/brit/

cheeky cara

>>70850404
>>70850404
>>70850404
real

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCqycBENrwA

It's as if some B-movie trailer editor edited a high school video project about helping the homeless.

This is the face of Catholicism today.

>you have a way with words
she is MOCKING me
she is calling me AUTISTIC

Do you lads shave your armpits?

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wanted to post this

some pissed up rorke called me a paki bastard in the pub earlier
he could see i had a pint in my hand and obviously not religious, bit nasty imo

>>70857384
No, are you a bender perchance?

>>70857363
>thread wars
ah yes. Yanks and their """fun"""

>>70857384
ye

>>70857391
tell us what happened lad

>>70857397
yes but i don't do it for bent reasons i do it for hygiene reasons

>>70857385
SHRIEKING

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NEED me a cara gf lads

>>70857385
how is that anything to do with 911

Or should I say moved BACK into a male prison

http://dailym.ai/2lcegFC

WTF??

Why was HE ever allowed to serve his time in a woman's prison anyway? Don't get me wrong I have no problem with transsexuals and would even say I'd have a pint with Pile if I ever met her/him so diversity isn't an issue for me, but all this fucking pandering to people and their 'needs' by the fucking do-gooders of our generation just pisses me off especially when it goes against basic fucking common sense

The thought process after sentencing should have been simple 'born with a cock, send him to mans jail..... just incase he decides to use his cock on the female prisoners'

Which of course he did - twice - as in they never learnt the lesson first time round that he isn't a fucking woman and shouldn't only be allowed an easier time of his murder sentence being in a women's jail to begin with rather than some hard knock mans jail like Barlinnie, but shouldn't have the opportunity to fuck anything that moves which he's clearly able to as the lags would be desperate for any old cock

I was going to end the rant with a Partridge-esque 'this country' but it's Scotland so instead I'll just point and laugh

Convinced people who own dogs are retarded

>ah yes, i do enjoy being licked by a vile animal

>>70857432
she jumped off the roof

>>70857391
Bit rude yeah
just ignore him la. Was out drinking with my french mate the day after the brexit vote and he asked some old fella if he could use his lighter. "FUCK OFF, we voted leave and you're all FUCKING OFF".
Just pissed up people being dickheads, he'd have said something to someone regardless

I would like to declare my independence from /brit/.

>>70857450
1. All women like dogs.
2. All women are retarded

Your postulation holds up, it seems.

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>vile animal

why can't /brit/ get dubs?

>>70857450
I let your mother do it.

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remember kev? this is him now. feel old yet?

>>70857450
Convinced people who live in Canada are retarded.

>ah yes, i do enjoy being a posting with a vile flag

fuck me i didn't realise how accurately pulp describes growing up british
I'm not even working class and this is all spot on. Big fan.

mm hmm

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450
nice try leaf

Lads, 30 year olds that browse 9gag know age old /int/ memes...

They know about the slav squat, they know footie, they know handegg, they know flags...

I can't...

>>70857421
Isn't it more hygienic to keep it then?

ah... i see how it is

>>70857499
*slowly backs off from you*

>>70857531
>slav squat
tbf doesnt literally everyone east of here squat not just slavs

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>>70857450
WATCH IT LEAFY

>>70857531
>30 year olds that browse 9gag
I thought only kiddies browsed that?

ok... talk to you later

>>70857549
always feel cleaner with them shaved

hard core black nationalist nigerian mate keeps tagging me in pro-trump videos lol
he's a top lad

>Look, mom! I posted it again!

>>70857597
>people with childish political beliefs support trump
who knew

>>70857556
I mean I've met Americans that know about the "outside" and general memes about those areas, or can even find those areas on a map and they cite 9gag....

fuck dogs

*disagrees*

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the allowed movement ranges of 4 generations
i got no (you)s in the last thread but its still interesting

*proves you wrong*

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discuss

>>70857626
no fucking clue what this means you autist

>>70857626
it is interesting thanks lad

*counters your argument by observing that my sexual partner count has nothing to do with the topic at hand*

>>70857619
i feel like youre talking about one specific person you know

>>70857647
the great granddad was allowed to walk six miles by himself, his son was allowed to walk one mile by himself, his daughter half a mile, her son 300 yards.

>>70857646
that arse is flatter than the earth

dumb mapsposter

>>70857646
WAY too much ass

>>70857616
oh fuck off

>>70857659
It's a group and now I know why they like me, they think I browse 9gag.

I just humor they're 5 yr old memes but they think I'm one of them. I tried to explain the internet meme digestive tract and that they are a step a out iFunny basically. But they don't get it...

I just can't humor them anymore

404 Not Fucking Found

>>70857693
ummmmm no why don't you fuck off little brainlet

and i said
LETS ALL MEET UP IN THE YEAR 2000
*looks at watch*
ah well, i've fucked THAT one up havent i haha x

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Thoughts on my waifu?

>>70857671
is this a GCSE maths question?

>>70857717
guarantee i am smarter AND stronger than you

>>70857752
your waifu a shit

drone strikes by intel

>>70857752
*knocks your books out of your hand into a puddle*
fuck off, nerd

>>70857671
Why would you limit yourself to a specific amount of miles? Can they drive anywhere else?

is there anything worse than animeposting ?

>>70857752
who she

>>70857775
Canadians desu

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>>70857775
Croatia

>>70857759
put the goalposts down lad

>>70857775
Islam

>>70857790
Umi from Love Live

what's your favourite big cat lads?
for me it's a tossup between black jaguars and siberian tigers

>>70857775
capitalism

>>70857775
not on here

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>>70857775

>>70857775
tfw no cara gf

>>70857774
it means when they were kids, how far their parents let them walk unattended in their childhood

want a yummy little Syrian refugee gf

Never seen so many divided opinions on a woman like with Cara.

>>70857868
you got a nice bum?

What must it do to a man to swipe by hundreds, even thousands of women on tinder and to receive not even 1 percent reciprocation?

>>70857868
>woman

matched with a bird who's profile says "looking for somebody to kill me"
what did she mean by this dya reckon?

>>70857856
Ah, well it's rotherham so i wouldn't let my kid leave the house

Loved cara even before the ol /brit/

>>70857884
Yeah, what is it to you?

>>70857887
turn him into a trump voter

*makes a smug face into the camera to rapturous applause*

this girl does not look georgian >>70855594

thought they were more asian-looking

>>70857919
uhhh this image not loading all the way for anyone else????

>>70857887
Never used tinder, but if i didn't get a match by the 50th I'd give up

Why would anyone go on tinder to begin with?

People from New England are called New Englanders

>>70857940
giggled irl

>>70857933
get it out then lad, take a pic

>>70857927
Me too. I don't know why people are so basic that the eyebrows are seen as masculine. It's like they don't have an understanding of actually feminine features.

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was the subtext of the jay "ooooh friend" scene from the Inbetweeners that they were gay together? Jay says they met at westham trials but as Simon points out, that "never happened". Why would he lie about how they met?

>>70857985
post butt

>>70857927
Loved you before, during and after this post

>>70857565
Facebookers, old people. I know girls love that shit too, seems all the ones i meet use that site.

>>70857967
Think of it as "passive income", like an investment. It's flexible and not very time intensive.

You set up a property, maintain it and in return you receive a small income for the little time spent.

american football must be the most boring shite ever

>>70858009
No, just no

>>70858040
hmmmmmm

>>70858037
interesting tactically because of the constant breaks
but pretty boring overall

>>70857190
>>70857342
Long distance relationship? How does it work out for you?

>>70858013
Say that to me in chess and not online x

>>70858037
it is. almost as bad as soccer

honestly sleepy but I need to brush my teeth before I go to bed

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http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-38852420
>The number of unexpected patient deaths reported by England's mental health trusts has risen by almost 50% in three years, figures suggest.
Watch yourselves lads.

*sends you on your way*

Use the internet

Recently read a semi-autobiographical novel about a lonely guy falling in love with a woman on the other side of the world over the internet 2bh

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accidentally logged back in when I was drunk last night

>>70858054
I'm tucked up in bed rn sorry :x

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>>70858069
>90 minutes of play versus 13 minutes
hmm struggling to work this one out

what is the worst movie you've ever seen?

Mine is The Chronicles of Narnia

>>70858094
*jogs on*

>>70858102
>accidentally
yeah alright mate

>>70858101
meant for>>70858053

>>70858112
every movie /brit/ as EVER recommended me has been ABSOLUTELY horrid

>>70858115
sorry

>>70858106
Nighty night x

>>70858128
did you watch the K-on movie though?

*tosses a runt*
http://is2.4chan.org/wsg/1486096780828.webm

>>70858166
want to watch a big dirty powerful gorilla fuck my gf

>>70858108
>90 minutes of play
maybe that'll help you work it out

think we scared the Brazilian away =[

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about to spark up

>>70858112
You haven't seen many really bad movies then
>>70858128
Lock, stock and two smoking barrels

>>70858181
it's for the best

Alright lads I have time for ONE quick game

https://en.lichess.org/Wt2o1AVz

>>70858215
knight to d5

>>70858209
would be for the best if you fucked off with him

>>70858208
>lock meme movie made in 1803

binned

>>70858197
start

puffin

boy

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>>70858229
no can do

>deano neighbours banging around and shouting when someone scores in the yankbowl

Fucks sake

>>70858128
creed

>>70858266
the absolute state of the United Queendom

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AAHAHAHAH

OH MY GOSH LADS

WE'VE GOT A DIRTY LITTLE CHEATER ON OUR HANDS

THE SHAME OF IT

ahhh

next game

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>>70857325

>>70858128
brick
y tu mama tambien
primer

>>70858279
delete this mate

Forgot to post the link x

https://en.lichess.org/ssPdOOLj
https://en.lichess.org/ssPdOOLj
https://en.lichess.org/ssPdOOLj

>70858286
least funny post in the thread. won't even honor it with a (You)

>>70858286
anyone else think black twitter humor is a load of shite

>>70858279
>>70858279
what cheat was he using?

>complain that /brit/ recommends horrid movies
>/brit/ then recommends more horrid movies

ah yes, pottery.

>>70858291
AND IT WAS A
Y A N K

>>70858315
It detected that he was using some kind of site or program

>>70858318
maybe you want something with a happy ending and a nice musical number

pssshtt, first day on the chon, huh?

>>70858312
pseudo-(You)s still count

344

thanks for the (You) la

reddit is more insufferable than it ever has been

Bloody hell not having much luck getting a game here

Last yank graciously resigned after his internet turned out to be fucked

https://en.lichess.org/yPonfVSr
https://en.lichess.org/yPonfVSr
https://en.lichess.org/yPonfVSr

why are yanks such cheating scum

*does a sneeze*

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i HATE brits

BBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

snnnnniiiiiiffffffffffff...oh yes my dear....sssnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff....quite pungent indeed...is that....dare I say....sssssssnniff...eggs I smell?......sniff sniff....hmmm...yes...quite so my darling....sniff....quite pungent eggs yes very much so .....ssssssssssssssnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiffffff....ah yes...and also....a hint of....sniff....cheese.....quite wet my dear....sniff...but of yes...this will do nicely....sniff.....please my dear....another if you please....nice a big now....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRAAAAAAAPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPFFFFFF

Oh yes...very good!....very sloppy and wet my dear....hmmmmm...is that a drop of nugget I see on the rim?...hmmmm.....let me.....let me just have a little taste before the sniff my darling.......hmmmmm....hmm..yes....that is a delicate bit of chocolate my dear....ah yes....let me guess...curry for dinner?....oh quite right I am....aren't I?....ok....time for sniff.....sssssnnnnnnniiiiiiiiffffffff.....hmmm...hhhmmmmm I see...yes....yes indeed as well curry......hmmm....that fragrance is quite noticeable....yes.....onion and garlic chutney I take it my dear?.....hmmmmm....yes quite.....

BBBBBBRRRRRRRRPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTT

Oh I was not expecting that…that little gust my dear….you caught me off guard…yes…so gentle it was though…hmmmm…let me taste this little one…just one small sniff…..sniff…ah….ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffffff…and yet…so strong…yes…the odor….sniff sniff…hmmm….is that….sniff….hmmm….I can almost taste it my dear…..yes….just…sniff….a little whiff more if you please…..ssssssnnnnnniiiiiffffffffff…ah yes I have it now….yes quite….hhhhmmmm…delectable my dear…..quite exquisite yes…..I dare say…sniff….the most pungent one yet my dear….ssssnnnnniiiifffffffffffffffffffffff….yes….

>>70858358
you're right this thread is pretty bad tonight

BRAAPposting and mummyposting are the absolute worst

>>70858367
big fan of this copypasta

>>70858361
could absolutely heem you

>>70858386
don't ever reply to me again if you value your slender neck

>>70858390
ballbusting posting was the absolute best

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does any of you go to Hogwarts?

>tfw Poland doesn't have a school of witchcraft

i hope my gimmick gets nominated for 'best gimmick of 2017'

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>>70858367

>go out on tinder date
>girl significantly less attractive than anyone Ive dated before
>think oh well, she seems pretty fun
>have a great time with her
>mad at myself for being shallow enough to consider avoiding her due to her looks
>message her again to hangout
>she says shed rather just be friends

fucking hell. destroyed my confidence. literally thought I might be out of her league

just been sacked lads
t. tom brady

>>70858433
good post desu

>>70858433
wish someone would sack my bollocks

fuck off we voted brexit
You know who you are, shan't be directing this at you

it's a hot one

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>>70858428
fucking ouch

need to clubber lang somebody

absolutely fucking criminal im walking about in this kind of shape and not killing runts on the daily

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You lads are such a waste of time sometimes that I don't know why I bother

Egrom

>>70858477
I'll fucking clobber you mate

>king developed, gg
laughed at this

>>70858477
I'd give it about 2 minutes before I beat you

this aussie runt had better not post another link if he knows what's good for him

>>70858541
cheater

*cracks knuckles*

i'm warning you m8...

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i love everyone in this thread

especially you

>tfw thought I was normie and handsome
>am actually just a failed normie and probably ugly

haha

I need a bf to cuddle with

https://en.lichess.org/1R47XHT8
https://en.lichess.org/1R47XHT8
https://en.lichess.org/1R47XHT8
https://en.lichess.org/1R47XHT8

>>70858575
post pic and i'll rate

t. expert on what women find attractive

Monday tomorrow :)

>>70858501
>>70858565
>>70858573
I will cut you down in instants

I can send a flurry of head body combos at a rate of 7 knockout punches per second with ruthlessly efficiency

be wanred

plan to improve /brit/, lads.

Stage one:
>ban all yanks
>ban all pseudo-yanks

Stage two:
>allow bruces in on a case-by-case basis
>a banter test will be applied to make sure they will not be detrimental to the mood of the general

Stage 3
>all sad virginposters are weeded out and deported to /r9k/
>all quasinormies get told to FO
>all gimmicks go through a democratic approval test (no more BRAAAAAP posting, for e.g.)

Stage 4
>a general that is the perfect place for normal, upstanding members of society like us.
>tasteful slag posting is still allowed.

>>70858610
you could improve /brit/ if u shut the fuck up

>>70858610
>>70858610
yeah

desu just put me in a cage with yanny for 90 seconds an he will never be the same again the fucking rat

>>70858610
spacker

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>>tasteful slag posting is still allowed.

>>70858610
smeg me arse, la! i spell colour with an u!

Just got in from the club, feeling pretty fucking spaced out atm lads.

>>70858661
no more of this bollocks in my perfect /brit/ either.

want to learn a second language but honestly cba to spend hours and hours reading books and watching movies/tv all while studying grammar.

hope you enjoy this blogpost xx

post https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e92PetkkPvc

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i could verbally, physically and mentally heem any yank itt

Fucking hate dogs

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>Fucking hate dogs

>>70858741
'sheed

gives you a standing ovation for 20 minutes

Feeling very transient, as though my body and mind are poised to physically disappear at any time

Absolutely HATE bacon

>>70858741
t. Rasheed al-Paki Islamisbad

>>70858741
Almost forgot about banning shitskins. Thanks Abdul

>>70858780
'd

>>70858741

t. mohammed akbar

>>70858780

>>70858741
>>70858780
t. abdulaziz al terroristi mohammed bin laden

>>70858780
bizzaro vegan rorke

>>70858610
fascist

can't stand alcohol

super bowl is close now lads

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the absolute STATE of this thread

can't stand

>>70858833
delete this image mate

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just got some benzos lads. about to have some good times

i hate dogs and bacon and i'm WASP as fuck

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wn5Xtymkl3U

i got ansiety

>>70858849
benzos never really seemed to do much for me
only had klonopin tho

>>70858849
he could've had a pretty good life. was handsome and doing well at uni

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does anyone in /brit/ play WoW? i need a friend...

anime

There are people on here that play WoW and LoL? It's bad enough that you like anime. Maybe I should stop coming here

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>tfw you have AGP and just to be used as a fuck you by a real man

babestation

i've been playing WoW for over ten years.. it's a hard habit to drop

>>70858917
Yeah but you literally post from your phone

>>70858933
*noises*

>>70858934
i always found it boring as fuck after level cap

>>70858917
I dont like anime but i like LoL :-)

>>70858933
Sister's ex got in trouble for ringing babestation off mum's housephone once

>>70858973
why

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IMDB gives shit movies high ratings and good movies low ratings

normies don't know jack about movies desu

my dad calls my girlfriend "shit-for-brains" behind her back

should i tell her?

>>70859039
...no?

>>70858941
https://is2.4chan.org/gif/1486171499493.webm

call my son's girlfriend "shit for brains" haha what a laugh
dumb bitch

>>70859026
there are different categories of normies you mong.

plenty of them actually have good taste and avoid capeshit

>>70859047
AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>70859007
£2 a minute probably

>>70859039
....uhhhhh no dude?

>>70859047
https://is.4chan.org/gif/1486171499493.webm

>>70859053
t. normie defence force

>>70859078
AROOOOOOOOOOOOO

>>70859026
you could call them normative statements

>>70859078
your clitoris is the only thing not showing mish

crazy play in the super bowl

england might tie it up and bring it home

>>70859007
Premium rate number la

wish i was a saudi prince

>>70859131
fuck me lid
what a catch

Yeah, I killed a CIA nigger with my car in 1999, score one for the good guys.

mate told me he was proposing to his gf today.

they are usually really active on social media and would've certainly posted something about it if she said yes

starting to think she didnt. im not that good enough mates with him so dont wanna ask

>>70859206
wrong board, you want /g/

>>70859217
>they are usually really active on social media
fucking normie scum

holy shit lads
handegg is good stuff

tie game in the super bowl

>>70859217
nth for this >>70859241

>tfw tuned out of the big game a while ago
>now tied game

>12 minutes of actual play
screeching

>hey baby oh ah is playing
>crowd isnt singing along

fucking yanks

>>70859111
it became obvious IMDB gives high ratings to movies if they're given money to

when suicide squad got an 8.9 i knew it was all bullshit

>>70859297
nice normative statement you normie twat

>>70859310
your parents are normies

check your privilege

>EXTRA TIME
>EXTRA TIME
>EXTRA TIME

handegg is shit

>>70859371
i agree. this game has had a few fun minutes though

>>70859371
you know the ball isn't shaped like an egg right

wish someone would crack my balls like eggs

>>70859438
more like an egg than a ball tbqh

>>70859052
get out gramps

can't believe the patriots just won this one. we were winning 21-0

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que es esto?

>choking this bad

Pats win

aaaahahaha
even new england>rest of america

Reminder that Algeria is 10x the size of the UK

>>70859480
>we

Trainspotting
Redpill me.

>>70859561
Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin can openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed-interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suit on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life . . . But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life: I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you've got heroin?

>>70859506
das ist ein kinder surprise

>>70859561
above average movie which has been overplayed on terrestrial (freeview) tv during the early 2000s-2010. Due to this, the children of this decade now reminisce about and hype this movie as if it was something it is not.

did the man catch the ball?

can we get a big hearty found of a applause for the man, for his efforts in throwing the egg?

>>70859613
>Tall and good looking

this your latest persona, lisicki?

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good lad

do you even read the books I read

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not watching this hand egg malarkey

took heroin last night

>>70859687
grim

>>70859670
are you og desklad?

>>70859709
aye its him

>>70859670
good dlad

>>70859701
it was pretty nice, think i'll start taking it to help me come down off meth

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>>70859709
yep. I'm still alive.

>>70859653
me on the bottom

>>70859729
it is quite nice. know you're taking the piss now though.

>>70859729
but what will you use to come down off heroin?

1. poochie needs to be louder, angrier, and have access to a time machine

2. when poochie is not on screen, all the other characters should be asking, "where's poochie?"

>>70859750
cobra venom, duh

>>70859750
meth

ffs /sp/ is literally unusable atm

my kinofalcon just killed himself, how am i supposed to get past the no singles policy now? i want to see john wick chapter 2 but i don't want to have to show up 4 hours earlier and pay my way through in the popcorn mines

>>70859744
good shit
still with that old bird?

GREATEST
OF
ALL
TIME

>>70859641
not lisicki

>>70859821
>>70859821
>>70859821
>>70859821
>>70859821
>>70859821