
>and their most attractive youth
do you have a single source to back that up
>and valiant warriors
not theirs, and by the time men went to war they already had children

>>72027249
I really hate that picture, it´s like saying that modern american soldiers kill people in the middle east to be as powerful as crusaders

>>72027348
> do you have a single source to back that up
It was in school textbooks. The priests would sacrifice the most beautiful, fertile virgins of their city. As well as healthy, intelligent pubscent boys.

This was only when there was a catastrophe, I believe. Give the Gods your best to keep them appeased, and such.

> not theirs, and by the time men went to war they already had children
I'm not saying they didn't reproduce.

I believe the general principal behind Aztec blood sacrifice is, there was the regular stream of blood the priests needed so the sun would rise and set and the universe would keep existing (they used foreign slaves, captured in war). But when their nation had especially bad luck, they'd give their finest offerings to get the Gods back on their side.

File: doctored.jpg (43KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

43KB, 500x500px

>>72027557
>fertile virgins of their city
What are they trying to say?
WOW what slut shamers, not like the north American savages who had no civilization and no rules.

Verginity and anti-whore ideas obviously comes from oppressive christianity...!

File: 1459764709618.jpg (31KB, 381x336px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 381x336px

>>72020868
Kek

>>72020837

*clears throat*

Hace exactamente 498 años el 18 de febrero de 1519 Hernán CORTÉS hijo predilecto de MEDELLÍN y crisol de la virtud EXTREMEÑA partió con su flota de 11 barcos y teniendo por única arma SU PROPIA POLLA conquistó a los indios CANÍBALES COMEPERROS y SALTAMUROS conocidos hoy en día, dios me perdone, como MEJICANOS. El EXTREMEÑO y el MEJICANO son polos opuestos, pues el EXTREMEÑO es hombre de HONOR y PROBIDAD FRANCO y SACRIFICADO lo que le llevó a abandonar sus HERMOSAS DEHESAS y conquistar todo un HEMISFERIO, mientras que el MEJICANO es un ser entregado a la DESIDIA y a la DEPRAVACIÓN cuyas máximas aspiraciones son DECAPITAR a su prójimo COMER CHAPULINES y NO DESCUBRIR LA RUEDA.

EL MEJICANO NO ES DIGNO DE BESARLE LOS PIES A UN EXTREMEÑO NI DE FIGURAR SIQUIERA EN LA RAZA HUMANA.

>>72020868
Topkeke
>>72025989
Damn I guess liking traps isn't a new thing

>>72032642
Why must you shitheads invade every post about Mexico? You will never be a great empire again and Columbus was a rapist Italian.

File: leutze-Storming-of-the-Teocalli-by-Cortez-and-His-Troops.-1848.1.jpg (473KB, 2560x2173px) Image search: [Google]

473KB, 2560x2173px

sandiego!
cortes did nothing wrong

>>72033175
>sandiego!
Santiago*

File: 1487914740760.png (686KB, 480x640px) Image search: [Google]

686KB, 480x640px

>>72020868

>>72033149
>only 3 spanish posts
>why you invade every thread about Mexico!!!
Build a wall

>>72020868
I don't get it

>>72033891
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_smallpox_in_Mexico