International jokes

Guys I think you forgot to post on this thread.

Why is it always that in threads that were not even supposed to be jokes or banter at the end those threads have great banter and the ones made specifically for banter is full of shit jokes and banter??

>why do the Spanish not work
>they're lazy!

>>71124174
ahahaha good one my dude

How is American beer like having sex in a canoe?
It's fucking near water

>>71124293
That's just rude desu.

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>>71124030

>>71124530
Sorry

>>71126066
It's ok, we all make mistakes sometimes but it's important to learn from them.

Why chinese cross street?
Cos ur mom a whore

>>71122900
savage

>>71127280
I don't get it.

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y do spen run from bull ?
becuz horns hert

why is your life so shit
cus u shit

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what's the difference between a Belgian and a nigger?

>belgians have smelly elbows

>>71124116
Because of a speficic contrarian,non-conformist mindset that we're all being conditioned to participate in, masquerading as 'board culture'

>>71127407
It's funny because it's true.

>>71122900
Polish ** people**

On his trip to the Soviet Union, President Kennedy saw many drunks. He asked Nikita about it. Surprised Nikita replied "...and there are no drunks in the US, in NYC?" "No" answered Kennedy. "When you come to NYC, you may shoot first three drunks you see." After 6 months, Nikita came to NYC, and walked out of the Soviet embassy. He shot first three drunks he saw, and came back, and went to sleep. When he waked up next day, he read in the New York Times "A bald, short gangster shot three employees of the Soviet embassy."

>why do americans store guns in their fridges?
>because they are fat and suck dick ahah wena

>>71122900
>Why do people hate gypsies?
Because they steal everything they find in your house and shit on your bed.

>>71122900
Why there were deaths due to Holocaust?

They absolutely positively unanimously wanted to get rid of the klezmer music.

An american tourist arrives at Spain and he asks a local:
- Do you speak English?
- ¿Cómo dice usted?
- Do you speak English?
- ¡No lo entiendo!
- Le pregunto que si habla usted Inglés.
- ¡Ah sí, perfectamente!

>>71129137

I dont get it

>>71129195
¿Cómo dice usted?

>>71129610

no comprendo

>>71129195

¿Qué?

>>71129635

No entiendo la broma

>>71122900
you are cringy 12yo tier

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>>71129195
>be american
>get spaned

>>71129632
>>71129667

Ah vale! perfectamente.

>>71130291
Your flag looks like anus red from tearing. Red circle is the anus.

A Chinaman walks into a bar and sits down for a drink, all of a sudden a Jew walks up to him and punches him in the face. "Wtf was that for?", says Chinaman. "That was for Pearl Harbor", said the Jew.
"But I'm Chinese"
"Chinese, Japanese, Koreanese, it's all the same to me"
The Jew walks back to his table.
The Chinaman, after a few drinks, then walks up to the Jew and punches him in the face.
"Wtf was that for?", says the Jew.
"That was for the Titanic", says Chinese
"But that was an iceberg"
"Iceberg, Goldberg, Bloomberg, it's all the same to me"

>>71122900
Loled

>>71130664
>The Chinaman, after a few drinks, then walks
This was a pretty funny bit.

>>71130664
heh

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The greatest ever but totally forgotten Russian scientist invented the electrical switch.

His name was Nikolai Poweronoff

>>71122900
What's the difference between a Belgian and a lump of dog shit? The Belgian drinks wine, but the dog shit smells good.

>>71133716
Top kek m9

Who is the best manwhore in the world? Kunta Kuntlicker.

>>71128088
Kekekeke

>>71130664
Ayyy lmao

Three strangers strike up a conversation in the airport passenger lounge in Bozeman, Montana, awaiting their flights.

One is an American Indian passing through from Lame Deer.
Another is a Cowboy on his way to Billings for a livestock show .
The third passenger is a fundamentalist Arab student,
newly arrived at Montana State University from the Middle East.

Their discussion drifts to their diverse cultures.
Soon, the two Westerners learn that the Arab is a devout, radical Muslim and the conversation falls into an uneasy lull.

The cowboy leans back in his chair, crosses his boots on a magazine table and tips his big sweat-stained hat forward over his face.
The wind outside is blowing tumbleweeds around, and the old windsock is flapping; but still no plane comes.

Finally, the American Indian clears his throat and softly he speaks,
"At one time here, my people were many, but sadly, now we are few."

The Muslim student raises an eyebrow and leans forward,
"Once my people were few," he sneers, "and now we are many. Why do you suppose that is?"

The Montana cowboy shifts his toothpick to one side of his mouth and from the darkness beneath his Stetson says in a drawl,
"That's 'cause we ain't played Cowboys and Muslims yet, but I do believe it's a-comin'."

An american, a russian, a brit and an arab are sitting in a plane, when all of sudden they hear the pilot talking through the speaker:
"Attention to all passengers, one engine caught fire and we're loosing altitude rapidly. We need to drop as much weight as possible if we wanna make it".
The american, hearing this reaches for his backpack and starts emptying it through the plug door. Wtf are you doing? ask the other passengers.
"I'm throwing away my money, we have lots of that in america."
The russian, hearing this, pulls out a wooden crate and starts throwing out some vodka bottles from it. Wtf are you doing? ask the others.
"I'm just throwing out my vokda, we have a lot of it back in russia."
The brit then suddenly looks at the arab, grabs him, and pushes him off the plane. WTF are you doing??! ask the two others.
"I'm just throwing out my arab, mates. We've got tons of them in the UK"

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>>71122900
haha nice one, let me try!

>why do the Polish eat raw meat?
>because they're too dumb to cook and also have big penis

>>71128088
That's some top level bantz my man

>>71134293
Shit tier
Macedonia what the shit

an irishman walks out of a bar

>>71134931
There are so many versions of this.

>>71134931
the joke should've ended in
>The brit then suddenly looks at the arab, grabs him, and pushes him off the plane.

anything else just takes all the fun out of it and makes you look retarded for explaining that far.

Brit, Frog and Burger get captured by terrorists. They are scheduled to be executed by firing squad.

They line up the Brit first and ask if he has any last words.. "tsunami!"
Everybody runs away and Brit escapes.

Then they prepare the Burger and ask him the same... "tornado!"
Everybody runs again and Burger gets away.

Finally they prepare the Frog for execute, and ask him also...
"Fire!"