/brit/

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SUPERB edition

nth for the correct (Australian) pronunciation of vitamin

the vi rhymes with eye

IT WAS ALL A DREAM

>>70115861
Quite a yank way of saying it

cara

>>70115817
pls put big ed in terms an americhant would understand
what is the US equivalent to big ed?

>>70115817
>Billboards featuring two girls in hijabs are set to be installed around the country after an Australia Day sign was taken down in Melbourne following complaints it featured Muslims
>"I'm overwhelmed and just incredibly heartened I guess because it feels like sometimes the bastards are winning," she said. "Then when this happens you just think, 'No they're not, there's a whole lot of really good people out there'.
ah yes
wonder how long before it's officially renamed Invasion Day

imagining a pretty girl that appreciates me and likes spending time with me

>>70115905
At least you got a lot of imagination

>>70115905
I had one of those (a gf) for 5 years

>>70115887
Someone who ran for office, was ironically popular because they were weird and funny, then got absolutely walloped and resigned

Just realised that I am EXACTLY the type of bloke who women don't really want to be with, but will begrudgingly settle for at the age of 32 having themselves realised that the types of bloke they want to be with have no interest in being with them, and that they don't really have a good career, so what they need is a steady dependable boring bloke with a good job. You're probably that sort of bloke too.

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>>70115877
>if it's not british it must be american!

howling at your binary fucking noggins

>>70115903
never really understood why they want it renamed to invasion day desu

it wasn't an invasion at all

>>70115937
I can't actually imagine it

London smells like sewage

Are pensions a meme?

Every month ~£250 goes into my workplace pension. That includes my employer's 9% contribution. Is this definitely the right thing for me to be doing?

>>70115949
um don't think you asked the aboriginals if they wanted to stop throwing spears at each other hun, that's an invasion and illegal occupation x

Jeremy Corbyn

>>70115970
Yes, it's free money
however you should also have a savings account you can withdraw from, too

>>70115945
>dependable bloke with a good job
>You're probably that sort of bloke too
don't think so matey

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Lads haha

>>70110468
>>70110468
>>70110468

Get in here, having a ball lads!

>>70115964
so does New York City it also has a layer of soot covering everything and is absolutely teeming with minorities

>>70115964
*unzips Paris*

>>70115970
I get taxed 10% for social security even though I only made $5,000 last year. It won't even exist for me to use in 50 years anyway

Feels great

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>all friends are successful
>im still a neet

>>70115970
>implying our generation will ever retire

I put my money into a funeral plan. Funerals rise in price 6% every year. That's better than any interest rate we'll ever get again.

i miss miliband

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the depression isn't going away haha

>>70116003
looks like the ex gf

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>>70115887
trained killer who can't eat sandwiches properly

>>70115970
Pensions are good to have but you should also be investing in mutual and index funds

>>70115999
Good to hear.

Yeah I do have savings also. Every month I put ~£400 into a cash ISA but the interest rate is absolutely dire (0.5% or some shit).

Then I wonder if I would be better served putting a larger proportion of that money into the pension pot but then obviously then it's trapped away until I'm at least 55 (assuming I don't kill myself before then). But I guess it's useful to have a big pot of liquid, accessible money early on for house deposits etc.

>>70116006
New York deserves another 9/11

>>70116011
>gypsy filled pickpocket "city" of piss

>>70116022
don't isolate yourself, bud

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>>70116034

wish I lived in England so I could have a cool nickname like Big Gaz

Very very strange.

Ever notice how all politicians and business leaders pay homage to Angela Merkel in the exact same way they do Israel?

glad maggie closed down those mines. The only people who cared were runts who had an IQ of 4 and were incapable of doing anything other than working in a mine. pathetic.

>>70116022
aim lower

their "success" is probably managing a sports direct

>>70116050
alri Rasheed

>>70116059
You're a Big Gaz

>>70116046
>house deposits
You got a help-to-buy ISA yet?

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>>70116060
>Angler Merkel

>>70116046
Might want to look into a non-taxed retirement account. They usually invest in mutual funds/stocks/bonds and return 4-5% a year.

If you withdraw before 65 you get taxed on it though. In America we call it an IRA.

>>70116035
I've considered it and know it is sensible but then I have also heard that it doesn't make sense to tie money up in investments when you aren't properly set up yet. Like I still live at home, I don't own property, I don't even have a mortgage, my current job is more of a job than a career etc.

Investments feel like more of a long term thing once you are firmly in your rut in life.

>>70115984
no, i mean like the entire idea of an invasion is that it is premeditated to be an invasion. the entire definition of the word is based around a clear objective to entire enemy territory and attempt to sieze control.

the british landed and the mistreatment arose from there. they didn't land with the intention of fucking them up, and phillip made the command to leave them the fuck alone and let them live peacefully.

Lads. I've got 45k to my name but no formal qualifications. Does that mean I have no chance of moving abroad?

>>70116060

Merkel is a saint for standing up against the tyrannical will of the people

I work in a bank and get a staff bond at 4%. Can only put £500 a month in tho

>>70116060
Germany unironically controls the EU.
If you don't suck her cock, your country's bond rate will rise 50%.

>>70116096
I think I worked it out one day, the maximum benefit you get from a help-to-buy ISA is something like £3,000. That's if you max your contributions and keep it open for the max length of time. I think I can live with paying £3k less on a deposit.

>FOB
yeah

>>70116120
You could move to Switzerland and then off yourself.

>>70116131
yeah but I mean even Americans, even American Republicans for the most part all praise Merkel.

>>70116104
Lad you're absolutely wrong about that

It's never too early to start investing money
Compound interest is the 8th wonder of the modern world

Keep an emergency fund (6 months to 1 year of living expenses) in a savings account so it's liquid and DO NOT touch it in case of emergency

Put everything else in mutual and index funds where you can watch your money grow rather than just have it lazing about

>>70116025
hope you're joking

why on earth would you pay money for an event that takes place after your own death

>>70116165
Thought about it.

I haven't.

>it technician job near me
>15,000
>degree and 1 years experience required

ah yes

>>70116167
"Conservative" shills have to stick together for appearances.

They are an endangered species.

how do i keep this buzz going?

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>>70116167
who

i'm assuming paul ryan? he's a globalist, not a republican

>>70116174
Because I don't want my family to have to pay 20 grand for a funeral for me. If I pay for my funeral plan now, my funeral only costs what I paid today. It's a plan that protects you from the rise in costs every year. It's fool proof

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>mfw I can now falseflag as a brit for a few months

>>70116216
if they want to spend 20 grand to chuck you in the ground that's their own fucking nutcase problem

>>70116174
to be fair, he has a point
my gf's parents just paid for her nan's funeral because she's gonna pop her clogs any week now, and paid for both of theirs while they were at it because they're gonna skyrocket over the next few years

>>70116216
i dont think funerals will cost that much. no one will pay for them.

>>70116216
>implying you deserve a 20k funeral

>>70116239
You'd be happy with not having a funeral and being thrown in a ditch? Everyone has to think of funeral preparations

think the algerian bought a proxy

>>70116172
How do you actually get your money out once it is invested though? Say I invest £5k in something pretty boring and safe, an index fund, and over 5 years it grows by however much. How do I reap those rewards? Like is that money accessible or what?

get into the funeral home business if you want to make some serious money

baby boomers are gonna all start dying off within the next 10-20 years

>>70116215
Pretty much all of them except for the small Trump coalition.

They all praise her for standing up for muh """western values""" and for handling the refugee crisis.

>>70116216
no way it costs 20k to dig a whole and chuck you in

>>70116261
>Everyone has to think of funeral preparations

Not when I'm 23

>>70116120
Anycunt?

> yanks call spring onions "scallions"
IT JUST DOESN'T END

FUCKING YANKS

>>70116286
Even Trump praised Merkel in the past

im 18, still in high school

>>70116274
You can withdraw it from your brokerage account at any time but it may take a few days for everything to transfer over to your bank account which is why an emergency fund kept in a bank is important because you may need the money immediately at some point in the future

Do muggers these days ask their victims to factory reset the phone first?

Like if you are robbing someone at knife point, why take a locked iPhone that is no use to anyone when you can just force the victim to unlock it, navigate to the settings page then factory reset it first?

>>70116207
it starting to get like that everywhere.

soon you'll need a degree to be on checkouts

>>70116240
thats dumb, you get a free burial or cremation if you don't pay for one anyway, not sure why people would make a big thing over it. Losing a significant amount of cash over what amounts to a cadaver is just nonsensical

>>70116216
you realise you will be dead an incapable of caring about your familys 20 grand right?

also who the fuck pays 20 grand for a 6 foot ditch and a preist and a party, I'll dig you a hole for 200 quid, sounds like your willingly mugging yourself off

>>70116293
20k was an exaggeration but funeral costs rise every single year. If I pay £x now I know I don't have to pay any more in the future

>>70116261
if you don't do anything they just burn you and throw the ashes away, if your family wants a shrine they can pay for it

>all these job listings needing me to call or email just to get told I don't meet the basic qualifications
wonderful

>>70116261
>You'd be happy with not having a funeral and being thrown in a ditch?

irrelevant, I'll be dead.
frankly I don't care at all what happens to me after I die, how could I?

just bury me at sea for free. i dont care.

>>70115817
What is Ed ancestry. He looks Pakistani

>buried

2spooky

burn me to ashes please

>>70116315
coriander and rocket get bastardised beyond recognition too

>cilantro
>arugula

i've never met an italian or greek who i didn't like

>>70116274
You either call them and do a money transfer to a debit account (takes a week) or pay a small fee and wire it within a day. You can also do the first option online.

As he said, keep a liquid emergency fund in the .5% interest account.
But invest any non-emergency savings in your index fund/mutual fund. That makes 5% a year on average.

Read this senpai
https://www.google.co.uk/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/investing/online-investments/where-to-invest-10000-pounds/amp/?client=safari

>>70116381
polish jew

>>70116392
>arugula
that's a new one on me

fucking yANKOIDS REEEEEEE

>zucchini

>>70116400
>client=safari
doxxed

>>70116355
you dont have to pay anything if you're dead

>>70116323
better start planning your funeral sharpish m8

>>70116390
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2154897/Dead-obese-woman-body-fat-set-building-cremation.html

>>70116315
What the fuck are scallions? I've heard of them a few times but never seen one.

t. Yank

>>70116323
I'm 20. Still in high school

>>70116414
for your own sake, don't google the american for swede (turnip)

Funeral plans:

Cremated
Popped in a firework
Firework display listening to Starman by Bowie. My firework is the last one.

>>70116341
m8 u know nothing of working class ends

there is always at least one rajesh at the local markets who can unlock or reset the thing, then you just pawn it

>>70116441
spring onions you fucking mong he literally just said

>>70116378
It's more for your family than anything else

Of course if you don't have a family then there's no point in it may as well just donate your body to the local medical school

>2067
>not getting your body resomated

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>go to australian super market
>ah yes I'm looking for some peppers
>g'day cunt we call them capsicumes

i shall be getting cremated

>>70116424
>ah yes funeral places work for free

They get their payment from somewhere. And I don't want my family to have to worry about the bill. The funeral plan also takes care of all the arrangements for the funeral so my grieving family don't have to have any more stress

>>70116441
>I'm 20. Still in high school

have you thought about your funeral arrangements?

>>70116421
Name is Alec and I am in a hotel in London right now as well.

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>>70116392
HOLY FUCK
Coriander... is cilantro?

Reckon this lad is a shill for the funeral industry.

>>70116504
EEEEEEEEEEEEEERRR

>>70116380
yeah that would be sound

or a mongolian style sky burial

just leave me in a field and have the foxes pick away at me

>>70116466
here's an idea: simply use your words and say to your family "listen lads I do not give A FUCK about funerals or any noncery and as such have not bought one. Under no circumstances do I want any of you to spend a single penny on a funeral for me

then you die

simple, if they choose not to respect your wishes its their problem

>>70116392
>arugula

Fucking snorted what is this shit

>>70116504
yes it is you fucking degenerate burger

>>70116488
get a grip you friggin basket case

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>Funeral plans:

>Cremated
>Popped in a firework
>Firework display listening to Starman by Bowie. My firework is the last one.

>>70116459
End yourself faggot. I've never heard of or seen a spring onion in my life

>>70116471
>not getting your body crucified

>>70116491
I've though about your's

>>70116504
Other way around, mate.

>having a family to attend your funeral

FONT

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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/North_Sea_flood_of_1953

>24,000 homes destroyed
>1800 people died
>1,000,000 livestock drowned

wew

i want to be buried in a field with a tree planted on top of my grave.

a shame when i die there will be no more fields. just an endless council estate to house poor oppressed rasheeds.

>dying
Plebs

>>70116519
Your family may want you to have a proper send off the least you can do is give them that

>>70116533

rocket, leafy herb that tastes a bit peppery. I think it's roquette in french

I'm so edgy when I die I just want to be put in the bin haha fucking funeral plebs I'm too cool for that

>>70116554
it wasn't enough

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>>70116554
"well fok"

>>70116567
they can get piss drunk in my honour one evening, thats all a funeral really amounts to anyway. No one gives a fuck about the ceremony, getting drunk and sharing stories is the important part

when my grandpa died he got cremated and his ashes scattered over some hills in dorset. Was quite lovely really

honestly don't know what I'm going to do if I ever have to get married and I've got absolutely no family or friends to invite whatsoever

I'm not trying to convince any of you to have a funeral. I'm just saying that buying a funeral makes sense for those wanting a funeral

>>70116633
dont think you need to worry about getting married mate

>>70116633
invite the /brit/ lads

>>70116633
*starts writing your best man speech*

I want my naked corpse hurled off a cliff

>>70116647
I'll give your jaw a free space funeral courtesy of my fists in a minute

just farted and it smells really bad lads

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>>70116633
buy some

there are professional crowds and friends you can rent

>>70116599
A lot of people do care about the ceremony lad that's why they have them

You go to the wake where everyone gets a chance to say their last goodbyes and maybe say a few words to everyone attending then you all go out to dinner and get drunk

i want my naked corpse shot out of a cannon straight into the sun.

>>70116681
Kanker

I want to be put in a meat grinder and fed to little wankers as a school lunch

>>70116693
That's what Hunter Thompson did

do poo in loos have funerals or do you just get dumped in the ganges

>>70116689
>dinner
>at a wake

doing it completely wrong

you go the pub thats over the road from the church at around midday when the ceremony ends and you stay there until it closes or you're physically unable to continue, anything else is disresectful

gonna have my rotting corpse tied to helium balloons and let nature take its course

i want my naked corpse

>>70116730
cremation is customary in hinduism

when i die i want my bollocks turn into glass and then pulverised with a hydraulic press

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uh oh
so much for: "We'll get a good deal because it's in their economic interest."

https://www.bloomberg.com/politics/articles/2017-01-18/merkel-seen-putting-eu-values-ahead-of-car-lobby-in-brexit-talks

>>70116769
this tbqh

>>70116760
>>70116727
whoops

When i die i want my naked body shot out of a canon into a wall and filmed by The SlowMo Guys

>>70116733
reminds me of the lad in San Francisco who tied a bunch of helium balloons to a lawn chair then floated thousands of feet up

he brought a BB gun with him and shot the balloons when he decided to come back down (obvs didn't shoot them all at once)

>>70116730
not everyone is an alcoholic irishman

>>70116797
not alcoholic or irish, are you even british?

>>70116769
That's quite beautiful anon. I can already see them explode in a cloud of sparkling dust, little bollock shards glistening in the light.

>>70116542
>I've never heard of or seen a spring onion in my life
are you 10 or something? fucking weirdo.

>>70116796
was reading about him the other day, was all bant until i heard he'd killed himself

>>70116796
lmao

did NASA sign him up?

did a post yesterday saying how i want to move the UK eventually and someone told me to fuck off

>>70116837
im not working class

>>70116895
FOY

>>70116895
stay

mum just called me a subhuman waste of oxygen haha

you lads ever seen this music vid?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVuB1ZASrGw

fucking quality. reckon i know 90% of the games in it.

a nigger just served me in sainsbury's

>>70116979
and they're all shit. good for you.

>>70116769
this but while I'm alive

>>70116979
thanks for sharing mate

>>70116979
ahh yes, the 'tism

>>70116906
pathetic

dont think im gay but then i have been known to make mistakes!

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>i'm not working class

>>70116998
good vid though tbf

the most beautiful and perfect woman could fall in love with me but the fact that I never experienced teenage love will always haunt me

>>70117056
teenage love is both the best and worst form of love

literally CANNOT stop farting

>>70117042
we've all been there lad, easy to accidentally slip your cock into an arse after a pint or two

/brit/ is very dead. Proof that it's a normie general.

I decided on pepper and wensleydale soup
it was okay

>>70117056
ummmmmmmmmmmm it's the most headache inducing shit ever. i legit reckon it's like 10% great, 90% awful. it's like dating a girl who's constantly on the rag without any notion of space or time alone.

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NEED to stop buying these things

Haven't made a proper meal in days because I'm always in a rush and these are so fucking tasty

>>70117056
>>70117093

this. it's like herpes, but a sort of good kind.

>>70117056
>tfw a girl was absolutely head over fucking heels in LOVE with me when I was 15
>turned her down because I thought I could do better
>almost 23 now and haven't even kissed a girl
haha lmao

all farters should be put to the sword

What's the best way of doing a cheek suicide without anybody knowing where you are?

Writing a short story and want to know what the most plausible way of doing it is. I'm thinking it would just be a case of taking a stroll in to the sea with weighted shoes/pockets.

>>70117122
>it's like dating a girl who's constantly on the rag without any notion of space or time alone.
I would have liked to experience this once

>>70117153
cheeky suicide, that is. Not killing the side of your face.

How does one wank without lube?

People say 'oh there's precum' but I don't see shit

>>70117185
I go dry what are you a fucking pansy

>>70117185
how do people wank WITH lube? Just makes everything slippery and wet and annoying

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>>70117185
PHIMOSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS

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>>70117153
cheek suicide is commonly called a stroke

>>70117153

take a stroll in to a nuclear weaponry testing site

>>70117210
I clarified this in a later post you utter fucking radiator.

>>70117185
rasheed

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8lrRjRWZmBs

been on my mass effect 2 ting

its good and cinematically much better than 1, but I preferred certain things about the first, shotguns were better in that and for some reason the vanguard class is way shitter than it was in 1.


>>70117153
still a good chance you wash up doing that, maybe spend a couple of weeks travelling somewhere very remote and then hanging yourself from a tree where you know there won't be any people in months or years, more or less impossible in da UK though

but in america you could get a week deep in some forest and you wouldnt be found for a looong time

>>70117219
Those don't exist anywhere anymore you spaz

>>70117222
i had already started my humorous post and wasn't about to let you stop the world from experiencing it just cos you realised how much of a spanner you are

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gf's having a bit of a predicament

>>70117153
sneak into a building site and brick yourself up in a wall cavity. easy.

>>70117200
The trick is not putting on too much, but rather balancing the level of friction

>>70117278
would dump my gf instantly if i received these messages

>>70117278
girls shouldn't talk about poo it's very unbecoming

couldn't handle a gf that does bigger poos than me

>>70117233
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sKj9hs5Go4

>>70117198
I hope you actually don't, because it's been shown that doing so will affect sensitivity

smooth seas don't make good sailors, jump ship and head for failure

>>70117345
unless you measure them both you'll never know for sure lad

m8 moved into the outback, does work with abos

she's been there 1 week so far they

>have tried to break into her house at night 3 times
> throw stones at her house every day
>slingshotted rocks through the windows
>smashed her car up

I'm not even there and I think its turning me racist against them

hate both leftists and right wingers

>>70117384
would immediately file for divorce if i saw my wife dropped a mondo log

was walking down the seafront and I saw some twat with concrete blocks around his feet stumbling across the beach and getting stuck in the wet sand

>>70117278
good lass

a good shite is worth the time imo

>>70117313
>>70117342
everyone poos lads

>>70117392
good non-goy

>>70117342
I was in uni once and some 5'3" fella started trying to talk to these two girls about girls pooing. It was very strange.

the ****ing m***ines?

>>70117395
I would be thrilled to be married to some petite girl who drops absolute monster shits

Top tier banter

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>>70117354
>tfw will never throw shapes with some asari qt

>>70117385
cant be racist against animals

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>>70117392

>>70117410
fascinating

*walks off and talks to somebody else*

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>try out my new beard trimmer
>it shears half my skin off

>>70117440
*trips you as you try to walk past and all the girls start laughing at you*

>>70117406
yes but we don't tell the world that we are pooing

>>70117446
disgusting. probably didn't even wipe her crack

wrist feels fucked

why is it so easy to buy drugs off the net lads?
I almost wish mummy may didn't take away my RC's

>>70117463
doing a pooo

doing a poo

>>70117395
she'll drop you for looking in the bowl while she's pooing lad. bit weird.

wey aye mon

just realised i'm being paid below minimum wage

haha :/

>>70117278
>tfw always did turbo poos all my life
>never spend more than 1 minute on the loo even when constipated
>Always wondered how people stay in there for like 30 minutes and read or play shitty mobile games


Might be an alien lads

>>70117458
half your skin?

pausing a poo

>>70117512
yeah half my skin

>>70117446
bet half of it broke off and went back up inside

>>70117511
poos are relaxing
doing a turbo poo is not desirable unless you're in a hurry - you want to savour the sensations as your bowels evacuate

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>>70117534

anyone who still thinks girls don't poo / don't talk about poo has never been close to a girl and her friends
deary me, the things they come out with would turn you lot rosier than a spanked pig

can't remember the last time I had a solid poo

Things I like:
Big jubblies

Things I dislike:
Going to work

>>70117539
I'm straight and i'm not against some arse stimulation but shitting is just boring and interrupts whatever i'm doing so i just get done with the shit and get back to my business

>>70117558
t. Sanjay Gupta

my day
>got up at 7pm
>did nothing all night
>drank somebeers and vodka
>oiled my bike
>passed out/napped for like an hour
>feelin sick now

I r8 it 0.5/10

>>70117539
I love a good poo but im literally too healthy, that every day I do this big massive monster poo but it just comes right out no fuss (but not sloppy) and the whole thing is over and done with in about 2-3 mins tops including wiping and washing hands

disappointing because sometimes I will tkae a magazine in or something

>A woman in Quebec asked Justin Trudeau what would be done to help Anglophones in Quebec access mental health services, as those services are only available in French
>Justin Trudeau replied "As we're in a French province, I will answer in French"
Jesus fucking Christ.

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the gf

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>gf takes a big stinky shit
>she doesn't wipe or flush afterwards

>>70117590
lel

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>>70117595
alri Jim

Frexit
Grexit
Dexit
Duxit

considering setting up a bollock crushing business in australia

Doing a good poo is one of the best things in life.

I like to get onto the toilet but hold it on the cusp for about 5 mins for maximum feeling.

Not sure whether something is wrong with my willy or not

hmm

Ordered a funeral for each and every one of my sperm

>>70117590
All Canadians should speak French desu

NEED a mistress to make me clean her toilet with my tongue

>>70117590
vive le québec libre desu

>>70117639
desu I don't think anyone else will leave but I would love it if france did so I could watch germany shart themselves

>>70117587
>>got up at 7pm
>>did nothing all night
>>drank somebeers and vodka
>>oiled my bike
>>passed out/napped for like an hour
>>feelin sick now

>Literally too healthy

lad.

>>70117639
Fuxit

>>70117671
erectile dysfunction

cymrexit

>>70117688
what?

I'm in ridiculously good physical shape and healthy af
me getting drunk and having a fucked up sleep schedule (at the moment) does not negate that at all

it is literally ridiculous how good shape I am in, I look in the mirror and just think, wow thats ridiculous

>>70111107

>>70117710
also known as an ejaculation

EUxit, or "exit" for short

I'm too young to die

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Not gonna lie, former UKIP supporter here. This is fucking hilarious watching UKIP crash and burn. But in all seriousness we can't let commie Corbyn get his hands on the nuclear codes. Only based mummy May can stop him and deliver on Brexit

i'm too old to live

five sevens haha

we did it reddit!

used to be a bit chubby but thankfully lost it all due to heavy stimulant abuse

ffs still haven't got a full body tinder piccy

remember when tendies was a meme for a solid 8 days

haha, good times

i'm so bored i can't even be arse fini

Pulled my foreskin up all the way over my cock to pretend that I'm phimosislad ahaha

>>70117769
UKIP got what they wanted mate

>having a foreskin

Disgusting

>>70117839
my foreskin does this but I don't have phimosis

>>70117769
Corbyn is more pro-brexit than May

>>70117730
>>70117775
palindromic gets are MUCH rarer than regular gets... why do they never get checked?

I have a crippling fear my parents will write me out of their will.

>>70117871
He's also an imbecile

>>70117769
>thinking Labour have any chance at all

laughing my bum off

moved to england and wrote my runt australian son out of my will

can't stop wanking to tgirls

Moved back to Australia and wrote my son back into my will

'ee

>>70117932
Nothing wrong with wanking t'girls mate

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>He's also an imbecile

>>70117974
lol triggered labour cuck

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>Why yes, m'lady, I have always said 'tis better to be dead than a red!

hankering for a wankering

bet i'd have a gf right now if it was the 1930s

>>70117899
wrong. are jez will revive our economy via big data

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>lol triggered labour cuck

government idea: runtocracy

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>bet i'd have a gf right now if it was the 1930s

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>lol triggered labour cuck

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>bet i'd have a gf right now if it was the 1930s

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>lol triggered labour cuck

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oxygen is poison

don't fall for the atmospheric jew

stay woke

>>70118041
>>70118076
i would though

back before the 60s when the sexual revolution turned all women into whores

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>back before the 60s when the sexual revolution turned all women into whores

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>back before the 60s when the sexual revolution turned all women into whores

>>70118119
but you have phimosis

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>back before the 60s when the sexual revolution turned all women into whores

can't stop wanking t'girls

Should I do laundry... or should I continue to wear the same smelly shirts for another day....


ahhh yes

Women were all whores back before the 60's too. They just didn't brag about it like they do now.

bet id be dead right now if it was the 1630s

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>one chance to take an official portrait photo for the coming presidency
>looks shit-scared in it

I want to live in a massive city and just be another face in the crowd and live a solitary life

I was thinking maybe Tokyo or New York or one of the other big American cities

>the so-called sexual revolution
>birth rates drop and no one can get laid
hmmmm
more like sexual poovolution

>>70118180
Might you have more than 1 shirt

can't make lunch because the fucking normies are playing FIFA in the kitchen

>>70118211
>just be another face in the crowd
>in Japan

genius

*door slams open*
*glides into the room on my heelies*
the thing is-
*falls flat on my face*

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>work calling me on my day off
isn't this illegal

fuck off

>>70118119
Women were already whores, the real issue was allowing us into the workforce and birth control,

>>70118211
I had that comfy feeling in Berlin while riding the metro system. felt like I was a character in a gritty anime

Berlin's not too big and not too small either so I would suggest there

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is this programme a documentary?

>>70118211
Ah yes

>pay gorllion currency for a small flat with rent hike each month
>get stabbed everyday
>get attacked everyday
>pay £45 for a pint
>can use a car

B-but a Tesco Express in a never ending turf war with the homeless is only 2 bus rides away!