/brit/

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inevitably I've fallen in love with the fwb

moving to Brentford 2bh

>>69607010
>find out
It's blatantly obvious she already is lad, you just need to offer the right amount

>>69607036
GOOD POST XDDDD DUDE CARA IS SO FUCKING HOT THIS 2BH

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kay-on

we need a new term for working class
most areas described as working class are full of dole scroungers and neets

'friends' used to pick on me so much one actually asked how i found the will to get out of bed every morning

still miss that human contact though

>>69607073
there already is a word for them - the underclass

>>69607073
underclass

rosy can you put aisha on

>>69606985
All hands, Cromwell vs. Sinn Fein

what's a really quiet part of britain i should visit

>>69607073
JAMs

Doing an amphetamine poo

OK YEA SO SHE GAVE ME UCK YEA, SO OBVIOUSLY YEA BOSSMAN WAS SHAGGING THIS SKET YEA, THE WINGS WERE PENG THOUGH YEA

>>69607073
peasants? Go back to the basics

>>69607126
grimsby in near the arcade

Where do you think you'll be in 5 years, lads?

What do you think life has in store for you?

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me on the left

>>69607038
time to call it a day laddo

respond to this post if you own muji shoes

>>69607135
Don't know what any of this means. I hope nobody talks like this in real life.

>>69607162
dead hopefully

sent a willy picture to 15 girls on snapchat at 5am out of the blue

hate myself

>>69607162
hopefully dead

i really can't see any way up from here

>>69607162

dead from drugs

>>69607162
we'll all still be here. just older and less happy.

>>69607177
I guess you've never gone to london then

>>69607038
is jermaine okay

need a goth gf

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is the aussie here who was pretending to be a muslim and messaging the northern brothers?

> when you burn through the cuties on tinder and now you're being offered up the orange gutter gremlins
Time to move

>>69607185
what compels men to do this
most women do NOT like dick pics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HpPUUWp5sO4

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>>69607212
this
>>69607242
Only this could save me though

>>69607185
mate you're literally going to prison for this post

>>69607232
No, he's one of those thick cunts that thinks because he can state the obvious in an articulate manner it makes him intelligent.

4chan X seems to have been updated. You will need to reload the page.

I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE

TO THE LOGO

OF THE UNITED STORES OF WALMART

need to stop doing gear in pubs on friday nights

chat so much fucking arse

>>69607218
>less happy
fuck sake
im only 20 and im already unhappy
stress of things getting worse

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>>69607232
thinking about philosophy

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>>69607259
this pic literally got me laid

does anyone else ever have it when they're about to drift off to sleep then you hallucinate a loud bang or scream or something that makes you jump

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>>69607072
K-on? more like GAY-on

wish there was a grindr for drugs desu

>>69607242
outstanding post

>>69607259
don't know man I'm a weird bloke when I'm off my nut
>>69607283
why

bought fallout 4, played 10 minutes then went back to /brit/

>>69607040
where's your LA flag?

phimosis means i could never do a dick pic

>>69607328
yeah like 3 times in my life

hypnagogic jerk

>>69607383
ovavu

10 years since maddy went missing this year

whenever I get drunk by myself I get tempted to pop up to girls I fucked things up with

>>69607328
sometimes when i'm about so sleep I roll over and think i'm about to fall out of my bed but i'm actually in the middle of the bed and nowhere near the edge

>>69607328
yea

>>69607383
>>69607417
superb posts

>>69607422
somewhat lewd

>>69607451
fascinating
*rolls over and sleeps with someone else*

>>69607285
him:
>millions of pounds
>top tv job
>any bird he fancies

you:
>poor
>unemployed
>lying in your own filth wanking to traps

think he'll be fine desu

maddy on the map

>>69607417
all cypriots should be killed

>>69607328
I've had a few moments recently where I'm drifting off to sleep but I still feel semi-conscious, my eyes still open but I'm not sure whether I'm awake or asleep
Only lasts a second or so then I jump awake

It's a bit of a scary feeling desu

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off to bed lads, who wants to kiss me goodnight?

>>69607422
makes me gag everytime

even im sick of suicide posting but i can't stop

>>69607486
Alri Jermaine, you thick nigger.

>>69607521
*takes a piss on you*

don't really understand why niggers have to be so fucking loud all the time

>>69607486
getting a bit defensive there jermaine

>>69607544
>>69606640

>>69607508
How rude.

>>69607521
*farts on your face*
ahahahaha banter

>>69607569
Ever seen Chimpanzees mate?

>>69607576
Sue me.

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>>69607542
>>69607519
>>69607497
>>69607447
>>69607382
>>69607356

>>69607486
truly inspiring, the man with a top tv job and millions of pounds posting alongside the poor and unemployed.

>>69607593
FOY

sick of that cunt who keeps complaining about his foreskin

>>69607587
Went on a school camp in year 6 and some lad did this to another kid, teabagged as well

Think he might be a bit gay in hindsight, it was totally at random

every day I dream about being rich, sometimes for hours. can't be healthy

good evening to everyone except yanks

sick of my foreskin

fucking foreskin wanker loves his fucking foreskin

>>69607664
don't care

>>69607671
>>69607673
Outstanding

>>69607669
at least that's achieveable
all i do every day is dream about going out with the hottest girl in school as a teenager

farted on my little brother's face once
I was bare arsed and a piece of shit came out and landed bang on his cheek

going to watch Star Trek: The Next Generation to see what all the hype is about

can't imagine it will be any good

life in Bruceville sounds wild

>ywn go to Summer Heights High

not got a foreskin myself. had such bad phimosis as a little lad that my cock looked like it was going to explode when i tried to piss so they gave me the ol' snip

had my big brother fart in my face once

he turned into a bender, no surprises

>>69607623

FOJJ

farted on my grandad's face once

any good anime this season lads

>ask the gf to be honest
>she says something honestly
fuck sake just wanted her to say yes then lie to me so I could fool myself

Just fried my jubilees in the new Gary Coleman Sperm-Simmering Grill™

The juicy innards of your baby makers drain into a tray for easy drinking

only learned at the tender age of 17 that you were supposed to pull your foreskin back when you piss

was like a firehose before, no control

>>69607755
let's see it then

>>69607782
new Vikings is pretty decent so far

Come home European Man

can't wait for my session with princess chelsea later

*walks in with me lads with https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUhVCoTsBaM playing through a stereo*

alri alri you mongs

>>69607787
Exact same for me
Mummy had quite a bit of cleaning to do prior to that discovery

is JJBA any good?

>>69607789
"no"

imagine ever having gone to a public school

is CBT any good?

>>69607858
Why are you quoting?

>>69607864
hurts a bit

was a real shame to learn last night that insulin overdoses only had a 2.7% chance of success

>United in the title race

ROARING, they're so clearly inferior in every department to Chelsea and City this season

everyone leave me alone

I don't want to talk to you

>>69607872
myself lad. so you know it's me saying it.

>>69607862
When you say "public school" do you mean the normal definition that actually makes sense or the retarded British definition

lmao just remembered the time I got in a fight with some Italian gyal in Venice

>>69607711
Used to hold my bro down and do the almost spit and suck it up thing sometimes let it go.
He's massive now.
I like to think we've grown up and forgotten.
I can see it in his eyes sometimes. He hasn't.

alri

Does anyone else here browse britpol what the fuck happened to it, it's just tripcancer and slow now

>>69607840
had to wipe down the back of the toilet seat a fair few times

>>69607864
ive seen it described in more detail and it sounds like a crock of shite

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How's /GF2017/ coming along lads?

>>69607893
I see

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https://youtu.be/qZUn-KtTNmA?t=50s

>>69607905
venice is a shithole. smelt like shit and there were bin bags everywhere

>>69607885
>to city
is that you pep

>>69607929
made eye contact with a goth girl yesterday

>>69607885
>Chelsea

can't even beat spurs

if i went back in time, went inside my prepubescent body and started kissing primary school girls while retaining the brain I have now would that make me a nonce?


asking for a friend

Really wish i could have my tender testies take immense pressure of the post-Brexit economic strain

Phwoar

>>69607946
A few Italian cities are shitholes tbf - Milan, Naples, Rome, Venice. Tourism has kind of ruined them

Genoa and Florence are grand though.

>>69607957
how is she famous? she is very plain

>>69607929
Harder than last year but will be easier than next year

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Guy Mowbray is best commentator

>>69607980
Simon says yes

>>69607713
starts off pretty shit but gets better as it goes on

>>69607931
"glad i could clear that up for you lad"

drugs are still taking effect from last night

not sure if I can stomach a sausage sarnie

miss watching nickelodeon after coming home from primary school

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEhJjpZnZ1Q

https://youtu.be/NHozn0YXAeE?t=53s

>>69607980
No It would just make you a severely depressed child

>>69608060
fuck off billionaire

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completing my slide into a lonely and worthless existence consisting of a dingy room, a low paid job, and a good helping of alcoholism

already cut off most of my contacts, just got the gf and my brother that are still persisting

>>69608060
>his parents had Foxtel
Fuck OFF

>>69608029
>black

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dg6JSeDh5Q

Collab idea: Timothy James Byrne and Kay's Good Cooking

even if i started right now on improving myself its already too late
my peers have done their growing and i'll never catch up and always be weird

>>69608034
yeah mate got to be honest it's wank so far

some gay pirate has just shown up on the ship and now he's a US army sergeant

some lad got frozen

thought it was supposed to be space battles and that

>>69607977

beat them at the bridge this season

>>69607954

>worse squad
>lost at home to them (again)
>literal 6th

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WE
WUZ
SHIPBUILDERS
N SHEEIT

how many of you lads were posting here on christmas day?

babestation

>>69608085
>gf
fuck off, zero sympathy for you normie cunt

Miss watching Primary School children after coming home from my job at Nickelodeon

>>69608083
>>69608091
lmaoing @ ur life

lads

how do you revise when you only have 2 days left?

>>69608091
>tfw had foxtel since the 90s
imagine i would have tried to kill myself in primary school if i didn't have it

>>69608092

t. small willy

>>69608101
>those clubbed fingernails

absolutely vile

>>69608129
don't worry, it'll be over soon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvjLgjtJKsc

>>69608105
season 1 is shite desu gets much better

>>69607864
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy?
It's essentially the most scientific method of therapy, especially good if you're suffering from depression or anxiety disorders.

>>69608116
drugs lad was pretty funny on christmas day desu

>he had sky as a kid

literally FOB

>>69608152
ABC was enough when I was young, then there was the Simpsons and shit on Channel 7 I think
Otherwise I had a normal childhood with friends that I spent most of the afternoon with

only took 3 days but with weekends and public holidays it has felt like a fortnight

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Nipping out to the shop to buy some paracetamol lads, you want anything?

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eating some pic related, at least it's a step up from super noodles/pot noodle.

can't imagine watching public television as a kid

grim

>>69608215
get us a pack of paracetamol too

miss playing playjam after school

>>69608215
cornetto

>>69607980
>time travel
surely you don't live more than 30 mins from a school? i think it'd be easier for you mate

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>>69608182
WOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

BLUKU

>>69608233
>>69608233
NONCE

>>69607787
same
felt revolutionary

they call me young dagger dick thats my handle yeah

>>69608218
Have you tried Koka noodles lad? They're great

>watching television

I just played video games on my computer

world would be better if the brits wiped out blacks tbqf

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DNQRtmIMxk

>>69608184
meant cock and ball torture sorry

>>69608183
ffs there's like 25 episodes in it too

why you buy paracetamol when ibuprofen exists?

nipping out to homebase to buy some edging for the ol' hallway floor lads. you want anything?

we have the weakest politicians since 1939

>>69608265
>television
>video games
FOY

ZIM ZIMMER
...

>>69608271
oh well that's pretty good too

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>>69608285

>>69608255
a lot of post-piss dribble too

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these two mongs

have both my box fan and heater on

>>69608285
You want a decking mate?

>>69607787
Best is pinching it then piss in your closed foreskin and see it swell up then release, golden shower.

Might fly business class Heathrow-Helsinki-Tallin, go for dinner, get smashed and head straight back to the airport. £233 and will get me enough British Airways status for free lounge access for the next 18 months.


hhmmmmm

>>69608225
CBBC had some good shit you snobby cunt

I'll heem any of the twats who had cartoon network

lads lads
anyone have mental health issues here? did you go to a GP first? did they refer you to a psychiatrist or something?

posting so i don't waste captcha

you lads know why they call nonces nonces?

>>69608350
>anyone have mental health issues here?
hahaha

>>69608350
yes yes and yes

>>69608268
Solid tune in retrospect

just looking at that mental case's post gave me ptsd lads

>>69608350
No. I tried to hang myself then got sectioned. ;_;

was never a fan of ed edd and eddy

>>69608350

>brit
>mental health issues

grow up lad

>>69608393
ah mate, hope you're not still in that state of mind

>>69608285
as it happen's, i'm a specialist as edging in hallways. Got suspended from school in yr11 for it once.

>>69608378
they just ARRRR!

>>69608403
this
/brit/ is a deano general now

imagine a film of yours was in production for 12 years and its released passed in a month or two then everyone forgot about it hahaha

>>69608350
they'll offer you any applicable medication and then if there are any NHS therapy places nearby (usually there aren't because it's a shitshow) they'll refer you there, otherwise they'll just tell you about other help places locally (usually shitty ones)

might have to find some new mates

me current pals spend their free time watching conspiracy videos on youtube

they take brain supplements as well lmao

>>69608350
You don't tell anyone or try to get help you fucking bender

Real men suffer in silence

>>69608350
I have schizophrenia

>>69608434
lol wat fi;m

>>69608431
deano isn't self aware

>>69608268
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHjNmyzrVvM

>>69608395
the ending is depressing, turns out that they were old all along and eddy was just imagining it because of how miserable he is

>>69608350
yes
yes
he gave me a plan that allowed me to go see a psychologist and i still go to him for pills

>>69608445
hmmm. Think i have an issue but i don't want to go on meds and i don't really want to be mentally ill but i would also rather that it didn't get worse.
hmmmmmmmmmmm

https://youtu.be/ZyhrYis509A?t=1m55s

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>>69608447
their hearts in the right place I suppose

gp recommended me a psychiatrist

never went

what's the Brighton of the north?

people who deny global warming are edgy, retarded contrarian little gimps

>>69608561
probably manchester

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every australian poster itt

anxiety gives me chronic nausea haha

love Amsterdam in the summer

sunset at 11, qts riding bikes, decent beer

what more could ye want

>>69608561
How do you mean?

>>69608350
went to a student doctors in uni and basically had a breakdown in the office

silly bitch wouldn't give me any medication and wanted to send me to some "group counseling" so i decided to suffer in silence
4 years later and i'm actually doing a bit better x

>>69608561
Northerners are hard lad.
Mancs probably.

>>69608561

we don't have any poofs up north

>>69608620
bit expensive

budapest/prague is better

>>69608575
i do fully believe in man made climate change but you're being a fucking mong. Climate science is extremely complex, one of the theories as to other causes of global warming is the patterns of the sun (which historically has had massive impacts on global climate, like the medieval warm period). Go look on /sci/ global warming threads, not everyone who thinks humans arent the main cause is some dumb redneck

>>69608461
this

>talking about things ever

>Be american

>>69608586
delete this picture of my right now

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNsmiqmaEWo

>still over 30c

ah yes

>>69608620
>what more could ye want
Australia nuked to fuck

Just made an absolute blinder of a post and not ONE of you runts even noticed it. /brit/ really has gone down the pan.

>>69608393
I hanged myself with a cable, there was no pain whatsoever. I just felt a huge pressure on my head, then ringing on my ear and my vision started going crazy and everything went black. I even felt kind of euphoric, like when you are heavily drunk.

Ever since i did that, i realized suicide hanging is completely painless and extremely effective.

>>69608586

best post ITT

>>69608626
>4 years later and i'm actually doing a bit better x
glad to hear it x
maybe still consider seeing a therapist though? not necessarily a group session

>>69608517

one of em just got into pua shit as well

cringey as fuck seeing him try it out on nye

£60 1 hour, NON sexual one on one cuddle party.

This is a non sexual service that takes the girlfriend aspect and intensifies the benefits of human touch therapy. A cuddle is good for releasing oxytocin & relaxing. Intimacy in it's most innocent form. My holistic background makes this such an enjoyable treat. You are welcome to bring comfy clothes with you & we can choose any manner of position from the cuddle sutra during our time together, spooning, caressing, no rhyme or reason just a good cuddle.

Nudity is allowed of course however if you wish for any sexual services it will be my normal hourly rate of £130. This does not include wanking, so bear that in mind if booking. We can pillow talk away or we you can simply rest while being held, it's up to you how you spend your cuddle hour. I've got some nice to the touch silk sleepwear or just regular PJs. You are welcome to get aroused but please be aware this is not a sexual service given the lowered rates of my normal sexual service therefore touching is restricted to my chest & butt because hey they're fun and squishy but not pubic area as to avoid confusion between my service.

Kissing is fine & encouraged in touch therapy. An intimate option for those unable to perform in the bedroom or those just looking for something more relaxing

Overnights are a sleepy mix of hanging out, cuddling, candles, hot drinks, massage and DVDs. ( I like thrillers but generally anything but horror films I'm awful to watch those with haha ). Morning cooked breakfast made by me 0:). Let me know what alcoholic drinks you like if any.

30 mins quick cuddle refresher = £30
1 hour = £60
Overnight = £350

>>69608699
thanks

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JUST

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>Be a Spainican

>>69608690
What's it like to be a ghost la

>>69608725
is it working for him?

>the london borough of reading

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>>69608748

>>69608679
happens to me CONSTANTLY

made some of the best posts in /brit/s recent history and they haven't even been acknowledged

>>69608748
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZXLLMbJdZ4

>>69608745

al habsi in nets

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>>69608733
>Nudity is allowed of course however if you wish for any sexual services it will be my normal hourly rate of £130. This does not include wanking, so bear that in mind if booking

http://sketchtoy.com/67794439

>£5.2 million to a pop band
>aid
perhaps negroids are intelligent after all

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>Londob

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>>69608747
AMÉRICAAA

https://youtu.be/6M6samPEMpM?t=1m36s

>>69608836
>most affluent and relevant part of the county is the most white
really encourages one to contemplate

cashews are the superior nut

>>69608768

don't think so. he's too awkward

he's got girls in the past though just from being handsome. makes me ree uncontrollably

have you ever saw a glimpse of a girls anus and vagina irl while she is peeing outdoors

>>69608931
ah well, best of luck to him

>>69608943
Girls don't pee outdoors, silly

>>69608836

is there a white british version?

this is sugar coating the truth by including poles gypos and other filth as white

>>69608971
sure they do. on long car journeys and such. girls can't hold it as long as men

PUA master here

you wanna get laid? do the following:

lead off with a neg and then look for IOI's, make sure you escalate quickly and keep playfully insulting while laying foundation, but don't forget to agonize her friends while giving off clarity of intent, look for affirmations (her breathing) and keep communication frequency at compliance, she will shit test you so build credibility by direct game, using the disarm approach wingman. Drop anchor, then eject while eye glazing using the implicit technique, one she's lockedout nickle back her till game over

https://youtu.be/BZzsi1y82Y8?t=28s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnCB-3jklfM
tune

>>69609030

shit gimmick made worse by how hard you're trying

>>69609012
thanks for the advice anon

any tragedies you want to happen?

why the fuck did I sign up to do a Master's

I HATE uni, I HATE uni work, essays and reports can GO TO FUCK, jesus christ

I could be working in tesco right now...

>>69609063

FRANKIE TEARDROPPPPP.........AAAHHHH

>>69608971
>he's never been on a bus to a club and a piss stop
>never seen grills squatting and pulling keks to the side to empty the wkd from the bladder

>>69609107

wouldnt be a tragedy if you wanted it to happen would it

>>69609107
too late, you were already born
>>69609115
poor frankie

stick another 50 posts on the /brit/ key bossman

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>>69609113
this will be u if u dont try anon

>>69608917
>london
>affluent

LAUGHING out loud lad. Bunch of rich jews in a few towers doesn't make london any less of a paki shitehole

>>69609107
obviously not

>>69609129
yes it would as long as it causes great suffering

>>69609110
>>69609110
>>69609110
>>69609110

>>69609113
same lol
exam in 2 days might fail it lol

https://youtu.be/9wfpXI5PKlw?t=49s

>>69608971
https://is.4chan.org/gif/1483397275384.webm

>>69609107
Hamlet
King Lear
Romeo and Juliet