/brit/

It's hydromatic

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>click "I have a TV licence"
>i don't actually have a tv licence

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the gf and I

hey now

oh yeah

i feel it

baby

>e-sprouts paused for 90 minutes

Is that the STEM aspie that made his own world with Crusher and Troi as his waifus?
That was a great episode

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Just copped this new phone lads

Thoughts?

i am the best poster in brit

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>>70267720
paradise

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Look at my doggos

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>£1.2bn (billion) extension

londoners are spoilt

The Farty Shit Poosident of the Poonited Sharts of Arsemerica is now settled into the Oval Orifice

>>70267720
>Computer, disengage safety protocols
MADMAN!

think im dying

>>70267818
ah yes, barratt land, home

>>70267815
>windows ce
the nostalgia is kicking in hard

>>70267825
would love a doggo but probably cruel to leave one alone while i'm at work all day desu

redpill me on the taking of pelham 123

DOES ANYONE REMEMBER THE FUCKING CuCKIO MEME

>>70267851
tfl are pretty good desu
can just turn up to a station and the trains arrive every couple of minutes

they just need to scrap the drivers

>>70267818
>buildings age and become weathered
>trees planted

within 10 years this place will look great

utterly desperate for a 1980s eurodance dutch gf
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dVpaK3NGtI

>>70267815
it's well weapon

2 things i need to do this year
1. stick my knob in a girl's fanny
2. ol' 'cide

>>70267910
Cunt off. Spoilt parasite

cannot wait for crossrail

>>70267964
in that order?

>tfw red head with blue eyes
>both recessive genes
>extremely rare combination

probably explains why i'm a beta though lmao

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imagine being a young attractive smart woman who travels the world with her 6'8'' artist chad husband

ugh

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makes me ill

>>70267851

remember that spastic who used to demand a subway for Manchester

>a higher percentage of people speak English in the Netherlands than in Canada

Seriously makes me think

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufGAn6ddT20
feeling wistful lads

strangest thing about the jo cox situation was her husband didn't seem to care that she had been murdered. in fact he almost seemed happy about it

>>70267946
>Released 1994

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>>70267965
i don't live in london
tfl's funding comes from people paying to use the service

>>70268028
magnanimous

Yeah, the bf is being a dick.

The prohibition of MDMA and hallucinogenic mushrooms restricts cognitive liberty

>>70267851
Have you ever used Clapham Junction?

It's a clusterfuck, those stations are necessary

>>70268000
it actually sounds terrible

>>70268000
what the fedora is this shite

>>70268028
She seemed like a really mouthy sort. Probably glad to get a bit of peace and quiet

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>>70267818
think that's bad?

feast your eyes

once went on the tube for no reason

was genuinely just bored

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im absolutely howling lads

ive found an isolated jewish community on the edge of the metropolitan avenue

lost my shit when i clocked moishe avenue

pic related its the german runt with his mummy on their way to temple

>>70268066
of course it does

>>70268067
r/writing

>>70267771
Prepare for 'gitmo

>>70268034

"I Can't Stand It!" is the song recorded by the Dutch dance artist Twenty 4 Seven. It was released in late 1989

>>70268078
>Wales

Hardly a fair comparison

>>70267959
>remain had one of their own killed
>still lost anyway
howling

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBluYsydAVc

>america

subaru ride thru the mist with no music

>>70268085
>trees

I told you. jews are intelligent

>>70268010
Remember that spastic who said any investment outside Londonistan would bankrupt the UK? God what a thick cunt.

>>70268000
cant believe people like these exist

>>70268085
heh

it's nice that canada is a liberal country where people like that can live in peace

>>70268010
Glasgow has one desu

>>70268083
some guy was walking up and down my train once begging for money with some shitty story about his situation

he was getting fivers all over the place, must have been rolling in it at the end of the day

>>70268122
>mtv
shan't

>>70268123
going crazy pull up inna mercedes

>>70268078
this looks fine. i don't understand you guys. you call that grim but i'm sure it's perfectly safe and has clean water and fast internet

>>70268041
>Less than 50% funded by fares
Yeah lad, so true! TfL is definitely good value for money for all of Britain.
I actually wouldn't mind if other rail networks in Britain got similar funding per customer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGbC5j4pG9w

really makes you think

trying my best and having some fun

>>70267946
>not that girl from 2unlimited

>>70268138

It won't bankrupt us but it is indeed a waste of money

Everyone should move down south, no point propping up crumbling industrial wastelands

>>70268158
Once had a guy get on, scream at his Cheeseburger for five minutes, stamp on it then call a black woman a spook and run off the train

spend too much time here and i've started using /brit/isms in real life. haha what am i like

>>70268158
should've gave him a little something

>>70268041
>Other sources of cash

Like what? They dealing on the side or something?

when
does
the
fucking
DOTES
start again
jesus christ

>>70268010
Yeah Britain, london should get every piece of the pie. Twat.

>>70268222
what did he say to the cheeseburger?

>>70268174
call me maybe hit me on my fb

>>70268227
nah, he'd obviously paid to get inside a station somewhere, he was probably just one of them professional beggars because he can make more doing that than a min wage job

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>>70268142
>>70268130
look at where the community is

i swear the kikes have it nestled away like this so they can nonce the children in peace

im calling it camp david

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>>70268212

hello where are the dutch gf

>>70268041
Jesus Christ I always believed the meme Londoners push that tfl funds itself, didn't realise fares made up this little

Thought it would be 95% the way you cunts go on

wish the entire country used oyster cards for its rail and bus network

imagine that. one card for any bus or train

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqi5rfjoolY
2d ch00n

>computer, create 1 million self-aware hitlers
>disengage safety protocols

>>70268261
No idea, I think it was French. He looked Algerian

>>70268283
doesn't she have some chinky sugardaddy

business idea: take a welding course and a scuba course and become an underwater welder and make a ton of money

>>70268295
they do that in Korea
I'd really like to do that

>>70268295
fuck that, wish they just used normal contactless cards like at any other place of transaction

>>70268217
You really are the most boring shitposter in this general.

You truly believe your own dogma and your smugness can be felt through the screen.

>>70268314
was it maccas or burger king?

>>70268295
Who the fuck still uses an oyster card. All the public transport works with contactless debit cards now

>>70268295
same desu
hate people who get on and spend like 5 minutes getting change out to pay for their tickets

even just accepting contactless cards would be good

>manchester gets £1.5 billion tram extension funded by London
>wwaaaaaahh it's not enough

>>70268327
good idea
just don't die

>>70268237
>he doesn't slam crack and heroin that he buys from transport for london

amateur

>>70268295
we have that, its p neat desu

>>70268297
be honest mate have you ever had a wank to one of these drawings

>>70268278
dont adress me, please learn how to dress please

>>70268295
>Get on commuter train at rush hour
>Accidentally scan card twice
>Bank account charged for 15,000 GPB

>>70268356
Maccies

OFFICIAL THREAD SONG
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAGS8UL9b6A

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LS5qhnc1yMk
garridge 'ouse

>>70268357
still get amazed at the fact i can put my phone against a reader and pay for things

>>70268078
grim.jpg

holy fuck turn on the shia stream lmao

>>70268367
that's half the point lad

hey, wanna get an ice cream sometime?

which do you prefer, magnum or the 'netto?

>>70268295
denmark has that

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hmmmmmm

>>70268327
According to the ocean thread on /x/ that had a oil rig dive welder posting, you will see a lot of weird shit down there, like a dinosaur.

>>70268402
he have chips as well?

Just bought a Doro EasiFone lads

>>70268405
>1969

shit didn't realise its that old. pretty good tune for something from the shitty sixties

>>70268295
all of quebec uses one transit card

feels good man

>>70268185
>and fast internet
now you're just being rude

>>70268407
Does that work instantly? Those apple pay type apps look like they'd take 10 seconds to work and would just piss you off

getting my daily dose of casey neistat and ... casey neistat

>>70268295
That would be like the rest of the fucking world.
How simple, a unified travel card, like they have everywhere else.
But you know, only London matters!

>>70268237
Normally fines from Network rail

>>70268253
Labour fuck us over because we always vote Labour, the Tories fuck us over because we never vote Labour.
I'm actually thankful for the SNP and anticipating UKIP making gains

>>70268398
how would you scan it twice?
the card barriers will be outside the station, so you just scan your card, go in, get on the train, get off at your station and scan it again

>>70268494
use android pay and all you have to do is unlock your phone and put it against the reader, takes hardly any time to accept it, probably the same/faster as a regular contactless card

Ilkeston>London tbqh

>>70268497
cannot stand him for no reason at all

>>70268519
Not all stations have barriers.

>>70268443
bought a magnum out of impulse yesterday and it was fucking 2.60 or something

got an arse
got a willy

what now

>>70268342
I don't have a contactless card and it's super annoying
I don't live anywhere near London
Just being able to tap my card at Tesco or McDonalds would be great

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>>70268078
>A549
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A549
HMMMM...

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the endz

>>70268394
I've wanked to a lot of things, so yes.

>>70268398
>>70268553
you can get that refunded on the tfl website desu

>>70268342
They do, in London at least. TFL even automatically applies the same daily/weekly spending caps as an oyster card

Oyster is now obsolete

>>70268563
put yer willy in yer arse

cannot stop farting

@70268360

Not going to fall for your b8 this time.

>>70268554
what are you doing buying ice cream in january you mad thing

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haha

trams are fucking useless if they aren't those old timey ones you hop on the back of while its moving

>>70268553
well if they implemented a national travel card scheme, they would need to install barriers at every station
my local station is one without barriers

>>70268493
even the most rural parts of yankland has fiber optic

reckon the UK is no different

>>70268569
>I don't have a contactless card and it's super annoying

Go into your branch and ask for one if your current account qualifies (it should, most do). I was skeptical but it's fucking great

If you could eliminate one gimmick from here what would it be?

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if you don't remember this livery then you're underage

>>70268604
i had a gnaw for it

>turbonormie brother and his gf invite me to brunch at some hipster place in the city
>place is packed with qt girls and their bfs
>all happy, all content
>literally all of them had sex the night before
>now they're just enjoying each other's company, another comfy lazy sunday
>i've never had a gf, never kissed a girl
>getting older, hair falling out, the already dim hope grows dimmer by the day
hope i don't wake up tomorrow

>>70268629
>reckon the UK is no different
looooooooooool

>>70268575
me on the bench checking if i need to buy tampons

>>70268621
It's literally impossible to monitor though. That's why they don't have barriers currently, because people would just jump them and most stations would have to be radically redesigned because they were built before this was an issue.

>>70268611
They're kind of useful
In the summer, the Promenade in Blackpool gets super packed with tourists and shit, and the tram just zooms past
problem is that the tram is only along the seafront, so it's not that practical if you want to go in town

business idea: sell anime snacks to neets on chinese cartoon forums

>>70268611
ehh

manchester's tram network would be alright if they had more wheels and an actual turning circle so they didn't screech louder than a 142

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>>70268575
the endz

>>70268629
You reckon wrongly

Plan is to have 95% of the UK on "superfast" broadband (defined as at least 10MB) by 2020.

know someone who won't get online banking because he doesn't trust banks and has to do everything by going in to a branch or by post

>>70268629
you're wrong

once went to south london and they had bus stops with massive android screens where you could check a map or plan a journey, it was mental

>>70268497
be sure to leave an angry comment about cnn

>>70268621
Mine is without barriers, but most journeys involve at least one station having barriers.
So it would still work, if you got on without scanning and got off at a station with barriers it would be akin to trying to ride the train without a ticket.

And if you go between two stations without barriers odds are you wouldn't have paid for a ticket anyway

>girl you haven't seen for a few years pops up on your Facebook newsfeed
>She's got a baby

This is becoming increasingly common, not a huge fan

he

will not

divide

us

>>70268636
Really?
I'm on a student current account with Santander and got a new card in July and they gave me a normal one, not a contactless card

>>70268611
the ones in Notts are alright, but way more expensive and more inconvenient than just getting a bus
so actually quite shit

>>70268515
ENP when? Someone has to stand up for the ignored millions against the parasitic caliphate.

>>70268688
>>70268711
>>70268719

what the fuck is your gubbamint spending your tax moneys on then

>>70268694
loads of london stations don't have staff during most times because they have a standardised automated system

most people won't jump barriers but the people that do, do it anyway even with staff around

>>70268706
the houses look very comfy

'gon gets really mad in his latest episode

>>70268768
electronic london bus stops

>>70268753
live your own life lad

if i was you i'd drop facebook immediately

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He will nut inside us
He will nut inside us
He will nut inside us

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>>70268000
>reading le 'dit

getting a bit bored of this 'mick

>>70268768
cocaine and nonce rings

>>70268824
girl on the left is not white

>>70268768
>Muslims
>Foreigner gibs me dats
>MUH NHS
>London

Infrastructure spending is unpopular because the results normally occur when your party is out of power.

>>70268762
UKIP is our best bet desu.

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haha look at this bird anon!

>>70268756
http://www.santander.co.uk/uk/contactless-payments

You can ring them up and ask them to replace your card with a contactless one.

holy shit theres loads of people on hewillnotdivide.us

>>70268790
Yeah but I'm thinking of rural stations and the sprawling northern stations where there are barely any people around. Bit different from doing it in a crowded tube station. I agree a universal card system would be a good idea, but getting fares down should be the priority at the moment.

the railways are a disgrace

>>70268854
Mexicans and arabs will soon be counted as white, just as Italians, etc once were not

>>70268854
bit of an emperor's new clothes type situation tbf

>>70268824
why does every upper middle class girl with dark hair think she is a kardashian

don't get game of thrones at all, i mean it's such fedora tier nerdshit and yet the normies all love it. odd case that.

>>70268858
*slams copy of The Art of the Deal down on it*
hm

post your postcode

M20 here

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love Francis Bacon's works

went to his studio and all. saw his masterpieces in person. inspired as fuck

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Perfection doesn't exi-

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guided busways are far more efficient than trams

>>70268940
TW2 2bh

>>70268940
FY8

>>70268768
Successive governments have thrown tens and tens of millions at our internet companies who always give big promises but nothing ever improves.

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ah yes

>>70268940
kt12

>>70268999
are they?

>>70268940
L A 1 2
A
1
2

>>70268854

she's half iranian, quarter white, quarter black

>>70268922
Nerd culture is now mainstream. We need more bullies. Without bullies the nerds rose up and took over. It's like in nature, the wolves keep the deer population in check so they don't eat all the grass. Well now the grass is popular culture and they ate it all. So every fucking thing is comic books and fantasy and science fiction.

>>70268940
M21

>>70268940
SW1

>>70268940
L17

>>70269022
what's your point mate?

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsOW_sBFwBo

REMINDER that Baghdad looks better than loads of cities in the UK

>>70267771
did this and then got a letter through the door saying they were watching me

>>70268515
>That would be like the rest of the fucking world.
not the whole world, just first world countries, like Denmark and the Netherlands

>>70268921
because they're vapid WHORES ROOOOOOOOO

>>70268940
used to live in E14

>>70269095
looks like tottenham

>>70268999
???
it's literally just an expensive road that cars can't drive on

so is "nutted but she still sucking" a good feel or a bad feel?

t. virgin

>>70268940
BT17

>>70269160
no it doesn't you gimp

>>70268940
BN1

>>70268323
yeh me

>>70269115
netherlands and denmark are quite small and very compact, so that system works easier there
but having one card system for the whole country is a legit good idea. don't see why it isn't applied

>used to live in E14

aka I wanted cheap rent but my house was demolished for a luxury skyscarper

>>70269173
try wanking then after you cum keep rubbing your bellend and tell me if it feels good

>>70269173
Extremely Intense and not great

>tfw parents have a house in greater london that has more than doubled in price to >£750k
>tfw won't get it as inheritance as they will probably sell it and downgrade before they die

>>70269173
depends on how it's done tbqh. If she's just playing around with the head with her tongue it kind of feels bad, if she deepthroats it's glorious.

>>70269022
Shrek?

>>70269082
alri ther la?

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wish i was a yank

wish my ancestors weren't cowards who stayed on this shitty rainy island instead of emigating

Ah yes... the infamous 'flu'

>>70269228
i managed to chain-wank once when i was like 14, couldn't do it now though

converting to islam lads

>>70268563
take pics

>>70269275
FOPY

>>70269275
literally same. But I probably wouldn't exist tbf, doubtful the ancestors of both my parents would move to the same place in yankland and my parents would meet each other and have me

don't understand how a girl can be so attracted to a boy that she literally will put his willy in her mouth and drink his cum. it's just so far outside my experience that it seems alien, like trying to imagine living in ancient rome or something like that.

>>70269246
watched a programme where a couple bought a house in a village for £125k and it became part of london years on and sold for £1.2 million

>>70269246
you never know lad, they might both die tragically in a car crash

>>70269220
nah i lived in a new build luxury flat

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cant wait for match of the day lads xx

>>70267910
This Tbh

>>70269349
me neither

want to watch it with me?

>>70269329
>it's just so far outside my experience
yeah sure mate

I don't like trump
how do I spread this message to as many people as possible

drugs are bad lads

>>70269328
too logical

>>70269329
i know a guy who has the exact same logic
understand how someone could think like that but i dont think oral sex is a big deal

>>70269275
yeah but you'd have to have your dick skin cut off at birth

>>70269367

join rabb.it/haydy about 10 mins before it starts ill stream it xx

How do you go about relating with normies lads?

>>70269379
go to the museum of moving image in new york and mutter "he will not divide us"

>>70269379
walk around london and shout at other people who don't like trump that you don't like trump

>>70269379
wear a hat and go outside

what you mustn't do is vote against him

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reminder pyongyang, north korea looks better than most northern cities

>>70268028
Yes it was very strange, milked it for his 15 minutes of fame

>>70268069
Funny post

>>70269402
>i dont think oral sex is a big deal
you walked into the wrong thread normie boy
*puts a finger in your chest*

>the former substitute drama teacher Justin Trudeau

america is the best country in the world if you're rich. if not, australia or nz are your best bets

>>70269448
looks like legoland

Sometimes crease when I remember there are literally grown men who have never even kissed a girl let alone shagged one

Literally incredulous

>>70269082
went to st margys me la

everything built in the 90s is utterly dire

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>>70269379
just tell 2 friends lad. and then they tell 2 friends. and they tell 2 friends. and they tell 2 friends.

>>70269423
no i meant come round to my house and watch it

my vanilla ice creams melted and now im pretending im slurping up a nice big puddle of cum x

>my surname has literally been in this country for 1000 years
>still feel rootless
ah yes

>>70269474
i mean the act itself
it's just a girl putting a willy in her mouth for a few minutes and moving around it

>>70269497

will i make it in time?

t. central birmingham

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Reminder that Nanping, a 5th tier city in China, looks better than most Northern cities

>shagged 10 girls
>still feel like i should be a virgin

>>70269424
basically i just steal other people's jokes and observations about sex/relationships and pass them off as my own. so even though i've never had a gf the norms will think i'm normal too.

sieben sieben eins zwei

>>70269448
Pyongyang: planned economy

The north: thatcherism

>>70269541
i'm taking the piss but you could because i live in solihull

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>t. central birmingham

>>70269448
>streets are all empty
hmmmm

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>>70269478
being poor here isn't so bad either

>>70269448
Pyongyang is their showpiece–city, what else do they have to impress any outsiders?
The rest of D.P.R.K. is likely grim.

>>70269558
underrated banger 2bh

arrrrrr she wants her architecture inspired by selfridges brum

>>70269568
alri callum

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>>70269176
>west belfast

>>70269597
>>70269582
>>70269560
>>70269482
see
>>70269543

if you haven't watched every year of eurovision since 2004 I don't consider you as human

>>70269448
>>70269543
just goes to show how much a planned economy can do for you

Bf's still being a dick.

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Computer, convert /brit/ to fight club, and disengage safety protocols

Being a dick to my bf

Reminder that you could live like a king in the 3rd world

>>70269546
same, cept I almost always get pulled than do the pulling. Not shy or nervous but if im on a night out or at a party I rarely think

"corr I'd really love to woo a lass and take her home tonight"

I'm more focused on getting messy, probably turned down like 5-10x more guaranteed sex opportunities than ive taken too

>>70269560
germcuck btfo

europe had a very comfy/interesting aesthetic 90s-early 00s

>>70269655
this 3bh

Bf's still shoving his dick up my arse.

>>70268940
i'm from b19 not a farmyard

>>70269448
>6-lane highways when less than 1% of the population owns a car

howling

>>70269558
vier fünf sechs
uno
ichni san chi

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>>70269568

im joking too you silly sausage what a fun interaction we've just had xxx

>>70269700
>I'm more focused on getting messy
yeah same
ONS' are a bit shit imo, would rather just have fun than worrying about pulling because it just leaves you disappointed and pretty desperate looking

>>70269530
i understand the mechanics of it, it's the mindset that underlies it. i also understand that people sometimes walk into schools and shoot dozens of strangers, just walking into a school with a gun and pulling the trigger is not physically demanding and anyone could do it but the mentality is to me inscrutable. same thing with sex, i mean most women would dry heave at the thought of even kissing a guy like me but they'll gladly but some guy's pissrod in their mouths? can't fathom it.

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new build flats going up in Berlin

>>70269686
You mean like Thailad actually does

>>70269700
>cept I almost always get pulled than do the pulling
HOW do you do this
you must be very good looking tbf

>thailand
extra bug 10 baht

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>turbonormie brother and his gf invite me to brunch at some hipster place in the city
>place is packed with qt girls and their bfs
>all happy, all content
>literally all of them had sex the night before
>now they're just enjoying each other's company, another comfy lazy sunday
>i've never had a gf, never kissed a girl
>getting older, hair falling out, the already dim hope grows dimmer by the day
hope i don't wake up tomorrow

>>70269747
Disgusting

>>70269747
>not pictured: the immigrants camping outside

>>70269747
looks like some thing art-deco inspired from 2008

when you take LSD it's possible to remember the pain of being circumcised

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hmmm

>>70269747
how many aspiring techno djs in there

>>70269746
don't you want to get your pissrod in a girls mouth?

>>70269765
Thailad is on the run from the nonce squad

>>70269650
P.R. China is not in NoKo.
It has capitalism as part of its economy since Dung Xiao Ping.

>>70269746
and you'd lick out a girl that you found attractive

it's the same

>>70269810
>based dad didn't let dr. shekelberg anywhere near my willy
good feel

>>70269491

Me

>>70269820
fake news

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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4146018/Police-officer-injured-shooting-Belfast.html

>>70269796
just get tinder lad

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>tfw to intelligent to conform to mainstream architectural styles

>>70269720
pics

>>70269494
Including me

>>70269747
would sit outside on a table and parasol drinking lager for hours under the sun after watching the early footy and having the rest of the day to kill/10

to be honest with you

>>70269796
>never kissed a girl
How does this even happen? I'm not good looking guy but I've still shagged a fair amount of girls.

>>70269820
do not understand why these pics are such shit quality

*repaves the area outside the towns main train station and installs some modern benches whilst the rest of the place is a crumbling shithole*

ah this should surely distract them from the fact that london gets billions

>>70269799
as far as i know they're camped out in tempelhof, pretty far from there

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>tfw to intelligent to take off

>>70269838
the point is i can't understand girls finding me attractive, it seems literally impossible

>>70269765
living in his sordid nonce pit is not living like a king lad. unless you're a nonce i suppose.

>>70269742
>ONS' are a bit shit imo

yep, there is mulitple aspects I don't like about them and usually the only upside is sex. So more often than not the scales of my brain tip in the balance against it.

>>70269767
honestly I'm not, I'm decent looking but i am by no means a good looking person that you would notice and I put little effort in my appearance, I'm a pretty good dancer though and girls seem to like that. Also I'm quite confident and I don't wanna use the word alpha because I don't think it fits but I deffo fit a leader role in my freinds group so perhaps that pays off??

if I want to suck 2017 dicks for 2017 I need to suck 5.526027387 a day

>>70269867
>tfw to smart to make something that looks nice

>>70269919
>>70269919
>>70269919
>>70269919
New one lads

>>70269860
>northern ireland
>muslim attack
you fucking retard

>>70269888
*pedestrianises your town centre*

>>70269860
IRA aren't Irish