/brit/

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who /yankgf2017/

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>>69075268
FUCK!

happy birthday santa

Gave all the Christmas money I got to Rosy. Feel sick but I'm so obsessed.

First of all *scrunches up label* I'm not a number I'm a human being *throws label*

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mum literally got me a keyring with that crying tears of laughter emoji on

>>69075312
lol she wont care

i gave her $1.5k :P

having my lonely xmas wank

>>69075321
Be grateful you cunt.

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>>69075292
top idea

Just saw mrs browns boys is on and remembered someone at work bought her parents tickets to mrs brown boys live

someone else was excited that she had free express delivery from Next

wish i could be entertained by the trivial nonsense that titillates the robot peon masses

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>tfw christmas is getting shitter every year

today was barely more exciting than a normal saturday

top 3 Christmas songs:

Last Christmas
Stay Another Day
Fairytale of Newyork

people who want heroes will end up with traitors, you can't get jesus without judas

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rate the 'tify lads

>>69075251
wish i was this funny when i was younger maybe id have friends

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tired of watching Dr Poo
might have a wank

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>>69075429
good taste friend

cocaine is mad like

you do a line and don't feel too fucked and go ahead and do mad things which feel normal at the time and then you come down and you're like fuck me I was fucked and what I did was just mental haha

have about 5 boxes of heroes/celebrations etc to eat

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>>69075383

the country of england voted it the best sitcom of all time

fairly disgusting desu

>>69075340
Please have a penis.

>>69075312
Seek help. What is her twitter?

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had a nice christmas lads

enjoyed playing trivial pursuit with the senpai and sporadic checks of /brit/ where i particularly enjoyed the cokeposting

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need a zionist gf

>>69075429
THE SMITHS
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Leeds? Oh you mean "North Wakefield"

>>69075390
last year I got so wasted on Christmas even that I slept all morning and felt like shit Christmas day,

this year was solid though the clothes my family got me were a bit ugly

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NYAAAAAA!!!

>>69075482
cokeposting is best posting desu

>>69075482
happy holidays to you too :)

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here we all are now

all the lads

>>69075292
Yank women are bloody horrid.

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>>69075383

rate these gimmicks:

the pengest munch
all caps lyrics
gay posting
REALLY gay posting
the chase reaction image posting

>>69075491
imagine her nose right up your ass while you take a big fart

http://wundergroundmusic.com/martin-garrix-tearful-after-mother-reveals-theres-no-such-thing-as-santa/

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>no socks gf in my stocking this morning
in fact there wasn't even a stocking

might neck myself

>>69075451
THAT'S ME IN THE CORNER

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>>69075545

>>69075523
>>69075475
Its like people forgot these two exist (it crowd, inbetweeners also top tier)

have left the senpai downstairs whilst they watch more runt tv

might go sleep

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>>69075429

>>69075429

me 10 years ago tier

Got a lynx gift set

Luckily my mum did it as a laff because of memes

>>69075429
surprinsgly decent
playtime is over is the best album on there though

>>69075553
shit
good
shit
shit
alrigte

>>69075509
did you see where that guy was smoking weed via a coke (-a cola) can at like 10:00am

cracked me up haha

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Family were very pleased with the presents I got them

>britfags find brendan carroll funny

Jesus wept

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>wish i could be entertained by the trivial nonsense that titillates the robot peon masses

>>69075624
i did not
wasn't awake at that point haha

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>has a reddit flag
>used the term 'chase reaction image posting'

going to sleep, night night friends

just had a wank lads

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=su_vpW3mM5w

why are yanks so edgy

shan't be replying to HIM.

lisicki has been posting 'happy holidays' all fucking day and not one person has rose to his awful bait

fucking give it up

still hungover from christmas eve

what a night haha

>>69075608
only got an Adidas gift set 2bh

HE

>>69075673
he's so desperate for attention

>>69075451

absolutely NOTHING wrong with a bit of demarco on a sunday evening x

>>69075615

bow e3 best tune

Sitcoms are unfunny and shit

>>69075340
wow
Please have a penis.

>>69075669
unironically think the guy with short hair is very attractive

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>christmas day is over
>shit food
>shit presents
>shit company
>will spend boxing day hung over
>back to work tuesday
>no plans for NYE

just fucking plug me in the back of the head

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWYlu14VeFE

>>69075673
good to see lads not bothering though

THERE'S A CLUB IF YOU'D LIKE TO GO

YOU COULD MEET SOMEBODY WHO REALLY LOVES YOU

SO YOU GO, AND YOU STAND ON YOUR OWN

AND YOU LEAVE ON YOUR OWN

AND YOU GO HOME

AND YOU CRY AND YOU WANT TO DIE

>>69075729
she wants a skinner from brum

>>69075675
midnight mass was mad wasnt it

>>69075632
what presents?

I had a yank gf during my first year of uni

if she didn't eat at least 1 burger per week she'd get horribly ill

always made me giggle

>>69075675
me too haha

WHEN YOU SAY "ITS" GONNA HAPPEN NOW

WELL, WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU MEAN?

YOU SEE I'VE ALREADY WAIT TOO LONG

AND ALL MY HOPE IS GONE

>>69075752
dunno lad was at the pub sinning

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Me on the right

NEED a korean GF

Is Britain going to be full of literally nothing but Rooneys and Rasheeds now that Brexit is happening?

>>69075769
that's bullshit lad

only a moron would believe you

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5 days into Nofap lads - 85 more to go. Anyone else done it before/doing it now?

christmas is over

presents were decent (a nice backpack and money)

food was shite

family fucked off at 9 to uncle's gaff

now absolutely BLASTING tunes home alone

been an alri xmas

>>69075777
good stuff

always enjoy getting ratarsed with the boys on christmas eve way more than christmas itself

>tfw soldiers who were drafted and taken away from their family to suffer in a jungle across the world for years return home only to have hippies throw shit at them and call them baby killers.

>>69075769
what'd she look like? high-test?

Shan't lie to you boys, this autistic lyric posting really does the old nut in

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WILL STRAW (yes, that loser in the referendum and son of Jack, also a Blairite who couldn't win a seat for Labour) WILL BECOME A MOTHERFUCKING COMMANDER OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE, honors' system in tatters, if proof was ever needed.

Pokemon sun for my younger sister
Japanese whiskey for my dad
Manga for my older sister

Fucking hell lads I've fucked up big time

The company I work for (I'm an accountant) raised over £300k for Great Ormond St Hospital over the past couple of weeks and I was supposed to write the cheque today and deliver it

But when I put pen to paper I found myself writing 'Princess Chelsea' on the recipient line instead of 'Great Ormond St' - I literally couldn't help myself it's like I was hypnotised

The cheque has already been posted to my spoilt little brat princess - oh my life lads I am so fucked my boss is going to have my guts for garters

>>69075830
literally cumming as we speak

>>69075865

>the city of wolverhampton

>>69075878
boring gimmick

piss off rosy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxbzujA69DA
> Dark skin boy, man are over-black

What did Stormy meant by this?

>>69075878
decent post

>>69075830
did it for 10 days

wasnt really on the nofap, i just didnt wanna jerk off at a hotel.

i became pretty alfa during that period and also very social

>>69075822
na it's true mate

we tested it several times, and every time she didn't have at least one burger per week she'd get horribly ill

>>69075845
very skinny

Love it lads Christmas time time for family and friends but it's only one day off hahaha

Got mum a cordless vacuum she wanted and a foot spa thing.

>>69075292
i would absolutely adore a yank gf in 2017

>>69075637
same lolll
haha

>>69075878
was treated at great ormond st when I had a stroke

they did a great job haha

>>69075897
>>69075905
hmmmmmmmmmmm

doing a VERY hard think

>>69075821
rooneys, rasheeds and rashfords yeah

>>69075878
she only takes amazon vouchers because otherwise she'll have to pay tax

haven't eaten anywhere near as many sweets/chocolates as I thought I would

>>69075878
This will be gimmick of the year 17

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want to post some lewds of the yank gf but dont want janny to get to me

>>69075903
superb video, had to watch it muted though

>>69075940
They treated you for having a wank? Bit far haha!

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REALLY makes you think..

>>69075918
my gf now is skinny. they smell better but less kinky

my laptop lasts quite a long time desu fampai

>>69075949
Who are Rashfords? Are they like the Rothschilds and the royals?

>>69075878

smiled at guts for garters

CHRISTMAS CHOCCY POWER RANKINGS

1) Quality Street
2) Thorntons
2) Roses
3) Heroes
4) Lindt
5) Cadbury selection box
6) After Eights
7) Ferrero Rocher

POWER GAP

100) Chocolate Orange

POWER GAP

9999) '''Toblerone'''

>>69075912
>i just didnt wanna jerk off at a hotel.
why not

>>69076005
they are the dabbing niggers

>>69075865
>>69075896
just remembered paul lambert manages wolves now
HOWLING

poor bloke nearly topped himself at villa

Just had to manhandle my poo with my actual bare hands in order to unblock the toilet. Then I took a piss in the sink as the rules of human decency clearly no longer apply to me

i am absolutely finished, absolutely overloaded my poo glands today and my body is trying to flush it out in one go it seems, already had 3 big shits today and can feel another brewing

glad to see the titchposting gimmick is still alive

how is the 2016 gimmick of the year poll looking

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M
a
r
i
n
a
?

tanning a bottle of fine tasmanian wine

thanks aussie lads

>>69076027
prob afraid the maid would nick his sperm innit

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>I come to your team and I fuck shit up, I'm David Moyes

>>69075986
I really enjoy how trashy areas look when they're covered in graffiti.
definitely want that in my neighbourhood

>>69076036
>>69076048
decent posts

>>69076021

haven't seen a post of this utter quality in a while

>>69076031

we had some good nights with the 'berk, towards the end a few shots on target was seen as a good game though

>>69076036
Ive had to do the same in the past

Wrapped my hand in a Tesco bag but it had holes in it

Started crying as I smushed up my poo

Janny post lewds of your gf

Insured on the dads vespa, drove to work on thursday lol, cant wwit to get my own one painted

Dont hate taigs much anymore

Am now a wageycuck

Still no gf

2016, has been good but.... Yeh ugmm 2017 will be BETTER!!

>>69076021
what about ladyfingers?
and belgian biscuits

>>69076058
Anyone got the webm of her showing off her /fit/ness?

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>>69075938
I tried Goa trance, a what I heard of it was shitty.

>>69076104
>dads Vespa

Dad sounds like a right shirtlifter

>>69076048
Screaming

xanax kicking in

been drinking since 11am so should be a nice KO

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>>69076058

>>69076082
well never forget that night against bradford in the league cup semi final

>>69076058
Man i would give her 69, licks to the pusy

>>69076141
DELET

manchester? ah, you mean east salford

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Just payed a Latvian cam girl €4 to stick a banana up her arse while screaming "DADDY PLEASE NO"

Love the shit i can get them to do for pennies

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Decided to go to reddit for Christmas.

The entire place is basically just a fedora bait post incarnate. What is wrong with these people? Is it all about getting points and attention? Is /brit/ this bad for the (you)'s I always thought it was just ironic shitposting.

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>>69076166

>>69076021
Grim.
My list:
1. Ferrero Rocher
2. Celebrations
3. Chocolate coins
4. Roses
5. Heroes

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>>69075340
ditto>>69075476
>>69075723

... Wank picture 25 December 2016 ...

>>69076170
That's where you're wrong, kiddo

>>69076148

was on my birthday haha x

going to spurs away this birthday x

christ i need to get a life outside of villa x

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>>69076168
SALFORD
ON
THE
FUCKING
MAP
BOYS

THE BANKERS
THE BONUSES

>>69076170
want to put my willy in her mouth

NEED a white south african gf

Ugly people want to fuck too

>>69076204
alri tim

london? you mean east reading

>>69076212
do you go down with your mates or your dad or?

>>69076047
DID YOU JUST ASSUME.. "the face"

Christmas tv is so shit this year lads

>>69076190
>Chocolate coins
alright Mr Noseburg

>>69076168
Manchester? ah, you mean west Oldham

England? Ah, you must mean North kent

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Spend all of christmas alone
what am I doing

im ugly as fuck ladsssssssss

im so ugly and im a vrigin LOOOOOOOL

UK? you mean east ireland?

birmingham? never heard of it mate

oooooooooooooooh you mean north solihull

got my brother a crate of budweiser
mum a bottle of champagne
dad a bottle of sailor jerrys
younger brother a load of chocolate

>>69076136
ah yes alcohol and benzos

the literal idiots drug cocktail

>>69076263
only things on are either 24h Indiana jones or 24h Dr Who

>>69076290
alri me

mum just asked me if i wanted to come and watch mrs browns boys

lol

>>69076290
I'm decent in the mirror but an ugly fucking mongo shithead inbred in real life

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>mfw they've proven mouth breathers are mentally handicapped

https://news.northwestern.edu/stories/2016/12/rhythm-of-breathing-affects-memory-and-fear/

Arcing 300 kilovolts through my bollocks

Love the science set mum got me for chris

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>>69076252

travel with an away fans club desu

usually either my brother or best pal

>>69076329
CROSSDRESSING!
HAHA!
ITS THE FUNNIEST THING

>revising on Christmas day
J U S T

>>69076332
im a fucking ugly cunt and an utter spastic and my parents think im attractive

it's so sad 2bh i wish i was someone elses son

>>69076182
life pro tips is a fucking shitshow

literally people who want reddit:the lifestyle post there

>>69075429
dickhead

>>69076366

i'm far too intelligent to study for exams or send off my UCAS application

might just do a cheeky 'cide on new years eve

LSD has evolved my mind so far I'm within perhaps the top 1000 most enlightened people on the planet right now

When you spend so much time on circuits 6 and 7 you struggle to relate to the silly sheeple stuck on circuit 2 us v them tribal mentalities

walked in on the senpai watching gogglebox and the people on there seem pretty woke 2bh

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>>69076403

Done a 300 pound order off alphabay and its been 8 days and still not turnrd up lolz

wht happens after you graduate the college

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>>69075340
>tfw you can't find the source

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Still got tinnitus from seeing Jeff Mills almost 48 hours ago

condom broke when i was shagging a prozzie last week

just noticed a lump on my ballbag

nice of her to get me a christmas present x

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>>69076403
>LSD has evolved my mind so far I'm within perhaps the top 1000 most enlightened people on the planet right now

You're not supposed to browse the Reddit frontpage

You're supposed to browse niche topics/stuff you find interesting

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>being a janny on Christmas Day

just checked my discogs account and there's 7 messages from 2 years ago about wanting to buy a random throwaway house record from 2010 for really outrageous prices

what gives? is it some kind of scam?

>>69076467

https://www.reddit.com/r/incel

love this

>>69076467
>muh micro-reddittries

>>69076398
>I cba to revise
>might just kill myself
Ah yes.
Just fucking study and get your UCAS sorted you mong. Get therapy too

>>69076350
me best mate on pic related

>>69076456
Is that from Akira?

everybody gets high sometimes y'know

I wouldnt shag you with a tramps cock you loony header

>>69076104
lads i just realized.
/gf2016/ has technically been a success
see I just stopped caring about it and beed myself and now i have gf. it actually worked. did i trick myself?

>>69076036

I was shaving my balls over the sink with the leccy razor and cut my sack, blood was dripping down and coagulating in the pubes in the sink. i then pissed on the whole mess to get it down the plughole.

ah yes christmas

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>>69076036
fuckin' same happened to me twice this year, 'twas a good thing I was destined for the shower anyway (before those happened).
ugh, a mentally tough to go thru, sorting it out.

I'M A VIRGIN LOOOOOOOOL I'VE NEVER HAD SEX WITH A WOMAN IM A FUCKING UGLY LOSER CUNT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA EVEERYOPNE LAUGH AT MEEEEEEEEE

>>69076168
*north stockport

>>69075429
All terrible

>>69076398
hope you get an offer from man met x

>>69076520

literally physical unable

fingers just wont move the mouse to open google drive or ucas

what gives

>>69076403
I once experienced the eight circuit for merely an instant.

>>69076520
>>69076520
stop telling everyone to get therapy you fucking wimp

>>69076559
ok

hahaha

liver took a right battering today

same again tomorrow

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>>69076563
STOCKPORT
FUCKING
MENTIONED

>>69076559
HAHAAHAHAHAHA ALRI MEEEEE HAHAA FUCKING HEEEL THE ABSOLUTTTE STATE OF US WAHAHAHAAAHAHA SCREAMING WITH LAUGHTER HAHAAAHAAHA

MRS BROWN

>>69076490
creasing at this

Got No Mans Sky today, played it for about an hour

not very fun is it

>>69076433
go to uni or get a job

somebody post the original kev vids pls

Visited 10 foreign nations in both 2015 and 2016, only one was in both years (UAE)

Ah yes you never smoked weed until trying it to treat muscle pains instead of your nhs prescription opiate drugs ah yes i believe yes

>>69076620
What on earth made you want to buy that game?

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>I once experienced the eight circuit for merely an instant.

i will lose my v (by honest means ie no escorts) before 25 or do a 'cide i promise

>>69076398
fuck off underage

>>69076641

Someone bought it for me silly

>>69076647
how old are you now?

>>69076559
autistic behavior like that certainly won't help.

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teeth are going wobbly

please kill me

>>69076669
Oh, tell them you had fun with it then haha

should i eat the trifle or the gateau (black forest) lads

quite hungry

>>69076608
alri settle down

>>69076682
very synthwavey picture

Watched an russian amateur porno of a rich small dicked bloke with two absolutely wiped out twinks in a dark and dirty karaoke room, everyone absolutely fucked off their minds.

Would normally cum buckets but it looked so post-apocalyptic i couldn't get off. Russia is fucked

>>69076682
Are you on drugs

>>69076634
rasheed

>>69076467
this 2bh
I'm only subbed to the OSRS, Cities:Skylines, and two other tiny subreddits that have like 25k subs combined

>>69076688
Might get some trifle myself desu.

>>69076634
How so many?

>>69076608
>>69076559
MAAAAATE HAHAHAHAHA MATE THIS IS TRUR HAHAHAHA IM FUCKING VILE LOOKIN HAHAHA I CAME HOME FROM THE BAR LAST NIGHT TO A LOCKED DOOR AND MY BABY BROTHER ASKED MY MUM WHY THERES A PIZZA SHOUTING THROUGH THE LETTERBOX LOOKING TO GET IN YOOO LOO

>>69076305

Just don't throw any opiates in the mix and you won't Heath Ledger

>>69076667

did a level before 2 years of college x

never heard a pornographic film be described as post-apocalyptic before

>>69076728
couldnt janny change desu back to tee bee aitch just for one day? as a present for us?

I miss it bad.

>>69076467
Never browsed reddit in my life, all I know is theres a fucking lot of subreddits apparently, how do you find stuff you like? are they tagged?

>>69076674
23

>>69076682
filling came out and it hurts but earliest dentist appointment is in february haha fml

>>69076678
i dont fucking care anymore mate

i was destined to live alone

just becuase you're a fucking 10/10 mnormie cunt doesn't ,ean you get to project yourself onto me i will be a virgin forever and there's nothing you or i canm do about it HAHAHAHAHAAHAH i win

>>69076759
Doesn't even bother me at this point desu.

>>69076759
Agreed.

Janny can you change it back to t b h I genuinely really miss it

>>69076747
hello newfag

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>>69075429
>not "rate the 'cogs".
n.b.: this is just 1 purchase and not my full collection, I've been on it since mid-2010 but mostly off until 2014 save for a few disks.

Alri alri alri runties

>>69076781
Anon, stop drinking and go to sleep.

>>69076759
yeh this honestly triggers me a lot

don't think i can be at peace unless the filter is removed

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rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

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>texts me saying how shit her christmas day was and how she was just thinking about being in bed with me all day
>when I ask to go over she declines

don't write cheques your fanny can't cash love

>>69076581

I glimpsed universal consciousness on my last trip

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>>69076559

this

this is the battlecry of our generation

I don't get how people get so depressed about not having sex or having a gf desu

>>69076739
what?

dont understand this wording

you did your a levels and THEN went to college? to do what exactly?

you went to college, did your a levels and then didnt do anything for 2 years? and just now applying for uni?

explain

>>69076806
>Larger economy than Wales
yeah really impressive

https://www.reddit.com/r/Cuckold/
https://www.reddit.com/r/Stims/
https://www.reddit.com/r/opiates/

ah yes

>>69076846
life revolves around sex mate

everything else is a sideshow

>>69076855
subbed to all of them haha

>>69076855
the utter state of your life

>>69076822
shes probably busy doing things with family, give her the benefit of the doubt its hard to juggle different relationships on christmas

>>69076863
grow up

>>69076620

Haven't played it but it suffers from the problems elite dangerous does I imagine

>>69076703
Think I might have seen this.

>>69076846
They have been brainwashed by the societal jew

>>69076882
what is the purpose of life

>>69076847

1 year a level 2 years on a course related to a specific field then uni next sept x

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Just aligned my 7th charka

>>69076703
pretty sure I've seen this

>>69076821
pretty solid but no killers

shut up you fat twat

>>69076703
sauce

>>69076932
im sorry?

>>69076932
hey you wind your fucking neck in

*starts windmilling towards you*

>>69076911
so 3 years in total? so you're what, 19? 20?

weird

>>69076976
would

>>69076976
he was pretty feminine to begin with

>>69076806
Who is it referring to? Norn Iron?

>>69076986

18, starting Uni at 19, is that weird desu?

>>69077000
has a willy though

>>69076976
would, both

>>69076806
>Scotland and Wales independence from England are because of economy and size

Nothing to do with that you twat, plus Wales and Scotland have barely any power anyway.

Mud in the UK is a dark brown colour whereas mud in Africa is an orange colour

>>69077026
incredibly weird

>>69076762
I have desu
-Tom

>>69077007
probably england because scotland is much larger than NI

>>69076846

erm you're kind of failing at your main purpose in life.

you're just a vessel that carries DNA and propagates it, you're a flesh cocoon for the DNA god. your DNA is clearly malfunctioned and deficient if you cannot accomplish this task.

no women is denied the primary biological imperative of living beings: reproduce herself. Her job is to make the best of what's in the dating pool (which in turn implements the Darwinian survival of only the fittest)

Since one man can "take" a large number of women, men need to compete. And many fail, thus the existential nightmares.

>>69076976
What a waste

>>69077026
shut the fuck up

>>69076846
They're the same ''men'' who go clubbing alone to try and creepily hit on women, never succeeding. Pathetic, unloved and sexually depraved.

Normies don't care about sex. They're good looking, extroverted and well adjusted so it happens spontaneously.

>>69076976
Step 1 - be attractive

>>69076976
same person
mental

>>69076982
*pulls down pants, grabs todger and starts windmilling back at you*

>>69077007
Yorkshire

>>69077031
so

>>69077026
fuck me you're a little babby

Fear me

>>69077092
>>69077092

Watched a Russian porn recently, two lads - one with a fupa and dead eyes, one with spiky gelled hair - having silent, passionless sex in a boiler room. Was really depressing.

>>69077050
getting laid is easy tho

I just choose not to because I'm too lazy

the people who whinge about it literally never make effort to get a girl, besides glancing forlornly at every other girl they see and hoping she notices. Girl ain't going to fall out the sky and on to your keyboard

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wish I wasn't ugly LOL

>>69077007

Yorkshire innit

>>69076821
>The Kooks
I love that bit when Simon Amstell took the piss out of them by imitating them singing in northern accents.

>>69077050
do people unironically think like this