/brit/

yorkshire

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TIDDLY DEE I HAD BETTER START ME LADS A NEW /BRIT/ THREAD SO THAT I MAY EXPRESS JUST HOW BRILLIANT MY RACE IS DESPITE BEING A BUNCH OF SUBHUMAN DRUNKEN MONKIES

WOOHAA TIDDLY DEE TIDDLY DOO I MIGHT HAVE A BIG MICK POO

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*grabs your uncle*
*makes him dig a grave*
*shoots him in the head and burys him*
only good proddy is a dead one

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>yank "sports"

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new phone, whomst dis

>>70869036
is this actually true

>>70868953
Maybe she meant coca-cola

>>70869063
https://www.wsj.com/articles/SB10001424052748704281204575002852055561406

>>70869036
its creeping into british sports too
The Champions league final had tinie tempah playing at it last year

>>70869082
don't reply to me

roast pork and haslet sandwiches today lads
like the pig holocaust but with lettuce

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me in the middle

Grab them by the ponny

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Giving the ol' motorcyle a wash

Why don't you ride one /brit/?

>the extreme free speech message board 4chan

Ah yes

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-trending-38829249

>northerners

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_BBLweC2_Q

American superbowl wins - 51

Euro superbowl wins - 0

are you runts even trying?

>>70869085
did he score?

American world cup wins - 0

>>70869092
haslet is based af

>>70868221
lmao she's german

>>70869112
No interest in motorised fedoras

why do so many non-whites have schizophrenia?

thinking of you doing a poo x

Why are British TV shows so plain boring??
I'm watching 'bargain hunt' on BBC one.

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>>70869167
>I can't ride a motorbike

>>70869189
why does it need to be exciting?

>>70869175
Inbreeding

>>70869189
can't you appreciate a good bargain?

>>70869189
>why is day time TV for retired people boring?

becoming less racist

4chan is actually kind of a bad website. I go to this place called reddit. its like 4chan but actually better and funny with lots of really funny memes and everything

>>70869175
culture shock

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-38762034

absolutely howling at the frothing rorkes in the comments

>>70869112
Can't afford a Harley XR750 and don't want anything else

>>70869200
Because my life is plain boring and I need "excitement"
>>70869213
I guess so?? :-/
>>70869216
This! :-)

>>70869098
christ, the nashers on the one on the right

>>70869248
>all the leave voters were fickos lol

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>co-worker has lots of tattoos
>ask him how much one on his arm cost
>6 thousand fucking pounds

brb becoming a tattoos artist

>>70869029
*puts you in a cell*
*you smear shit on the walls and starve to deah*

is bernard shaw irish or british?

>>70869299
Irish

used to love watching How Clean Is Your House when I was temporarily NEET a few yrs back. my flat was clean as fuck as a result

Did the man draw the picture on the other mans skin?

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>with lettuce

>>70869282
Need to get into the tattoo removal service meself

don't really understand homophobia/racists/whatever

can't they just choose to not be offended? or are they too dumb to not have control over themselves?

Why do people still watch daytime TV when the internet exists

>>70869351
>the internet exists
does it?

>>70869351
Because Tim Wonnacott is comfy

hello? (hello, hello hello, hello, hello...)

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>>70869351

>Things exist

bye

>>70869351
Because I can't watch streams with my 17kbps bandwidth.

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>>70869351
>he thinks the internet is real

>>70869386
>gif
fuck off

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>>70869267
Found a cheap HD on ebay for you

£2000

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just imagine how ugly phimo is

bet you'd turn to stone if you looked at him

>>70869401
good gimmick, this could catch on

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>you will never know your real IQ because that shit's only accurate when you're younger

>touchdown shitsville shirtlifters!!!!! woah man!!!!
>we'll be right back after this short commercial break from shekelstein legal services
>welcome back football fans. knobstown knobhounds trail ten-eighteen in superb owl fiddy-one
>chad dikcheeski is not having a good night tonight

>>70869351
background noise mostly. I really like having top gear reruns just playing away on the tele while I'm shitposting or doing random chores etc

doing a swimming based HIIT session tonight lads

godzilla didn't breathe fire

>>70869114
>extreme free speech
kek, this site has the exact same free speech rules as America. Whats so "extreme"

>>70869451
godzilla isn't real

>>70869451
That's not Godzilla bitch, that's Galthizor: the eternal opponent of intelligence

Maybe you need a few extra points

Could afford a brand new Harley Davidson right now

>>70869163
>german

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>>70869451

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=godzilla+breathing+fire&rlz=1C1GIWA_enGB647GB647&espv=2&biw=2133&bih=1082&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjk8besvvvRAhUBHpAKHUykCPUQ_AUIBigB

>>70869457

Still amazes me that an Anime forum became such a big boogeyman

https://twitter.com/wikileaks/status/828582516797890560

So what happened to all of the Farage fanboys? Still here?

Like my women like I like my whiskey, lads

going KFC for a fillet box meal xx

>>70869444
RIP

>>70869525
12 years old?

>>70869500
its an easy thing for the media to attack because its such a shock for a normie to read and also theres no users only anonymous posts

>>70869526
get those new zinger chips and let me know if they're any good

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>>70869523
Yes

Bit disappointing he became Trumps fanboy though

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female coworkers just asked what I'm doing for valentines day

>>70869525

for £12 ?

>>70869550
>>70869597
yes

>>70869589
normie cunt hope you die

Religious demographics of UK prisons:

No religion - 26,626
Church of England - 23,039
Roman Catholic - 14,296
Muslim - 9,795
Buddhist - 1,737
Sikh - 648
Atheist - 570
Agnostic - 514
Hindu - 434
Pagan - 366
Rastafarian - 340
Jehovah's Witness - 230
Jewish - 220
Scientology - 3

Your opinions??

>>70869589
why didn't you ask her out

>>70869621
scientologists are obviously the most moral

>>70869621
need these as percentages of the general population before I make a racist statement

>>70869621
> Atheist and agnostic seperate to 'No Religion'
brilliant survey

>>70869630
>i figured you were a southern girl you were above that
what did he mean by this

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>working at petrol station
>2 black women come in
>whispering to each other
>hear one say 'naw he's too young'

The so called gf
https://youtu.be/Gp7KQizNwDc

>>70869693
roastie

>>70869570
Just got here, they don't serve em yet

>>70869657
idiot

>>70869614
>>>/eirefeel/
>>70869625
not in an invitation sort of way
they're both married or in a long term relationship

Might break up with the gf 2bh

>>70869728
double idiot

>>70869745
Font 2bh

>>70869746

Looks like a tube of wine gums

>>70869763
shan't

>>70869746
fucking hell alri magneto how's mystique

>>70869749
a belief in god or a deity or a god like figure does not have include a subscription to a religion

>>70869746
Pure Motherfucking Magic!

>>70869794
belief in a god is literally religion you spacker

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Who are your favourite psuedo-intellectuals?

>>70869841
big brain wojak

GOOD
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-38751307

>>70869836
absolute SPACKER
getting shown up by a p*ddy, shameful

recently started putting some tabasco on my toasties
whole new world opened up

I wish women's clothing wasn't so comfy

>>70869888
read a dictionary you fucking squid

>>70869886
what a load of utter shite that article is

literally cannot find a minimum wage job that isn't near entirely staffed with foreigners around here

>>70869910
why don't you want women to be comfy, you fucking misogynist

>>70869927
I'm comfy and that's all that matters

>>70869961
is that because you are wearing women's clothing

>>70869975
yes

>>70869886
I imagine they'd probably be demanding special prayer breaks and other religion-related shit

> nearly have to leave to go to lectures
> get a bit anxious
> start needing a poo badly
> too late to have a poo and still be on time for lectures
every time

>>70869987
absolute octopus

>>70869802
Fuck off back to the 'ddit, paddy

Lads ... I should warn you

*flicks open stainless steel cigarette case*
*takes one between two fingers*

I

*grips the cigarette tightly between my teeth*
*lights it in one smooth flick with my lighter*

am

*blows a puff in your face*

Anonymous

*smirks*

>>70870009
you... CUTTLEFISH ughhh

I feel comfy looking at women's groins not at male groins, I hate bulges. Maybe I'm phallophobic or gender dysphoria.

https://mobile.twitter.com/TimmyUk/status/828559531496108032

>>70870067
'nce

>unexpected phonecall from a private number at exactly 13:00
haha "no"

>>70870051
*offers you a vape from my vape thing*

>>70870051
backtracing you as we speak

>>70870022
*flicks rubber band at you sending you flying across the room and crashing through the wall, exploding on impact*

>70870073
>mobile.twitter.com
off you fuck

>>70870073
what mental disorder does he have

would like to read the Wikipedia article on it

>>70870114
Paranoid schizophrenia I think

Can anyone send me the BBC news soundtrack?? It really sounds comfy.

dont like buying toilet roll
everyone in that shop knows exactly what im going to do with it
"eurgh, he's going to poo and then wipe the poo off his pooey bumhole with that toilet paper"
it's embarassing

need a poo but I'm gonna let it brew
yes that's right I need a poo
but it's not coming now, I'm letting it brew

>>70870085
Oh, you want my IP my man?

*passes you my digital business card*

It's 192.168.0.1

See you soon bud

>>70870098
fuck off to /ira/, boring fucking spudnigger

>>70870143
get a bidet

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ate too much and now i'm sick as a dog

>>70870051
>*grips the cigarette tightly between my teeth*
how to spot a mong

think i have a sex addition lads. every time i see a beautiful woman i think about having sex with her.

>>70870145
poetic

>>70870073
his walkabout pictures are comfy af

>>70870146
doxxed your router
192.168.0.254

>>70870143
You know why? Because it reminds us of our animalistic core nature.

>>70870172
Anon have you considered that might have been intentional?

>>70870140
ahh yes because we were all sent an mp3 when we renewed our tv licences

>>70870171
misread this as "ate a dog and now im sick"
glad it wasn't that

Saw the qtest girl in lecture today lads
think Im in love

>>70870199
damage control

>>70870195
y-y-you're fast! It's time for Execution Omega

*presses the rest button on my router*

business idea: go back in time and castrate myself before puberty takes hold

>patriots
>pat riots
>paddy riots
coincedence?

>>70870195
Can you also hijack my cam. Do you want to post my ugly autistic face on here??

so this evening, do i:
a) go out for drinks with a pretty girl
b) do deadlifts in a hot room surrounded by sweaty, muscular men
unironically having trouble deciding

spent the last 3 hours solid working and it looks like I might make it for the deadline to submit my coursework lads. might even get a good grade.

going to chemically castrate myself to cure my homosexuality

>>70870219
That's right kid, I control the damage

...but I feel like I'm about to lose control

*ascends to the fifth dimension*

*rees loudly*

this place is fucken austirstic

>>70870246
a)

lifting is for pozz-cuckolds

>>34678477

>The Poonited Sharts of Arsemerica

absolutely hootering and hollering over the large number of rasheeds who voted remain because they were worried about a recession

>>70870342
same and I'm a rasheed

>>70870362
rasheed

>>70870362
rasheed

>>70870304
heh, dats right kid. This here's da crazy house where the inmates done taken over

only kweschun you gotta ask yesself is

*razorblade tumbles into my fingers*

is you one of us, or a 'tor?

>>70870382
a what?

what is the point of prenuptial agreements when they're not even legally binding?

she came from greece she had a thirst for knowledge

that boy needs therapy

>>70870393
>prenuptial agreements
can't hear this without thinking of Liar Liar

>>70870391
y'know

*puts the razorblade up to my lips*

wunna dem

*lights it with a novelty pepe candle*

's

*takes a puff*

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FINALLY an intermediate lifter lads
what are your 1rms?

>>70870393
They aren't legally binding but they can still be used to settle divorce cases.

>>70870382
>>70870441
very well executed posting and gimmickry

>>70870469
I can 1rm your mum so about 40st

>>70870304
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4TSJhIZmL0A

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>>70870469
Just started really

>>70870514
pingin off me tits

whats the most yank name? id say Chuck

>>70870519
n-NANI!?!?!?

>>70870469
are you a manlet? i feel like you're a manlet.

>>70870552
Codey

>>70870552
hunter

got called a manlet in greggs

>>70870552
Lincoln

>>70870566
unironically 6'2
what makes you think im a manlet

>>70870552
Travis

>>70870552
Chet

eating soup

>>70870641
Very English of yours

>>70870620
the way you type

being a sweaty person is absolute hell
thank fuck im not hairy as well

>>70870552
Juan

soup here

currently being eaten by some ugly cunt

>>70870620
Kid...the height ain't measured from your soles to your scalp

*taps the side of my head*

It's from your dick to her pussy!

*screams*

>>70870552
Justin

>>70870683
please don't call me ugly i have very low self esteem

>>70870700
same wanna not be friends in case one of us rejects the other

>>70870679
I don't sweat. But I get huge hell-ish hives and itches because of it...

>>70870679
nice rhyme

>>70870700
Well if you leave the soup a little longer it won't have much 'steem either

*plays the guitar at you*

>>70870672
well you WOULDNT say SHIT to my fucking FACE mate

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could you overpower and kill the average woman?

*farts at you*

>>70870700
I have low self-esteem as well because of tiny dick.

>>70870760
probably

>>70870748
typed exactly how a manlet would type. don't believe your lies about your height.

>>70870760
*lunges at you and holds a butterfly knife, hand-crafted by sagatosa himself, to your throat*

I am no average woman

got called a Mackdaddy in the club

no idea what that meant so just nodded and walked away

>>70870719
well i didn't mean have zero sweat glands, just it would be nice if my back wasn't capable saturating a shirt in seconds

>>70870793
wtf im literally 6'2
that thing i posted lists my weight at 100kg, if i was a manlet i'd be fucking spherical

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why do you say you eat soup if you drink it

>>70870817
never understood the difference between a mackdaddy and a daddymack desu

>>70870839
*rolls you down a slope*

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currently at work

SAVE ME

big big fan of this action posting australian, extremely happy that the gimmick is being preserved

getting lots of unnecessary attention from my soup post

everyone just stop

>>70870874
souperb post

>>70870851
soups aren't 100% liquid

>>70870839
>still lying
it gets more and more obvious that you can barely see over your keyboard with every manlet sentence you type shortlad

>>70870837
I see you want to be Mr.Average right?

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do you wee out soup or does it come out as poo?

>>70870911
it goes in as wee

>>70870890
True some of them have vegetable, meat particles in them.

>>70870895
REEEEEEEE

Got a chicken Caesar salad from the Sains' but it didn't have a barcode

Pretended to scan it at self service and nicked it

Still high off the thrill

>>70870911
depends if its campbell's chunky or not

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the absolute state of london

>>70870935
have you never had a chunky soup?

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>>70870955

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>>70870955
>got 3 cheese twists from tesco
>tell the self-checkout that i got one
>sprint out of the shop before they arrest me

>>70870935
you sure know your soups mister

>need a few things from Tesco
>didn't think I'd need a bag
>ended up with a bit more
>go self-checkout
>put them in a bag anyway
>Number of bags: 0
CAN'T STAND IT
I KNOW YOU PLANNED IT

all sorted for E's and Whizz

Everyone get to the dancefloor

am 5'9

not that bad 2bh

>>70870983
>>70871011
You have soups and meal soups...

>>70870955
I have always pilfered from supermarkets and the introduction of self-checkouts have made it even easier

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>>70871005

>>70871075
Say again lad?

Don't have ears on my knees lads, speak up!

>no yanks around
>/brit/ is really good now
hmmm odd coincidence

>>70870982
craig david's new music video features black guys practically harassing random white girls in the metro haha

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>>70871063

Having a Muslim name can have effects on your employment possibilities.

>>70871096
*jumps between you tree trunk legs and latches jaw onto your bollocks with a vice like grip*

*muffled sounds*

ing...aid....ingmf...ive...oot...ine...

>>70870984
>>70871083
>>70871113
hmm

everybody knows that dinosaurs go rawr

>>70871005
>got a braeburn in sainsburys
>put it through the self serve till as a gala
call the cops i don't gaf

its leet time lads

>>70871132
Positively so that companies can fill the quota I reccon

>>70870552
Hernandez is the quintessential yank name

listening to pulp as i take my nootropics stack
about to do some meditation
how we all feeling

Just imagine Quebec without whinging separatists lads

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEly-bm5eU0

>>70871198
you tried phenibut lad?

>>70871178
quotas are illegal in the UK

still think it might actually be beneficial having a foreignname though

>>70871207
nah was considering it, do you recommend it?

>>70871226
nah never tried it, just read some stuff about it and it sounded pretty good

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It's my birthday soon. How's everyone going?

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>he doesn't eat his lunch in lidl car park

paul joseph watson looks and sounds like he's a manlet

>>70871271
I think you might be right

gay boys

went over to the lads' house to watch the superbowl last night

that was a fucking mistake

>>70871262
the apple reminds me of the base of my bellend

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZrhRcp3pBA

>>70871243
Happy early birthday lad

>>70871294
;3c

really need to dress up like a lady and be shagged by blokes in bathrooms of gay bars and clubs

>>70871262
state of this cunt

Sitting on a bench watching the ducks play about x

>>70871271
>body shaming

ah yes, the SO CAULD TAWLERUNT left is at it again

In the pond with the lads and this nutcase keeps throwing bread at us

>>70871271
the so-called TOLERANT AUSTRALIANS just called me a MANLET
imagine my shock

What will the brits do we the Muslim population after Brexit.

there sure are a HELL of a lot of doctors and scientists from syria. they must have been living a thousand years in the future there before it went to shit

alri, bread here
some ugly mong keeps launching me at some runts in a pond

>>70871271
how bout you say that to his face .. you PIECE of SHIT!

I am a kissless-handholdless-virgin, Ask Me Anything!

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Shall be locking into this tonight

>trump supporter tom brady's team wins the superbowl, pulling it back from the brink at the last second
pottery

>>70871455
whats your sign

Some lad with a nice bum just sat on me now he's watching the ducks

why do non-americans watch the superb owl?

>>70871459
what will they be 'taking over'? the local kebab shop?

>>70871471
Aquarius

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>>70871465
>mfw for a fleeting moment black people thought they were actually going to accomplish something

would love to have a cute baby daughter lads

imagine having someone look up to you

>>70871489
Runts will be runts

>>70871506
also aquarius, can confirm that i too am a virgin

short flatchested girls really rev my engine iykwim lads

david beckham is a right shit head. what the fuck sort of cunt worships him?

>>70871513
'once

>>70871513
nonce

>>70871541
nonce

whats the racial angle to the superbowl tweets I keep seeing?

were the losing team all/mostly black or something?

>>70871576
well they were american, so yes

>>70871561
>>70871571
nonces

>>70871571
am not.

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what an elite star sign

>>70871576
atlanta is coon central so probably

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Glorious

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truly an inspiration to all the mandem

>>70871605
don't forget ayn rand

>>70871633
>>70871633
>>70871633

new

>>70871633
>>70871633
>>70871633

>>70871627
what are you going to do with your magnificent download speed lad?

>>70871576
patriots are known for generally always having mostly white receivers (the guys who catch the throws) which is unusual since its probably the most athletic position

theory: there is such an outrage to Trump purely because American society had become so accustomed and comfortable to a liberal, left-leaning narrative of the Obama administration that even the very sight of conservatism makes them scream. a lot of Trump's policies- hard stance on immigration, abortion, the cutting of taxes and the opening of oil pipelines would have been followed by pretty much any Republican candidate as president, but the radical progressive democrat culture of America for eight years has made them forget that things don't always go their way and that conservatives exist in their country as well. They're just a lot quieter and less prevalent in the media and in popular culture

>>70871546
Cannot understand people defending him. Basically admitted his charity work is just a front for his campaign to receive a knighthood, which he won't get now. Kek.

>>70870552
Jared